"We're not following them back there. It's a trap!" Tonks shouted.
Rachel fired another Stunning spell at the moving Death Eaters and found that she was a little disoriented. They had started out nearly a house on a rural roadway and the Death Eaters had been steadily retreating down the road. But now there was a building, with an arch over the doorway, and she didn't think it had been there until now.
"Damn it, we're under anti-apparition wards!" Johansen called. "Group up!"
Rachel took a brief moment to check on the group. She and Tonks were in the middle. Curving forward to her left was Johansen, Jasmine, and Ralph. To her right was Draco and Ron, with Miles and Emelia to the far right.
"We need to fall back," Tonks said to Rachel, trying to stun a Death Eater that was pressing forward.
Rachel dodged the light of a Killing Curse and refocused on the Death Eater who seemed to be leading the group. They'd been harrying Rachel and Tonks with Killing Curses for the last ten minutes or so. "How?" Rachel asked, casting back another Stunning Spell, which fizzled uselessly against their shield.
"Slowly, as a group," Tonks said. "We need out of the anti-apparition ward. This was a trap. I'm not going to let them kill you."
She dodged again, not bothering to shield in case it was another Killing Curse.
"Move together!" Johansen called. "Bletchley, bring your side back! You're getting cut off!"
Rachel looked in Miles' direction and saw that they were being separated. She managed to take a Death Eater in the side with the Stunning Spell and ducked as a Killing Curse was sent in her direction.
"Rachel," a female voice called.
It wasn't a voice Rachel recognized. Confused, Rachel looked around, holding her wand ready to cast.
"Rachel, no," Tonks said urgently. It was light enough by the moon and stars that Rachel could see that Tonks now looked on the verge of panic.
"Rachel! Over here!"
Rachel looked and saw that the leader of the group had taken off their hood and mask. It was Bellatrix Lestrange.
"I was there that night," Bellatrix called.
"Don't listen to her. Fall back!" Johansen called. "It's a trap."
It was definitely a trap.
"I was there that night your aunt and uncle were killed. I saw them writhing! Why don't you join them?"
"Liar!" Rachel shouted as she dodged the red light of the Cruciatus. She sent three Stunning spells in quick succession at Bellatrix, but she knocked them away with her shield.
"Don't you want revenge? Your schoolmates, I killed them too," Bellatrix called as she backed up to the doorway of the building. The battle continued around them.
The bad thing was that Rachel was at least a little bit tempted to follow and stop Bellatrix from hurting anyone else, even though she knew Bellatrix hadn't been there when her relatives had died. She took a quick assessment of the battle. There were five Death Eaters still casting, the rest were down. All of her team was on their feet. If she could prevent Bellatrix from leaving, they might be able to capture her. The odds weren't uneven yet.
Rachel took a glance up, but didn't see the Dark Mark. There was a good chance the anti-apparition wards were keeping everyone here, rather than just their team. The only exit point for Bellatrix was that doorway. Rachel moved as if she was trying to cast at Bellatrix in order to get her to shield and not cast at her, but jerked her wand to the side and cast a Bludgeoning hex to collapse the archway behind Bellatrix.
The next three seconds seemed to last for full minutes as Rachel stood with her wand pointed. Bellatrix had dodged rather than shielded, and stepped directly into the path of Rachel's spell. There was a quiet crack and then a thump as Bellatrix hit the ground under the archway.
There was a moment of ringing silence around her and Rachel felt Tonks grab her by the shoulder and pull her out of the way of a Killing Curse.
Rachel went down on one knee and reflexively pointed her wand in the direction the curse had come from and cast the Stunning spell. The Death Eater, clearly not expecting that Rachel would respond, was hit and fell.
The battle continued for maybe five more minutes, Rachel working automatically to keep herself alive, but finally all the Death Eaters were down. So much for retreating.
She walked toward the building, wand hanging by her side as she wound up on a path and then on the stone steps leading into the building.
Bellatrix was splayed awkwardly on the steps, her neck at a very unnatural angle. She was missing a chunk of her chest and blood was pooling beneath her and starting to seep out from under her body.
Rachel cast the standard diagnostic charm. There was no response. She cast it again, wondering why it wasn't working. And then again.
"Rachel," Tonks said, her hand on Rachel's wand arm. "Diagnostics don't respond to dead bodies."
She exhaled. Dead bodies. She had killed Bellatrix. She turned and found that Draco and Ron had joined them and Johansen was approaching.
"We've got seven prisoners," Johansen said. "No one notable except-" He nodded at Bellatrix's body.
"We need Shacklebolt. We need to figure out what this building is and what it's doing here. We need the on-call aurors. I'm not sending the team into a potentially trapped building. We need someone with curse breaking experience," Tonks said.
"I'll have the team gather up the prisoners. The anti-apparition ward didn't fall. We'll have to see how far it stretches," Johansen said.
Tonks nodded. "I'll message Kingsley and we'll get more aurors on site."
"Malfoy. Weasley. With me," Johansen said.
"Here, come sit down for a moment," Tonks said, still holding Rachel by the arm. She guided her over to the far side of the steps. "Put your head between your knees if you're dizzy."
Rachel didn't feel dizzy. She felt…blank. She kept looking at Bellatrix's body, trying to make it make sense. She had cast the Bludgeoning hex to cut off Bellatrix's escape. Bellatrix had stepped into the spell. Surely not on purpose. She'd dodged Rachel's spell. What had she thought Rachel was casting that she didn't shield? Rachel supposed there was no way to know that.
"We need…basically everyone," Tonks was telling her jack rabbit Patronus. "We've got a mysteriously appearing building here and we had an incident. Dead Death Eater. There are anti-apparition wards. We need the full on-call aurors, plus someone with curse breaking experience. I'm not sending any of our new teams into the building; they don't have the training for that. Let me know when to expect you so we don't come out firing spells. Everyone here is a little bit jumpy."
Rachel took slow breaths as she watched Tonks' jack rabbit bound away.
Johansen returned. "I've got everyone ready to go. Are you staying? There could be more Death Eaters in there."
"I'm staying. I don't want this building to disappear again," Tonks said.
Johansen turned and looked at the team. "Keep Malfoy then."
