Even after the parade reached its final destination, Hercules wasn't ready to join the crowd. He stayed above them all with Megara perched on his shoulder, peering down at the roiling mass of hysteria. "I wish Phil mentioned crowd control during basic training," he mumbled.
"Maybe that can be my job," Megara suggested. "I'm a princess, so I have a little background knowledge on the topic."
"I don't trust those strangers with you," he said. "I bet they're jealous of you." He squeezed her thigh and made her shiver. How many other ways could he tease her? "I think they all want a piece of me."
"No kidding." Megara combed her fingers through his hair. "But don't worry, I'll kick anyone who gets too close."
"I definitely can't go anywhere without you to protect me."
He'd made her giggle. Adorable. She liked to seem all tough and aloof, but he had privileged, top-secret knowledge.
"C'mon kid!" Phil shouted up at them. "Get down here! There's a whole party down here waitin' for ya, and it can't start without its hero!"
"Are you ready?" Megara scratched the back of his neck, which made him shiver.
"Only if you are."
"I think I can handle this party if we take the occasional break."
"If I take a break with you, I might never return."
"Promise?"
"I'm as sure as I am that I'll have you screaming my name all night." He moved her off his shoulder so he could cradle her in one arm as he descended the stairs.
She instinctively looped an arm around his neck and kissed his cheek. "What if I return that favor?" she whispered.
"Then I'd be eternally grateful, but I promised first, and you know I always keep my promises."
"One of the many reasons I love you."
Hercules paused at the foot of the stairs to pull Megara into a passionate kiss right in front of the crowd of screamers. If there were a more definitive way to make his point, he'd have to think of it later.
"Yeah, all right, we get it, ya like yer girlfriend," Phil said when the round of supportive applause had ebbed away. "C'mon, we gotta show ya around to people who might wanna hire ya for yer services!"
Hercules rolled his eyes in Megara's direction and locked gazes with her. "Are you ready? I'm not going until you are."
"We can't stay up here forever. It's hot outside, and I'm getting thirsty."
Hercules's brows shot up, and he hustled through the crowd. "Anyone got something to drink?" He asked.
The question brought offers from many audience members who wanted to accommodate their hero, but Hercules politely declined most of them. A lucky vendor was selling chilled apricot juice.
"I'll give it to you for free because I can always tell people that the Mighty Hercules chose my stall!" the man exclaimed.
"Oh, thanks, uh, that's great!" Hercules handed Megara the cup without ever putting her down.
"Thanks to you, too, Wonder Boy. Seems like your reputation is worth your weight in gold."
"That's a lot of gold," Hercules snickered and kissed her on her cheek. "Drink that before it's warm."
"Yes, sir!" She sipped from the shallow cup as Phil hopped around, leading Hercules around to the important potential customers that had animated him so much.
Each new acquaintance addressed Hercules alone, but Hercules always made a point of saying, "And this is my fiancee, Princess Megara. She's the reason I'm here."
King Erginus of Orchomenos was not pleased to see a princess of Thebes literally on the new hero's arm, but he kept his lips tight as Phil gushed about how Hercules could help this neighboring king.
"If you're so thrilled to have my hero's services, you might want to reconsider that annual tribute," Megara told the king in her smoothest voice.
"Your hero?" Phil repeated in dismay.
"He's going to marry me soon," Megara reminded him.
"And I'll be yours forever," Hercules confirmed, nuzzling against her neck.
"The tribute was established fairly when we defeated you in war years ago!" Erginus protested.
"What tribute?" Hercules asked.
Megara traced his jaw and lightly brushed her thumb along his lower lip. "You see, Wonder Boy, we've had to pay a heavy fine to Orchomenos every year for the past twenty years. You can imagine how much of a burden it is when we've been suffering from so many disasters…" She rested her brow against his temple. "This guy has the nerve to show up here like he owns the place, and he can get you on his side whenever he wants to pay you with our money."
Hercules's jaw set in a firm line, and his muscles rippled under Megara. "Meg's terms are acceptable," he told King Erginus in a low, rumbling voice. "Before I accept any contract work from you, the tribute from Thebes ends, or I will personally reverse the victory you won twenty years ago and bring defeat down on your head."
Silence fell around them.
"You are… a new hero… you can't negotiate on behalf of the Theban crown!" The king protested.
Hercules sneered at him, then turned to kiss Megara again, just to prove a point. That didn't mean he couldn't enjoy it when Megara deepened the kiss in response. Her affection bolstered his assurance he was right. He returned his attention to the king, unimpressed. "Considering that I'm about to marry into the royal family, their debts are mine, and I don't take kindly to anyone who asks me to act against the interests of my family. If you want to pay back the entire tribute you demanded from Thebes in compensation for whatever it is you have planned, it's not owed to me but to the city itself."
"The entire tribute?" King Erginus gasped.
Megara played in his hair and smirked across at the king. "He's a hero, not a servant. He will decide which acts are righteous. Is that all you have for today? We have others to grace with our presence today."
"I'll talk to him," Phil promised the king.
"When you do, I'll remind you of how important loyalty has always been to me and any hero worth anything," Hercules replied and strode past Erginus without another word.
