Ox lifted the rocket launcher over his shoulder, aiming it at the armored truck. Some might have called it overkill, but they already failed the big man once … it was never a good idea to do it twice. "Keep it steady Montana." He told his college, trying to get his footing right.
"Yeah yeah, I hear ya, just give me a second. It's traffic night in New York." The man justified, moving steadier and steadier … now. He clicked the launcher, watching the rocket fly forward …
BOOM
As the cargo truck exploded, falling to its side and sliding on the ground. Their own ride slowed down for interception. "A bit more messy than the usual set up, don't ya think?" Fancy Dan rolled his eyes.
"Messy but necessary. The whole city's beginning to crawl with varmints coming out of the woodworks, and not just the annoying do-gooder types..m" Montana groaned. "Whatever we're stealing is supposed to even the odds of whoever the Boss wants."
So technology that went toe to toe with the clowns of the city … Ox idly rubbed his jaw, remembering the hit from that turtle. "I'd like to take it for myself." He muttered, jumping out of their ride.
"The only thing we're taking is this gizmo to Hammerhead, nothing more." There were pros and cons to Montana being so professional 24/7. The work ethic was incredible, but it also made him a bit of a stick in the mud, so Ox was still in need of a drinking buddy for was Fancy Dan, but things always got … weird, when the man was drunk.
Ox strolled up, ripping open the back door of the armored truck, moving through the semi conscious guards in the back. A plus side to being over six feet tall and capable of snapping bones was the almost instant intimidation and respect almost everyone gave him. "Like taking candy from a rich, oversized baby." He plucked up the case holding what they needed.
"So much security for one case." Fancy Dan observed. "Gotta be one heck of a gadget if Tricorp went through all this trouble to transport it."
He nodded, getting back in as they rode a good few miles in silence to the meet up point, seeing a familiar figure with a suit and large forehead. "You boys do good work when masked vigilantes aren't involved." Hammerhead nodded.
"It's a big city, not even five multi-colored freaks can cover every crime all at once." Montana returned the gesture and presented the case. "I believe the big man will be satisfied."
"The cargo's for you." Hammerhead spoke, pushing the case back over. "We'd like to take our own step into the super vs super world."
"So the boss wants me to join the freakshow as well? Very well." Not an ounce of complaining, that's what Ox meant by stick in the mud. You could show just a little annoyance every once in a while. After unlocking it, they stared in silence for a few seconds at the object in the case.
"What's with the color scheme?" Fancy Dan asked.
"What's with the fishnet theme?" Ox said confused.
"Who the hell is Baxter Stockman?" Montana raised an eyebrow.
"The what, why, and who don't matter." Hammerhead shut them all up. "The only thing that does matter is that this doohickey should make squashing one friendly neighborhood Spider-man all the more easier."
"While I admit that I'd rather not wear something so bright and gaudy …" Montana started, before letting out a genuine grin. "The idea of punching those masks in the face does give me a nice little feeling in my heart."
"Speaking of, you're free to turn three of those turtles into roadkill, but bring one back alive." Hammerhead further explained. "The Foot Clan is offering up a sizable portion of the city for any of them to be served on a silver platter to their leader."
"Fair enough. We're gonna need the two buffoons though, set some bait to make it easier." Montanna noted to the man.
"I'll make a generous donation to their bail." The man nodded, walking away.
"... So are you gonna paint the suit?" Fancy Dan asked after he was sure the right hand man of the Big Man was gone.
"If it gets the job done, there's no need to mess with it." Seriously, the man needed to lighten up
"So log five of seven into the power of four is … two hundred and seventy?" Harry asked hopefully. For once, Peter was actually around to tutor him. Not only that, Gwen was there in the inevitable case Peter was going to bail, so that doubled his chances at not failing the next trig test. April and Irma were actually pretty decent at it too, so the young Osborn was actually feeling optimistic about passing for once.
"Two hundred and forty five." Peter responded. "I think you added a couple extra four hundred." The boy tried to help write it out to show him the error.
"How is it we're allowed the use of calculators but you still manage to work without one?" April asked skeptically, surprisingly less hostile from when the whole 'Peter taking pictures' debogle came out. He understood why Gwen would be quick to forgive, but the other red head in the group seemed like the type to hold a grudge.