"Not Malfoy. This is his aunt. I don't want him sitting here with her body. Give me Bletchley," Tonks said.
Johansen looked at Tonks for a long moment. "Want to trade? You can take them back."
"No, I'm here," Tonks said firmly.
Rachel blinked a few times and remembered. Bellatrix was Draco and Tonks' aunt. She'd killed Tonks and Draco's aunt. She'd killed Sirius' cousin.
"Want me to take Snow?" Johansen asked.
Tonks gave the door a wary look. "Up to her."
"I'll stay," Rachel said. She didn't feel quite ready to move just yet.
"Alright. Keep someone on that door," Johansen said. "Bletchley, you're with Tonks and Snow!"
Miles came over and joined them, getting a good look at Bellatrix and then looking at Tonks. "Should we do something with her body? Cover it or something?"
Tonks shook her head. "Leave it alone until Shacklebolt has seen it. Stay on alert. There might still be Death Eaters in the building."
"Does the spell to reveal a human presence work through walls?" Rachel asked.
"No, it doesn't, but we could open the door and fire it off a few times," Miles said.
Tonks eyed the door again. "Check for spells on it. I'm willing to bet that it's cursed to hell and back."
Miles went up the steps and started twitching his wand. "Yeah, no. We need a curse breaker before we go any further."
"That's what I thought," Tonks said.
"You alright, Rachel?" Miles asked.
"Working on it," Rachel said, though for the moment she was kind of just letting herself float. "I'm sorry about your aunt, Tonks. I wasn't trying to kill her."
"I know you weren't," Tonks said. "No need to apologize. I kind of suspected that Bellatrix wasn't going to let us take her alive. I think she'd do anything to avoid being sent back to Azkaban again. Besides, I barely knew her. My mom was barely speaking to anyone in the family by the time I was born. I met Bellatrix maybe twice when I was a kid, before she was sent to Azkaban. Every other time I've seen her has been during a battle."
"Families are hard," Miles said quietly.
Rachel nodded and looked at Bellatrix's body again. Somehow she felt if she looked at her long enough, she would understand.
Kingsley's lynx Patronus stalked up to them. "I'm here with Weir and Jenkins. We have three more aurors incoming. I'm going to have someone try to take down this ward."
"What are they going to do?" Miles asked.
"Secure the area, then we'll tackle the building. Possibly an empty base. Possibly something more," Tonks said, glancing at the door again.
They waited another ten minutes or so, Rachel recognizing that she was chilled in the early March air, but also feeling that was okay. She felt chilled inside, so feeling chilled outside wasn't too bad.
Kingsley, Weir, and Jenkins appeared in the darkness and approached the building.
"Not under the Fidelius charm," Jenkins said as he looked around. "You said it mysteriously appeared?"
"It wasn't here one moment, was here the next," Tonks said. "That counts as mysteriously appearing for me."
Kingsley looked down at Bellatrix's body. "Bludgeoning hex?" he asked.
"Yes," Rachel said.
He gave Rachel a long look and then motioned Tonks' to follow him. Tonks did and they stopped a few steps away and conferred inside a privacy ward.
Weir stepped up to the door and started making motions with his wand. "Either they really don't want us to go in or they really do want us to go in. This has trap written all over it."
"That's what we thought," Miles said.
"Has anyone walked around the building yet?" Weir asked.
"Not yet, we were a little busy with the Death Eaters," Miles said.
"How many did you get?" Jenkins asked.
"Including her," Miles said, nodding at Bellatrix, "eight."
"Big haul. Why were they staying to be captured?" Jenkins asked.
"They were trying to lead us into a trap. Apparently they wanted that more than they wanted to get away," Miles said with a shrug. "I'm not sure they could get out of the anti-apparition ward either. It wasn't set up using the Dark Mark."
"Snow, with me," Kingsley called.
Rachel got to her feet and began walking with Kingsley. "I really wasn't trying to kill her," she began.
"I know. Hold onto your thoughts for a moment," Kingsley said.
"Where are you taking me?" she asked.
"Back to the MLE. Robards will ask you a few questions, then you'll be on administrative leave until we sort everything out," Kingsley said.
"How will everything be sorted out?" she pressed.
"We'll take statements from everyone who saw what happened. You'll be cleared, don't worry about it. It just takes a week or so to have everything put together and reviewed."
Rachel supposed that was better than letting aurors kill with impunity but it didn't exactly sit well with her either. She had killed someone. She had killed someone? Somehow this didn't feel anything like killing the Dark Lord.
"I'm going to set you up to speak with one of the MLE Mind Healers on Monday," Kingsley said. "It takes time. Did you talk to someone after the battle at Hogwarts?"
"Yes," Rachel said.
"Good. Same thing here. You killed an enemy combatant," he said steadily. "Take your time with it."
Rachel didn't feel like she was about to have a breakdown, but she wasn't sure what she felt either. She supposed that feeling would come with time, whatever it was. For now she just had to get through whatever was going to happen next.
Rachel stumbled as she came out of the floo and into the sitting room. She found Draco sitting on one of the sofas, still in his MLE robes. They looked at each other for a long moment, the crackling fire the only sound in the room.
"You alright?" he asked.
"Not sure yet," she said after a moment. She went to the sofa and sat on the opposite end. "I'm sorry I killed your aunt."
"I only have one memory of my aunt and I'm absolutely fine with you killing her. I would have done it myself given the opportunity."
"Draco," Rachel said, more surprised than admonishing.
Draco turned and looked at her. "Do you really want to hear about me meeting my aunt? Because it was that night at the manor. Do you really want to hear that?"
Rachel had no idea what she was supposed to say. "I mean, if you want to talk about it, I'm here for you."
He shook his head. "No, I don't want to talk about it. I would honestly like to forget that night ever happened. If I could have one of the Unspeakables take that night from my memory for good, I would."
"It won't help," Rachel said. "Don't you think that I would have done that for that night, and for the memories from my childhood, if I could? Severus says that I'd still be messed up over it, I'd still have the anxiety and the nightmares and the tremors, I just wouldn't know why."
Draco exhaled. "Really?"
"That's what he said, I've never tried it. Not on purpose anyway."
He looked at her again. "What the hell does that mean?"
