An Invincible Summer by ShanaStoryteller

by CopyOthers

When Naruto was 5 he creates a ninjutsu, which he labels Oiroke no Jutsu. 3 days later, a civilian attacks and mortally wounds the boy after hearing that he was to begin his education as a ninja. When the ANBU arrive, there's so much blood that the status of the young boy is undeniable. 3 days later the body disappears. 6 months later Natsu Nami applies to enter the Academy.

4. Chapter 4

Tenten almost wants to laugh in their faces, because this is insane. But Neji thinks that she can do this. More importantly, he's asking her to do this. He never asks her for anything.

"Well?" Hanabi snaps, "Are you going to help or not?"

"Yes," she says, and she really hopes she doesn't end up getting beheaded for this or something. "But I can't just – poke around at a seal for a few minutes and figure out how to unravel it. That's Natsu's party trick, not mine."

"How long do you need?" the girl asks.

She sighs, "A day or two, at least, to reverse engineer it. I'd say a week, but it'll be a lot easier to track the chakra strings with the Byakugan. That's most of the work anyway. I also need someone with the Curse Mark who will let me poke around at them." Hinata and Hanabi glance at each other. Tenten knows that the only person in the Branch family they really talk to is Neji, so she's unsurprised when they both turn to her teammate.

Neji rubs his forehead, "I – yeah. I know some people."

The Branch family loves Neji. He's the talented prodigy of the Hyuuga clan, and he's theirs. Half the time Tenten thinks that Neji trains so hard so that he doesn't let them down.

"Great," she says with just as much enthusiasm as she feels, "let's get started."

---

Gaara has to admit that he has no one to blame but himself. She was his friend first, after all.

"She can't be serious," Temari says, scanning the letter.

Kankuro, who hasn't even gotten his hands on the letter yet, snorts. "Oh, I'm sure she is."

"This is insane," his sister insists. Gaara raises an eyebrow. She sighs, "What do you think?"

"Konoha may or may not support your ascension," he says clinically, "They are our biggest threat. If they go to war, we will have few allies. Kumo will fight with us, if for no other reason than they hate Konoha. Zabuza of the Seven Swordsman is no small ally, and if he and Natsu are successful and they pull off this coup – the Mizukage would be an invaluable friend to have in dark times."

Temari bites her bottom lip, "Do you think they'll win, though? This won't be the first time someone's tried to gain power in the Mist. I won't risk you if you don't think this is a battle you can win."

Her concern sends a rush of affection through him. He doubts he will ever tire of it. "Natsu specializes in the impossible," he says. "She has given me much, and asked for nothing in return. I would aid her, with your permission."

Temari looks to Kankuro. He shrugs, "I trust her judgement. She cares about Gaara too – she wouldn't risk him if she didn't think it was worth it."

She shakes her head and snaps her fingers, releasing a burst of wind chakra that shreds the letter. "Go. Stay strong, and stay safe."

Gaara kisses her quickly on the cheek, accepts a gruff hug from his brother, and gathers up the sand around him to take him as far as the desert's edge.

Once he's out of sight Kankuro says to his sister, "How are we going to cover up his disappearance?"

"We're not," she turns to him, "Punch me in the face."

He stares. "What?"

"Punch me in face," she repeats. "No one's going to believe we let Akatsuki take Gaara without a fight."

Kankuro gets it then, can picture how his sister's plan will unfold.

It takes him a long time to stop laughing.

---

Inuzuka dogs aren't like normal dogs. They're born with the ability to sense and manipulate chakra and a keen intelligence that allows them to communicate with their human partners. These aren't traits that come from good breeding, but instead from a centuries long positive relationship with the spirits. There was a time when Inugami, evil dog spirits fueled by rage and forced into slavery by foolish humans, ran rampant across the lands. The Inuzuka swore to fight off these spirits, and in return the spirits of the forest gave them the means to survive – companions who could understand them, fight for them, and die for them.

There hasn't been a report of Inugami in over a hundred years, but the spirits honor their bargain none the less.

So when the most recent litter born of two spotted tan dogs contains a pure white runt with clear green eyes, Tsume takes it a sign that there is a change on the wind, and she should prepare for it.

---

Kakashi hates this. It's stupid and suicidal and the most ridiculous thing he's heard in at least a week.

"I don't know why you're surprised," Kiba says to him as he glares at Zabuza.

"I'm not surprised," Sakura adds, "and I've only known her for a few months."

Sasuke doesn't say anything, but he can feel the youngest Uchiha's judgement from here.

"If it's any consolation," Zabuza says, "I was surprised. I'm with you, the kid's off his rocker."

It's of no consolation, in fact. He looks at the hunter-nin, Haku, and the pretty boy simply gives him a bland smile and says, "Having fought with Natsu in the past, even I'm aware this falls within a pattern of behavior."

He hates everything.

"If you're all done talking about me like I'm not here," Naruto says irritably, "I've gotten the letter of confirmation from Temari. Gaara should arrive tomorrow, and the bridge is set to be completed by the end of the week. Once that happens, you'll need to head back to Konoha. Without me."

"This is moronic," Kakashi snaps, "You're an A rank chunin and our only seal master. The council will label you an S Rank missing-nin, and you'll end up dodging Anbu teams your entire way to Kiri. It's suicide."

Zabuza looks up from where he's comfortably sprawled in the grass, "He's got a point, kid."

Kakashi would feel a lot better if the Demon of the Mist would stop agreeing with him, actually.

Naruto shakes his head, and with a pulse of chakra Natsu is standing in front of them. "Natsu Nami is an A ranked chunin seal master. She is worth a high bounty, and the expense of sending Anbu out to capture. Naruto Uzumaki, however," she shifts again, and Naruto grins back out at them, "is presumed dead, and if he's alive – well, he never even attended the Academy. As Naruto, I'm officially just a civilian. No one's going to give a shit about a Konoha civilian traveling through Water."

"Okay, so you'll be able to travel unnoticed," Sakura says, "but what about Natsu? People are going to notice fast when you don't come back with us."

The smile drops off Naruto's face, "Ah, this is the less fun part of the plan. So when you guys go back to Konoha, you're going to tell everyone the truth – that Zabuza ran me through on his sword, and I died on it."

"Absolutely not," Kakashi snarls.

Kiba growls, "I'm not fucking telling my sister you're dead!"

Sasuke raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. Even Haku winces.

"That's cold," Zabuza nods, "I like it."

"Look," Naruto placates, "it's the only way that I can help Kiri without the Council putting a bounty on my head. And even if they didn't think I was worth the money, the fact is I can't do this as a ninja of the Leaf. If we fail, I won't let the backlash reach Konoha."

Sakura glares, "You can't just fake your own death!"

Naruto shrugs and spreads his hands out, "Why not? I've done it before."

"Why don't we have your body?" Kiba demands, "Kakashi-sensei's high level enough to perform a stasis and a seal. If you'd died, we'd have brought you home."

"Mutilation," Haku offers, "If Master Zabuza had hacked her up enough, it would have been kinder to simply burn her remains here. Ashes are easy enough to fake."

Naruto points to Haku, "What he said."

Kakashi crosses his arms, "I don't like this."

"Nobody like this," Naruto says, "but I made a promise, and I'm sticking to it. This isn't just for me or to honor my deal. Sand is an uneasy ally at best, their Kazekage is fucking nuts, and Mist is one huge mess. Ever since Uzushiogakure fell the whole Land of Water has been one huge mess. If I can fix these things, and make them allies of Leaf in the process, this will change everything. For the better."

Kiba squints, "It's really fucking annoying when you're logical and insane at the same time."

"It's a gift," Naruto grins, "Now, Team Seven, get back to guarding the bridge. That's an order."

"What are we even guarding it against?" Sakura gripes, "Zabuza and Haku are on our side now, Gato is dead, and all his former employees are too scared of you to even think of attacking."

"Don't question orders," Naruto says, "Get to it."

Kiba and Sakura roll their eyes, but disappear in a swirl of leaves. Sasuke sighs, "I really don't like letting you go off on your own."

"I won't be on my own," he says, "I'll be with Zabuza and Haku and Gaara."

Sasuke pokes Naruto's forehead, and the blonde's face goes blank with shock. "Even still," he says before body flickering away.

Naruto hesitantly reaches for his forehead, and the smile that spreads across his face threatens to break it in half.

"You two are disgusting," Zabuza says, heaving himself up and swinging his sword across his shoulders, "Come on Haku, let's go train. We're going to go overthrow Kiri, after all."

"Of course, Master Zabuza," Haku says, and when the older man holds out a hand to pull him to his feet, Haku's smile is nearly as blinding as Naruto's.

Once they're alone, Naruto turns to Kakashi, "All right Niichan, let's hear it."

"This is a stupid plan and I don't like it," he answers, well aware he sounds like he's five and not caring in the slightest.

Naruto rolls his eyes and sends a burst of chakra to his feet to flip up onto Kakashi's shoulders. He leans and pushes himself up so he's balancing on his fingertip on top of the jounin's head, "It's a good plan, and you know it. Otherwise, genius that you are, you'd come up with a better argument than it's stupid."

"If you die I'll lose my mind," he answers instead, his throat tight, "You're my sensei's son and my little sister and if you don't return to me I will go to Kiri and raze it to the ground myself."

Naruto lowers himself enough to plop a kiss on top of Kakashi's head, "You worry too much, Kakashi-niichan. I'm a jinchuuriki. It takes a lot to kill me."

For the first time, the demon sealed inside of Naruto is more of a comfort then Kakashi wants to admit.

---

Hating the Akatsuki is easy. Madara helped him kill their clan and the rest of them want to find his best friend and tear the demon from her stomach. He hates only three things, really – Danzo, the man that leered at Natsu when she was ten years old, and Akatsuki.

"Hey," Kisame says, ducking back into their room. He's got breakfast for two in his hands.

He has tried very, very hard to hate the Kiri missing-nin over the past four years. It's proving difficult.

"Hmm," he answers, accepting the rice balls. He'd say thank you, but that doesn't fit in with his current persona, and also Kisame has a pile of fatty, sugary pastries stacked in front of him for his first meal of the day. In spite of witnessing this very thing every day since they become partners, he still wants to lecture him about blood sugar and nutrition. Not forcing Kisame to eat a proper fucking meal for once in his life under threat of Mangekyo is as close to gratitude as he gets these days.

Dear god, he's becoming his mother.

The thought makes his chest seize, and if he was alone he'd reach under his cloak and grasp at the necklace he has worn faithfully every day since the Massacre.

"So, I heard some rumors today while I was at the market," Kisame says. The raspberry jam smeared all over his face is comical against his blue tinted skin. "Did we capture the one tailed demon? Are you hiding him in a storage scroll or something? Did I black out from too much to drink?"

Itachi has actually never seen Kisame consume so much as an ounce of alcohol, but he's so thrown for a moment that he has to wonder if the other ninja is drunk at this very moment. "What?"

"Rumor on the street is that we captured the one tails," he repeats calmly, "As far as I remember, the last time we saw that kid and your BFF-"

"Please stop referring to the nine tailed demon container like that," Itachi sighs. He knows the other man says it as a joke, but to hear it said so plainly is disconcerting. There was a time when every ninja in Konoha associated him and Natsu together.

There was also a time when there were more than a handful of Uchiha left to walk the earth. Best not to think on it, really.

"Whatever," he snorts, "Anyway, the last time we saw them we got our asses handed to us and a very uncomfortable one way ticket to my old stomping grounds. So I don't think we captured the one tails, but everyone else seems to think so."

"Hm," he answers. So the red headed boy is missing. He'd say kidnapped, but if someone is trying to give them credit for the capture then it's unlikely. Unless they're trying to throw the investigation off their scent, which would only make sense if they were in Suna, or someone closely connected to it –

Itachi puts down his half-finished rice ball, suddenly no longer hungry.

Somehow, someway, he's certain that this is Natsu's fault.

---

Gaara shows up two days later than expected, just as the bridge is being finished. Team Seven and Naruto are helping clean up the last of debris when that familiar chakra appears so close so quickly that he must have been cloaking it.

The boy is the most even tempered person Naruto knows, except maybe Iruka, so when the redhead marches up to him, scowling, he has to fight the urge to hide behind Kakashi.

"Gaara!" he grins, "Have a nice trip?"

"I," he growls, "am sweating."

Naruto blinks. There are in fact beads of perspiration peppering the genin's skin. "Yes?"

"I hate sweating," he crosses his arms.

Naruto opens his mouth, then closes it. Finally he says, "… you live in a desert?"

"A dry desert," he snarls, "this humidity is awful."

"You do know we're going to the Land Hidden in the Mist, right? It's only going to get worse."

Gaara's face drops, "I changed my mind, conquer Kiri on your own. It's not worth it."

"Gaaaaaaaaaara," he whines, throwing his arms around the other boy's neck, "You promised!"

"Who's this?" Sasuke asks.

Naruto blinks. Sasuke had been on the other side of the bridge a moment ago. "This is Gaara!" he beams, ignoring the redhead's attempt to break out of his embrace.

"Natsu, you're a damn heater," he whines, "please let go."

Humidity makes Gaara cranky. This is hilarious.

"It's actually Naruto again," he says, and it's his name, it's the name his parents gave him, that the Yondaime gave him (and isn't that a weird thought). It hasn't been his name in a long time, though. He'll get used to it again. He wants to get used to it, now that he knows it was picked out with care by people who loved him and not at the whim of some orphanage administrator.

The women in the Flower District called him Sunflower. He thinks he might always like that one best of all.

"Hold on!" Sasuke glares, "He knew about you before we did? You trusted him, but not us?"

Naruto waves his arms, "No, no, no! I haven't told anyone! It was kinda the same circumstances, it happened while I was fighting Itachi!"

Gaara yanks on the end Naruto's ponytail. This is why he always used to keep it in a bun. "You almost died again? How many near death experiences do you have a month?"

Sasuke snorts. Gaara rolls his eyes, like he should have known better than to ask. The two genin look at each other and trade commiserating smiles.

On one hand, at least neither of them are yelling at him. On the other, he wishes their point of bonding wasn't how reckless he is.

"This," Kiba says, suddenly right next to them with an arm around Sakura's shoulders, "is Gaara of the Sand. He's the jinchuuriki Naruto made friends with during his chunin exam."

"That really happened?" Sakura demands. "I thought Kiba was messing with me!"

Gaara nods, "I though Naruto was quite insane at the time." He pauses, "Still do, in fact."

Naruto rolls his eyes, "All right everyone, back to work. The sooner we get this finished, the sooner we can all leave."

"Considering you're going off on what basically amounts to a suicide mission, that's not really great motivation," Kiba says.

He smiles sweetly, "Do it or I'll beat you all up. How's that?"

Team Seven salutes and then gets to work. Naruto would feel better about that if he didn't think they were laughing at him.

He nudges Gaara, "You too, you need the practice."

The redhead frowns, "But – the sand."

"There's lots of it," he points outs. They're on a sea coast. Of course there's lots of it.

"It's wet," he spits out.

Naruto pats his shoulder and doesn't laugh at him, "The sand in Kiri will be wet too. You should practice using it now."

Gaara pouts in a way very unbecoming of a fearsome ninja warrior, and it reminds Naruto so much of when Gaara was a kid that he ruffles his hair.

A pouting, cranky Gaara with hair sticking up every which way is the best.

---

Haku is out gathering herbs. Or at least that's what he told Zabuza, and Zabuza is sure the boy will in fact go and do that – as soon as he comes back from the city's center and running his hands over hair ribbons and makeup, like he always does.

He already goes around in a pink, flowery kimono. Zabuza doesn't give a shit what he does with his face or his hair. He could probably actually tell this to Haku, but then he'd have to talk about his feelings. Talking about his feelings makes him break out in hives.

Which is probably why he feels faintly itchy with Kakashi sitting across from him at the table and glaring.

"Cake?" he offers, holding up his plate. It's the last piece of carrot cake. He'll cut Kakashi before he gives it up.

Then again, he's pretty sure Haku got the recipe. Would it be weird if he asked Haku to make him cake?

Probably.

"No," Kakashi says coldly. Well, good. He hadn't wanted to share anyway.

He sighs and leans back in his chair, "I'll watch out for your brat, okay? I'm not going to throw him at the Mizukage and run."

"You already killed him once," Kakashi points out.

He shrugs, "Well yeah, we were enemies. Now we're not."

Kakashi raises an eyebrow.

"Look, considering the company the kid keeps it's in my best interest to keep him alive, all right? But we're going off to start a war, Kakashi. This won't be pretty."

The jounin slumps in his chair, and it's kind of hard to tell under the mask but Zabuza is almost certain the other man is pouting. He looks like he should have a raincloud hovering over him. Maybe he should have shared his cake.

Nah.

---

Fuuinjutus is hard, and this seal is stupid complicated. Thankfully, taking something apart is always easier than building it in the first place.

"Are you sure you can do this?" Hanabi asks, eyes and tone sharp. The little girl is like the personification of a kunai.

"No," Tenten says honestly.

Lee throws his arms in the air, "You can do this! The flames of youth burn brightly inside you!"

It's probably a little messed up that that's comforting.

Neji places a soft hand on her shoulder, "I believe in your skill and your strength. You can do this."

"And if you fuck up, we're right here," Kabuto adds cheerfully. Hana elbows him in the side. "Ow!"

"The less they've used the Byakugan, the less damage there is," Hana reminds kindly, "Neji was probably the most complicated healing we'll do. So don't worry – if anything goes wrong, we'll be here."

Tenten swallows and looks at the kid hanging off of Neji's hand. He's nine, a year younger than Hanabi, and just about to start training with the blacksmith in the market. Isamu has never activated the Byakugan, and so he's the perfect first subject. "You're okay with this?" she asks him.

Isamu looks up to Neji, and the older boy smiles at him. He looks back to Tenten, "Neji asked me and my parents already. If he thinks it's a good idea, we trust him."

Tenten knows that Hanabi hadn't been thinking this when she'd first asked Neji for help, but she wonders if the girl knows that by holding Neji's loyalty she now holds the loyalty of every Branch family member.

Judging by the look on her face, if she didn't before, she does now.

"Okay," she says softly, "C'mere."

Isamu squeezes Neji's hand one more time before letting go. Tenten kneels in front of the boy and carefully unwinds the bandages around his forehead. Chakra sparks against her fingers, and the seal shimmers to life in front of her, the complicated lines and locks that exist under the skin.