"You're talking about the guy who got excited about getting a microscope for his birthday and fell asleep reading a textbook at night." Gwen snickered. "Pretty sure his blood's been replaced with math calculations by this point.
"Says the girl who thought that watching professor proton was a perfectly reasonable show for little children." Peter rolled his eyes with a smirk. "I don't need a microscope to know a hypocrite when I see one."
"No, you just need a camera to take pictures while we fend for ourselves." Awkward silence followed. "Too soon?"
"Don't sweat it, I'm used to it." Peter sighed. "So…Eddie's still mad at me?" He asked nervously to Gwen.
"Not completely….he played darts with a photo of you in the center of the target for a few hours, but he calmed down a little after I explained the situation with May." Gwen responded with a sigh. "You really should get better at explaining yourself, Pete. We could've thought of something together had you told us the situation before."
"Aunt May is my responsibility, I shouldn't have to drag others into it." He responded. "Our family was never one for charity."
"So … how 'is' life at the Daily Bugle?" Harry asked, a bit to change topics, another bit to rest his brain from the work that was killing it.
"Dunno, I'm going there to get paid tomorrow." He responded. "But I heard that Rand's dad works there, so it's probably as nice as him."
"Seriously, have you not read anything the head of the Bugle, J. Jonah Jameson publishes?" Irma, who had been quiet the entire time, finally spoke up. "He's been known to go on long angry tangents about anything he's biased about, heck. Pretty much every cover story he's written in the past three months has just been rants against Spider-man."
The boy shrugged. "A part of me thinks that there needs to be someone against him, or he'll get a cocky head. Nice balance between the good and evil, you know?" Peter said with a smile.
"Has he always been this morbid?" April asked the two of them.
"Not always last I checked." Harry answered. "It mostly popped up in the last month of sophomore year. That's also when you stopped wearing glasses too." Not to mention the small growth spurt.
"Yeah, I switched to contacts." The boy chuckled nervously. "Figured it would be easier than them dropping to the ground all the time like Velma."
"You just don't know how to wear them properly, like some people." Gwen smirked proudly.
Irma reached out a hand to high five. "Preach it sister."
"Alright, enough about me, let's get back to studying so Harry won't have to repeat junior year." Peter spoke up, and Harry was dreading the frying his brain was about to be subjected to when a ring popped up. "Hold on, just got an email alert." He looked at his phone. "Oh crap, I'm supposed to pick up my check today!?"
"What, Peter Parker mismanaged his time? That never happens." Harry rolled his eyes, expecting this to come up at some point.
"I'm sorry, I'll come back later, I promise!" The boy stood up, running to the streets. "Taxi, I need a taxi!"
"Well at least you guys are still around." Harry sighed in relief, looking at the others.
"Yeah, I don't have anything else going on today…" April nodded, only for an alert to come from her phone too. "Until now, sorry! Gotta bounce!"
"Huh, but I thought you said you were free today?" Irma asked in confusion. "Maybe I can come along and.."
"Sorry, private business, gotta get going!" And April left the room without another trace.
"Okay, I'm used to Peter flaking, he did that all summer.." Harry stated as the red head left the room. "I didn't peg April one to do it too. Figured she had her life more organized then Pete."
"You know Peter's been weird since his uncle died." Gwen reminded him. "And April's dad is missing. I almost get the same way when my dad goes out on his job. It's nerve wracking for everyone."
"How is it I'm the only one in the group who'd genuinely think he'd be better off without his dad influencing his life?" He asked.
"Nah, parents are dicks. Anarchy is the only way to go." Irma smirked.
"I cannot tell when you're joking and it scares me." Harry answered honestly, internally sighing. While the help was appreciated, he couldn't just keep relying on his friends, and his dad would never see him as a success unless he did it on his own.
There was always the….green option. Dad didn't notice when a couple vials went missing, and he had a whole stash in his room. And it wasn't like being shady wasn't an Osborn trait. Dad made deals with that Hammerhead guy and he always came out on top. Like Stormin Norman always says, you needed to 'cowboy up'
"Foswell!" J. Jonah Jameson shouted out at the reporter. "What do you have for me!?"
The man began hastily flipping through his notes. "It seems that the Foot Clan is making moves in the city. They're pretty old, but they have some deep roots."