"Don't tell anyone, alright?" she asked. "I mean anyone."
"Alright," he said, now sounding uncertain.
"In sixth year I screwed up with my mind magic and blocked off my emotional reaction to what happened that night. Remember how I was out of classes for a week?"
He nodded.
"It nearly killed me. It could have left me with brain damage. And it really didn't help either. Even though I blocked that memory, I was still messed up," she explained.
"Shit," Draco said quietly. "I knew you were sick, you came back all spooked so I figured it had been bad, but I didn't know you had almost died."
"So yeah, don't try to mess with your memory of that night. Use my personal experience to make better choices than me."
Draco's mouth twitched like he wanted to say something, but whatever it was, he kept it to himself.
"I really am sorry, Draco. You shouldn't have had to see that. I wasn't trying to kill her. She stepped into my spell," Rachel said, feeling like she needed to explain herself.
"I know. I saw. I saw what you were trying to do. You were trying to stop her from opening that door and releasing reinforcements while we were trapped under an anti-apparition ward. I don't blame you, Rachel. She should have shielded, but she reacted like you were casting a lethal spell."
Apparently she had been casting a lethal spell. Her stomach lurched slightly as she remembered seeing the angle of Bellatrix's neck. "I was trying to stop her from escaping through that door. I figured if we could stop her, we weren't outnumbered. I should have just let her retreat."
"She was taunting you, trying to get you to come closer. It was reasonable that you wanted to stop her," Draco said.
That wasn't a reason to kill someone. "She was lying. She wasn't there the night my relatives were killed. I don't even know if she was at the battle at Hogwarts."
"How fucked are you with Robards and Kingsley?"
"They want to interview people who were there. Kingsley thinks I should be cleared to come back in a week or two."
"Do you even want to come back?"
Rachel considered that. "Don't know yet. I'm not…I haven't reacted to this yet, so I'm not sure how I'm going to feel about it."
Draco's brow furrowed. "How the hell does that work?"
"Don't you ever feel like you can't feel anything, but you know that you'll feel something about it later?" she asked. She thought everyone worked like that.
"No. I usually know what I feel when I'm feeling it." He frowned at her. "You're not freaking out? Is this a freaking out thing, like Jonas did?"
"No. At least not right now. Might be upset later." She should be upset. She had killed someone. She needed to feel something about that. All she'd felt about killing the Dark Lord had been relief, but that was different. For one thing, she hadn't meant to kill Bellatrix, which was worse. At least if she meant to kill someone it would have come from a rational decision that it was the only option.
Draco eyed her. "Well. Let me know then. Do you want someone to sit with you?"
"Up to you," Rachel said. She didn't think she was going to sleep, but she thought she'd be alright on her own.
He continued sitting. "This is going to be news, you know. Probably too late for the Daily Prophet, but they'll have an evening issue for sure."
Rachel sighed. She hadn't thought that far ahead yet. "I can imagine Rita Skeeter practically jumping for joy as she decides what to write about me. The headline is going to be something like 'The Girl-Who-Killed' or some nonsense."
"Probably. You might want to talk with Sirius before he sees it in the paper. Professor Snape too, I don't think he'd fancy learning this from the Prophet. Neville, of course."
She hadn't thought about that yet either. She'd killed Sirius' cousin, when he barely had any family left. She thought she knew him well enough to predict that he wasn't going to be overly upset about it, but still. She was part of his family. Severus would probably not be pleased for different reasons. She anticipated that he would ask her to leave the aurors. As for Neville, she had no idea. She thought he might be glad that the woman who tortured his parents was dead, but she also knew emotions around that sort of thing weren't always straightforward. They did deserve to know, so she would tell them.
"It was an accident," she said again. She didn't know why she felt the need to keep coming back to that, other than wanting people to know she hadn't purposefully killed someone. She wasn't like that.
"Look at it this way. She was trying to kill you. I saw her cast the Killing Curse at you more than once. You had every right to defend yourself. In fact, as an auror, you have a duty to defend yourself and your team, and that's what you were doing," Draco said.
Was stopping someone from retreating defense? She didn't know about that; it sounded flimsy to her. She supposed she had all night to try to figure it out.
"I'm going to go get cleaned up," Draco said when sunlight started coming through the sitting room window.
Rachel felt like she'd barely been aware of the night passing. At some point Feverfew had come downstairs and settled against her side. She didn't feel that she had come to any conclusions other than the idea that she felt vaguely guilty and that she should have simply let Bellatrix retreat and then the team could have retreated.
"Rachel?"
"Yes," she said, turning to look at him.
"I'm going to go shower. Are you alright for a bit?" he asked, looking intently at her.
"Sure. I need to shower and change too." She was still in her MLE robes, as was Draco. "I've got to move. Go have Dobby feed you breakfast," she told Feverfew.
Feverfew hopped off the sofa and left the room with her tail held high.
"How sure are you that cat isn't an animagus in disguise?" Draco asked.
"I'm sure. I used the spell to reveal animaguses on her shortly after we got her, just in case. She's just smart. Millie thinks she might be three quarters kneazle instead of half." Rachel stood.
"Just as long as you checked," he said.
"Would we have even been able to bring her into a Fidelius charmed location if she was human? Severus didn't tell her the secret."
Draco stood for a moment, looking thoughtful. "Well, the secret is that we live at this address. So as long as she doesn't know the address, I don't see that it stops her from being inside the house. It's an interesting loophole."
It was interesting and Rachel decided they'd have to be careful about who they let near their home. They went upstairs, Rachel breaking off on the first floor to go to her bedroom while Draco continued up the stairs. She took clean clothes from her wardrobe, not bothering with robes since it was a Saturday and she didn't have the Wizengamot today.
She took a quick look in the mirror when she went into the bathroom. She still looked roughly like herself. Was she a murderer? Did it count as murder if it was an accident? Even though Robards had assured her that there wasn't going to be a legal problem, Rachel half felt that there should be. She had killed someone and everyone was acting like that wasn't a big deal.
After showering and changing she went back downstairs and found that the Daily Prophet had arrived. She skimmed the first few pages, but found no mention of herself or Bellatrix. It was a relief that the news hadn't broken yet. She wanted to be the one to tell Sirius and Severus.