Natsu had unraveled Neji's seal in under a minute, but she's not Natsu Nami. There's one line in all this mess that she could hit and get rid of it all once, like a loose string in a knot, but she doesn't know where it is or how to find it. Instead she has to unweave the warped and clinging chakra strings from each other separately. Natsu had burned them off as she'd went, but Tenten doesn't have anything close to the amount of chakra she'd need to do that. So the threads of chakra are still attached, and they get knotted up in each other all over again while she takes another section apart. The chakra that had made up the seal finally dissolves away once she's taken it all apart. All in all, it takes over an hour.

That was a fair amount of chakra that just fizzled away. If there was a way to harness that – well. She has a couple of ideas.

"How do you feel?" Kabuto asks Isamu, hands lighting green.

He blinks. "Tingly."

"Only minor nerve damage," Kabuto diagnosis, the healing chakra sweeping up and down the boy's body.

Tenten doesn't even realize she's listing to the side until Neji wraps an arm around her and steadies her against him. "Are you okay?" he asks intently.

She nods, and normally she'd be too embarrassed to give in to her desires like this, but she's tired. "M'fine," she murmurs, curling into the solid heat of Neji's chest. Her teammate stiffens, and she's about to force herself to pull away when he reaches under knees and lifts her up, holding her in his arms. "Neji?" she blinks up at him.

"Go to sleep," he says, flushed red and not looking at her, "You did well, Tenten. I'm proud of you."

Her mouth goes slack, but then she's grinning. She throws an arm around Neji's neck and drifts off to the sound of Neji's heart beating in her ear.

---

They're all packed and ready to go their separate ways, standing at the Natsu Nami Bridge (named for the kunoichi who died for it, ha). There's just one thing he needs to teach them first.

"This is a secret," Naruto emphasizes, "I figured this out a couple of years ago, and I wasn't going to tell anyone. This is the secret I was definitely taking to my grave. But things are going to get a little rocky from here on out, so I want you all to have this in your back pocket if you need it."

"Awesome," Kiba says with all the enthusiasm of a popped balloon.

He points at Zabuza and Haku, "I'm especially talking to you two. If Kiri shinobi start doing this, I'll know who they learned it from, and then I will march back into Mist and kill all of you. Got it?"

Haku nods and Zabuza snorts. Naruto's choosing to take that as agreement,

"So you all know about Shadow Clones, right?" he asks.

"That's what you did on the bridge," Sakura says, "They're a solid clone, but they're a huge chakra drain."

"Right," he says, "Why?"

Sasuke shrugs, "Because you have to split your chakra up, and they can only take one hit. So if you make one clone, that's half your chakra gone in one punch. If you make ten, that's ninety percent of your chakra gone. It's almost never worth the risk."

Naruto nods, "But what if you could make it so that chakra you split up doesn't disappear, but instead comes back to you? So instead of losing all your chakra, you just lose the initial small amount it had taken to form the clone in the first place?"

"That'd be some crazy shit," Zabuza says thoughtfully, "One ninja could become a whole army. Shit, someone who's kage level could send battalions of themselves out into a village, and desecrate it without ever putting themselves or their ninja in danger."

"You didn't," Kakashi says with all the calm he doesn't feel, because he's seen what Naruto can accomplish with some paper and ink, and he's very certain that he did.

Naruto rubs the back of his head, "This can't get out, okay? It will revolutionize warfare, and not for the better. Understand?"

"You're fucking with me," Zabuza says, "No fucking way."

Naruto digs his nail into his skin (thank fuck for nin-polish) and lightly carves the whirlpool symbol into the flesh of his arm, the same one that's stitched onto every Konoha flak jacket. "It's simple really, you just add in the re-circulation symbol, and channel the chakra through that symbol before initiating the Ram," the bloody symbol briefly flares with chakra before Naruto forms the Ram. There are then three Narutos in front of them. "Then that way the redistribution symbol is copied into the clone," all of them say at once, holding out their arms to show they share the identical sigil, "so when they disperse," Naruto punches both of his clones, and they disappear in a poof of smoke, "all the remaining chakra comes back to you." He throws out his arms, "Tada!"

"So what you're saying," Haku says, excitement shining in his eyes, "is that you and me and Gaara and Zabuza, who combined have the chakra of roughly eight kages, can march literal armies of ourselves into Kiri."

"Pretty much," Naruto grins, "Isn't this plan at least a little less insane now?"

"Naruto," Gaara rubs at his forehead, "I am, as always, grateful that we fight on the same side."

"Imagine, for a moment," Sasuke says serenely, "if Danzo had actually wanted to use Natsu as weapon of mass destruction."

Sakura whistles, "Yikes."

"A creative and vicious opponent," Zabuza grins. He throws his sword onto his back, "All right, we're wasting daylight. I want to be out of this dumb village by nightfall."

Everyone's mood dampens. Sakura and Kiba don't hesitate to pull Naruto into a fierce hug. "Be careful, and come home," Kiba says fiercely.

"Stay strong, and stay safe," Sakura whispers, wiping at her eyes when they finally let go of him.

Kakashi's hand falls heavy on top of Naruto's head, "Raze it to the ground," he reminds pleasantly, "and if I do that, Iruka will be cross with me."

"Well, we can't have that," Naruto grins, "I'll be home as soon as I can." Kakashi tugs on the end of his ponytail, and that gives Naruto an idea. "Hold on," he shifts into Natsu, and grabs a kunai from her pouch. She briefly mourns, because she's spent years of her life growing this hair, but it's the least she can do. She undoes her ponytail and cuts off about two feet of her pale, ash colored hair so what's left falls to right below her shoulders. She shifts back to Naruto, but the hair in his hands remains the color of Natsu's and not his own. He ties it off and hold it out to Kakashi, "If I was really dead, you'd bring something home."

Kakashi gently takes the hair and places it in his pack, "A lot of people are going to be upset by this, you know."

"I know," he swallows, "but this is important."

Kakashi sighs, and even with the mask covering two thirds of his face it's easy to see how sad the jounin is in this moment. It almost makes Naruto want to throw all his plans out the window.

The he turns to Sasuke, and the Uchiha is solemn in way that reminds Naruto's of the years after the massacre. "Hey," Naruto says, forcing a smile, "it's only temporary."

"Unless it's not," Sasuke says evenly, "Now both you and my brother are off roaming the elemental nations."

"It'll be okay," Naruto says, and he has nothing to back him up on that, but it's what he's been saying for years and he's been right so far, "I'll come back, Sasuke. I promise."

He doesn't know when either of them moved, but somehow they're close enough that Naruto can see the hints of blue hiding in Sasuke's dark eyes.

"I'm holding you to that," the genin says softly.

Zabuza snorts and Haku says, "This is ridiculous," right before Naruto feels the missing-nin elbow him in the back.

He stumbles a half step forward, knocking into Sasuke. The other boy catches him around the waist, and then they're kissing. It's painfully awkward for a moment, teeth clacking together, but Naruto shifts his head and puts his arms around Sasuke's neck to pull him closer. It's softer then, the both of them moving against each other like they're made of glass. They part, and Naruto rests his forehead against Sasuke's. "Hey," he says, grinning.

"Hey," Sasuke answers, flushed and as happy as Naruto has ever seen him.

Kiba makes a vomiting sound behind them, "Oh my god, please stop. I feel like I'm watching my parents make out."

Naruto drops his head on Sasuke's shoulder. Sakura smacks Kiba upside the head, and Sasuke says, "I hope you remember I'm stronger than you, and I will hurt you later."

Naruto laughs and ducks forward to kiss Sasuke one more time before moving over to the Kiri shinobi and Gaara. "I'll see you soon," he tells them all, trying not to laugh at how Kakashi is glaring daggers at the youngest Uchiha.

He turns and walks in the direction of Kiri, and tells himself that walking away from Sasuke is far from the hardest thing that he's ever done. That would be ridiculous.

---

After the third day of neither of the Hyuuga sisters turning up, Kurenai looks to Shino and says, "Should I be worried?"

Shino raises an eyebrow.

"Don't give me that look," she says, "I know you know what they're doing."

"They haven't told me anything," he sniffs.

Kurenai rolls her eyes, "I'm sure they haven't. You still know anyway. I'm trusting you three about what's going on, whatever the hell it is. But you absolutely know."

Shino may or may not have used his bugs to spy on the sisters from day one. With their byakugan they definitely know, and haven't said anything, so he's taken it as permission.

"I maybe know," Shino concedes. "Do you want me to go check up on them?"

"Please," she sighs, "then feel free to take the weekend off. We have a mission on Monday, and all three of you better show up to that or I'll beat some damn punctuality into all of you."

"Yes, Kurenai-sensei," he says, and one corner of his mouth ticks up, which is basically the same as laughing.

He body flickers to the Forest of Death, right in between Hinata and Hanabi. "How many do you have left?" he asks, watching Neji and Lee standing at Tenten's shoulders as she yanks hard at the Curse Mark of another branch member, unraveling the seal. "She's gotten better at that."

"Her time is down to under three minutes a seal," Hinata reports, "We're almost done. There are one hundred and thirteen Branch members carrying the Curse Mark, and we have removed eighty six of them." Her smile dims, "Kabuto and Hana assessed them, and there are seven who are too old or have used the byakugan too long to have the Curse Mark removed safely."

"Three of them have had the seal since beginning, ever since the Main branch began putting the Curse Mark on the Branch family sixty years ago. They're artisans, have never bent chakra in their lives. We're hoping Nami will be able to unravel the marks," Hanabi adds, not taking her eyes away as the Branch member hobbles over to Hana, and the woman's hands light green as she repairs the damage. "Tenten is quite accomplished at sealing, but she's not a master."

"If Natsu can't do it, no one can," Shino agrees. He frowns as he considers Team Nine. "What's Gai think of all this?"

"Officially, he doesn't know what we're doing," Hanabi says dryly, "He took a mini training vacation and gave them all two weeks off. He hasn't actually left the village, so I'm assuming he's doing more for the sake of plausible deniability than anything else."

"Hmm," he nods, "Team Ten?"

"We haven't told them anything," Hinata says.

"But," Hanabi continues, "if Shikamaru hasn't figured the whole thing out by now, I'll be very disappointed in him."

He doesn't say anything to that, but he's content to stand between his teammates and help them keep watch over their people.

When he'd been put on a team with the Hyuuga heirs, he'd just been planning on surviving them. This is better.

---

"So," Kiba says when they're a half day from the Konoha border, "we're not actually going to tell everyone that Natsu is dead, right?"

Kakashi stares, "Of course we are."

"No, I mean obviously the hokage and the civilians and all of them," he flaps a hand, "but Hana and Kabuto will launch a revenge mission. Inoichi will head an investigation into her death. Anko will kill someone. Team Ten will hunt us down and kill us."

Sakura taps her chin, "He does have a point. If we tell them the lie, they'll look into Natsu's death because she's their friend. If they dig hard enough, they might find out the truth. Then we're screwed."

Kakashi had actually been a little worried about that, mostly because if Natsu had actually died he might have lost his mind a little, and he doesn't actually relish the idea of both Iruka and Gai sitting on him in an attempt to stop him from doing something stupid, "So to protect the secret, we have to tell the secret."

"Exactly," Kiba nods, pleased with himself.

"This has nothing to do with your inability to lie to either your mom or your sister, of course," Sasuke smirks.

Kiba throws a shuriken at the Uchiha's head, but doesn't deny it.

A mile outside of the village they blank out their faces, and Kakashi doesn't even acknowledge the wall guard.

"Kakashi," the hokage greets, smiling. Iruka is beaming at his side, and god, his boyfriend is going to kill him for this later. "It's good to have you back." He frowns, "Where's –"

Kakashi, stone-faced, reaches into his back and slams a plain urn and Natsu's ponytail onto the hokage's desk. The old man pales. "Chunin Natsu Nami was killed in the line of duty," he reports tonelessly, "She fell to the Kiri missing-nin, Zabuza." He throws down a file, "This is my report."

Iruka has his hand over his mouth, but his eyes are on the genin. Sakura is red eyed and pressed against a scowling Kiba's side. Sasuke's face is as emotionless as his own.

"Kakashi," the Sandaime says softly.

"Permission to be dismissed," he snaps.

The hokage looks at him with sad, old eyes, and god, he couldn't lie like this for anyone but Naruto. "Permission granted."

They all body flicker out of there. He goes to his apartment and summons Pakkun. "I've got an important job for you," he says. The pug looks unimpressed.

If everyone's following the plan, his genin are sending shadow clones out to retrieve and replace certain genin and two chunin and are meeting in the Uchiha district under a chakra cloak.

He digs around in his cabinet for a bottle or five of sake, because in a few minutes a bunch of very confused and pissed off jounin are going to be in his kitchen, and there is quite simply not enough alcohol in the world for the conversation they're about to have.

Iruka comes storming before any of them, Natsu's ponytail in his fist, and he figures the other man's anger is justified. If he'd actually let Natsu die, he'd deserve it.

"Iruka," he starts.

The chunin whips chakra around them, erecting a privacy barrier in moments that takes most jounin about five minutes to set up. "Don't you lie to me Kakashi Hatake," he snarls. "Natsu's not dead."

His mouth drops open, "How-"

"Because if Natsu had died and you'd brought back her hair," Iruka flings the ponytail on the counter, "it would be yellow, and your report would be far thicker. Actually, there'd be no report, because you'd kill the hokage and go on the run, and then I'd have to go on the run after you, and do you know who would be left in charge if we both left? Danzo. So I know Natsu's not dead because Konoha is still standing."

"Yellow," Kakashi repeats numbly, "you knew."

Iruka flushes and rubs the bridge of his nose, "I suspected."

"How?" he demands. Iruka had never even met Minato or Kushina as far as he knew. How did he figure it out when Kakashi hadn't?

He sighs and falls into the stool at their counter, "The hokage lifted my ban two weeks before he was set to lift anyone else's because Naruto was going to be in my class. So I started following Naruto around, just to get a read on him. He was a depressed, lonely, neglected kid who spent more time in Flower District of Konoha than anywhere else, because the women there didn't always have time for him but they were never cruel to him. They at least understood what it felt like to be unfairly discriminated against. The one house Naruto seemed to spend all his time at was-"

"Madame Koi's," Kakashi finishes, because that's the Madame who Natsu credited with her training and who she visited on off mornings. He'd watched Naruto as a kid, he'd known that he'd spend his days in the Flower District, god he was so stupid –

"Hey," Iruka grabs at his hand, "Don't do that to yourself. It was just a hunch."

"You stumbled over her name when you first met her," he says, recalling that day in the mission assignment office, "You almost called her Naruto."

"If I was wrong, then I'd look like an idiot," he says reasonably, "and if I was right, then Naruto had died to be given the chance to be Natsu. I wasn't going to take that away from her."

Just when he thought he couldn't love Iruka more than he already does. He tugs down his mask and kisses Iruka just like he's been gone for over a month and he nearly lost one of his most precious people and like Iruka is the type of amazing, caring person that Kakashi didn't think he's ever be able to find.

"Excuse me," Inoichi says acidly, and Kakashi jerks his mask back up before turning to face the five jounin in his kitchen. "But what hell happened?" His eyes catch on Natsu's hair, and he has to swallow before he can spit out, "Is Natsu really dead?"

Shikaku and Chouza are stand on either side of Inoichi, Anko is leaning against his wall with her arms crossed, and Gai is there too. Gai knows him though, knows he wouldn't be making out in his kitchen if Natsu were gone.

"You can't tell anyone this," he says, "Not the hokage, not your wives, not your comrades, not you kids – well, actually, you can tell your kids because they're being told the same thing right now. But this is a secret from everyone, do you understand?" he looks them each in the eye, "Natsu's life depends on."

At the confirmation she's still alive Inoichi has to lean on the counter to keep from falling over, but he smiles wide in relief. "I understand," he says. The other jounin nod in agreement.

Kakashi glances at Iruka before throwing out, "Natsu Nami is also Naruto Uzumaki. He's been using that name and a genjutsu fueled ninjutsu to alter his appearance for eight years."

Inoichi's mouth drops open, "What the fuck?"

"Hm," Shikaku examines his nails, "shocking."

Chouza looks to the ceiling, "Who would have guessed?"

"That explains a lot, actually," Gai admits.

Anko shrugs, "Cool."

Inoichi whirls around to face his teammates, "You knew?"

"I know everything," Shikaku says, and Inoichi wants to punch him in the face, because it's just as annoying now as when they were kids.

"Know is such a strong word," Chouza protests, "I wouldn't say know. Assumed. Wondered. Postulated."

"I'll hit you," Inoichi threatens.

"You can try," the other man allows.

Shikaku turns to Chouza, "How did you figure it out? I didn't know that you knew, actually."

"I told you both," he shakes his head at his teammates, "Natsu nearly out ate me at the ramen stand back when she was in the Academy. The only person who's ever been able to do that is –"

"Kushina Uzumaki," everyone says at once.

"Exactly," he grins, "that shit's genetic, and Kushina and Naruto were the only Uzumakis in Konoha. So Natsu was, probably, Naruto."

Inoichi glares, "And you didn't say anything?"

He shrugs, "It's none of my business if a citizen of Konoha wants to change their gender or go by a different name."

"True," Inoichi says through gritted teeth, "except for the small fact that this citizen is THE JINCHUURIKI OF THE NINE TAILED FOX."

"She's a seal master," Gai points out, "It's not like the fox is getting out unless she lets it out."

"Would it have changed how you treated her?" Shikaku asks.

Inoichi throws his hands up, "Yes!" He pauses and considers that. Shikaku and Chouza keep their faces blank, which means they're judging him. He's never agreed with the people that outright abused the boy, but he'd had some pretty unfair feelings about Naruto and the other containers that hadn't really gone away until about six months into Natsu's friendship with Gaara. "All right," he says grudgingly, "you made the right decision. I'm still pissed about it."

"None of this," Shikaku says, "explains why Natsu has faked her own death again. This seems a pretty extreme way to get away from Danzo."

"Oh, this has nothing to do with Danzo," Kakashi says brightly. "We really did fight against Zabuza of the Seven Swordsman and his partner, Haku. Naruto made a truce by offering to help them wage a war against Kiri, make Zabuza the mizukage, and kill the majority of the royal family of the Land of Water."

Anko chokes. Gai pounds on her back, which sends her stumbling into Chouza.

"What," Shikaku says flatly.

Iruka rubs at his temples as if warding off a headache. Inoichi flings out his hand, and Kakashi agreeably places the bottle of sake into it. The clan head starts chugging.

"Anything interesting happen while I was gone?" Kakashi asks.