"Foswell, you better come up with decent evidence to back your claim in five point two seconds, or I'm tossing your keister into yesterday's garbage! The bugle is about printing the truth, not telling folktales about ancient ninja's running the streets!"
"I'll do my best sir, but I'll be on radio silence until then." The man nodded, running out of the door.
"Lee! What are you working on this time!" He shouted to the erratic man.
"Right now I'm trying to find out who the hell Spider-Man is, but the leads always end up dead." The man sighed.
"Figure it out in ten point seven seconds, or I'll throw you to the crows!" At the least, the man was working on something decent, ridding the city of menaces in masks. "Ms. Brant, where's my coffee!? I asked for it three-point-five minutes ago!"
"It's on your desk, sir." His security answered without looking up from her paperwork. "Your wife also called to remind you that your son's coming home tonight for dinner."
He drank it in one go, sighing in relief. "Make sure to remind me at six thirty sharp! I don't want to be a second late!" He shouted. Jameson rarely got to see John, with him being in the space program. As a father, he never felt prouder. "Now where the hell is that Parker guy!?" He didn't want to wait forever.
"Um … here?" He turned to some boy in the corner. "I tried to introduce myself, but you said if I interrupted you again you'd toss me out of the window with your bare hands."
"Don't get testy with me kid, I'm still contemplating it." He answered. "So you're Peter Parker, eh? Bit on the small side aren't yah? I was expecting someone old enough to have armpit hair."
"Ahh … you can never be too young to make a living?" The boy said in a questioning manner.
"So you got gumption, good. Last thing I need is for spineless wimps to be in my employ." He turned to his secretary. "Ms. Brant! Write the kid a check for his photos."
"Already on it." At least there was one person in this building that knew proper time management.
"Wow, I don't know what to say sir…" The kid looked happy and ecstatic. Loved the eagerness, best to capitalize on it before the kid realized he could bargain for a higher pay.
"Jameson." He responded instantly. "And what you're going to say is 'i'll get more pictures of Spider-Man in seventeen point five seconds, or I'll be looking for a new job'!" He shouted.
"Hey wait, you're the kid that took the photos of Spider-Man?" Lee asked with a spark in his eye.
"Ah, yeah, he's been around for a while, I just managed to get a few decent shots." More like the only shots. The kid needed a new camera as well, the cheap disposable kind wasn't going to cut it if he wanted to be in this business long term.
"I've been interviewing people that he's saved, and during the 'Electro' incident there was a girl that said he was fighting around four giant mutant turtles. Do you think it was a gas leak or …"
"Oh, it was definitely a gas leak. There was an attack at ESU, the place has a lot of chemicals, not healthy for the brain." The kid rushed towards the door. "Sorry, gotta get going now if I still want to get paid!"
"A kid with gumption." Jameson smiled, before scowling at the rest of his crew. "Why can't you all be that energetic!?"
Montana waited in the corner of the city dump. He knew he wasn't expecting much from those dunderheads, but he expected them to at least be capable of driving fast. At this rate, the big man was going to go into debt for all the bail he pulled on those dolts. The only plus was figuring out the nifty little defense feature installed inside this thing while he waited. Boy, weren't they in for a shock …
Shock … Shocker? If he was wearing this getup, he might as well have a name to go with it. Maybe it could up the pay for him and his boys on future assignments. Montana could faintly hear the screeching of tires, it seems they've finally shown up.
The boys drove inside, jumping out of the car with a scared look on their faces. A familiar web swung by. "Well well well, my friends, I believe this may be our first legitimate surender." Spoke the voice of a certain spandex wearing vigilante. "How nice that some of your first crooks help demonstrate it in person, makes one teary eye all of sudden."
"I'm still going to wail on them a bit." And lo and behold, the red turtle, 'Rapheal' if the reports were to be believed, landed on top of Marko and O'hern.
The blue turtle, 'Leonardo' from said reports, was actually keeping a distance, looking around. "Why would they close themselves off if they knew we were coming after them?" It seemed one of the freaks actually had a brain. Go figure. Montana raised his arm.
REEEEE
His blast hit them in the shell, sending them flying. "That would be me." He stepped out of the shadows. "For all intents and purposes, you can call me Shocker."