"Miss wants breakfast?" Kreacher asked.
"No, thank you," Rachel said. She didn't feel like eating at the moment. She decided she could give herself today not to eat, but then tomorrow she had to start eating again.
"Long night?" Theo asked when he came into the kitchen.
"You could say that," Rachel said.
"You were called out?"
"Yes. I don't want to explain right away." She felt Neville should hear first, so he could decide what he wanted to do.
Theo looked at her, one eyebrow raised. "Alright. I'm not going to push." He sat down and the House Elves began sending breakfast items over to the table.
Rachel sat and poured herself a glass of pumpkin juice. She wasn't hungry, but she could manage to drink something.
Hermione joined them next, followed by Draco. The table was mostly quiet as they read the newspaper and ate breakfast.
Rachel thought it was strange how life just went on. She had killed someone less than twelve hours ago and here they were just sitting and having breakfast. She stood and left the room, climbing the stairs to the second floor. She found Neville's door cracked open and knocked on the door frame.
Neville came to the door, his hair damp from showering and pulling his robes over his clothes. "Rachel?"
"Can we talk for a moment? There's something I need to tell you."
He looked uncertain but nodded. "Come in."
Rachel went into Neville's room and noticed that Trevor's terrarium was sitting on Neville's desk. "He likes the sun?"
"He does. I think he likes it better here than at Hogwarts. It's easier to keep him here when I don't have to worry about him hopping off through the castle," he said. "What's going on?"
"You might want to sit down," she suggested, feeling guilty again.
Neville sat, but now he looked worried.
"I killed Bellatrix Lestrange last night."
He stared at her, his eyes round with surprise. "Oh," he said faintly.
"I felt you should know before everyone knows. It will probably be in the paper tonight," she continued.
"Are you okay?"
Rachel sat down on Neville's desk chair. "Not sure yet. Still getting used to the idea."
"Is this going to be a problem with the MLE?"
"I don't think so. They're going to debrief the team. It was an accident, Neville. I wasn't trying to kill her, I was trying to stop her from escaping. I should have let her retreat, but I didn't."
Neville watched her for a moment. "I'm not going to say that this is a good thing. I don't know that having to kill someone is ever a good thing and I'm sorry it happened to you. But I'm glad Bellatrix is dead. I'm glad she can't hurt anyone else. There's always been a part of me that's been afraid of her. Deeply afraid of her. I worried that she'd come after the rest of my family. I don't even know that she didn't. No one knows who was there when my Gran and Great Uncle were murdered. But now she can't come after me."
Rachel nodded. She was glad Neville - and everyone - was safe from Bellatrix. She just wished that it hadn't happened this way.
"Would you come with me to see them? My parents, I mean. I want to tell them that they're safe now."
"Sure," Rachel said. If Neville wanted her there for that, she could do that.
"Do you want some space or do you want to go see everyone?" Neville asked.
"I think I need to tell people. I'd rather have them hear it from me than from the newspaper. But I understand if you don't want to be there for that," she said.
"No, I do," he said, his eyes fixed on her. "I'm not upset by this, Rachel. I'm relieved. I'm just sorry that you were hurt in the process."
"I'm not sure I'm hurt, exactly."
Neville nodded. "After the battle at Hogwarts, I felt overwhelmed for a while. I felt like I hadn't been myself during that battle and that I didn't know how to reconcile that with who I am. I…It was scary. And it was hard. But I also felt powerful. I fought Death Eaters and I killed them and I survived that. Before that, even during our training with Tonks and Kingsley, I didn't feel like I could do it. I felt for sure that when I encountered the Death Eaters that I was going to get scared and not be able to fight. And I was scared. But I fought anyway."
"I think you can do more things than you think you can. You've done a lot of things Neville, some of them very difficult. You had a corporeal Patronus at thirteen years old. You're an animagus. You taught lessons for the DA. You were one of the top students in our year and had six NEWTs. You're doing a Mastery. You killed the Dark Lord's snake. And you stood up to the Death Eaters and protected the escaping students. You're brave. You're stronger than you think you are." Rachel watched him intently, willing him to believe it.
"I know. And I'm still coming to terms with that and deciding what it means for my life. I think…I think if I hadn't fought in the battle at Hogwarts, I wouldn't have had the nerve to ask Hannah to date me. And I'm proud that my Mastery is going well. Mistress Selina is always telling me how impressed she is with me and is asking me to do more and more in the greenhouses. She says that she trusts me and she knows that I'll ask for help if I need it. It's- I'm still getting used to it. It feels good though," Neville said, his expression somewhere between sad and thoughtful.
"I'm glad that your Mastery is going well." She was relieved that Neville's Mistress was being kind to him and supporting him.
"Are you going to stay with the aurors?" Neville asked.
"Not sure yet," Rachel said. "I mean, not long term. I'm done when the Death Eaters attacks are over. But I'm not sure if I'm going back yet."
"Do whatever the right thing is for you. Don't let them pressure you," he said as he stood. He came over to Rachel and placed his hand on her shoulder. "There's no shame in walking away from it. That doesn't make you weak; it means you're taking care of yourself."
"Thanks," she said. She figured she needed to figure out how she felt about killing Bellatrix before she figured out how she felt about returning to the aurors.
"Ready to go downstairs?" he asked.
"Yes. Let's do this. Then I need to go speak with Sirius. Then Severus."
"That's right, Bellatrix was Sirius' cousin," Neville said.
"And Draco and Tonks' aunt," Rachel said.
Neville now looked worried. "How are they taking it?"
"They say they're alright with it, but I sort of killed their aunt right in front of them."
"Well, I think you have to trust that they're dealing with it in their own way. Maybe the way they feel about it now won't always be the way they feel about it. I know I feel differently about my Gran and Great Uncle's deaths now than I did when it first happened."
Rachel nodded. She expected everyone would need some time to come to terms with it.
"To Sirius Black. Is it alright if Draco and I come by to speak with you?" Rachel said to her Patronus.
Millie leaned in and gave Rachel a hug. "Do you want company while doing this? Support? Something?"
