Chapter 2: It's You

For the entirety of that following Sunday morning and afternoon, Chandler kept silent and tried to act as though everything was normal.

It was quite the strenuous effort, not to outwardly show the panic that he was normally so good at espousing. It was hard enough not to let paranoia set in: did Ross know? Did Monica know? Had she been awake or truly asleep during their encounter? It was difficult to tell.

From how flushed the apples of her cheeks were, from the bright smile on her face, Chandler had to wonder if she had been awake while they made love. Monica kept chittering to Rachel, who seemed out of it, staring with dull eyes while working off a massive hangover. Chandler was pretty confident the blonde had slept through everything that had passed between Monica and him… and even if Rachel hadn't, it was doubtful she would remember everything that had occurred at the mixer of afterwards.

For Rachel, it came down to a question of what she remembered and what she didn't. For Monica, last night came down to what had been a dream and what hadn't. Either her first time was real, or she had dreamt so lucidly that her handsome midnight kisser and paramour seemed all but real.

"He was passionate, yet gentle…." Monica was insisting to Rachel. "He was wild, yet tame…" There was something enraptured to her sparkling sapphire eyes, and she even sighed a little. Ross seemed appropriately grossed out.

"Didn't really wanna hear about my sister's wet dreams, man," he grumbled to his best friend. Chandler just nodded along with a tight smile.

By the time evening was approaching, and the girls were preparing to drive back to Long Island, Chandler was beginning to panic. Far more crucial than whether Monica had been aware enough to determine whether she had been awake or asleep for their rendezvous was what her state of wakefulness (or perhaps lack of it) said about her consent. Would she have been such an active participant if she had been conscious enough to know she was awake? Chandler wasn't sure. If Monica thought she was asleep, what would happen if she later came to the opposite conclusion? What, then?

From his point of view, it had seemed to Chandler that Monica had consented. He thought back to how she had touched his neck and pulled his mouth back down to hers. How she had wrapped her buxom thighs about his middle and felt up his butt. Chandler vividly remembered all of those things such that he could play it back like a movie in his head. She wouldn't have done any of those things if she hadn't wanted to be made love to, and to make love in return.

But had she been aware she had done those things? That's what made it tricky.

There was only one thing for it: he had to tell her what had happened.

So, it was, near sunset that Chandler took full advantage of Ross being distracted by saying goodbye to Rachel near the girls' car, and he took Monica aside.

"I had a really wonderful time, Chandler…" Monica expressed.

Chandler swallowed hard. "Believe me… so did I…."

They stood there for a moment awkwardly, Chandler trying to figure out how the hell to say what he needed to say. How to segue? Hey, remember when you were going on about having sex in your brother's dorm room? Well, funny story, that really did happen and that was me!

"How about a hug?" Monica nervously giggled, opening her arms to him. Chandler walked into the embrace, putting his arms around Monica with strength of affection that left her laughing awkwardly. Gazing down at her, Chandler swallowed hard. "Monica?"

"Yeah….?"

"Can…. Can I kiss you goodbye?" He whispered it.

Appearing taken aback, even a little baffled, Monica nonetheless nodded even as she blushed.

Once upon a time, as a little boy, he had asked his mother what caused people to fall in love the way they did in her stories. His mom had answered with some quibble about how 'love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,' and then explained that people could be attracted to each other due to beauty on the outside, yes… but she had always impressed upon her son that beauty was also found within.

True, she was heavier than most. Her face and her cheeks were plump. Yet what Chandler hadn't appreciated before was how the apples of those very cheeks could glow with her blush, making her seem like Mrs. Claus in a Christmas special. And he'd always much preferred Christmas over Thanksgiving.

Monica's eyes…. they sparkled like sapphires. Her smile…. It was always bright and sparkling, especially whenever she looked at him. It was the kind of smile that anyone would want bestowed on them, for it was the kind of smile that could warm someone up inside, like sunshine.

Her perm even made her look adorable. Sure, Chandler had sometimes wondered whether those dark, midnight tresses might be better served if Monica let them down, let her hair tumble down her back, but to each their own. Reaching out a hand, Chandler now twirled his fingers through some of those black strands bemusedly, almost skeptically. Sizing her up.

He took a deep breath. Beauty is found within. Well, so was courage too.

Slowly, Chandler brushed her midnight tresses back out of her face. Eyes darting to check that Rachel and Ross were too caught up in conversation that they weren't watching, he bent and softly kissed Monica right on the mouth.

He felt, heard her gasp with astonishment into his lips. It shocked them both to realize how the kiss, much like the one from last night, deepened. When they broke apart, Monica drew away looking stunned. She hardly noticed that a gawping Rachel and a furious looking Ross had spotted them kissing.

Monica was blinking rapidly. "You…. It was you!..." she breathed, somewhat in awe.

Chandler gulped. He was practically trembling in her arms as Monica reached up towards his face, and he braced himself for her to do something like slap him in righteous outrage.

Instead, she caressed his cheek. A dazed smile came over her lips, and the apples to her cheeks bloomed pink. "It was real…. I knew it was real!... You were my midnight mystery kisser? You were my first kiss ever?!" She gasped again. "You were my first time ever?!"

Chandler swallowed hard again. "I only meant to kiss you because I wanted to make you feel better after what that jerk Rick said to you. You…. you shouldn't be with someone like him. You…." He lifted his head to look her in the face. "You should be with me."

