December 24, 1997

Percy's office was very comfortable. He had two bookshelves (he was very proud of his first adult purchases) covered in various books on law and policy with a few bric-a-bracs I had added to try and make it look homier and inviting. I had also added a thick red rug to try and chase away some of the damp of London. Percy's secondary pride and joy was his second-hand solid oak desk that I... Had a few different fantasies about that I was wondering how to voice.

If times were normal, the two of us could have gone out and enjoyed holiday festivals and sampled alcohol at stalls while looking at handcrafted goods, so we had to engage with the internal amusements a home could provide two young people with time on their hands. Most of it involved long chats about politics, the news, my gossip from the MACUSA Embassy and Lucinda's latest project instead of indulging in the possibilities of our love nest.

Percy glanced up at me when I entered the office with a radiant grin that made my stomach flip.

"I thought I left you in bed?"

Perhaps putting on one of his dress shirts instead of my nightgown was a silly idea, but the way his eyes moved over me made it seem so much less silly and more of a sensual decision. My hair was loose and messy from our morning activities, which Percy started by kissing my neck and wishing me a Merry Christmas.

"You did, I just missed you."

I put the tray I was holding with two mugs and a kettle of hot cider on an empty shelf that I planned to put some sort of silly display on and walked over to Percy, trailing behind his chair to slide my arms over his shoulders in a hug and kiss him on the cheek.

Percy's hand reached upwards to twine with mine as I kissed him again before releasing him. I didn't get very far because he was still holding my hand and half guided me around the chair as I moved towards the desk. Percy laughed and tried to guide me into his lap. I teased him by seeming to agree to the suggestion before slipping out of his hand to sit on his desk next to his papers and crossing my legs with a playful smile.

"I get nothing done with you about."

"That's part of the fun."

Percy's fingers moved slowly up and down my bare legs as he propped his elbow on the desk.

"My lap is more comfortable than the desk."

"That's debatable." He was squeezing the back of my calf now, I never realized how ticklish I was there. "You're very bony."

"Because we're both terrible cooks."

"True, Tinsy keeps threatening to come and cook for us on a permanent basis."

"She would find that terribly boring. No need for large meals with just the two of us."

I reached over Percy to where we kept our account books for the household budget. I had multiple reasons for leaving the rumpled sheets of our bed. Partially for Christmas – Percy and I had yet to exchange gifts (and morning sex did not count as enjoyable as that was), and we needed to double check the household budget since our paychecks went out a couple of days early for the Christmas holidays.

We had multiple financial plans, all of which had an allotment for rent (which we shared between us), alternating weeks for food, upkeep on the flat and assorted supplies for living, treats for Hermes etc. The rest was divided between our savings accounts and donations to Thornell to feed the children as more arrived. Our savings were not stored in Gringotts aside from what was needed to not look suspicious and keep our accounts open at the bank, we had hidden the money in the flat and some at Thornell, just in case we had to leave the country in a hurry. Not stopping at the bank would give us time to get away and over the border, we had to assume some people would need to be paid off in the process of leaving or settling.

There was an unspoken understanding that this neutral state was not going to last.

"I think we'll survive another month."

"Good." Percy squeezed my leg affectionately. "That means we don't have to boil Hermes."

"There's not a lot of meat on your bird either," my hand slid into Percy's hair, mussing it as I ran my fingers through it and scratched his scalp gently. Percy leaned into my hand like a cat, which made me smile and try not to giggle too audibly. I didn't want him to be self-conscious.

Percy gave a muffled chortle and a delighted sort of smile that made my stomach flip at how attractive and unguarded he was in these moments. "He's spoiled. If we didn't feed him he'd starve."

Percy's hand found mine again and I finally acquiesced myself to being gently tugged into his lap with sigh while I playfully rolled my eyes and I slipped my arms around his neck, throwing my legs over the arm of his chair in the process. His hands had moved up to caress my hip and trace the line of my panties.

I wasn't sure I wanted to get him back into bed or explore the idea of being bent over the desk. Maybe we could just hide out here while I collected my nerves for that sort of suggestion.