The one in orange, Michelangelo, fell on his back and laughed. "The Shocker!? HA, okay, that name is actually lame enough to be hilarious! For once, I don't mind not naming you myself."
"It might be lame." His suit began to vibrate fast enough to mess up the insides of said turtle. "But I feel it's accurate." Before they were launched off, hitting a wall.
The purple turtle that knocked him out on the first job, 'Donatello', looked at him with wide eyes. "A suit capable of generating mass vibrations into a physical attack. How the heck did you get your hands on that?"
"Don't say how, but it's a little invention courtesy of a man named Baxter Stockman." He responded, blasting him away. "It's irrelevant however. All you really need to know is I made a promise to squash a bug, and turn three turtles into soup." Montana shot a couple of shots at the red turtle and the spider.
"Well, on the bright side, one of us gets to live." 'Michelangelo' jumped over him and attempted to wrap him around with his chains, only for them to instantly come apart upong contact. "Aw."
"What do you know? Either you hogtie worse than a cowboy using spaghetti, or this little gizmo gives me more than just protection from my own weapon." He grinned as he sent another blast into the orange one. "So stay still while I put four of yah out of your misery."
"Not to me you won't!" He turned as a sai was inches from his face … stopped, vibrating violently before being knocked away.
"You wanna double check that?" He asked, rearing his fist back before hitting Raphael in the stomach, hitting him point blank. "Long range, short range, I'm completely covered."
"Oh really? I think you missed a few spots, don't worry, I got it!" The Wall Crawler lifted up one of the cubed chunks of garbage over his head and threw them right at Shocker
"I doubt it." He blasted right through the trash pile and straight next to the mobile little clown. "I'm pretty thorough in my cleaning regimen." He continued tracing after the man.
"Oh is that so, then let's try bleaching that awful color scheme!" They tried to throw more trash, which he blasted away, only for the gauntlets to stop firing.
He idly turned behind him, watching the vibrating sword. "I guess attacking and defending at the same time is too much for that suit." Spoke the grinning turtle, clenched teeth as he tried to keep the sword pinned on his vibrating barrier.
"You got moxxy, I'll tell you that much, turtle. Maybe that'll keep you alive long enough for me to hand you over to the Foot." Shocker focused the power to the max, sending out a massive shockwave that spreaded all over the place.
"You're working with the Foot!?" Spider-Man shouted, trying to web him down. "And here you seemed like such a well adjusted individual! You know, besides trying to murder us and the use of a southern accent."
"I have no say or interest in whatever affairs you freaks fumbled your way into, I'm just a man doing his job, nothing more, nothing less." Montana answered curtly as blasted through the webbing and sent the wall crawler flying into the trash compactor. "Though it is a job that I love." Sending a smaller blast, he hit the control panel, and turned the compactor on.
"Spidey!" Michelangelo shouted, rushing towards the soon-to-be squashed bug before Shocker struck from behind.
"Hold on, you varmints, I was just about to get to yah, no need to be impatient for yah demise." He responded. "Now which one of you should I drag for the ride … too much respect for blue, and purple's going down for that helicopter incident."
"The only thing that's going to be dragged is your sorry and ugly hide into a jail cell." Rapheal called out, about to charge right into a fully powered blast at close range.
"Now if that didn't work the first time, why would it work the second?" He asked out of a mix of curiosity and annoyance.
"Because if you're watching the front, who's watching your back?" The red masked turtle smirked as the sound of a honking truck could be heard, as well as the flash of headlights coming his way.
"Clever little bastard." He swung out his fists, forcing out energy as he tried to slow down the truck to nothing. He went to check on the passenger … only to find nothing but a brick. "They didn't." Turning around, the turtle freaks were nowhere to be seen. "Ohhh … I will make turtle soup out of you vermin yet."
"..Did we…get em?" O'hern asked out loud, having been flung into a pile of garbage in all the mayhem.
"Spider's squashed, so that means the job's only half done." Montana began making his way out. He had a responsibility, after all.
April sat in the lair as the turtles worked. "When we made fun of Baxter for needing money, I didn't expect him to make something like that." Peter groaned, stretching out as his body cracked. "I got stuck in a trash compactor, I work for a boss that is dedicated to running my reputation, and I had to get a replacement check because the first got soaked in garbage juice. The only consolation is that I already smell like sewer sweat, so the trash is nothing I can't clean out."