Gai taps his chin, "Well, Hinata and Hanabi decided that instead of trying to detangle the chakra knot blocking Hinata's gate it would be easier to remove the Curse Mark off of every Branch member instead. Hiashi hasn't found out yet."

Inoichi coughs and spits out the sake. Kakashi can't even bring himself to be mad about it.

"I didn't know that either," Shikaku frowns. He turns to Chouza, "I think I'm losing my touch."

"If it helps, I'd bet money on your son knowing about it," the Akimichi head offers.

Kakashi regrets coming home. Konoha burning to the ground or not, he should have gone with Natsu. Starting a war with Kiri seems like it would be better for his blood pressure.

---

So they hadn't actually cleared telling Teams Eight and Nine about Naruto, but Kiba had made the executive decision to tell them because if they didn't tell Hanabi, when she found out that they didn't tell her later she'd kill them. And Hanabi will tell Hinata who will tell Shino and she'd tell Neji who'd tell his teammates, and the point is that it's just easier to cut out the middle man.

Which leaves them with all the other genin plus Hana and Kabuto looking at them dumbfounded when they finish explaining about Naruto.

Kabuto is rhythmically hitting his head against the wall. "She's so stupid," he moans. He doesn't know what Orochimaru-sama is going to make of this at all.

"He's so stupid," Hana corrects, rubbing at her temples like it will make Naruto's actions make any sense.

"Either works, actually," Sakura says.

"This is the dumbest thing Naruto or Natsu has ever done," Kabuto declares, "and that's saying a lot."

No one really has anything to say against that. He's right.

---

They've been traveling for about a week, getting closer and closer to the cities when Naruto decides that they need to try to appear a little less noticeable. "Except you," he says to Zabuza, "you're past hope."

The missing-nin rolls his eyes, "Thanks."

Which leads to Naruto teaching Gaara the Oiroke no Jutsu and dragging both him and Haku shopping while Zabuza goes off hopefully not to kill anyone, and more than likely going to a bar.

"I don't like all the space between my legs," a now female Gaara informs them while twirling around in a bright blue dress, "Can't I wear leggings like you used to?" Female Gaara actually looks a lot like male Gaara, except that his eyes are a much darker shade of green and his proportions are decidedly more feminine.

"Sure," Naruto shrugs. He'd gotten his clothes first since his are the easiest – he's just wearing dark blue and purple pants and black long sleeves. He can hide weapons under it, since they're supposed to be posing as civilians. The colors are close enough to the Konoha under uniform while still being Water Country colors that he doesn't feel like a total traitor. "I think mine might fit you, actually. We just need to get you some tunics. Blue ones."

"Something sleeveless. And light," Gaara tugs at his color, exposing probably too much cleavage to be decent. Even in the relatively ventilated shop he's still sweating.

"You got it," Naruto grins, "Haku, how are you doing?"

"I don't believe this is necessary," he calls from the dressing room. "People mistake me for a woman all the time. They do not need help."

"Haku, get out of here," he says. He can hear the boy sigh from behind the door before he steps out. He's in one of the light traditional kimono's he favors, but this one is cut slightly differently. While the kimonos he normally wears are cut to emphasize his waist and frame so as it make it clear that this is a man's body underneath the kimono, this one is subtly looser to give Haku the illusion of a waist and breasts. "It looks nice," he smiles.

Haku crosses his arms, "Does it need to be blue? I like – pink. Or red. I don't like blue."

"The point is to blend in," Naruto says, and he can tell he's walking on thin ice right now but he can't imagine why. "Two women, a man, and a teenage boy attract a lot less attention that a man and three teenage boys. I'd be walking around as Natsu, except that if anyone recognizes me we're screwed."

"I understand," Haku says, but he won't look at either of them. Gaara raises an eyebrow at Naruto before going back into the changing room.

He goes up to Haku and hesitantly lays a hand on his arm, "Haku, what's wrong? I thought you liked feminine stuff."

"I do," he bites out, eyes to the ground, "but I'm not a girl. I'm a man. I just like – kimonos and pink and all that stuff. But I'm still a man."

"Of course you are," Naruto says, confused, "Gaara currently has breasts and a vagina and he's still a man. He's just pretending to be a woman. It's not like me – when I look like a woman it's because I am one."

Haku looks up at from out of his lashes and says quietly, "Zabuza doesn't like women."

Naruto blinks, because he'd seemed to get along with both Sakura and Tsunami just fine, but then it clicks. "Oh," he says, "and you – like Zabuza?"

"If you tell him," he says quietly, "I will stab a senbon through you're eyeball."

Ew. "I'm not going to tell him!" Naruto swears. The age difference is kind of weird, but he's definitely seen weirder. Haku's like seventeen, and Zabuza is in his early twenties, so in a decade or so it won't even seem weird at all. "How about you wear your normal kimonos, and we'll just get a blue jacket for you to wear on top?" He hesitates, because Haku doesn't need it, but after this conversation he thinks he might want it, "I can do your make up too, if that's okay. I don't wear it much myself, but I know how to put it on."

Haku still looks hesitant, but he nods once and Naruto grins.

That night they're all cramped together in the hotel room they're sharing, Gaara back to male form because he can only keep the Oiroke going about half a day if he still wants enough chakra ready to fight. Gaara is watching, interested in this new thing because his sister has never once worn make up in her life.

Naruto's got a bunch of small pots and brushes lined up beside him, just like when he's going to do complicated sealing. "Stay still," he tells Haku sternly, sitting on his heels in front of him. He's not painting Haku up to be a geisha, so he bypasses the white paint entirely. Actually, the point is to keep Haku looking like Haku, so he ignores the traditional techniques he'd been taught to soften and feminize a face. Instead he applies the blush in even line down his cheekbones to draw the eye to the sharpness of his jaw, and brushes shimmering powder along the crease of his eyes. He forgoes the harsh black for a deep brown, and delicately outlines Haku's eyes. He deliberates a moment picking the lip color, because he always, always chooses plum for himself, but he doesn't think that's what Haku wants. He settles on a pink only a few shades darker than the Kiri shinobi's lips, and swipes it on.

"There!" he says, and holds up a mirror for Haku's inspection. With the light contouring, Haku somehow looks even more masculine even with shaded lips and cheeks. Haku leans closer to the mirror and reaches out as if to touch his reflection. He looks up to Naruto, and the small smile he gets is possibly the sweetest thing he's seen since they began this journey.

Gaara twists to get a closer look at Haku. "I like the eyeliner," he says, "it makes your eyes look really big."

"Do you want me to put some on you?" Naruto offers, and there's a little thrill in his chest. First everyone hated him, and then he was in and out of the Academy in year, and he never really got the chance to have sleepovers. He was taught makeup by masters at their craft, all the gorgeous women in Madame Koi's parlor, but he hasn't played with it just for fun before.

Gaara frowns, but nods, "Kankuro wears paint on his face," he says reasonably, "There's no reason I can't as well." Naruto goes straight for the blackest black for Gaara, and it only takes a couple strokes for him to outline Gaara's mint green eyes in khol. He turns his face from side to side in the mirror. "I like it," he decides, "Thank you, Naruto."

He beams, and he's just about to see if Haku will let him play with his hair when their door bangs open and then Zabuza kicks it shut behind him.

"Hey," he rumbles, making a beeline for his bed. Haku turns his face away in an attempt to keep the older man from seeing, but Zabuza pauses next to them. He's definitely been to the bar, and Naruto's breathe catches in his throat. This absolutely has the potential to end terribly. Zabuza tilts Haku's face up to look at him properly and cocks his head to the side. Haku is already half cringing away, waiting for the reprimand. "Nice," he says, and sweeps his hand up Haku's cheek to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear.

Then he leaves and collapses on top of his covers, snoring before his head even hits the pillow.

Well, it could have gone worse. He turns to Haku, ready to comfort the older boy, but he's beaming. "Can you do my makeup again in the morning?" he whispers, although it seems like nothing short of a full scale attack would wake Zabuza, "And teach me how to do it myself?"

"Sure," he agrees, giving up on understanding their relationship completely. As long as Haku is happy, he guesses when he thinks of it doesn't matter all that much.

Although. He wonders who taught Haku to second guess and be ashamed of himself. In spite of appearances, it doesn't seem like it was Zabuza. They all quietly get ready for bed after that. Naruto shifts to Natsu, because if he can't walk around as woman he's going to sleep as one, and as she's drifting off Natsu touches her lips and wonders what Sasuke is doing right now.

---

"Please stop hitting me," Kiba says plaintively, "it's not my fault that your girlfriend went off on an insane suicide mission."

"She's not my girlfriend," Sasuke grunts, "and I wouldn't be hitting you if you were better at dodging."

"Boyfriend, whatever," he scoffs, "and the Sharingan is an unfair advantage!"

"Because your opponents will play fair?" he mocks.

Kiba sighs, "Well, they probably won't have the Sharingan."

"Unless you face Sasuke's brother," Sakura points out, nose buried in an anatomy book.

He stares, "If I face Itachi Uchiha I'm dead no matter what."

Sakura props her chin on her hand, "If Kakashi-sensei and Itachi fought, who do you think would win?"

All three of them look over to their sensei, who's either snoozing against the tree or at the very least giving the appearance of doing so.

"I want to say Itachi," Kiba says, "for obvious reasons, but you never know with Kakashi. They do call him a genius for a reason."

"He's next in line for the hokage position," Sasuke says, and understands completely when his teammates throw him twin looks of horror. "Yeah."

"How do you know that?" Kiba asks. "That can't be accurate."

"Shikamaru told me," which means it's probably true. "If it happens, we can probably defect to Kiri."

"Except that if he's made hokage, Kakashi-sensei will probably defect too," Sakura says.

Sasuke sighs and glances at Kakashi. Clearly the man doesn't want to do any real training either. "How are the new puppies?" he asks Kiba.

Sakura lights up, "We haven't seen them in so long! Paru was so little last time I visited, can we go play with them?"

"Please stop referring to him as Paru. That means pearl, you know." He says, pained, because the puppy has grown from fitting in the palm of his hand to nearly his waist, and he's the most spirit-touched dog his family has seen in generations. They're not going to call him Pearl.

"Well, he responds do it," Sakura says, "If he didn't like the name he wouldn't answer to it. Can we go visit? Please Kiba?"

Kiba can either bring his teammates to play in the kennels, or continue to let Sasuke throw sharp objects at him as stress relief. "Absolutely," he says.

---

Sai has heard the rumors, but the thing about the seal connecting him to Natsu is that it works both ways. He'd nearly has a heart attack during those few minutes when he couldn't sense her chakra through the seal, but it's thrumming strong right now. So he knows for a fact that Natsu is alive.

Danzo doesn't though, and Sai is disturbed by how irritated the elder is at the girl's supposed death.

"He's looking into the last Uchiha's remaining companions," Tera tells him when he asks about it, giving the young operative a strange look.

So he's after Sasuke somehow? Or a way to manipulate him.

The Uchiha Clan, as one of the founding clans of Konoha, still holds a seat at the Council regardless of it only officially containing one member. If Sasuke were to take that seat for some reason –

He needs to get a look at the political makeup of the current Council. He has a feeling, somehow, that it's about split right down the middle in terms of those Danzo controls and those he doesn't.

---

Ren's father had been a merchant, and she'd grown up with the idea that running your own business meant long hours and a lot of hard work. She'd wanted to be like her father her whole life, managing money and people and sitting on top of it all.

Even after he'd been killed by bandits on a routine caravan inspection and she'd been shuffled from spoiled heiress to a life she hadn't planned on living, she hadn't given up on that dream. It's not quite the same as being a silk trader, but she's proud of what she's accomplished.

Becoming a Madame at the age of twenty one is no joke. She's the youngest in Water Country, and it's because she was good at what she did. That being said, her feet are killing her, so when three men enter her establishment and she only has two girls free right now, she hopes she can do her work on her knees. She deserves a pedicure or something. She could ask Ume to take two of them, but the sweet, flexible girl wasn't the best at multi-tasking and always got confused and distracted when she had to service two clients at once.

Of course, that all flies out of her head when the largest of them shift and she catches sight of a fourth man. The cute blonde holds himself with the same loose, easy grace that she demands of all of her own employees.

He's a trained courtesan, although he doesn't seem to be employed by any of the other men. He meets her eyes and grins, "You catch on quick, huh?"

"I can't know what you mean," she says pleasantly, "How might I accommodate, Sirs?"

The two younger men blanch, as if just realizing what they've stepped into. So innocent. Maybe Ume could handle the two of them. The large man crosses his arms.

The blonde shakes his head and tugs down the band on his pants. Tattooed on his hip is a small white and orange fish.

"You're Koi trained?" she demands, dropping her persona completely. "Do you want a job? I'll pay you double whatever you're making with them." She gestures to his companions. The redhead turns the same color as his hair and the large one laughs out loud.

"My name is Naruto," he grins, "I'm not looking for a job, but thank you. Unfortunately, I never completed my training."

She narrows her eyes. There are roughly a dozen or so Madame Kois spread out across the elemental nations, and those tattoos aren't given out lightly. A Koi trained worker can walk into any brothel and be offered premium pay. The current Daiymo requires his mistresses to be Koi workers. From what she's heard, it's a waste of talent. For being such a violent dick in regards to everything else, his sexual appetite is fairly vanilla. Last she knew, his current girl, Tatsu, had rocked his world by introducing him to blindfolds.

Such a waste.

There is one other way to receive a Koi tattoo. The Koi brothels are old, they've been around for a long, long time. Longer than some countries, in fact.

"You're a shinobi," she says. The original Madame Koi ran one school of training, but at the end there were two different paths her students could choose – that of a courtesan, or that of an assassin.

Naruto grins, "I'm glad the rumors about you weren't exaggerating."

"What do you want?" she juts her chin out, "Where are you from?"

"We're kind of from all over," he leans into her space, grinning, and she's not Koi but she's no slouch either, and if he tries something she can think of four different ways to snap his neck from this position. "What we want is information, information I've been told you have."

"What sort of information?" she asks, and this is a lot trickier than dealing with normal shinobi. With them, it's all the case of giving in to the highest bidder, but she's not about to cross a courtesan with the type of connections a Koi has.

Naruto leans in and delicately sweeps Ren's hair away and over her shoulder so he can whisper in her ear, "We're going to take Kiri. You in?"

She jerks back to look him in the eye, because he can't be serious. He is though, and she feels an answering grin stretching across her own face. If these boys succeed, they'll owe her a big favor.

Growing a business is all about taking calculated risks.

"I'm in," she says.

---

One of the many downsides of being the last of his clan is that when using the Sharingan gives him splitting headaches he has no one to turn to for advice. Kakashi is of no use at all, because he also has no idea to make of the shapes his pupils make in his Sharingan, and the only person who can answer these questions is deep undercover in a terrorist organization.

Sasuke doesn't think he's ever missed his brother more than when he's curled up with a migraine he's sure Itachi would know how to fix. He's supposed to meet his team for dinner, but he can't even make himself move right now.

He wakes up hours later, and he's disoriented enough that it takes him a moment to figure out his head is in Sakura's lap as soothing waves of healing chakra ease the pounding behind his eyes. "This isn't sustainable," his teammate whispers, "We need to figure this out."

Akamaru is curled up around his legs, the dog's head heavy on his hip. It's more comforting than he wants to admit.

"How?" he groans.

Kiba plops down in front of his line of sight, and he hadn't known he was there. Now these headaches were even messing with his chakra sensitivity. "I know you haven't been there since everything happened," Kiba says seriously, "but we need to look through your family's files."

Sasuke closes his eyes, because those types of files will be in his father's office. He hasn't allowed anyone to step inside of it since the massacre.

Kiba reaches out and grips Sasuke's hand like he can siphon out his pain and take it onto himself if he just squeezes hard enough.

"Okay," Sasuke agrees.

He wishes Naruto was here.

---

They're all stay in Madame Ren's home in exchange for Naruto giving her girls lessons in balance and control of one's body. He's reluctantly impressed – for a woman who wasn't born into this industry, she's done an amazing job in training her women and keeping her house in order.

There's something inside Naruto that wants to just run into Kiri blind and get it over with as soon as possible so he can go home. The rest of him that actually wants to live long enough to return to Konoha knows that this is stupid, but he can still dream.

So he splits his mornings between training the four women under Ren's employ and pouring over the files of information the Madame has on Kiri (holy shit is Ren a thorough information gatherer, Jiraiya could take some tips from her). Naruto knows the patrol patterns and guards from his last mission, but he doesn't know the people, doesn't know who will resist them or who will join them, or any of that. At nights when Ren is busy servicing her customers he, Gaara, Haku and Zabuza go out to ocean's edge and train hard because they don't have the luxury of training long, and do so until they're too exhausted to move.

He knows that this information gathering that they're doing is important, that it's necessary, but the longer they stay at Madame Ren's the more he wants to tear his hair out. Of course, he regrets his wish for a little excitement two weeks into their stay when two of the girls, Kokoro and Cho, get bored and kidnap Haku for what they consider to be a little bit of harmless fun.

He stumbles upon them in the upper living room, the one where customers aren't allowed, and he has to stuff his fist in his mouth to keep from laughing. Not because Haku looks ridiculous or anything like that, the girls have actually done a fabulous job, it's just that the older boy looks so blatantly miserable. "Good morning ladies, Haku," he greets, tucking his hands behind his back. "Are you having fun?"

"Tons!" Kokoro says enthusiastically.

"We had to promise to help him bake a cake or something if he let us do this," Cho adds, carefully pinning the last of Haku's hair up. "We definitely weren't spying on you guys while you were training so we definitely didn't see his powers and pick out his outfit accordingly."

"Help me," Haku begs.

Cho smacks him in the shoulder, "This is fun, Haku. Have fun!"

"You do look really pretty," Naruto says earnestly. "Where did you get the clothes?"

Haku's in a pale blue kimono with snowflakes stitched on it, but it only comes down to mid-thigh. It also clearly wasn't made with Haku's shoulders in mind, because the neck is gaped open to his sternum to accommodate them. He's got dark blue pants on under it, and it's all just a touch too flowy to fight it, but Naruto has to admit it does look good, especially with the ornaments in Haku's hair. Cho has piled it all on top of his head in an intricate bun that's being kept together with a handful of jeweled hairpins so it looks like his hair is littered with diamonds.

"The kimono is mine," Kokoro says, "It hasn't fit me in about a decade, but it was so pretty I never wanted to get rid of it. The pants are Taki's. She hates dresses, she doesn't wear them unless she's working."

Haku's been doing his makeup on his own since Naruto showed him how, but his face has been done up in slightly different colors, darker and more dramatic than the more subtle look the older boy prefers.

