Lives

Rain falls steadily on the sleeping ShadowClan camp. I press myself farther back into a clump of bushes by the entrance, tryin' to shake as much water from my fur as I can. Before my shift on guard duty, I spent almost the whole day battle training. Tigerstar oversaw our practice personally, makin' me fight Frogtail, Ratscar, Dawncloud, and Tallpoppy until all five of us were exhausted and scratched up.

My clanmates will wake up soon, and I got some time to rest before my sunhigh hunting patrol. I love knowin' what I'm sposed to do every day. It's peaceful, knowin' the decision's in some other cat's paws.

An owl hoots as I start washin' myself. I shiver, my brindled fur rufflin'. Mama used to say owls was bad omens. I've heard of 'em taking kits in the night.

Lightningkit's safe in the nursery, I remind myself. And Tangleburr's in there too, fixin' to have her first litter with Stumpytail. It's been a moon and a half since Tigerstar became leader, and ShadowClan is thriving. The evil Mama talked about in my dream has never seemed farther away. Even the memory of the dream is fading now.

I sit up straighter as pawsteps slosh toward the camp entrance. I unsheathe my claws and sink them into the muddy ground, ready to yowl a warning. For some reason I can't put my paw on, I'm convinced it's an enemy clan comin' to attack. Not that I got any reason to believe that. ThunderClan, WindClan, and RiverClan have had their squabbles in the past moon, but Tigerstar's kept us out of it. But menace hangs so thick in the night air, it reminds me of the smoke from the ThunderClan fire. My heart races as a huge shape looms out of the rainy darkness.

"All well in camp?" Tigerstar meows softly. I can't help it, I jump at the sound of his deep voice.

"Yeah, haven't seen nothin'."

It's only as our leader enters camp that I realize he ain't alone. Boulder slinks in behind him, his gray pelt dripping and his lean shoulders hunched. Despite the rain, both cats stink of hardblack, the sour reak of it oozing from their fur.

"Been patrollin' near the thunderpath?" I ask.

"Just a little scouting mission," Tigerstar says with a smirk.

Into ThunderClan territory? I wonder. Every cat in the clan knows he been meetin' with one of their warriors on the border. All he'll say about it is that it's good for ShadowClan to be aware of what's going on in the other clans. "What most cats would call spyin' when it's home in its nest washin' its paws," Mama would say.

Tigerstar shoulders past me and heads toward his den under the oak. Boulder starts to head off without saying a word, but I ain't havin' none of that.

"What's eatin' at you?" I ask, nudging him lightly. Then I cough, because he really does stink. The hardblack scent is way stronger than it should be if he just crossed the road to sneak into ThunderClan. And there's another cat's scent on him too, but the rain has mostly washed it away.

Before I can puzzle it out, Boulder jerks away, like I got the sickness and he be afraid of catchin' it. "I'm just tired, Nettlethorn. I gotta get some sleep." He does look tired, but he don't meet my eyes when he tells me so.

"It must be cool to be chosen for a special mission with Tigerstar," I say, pryin' at the edges of whatever he ain't tellin' me.

"Yeah, cool," Boulder says distantly. He shifts nervously from paw to paw, emanating fear-scent.

"Boulder, can I-"

"I'm fine! Don't need nothin' from you or any cat! And Tigerstar ordered me not to talk about it," Boulder snaps, and makes for the warriors' den like his fur's on fire. But as he walks away, his tail droops, and he flashes me a single look full of guilt and anguish.

I want to go after him, but my paws are rooted to the spot. Is this part of what Mama warned me about? I close my eyes, searchin' for the faintest whiff of her scent, any whisper of the wind that might be her voice. But there's nothing, just like there's been nothing since my dream. Mama, if there really is an evil in the forest and I'm not just jumpin' at shadows, you gotta tell me straight what it is and what I should look out for, I think for the tenth time.

"Tigerstar has chosen you three for tonight's Gathering," Blackfoot meows.

"Can't wait," I say, lookin' up from the thrush I'm sharin' with Nightwhisper. Jaggedtooth purrs around a mouthful of squirrel.

I didn't go to the last Gathering, but I got full reports from Jaggedtooth and Russetfur. Apparently Bluestar, the ThunderClan leader, is just about as crazy as the twoleg kits that run around the park in town. "That old fleabag should've retired to the elders' den moons ago," Russetfur meowed contemptuously. She entertained us for days with hilarious impressions of the addled ThunderClan leader.

Nightwhisper spits out a mouthful of feathers, looks around and meows quietly, "Somethin' weird happened when I was fixin' a hole in the elders' den this morning."

"What, did they not try to talk your fur off with some boring old story?" Jaggedtooth laughs.