"I'm alright, but thank you." She wasn't sure if she was going to stop being alright at some point. She did feel guilty, but it wasn't the crushing guilt she'd felt after her aunt and uncle were killed. She wondered why that was. If anything, she'd had a more direct hand in killing Bellatrix than she'd had in killing her relatives.
Sirius' dog trotted into the room. "Come over at any time; Remus and I are here."
Rachel looked to Draco and he nodded.
"I'm going to go directly to Severus' after this. I'm not sure when I'll be home," she told Millie.
"That's fine. We're here for you, whenever. You too, Draco," Millie said.
Draco shook his head. "I don't need people to be here for me. This is not a loss. It's just another dead Death Eater."
Rachel wasn't sure that was the healthiest attitude for him to take, but she couldn't see what she could do about it other than to be there for him if he needed someone. She went to the fireplace. "Twelve Grimmauld Place," she said, throwing in the floo powder. After a semi-suffocating few moments in the fireplace she stepped out into the kitchen of Sirius' house. She moved out of the way and Draco stepped out after her.
The kitchen was quiet and empty and there were a few dishes in the drying rack and a folded newspaper on the long table. Rachel went to the doorway and looked out into the hall. "Sirius? Remus?" she called. She'd send her Patronus again before searching the whole house.
"Hold on a sec," came Remus' voice from upstairs.
Rachel wandered out into the hallway, noting how quiet the house was. It must feel strange not to have the Order constantly coming through and not to have a village of muggles and muggleborns in the attic.
Remus rounded the stairs and looked down at them. "Rachel? Draco? Is everything alright?"
Rachel hesitated, uncertain how to answer that question.
"We need to talk to Sirius. About family stuff. You can be there if he wants you there," Draco said.
Remus looked from Draco back to Rachel and seemed both confused and worried. "Did something happen to Tonks?"
"Tonks is fine," Rachel said quickly, not wanting to give Remus the wrong idea.
Remus looked relieved. "Let me get Sirius and we'll meet you in the sitting room, unless you need a warded space for privacy. There's no one else in the house right now."
"We don't need a warded space," Rachel said.
"Alright, let me get Sirius," Remus said before disappearing again.
Rachel went into the sitting room, found her usual armchair, and curled up in it.
Draco took an armchair nearby and looked around with a frown. "They need a House Elf. It's dusty in here."
"Might not be a bad idea," she said. She had a hard time picturing Sirius doing routine housework, even with a wand.
A few moments later Sirius and Remus entered the sitting room. They sat down on the sofa facing them.
"I take it this isn't an engagement announcement?" Sirius asked, raising his eyebrows at them.
"Sirius. No," Rachel said at same time as Draco was shaking his head and saying "Absolutely not."
Sirius laughed. "Well good, I'm not sure how I would feel about my goddaughter being my cousin-in-law."
"Has something happened?" Remus asked. "You said it was a family matter."
"I killed Bellatrix last night," Rachel said, wishing there was a better way to say it.
Both Sirius and Remus looked stunned for a moment.
"You killed Bellatrix?" Sirius asked, all his emphasis on the word 'you'.
"Yes. I am so sorry. It was an accident," Rachel said.
"You accidentally killed Bellatrix," Remus repeated, still looking like he was having a difficult time integrating that information into his reality.
Draco sighed. "It's not that complicated. Rachel cast a Bludgeoning hex to stop Bellatrix from escaping, and Bellatrix tried to dodge what she thought was Rachel's initial spell trajectory and wound up stepping right into the Bludgeoning hex."
Remus winced.
"Well, fitting end," Sirius said.
Rachel stared at him. "Sirius, she's dead. I killed her."
"Yes, I do realize that. And you did the world a favor. Honestly they should give you another medal," Sirius said with a nod.
"We're sorry that you experienced killing someone, that's never easy. But Bellatrix needed to be stopped. It's safer for everyone that she's dead," Remus said.
She shook her head. "Why is everyone acting like this? I killed a person."
"You were engaged in a battle?" Remus asked.
Rachel nodded.
"I tried to tell her this. We were in combat, Bellatrix had sent more than one Killing Curse at Rachel and at Tonks. Bellatrix was taunting Rachel and was on the verge of either escaping or bringing in reinforcements. She was trying to lead us into a trap. There were anti-apparition wards up. Rachel acted to stop Bellatrix from retreating and potentially bringing reinforcements. It's not her fault that Bellatrix thought she was casting something lethal and dodged instead of shielding." Draco turned to look at her. "It's not your fault."
"Draco's right," Sirius said. "Both Remus and I have seen plenty of combat. I know that Snape is going to tell you the exact same thing as I'm about to tell you, just as Shacklebolt and Tonks and Bones are all going to tell you too. This happens in combat. You can't control the way your enemy moves. You see someone point their wand and you react based on what you think they're about to do. You dodge because you expect the Killing Curse from Death Eaters. They dodge because they don't know what you're casting - with the aurors sometimes it's the Stunning spell, but sometimes it's the Killing Curse. Bellatrix was always going to assume the worst. She expected that people would want to kill her."
"I pointed my wand at her, to get her to shield instead of casting at me, and then I pulled it to the side to cast the Bludgeoning hex to collapse the arch and prevent her from getting to the door."
"Perfectly reasonable. That's a perfectly reasonable course of action to take," Remus said.
"And you can see it from the other side too, can't you? A Death Eater points their wand at you, they're about to cast, and you move to dodge. Once you're moving you can't easily change course, even if you see a spell coming at you," Sirius said, nodding.
"You killed Death Eaters, didn't you?" Rachel asked.
"Yes. I'm not even sure how many," Sirius said.
"I'm afraid I don't know the number either. I was keeping track during the first war. I felt an obligation to, even if I didn't always know who I'd killed. Somewhere along the way I just stopped counting. It wasn't helping me any longer, if it ever was," Remus said.
Draco shook his head. "I don't even know how many Death Eaters I killed at battle at Hogwarts. It was too chaotic. I'm not sure how many people I hit and how many times it was lethal."
Maybe she'd feel different about killing Bellatrix now if she'd fought at the battle at Hogwarts. "I guess I just don't see the point."
"The point of what?" Remus asked.