"All done!" Cho says, jumping back to admire all their hard work.

Kokoro holds up a medium sized mirror in front of Haku, far enough back that he can see himself in his entirely. He raises a hand to his hair, lightly touching the sparkling jewels. His face softens and he looks to Kokoro and Cho, "Thank you."

Cho beams and bumps shoulders with Kokoro, "We should all go out to dinner or something, he's all dressed up with nowhere to go."

"That sounds great!" Naruto says enthusiastically, "There's this really nice ramen place-"

The girls groans and Haku rolls his eyes. "Ramen?" Zabuza says, ducking into the room, "I could go for ramen."

He looks up, right at Haku, and he freezes. Haku locks his hands together behind his back, but smiles hopefully at the older man. Zabuza slowly looks Haku up and down, and swallows. Haku's smile dims. "Master Zabuza?"

That snaps him out of it. He turns on his heel and stalks out, slamming the door shut behind him.

Haku's face crumples. Kokoro and Cho stare after the man who they've known to be nothing but perfectly polite to them. "What was that about?" Kokoro demands.

He swallows, "I don't – I'll just," he yanks out one of the diamond pins he'd been so entranced by moments before.

Before he can do any more damage, Cho's hand snaps out and grabs his wrist. "Don't you dare! You're not ruining my work just because Zabuza is being an asshole!" She tugs the pin out of Haku's hand and stands beside him, carefully putting his hair back in place, "Now stay still."

Haku nods, but the look on his face is pure misery. Naruto finds himself walking out the door after Zabuza, and by the time he's realized he shouldn't get involved he's also realized he doesn't care.

---

Fuck. Shit. He can't bust out his sword while being surrounded by civilians, he can't even go to a bar to start a fight because they're supposed to be keeping a low profile, and he just wants to punch something until he stops hating himself.

"Hey!" Zabuza closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, turning to face the younger shinobi. Naruto glares up at him and demands, "What was that about?"

He shrugs.

The boy growls and jerks him down the street into a narrow ally, and Zabuza lets him because as much as he doesn't want to have this conversation at all, he definitely doesn't want to have it in the middle of a crowded street. "Seriously, why are you being a dick? Was it the jewelry? You don't care about the makeup or the dresses, but jewelry is what you decide to be an asshole about?"

"I like the jewelry," he says.

Naruto throws up his hands, "Then what's wrong? You have to know Haku thinks the world of you, he cares about what you think more than anything else, you can't just brush him off like that and –"

He doesn't realized he's punched through the alley wall until he's got brick up to his wrist and blood running down his arm. He pulls his hand out with a grunt and shakes off the bits of brick stuck into his skin. "I like the jewelry," he repeats mulishly, "Makes it look like he's got snow in his hair, like when the sun's reflecting off it all nice and shit."

Naruto freezes and stares at him for an uncomfortably long moment before bursting out with "You're in love with him too!"

"Too?" he repeats dangerously, and he needs to get over himself, because somehow the red hot flash of jealousy is overriding his need to deny it. "Who else is in love with him?"

"No one!" he shakes his head, "I meant – that he – don't worry about it, forget I said anything." He hesitates, then barrels on, "No wait, never mind, are you an idiot? You'd have to be deaf and blind not to see how he feels about you!"

Zabuza crosses his arms, and now he's got blood all over his shirt, great. This day keeps getting better and better. "He's just a kid."

Naruto punches him in the arm, and fuck, the kid is strong when he wants to be. "When you were his age you defected from Kiri! You TOOK HIM WITH YOU! You knew what you wanted then. Has any of that changed?"

He swallows. "It's pretty messed up," he says finally, "to raise a kid for seven years and then fuck him. I kill the type of people that do that shit. For free. I don't do anything for free."

"Except raise a kid for seven years," the blonde points out wryly.

He snorts, "You think I haven't gotten my money's worth out of Haku? He's the best ninja I've ever seen. He's going to be stronger than me in a few years."

"And you're trying to tell me you knew that when he was ten? A hungry, hurt orphan with no training and no family, who flinched at every shadow? Bullshit. You saw a kid who was hurt and alone and who had been betrayed by the very village you had cast aside, and you took him in. You weren't grooming him. I've seen that shit, all right? Not all of Flower District works above the board. You're saying that you spent seven years having another person depend on you to get someone to fuck?" Naruto slams his hands against Zabuza's chest, but this time he doesn't do it to hurt, "You're not that type of person! You're the type of person who turns a hurt orphan into the best ninja you've ever seen! Even though you were from Kiri and you knew he had a bloodline limit!"

Zabuza stares, because somehow the brat that didn't even cry when he stuck a sword through his gut or when he had to leave his boyfriend and friends behind has tears in his eyes, and he's in no way shape or form prepared to deal with this kid's mental breakdown. He was in the middle of his own, actually.

He hesitantly places a hand on top of Naruto's head, and the boy sniffles. "You were taught to hate him," he whispers, "You were alone and the goddamn Demon of the Mist and if you'd killed him no one would have blamed you, and you saved him instead. You've never asked him to be anything else than what he is, and," he hiccups, "I had to die to get what you give Haku freely, do you get that? I would have done anything for someone to save me, but I had to save myself instead. Its fine, it all worked out fine, I got Itachi-senpai and Kakashi-niichan and Sasuke and everyone else, but don't – don't underestimate – don't lie to yourself. It makes perfect sense to fall in love with the person that saved you, okay?"

Zabuza lets Naruto hide his face in his chest and finally says, "Are you talking about me or Haku?"

"What?" Naruto mumbles, wiping at his eyes.

"He saved me too you know," he shrugs.

Naruto smacks his head against the Kiri ninja. "Please go talk to Haku."

"If I do will you stop crying?" he counters, "You're ruining my shirt."

He looks up, and his eyes are red but dry. "It's already covered in blood," he grins, "It can't get worse, right?"

Zabuza's tempted to tell the kid that it can always get worse, but then he'll start thinking he's superstitious or some shit, but really he's just practical.

They head back, Naruto doing a handstand on his shoulders like they're fucking friends or something. He flips off when they enter the parlor, landing gracefully next to Ren who doesn't bat an eyelash.

When he enters the living room, it's to Kokoro tugging on Haku's hand and begging, "Come on, just a couple drinks, it'll be a lot of fun!"

"People will give you a lot of respect with us on your arms," Cho says confidently, "We don't come cheap, and Ren has a reputation of servicing the best clients."

Haku's got that blank look on his face that makes Zabuza want to go back to what's left of that shitty village he got him from and burn it to the ground.

"Scram," he commands.

Cho and Kokoro turn to face him but don't make a move to leave, glaring at him like he murdered their mothers or something.

Fucking whores. Regular civilians never give him this much shit.

"Please?" he adds, because between what he's about to do and that goddamn brat slobbering all over him in the alley, it's not like he's got any reputation left to lose.

The girls glance at each other, fucking considering, and then look to Haku. His boy won't look at him as he says, "Please excuse us."

They brush past him, and if looks could kill, jeez. He steps over to Haku, hands shoved into his pockets. "I'm sorry, Master Zabuza," Haku says, fiddling with the sleeves of his kimono, "I didn't mean–"

"Don't call me that anymore," he interrupts. Haku's eyes widen, and fuck, that's not what he meant. He sighs and gently cups the side Haku's face, rubbing his thumb against the soft skin of his cheek. His boy's eyes are filled with hurt and confusion, and that more than anything is reason not to do this, he's slaughtered friends and lovers and he's never been anything but a killer. But that damn Konoha shinobi wants him to be a leader, so maybe he can learn to be something more than he's been for Haku's sake too. "If we're going to do this, I don't want you calling me that. Wouldn't be right."

"Doing what?" Haku asks, but he's smart, so he knows. He reaches up and trails his fingers along the bandages covering Zabuza's face, feather light touches that he can't even really feel.

He jerks his bandages down so they're hanging around his neck and tilts Haku's face up. He gives it a second, and his boy is the fasted shinobi he knows, it's more than enough time for him to move if this isn't what he wants. He doesn't, isn't even breathing when Zabuza slots their mouths together.

Zabuza has done his best to teach Haku about violence and fear and power, but if this thing is something he's going to teach the younger man too, then he doesn't want Haku to learn it the same way he did. He moves slowly, cradles Haku's hips in his hands, and let's his boy lean into him and explore, tries to give without taking.

Then something snaps in Haku, and his hands are locked behind Zabuza's neck as he pulls him down and pulls him closer, firming and committing to the gentle touches they'd started with.

"Okay?" he asks roughly, licking the paint from his lips that had transferred from Haku's mouth.

Haku smiles, small and sweet and the only bit of redemption Zabuza has ever had and ever needed. He pulls him closer again, and like in all other things he's a fast learner in this too, so Zabuza opens his mouth under him, lets Haku take what he wants, and prays to every god he's forsaken that he doesn't fuck this up.

---

Naruto, Ume, Kokoro, and Cho lean up against the door, ears pressed to it. "Where's a Hyuuga when you need one?" Naruto moans, "Gaara, please, won't you-"

"Absolutely not," he glares, standing over by Ren for protection. The Madame isn't acknowledging any of them, more concerned with going over her profits for the last quarter. "If I use the Sand Eye then I'm the one that has to see it. No thank you!"

"Spoilsport," Ume mutters, pressing her body up against the door like she can meld through it if she tries hard enough.

Taki walks in, soaked and clothes clinging to her from her swim in the ocean.

Ren points at her without looking up, "Don't drip on the carpet."

"Oh, right," she strips off her shirt and uses it mop up excess water, "Why is everyone creeping at the door?"

Gaara whimpers and smacks his hands over his eyes. Taki is a very beautiful woman who apparently doesn't believe in undergarments. When his siblings sent him on a mission to start and win a war, he's certain that this wasn't what they had in mind.

---

"We have a problem," Hanabi says after shushining into Team Nine's training, dodging Lee's attack that she'd just appeared in front of and subduing him with a half-Lion's Leap.

Neji almost puffs up with pride. She didn't have the upper body strength to pull off that move a few months ago, and now she does it without breaking a sweat. He taught her how to do that. It's oddly satisfying. "What do you need, Hanabi-hime?"

She frowns, eyes flickering across his teammates but settling on his sensei. "You know it's five at night right? And since you start at dawn that's almost thirteen hours of training. And you know they've been training with us at night. When exactly are they sleeping?"

Gai grins and strikes his Good Guy pose, "Your concern for your comrades is most touching, my sweet Konoha blossom!"

"We've been taking five hour breaks to go home and nap," Tenten explains. "So we train from four to ten, break from ten to three, and then train again until seven. Then we catch dinner, meet you guys for another three hours at eight, and we're in bed at eleven."

Hanabi stares, "Have you considered just starting training later and getting a full night's rest?"

"Rising with the sun is a sign of our youthful fire!" Lee says, rubbing at his shoulder. "Your grasp on chakra system disruption is much improved. Your progress speaks well of the will of fire inside of you!"

"You don't go back to the Compound do you?" Hanabi asks Neji, "That would look suspicious."

"Of course not," he says, affronted, "I've been going to Lee and Tenten's place and sleeping on their couch."

For some reason that makes Hanabi glare at his teammate, "You two live together?"

"Yes," Tenten says, and as soon as his cousin leaves he's going to make his Tenten explain what she finds so funny about this, because right this second he's just confused. "We split a two bedroom, since we're both clanless orphans and all. It's cheaper than if we paid for two studios."

That's mollifies his cousin somewhat, and he still doesn't even know what she was pissed about in the first place. Then again, sometimes Hanabi is just in a bad mood because of the weather or what she ate for breakfast. "What's the problem?" he asks.

She looks to Gai, "Are you still pretending you don't know what's going on?"

"THIS SEEMS LIKE A MOST APPROPRIATE TIME TO TEST THE STRENGTH OF MY YOUTH BY RUNNING A LAP AROUND KONOHA!" He sprints off, soon nothing more than a green dot in the distance.

"The thing that keeps me up at night," Hanabi says, pained, "is that he's actually one of our top jounin, he truly is a genius."

"Messed up, right?" Tenten grins.

"Something like that," she sighs, "Since Nami isn't going to be back in the village for who knows how long, we need to figure out what to do with the Branch members who can't have their seal removed. Hinata is improving in leaps and bounds, but having the base matrix still attached to chakra coils is still taking it's toll."

"I could try to burn it off," Tenten sighs, "It's a lot less of a strain on their systems than unraveling and tugging it out, but I don't have large chakra reserves. It'll take me over a month per seal to burn it out. At best."

Lee frowns, "That would be quite a strain of your formidable strength, my most youthful teammate."

Hanabi shakes her head, "It would take too long, and leave you severely compromised in the meanwhile. That's not an option. However, those seals weren't even originally held by Hinata, but by our father. Can you transfer them again?"

Tenten blinks, and her eyes glaze over while she tries to work out. "Maybe? I've done seal transfers before. Who are you going to get it transferred to? It'll have to be another Hyuuga. The main seal has a blood sealing aspect to it, and kids that haven't started the Academy yet are your best bet. You only have two in Main House right now, right?"

"That's correct," Hanabi nods, "but I'm not going to move the core of the Curse Marks to another member of the Main House. I'm going to give it back to the Branch house." She looks to Neji, "I'm going to need you to speak with Isamu's parents again. If he and they are willing, I want him to take on the core."

"Isamu?" Neji repeats numbly.

"Yes," she frowns, "Do you have someone else in mind? He's a little old, but his chakra coils are basically untouched. And when the strain starts warping them, he won't ever be really effected since he's not going to be a ninja. Not like Hinata is. If he changes his mind about his profession then we'll just move the core again, although to be honest at that point I'm hoping we won't have Curse Marks at all."

Neji shakes his head. She keeps on surprising him. "Hiashi will be upset if he realizes you've taken the power of the Curse Mark away from the Main House and given it the Branch House. It was his grandfather that made the decision to use Curse Marks in the first place."

She rolls her eyes, "If I get caught at this point I've already done so much damage to the Hyuuga system and laws that he'll have me beheaded. It's not like I can make it any worse."

---

"This is bad."

Kiba smacks his head down on the desk, sending up a cloud of dust. Sasuke sneezes. "Don't say that," he moans.

Sakura rolls her eyes and nudges Kiba out of the way so she can lay the scroll out, "Look, I think Sasuke activated his Mangekyo Sharingan."

"My what?" he squishes in on Kiba's other side to get a closer look.

"It's the next stage," she explains, "but only eight Uchiha have ever unlocked it." There's a list of names with sketches of different Sharingan eyes next them, and Sasuke trails his fingers over them. "It says that it's unlocked by the guilt of killing the person closest to you."

Sasuke flushes bright red. Kiba elbows him, "Natsu dying wasn't your fault, you know. She made the choice to save you."

"Just like Itachi made the choice that killing our whole family with his own hands was preferable to watching me die," he snaps, "I'm getting sick of the people I care about deciding my life is more valuable than theirs."

Kiba grins, "Well I'm not about to jump off any cliffs for you. I've seen you in battle, you're on your own."

"What he said," Sakura adds.

Sasuke rolls his eyes, and pretends that that's not actually comforting.

"How often have you been using the Sharingan?" she asks.

"Not often," he rubs at his forehead, "The headaches get worse when I do."

"The increased strain is probably because you skipped straight to Mangekyo. The others had all mastered the Sharingan by the time they got their Mangekyo. Your eyes are deteriorating," she says seriously, "It's not fast, according to this it takes about a decade of use for the effects to really start. But eventually you'll go blind from it."

"And there's no way to stop it?" he demands.

"No," she admits, "but these are private files, and it's not like Uchiha are known for their healing. Organ deterioration is a common ailment, and there are a handful of medic-nin who can regenerate them. One of them should know."

Kiba sighs, "I'll talk to Hana and Kabuto."

"Can they do it?" Sasuke blinks. "I didn't think they were that skilled. No offence."

"Hana isn't," Kiba allows, "at least not yet. Kabuto likes to play dumb. He's been at Tsunade's level for years now."

"And he's not running that hospital why?" Sakura scowls.

He shrugs, "A chronic fear of responsibility? The Hospital Head and the freaking hokage forced the promotion of chunin on him when he was sixteen."

"Yikes," Sakura says, frowning as she taps the scroll. "Hey Sasuke?" He raises an eyebrow. "The Mangekyo is supposedly caused by the guilt of killing your best friend, or at least feeling responsible for it, right? So don't you think the guilt of killing your whole family with your own hands would do the trick too?"

"You think Itachi has the Mangekyo?" Sasuke blinks.

She nods, "And if he got it that night, that means he's had it for six years. That's a lot of damage."

Kiba rubs the back of his neck as Sasuke's face goes horribly blank. "One crisis at a time, okay? We need to figure out a way to stop your super cool new bloodline limit from hurting you. Then we'll find a way to help your brother." He squeezes Sasuke's shoulder, "I promise."

He forces himself to smile back and lets Sakura and Kiba pull him along behind them.

---

Baki knows that Gaara can take care of himself, knows that there are very few people on earth who can harm the boy. That doesn't mean he's not furious when he finds out where his siblings have sent him.

"Natsu Nami is dead," he hisses, "and at this rate Gaara is sure to follow."

"Don't be naïve, Sensei," Temari says patronizingly as she elegantly dodges his attacks in a way that reminds him very much of the Leaf brat. "Natsu is as dead as I'm sure Gaara has been captured by the Akatsuki."

He pauses, and the brilliant insanity of his kids' plan unfolds before him. Maybe she does deserve to be Kazekage. However that moment of thought costs him when Temari roundhouse kicks him in the face.

"Get up!" She glares down at him, "I need to train more! I have to be better!"

"We've already been at it for twelve hours," he groans, rubbing at his jaw. "More than enough time training by anyone's standards." Besides, now he has a headache.

"No!" She slides kunai from her sleeves, "Gaara is out there, risking his life and starting a war to help me get this position. I need to be better! I won't risk my little brother's life in vain."

Well, when she puts it like that. He hauls himself to his feet and tosses a barrage of shuriken at her, stepping in to put her in a chokehold.

She counteracts him and tosses him over her shoulder like a bag of flour, then spins on her heel to catch Kankuro mid leap and knee him in the groin.

He's sure once he stop seeing double he'll find it in himself to be proud of her.

---

It's barely dawn, so most of the girls' last clients are just leaving. He's pouring over Ren's files again, but he's still surprised when she walks into her office, knotting a silk robe around her. "I thought you'd go right to bed," he says, kicking out a chair beside him. She curls up in it, resting her chin on her knees with her dark hair making mess around her.