Actually, we could hide out in the tiny office and drink the Christmas cider I got from one of the elderly Tea Witches at work. We were going to Thornell later to have drinks with Lucinda and Tavish, the latter had apparently been hiding a particularly vintage brandy and decided that there was no point in saving it for a victory, it was best enjoyed while we were all alive.

Thornell was where Percy and I had put most of our holiday energy this year as we tried to make something nice for the children with practical gifts and chocolate – things that were needed for the body and for the soul. The big pine tree Tavish had brought in had been carefully decorated with fairy lights and the Christmas ornaments that Lucinda had found in one of her storage rooms, they were surprisingly fun decorations of magical creatures and color changing bulbs that the children were fascinated by.

As for Percy and I, we had a very small tree in the living room that was very sadly decorated and lived a horrible life on our coffee table where Hermes would occasionally sit on it, knocking the tree off the table in the process. Hermes was not impressed with us apparently.

"What did your family do for the holidays when you were young?"

"You make us sound decrepit."

"You think you're forty-five," I pressed myself closer to him with a giggle.

"See, when you say that I sound like a cradle robber," Percy made an amused sort of noise and his finger slipped under the band of my panties.

"Come on, I'd love to know."

"Fine, fine." Percy straightened and cleared his throat, his arm leaving my shoulders to adjust his glasses to do his best impression of an old man, almost hitting me in the head in the process. "Back in my days of impetuous youth-"

"By the Twelve!" I laughed, my head rolling onto Percy's shoulder as his hand came back around my shoulders with a low laugh of his own.

"My mum makes the best treacle tart and pudding, and there was so much food that there managed to be leftovers for two days, even with nine people in the house." Percy laughed dryly, "She was always listening to Celestina Warbeck while she cooked. It was nice."

I was going to save my opinions of Celestina Warbeck, a great artist, but her preference for love songs were not generally what I was looking for on the radio.

"What about you?"

"My family? Um..." There was something in my swirling thoughts, "It was nice. We had blueberry muffins after opening our gifts. My dad would try to cook a ham – he's not a good cook. We gave Tinsy a day off, which made her nuts, which is why my father was cooking."

"Tinsy, Lucinda's house elf?"

Oh! That had not come up. "Um..." I kicked my legs a couple of times to try and collect my thoughts. "Well, Tinsy came with my mother as part of a dowry and I set her free when I left the Byrgen House. She followed me."

Percy gave me a blank stare. "She followed you? Across the ocean?"

"Yeah, I can't control Tinsy."

"That's insane."

"You've met Tinsy."

"She never came across as committable."

Tinsy kept no less than three different knives in her little apron. They were very visible. I had some deep concerns about Percy's version of 'committable'.

"You mean certifiable."

She was a very strange House Elf, but I do love her for it.

Percy shrugged, his brows knitting in confusion over my House Elf affiliate and her peculiarities. He moved his hand from my hip and took my hand in his, twining our fingers together and squeezing my hand to keep my attention. I noted how warm his hand was from my skin and I moved his hand to rest over my stomach.

"I can't give you that kind of life." Percy leaned forward slightly to adjust himself. "A House Elf to serve the family, a room with more rooms than the people living there need, I'm not even sure if I can provide you opportunities to go to stupid political parties or rub elbows with the influential for whatever cause you have decided to support." There was a brief lull between us. I understood that Percy was not finished speaking. "We'll be lucky to not be pariah's if this administration fails. We're both too close to all of these people and seen too much to ever escape suspicion."

"And with Jack as your father-in-law they'll see you as a puppet for his political whims and American interests by proxy." I could feel Percy's shoulder tensing under me. "If we parted ways as friends-"

"Absolutely not!"

"Oh," I allowed myself a smug smile that could put Percy to shame, "Because it sounded like you were trying to make an argument to end things while I'm sitting in your lap."

And after having raucous morning sex.