"The point of any of it. All these people died and what did anyone accomplish? Things aren't better in the Wizengamot. There's still a lot of anti-muggle and anti-muggleborn prejudice there. Over two thousand people died, we sent a bunch more to Azkaban for the rest of their lives, and there's just this. And even putting aside that, why are the Death Eaters even bothering to attack anymore? Why kill more people? What does it matter?"
"War is never a net gain for a society," Remus said. "We fought because otherwise we wouldn't be standing against the atrocities that You-Know-Who was committing. We fought because otherwise there wouldn't be anymore muggleborns in Britain."
Sirius nodded. "There is a saying I heard somewhere, that we fight war to reach peace. We couldn't have peace with You-Know-Who and the Death Eaters doing what they were doing. And yes, it cost a lot of lives. But I think that's preferable to living in You-Know-Who's vision of Britain. Of course, I lived through the war, both of them, so I'm unaccountably biased about that."
"I wasn't saying we shouldn't have fought. I guess I'm saying I had hoped things would be better after the war. That we would have learned something, collectively," Rachel said.
"Doesn't work like that, I'm afraid," Remus said. "People are still people. We still have a lot of work to do in Britain on our prejudices. The war never would have gone as far as it did if people didn't support You-Know-Who's ideals."
"There are plenty of those people left," Draco said. "But as long as they're not attacking people, I'd like to think we can work with them. I don't agree with everything Rachel and Hermione say about muggles, but they're not as bad as I thought either."
Sirius gestured to Draco. "See, if you can convince one person, you can convince more. And that's how it will work. One person at a time."
Rachel didn't think she could befriend every pureblood elitist in Britain and teach them about muggles. But she could do more than she was doing. Her book project, for one. Maybe she could use interviews with Witch Weekly to introduce ideas about muggles. Maybe even a monthly column or something. The Muggle Studies curriculum was still in the back of her mind, even if Professor Dumbledore thought that was not a viable option. There was more that she could do, and not just in stopping Death Eaters.
And she could start making friends in the Wizengamot. She couldn't be friends with everyone, but she could start with the people who were making laws. She could start with Anyssa, who at least seemed open to the idea.
"Are you alright, Rachel? I know it's a hard thing," Remus asked.
"I don't know yet," she said. "I'm still figuring that out."
"Take some time. Are they expecting you back with the aurors right away?" Sirius asked.
"No, I'm not allowed back yet. I have at least a week."
"Good. Take some time and let yourself figure it out," Remus said.
"There's nothing saying you have to go back at all, if you don't want to," Sirius said, raising his eyebrows at her.
"I don't know yet," Rachel said. She thought that question was going to take awhile.
"Stay for a bit, tell us what else has been going on in your lives," Remus said.
"Yes, do. I don't get to see both of you nearly enough," Sirius said.
Rachel sat back in her chair and listened while Draco discussed Wizengamot politics with them. She just needed a minute.
Severus looked up from his research when he heard footsteps. "Rachel?"
She appeared in his office doorway looking drawn and tired.
"What happened?" he asked as he stood. He went to her side, trying to read the situation in her expression.
"I killed someone," she said, blinking a few times at him, though her eyes were dry.
Severus took a moment to steady himself before gently taking Rachel by the arm and guiding her to the sofa. "With the aurors or did something else happen?" he asked, trying to determine how much of a problem they had.
"With the aurors. There was a battle last night," she said. She was now clinging to his hand as they sat.
He nodded. That much was a relief. He didn't expect the aurors to have a problem with Rachel killing a Death Eater.
"It was an accident," she said before he could formulate his next question.
"Do you want to talk about what happened?" he prompted.
Rachel took a slow breath. "I pointed my wand at her, to try to get her to shield instead of casting at me. Then I pulled my wand to the side to cast a Bludgeoning hex past her, to stop her from going in the door, but instead of shielding, she dodged right into my spell."
Severus held back a wince. A Bludgeoning hex would not be a clean death. "That can happen. You can't always predict what the enemy will do. That can be part of what makes battles difficult, you can try to anticipate, or to make certain maneuvers to get people where you want them, but you can't guarantee their behavior."
"I should have let her retreat. I made the wrong call."
"Perhaps. That's also part of combat. You're making decisions in a short time frame and under extreme circumstances. Sometimes you will make the wrong decision, just because of the circumstances. I've seen it happen many times in combat, the results often deadly," he said, hoping that this wasn't going to cause an emotional spiral for her.
"Sirius said you'd say this," she said, meeting his gaze.
"He did?" Severus hadn't thought himself quite so predictable.
"Well, not that exactly, but that this is how combat works."
"Black and I have both seen plenty of combat. I imagine we drew some of the same conclusions from it," he said reluctantly. He had settled on the idea that Black was the lesser of two evils and that he could at least work with the man when it came to protecting and raising Rachel, Draco, and Malcolm.
"Was it like this in the first war?"
"What do you mean?" He didn't have any idea how to begin to answer that question.
"When you killed people, in combat, was it because you were trying to kill them, or did it just happen?" she clarified.
"A little of both. Our goal was generally to kill enough of them that they retreated." Of course, at the time, Severus had been fighting with the Death Eaters, not the Order. "I tried to avoid killing when I could, without making it obvious that I was doing so. After the first few times in combat, I did not wish to kill anyone, for the most part. Sometimes people died anyway, whether it was a tactic that had gone wrong or I was forced into the situation to save my own life."
"Did you feel guilty about it?"
"In general, during the war, I did not feel too much guilt. I was occupied with staying alive and not incurring the wrath of the Dark Lord or being captured by the aurors. I did not have a great deal of time or energy for self reflection. After the war, I felt a great deal of guilt and grief. Primarily for my role in Lily and James' deaths," he admitted.
She nodded, looking pensive.
"Are you feeling guilty about the person you killed?"
"Yes. But I'm also really frustrated with how people are responding to it."
"How so?" he asked.
"They act like just because it was Bellatrix I killed, that it's no big deal. That she deserved to die, just because of who she is."
Severus exhaled. He hadn't realized it was Bellatrix she'd killed. "Perhaps it is relief that she can no longer harm anyone," he suggested.
"For Neville, yes, I can see that. He was still afraid of her. He said so," Rachel said, looking at him again.