"My last client was easy," she yawns, "He's into somnophilia. I got to spend half the session pretending to be asleep."

"That doesn't make up for actually sleeping you know," he scolds. He puts the file on her desk and uses a quick jutsu that he may or may not have learned from Sasuke to boil the water for tea.

She groans and shuffles the chair closer to her desk, reaching for her accounting book and placing it on her knees. "I still haven't finished balancing the financials. Taki's helping put her brother through med school, and her parents came up short, so she asked for a substantial advance. I want to give it to her, she brings in a lot of business from repressed nobles, but the spring festival is coming up so the girls are going to need new kimonos too. Plus contraceptives are going up, or maybe the herb trader just hates me specifically, he gets pissy when I quote the actual cost of procuring and transporting materials back at him."

"Repressed nobles?" he asks, holding out the tea to her.

She takes it gratefully, and he tries not wince when she knocks it back like she's doing a shot. "She's strong, and tough, and they can rough her up a little. She doesn't mind it and she's good at giving them just enough of a fight that when they get down to business they feel like they've actually won or accomplished something. What she costs in bruise salve she absolutely makes up for in incredibly rich clients that like to extend their power kick even further by tipping double the session costs."

"You know," Naruto murmurs, digging his thumbs into her shoulder blades, "there's a reason most Madames don't offer full services on top of their regular duties."

"Most Madames aren't twenty one and doing their best to hold on to four of the best prostitutes in Water Country," she groans, dipping her head forward.

"You could expand," he says, "You have an excellent reputation. It wouldn't be hard to find girls to come to you."

"I have an excellent reputation because I earn it. Quality, not quantity. I don't have the time to train more girls, and I'm not sending a girl I didn't train myself into a room with a man who could request anything. If she's not trained to fulfill his request, she could get hurt and I could lose a customer. No one wins." She sighs as he loosens another knot in her back, "How are my files treating you? Are you finding what you're looking for?"

"Mostly," he says, "your records are incredibly thorough. Do all your girls have psychological backgrounds?"

"Part of their training is trading blowjobs for lessons from this university professor I know." Naruto tries to turn his laugh into a cough, and fails completely. Ren grins and looks up at him. "He's a nice guy actually, his wife died eight years ago. He considers it a dishonor on her memory to get married or pursue serious relationships."

"But not to get his dick sucked by baby whores?" he snorts.

"No one enters my service under the age of sixteen," she says primly, "and besides, from what I've heard he didn't consider it a dishonor when she was alive either."

Naruto and Ren's eyes meet, and they both burst out laughing. "I've got to tell you about some of Konoha's Koi regulars," he says.

She opens up her book to start finishing the accounts, but says, "I'm listening."

Naruto regales her with his favorite stories from the women he grew up with until the milky grey of dawn shifts to cheerful morning.

---

Hana and Kabuto look at each other, the scroll, and then to Team Seven.

"If you're too busy to help it's okay," Sasuke says patiently. "It's not urgent."

Sakura elbows him and Kiba rolls his eyes.

"As if Natsu would ever forgive us if we didn't help you," Kabuto scoffs, unrolling the scroll. "But damn, between you and the Hyuugas I need to find some way to actually start getting paid. Rent costs money, you know."

"Do you want to move into the Uchiha District?" Sasuke asks. "You're Natsu's teammate, and if you take the time to work on this it would be a huge favor. I'm happy to pay you as well."

Kabuto has to force his mouth shut. "Uh, Sasuke, only Uchiha are allowed –"

"The Uchiha are dead," he says calmly, "There's me, my brother, and Sai. I have plenty of houses. You're more than welcome to any of them."

Kabuto turns to Hana. She shrugs, "I think it's a good idea. Besides, creating a jutsu that's able to repair a bloodline limit containing organ with no negative repercussions? Talk about jackpot as far as the medical community is concerned."

"You know I don't like attention," he grumbles.

She pushes his glasses up his nose, "If you succeed, you'll be able to improve the lives of so many people. I'll help in any way I can."

Natsu had saved him in ways she's never realized. Doing his part to save her boyfriend from going blind was probably the least he could do. "Fine," he sighs. "I accept. Thank you, Sasuke."

The smile he gets in response is the first he's ever received from the kid. It's kinda nice.

---

"Tsunade-sama," Shizune says, looking past her shoulder in the marketplace with a peculiar expression on her face, "Could you describe the Yondaime for me please?"

Tsunade hasn't been back to Konoha in years, and renewed her vow never to return when she heard of Kushina's son's death. People were rotten, the people of Konoha were rotten, and she wouldn't risk her life for them anymore. On paper she may still be a Konoha-nin, but she's put that part of her life behind her.

Which is what makes her assistant's question so startling.

The sannin looks up from the earrings she'd been considering. "What?"

"Please, Tsunade-sama. Humor me."

Shizune does everything for her and asks for basically nothing, so she thinks back to her teammate's student. "Blonde, bright blonde. Like sunshine. The bluest eyes you'd ever seen. He wasn't all that tall, which made lots of opponents underestimate him in battle. He was a solemn child, although he loosened up a little after he and Kushina got together. Strong, obviously. Book smart. A little slow on people." She shakes herself into the present. "Why?"

Shizune takes her by the shoulders and spins her around, "By the flowers."

It only takes a second for Tsunade to see what her assistant had seen. A boy, about fifteen years old, talking and laughing with two gorgeous women by the flower stall. A not unusual occurrence, except maybe the ease between them all. The boy wears dark purple pants and a dark long sleeve. He's got bright blond hair, like sunshine, that goes to just below his shoulders and is kept in a neat ponytail at the back of his neck. One of the woman says something, and he laughs, shifting just enough into her line of sight for her to catch a glimpse of the bluest eyes she's seen in over a decade. Then she sees the delicate slashes across his cheeks, and she can't breathe.

"He's haunting me," she says, and her voice cracks in the middle, "I didn't think it'd be him that haunts me."

"Tsunade-sama, what are you talking about?" Shizune hisses, "Is that him?"

"No," she chokes out, "it's his son."

---

When Orochimaru gets Kabuto's report, it's all normal until he gets to the end. He looks down at his hands, and they're shaking. They've been shaking for days, and soon he's going to have to either return to his original body or find another substitute, before what little physical and mental relief the substitute body grants him dissolves completely.

His original body is a prison. The second he's in it again the pain rips away at him, and whatever sanity he's managed to scramble together is thrust aside. Being back in his original body denotes him to the status of a mad dog, but one that no one has the goddamn sanity to put down. "Is everything all right, Orochimaru-sama?" Karin asks, head tilted in concern.

He could take her body. She'd give it to him willingly, be glad to hand it over, and why wouldn't she be? She's nothing to him, a worthless, pathetic worm, and easing his pain would at least give her minuscule life some purpose -

He picks up the nearest object - a vase of wildflowers said girl had picked and placed in his office - and throws it at the wall. It smashes next to Karin's head, and she doesn't flinch. "LEAVE!" he roars, chest heaving.

She slips out without a word.

He grabs one of the glass shards and slashes it down his arm. The bright red hot of pain and blood allows him to focus just enough so he can force himself down to his laboratory where his body is kept.

As the container of the nine tailed fox, Natsu Nami's body will last longer than most. The demon chakra might even be the solution to his problem, and it's not like he wants to kill Minato's kid, but given the choice between the Uzumaki he's never met and the one that's sworn her life to his service - it's no contest at all.

---

The Konoha genin meet once again at Sasuke's house, all of them spread out across his living room in the middle of the night.

"Chunin exams," Shikamaru says.

Tenten groans, "We can't." Neji raises an eyebrow, "The last thing we need is someone figuring out that you're twice as strong as you used to be. Do you know how many Main House family members are going to be there? I'm not willing to risk one of them figuring you out."

"But that's not fair to you two," he protests, pained.

Lee shakes his head, "I stand with Tenten. I would rather remain a genin for another year than risk you."

Neji softens. When he was put on a team with two clanless orphans, he never thought they'd end up being his best friends.

"I believe if it is best if we abstain as well," Shino says, "Hinata is steadily improving since she's no longer the core of the curse mark, but there are still moves she executes clumsily, either with too much chakra or not enough. It's smart for us to not give all of Konoha the opportunity to observe this difference."

"He's right," Hanabi nods, "We won't participate either." She look to her teammate, "Will your family be upset?"

He almost smiles, "My father cares little for my rank, only my skills. I've been learning my family's jutsu at an acceptable rate. He is satisfied."

"I'll get better," Hinata swears, "We'll compete in the fall chunin exams. I promise."

"Of course you will," Hanabi says, "I expect no less." Hinata smiles at her, pleased.

Kiba looks to his teammates. Sakura shrugs, "I'm willing if you are."

Sasuke nods, "If we're chunin, we can take missions outside the village. We might be able to meet up with Naruto."

Kiba rolls his eyes, "Your boyfriend aside, you're still learning how to use your Sharingan."

"Kakashi-sensei has been training me in it for weeks," he points out, "Also, I can still kick your ass blindfolded, so."

Ino snorts. Kiba crosses his arms, "Okay, well we're in, I guess. Team Ten?"

"In," Ino says decisively. Chouji shrugs and nods.

"Do I have to?" Shikamaru asks. Ino glares. "Troublesome."

"Now that that's taken care of," Sakura claps her hands, "Who wants to break into the Uchiha wine cellar?"

"I'm pretty sure I didn't agree to that," Sasuke says, but he's smiling.

Ino jumps to her feet, "There's more alcohol in that cellar than you could drink over your next three lifetimes. As your friends, it's our duty to help you out."

"Well, if it's your duty," Sasuke mocks, but getting drunk on his parents' overly expensive wine with them actually sounds like a great idea.

---

"Problem?" Haku asks cheerfully, approaching Gaara on the shoreline.

He doesn't look at him. "No." Haku pauses beside him and crosses his arms. "A little. I'm not as good as moving wet sand as I am dry sand. Which doesn't make sense, it's sand, I should be able to control it just fine."

"It took me a long time to get comfortable using both mist jutsus and ice ones," he confides, "They're both water, so you'd think it'd be the same, but it isn't. Zabuza made me run those drills for hours."

"Where is he?" Gaara asks, "I haven't seen you apart since," he coughs and turns bright red.

A pleased flush rises in Haku's cheeks. "He's in Ren's office with Cho going through the records of nobles."

"Oh," he says, "that doesn't, uh, worry you?"

Haku flashes him a flat look, "Zabuza values loyalty. He would never betray someone in such a way. Besides, he doesn't like women anyway."

Gaara blinks, because how could someone look at the gorgeous women they've been surrounded by and feel nothing. It's petty, but he can't wait to tell Kankuro about this. "Do you?"

Haku frowns, "I … don't think so?"

"So you're only attracted to men?" Gaara continues.

The older boy shakes his head, "No. I mean, I am, I guess. I'm really just attracted to Zabuza."

"No one else?"

"No one else," Haku repeats, "There are lots of people I find beautiful. But Zabuza is the only one I've ever wanted to," he touches his lips, and something deep in the gentle boy softens even more. "He's the only one I've ever wanted."

"Oh," Gaara squeaks, and clears his throat when his voice cracks. "How's that going?"

Haku smiles and shakes his head, "Do you want help training or do you want to talk about my sex life? If you're truly curious, I'm happy to do both –"

"Training!" he yelps, "Please!"

Haku is laughing at him, but he honestly doesn't care as long as he's never again forced to picture Zabuza having sex. Uhg.

---

Sai has been digging, which for the record is incredibly difficult when everyone around him is a hyper-aware, paranoid assassin.

Good thing he's better than them, then.

However, that research is driving him up the wall. He was right, of course he was right. The council is almost perfectly balanced between those who are loyal to the hokage, and those who are loyal to Danzo. He wants to gain control of Sasuke, and was planning to use Natsu to do it. Of course, now that's Natsu's not available, the question is what is he going to do instead?

Sai bounces off of a firm chest, and blinks as hands steady him. "Be careful," Daijimu scolds.

"Sorry," he rubs the back of his neck, looking between him and his partner, Tera. They're both all dressed up for a mission, and last he'd checked there hadn't been anything on the roster. "Where are guys going?"

"It's classified," Tera snaps, cutting off Daijimu who'd been about to answer.

Missions are never classified. They might be full of utter lies, but Danzo likes to keep up the façade of transparency so his people will trust him more.

"The Uchiha?" he says sympathetically, "That sucks."

Tera raises an eyebrow, "You know?"

"Of course," he lies, "Danzo approached me first, but then decided I wasn't a right fit."

"No one's a right fit for this one," Daijimu grumbles, "killing one of our genin just doesn't seem right."

Sai's stomach turns to ice even as Tera slaps him upside the head, "Stop that! Those are our orders and we'll do it!"

"Or course we will," he agrees, "That doesn't mean I've got to think it's right. Poor girl isn't even from a ninja family, and we have to make it messy."

Not from a ninja family. There's only one active Konoha genin that isn't from a ninja family. He's running even before he's completed the thought, because it's going to take him a lot longer to sneak out a message than it'll take those two to walk out, and all he's capable of is sending a message because he's not strong enough to fight his way out.

"Sai!" Daijimu calls out, startled, "Everything okay?"

"Fine!" he calls back over his shoulder, "Don't worry about it!"

He has to hurry. Daijimu and Tera are some of the most skilled in Root, and the fact that the two of them are being sent to kill one girl – he doesn't know how Danzo is planning to spin this, but it's not good for any of them.

---

"He's dead," Tsunade repeats, bottle of sake held loosely in her hand.

Shizune scowls at her from the other side of the room, "He's clearly not, Tsunade-sama. I would greatly appreciate if you would tell me what's going on."

Tsunade chugs the last of the sake and lets the bottle drop from her hands and roll away when she's done. "Ge'me a hawk," she slurs.

"What?" her assistant says, exasperated.

"A hawk," she repeats, curling up in the chair as the alcohol lulls her to sleep. "Go'n ge'me a h'wk."

For the first time in almost fifteen years, she's going to contact Jiraiya.

---

Sakura breathes slowly as she moves herself into a handstand. She tilts her weight so she's balanced on a single hand, and she can't do this next part without chakra, not yet. She lifts herself up on her fingertips, and even with chakra she still needs to use two fingers to keep herself upright.

Both Sasuke and Kiba are better at this than she is, but there's nothing for her to do but practice at this point. Sasuke is with Kiba down by the river, attempting to help the other boy extend control of his chakra to encompass Akamau as well. She's better at that than both of them, but she needs to stop shirking the exercises Natsu had given her. Now that they're back in Konoha there's really no excuse.

Every muscle in her body tightens suddenly, and her breath quickens. She flips back onto her feet and pulls out two kunai, swinging her head around wildly. She can't see anyone but that doesn't matter. Kakashi had drilled it into her to her to trust her instincts, and she knows that there's someone watching her. She can feel it. "Come out!" she shouts, "Show yourself!"

She still doesn't see anyone, but she senses the flash of chakra just in time to duck out of the way, twisting her body in way that Ino taught her to do around a pole but is just as useful here. "I'm sorry, girl," a dark voice says from all around her, and the rolling killing intent makes her swallow.

"About what?" she says, voice shaking.

A strong man grabs from behind and stabs a kunai into her thigh, "This."

She screams, high in the back of her throat and loud enough that the birds fly from the trees.

---

Tsume is going over the clan's active duty roster when she hears a piercing howl from the kennels, and two of her clansmen shouting. She and everyone else in the house run outside, and it's to see her clansmen on the ground and bleeding. "What happened?"

"It was the spirit touched dog," Nina coughs. Hana gets on her knees beside them, her hands lighting green. "He went nuts and ran. We tried to stop him, I'm so sorry Tsume."

That dog is looking less than like a dog and more like wolf every day. He's more than four feet tall on all fours, and she can't blame any of her clan for failing to subdue him. "It's all right," she smacks her daughter on the back, "Come with me, we're going to go get him."

She and Hana whistle, and their ninken come loping over. They run as one, going faster than most people with their ninken besides them in a precise formation. No one can keep up with Tsume when she runs, but Hana doesn't falter or strain to stay at her side.

Tsume has to hide a smile because this isn't the time. Still, it's a comfort to know that when she steps down and Hana takes her place, no one will be able to doubt her.

---

Sakura doesn't know why they haven't killed her yet. They've gagged her and are cutting her, deep, painful wounds that well all over her skin. She wants to fight back, has managed to land a few powerful kicks and punches, but they're closer to Kakashi's level of skill than hers, and she doesn't understand why these men are attacking her, but she doesn't get the point of the torture at all.

They've broken all of her fingers, taking away her ability to do jutsu. She's never felt more helpless and pathetic than she does right now.

He jams the knife into the meat of her shoulder, and she jerks her head to the side, head butting him with enough force that he staggers back, but he also drags the knife through her along with him. Her knees buckle against the pain, but at least now he's bleeding too.

"Bitch," he spits, tugging the knife out of her, and the gush of blood that follows leaves her light headed. At this rate, she'll die of blood loss before anything else.

His partner shakes his head, "Don't. If you let some little girl get the drop on you, it's your own fault."

She's obviously outclassed, she's a genin and these men are at least jounin, but she's so sick of people underestimating her. She went through the Academy same as everyone else, took the same tests, graduated the Top Kunoichi over two clan heirs, was put on the same team as the Rookie of the Year and the son of the Inuzuka clan head, is the student of Copy-Nin Kakashi, and she is fucking exhausted by people who think she's nothing more than a little girl playing ninja.

She lets her eyes roll into her head and becomes dead weight in her captor's arms. He stumbles, "What the hell? She can't die yet, we're not done!"

"Lay her down," his partner commands, "We'll just have to heal her so we can continue."

Her fingers are beyond help, but as soon as she's on her back and not being restrained anymore she surges forward and elbows the closest one in the face, simultaneously kicking the other one in the chest. They both take a step back, and it gives her just enough room that she's on her feet and running. She's made it maybe twenty feet when she's tackled to the ground again. He sits on her chest and uses his knees to pin her arms to the ground. "Screw this," he growls, unsheathing a kunai, "we can mutilate your body after we kill you." He raises his arm to slit her throat, and she tenses to jump at just the right moment, because if she can disrupt his aim enough she might survive it.

There's bark and growl, and she almost wilts in relief, because Sasuke and Kiba have come looking for her. But instead of her teammates a giant, pure white dog tackles her attacker to the ground.