Percy exhaled slowly, choosing to realize that this conversation, under these conditions, was a special level of foot-in-mouth disease. He squeezed my hand tighter. "I'm offering you an out if you think that what I can give you is not enough to make you happy."

I released Percy's hand and reached up to caress his face, running my thumbs over his cheeks as I kept his gaze on me, taking in the vibrant blue of his eyes and the freckles that dotted his nose and ran rampant over his cheeks. This conversation required face-to-face communication.

"Absolutely not!"

"You're sure?" One of his hands moved to clutch my waist, pulling me to him to fill any remaining space between us.

"Percy Weasley, I love you." I took a deep breath, my face flushed from the suddenness of the declaration. They were words I had said before and often but the intensity which they had flown from me had been as surprising for me as it was for Percy, per his expression. "Even when you're saying stupid things, I love you."

"Oh."

How can someone be so smart, so brave and so endearingly stupid at the same time?

I brought one of his hands from my waist to my mouth and kissed the back of it before I decided to speak again.

"Listen carefully. I don't want a big fancy house. I don't want more power in the world than I already have that I have not earned myself. I don't want fancy parties and all the burdens and expectations that come with it. I've lived that life. I'm living it now and it's all just a pretty picture over something ugly." I kissed his hand again, my lips pressing firmly against a knuckle. "I'm ready to disappear from public life when this mess has come to an end and the world is finished recovering. I want a quiet life, a cottage where I can have a garden for our children to play in where we don't have to think about putting on airs for people outside of work. That is what would make me happy in life. A chance at a life that is ours, not defined by our careers and all the social niceties that overshadows the good work that can be done."

We had talked about this before, but not in such detail. I was now sure he thought I had been joking a bit in previous chats.

"What would make you believe that everything we are doing out of necessity now would make me happy in peacetime?"

"It's just... You're so good at it."

I heaved a sigh. "Percy, you can be good at things and not truly enjoy it. I doubt you always enjoy your paperwork." There was a light in his eyes at that and I suddenly knew exactly what kind of weirdo I had committed myself too. "Well, some people are good at things they don't enjoy. I... don't like the person I've had to become to get through this. I don't like this version of myself, it's dishonest and manipulative. Every interaction I have these days is focused on getting information from people to destabilize someone else or do something good with the bad things they tell me." I paused, "That thing with Eden and the WandWay cult, I only said that because I did not think it would come to pass, now it appears to be blowing out of control."

Percy nodded slowly, "There were a few more Americans at the Ministry Christmas party."

"I'm glad you noticed that too."

Percy puffed up slightly, "Well, I am very familiar with the species."

"Oh! How so?"

"They're loud."

"Are you saying I'm loud?"

I didn't realize what I walked into until he pressed his lips to my ear to whisper, "Under certain conditions."

He's a menace.

Isolt's panties, my face was blisteringly warm.

"I'm not sure if you're digging yourself a hole or not, but please continue."

His lips brushed against my cheek as he pulled back, all serious, thoughtful expression as he returned to the topic at hand.

"I thought it was strange that there seemed to be more, I thought that Eden girl would be the only one."

"Eh... I did and I didn't. Apparently WandWay likes to have dual citizenship for those born into the group, makes it easier to move around and find partners from similar groups abroad. I know my father has closed the American borders to British travelers, but Canada is a lot closer to Britain and might not be willing to start that fight entirely. The girls like Eden are leaving on their Canadian passports, so MACUSA has no idea they're even gone and if they know there's not a lot we can do under free travel with other nations."

Percy exhaled slowly, "That says a lot."

"Yeah, about how much the outside world knows about what is going on here. WandWay would not send people over here if they did not believe this venture would be successful." I exhaled slowly. "Do you understand why I'm done with politics?"

Percy leaned back and allowed his head to roll back to rest on the back of the chair and stare at the ceiling. "I don't think you need to step away entirely."

"What do you mean?"

"I think there is a lot more to a political career than rubbing elbows and writing policy. Most people don't understand their government and its workings very well, I understand if you don't want to get fully involved with the government anymore, but there is a lot to be said for holding them to account as an outside observer."