Another Boeotian king stood close by and approached them hurriedly. "I am Thespius of Thespiae," he said, making both Hercules and Megara snicker under their breath. "We have had some recent trouble with a massive lion… I could host you in our palace while you hunt the creature. Me and my fifty daughters–"
"Might not have space for us," Megara said. "But if you're fortunate enough to host us, I hope you remember that Hercules belongs to me, first and foremost. Are you capable of respecting that?"
Hercules sighed in joyful delirium and nuzzled against her. "Yeah… I belong to her, all right…"
"He has fifty daughters," Megara whispered to him. "There aren't enough princes in all of Greece, but I know what kings mean when they mention their daughters to a hero…"
"What?" Hercules twitched. "You don't mean…"
"Ya big ox, you're prime breeding stock. I should know."
He gagged over that comment and looked across at the second king in utter disgust. "Like I said, I belong to Meg… not your daughters. Meg belongs to me, too, and if I want to keep her happy– which I do– then everyone needs to know it, even if I have to tell each of your daughters to her face individually. Do we understand each other?"
"Yes," the tight-lipped king replied.
"About yer lion problem," Phil said, "Are ya willing to house me there instead, so I can… be there for the kid to report to?"
King Thespius frowned down at Phil. "A satyr in a palace?"
"He's housebroken," Megara said. "Just don't offer him anything in a clay vessel. He'll eat the vessel and leave the food."
"Watch it…" Phil turned to Megara, face going red. "That's the second–"
"Pitfall, she's helped me sidestep, yeah," Hercules said. "This stuff concerns my wife before it concerns you, so she gets the first word. I'll fight the lion, but my wife will be respected."
"I thought you said you weren't married yet," King Thespius said stiffly.
"Would it make a difference to you if we'd already undergone the formalities?" Megara crooned at the king from her perch. She cradled Hercules's cheek in one hand and wrapped her arm around his neck. "By the time he would've done your little errand, we'd be married, anyway. Don't act like you weren't trying to take Thebes's hero and use him for your own purposes. I met your daughters. Good luck figuring out what to do with them." She pulled Hercules close and kissed his cheek. "We should get out of here before he publicly embarrasses himself anymore."
"Good plan." Hercules abruptly turned away from this second king, approaching Menoikeus and the other princes.
"Meg, did you forget to walk or twist your ankle again?" Haemon asked when they got close enough.
"She's always had trouble with those ankles, but making fun of her hasn't worked yet," Menoikeus said, giving his brother a sharp glance of reproof.
Haemon shrugged.
"It could still work if we keep trying," Megarion said.
"Do you actually have weak ankles, or are they messing with you?" Hercules asked.
"Bit of both. I usually take it easy, so there's not much opportunity to test that."
"I'll always watch out for you to make sure you don't fall," Hercules promised, kissing her neck for emphasis. "But actually, guys, I'm carrying her because I like having her close, and if I let her stand, she'd be further away."
Megarion made a face like someone had snuck garlic into his dessert, but Haemon grinned and gave a thumbs-up of approval.
"I've already heard Orchomenus might withdraw their demands for annual tribute," Menoikeus said. "Whoever said Meg couldn't be a diplomat?"
Haemon and Megarion voluntarily raised their hands, and Haemon raised one for Menoikeus when he didn't do it himself.
"Guess you underestimated her," Hercules said. The hand that supported her rubbed her thigh affectionately. "I've made lots of mistakes, but I hope I never make that one."
"You're bound to, but you know how to apologize," Megara whispered, making him shiver.
He took her hand and brought it to his mouth. "If you three will excuse us, we made plans." He didn't wait for the line of raised brows to yield questions. "Hold on tight," he whispered to Megara. He whistled for Pegasus, who swept down to them in seconds. Hercules hopped aboard, keeping Megara in his lap and clinging to his neck as they flew away from the crowd.
Her hair trailed over his shoulder as she rubbed her cheek against his arm. "You're the best…" she whispered.
"Yeah? Have you noticed how many headaches you just saved me? You're the greatest thing to ever happen to me. How would I have talked my way out of that guy's plans when he'd hosted me for who knows how long looking for that lion? I'd get all tongue-tied and probably cry."
"My poor darling," she cooed over him and kissed along his jaw.
He pressed into each of her kisses but still noticed a trail of people that formed a crowd around their villa. "Uh… Meg? Incoming problem. What do we do about them?"
"Uh… avoid them at all costs?" Megara clung so tightly about his neck that her nails dug in. "Who gave them permission to–"
"Phil," they said together, a grim realization flooding over them that if they wanted privacy, they'd have to fight for it.
"Well, there's only one thing to do," Megara sighed.
"What's that?"
"Entertain them for maybe twenty minutes, then lock ourselves away…" She turned his face toward her for the full effect of her devious grin. "By then, the tension will be unbearable… we'll be desperate…"
Hercules tilted his head toward her and sighed in utter bliss. "Whatever you want…" he sucked lightly at a spot on her neck. "Maybe I can't wait that long, though. Can you? I want to hear you…"
"So we'd better get down there to start the timer."
Hercules brought Pegasus into a dive, his arm firm around Megara. "Sooner than you think."