"Ain't no need to be rude," I say, narrowing my eyes at the ginger tabby. I actually like hearin' stories about clan history.

Jaggedtooth starts to retort, but Nightwhisper lashes his tail. "Y'all wanna hear what happened or not?" he asks. Jaggedtooth and I nod.

My brother looks around again, makin' sure no cat's in earshot. "When I went in their den, Blizardwing—the old white tom with the torn ear—kept goin' on 'bout how much I look like this old ThunderClan leader."

Jaggedtooth rolls his eyes and demands, "How is that weird? If you've been alive since the beginning of time, every cat's gonna remind you of someone you knew way back."

"I guess," Nightwhisper says, flattening his ears. "But he kept sayin' he recognized my eyes."

My littermate and I trade a look that Jaggedtooth ain't part of. I didn't lie to Tigerstar when I said neither of us cares much about not knowin' our dad. But much ain't the same as not at all. In BloodClan, my brothers and I used to imagine our dad as some strong, noble cat who would rescue us from Bone and Scourge. When no such cat showed up and Mama got us out by her own wits and nerve, I decided dads are overrated.

I snort and roll my eyes. "Ain't no way our dad was a clan leader," I meow. Jaggedtooth and Nightwhisper laugh with me.

I get up, eager to see who else is coming to the Gathering. "We got picked!" Rowanpaw whoops, tackling his brother Cedarpaw.

I try to make eye contact with Boulder, but he quickly turns away and makes for the dirtplace. Ever since Tigerstar's little scouting mission, the gray tom's been avoiding me like I got every tick in the forest latched onto me.

"Be a frog-brain if that's what you feel like," I mutter irritably, deciding I'm tired of chasin' him. If Boulder wants to be friends again, he gotta come talk to me. Ain't gonna go beggin', am I?

Our patrol gathers behind Tigerstar and follows him out through the thorn tunnel. Our two newest warriors, Oakfur and Darkflower, stand on either side of me. Both of 'em look like they're fixin' to wriggle right out of their pelts, they're so excited. Darkflower's tail stands straight up like a kit's. For my part, I don't mind not being the most junior warrior no more.

"I'll scare all the clans out of their fur," Oakfur growls, springing forward over a fallen tree limb. Rowanberry purrs with laughter at her kits' antics.

No cat says it in so many words, but it's basically us and RiverClan against ThunderClan and WindClan. When we make it to Fourtrees, Tigerstar joins Leopardstar, who became RiverClan's leader after Crookedstar died last moon just like Boulder said, at the base of the Great Rock. With a flick of his tail, he summons Rowanpaw and Cedarpaw. They immediately begin tusslin with some RiverClan apprentices, showin' off for the leaders.

"Well done, Reedpaw, Primrosepaw," Leopardstar compliments her clanmates. Turning to Tigerstar, she adds, "Those are some strong young cats. You've done a good job."

"We've made progress, but there's still a long way to go," Tigerstar replies.

I lose track of the leaders' conversation as another cat bumps into me. "Sorry," the blue-gray warrior mutters. She smells of RiverClan, and after a few heartbeats, I recognize her as the one who attacked me during our second raid on ThunderClan.

"Sokay," I meow, hopin' she don't remember.

But she obviously does, because she says cooly, "You're one of the ro…. um, new ShadowClan warriors, aren't you?"

I grin, showin' my teeth in defiance. "My ears ain't gonna catch fire if you say rogues. I'm Nettlethorn." I emphasize my warrior name.

Her fur fluffs in embarrassment. So I reckon she ain't holdin' our battle against me too much. I guess warriors don't really do that, with clan alliances changin' like they do. "I didn't mean..."

I flick my tail. "I know where I was born. Ain't gotta hide the fact. It don't change what's inside me or how I serve my clan. My mama never set foot in the forest, but she was as brave as any warrior," I meow.

"If only it was that simple," the blue-gray she-cat mutters, almost too low for me to hear.

"What you mean?" I ask.

The RiverClan warrior shakes her head. "Nothing," she says with fake brightness. "Let's start over. My name's Mistyfoot. It's nice to meet you."

We talk casually for a few more minutes, mostly about patrols, toms, and Mistyfoot's new apprentice, Featherpaw. Near the end of our conversation, I become aware of the fact that Tigerstar's lookin' at us, with that same assessing, don't-miss-nothing gaze I remember from our first meeting by the filthy dumpster. No, it ain't me he got his eye on this time. He be lookin' at Mistyfoot like she's an especially juicy piece of fresh-kill.

"Looks like the leaders are gettin' ready to start. I'm gonna go find my clanmates," I meow. Mistyfoot waves her tail as I weave away through the crowd of gossiping cats.