"Yeah … not to mention the picture isn't helping." April agreed, looking at the headline of the Bugle. 'Spider-Man is trash. Metaphorical, AND literal.' Can't say they weren't clever.
"You know, all things considered, it got the good side of your face." Raph snarked.
"I know, if it was my bad side, I might have ended up worse than you." Peter rolled his eyes. "You're so lucky I don't use any pics with you guys, or it would be your face buried in garbage all over the Bugle front page."
"Anyone find it really weird that the bad guys we arrest never report us?" Mikey asked.
"Probably embarrassed enough getting their butts handed to them by a teenager in spandex." Donnie guessed. "Four giant turtles would probably make them lose any semblance of dignity."
"Alright, enough focusing on the bad stuff, we need a new plan to fight … what was it, Shocker?" Leo asked.
"Again, this is the only time I'll let a lame name slide." Mikey snickered.
"Well from what I gathered while you all were getting your shells kicked." Donnie inputted. "It works by creating vibrational energy, then either emitting it around the suit, or shooting it across the air." He explained. "It seems to have a limited processing power however, as he can't do two things at once."
"Yeah, when I went in close, it seemed like the suit prioritizes defense over anything else." Leo answered.
"Well it was made by Stockboy, it's bound to be made to protect wimps." Raph snarked. "So we just rush the bastard until his suit gives in."
"Sure, if you want to be blasted into next week." Peter pointed out. "But you are on the right track. We just need to think of bigger damage than a couple of blades and fists. Something to really strain the systems."
"That's not going to matter if we can't figure out where he is." Donnie continued to type on his laptop. "Fortunately seismic activity is rare in New York. Next time he uses his suit, we can locate where he is."
"Good, now that actually gives me a little breathing to process everything else." Peter groaned as he slumped on the couch.
"The new job is already stressing you out?" April asked.
"Meh, Jolly J is a little intense in person, but he's pretty good when it comes to free time and paying me when needed." The boy said in relief. "I'm talking about how I'm flaking on Harry. His dad really gets on him about his grades."
"Right, almost forgot how intense Mr. Osborn is." April shivered. First time she met him she felt like he had the power to ruin her whole life with one look. "So he's always been that way?"
"For as long as I can remember." Peter recalled. "It was back in Freshman year when we first met. I was the standard bottom of the barrel nerd and Harry was the rich kid that people constantly took advantage of. He needed help with his homework one day and we've been clicking ever since. Old Stormin Norman said it was because I was 'the best example' for a friend he could have."
"Yesh." Leo shuddered. "Sounds like a creep."
"You have no idea. Harry jokes that his dad wants to adopt me, and I'm afraid that someday it'll actually be true." The boy winced. "Now I've gotta juggle helping him, taking down Shocker, pictures of Spider-Man that don't have you guys, an investigator that's curious about you guys, taking care of Aunt May, and my curfew."
"Somehow you make being human more complicated than being a mutant ninja turtle living in secret in the sewers." Raph chuckled. "For us, we just kick butt then eat pizza."
"Some creatures have all the luck." April rolled her eyes. "I can try helping Harry if you need a load off man. I'm no super genius, but I'm pretty good at trig."
"Thank you, I'd appreciate it. I'd be one less worry off my conscience." He really put the whole weight of the world on his shoulders, didn't he? Miracle he hasn't snapped yet. "Maybe we can-" The walls and floor began to shake. "That's either Shocker or an invasion of Mole People…not sure which would be worse in all honesty."
"I'd fight some Mole People, we could make peace with them and have an army." Mikey smiled.
"It's probably the Shocker, i'll triangulate the … hang on, it's actually in morse code." Donnie noted.
Peter looked at the beats. "Come … and … get … me … turtles …"
"Well I've seen worse ways for someone asking to get their butt whooped." Raph pounded his fists together.
"Alright team, let's give Shocker the shock he's been looking for." … Everyone turned to Leo. "I like to think I've been improving."
"Between you and Spidey, it's like we're trapped in a web of endless puns and one liners." Donnie grumbled as they got up.
"Yes, please leave the webbing to the professionals." Peter said as he took off his shirt … revealing the costume underneath.
"Wait, you just wear that thing all the time?" Mikey asked.