"I imagine he was. I expect he learned about what the Lestranges did to his parents at a young age and that probably made a big impression on him."
"But Draco, and Tonks, and Sirius? They don't seem to care," she continued.
"Family relationships are complicated. They are probably still sorting out how they feel about it." He had been meaning to check in on Draco again, perhaps now would be a good time to do it. "I think what is more relevant to you is how you feel about it."
She sat quietly, her gaze falling back to her knees. "I don't know yet. I just want other people to hold me accountable for what I did."
"At the end of the day, the only person you are accountable to is yourself. What is the MLE's response?"
"I'm on administrative leave while they sort it out but Kingsley said that I'll be cleared."
"You do not have to return to the aurors if you don't wish to," he told her, not expecting that would make a difference in her decision, but feeling that he needed to say it.
"Everyone has said that to me today."
"That is because they care about you and want to make sure you know that you should make the best decision for you and not feel an obligation to return to the aurors," he answered steadily.
She sighed. "I don't know yet. I have at least a week to figure it out, but I want to figure out how I feel about killing someone before I figure out how I feel about the aurors."
"That is reasonable. If you want an earlier appointment with Torey, I'm sure she'd be willing to see you."
"I'm actually meeting with one of the MLE's Mind Healer's on Monday. Should be an interesting experience. I'm not quite sure what I'll say to them."
"They might have more applicable advice in this instance, since this is a scenario they will be very familiar with. I would still recommend that you tell Torey when you see her."
Rachel shook her head. "I don't think I'll have much of a choice about that. I'm expecting this will be in the Evening Prophet tonight."
Severus restrained himself from sighing at the realization. Of course they would make a big deal over Rachel killing Bellatrix Lestrange. He wouldn't be surprised if they drew out comparisons to her killing the Dark Lord or speculated on who she might kill next. "That is probably true. You do not have to read the articles. Perhaps ask one of your friends to read it and summarize the relevant points. Or I can do so."
"Maybe. I just worry that the Daily Prophet is going to have the same reaction as everyone else. They're going to act like it's a good thing I killed Bellatrix."
"You clearly don't think that it was a good thing," he said, hoping to discover where the problem was.
"No, I don't. Bellatrix should have been captured and gone to trial. We shouldn't be killing people."
"Ideally, yes, that is what should have happened. But you told me yourself, it wasn't your intent to kill Bellatrix."
"Isn't that worse?" she asked, looking worried.
"How so?"
"People don't just die from accidents. I killed her. It was an accident, but I killed her." She was now sounding more distressed.
"First, I will tell you this. People die from accidents all the time, both in the magical world and the muggle world," he began.
She raised her eyebrows at him. "Really?"
"Yes. Really. People die from mis-cast spells, accidents in inventing spells, mis-using potions, mis-brewing potions, broom accidents, curses backfiring, and all sorts of other things. Just like in the muggle world people die in car accidents, accidents with chemicals and gasses, falls and work injuries, and accidents in a fight that they didn't intend to turn deadly. Accidents happen. Perhaps you made a choice under duress that you wouldn't have made under other circumstances. That happens. People make mistakes all the time."
Rachel sat, clearly considering his words. "That's kind of scary in a different way."
"It is. We are all mortal. Accidents happen. Sometimes we're just in the wrong place at the wrong time. That is part of life." He knew it was a hard thing to accept, but it was the raw truth of the matter. People died, sometimes for no reason at all.
She nodded. "Maybe I shouldn't feel that way about death, because I've been to the afterlife. I know it's safe there. Maybe Bellatrix is getting help there that she didn't get in life."
"I would hope that she is. Bellatrix was undoubtedly mentally ill, but that does not excuse the things that she did. Even among the Death Eaters, people were disturbed by her. When the Dark Lord really wanted to make a point, he sent the Lestranges." Severus knew that Bellatrix's marriage to Rodolphus was by marriage contract, but he shuddered to think what their relationship must have been like in private.
"Do you think the Dark Lord was mentally ill too?"
Severus pondered the question. He didn't know that he'd go so far to say that all murderers were mentally ill. He felt under the right - or wrong - circumstances practically anyone could commit murder. On the other hand, he'd seen the Dark Lord's paranoia, irrationality, and mood swings. "I don't know," he finally said. "It's difficult to tell what was the original personality of the Dark Lord and what was the influence of violating his own soul. Many people say that the people that they fear are inhuman or are monsters, to try to separate themselves from them, but in the Dark Lord's case, I think the term inhuman is applicable."
"Especially after his resurrection. There was something not right about him after that. I could feel it," she said, nodding several times.
"He used a very old, very dark ritual. It's not surprising that someone being held together by dark magic felt wrong," he said, though he found himself mildly curious as to what that had felt like to her. Clearly it had been distinct enough for her to notice.
Rachel's shoulders slumped. "I think this is the hardest part."
"What is?"
"Seeing that you did something wrong, but not being able to fix it. It's frustrating that one little change is all that it would take to fix something, but there's still nothing you can do about it."
"No one is perfect, but also think of this: what might have happened if you hadn't killed Bellatrix right then?" he suggested.
"She might have brought reinforcements from inside the building. We were under an anti-apparition ward and were managing against as many Death Eaters as we could. If more had arrived, some of us might have been killed or captured."
"Perhaps that is so. There's no way to know. At some point you just have to accept that the way things happened is the way they happened, and keep going with your life. I'm not saying not to reflect or have feelings about it, but that obsessing over what you might have changed doesn't help anyone," he said.
She nodded again. "I know. I'll be alright. I just need some time. And I wanted to tell you before you saw it in the newspaper. I'm assuming Tonks told Andromeda."
"I think that's a fair assumption. Why don't you stay for a while and take a break?" He'd been planning to do other things today, but they could wait.
"We could brew," she suggested.
"We could," he agreed, recognizing that she wanted to take her mind off things. "What would you like to brew?"
"Something challenging. Something you were instructed to brew in your Mastery maybe."
"I know just the potion. Whenever you'd like."
Rachel stood. "Now, if you're ready."
"Yes, now is fine," he agreed. He was willing to distract her for as long as she needed.
"You're not going to bed tonight, are you?" Millie asked, dressed in a nightgown with an open dressing gown over it and holding Midnight in her arms.