He wasn't wrong. Alex built his whole career being critical and informative about political and social matters. Maybe there was something there I could find a place in?

Maybe instead, I wanted something useful from my life, maybe politics did not feel useful. Maybe I wanted to not walk in my... Alex's footsteps any longer because of what I had seen it do to him. Perhaps I could be arrogant enough to think that I would not repeat his mistakes, but I was not.

If I survived until the end of the war, I could have time to figure out what it was I truly wanted and grow beyond Alex and the impact of my family, but I needed to come through this first. The war was my last hurdle to the life I wanted; I could manage the specifics of the picture later.

Percy kissed my forehead while I crossed my ankles to try and get a little bit of feeling back in my legs before deciding it would be healthier to get them off the arm of the chair and onto the floor.

"This is nice."

Percy made a noise of agreement.

"You going to sleep?"

"No, just thinking."

I burrowed a bit further into him as he tightened his grip.

"If we screw this up," I said slowly, understanding that I was touching on something sensitive to both of us, a topic we had only quietly, individually acknowledged. "We'll never get to see our siblings grow up."

Percy heaved a sigh, releasing my hand to pinch the bridge of his nose and shifting his glasses up slightly in doing so. "I know, believe me I'm reminded of that on a daily basis."

"Have you heard anything from the school?"

Percy shook his head. "Only the rumors at work about Snape and torturing students. I know there was some trouble with Ginny and some of her friends trying to steal something from the Headmaster's Office earlier this year, and some students were caught with forged documentation for their bloodstatus and taken away, but that was really the last I heard about it that I can confirm. Did you hear anything?"

"No, but, some of the kids at Thornell are still asking questions- they're not happy with anything I know. After that pamphlet of Valencia's came in, it's been almost nonstop questions and prodding me for information that I just don't have."

Percy breathed in slowly, counting to five before releasing. "Everything from Hogwarts has been far too quiet, I'll believe anything at this point."

"Agreed."

It was easy to know that anything was possible at this point. We had managed four months since the takeover of the Ministry and Scrimgeour's assassination and it felt like an eternity. I felt like the two of us had lived lifetimes in the span of weeks.

"Does it make sense for us to stay here?" I asked slowly, already knowing the answer to this oft discussed question. "We won't have a future of our own if we do."

"I don't think we can leave now. We know too much and I think that door of opportunity has closed to us."

If we were not being watched in some capacity, I would be shocked. I covered my tracks as well as I could, Percy stayed as outwardly quiet as he could manage, successfully managing to hide his afterwork activities when required.

"It's never too late. If we want to quit and go, I can make it happen."

Percy's fingers moved into my hair, beginning the process of slowly combing through it with his fingers. "No. I can't leave without my family. I need to know they're leaving too, because if they've left then there's no hope in this getting better."

"Right, is that our parameter then? The Weasleys leaving the country? Are we following them out or going with them?"

Percy shrugged. "I don't know."

Would they come and tell Percy to come with them? Or would they have to write Percy off to save most of the family? What a thing to contemplate! Could I leave all the work we had done here? Could I leave Alex to whatever fate had in store for him at the end of his road? Thalia? Valencia? I had heard nothing from Misty and Zara since they fled Britain and no news was good news these days.

What kind of things were going to come with the new year? More of the same sort of dystopia that I found myself almost bored by the mundanity of? Or were things going to come to a head in a nasty, sudden sort of way? I suddenly wished for a pinch for a pinch of the ability to throw bones like my father, even if it was an empty sort of lie for my own comfort.

By the Twelve, every day that passed, I could not help but think that I had a very high chance of returning to my father in a pine box. And that was if they threw caution to the wind to kill me quickly.

I couldn't think about that right now. With a few quiet words and suggestions, I found myself able to distract Percy for the next several minutes and at periodic intervals which ended with us becoming very acquainted with the beautiful, thick carpet on the floor of the office until we had to get ready to leave to see Lucinda.

Oo0Oo0

Author's Note: *Sprays the cast* Y'all horny! It's Christmas!