It was a rather bold, presumptuous thing to say, and yet Monica smiled gently at Chandler, amused and flattered. Glancing askance, Chandler chuckled. "I'm sorry that we got a little carried away."

Monica laughed and draped her arms languidly about his neck. "I'm not…." Swaying onto her tiptoes, she returned his kiss, good and proper.

When they broke the languorous kiss at last, Chandler peered into his lover's eyes again. What Chandler saw in those eyes now was nothing less than the truth.

Chandler still didn't know what he had done to deserve such love. Yet he recognized Monica and her love for the blessing it was.

"…. Do, um…. do you wanna be my girlfriend?" He couldn't quite believe he had managed to say it. At Monica's ecstatic blinking, he flushed. "It's just that…. when I'm with you, and when we're together…. Oh. My. God."

Monica just beamed; she looked quite adorable. "Really?..."

"Oh, Oh…. my God….."

Biting her lip, Monica nodded. She softly kissed him again.

"I'll call you," Chandler promised.

"Can't wait," Monica grinned. She headed for the car, ignoring Ross's outraged look and Rachel starting to pepper her with questions. At the passenger side door, she turned back. "Chandler?"

He glanced to her. Monica smiled.

"I love you," she whispered.

If said to him by anyone else, those three little words would have, should have, caused him to run screaming. But instead, Chandler gave her a tousled smirk. "… I know. I love you too."

He watched as the girls piled into Rachel's car, watched it speed off into the twilight until it was a speck in the distance. A giddy grin on his face, Chandler tuned out Ross's berating him and demanding to know what the hell happened, where the hell did this come from…..

Chandler barely knew himself. All he knew was that he wasn't about to let it go.

It would come as quite a shock at the holidays, when Chandler's girlfriend, the kid sister of his best friend, would come to him and, terrified, breathlessly tell him that she was pregnant with his child. That she was carrying his baby.

Now would have been the time to flee. But seeing Monica looking so scared, but also at the same time… oddly excited, Chandler knew what he must do. His mother had instilled it in him: take responsibility.

Shaking with nerves, Chandler somehow found the werewithal to get down on one knee before the Christmas tree in the Gellers' living room and ask Monica to marry him. He didn't have a ring, for which he apologized up front, but from the shining in her sapphire orbs, Monica didn't seem to mind.

"Yes…." Her voice held a dazed, exhilarated quality to it, even as she happily accepted.

Chandler felt terrible that Monica would have to defer the rest of her freshman year at culinary school to prepare for the baby. It was to the point that he made Monica promise that she would resume her studies after the baby was born. As for him, with two years still to go at Columbia, he would study from home with her and the baby, if he had to. Act as a commuter student. Ross could find another roommate… hopefully.

The pregnancy was difficult. Due to Monica's already husky weight, the baby was only causing its mother to gain that many more pounds. Ultrasound appointments warned against preeclampsia, a serious condition during pregnancy for women of Monica's girth. Chandler dutifully stayed by his fiancée's side, working to combat the anxiety creeping up on him.

The baby was born days after its father and uncle finished their sophomore year. A deliriously happy Monica made Chandler their son's namesake. At the end of the summer, the couple was married, and they bought a house together that was conveniently equidistant from Columbia and Monica's culinary institute.

Three Years Later

Monica Geller-Bing collapsed back down onto the hardwood, panting from the exertion. Her big, baby blues stared up at where her husband was dutifully holding her feet down.

"Come on, babe! Give me five more!"

"Chand-ler….. No….." Monica whined.

"Five more! If you can push our beautiful baby boy out of yourself, crunches should be nothing! Now, five more!"

"No!"

Chandler sat back, lips pursed in thought. He and Monica had been discussing having another baby, now that they both were fresh out of school. Chandler had agreed…. On the condition that Monica get into shape before they start trying. He would not run the risk of his wife having preeclampsia again during her pregnancy like she had while carrying their son, Chandler Bing Jr.

Monica gazed up at her husband, winded. She loved this man. Dear Lord, she loved this man. She had to decide that she had fallen in love with him the moment they met when Ross had brought him for Thanksgiving their freshman year. Their first night alone together in the boys' dorm room, making love, the surrender to her affection for him had been complete. She even knew that Chandler's heart was in the right place. But it didn't make much sense for her to shed all of this weight only to gain it all back while growing another baby inside of her.

"I'm just going to get big again," she pointed out. "My breasts are going to get bigger. My ass is going to get bigger…."

"…. And I don't think of you as a thin, beautiful woman, or as a large, beautiful woman. What I mean is, you're Monica, and I am in love with Monica."

"…. Keep going…." Monica grinned.

"So you can balloon up or shrink down and I will still love you."

"…. Even if I shrunk down to two inches tall?"

Chandler smirked. "I'd carry you around in my pocket."

Beaming, her sapphire eyes dancing, Monica reared up and pressed her lips to his in an earnest kiss.

"Good!" Chandler grinned, pleased with himself that he had actually tricked her into doing a crunch. "Now do five more, and I'll give you a work-out you'll really like."

"…. One….!" Monica grunted, lifting herself into a sit-up. Chandler sat back on his haunches, smug and vindicated. He was proud of how she managed to do all five, if also a little surprised at how she had the energy to pop up and drag him towards their bedroom.

"…. All I'll say is, if your boobs are still bigger than mine by the time I pop out another kid, I'm going home to my old room at Mom and Dad's!"

Chandler just laughed, catching his wife around her middle and carrying her off towards their bed. Before long, her happy squeals had turned into pleasured moans as husband and wife made love while their baby son slept.