Jaggedtooth calls my name, and I slip in between him and Nightwhisper. "Who were you talkin' to over there?" my brother wants to know.

"RiverClan warrior named Mistyfoot. She seems cool."

"I don't get why anyone would want to make friends in other clans when you'll just have to fight 'em one day," Jaggedtooth grumbles.

"Guess you'd better tell Tigerstar to stop chattin' with Leopardstar and that ThunderClan friend of his," I say dryly.

Tallstar's yowl brings the Gathering to order. WindClan's news is a whole lot of nothin' special. Tigerstar's speech starts out normal enough. He talks about our new training program and introduces Oakfur and Darkflower, to cheers from the other clans.

My ears prick up when he says, "I have a request to make." This oughtta be, to borrow a word I heard from Tigerstar himself not long ago, interesting.

"Many of you know," Tigerstar goes on, "that when I left ThunderClan, two kits of mine were in the nursery. They were too young then to travel, and I am grateful to ThunderClan for the care they've given them. But now it's time for them to join me in ShadowClan where they rightfully belong. Bluestar, I ask that you give me Bramblepaw and Tawnypaw." Great StarClan, that kit I saved from the fire's already an apprentice?

I search the clearing for the little Tigerstar lookalike, but he ain't here. The ThunderClan cats are screechin' fit to wake the dead. Tigerstar's request is apparently as much a surprise to my clanmates as it is to me, and opinions are mixed.

"We don't need half-clan kits, even if they are Tigerstar's," Deerfoot growls, to muttered agreement from Darkflower and Frogtail.

"The kits belong with their father," Blackfoot meows from his place beside the other deputies. Fireheart looks like a dog's gnawin' on his tail, and his claws scrape against the base of the stone.

"Why shouldn't Tigerstar's kits be raised in the strongest clan? They deserve to learn from him," Jaggedtooth calls.

"Their mama will have somethin' to say 'bout that, and I promise you, it ain't gonna be StarClan light your path," I retort. "She's done all the work of raisin' 'em since Tigerstar left." I certainly wouldn't put up with anybody takin' my babies away, not without the fight of their lives.

As the tumult dies down, Bluestar straightens up. I seen plenty of crazy in my life, but the ThunderClan leader looks sane as the next cat when she snaps, "Certainly not. These are ThunderClan kits. They'll stay where they belong."

"In ThunderClan?" Tigerstar sneers.

"Where else you think she means, twolegplace?" I whisper to my brother. He snickers but jabs me in the flank with a paw.

"I think not, Bluestar. The kits belong with me, and my warriors will take care of their training."

"Maybe I'll get to train one of Tigerstar's kits," Nightwhisper hisses breathlessly.

"ThunderClan ain't just gonna give us those kits. They'd be mouse-brained to do it. This'll be a war," I meow.

"You see war everywhere. How many times we had to fight since Tigerstar became our leader?" Nightwhisper says.

I shrug. "Seems like the kits should have a choice. If I were them and I was already an apprentice, I wouldn't wanna go live with strangers and start my training all over, is all I'm sayin'."

"Shhhhhhh, be quiet," Flintfang hisses, glaring at both of us.

On the Great Rock, Bluestar and Tigerstar are still arguin' about them kits. "The ThunderClan leader tells me how well my kits will be trained under her guidance. But ThunderClan has a poor record of looking after its young cats. One kit carried off by a hawk, one apprentice savaged to death, and another crippled when they were sent out alone without a warrior. Does any cat wonder that I'm concerned about the safety of my kits?"

"Great StarClan, that's terrible," Fernshade gasps, her eyes welling with sympathy. I rub my muzzle over my friend's cheek, knowing she's thinking of her own kit, killed in a battle with WindClan before he was six moons old.

While I'm comforting the tortoiseshell she-cat, the two leaders have come to an agreement. Bluestar's gonna think on Tigerstar's demand and get back to him at the next Gathering. Not that I think she'll change her mind, but hey, Tigerstar seems satisfied. The rest of the Gathering is anticlimactic.

I watch the ThunderClan warriors group up around Bluestar and Fireheart, getting ready to head home. Will I fight them again over Tigerstar's kits? And if so, how will that make ShadowClan stronger? Sure, we might get two new apprentices, but how many cats will we lose in the process? And do the kits even want to join us? It seems wrong to decide their fate without any input from them. Our fights are always about what Tigerstar wants—his vengeance, his kits—not because any cat is threatening ShadowClan as a whole. And the worst part is, I can't share these doubts with anyone. My brother and friends would call me disloyal. But my tongue feels heavy with all the words I'm keepin' inside.