"Yeah, it's the fastest way to get changed into my costume. Why else do you think I'm always wearing long sleeved sleeves?"
"To fool people into assuming the biggest nerd in midtown doesn't have muscles?" April pointed out.
"Have you seen Eddie? I can't compare to muscles like that." Peter smirked as he put on his mask. "Now let's give this pillow faced goon the shock of his life."
"Again, endless web…..one painful, endless web." Donnie groaned.
Spidey jumped through the window of the abandoned theater, swinging around with a bit of the mental weight from today lifting. April knowing was a godsend, even if he was a bit concerned for her. If someone like Aunt May or Gwen discovered him, they'd probably do everything to keep him from throwing himself to the wolves. But with April, he had a confidant, that was also human, who knew just as much as him what it was like to want to keep on going despite knowing how crazy and messed up the world could be.
Not only that, he finally had that job he's been looking for to support Aunt May, even if he agreed to set aside ten percent for a new camera, and another five perfect to help with the turtles 'pizza fund'. He actually had money to spend! That, combined with a team he could trust to watch his back, and for once, Parker Luck was giving him the goods. Now he just had to deal with one gaudy looking eyesore to make this week perfect.
"Hello New York supervillain!" Shocker looked up in surprise. "Rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated."
"It appears they have. I say, you have more lives than a bag full of cats." The gloves began vibrating. "Allow me to rectify that." With another scratch of the air, he was forced to avoid a blast of vibrating air.
"So, you invite the Turtles out for a movie date? Didn't take you for that kinda guy Shocker." He quipped as he launched a few more webs. "No need to hide it, I'm sure the world's ready to accept the love between man and reptile."
"If you're going to insult the villain, don't drag me into it!" Donnie shouted, trying to throw some ninja stars, which were easily repelled off.
"And here I thought you were supposed to be the smart one, guess you can't expect much from a bunch of shell heads." Shocker turned his attack to Donnie as the villain sent him into the chairs, smashing about ten rows of them.
"And I'ya reckon you can't expect much for the poor partner calling himself the Shocka!" Mikey swug around the abandoned sandbags from the backstage and flung them at the villain using his own mock accent. "Might as well call ya'self the Shaker, or the Vibrator!"
"Don't you mock me boy!" Shocker screamed as he blasted the backstage into pieces. He never felt such pride in a fellow jokester.
"Aww, does someone not like the good old county of Texas getting trashed?" Raph snarked as he tossed a chair. "Because your reputation is already doing it for us."
"Don't talk like that, he perfectly represents all the rodeo clowns you'd find over there." Leo added on as he made all the chandelier and ceiling lights fall on top of the villain.
"Would you lot shut up!" They began blasting anywhere they saw a turtle or spider.
"Wow, congrats, you're getting close to beating Electro's anger management levels of raw rage." Spidey quipped as he tossed broken rubble created by Shocker right back at him. "Good for you for winning the 'biggest insecure villain award'!"
"Oh like you are doing anything other than running your mouths AND your legs!" He argued back, the entire building beginning to break apart, with more and more debri falling on top of Shocker naturally, making his suit burst out more and more defensive shockwaves, creating more debri, and so on.
"Or we could place everything in the right spot to overload those oh so limited processors." Spidey countered as the shockwaves started to fade as the suit sparked. "Stockman was a genius, but he wasn't flawless."
"You … little … PESTS!" Shocker shouted as the suit burst, the debris crushing the man flat.
"So … was he public enough to toss in a jail cell?" Leo asked, panting a bit.
"He will be when the Bugle posts the pictures I took …" He paused. "Hopefully the non blurry ones."
"So we bag the baddy, you get the money, and we keep our existence ignored by the public." Donnie chuckled. "Gotta say, not a bad setup to have."
"I know right?" Mikey smiled. "The guy under the mask is awesome, Spidey." Nice for someone to acknowledge it for once.
"… Hey, did we sweep to make sure no one else was here?" Raph asked.
The police sirens outside answered that question for them. "Nope." Spidey said as he webbed Shocker's unconscious body up. "Let's bounce, Turtles, we'll have to meet our adoring public another time."
"Aww, but I wanted to sign autographs." He idly heard the familiar sound of Mikey being knocked upside the head. Like Peter said earlier, Parker luck was finally showing him favor for once.