"Paru!" she gasps, jumping to her feet. She grabs the kunai the man had been planning to kill her with, and she spins on her heel to his partner. It's just like the training game that Natsu and Anko had set up for them, the exact same, she just needs –

The kunai goes flying and embeds itself into his throat. His eyes widen and blood spurts out, and she wants to look away, but she's a professional. People aren't dead until they're dead, so she runs forward, and the pain of doing this with her mangled fingers makes her want to scream. She kicks out his legs so he falls to his knees, yanks out the kunai so his blood gushes all over them both, and snaps his neck. His limp body falls to the side, dark eyes glassy in death, and she doesn't have the time to freak out about this right now.

She looks over and Paru is locked in battle with the other man, and the dog is favoring his left leg. She shouts, "Paru, down!" He's a dog, and she's not an Inuzuka, so he shouldn't be able to understand her. But he does, flattens himself to the ground, and she doesn't hesitate, throws that same kunai with the same force and precision as she'd been taught.

It flies true and buries itself halfway into her last attacker's skull. He's dead before he hits the ground.

Chest heaving, she collapses to her knees, covered in blood that's not all her own and the bodies of men she killed at either side of her. Paru trots over and sits in front of her, head cocked to the side. For a moment there's two of him, but she blinks her dizziness away. "You're hurt," she croaks, reaching out a broken hand to his leg. She knows better than to try to touch an injured animal, but before she can move away Paru limps into her and sets his massive head on her shoulder, giving her the closest thing to a hug that he's capable of.

She's not crying, she won't cry, but she wraps her arms around Paru and buries her face in his fur to hide the fact that she's shaking.

"Sakura!"

Paru starts growling, tense and ready to attack whoever's behind her. She turns, and there's Hana and her mom. She clumsily pats Paru's head. "It's okay," she says, speaking to them and Paru both, "I'm okay."

Hana approaches her slowly and Tsume body flickers away. Paru settles down, but still stands alert, ready to attack if Hana makes a move he doesn't like. "I'm going to heal you now, okay?"

"Okay," Sakura says, annoyed at being treated like glass but without the energy to do anything about it. Hana's hands light green, and for how painful it all is her wounds are mostly superficial. Blood and muscle and skin, all simple things to repair for a trained medic-nin. She heals Paru by trailing an absent hand down his leg. Sakura has to shut her eyes when Hana gets to her fingers, straightening the broken bones so she can heal them correctly.

There's a rush of chakra and Kiba and Sasuke crowd into her. She should be feeling claustrophobic, but seeing her teammates is only a relief. Paru snorts at both the boys, but doesn't make any move to attack them. Kiba doesn't hesitate to curl around her, pulling her body back into his and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Sasuke watches her, dark eyes solemn as he grabs some bandages from his pack and carefully cleans the blood from her face. "Sai sent us a message," Kiba whispers, "we were so scared that we'd come here and find –" He cuts himself off and hugs her just a little bit tighter.

Sasuke tilts her head to delicately clean the blood from around her eyes. "You are a fearsome and competent warrior," he says calmly, "I'm gratified to be protected by your strength and proud to say we share a village."

Somehow that's the thing the pushes her over edge, but Sasuke doesn't react to her tears, only wipes them away as well. Hana backs away once she's fully healed, and not a moment later Kakashi taker her place. Sakura hadn't even noticed he and Tsume arriving. Sasuke leans back as well so Kakashi can cup her face. "Do you want to go home?" She thinks of facing her parents like this, the death of two men on her hands and drenched in blood, and she honestly doesn't have the energy to deal with their screaming. She shakes her head. "Do you want to come home with me?" he offers instead, and the idea of being able to rest in the same home as Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei, two of the best shinobi she knows and who have killed more people than she probably ever will, is more comforting than she wants to admit. He must be able to tell, because even under the mask Kakashi's face softens.

He holds out his arms to carry her. "Sensei, I'm all," she gestures to herself.

"I've seen worse," he says, and that's a comfort too, that a bloody thirteen year old killer is nothing to what he's seen, to what he's done. He picks her up bridal style, and looks down to her two other teammates. "Write up the report and deliver the bodies to the morgue. Use a stasis jutsu."

They both nod. Kakashi starts to walk away, then pauses and looks down. Paru looks up at him, tail wagging. Sakura lowers her hand and Paru give it an affectionate lick. The thought of leaving without Paru makes her chest ache, and she can't think of why.

"He's yours now," Tsume says, and Sakura tilts her head look at her. "He answered your call and spilled his first blood in defense of you. He'll follow no other." The older woman hesitates, but continues, "I won't force your hand, but just so you know – this makes you a part of my clan as much as if you'd been born into it."

"What?" she demands, the adrenaline sparking her awake. "What does that mean?"

"Don't worry about it now," Tsume says gently, "We can discuss the details later. But Paru chose you long before today, and I know better than to go against the wishes of the spirits. He's yours, you're his, and you're both Inuzuka."

It's too much to take in right now, so she lets her head drop back onto Kakashi's shoulder and whispers, "Okay."

Kakashi sighs, but obediently grabs onto Paru's scruff. When he body flickers away he takes both Sakura and her companion with him.

---

They're hiding out behind some extremely large rocks. Shizune glares, "I want you to know that this is called stalking."

"We're not stalking," Tsunade insists, "We're observing."

"Now you sound like Jiraiya," she mutters. The sannin wants to deny it, but her assistant may have a point.

Naruto and the red headed boy are training on the beach's edge, one of the many strange people the boy keeps around him. Jiraiya hasn't responded to her but she knows him, has known him for most of her life, and she trusts that he's coming.

The light of the moon washes out both the boys so they look almost like ghosts practicing taijutsu by the tide. Seeing those two hair colors together reminds her painfully for a moment of Minato and Kushina, and she still doesn't understand how their son who was pronounced dead is standing in front of right now, but maybe after all the shit she's lived through this is finally the miracle she never thought to ask for.

Then a man comes flying in from nowhere, and starts attacking the boys. She rushes to join the battle, because there is one other person she knows as well as she knows Jiraiya, and she'd recognize that fighting style anywhere.

What the hell Orochimaru is doing attacking her godson she has no idea.

---

"Here," Kakashi says, pushing her into the bathroom. He turns the shower on and steam slowly starts to fill the bathroom. "Get cleaned up. I'll find something for you to wear."

He turns to leave, but Sakura grabs his sleeve. "Don't go." It should be enough to have Paru panting at her side, but Kakashi is her sensei, and she'd seen him fall on that bridge in Wave, but she still holds onto her childish belief that as long as he's with her nothing can go wrong. "Just – close your eyes. And stay. Please?"

"Okay." He sits on the closed toilet and makes a show of pulling the mask up to cover his whole face, and then slaps a hand over his eyes for good measure.

Sakura giggles, and some of the tension eases from her body. She strips off her blood soaked clothes, and she doesn't want to stick them in the hamper and get blood on everything else, so she ends up kicking them into the corner for later. Her bun is lopsided and matted, and she tugs her hair out before stepping under the warm spray of water. She tugs the shower curtain shut behind her, "You can look now."

"There's some of Natsu's shampoo in the corner," he says.

The water is still running pink, and she's seized with the need to be clean. "Sensei," she starts, choked, not sure how to articulate how horrible she feels in this moment, how she's willing to peel her skin away just to get the blood off.

He shoves his hand into the shower, offering her a washcloth. "Soap's under the shower head."

"Thank you," she whispers, squeezing his hand as she takes the washcloth from him. She ducks under the scalding water, and thank god he knew she'd need it to be this hot, and starts scrubbing herself down from head to toe. "Kakashi-sensei, can you – talk?"

He doesn't need to be asked twice, immediately jumping into a stream of secondhand stories about the new kids in Iruka's classroom. She washes her hair twice to make sure it's really clean, and wet it's nearly to her hips. She stands under the warm spray for a few more moments, checking under her fingernails and behind her ears to make certain all the blood is really gone. She shuts off the water, and Kakashi falls silent for second, and she can hear him moving. "My eyes are closed," he promises before pulling back the curtain. He's holding a large fluffy towel pulled wide between his hands, and she steps out of the shower into it. He folds it around her, and it's almost more of a blanket than a towel.

Kakashi lifts her into his arms, and she feels like a little kid again. She looks down at Paru staring up at her. A bloody washcloth is discarded into the sink and the blood that had been covering her companion is gone. "Thank you," she says, leaning her head against him.

Kakashi shrugs and walks her into the bedroom. Iruka looks up from where he's tucking in a corner of the sheets he's just changed and smiles, "Hello Sakura. I found a spare pair of Natsu's leggings and one of my shirts. Would that be okay?"

She nods. Kakashi sets her down on the edge of the bed, making sure the towel is still wrapped firmly around her. They both move as if to leave, but once again Sakura snags Kakashi's hand. "Don't go," she repeats, and she's legally an adult, she's a kunoichi of Konoha, and tomorrow she'll find it in herself to move on from this, because these may be the first deaths by her hands but they won't be the last. But that's tomorrow, and for today she just doesn't want to be alone.

Iruka kisses Kakashi on the cheek, "More room on the couch for me," and pats Sakura on the head before leaving.

Kakashi again makes a big show of covering his eyes, and Sakura scrambles into the borrowed clothes as quickly as she can. She's swimming in Iruka's long-sleeve, but it's soft and doesn't smell anything like blood. "Okay."

He uncovers his eyes and sits down beside her, turning until he's to her back. She's confused until his fingers start combing through her hair, "If you sleep in it like this it will get knotted. Do you mind?" She shakes her head. The last of her tension bleeds away as Kakashi untangles her hair, taking excessive care when working through a knot to ensure he doesn't tug on her scalp. Then he starts braiding it together, easy and smooth until he ties it off with her hairband that he must have grabbed from the bathroom floor. "Okay?"

"Perfect," she yawns, twisting so she can throw her arms around Kakashi, "Thank you, Sensei."

"Anytime," he tugs on the end of her braid. "Now go to bed. You've had a long day." She nods and scrambles under covers. Paru hops into bed and snuggles down beside her, a massive, furry protector curled against her side. Kakashi pulls off his shoes, headband, and flak jacket before settling down on top of the covers on his side so he's facing her, so she's got Paru on one side and Kakashi on the other. "You did well today, Sakura. I'm proud of you."

She smiles and curls into Paru. Kakashi-sensei is proud of her. She's made arguably the best ninja in Konoha proud of her.

All the hard work and pain and training that she's undergone since she was five years old has been worth it, just to bring her to this moment right here. It was all worth it.

---

Sasuke feels too big for his skin, irritable and restless in a way he hasn't since he started hanging out with Natsu. He's wandering the streets of Konoha, just to have something to do that isn't training by himself. Sakura, his teammate and his friend, could have died today, and he would have only shown up in time to collect her corpse, just like the Massacre all over again. He can already tell he's going to have nightmares about this, about Sakura having moved a hair slower and he and Kiba showing up to find her dead and mangled body.

Although, according to Sai that's what Danzo wanted. Why the hell the creepy old man thought traumatizing Sasuke more would be in anyone's best interest he has no idea, but this happened to Sakura because of him. Itachi killed their clan because of him, Naruto took a sword to the gut because of him, and now Sakura was nearly killed because of him. He doesn't know how much more of this he can take before he loses his mind.

"Lost, little boy?" a smooth, feminine voice asks.

He jerks his head up, and the first thing he notices is the red lantern in every window. He hadn't meant to wander into the Flower District, but he's not about to panic and run out of their either. "I am not," he says calmly.

"Are you looking for some company then? A little young, boy," the voice continues, and he can just barely see the silhouette of a woman cloaked in the shadows. Something about this woman is familiar to him, but he can't figure out what.

"I am not," he coughs, flushing. "Do I know you? Come out of the shadows."

"Giving me orders?" she snorts, "So like a man."

He blinks, startled. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to order you. Please come out of the shadows."

That causes the woman to pause, and it clearly isn't what she was expecting. She steps from the darkness into the dull glow of the streetlight. She's older than he thought, early sixties, powder white hair piled onto her head. She's wearing a long bright orange kimono with a pure white obi, and everything about it screams expensive. His thought process stutters when he reaches her face, because it's clear that she was once, and still is, a great beauty, but it's more than that. The high arched cheekbones and blue eyes so dark they're nearly black bring him back to a time when he was little more than a toddler, chasing after a woman's skirts and pleading to be picked up. "Grandma?"

The woman quirks an eyebrow, "No, I am not my sister. We were always told the resemblance was startling."

"Sister?" he repeats, heart in his throat as he takes a step closer to the woman, "Grandma didn't have a sister."

Her lips thin, "You're right, my mistake." She turn and walks away, "Are you coming, Sasuke?"

"Where are we going?" he demands, running up to her side. "Who are you? You're definitely Uchiha."

"I haven't been Uchiha for almost fifty years," she dismisses, "You may call me Madame Koi."

He nearly trips, "You're Natsu's Madame Koi?"

"I did train Natsu Nami," she agrees, leading him deeper and deeper into the Flower District.

"So you trained Naruto Uzumaki too then," he presses.

Madame Koi doesn't pause, "Well, they are the same person." She leads him into a large, bright house that's somehow cleaner than all the other buildings surrounding it. There's gorgeous women and a few exceptionally pretty men standing around, all of them holding themselves with the same easy grace as Naruto. She leads him through them all and up the stairs until she reaches the attic. He doesn't know what he expects to be behind the door, but it isn't a perfectly functional dojo. She closes the door behind him, "You're not trained in the art of the sword."

"No," he says, confused, "I never –"

"That wasn't a question," she interrupts, walking over to the wall and taking down two training swords, "I can tell by the way you move. Sloppy. Undisciplined." Sasuke would probably be offended if he could force himself to look away from the other Uchiha who had somehow survived the Massacre. She tosses him a sword. "We're going to change that."

"Why?" he demands, "Why are you teaching me swordplay? Why didn't you tell me you were alive before? Does Naruto know? Why aren't you a recognized Uchiha?"

"Naruto never questioned who I was before I became Madame Koi," she says impatiently. "He, the incredibly stupid boy, found me to be kind and decided he wanted to be just like me. Hence the obsession with orange as a child. Then he became Natsu and," she shrugs, "they say imitation is the highest form of flattery." He hadn't thought of it before, but Natsu's dark eyes are the exact color of Madame Koi's, and Natsu's ash colored hair is only a few shades off from the older woman's pure white. "And I am teaching you the sword," she continues acidly, swinging the training blade up to his throat faster than he can blink, "because you had the look of a man who was going to do something stupid. I am tired of watching Uchiha men make stupid decisions."

"But what about –" Madame Koi sweeps his feet out from under him, and again he finds a sword point at his throat.

"That's twice I could have killed you now. No more questions." She pulls the blade away, "On your feet. We'll work on your stance first."

Well. He has nothing better to do.

---

Naruto would be dead if it weren't for Gaara grabbing the crazy ninja with his sand and slamming him to the ground. He breaks away a moment later, but Naruto's aware enough now to hop onto the man's shoulders, and then flip away.

"Does this crazy belong to you or me?" he asks Gaara.

The other boy sends him a flat look and finally gains enough control over his sand to put up a wall to take the hit of an electricity jutsu. "GIVE ME YOUR BODY!" the man roars.

"Definitely yours," Gaara says.

"Orochimaru!" A woman yells, popping up from behind the rocks and chasing them both, "Don't you dare hurt them!"

"Orochimaru?" Naruto peeks around the wall, "Man, he's not looking so good." It also means that the scary blonde woman is Tsunade. Great. Itachi just needs to pop up and it'll be a party of The Worst People To Track Him Down While He's Planning a War Ever.

He should probably work on a shorter name.

Tsunade punches him hard enough that he goes flying and hits Gaara's sand wall with a painful sounding crack. Naruto crouches down next the unconscious sannin. His hair's oily and too long, his pale skin has splotches of red, and his clothes are dirty and stained. None of that, of course, is nearly as interesting as the roiling mass of dark, complicated chakra he can sense under the man's ribs. It's a seal, old and knotted, and he wants to see. He's already rolled him over and started tugging down his shirt when Tsunade stomps over and roars, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

He pauses, considering that he's straddling an unconscious S class missing-nin while undressing him, and says, "There's an explanation for this."

She crosses her arms and raises an eyebrow.

"He's got a weird seal on his chest. I want to see what it is."

Gaara slaps a hand over his face. Tsunade's mouth drops open. "You can't just go messing with seals! He's been experimenting on himself for years, who knows what that seal is connected to."

"But twenty years though, thirty?" he murmurs, fingers twitching to bring the chakra seal to life. "That's how old it is."

"Only a master can tell the age of seal through it's chakra," Tsunade snaps, "Stop playing around before you hurt yourself."

Naruto's about to snap back at her, because he hasn't spent nearly a decade studying and cultivating the reputation of a master only to talked down to like that, but then he remembers Natsu Nami is the seal master, not him. "I know what I'm doing," he says instead.

"Maybe you should do it somewhere more private?" Gaara suggests, glancing around at the open waves. "If you're going to experiment on him, we should do it back at Ren's."

Naruto frowns, "Do you think she'll be mad if we bring back an S class missing-nin though?"

The boy stares. "Zabuza."

He blinks, "Excellent point." He stands and hauls Orochimaru over his shoulder before turning to Tsunade. "I don't suppose you'll let me walk off with your unconscious teammate so I can keep him in a brothel while I mess around with his seal, will you?" She glares. "Okay, you can come with. But don't cause trouble."

He spins on his heel and walks away. Tsunade sputters after him, "You're telling me not to cause trouble? Me?"

Gaara rubs his forehead. Being friends with Naruto causes him to experience migraines. Of course.

---

Kabuto looks down at the scroll he'd just finished inking. It contains the complicated series of seals that actually form a jutsu to pre-emptively repair the damage done by the Mangekyo, and if this is how Natsu feels every time she casually breaks every known rule of sealing then he understands why she does it so often.

Hana's asleep with her face buried in her arms. He pokes her, and she startles awake with a snort. "Wah?" she blinks at him, and even with her face sleep creased and covered in drool he still thinks she's cute. He's so fucked.

"Finished it!" he brandishes the scroll and her face lights up. "Should we go see if Sasuke's awake?"

"He didn't come home last night, remember?" she yawns, "Again."

Kabuto frowns and taps the scroll against his palm, "You know, if he wasn't so obviously in love with Naruto I would find his constant visits to the Flower District extremely disconcerting."

"He's just training," she reminds him, rolling her neck around to work out the kinks.

"He's learning sword fighting from a prostitute," he counters.

Hana shrugs. "My family was taught combat jutsu by forest spirits. Whatever works."

Kabuto considers that he himself has a stash of ninjutsu and taijutsu that he learned from the snakes, and concedes that she has a point.

---

Sakura isn't rushing into this. It's been weeks of training with the Inuzuka and Paru, and maybe she could continue on like this, being an Inuzuka without the commitment, but Paru has grown even more since they've become linked, and he's not done yet. It's likely that by the time he's done he'll be the size of a horse. Her parents love her, but they don't understand her, and they don't understand Paru.

They try to make him sleep outside, away from her, and they got all upset when they'd found out about the assassins and threatened to complain to the hokage that their little girl had been attacked. It makes her want to scream, because they mean well, but they don't understand that it doesn't matter that she's thirteen. She's a ninja of Konohgakure, and when assassins come she's the one the hokage calls in to take care of them. She doesn't need protection, she is that protection.

Her mother had cried and her father had yelled, but she's an adult now and they can't stop her from moving out. They can't stop her from dropping the Haruno from her name, and they can't stop her from sitting quietly in a chair while Tsume pushes ink into her skin. "We were all born with them," the older woman murmurs as she tattoos the red ink into Sakura's skin, "but these will look the same when I'm done, I promise."

"Okay," she whispers, and she knows it's petty but she can't help but think that the red ink will clash with her hair. She runs her fingers over her braid as Tsume works. She's started styling it like this instead of the bun. On one hand, people can grab on to it. On the other, as she demonstrated on Kiba during training last week, she can also use it to strangle people. She startles when she feels Tsume start to ink another triangle into forehead.

"It's to show you're spirit touched," Tsume explains.

"I'm not though," she frowns, "that's just Paru."

She has her eyes closed, but she can still tell the woman is silently laughing at her, "My dear, Paru is more spirit than he is not. He came to this plane through us for you. He's the spirit that's with you."

Sakura holds out her hand, and Paru bumps his massive head into her hand. "Why?" she asks, "Why me?"

Tsume taps her on the nose, "I have no idea! You're clearly destined for interesting things, Sakura."

"That sounds like a curse," she grumbles.

The older woman hums her agreement and continues inking the Inuzuka clan markings into Sakura's skin.

---

Tsunade would like on record, somewhere, that Naruto definitely inherited his mother's personality, also known as insanity. Tsunade's been keeping Orochimaru in a coma and alive while Naruto's been studying his chakra seal, of which he's been annoyingly tight lipped about. What she should have done is either killed him and collected the bounty, or shipped him off to Sarutobi and been done with it. Since she doesn't actually want to do either of those things, and would actually prefer to heal that gruesomely extensive nerve damage the man is sporting, probably explains why she's been helping a thirteen year old poke around at her teammate instead.

"Will you let me run some tests on you?" she asks suddenly, starring at Naruto who's spending his daily handful of hours trying to pick apart Orochimaru's seal. An entire wall of the room he's being kept in is covered with Naruto's notes.

Gaara had confided in her that this was actually fairly slow progress, as far as Naruto was concerned. He'd taken apart a Curse Mark he'd never encountered before in under a minute on the fly. The fact that it's taking him this long to pick apart the sannin's seal means it's either extremely complicated, extremely deteriorated, or both.

Naruto blinks and looks up, "What?"

"You don't look like a thirteen year old boy," she explains, "The jutsu you use to be a girl has an aging component to it, right?"

"Yes," he frowns, "Three years."

"Well, you look about that much older in your original body too," she says. "Can I run some diagnostic jutsu? I just want to see if it carries all the way through."

He shrugs, "Knock yourself out."

She runs a scanning jutsu she developed herself, and isn't that surprised at the reading. "It carries all the way through."

"Cool," he says, pulling apart another intricate section of the chakra matrix in front of him, "What does that mean?"

"Your brain is, development wise, about the same as a sixteen year old. Your body also roughly matches a sixteen year old hormonally." She sighs, "I would have loved to track your aging speed over the last several years. The data must be fascinating."

He nods, "Hey, Tsunade? You're kind of a nerd, you know that?" She crumples one his discarded notes and throws at his head, but doesn't attempt to deny it. "Tell me about Orochimaru."

She stares, "What?"

"Tell me everything, from when you first met in the Academy to now," he says, "You never know what ends up being useful when it comes to sealing. Start talking."

She has the feeling like he's trying to humor her or distract her, but she does it anyway, casting her mind back to a time she hasn't thought about in decades.

---

When Sasuke shows up for his daily sword lesson, there's something sadder and more open on Madame Koi's face today than any of the other days before. "Come with me," she says, once again in another slightly different, but equally elaborate, orange and white kimono. She doesn't take him to the dojo, but instead to a room in the corner of the house. It takes him a moment to realize he's in her room, and he looks around with renewed interest. It's got large windows on both exterior walls, and the color scheme unlike her clothes seems to be gold and dark blue. "You've been progressing more quickly than I ever thought possible over these past weeks."

"Thank you Madame Koi," he answers, pleased. The older woman is a strict taskmaster, and extremely skilled at the sword. She easily could have been a great shinobi.

Mounted behind her desk is a short chokuto blade. She lifts it down and then turns to Sasuke, holding it out to him flat on both hands. He looks to her, then back down. "Take it," she says.

He folds his hands around the leather of the sheath, and it's worn and butter smooth. "This is old."

"Very old," she agrees, "It's the sword of Kusanagi." She visibly hesitates, but continues, "When I was disowned by your great-grandfather, he gave it to me as a form of insult. I want you to understand that I'm giving it to you for a different reason entirely." Sasuke's head snaps up, because he's asked and asked, and still she's refused to speak of her past. "I was set to graduate the Academy as Rookie of the Year. My jutsus were shit, but no one could beat me with a blade in my hand. I was twelve," she lifts Sasuke's chin to look him in the eye, "There are many adults who will tell you that twelve is far too young an age to fall in love. Those people are wrong. I was in love with a boy, Hikaru Hyuuga." Sasuke winces, because he can already tell where this story is going. The Hyuuga and Uchiha have been rivals as long as both clans have existed. "He was kidnapped by Kumo diplomats."

Sasuke blinks, "Wasn't Kumo also the ones that tried to kidnap Hinata?"

She smirks, "Kumo clan families now have something of deadly rivalry between them and Hyuuga. I'm afraid that's my fault. This first time, it was only as a way to get a closer look at the Hyuuga eyes. However, Hikaru was only a branch member, so his clan head refused to pay his ransom."

"Of course," Sasuke scoffs.

"I wasn't about to let the boy I loved die in Kumo," she says calmly, "so I missed the graduation exam to march to him by myself and took him back."

"By yourself?" Sasuke repeats, laughing.

She shrugs, "No one could stop me with a sword in my hand. I went to Kumo, snuck my way in, and then fought my way out with Hikaru slung across my back." His grin melts across his face, because if this story had a happy ending they wouldn't be standing there now. "The Hyuuga clan head considered it a dishonor that an Uchiha had reclaimed their kin. To cleanse themselves of the dishonor, the clan head activated his Curse Mark. He died of a chakra triggered brain aneurysm right in front of me."

"You were twelve," Sasuke whispers, pale and horrified.

"My father considered my actions foolish and considered me a useless failure for putting my personal wants before the needs of my village," she continues. "He disowned me, stripped me of the name Uchiha, and left me with nothing but the clothes on my back and," she briefly touches the handle of the chokuto, "this sword."

He clenches the sheath, "I don't understand."

She sighs, "He meant it as an insult, because he believed my only purpose in life was to serve as shinobi of the Leaf. Without that, my life was worthless. My father expected me to kill myself with this sword, Sasuke. He gave me a sword that had been passed down our family for generations so I could die on it, and he could collect it from my corpse."

Sasuke kind of hates some of his family sometimes. "Why are you giving it to me?"

"Because you're going to be an amazing swordsman. You may even be better than me, and I'd love to be the one training you. But this isn't where you need to be right now, or where you want to be." He opens his mouth, but she shakes her head, "Natsu is alive. I know that quite well. I also know that wherever she goes, trouble follows."

"You want me to go after Naruto?" he asks, heartbeat ticking up because he would do anything to be by Naruto's side again.

"She never gave up on you," she tells him, "After the Massacre she took every patrol that went by the Uchiha district. She petitioned for you to graduate early at least a dozen times. She was ecstatic when they finally let you become a genin." She meets his gaze firmly, "I want you to do what you want to do. The chunin exams are coming. If you leave now you'll miss them."

Sasuke doesn't have to ask her what she would do, she just told him what she did. "Do you regret it?"

She smiles, the first Sasuke has ever seen from her, "Never. I'd do it again."

He swallows. He hasn't had the courage to ask this since the first time, but if ever there was time she'd answer him it's now. "Why didn't you come get me, after the Massacre?"

"Sasuke," she sighs, and there's another story he doesn't know here, because the grief in her eyes is suddenly much closer, much more personal, "a brothel is no place to raise a child."

"Naruto grew up here," he argues.

She shakes her head, "Naruto spent every day of his life wishing for a family."

"After the Massacre, so did I," he says, and he's absolutely going to be mortified about this later.

"Well," she says softly, "go get him then."

He grips the sword in one hand before bowing neatly at the waist. "I want you to know, Aunt Kiyomi, that I still consider you an Uchiha." He throws himself out the window before she can yell at him.

Because birth records were easy to find when you knew where to look, and it turned out that his grandmother did have a sister – Kiyomi Uchiha, his great-aunt.

He can't wait to tell Naruto about this.

It's easy enough to strap the sword to his back and throw clothes and rations into a pack. He doesn't have anything of real sentimental value. What takes longer is digging out the good paper and calligraphy pen, and writing out a document that he honestly should have done long before now. The jutsu to infuse the paper with his chakra is simple enough, and has been used by clan heads for generations. Even if his language isn't perfect, no one will question the validity of the claim.

He still has two more stops to make before he can leave the village. He's doesn't have to sneak onto the Inuzuka compound, and instead he just waves at the guard as he walk in. Sakura's already waiting for him outside of the Main Inuzuka House. "It's creepy how you always know when one of us is coming now," he tells her.

She rubs at her eyes, more asleep than awake. "It's not me, it's Paru."

"Your magical spirit wolf knowing doesn't make it any less weird," Kiba calls out, still in his pyjamas and being dragged toward them by Akamaru. "It's also weird that Paru talks to Akamaru. Sasuke, I hope you realize it's two in the morning."

He hadn't, actually. "Sorry."

"You're going after Naruto, aren't you?" Sakura asks. "It's either him or Itachi."

"It's Naruto," he admits.

"They're going to declare you a missing-nin," Kiba warns.

He shrugs, "I'm a genin who, as far as they know, hasn't even activated his bloodline limit. They'll give me a C rank at best. Do you know who goes after C rank missin-nin? Literally no one." He sobers, "I'm sorry about bailing on you guys for the chunin exams."

"It's okay," Sakura says, "I need more practice fighting with Paru anyway. Team Ten is just going to have to represent Konoha."

"You're a pretty terrible shinobi," Kiba adds, grinning, "choosing one person over your whole village."

Sakura smirks, "You should have been a samurai if you were going to go being loyal to a single person on us."

Sasuke rolls his eyes, "There's no reason to be rude about it. Samurai, tch."

Kiba claps Sasuke on the shoulder, "Be safe out there, okay? Write us letters."

"Don't get killed," Sakura adds, "There's lots of ninja that'll be pissed if you get killed. Us included."

He grins and pulls them both in for a quick hug, "Back at you."

He doesn't look back as he leaps away, but only because he knows that they'll be watching him. His last stop is important for a few reasons, and he taps on Kakashi's window until it slides open, "Sasuke?" Iruka says, startled, "Is something wrong?"

"Hey Iruka-sense," he says sheepishly, "I need to talk to Kakashi-sensei."

Iruka backs up and Sasuke slides in through the almost too-small window. Iruka ruffles his hair, "Be careful out there," and then leaves to go wake Kakashi.

Well. Apparently everyone but him knew he was going to end up leaving the village to go after Naruto.

Kakashi exits the bedroom still pulling up the mask. "Natsu?"

"You could at least pretend to be surprised," he says, holding out the document he'd just written up. Kakashi takes it. "That's my official recognition of Sai as a member of my clan, and naming him as clan head in my absence."

Kakashi raises an eyebrow, "That'll destroy all of his use as a spy."

Sasuke shrugs, "Natsu and I are going to be out of the village indefinitely. I'd feel better knowing Sai was out from under that asshole's thumb."

The jounin sobers and ruffles Sasuke's hair, "Be careful out there, all right? Make sure you and Naruto take care of each other."

"We will," he promises, "if you also swear to be careful. There are dangers inside the village too."

"I'll be careful," Kakashi says softly, "now go. The night guard will be changing watch soon."

Sasuke winks and slips back out his window. The moon is high, and he has lots of ground to cover before sunrise.

---

Sarutobi hasn't survived this long by being stupid. He looks up from the document reeking of Sasuke's chakra and says, "You're keeping secrets from me."

Kakashi doesn't flinch, "I thought you'd be happy. You've been looking for some sort of concrete reason to mess with Danzo's Anbu. Especially since we couldn't pin anything on the men that attacked Sakura."

"They weren't in the system," he repeats for possibly the hundredth times. Tsume has taken to berating him in her free time ever since the girl had joined her clan. It's exhausting.

The jounin snorts, "Right. Are you going to honor Sasuke's wishes? Genin or not, he's still the Uchiha clan head."

The old man leans back in his chair, "Sasuke isn't in the village anymore, is he?" Kakashi raises an eyebrow. "If he's not the in village, Danzo can't attempt to manipulate him further. So he left."

That's half the reason Kakashi hadn't tried to stop him. He's actually getting really sick of Danzo targeting the people he cares about. "That's possible," he allows, because as long as he keeps wording his responses carefully he can convince himself that he's not outright lying to his hokage.

"I don't like this," the Sandaime says finally.

"No one likes this," Kakashi slides Sasuke's paper closer to the hokage, "but all we can do now is make the best of a poor situation."

Sarutobi rubs at his temples, but Kakashi can tell that he's won.

---

On one hand, a chunin finding her father's rotting corpse stashed in the basement of the Kazekage tower means that at the very least Gaara won't be forced to kill the man himself.

On the other hand, it's moved up their timetable to literally right now, and Temari finds herself standing in an arena surrounded by her future council and jounin instead of on her way to Konoha to take the chunin exam.

"If you manage to defeat us all, you will be sworn in as Godaime Kazekage," the Shirogane clan head recites at her, "You are permitted a five minute break between every five opponents. If you fail, we will bury your body besides your father."

"You know," she says conversationally, unhooking her fan from her back, "in Konoha they just elect their Kages."

He smiles at her, "Sounds boring."

That's the last bit of talking they do. She defeats the first jounin in under a minute, but she's not fooled. They're sending in the weakest first to wear her down, like sand against stone. It's a fine strategy, except for one thing – she's neither sand nor stone.

She's wind.

---

When Naruto unravels the last bit of Orochimaru's seal, everything else falls into place. He's such an idiot for not figuring it out sooner.

"Danzo put it on him," he tells them all, nearly shaking he's so excited. It's the middle of the night, so the girls are all working, but everyone else is seated in the living room. "It's been him the whole time!"

Tsunade blinks, "What?"

Shizune frowns, "Why bother?"

"Your crazy councilman?" Zabuza asks, "I've heard rumors about that guy. Isn't he a dick?"

Gaara rubs at his forehead.

Haku, seated comfortably in the older ninja's lap, sighs. "Naruto, please start from the beginning."

Naruto runs his fingers through his hair, and it's grown out to his chest. He can't wait until it's back to how long it was before. "Okay, so the five point seal, right? It's powerful and all, it's what's used to keep demons contained. As far as I knew that's all it was used for, it's fairly susceptible to tampering and degrades if there's not a large enough chakra supply to support it – which for a juncchuriki obviously isn't a problem, but can get a bit tricky for everyone else. But when I took apart the Hyuuga seal, I found out that that the base design matrix was a five point seal."

Tsunade pales, "That's what the Curse Marks are using? That's ridiculous! They're added so young – there's no way people's chakra systems are developed enough to handle the strain."

"They're not," Naruto says seriously, "they decay and tear apart the nervous system while burning out the person's chakra coils. It's pretty nasty. Anyway! Before that I got my hands on a Root member, and the seal that's used to ensure their silence is also a five point. Slightly more elegant than the one used for the Hyuuga, so it takes longer for the seal to destabilize and start effecting the carrier. Considering how short the average Root member's life span is, I doubt it was ever an issue. Which brings us to Orochimaru," he points up at the ceiling to the room where the man is being kept.

"He also has a five point seal?" Shizune guesses.

Naruto deflates, "I – yeah. He does. I was going to build up to that reveal! Anyway, underneath all the frayed chakra strings and half collapsed connecting lines, there is indeed a five point seal. The really interesting part is that it's the Hyuuga seal, the Root seal, and a little something extra." He shakes his head, "It's the closest thing to a slavery seal I've seen. It incorporates mental and physical control all along with a failsafe that kills the person with the seal if they try to go against the wishes of the person who put the seal on them, but doesn't allow them to kill themselves. Which I'm sure was a bad enough strain on his chakra system when the seal was being actively maintained, but once it was left to degrade on its own it collapsed." He turns to Tsunade, "You said that Orochimaru started going nuts after he was passed over for Hokage, right? I think that's when Danzo stopped caring about the seal and left it to degrade."

"Wait," Zabuza glares, "What does Danzo have to do with this?"

"He's the one that's been making seals!" Naruto says, "It's obvious! He would have been a teenager when the Hyuuga first implemented the Curse Mark, just experienced enough with seals to make something effective but gruesome. Then by the time he'd started Root he'd refined it, made it better and more adaptable. By the time he got to Orochimaru, he was just skilled enough – likely with the help of a Yamanaka – to attempt to control him. Orochimaru was in Root for a while, right? I bet that's when Danzo got his claws into him! He thought the Sandaime was going to pick Orochimaru for hokage, so he devised a way to control the future hokage in a way he'd never managed to do with Sarutobi! But when he was passed over, Danzo had no reason to keep up the maintenance for the seal. The physical effects would have been bad, but the mental ones? Letting a mental seal decay means it literally would be eating away at his sanity."

"So you're saying," Tsunade says slowly, and this is too good to be true, it's all the things she's fantasized about wanting and hated herself for, "that the Orochimaru I've known for the past two decades isn't – isn't really him?"

"Sanity comes and goes, probably. But no. I don't think the man Danzo made him is the man he truly is." He hesitates, "It explains the body hopping too. You've seen the state his original body is in – it has to be painful. By switching bodies he could alleviate the physical effects of the seal, if not the mental ones." He stands in front of Tsunade, "I can remove the seal."

She looks up at him, and she looks small and lost and Naruto is so sorry that he's doing this to her. "You can?"

"Yes. I can remove the seal, and for better or worse it'll relieve the mental strain. But I can't heal the physical, I'm not a medic-nin. If I remove it, you're going to have to heal over thirty years' worth of damage on his body. Can you do that?"

Tsunade looks to Shizune. The younger woman nods, and when Tsunade looks back at Naruto there's a sureness and steel in her gaze that he hasn't seen before. "I'm Sannin Tsunade Senju. Bring it."

---

Sasuke enters the house that's neither the cleanest nor the dirtiest. He's only just stepped inside when a giggling redhead drapes herself across her shoulders. "Hi little boy," she says, pressing her ample breasts against him, "if you want, I can make you a man."

He holds out what's likely double or triple her rate, "Could we go somewhere more private?"

Her eyes widen and she quickly pockets the money, "Anything you want, honey." She drags him upstairs into a spare room. She slams the door shut, and then presses him up against it. She's got deceptive upper body strength. "Is it your first time, baby? What me to show you a good time?"

He gently pushes her away from him, and her eyes darken in wariness. He bows, keeping his hands where she can see them. "My lady, it's not your body I desire, although you are very beautiful. I'm looking for someone. I'm hoping you can help me find them."

"And if I can't?" she challenges, clenching a hand around the cash he'd handed her.

He inclines his head, "Then I insist that you keep the money in return for your time, and request you direct me to someone who may be able help me."

She stares at him for a long moment, searching. She relaxes and when she speaks it's without the airy tilt to her voice. "Tell me about them. I'll do my best."

Sasuke smiles.

---

They're in the middle of a field at the city's edge in an attempt to minimize collateral damage. Watching Naruto work is humbling and terrifying. Not even Jiraiya can untangle and dissolve chakra seals as easily as he does. She aches that Minato isn't able to see what his child has grown into, is still growing into.

Then there's no time to think at all, because Orochimaru's body is a broken thing. The nerves are fried, the lungs struggle to breath, and his heart only sluggishly beats. It was bad before without the seal to keep it together, but now she and Shizune race to heal his body before it can die on them.

It's the longest healing she's done in a while. It was still dark when they began, but when she blinks back to awareness her joints ache and the sun is high in the sky.

"Fourteen hours," Naruto says cheerfully, holding out a water bottle. "Shizune had to sleep after ten. I'm impressed."

"Her chakra stores aren't as large as mine," she explain, draining the water in one long pull.

"Few are," he agrees, swapping out her empty bottle for a full one. "Just one last thing."

She sips at this one, slower now. "Right." She places a hand on Orochimaru's head, and she's never been a religious woman, but she sends up a prayer before breaking the jutsu she'd been using to keep him in a coma.

At first nothing happens. The he opens his eyes, slowly, and his gaze meet hers. In that one moment she knows that they've been successful, because Orochimaru has always been curious and manipulative and powerful, but as a child he wasn't cruel, and it's that lack of cruelty shining in his eyes now that makes a smile break out across her face.

This is why she's not expecting him to lunge up into her and reach around under her jacket to grab at the kunai she keeps strapped to her hip, just where he suggested she keep it when they were kids. She holds up an arm to deflect the blow, but finds herself scrambling forward when instead he attempts to plunge the kunai into his own neck. "Stop it!" she jerks his arm back, "What are you doing!?" She forces the kunai from his hand and throws it out of reach. He dives for it, but Tsunade catches him by the waist and slams him into the ground.

"Kill me!" he demands, "If you don't want there to be blood then strangle me, but do it!"

Naruto looks between them both, eyebrows raised to his forehead.

"I'm not going to kill you!" He reaches for the kunai and she grabs his wrists and pins him to the ground. "Why would I kill you? I just saved you!"

"I don't know when it's coming back," he spits, "You have to do it now! I'm never this clear – I won't let you do it when I lose it again. You have to kill me now!" He struggles against her hold but can't throw her off, "For fuck's sake Tsunade, get off me and I'll do it myself!"

"What are you talking about?" she asks, and she thinks she knows, but she wants to hear him say it.

"I keep hurting people," he spits, "and you need to stop me! If the fucking seal would let me, I'd have done it myself years ago, but it won't so I need you to do it!" He swallows, "Hime, please, I'm begging you, and I don't beg. Kill me."

"You just talked about the seal," she tells him, and she can't tell if she's about to start laughing or crying. "You would have killed yourself if I hadn't stopped you. Orochimaru, it's gone. It's not controlling you anymore."

He goes slack under her, and his next phrase is slow and deliberate, "Danzo put a seal on me before I left Root." His eyes widen, "How?"

"That'd be me!" Naruto waves, "I took it off. Nasty piece of work."

His eyes narrow, "Natsu? I was coming to take your body."

He falters, "Ah. Do you still want to?"

"No, thank you," he sniffs, "It's quite a relief to be back in my own, actually."

"Why were you in your original body when you attacked?" Naruto asks, "It must have been painful."

"It's easier to transfer from my old one," he explains, still looking dazed, "I can jump from temporary body to temporary body, but the stretch becomes too long and they don't last as long. I was quite interested in your body lasting me a while."

Naruto blinks. "That's really creepy."

"I'm aware," he drawls. He looks up at Tsunade, "I don't suppose you're willing to let me up?"

"Are you going to try to kill yourself?" she asks. He sighs but shakes his head. She cautiously get off of him, and pulls him up with her.

Of course, this is when Jiraiya finally takes the moment to arrive by body flickering into the field and punching Orochimaru in the face. "GET AWAY FROM TSUNADE, BASTARD!" He pulls out a shuriken, ready to throw it into Orochimaru's skull.

Tsunade moves to stop him, but before she gets the chance he crumples to the ground, revealing a dark haired boy who'd apparently knocked him out by hitting him with the butt of a sword.

"Sasuke!" Naruto yells, "What are you doing here!?"

Sasuke throws the sword onto his back and crosses his arms. He looks from the sannin to Naruto and says, "I don't know why I'm even surprised, honestly."

"Are the others with you? Is something wrong?" he asks, marching up the boy.

Sasuke reaches out and pulls Naruto close enough that their foreheads touch. "Everyone's fine," he says, "You didn't really think I'd let you go off to fight a war on your own, did you?" He tugs on Naruto's ponytail, "I'm not about to let you do something this stupid alone."

Naruto softens, "You shouldn't be here. It's not safe."

"No where's safe," he rolls his eyes, "but here has you, which is all that matters to me." He cups Naruto's jaw, "Can I kiss you now?"

Naruto doesn't answer, instead ducking that much closer to seal their lips together.

Tsunade looks to Orochimaru, who shrugs. "I'm just as confused as you are."

"How did you know Naruto was going by Natsu?" she asks, choosing to ignore the two teenagers making out in front of them.

He winces, "I may or may not have a sleeper agent inside Konoha who reports back to me. Or several, actually."

"YOU WHAT?" she screams.

Naruto and Sasuke don't even pause.

Orochimaru looks at her reproachfully, "I'm not going to tell you things if you yell at me for them."

She wants a refund. She forgot how much of a brat Orochimaru was when he wasn't psychotic.

---

The Konoha genin minus Sasuke are gathered at the Inuzuka compound.

"I think I get why your dad drinks so much," Shikamaru mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Ino shrugs, "Because he's a wimp? Come on, this isn't that bad. We all knew that Sasuke was going to go after her."

"I was hoping," he groans, "that it would be after the chunin exam."

All the genin exchange glances. "Why?" Lee asks when it's clear no one else knows either.

"Because now we're going to be the only Konoha genin team in the exam. So we actually have to pass. Do you know how pathetic it would be if Konoha's one team of genin didn't get promoted? This is awful. I don't want to be a chunin. Once I'm a chunin I'll have to start doing patrols," Shikamaru crosses his arms, "Troublesome."

It's times like these that Shino's actually grateful he was put on a team with the Hyuuga sisters.

---

Jiraiya is going to march back to Konoha and strangle his sensei just as soon as all the information he just got stops making his head spin. "So Naruto, you've been alive this whole time pretending to be a girl –"

"She wasn't pretending," Sasuke interrupts, "She was a girl."

He stares. "Right. So you were Natsu Nami, the seal master Sarutobi was trying to get me to train. And you," he points to Orochimaru, who after his intense healing session with Tsunade and a shower looks closer to his friend than the insane missing-nin, "have been under a mind control jutsu for two decades."

"It wasn't mind control," he says, and no one else would be able to tell anything else was wrong, but he grew up with the bastard and he almost looks – haunted. "I was still me, more or less, in the beginning. But then the as seal frayed I became – less stable. Almost a form of schizophrenia. On my better days, I knew what I was going wasn't right, wasn't what I wanted to be doing. On my worst days, I knew and didn't care."

"You left on one of your better days, didn't you?" Tsunade asks.

He looks away, "If I couldn't stop what I was doing, I could at least stop who I was doing it to. I – there were moments of clarity, but what I was thinking and what I was doing never managed to match up. I kept hoping someone would notice, but," he shrugs, mirthless, "you'd both left the village at that point, and Sensei was busy."

"We should have noticed," Jiraiya says darkly, "If we had –"

Orochimaru places a hand on Jiraiya's arm, his skin smooth and cool to the touch like it's always been, "Don't do that. Leaving was the right decision. The farther I got from Danzo, the less pull his chakra had on mine. It slowed down the process quite a bit."

"You can go back now," Tsunade says, "we'll go with you, we'll explain everything to Sensei."

He runs his hand through his hair, "I can't. I have responsibilities. I should probably be heading back, actually."

"Responsibilities?" Jiraiya sputters, "What the hell could you have to do that's so important you can't come home?"

"Oh, didn't you hear?" he grins, and he's got the same look on his face from when they were twelve and he'd easily mastered another jutsu Jiraiya was struggling with, "I started my own hidden shinobi village. I'm a kage." He studies his nails, "Always falling behind, aren't you Jiraiya?"

"Uh," Sasuke raises his hand, "if you're the kage of a village, shouldn't you be there?"

That's another crack in Orochimaru's veneer, and Jiraiya wants to go back to Konoha and strangle Danzo for doing this. "I leave whenever I start – hurting people. It's okay. They've gotten used to it."

"So," Naruto says, "you don't have to, you don't owe me or anything. But since I did do you a favor, do you want to do me one?"

He raises an eyebrow, "Such us?"

"I'm taking over Kiri, putting a new Mizukage in power, and then causing a coup of the Water royal family," he says, "You in?"

Orochimaru snorts, "Well when you put it like that, how can I refuse?"

"I'm not letting you out of my sight," Tsunade says to him, "So I'm coming too."

Jiraiya crosses his arms, because if his teammates think they're leaving him behind when they go to start a war they've lost it. "Me too."

"Great!" Naruto chirps, flipping up so he's doing a handstand on Sasuke's head.

Jiraiya can't believe this kid is the next great seal master.

---

The note he receives from Orochimaru stating that he's joined up with Natsu to take Kiri should absolutely be the strangest thing, or even the line after that telling him to track down Itachi Uchiha to teach him the Mangekyo healing jutsu, but instead he find his eyes lingering on the last bit.

I'm gratified by your loyalty.

A strange combination of affection and devotion surges in his chest. Orochimaru-sama and Natsu are working together, he doesn't have to choose.

Maybe he'll go find Hana and ask her to dinner. Today seems like a day for miracles.

Elsewhere in the village, Anko is running through her taijutsu katas when there's a shift of familiar chakra. She's never had the heart to end her contract with the snakes, training with the creatures are some of the best memories she has, but those memories are a double edged sword, and she can't bear to summon them more than necessary.

She recognizes the chakra though, and crouches down to the small mamba that's slithering towards her. "Miki," she says, recognizing the odd diamond pattern on her head, "is something wrong? What are you doing here?"

"You bled for our contract," the snake hisses, "you should use us more." Anko winces, but knows for a fact the uppity little snake didn't come all this way to berate her. She holds out her tail to Anko, depositing a scroll in her hand. "He at least hasn't forgotten about us." She dismisses herself with an arrogant toss of her head.

Anko stares down at the scroll in her hand, and it's soaked in Orochimaru's chakra. She should absolutely hand it over to the hokage, her old sensei had made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with her, he was a terrible man and a missing-nin of her village who hurt people, who tortured them, and she should hate him for what he's done.

Never mind that he took her under his wing as a lone Academy graduate, that he dressed her wounds, taught her almost everything she knows, never mind that he never hurt her, not until that day she can't remember. Never mind that he cared for her in a way she'd wanted all her life, never mind that he's the closest thing she's ever had to a parent.

She opens the scroll.

Anko,

I did not leave you behind. I asked you to come with me, and you refused to betray Konoha.

You made the right decision. I'm proud of you.

Your Sensei

She doesn't realize she's crying until she's buried her face in her knees, clutching the note to her chest. Orochimaru is proud of her.

It shouldn't mean anything. It means everything.

---

There's a knock at her door. "Come in," Ren looks up from her accounting book, and isn't surprised to see Naruto on the other side. "Got everything sorted out?"

"Yeah," he sits in the chair across from her, fidgeting in a way she's not used to seeing from him. "We're heading out tomorrow."

She leans back in her chair, "Well, I'll be sorry to see you go. Your entourage on the other hand," she shrugs. "You found what you were looking for?"

He nods, and swallows. "I want to offer you something, as a thank you for everything you've done."

"This wasn't a favor," she reminds him, "I'll collect one day."

"I know," he almost smiles, "and this isn't payment. But," he pulls a letter from his pocket and hands it to her. "This is a letter of introduction. If you want, if you're willing to make the journey, Madame Koi of Konoha's Flower District will take you on." Ren stares down at the unassuming letter in her hands, and she doesn't know what the look on her face is, but whatever it is causes Naruto to babble, "You're good, you're mostly trained already. You can take your girls with you if you want, and I know it's a step down, to go from a Madame to a courtesan again. But being Koi opens up a lot of doors, and Madame Koi will take you on if I ask her to. You don't have to. But if you want," he shrugs, helpless. "You're the best, Ren. We like the best to belong to us, you know? You can do a lot with Koi training to back you up."

"Naruto," she says, a smile breaking out over her face, "Thank you."

She'd never dreamed she'd get this opportunity. This more than makes up for every incredibly dangerous shinobi under her roof.

She and her girls are going to be Koi. Leaving her business and steady income behind is a risk, but growth requires risk. She's ready to grow.

---

Naruto has already shifted back to Natsu for sleeping purposes when there's a knock on her door.

"Sasuke," she grins, stepping aside to let him in. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to say goodnight," he says, but he's frowning. He reaches out a hand, delicately twisting her hair around his finger, "You know that I don't care what you look like, right? I don't care if you're a boy or a girl, or anything like that. You can do whatever you want."

"Okay?" Natsu says warily.

"Have you tried being a girl while still looking like – you? Like Naruto?" he asks hesitantly, "If you like how Natsu looks, that's fine too. But you don't have to look like someone else anymore. Not if you don't want to."

She hasn't thought about it, actually. She's just always looked like this when she's done the Oiroke, but she thinks back to the very first time she did the technique, before she figured out to change the things that people would recognize her by. There's a quick pop of chakra, and her hair is sunshine yellow and her eyes a bright blue. Her face shape is a bit broader, but still clearly feminine. Sasuke smiles and cups her face to rub his thumb over her whisker marks. "How do I look?" she asks.

"Gorgeous," he says, dark eyes soft. "How does it feel?"

"I like it," she decides, even though she hasn't even looked in the mirror yet. She got her hair and her eyes from her father, and like her name she's invested in reclaiming these things too. She's glad Sasuke thought to point it out to her. "Did you really come just to say goodnight?"

He takes a half step closer, "If that's all you wanted me to come for, then yes."

Naruto giggles and leaps onto Sasuke, wrapping her legs around his waist. He backs up until she can pin him against the wall, and ducks down to kiss him. He holds her easily, and hesitantly reaches under her shirt to run his hands against the skin of her back. He doesn't try for anything farther, even though Naruto wouldn't stop him, has done more than this with people who meant a lot less to her than Sasuke, and she doesn't think she'll ever tire of how Sasuke makes her feel safe and respected and loved.

---

When the news reaches them that Sasuke Uchiha is now a missing-nin of Konoha, Itachi has to take a deep breath to keep from tearing his hair out.

Next time he sees Naruto he's going to strangle her.

---

"This is so undignified," Orochimaru sniffs, hands tucked into the wide sleeves of the short purple kimono he'd bought at the market. Jiraiya absolutely plans on making fun of him for it later.

They're all piled in the back of topless wagon on that's headed in the direction of Kiri with an extremely nervous driver up front.

"I've been in worse," Zabuza shrugs, Haku curled up against his side.

"I think it's nice," Shizune adds, because the last thing she wants is a fight breaking out.

Gaara rubs the sweat from his brow with a disdainful flick, "Yes. Nice." He can't wait to be back in a desert. Naruto snorts, and Sasuke quirks his lips up at the corners.

"I have to ask," Jiraiya says, leaning into Orochimaru's space, "why is it the Village Hidden in Sound? How do you even hide in sound? What does music have to do with rice?"

"I like music," he says. After a moment, it's clear that that's his answer to all three questions.

"That's it?" Tsunade asks, "Really?"

He shrugs, "What was I supposed to call it? The Village Hidden in the Marsh? That's a terrible name."

"You were a pretty good singer," Jiraiya concedes.

Orochimaru scoffs, "I'm still a great singer, thank you. Unlike you, you tone deaf buffoon, I have perfect pitch."

"Oh really?" the toad sannin challenges, "Prove it."

"Do you seriously expect me to burst into song?" he asks.

Tsunade starts clapping, a slow easy beat. Zabuza begins stomping counter to it, and Orochimaru glares at them both. "Come on," Jiraiya nudges his shoulder. "You're the Otokage. Put your money where your mouth is."

He scowls, but after a moment more he clears his throat. Orochimaru's voice is a clear, bright tenor that cuts through the air around them, and Naruto recognizes the song as a lover's ballad that Madame Koi would hum sometimes when he was kid. Everyone settles, becoming entranced, because Orochimaru is in fact an amazing singer.

Sasuke holds out his hand palm up, and Naruto smiles and threads their fingers together. Sasuke leans his head on Naruto's shoulder, and separated from his village and most his friends Naruto's still so happy in this moment that he could burst.