"Not yet at least," Rachel said, looking up from her notes on the book she and Hermione were writing for magical people to learn about muggles.
Millie came further into the sitting room and sat down next to Rachel, avoiding the stacks of parchment she'd made. Midnight made no such effort and promptly laid down on the stack next to Rachel. "When was the last time you slept?" Millie asked.
"Eh, I got about four hours on Thursday," Rachel said, scratching down a note about needing to research the rudimentaries about how cars worked and figuring out a way to describe what petrol was to magical people. The way it had been described to her in primary school was that it was refined from oil that used to be dinosaur bones, but she was seriously questioning that. That didn't sound right at all. She needed a muggle library and she wasn't entirely sure how to go about finding one. "Do you have questions about cars? Like, if you were looking at a car, is there something you would want to know about it?"
"Well, after Hermione's mom drove us in one, I think I have a general understanding of what they do. I guess I don't really understand how or why," Millie said after a moment.
"Why?" Rachel asked, trying to figure out what that question might even be asking.
"Well. They can't apparate or use the floo, so I get why they need something. But why cars? Or how cars, I guess. Why is it cars and not something else?"
She sat flummoxed by the question. Why cars? "I don't know that there's an answer to that question," she finally said. "They used to have horses pull carriages, and the people would ride in the carriage. And then they invented the engine and replaced the horses with an engine. Is that what you mean?"
Millie pursed her lips and looked thoughtful. "Not really. I guess I can't understand how it works, so I can't understand why someone would think to invent it. It seems really complicated for what it does. Like a broomstick is just a broomstick. Simple. And the floo is pretty simple too and so is apparition. But cars seem really complicated when they only do one thing. It's like Hermione's computer. I just don't see how it's possible at all."
Rachel looked back down at her notes. Maybe she needed to rethink the entire technology section if these were the questions that Millie had. It was like she was having an entirely different conversation. "I mean I suppose the first step is that these things exist and they work. Are people actually going to believe that though?" It wasn't going to do her any good to publish the book if people didn't believe what she was writing.
"Hard to say. When we first started reading muggle books I was confused by a lot of the things in them. Some of the things I dismissed as part of the story turned out to be true," Millie said. "I think having pictures in your book will help. Some of the books I read just named things but didn't describe them, they just assumed we'd know what they were."
Rachel nodded as she thought of a new idea. She needed to cultivate a muggle reading list for people. She could include a suggested books section in the back of the book. Come to think of it, she could do that for her muggleborn primer as well. She quickly wrote down the idea.
"Are you trying to distract yourself?" Millie asked.
"A bit," Rachel said. "And when I talked to Sirius and Remus it reminded me how important this project is. We have to start somewhere and I can't go to every pureblood in magical Britain and explain muggles to them personally."
Millie laughed. "I'm imagining you showing up on people's doorsteps for their weekly muggle lesson."
"I would if I could," Rachel said.
"Well, I mean, you can."
Rachel looked at her. "Seriously?"
"Well, not on people's doorsteps, obviously. But you could give a lecture series at the Ministry. People would show up, just because it's you, no matter the topic," Millie suggested.
Rachel imagined herself speaking to a full auditorium of people and felt ill. "I don't know about that. I have a hard enough time speaking in front of the Wizengamot." She wiped her hands on her trousers because they were now clammy just from the mental picture of it. "I was thinking more of a column in Witch Weekly."
Millie looked thoughtful again. "You could probably only do certain topics, but I bet you could do some. Muggle fashion and clothing styles. How to buy things in muggle shops. What sort of things are popular with muggles," she suggested.
It wasn't exactly the hard hitting issues that Rachel had been intending to go for, but she also had to consider what Witch Weekly would be interested in publishing. And if the idea was to normalize muggles as people, then those things would be important. "I suppose the problem is I don't know anything about muggle fashions and what's popular. I don't know anyone who does."
"But we know a very good muggleborn researcher who has muggle parents. I'm sure Hermione would be willing to help with this." Millie nodded. "And, I think having you write the column also helps connect you to people and to humanize you. It's just like at Hogwarts; once the students there were used to you, they managed to interact with you better. You were still the Girl-Who-Lived, but they were able to treat you like a classmate. The more people recognize you as just a person, the easier this will be."
Rachel grimaced. "I don't know how much of that is possible after the article in the Evening Prophet."
"Yeah, that was bad," Millie agreed. "And ridiculous. Who is even going to believe that the MLE has given you the task to hunt down and kill the most wanted Death Eaters? That's absurd."
"Some people will believe anything." Rachel tipped her head back against the sofa.
"I'm sure Madam Bones will release a statement that it's not the truth."
"I know, but while the article about me killing Bellatrix was on the front page, the retraction will be printed several pages back." Could she fix the Daily Prophet? Could she influence the Minster to fix the Daily Prophet? She kept coming back to the problem and finding herself without an answer. The bigger part of the problem was that she wasn't sure what fixing the Daily Prophet would look like. She knew the effects of the problem, but not the cause. Trying to do something to change it might just make the situation worse.
"Well, I think your column idea is a good one. And I think a lecture series would be good too, but I can see why you wouldn't want to do that," Millie said.
"At least not while I'm still receiving threatening letters," Rachel agreed.
Millie shook her head. "They have to be absolutely crazy. You killed the Dark Lord and they're sending letters to you like you're not one of the most protected people in Britain."
"I bet the Minister gets death threats," Rachel realized out loud.
"Oh probably. Probably Madam Bones too."
Rachel sighed. "Sometimes I think the world is just impossible. There's all these people and they're just scrambling over each other to accomplish what they want, but it's impossible to do something meaningful."
"I don't think so," Millie said after a moment.
"You don't?"
"No. I think it's hard to do big things that require a lot of people, because it's hard to get people to agree on anything. But I don't think the small things that people do are meaningless. Look at Draco. If you hadn't made friends with him, and if he hadn't decided to rescue you, he would probably be dead from being a Death Eater right now. And if Theo hadn't had friends to turn to, who knows what would have happened to him when his father was like that. And Sirius took in both of them, and Neville, and Hermione, and Hermione's family, and so many other people besides that. He changed all their lives. And our friend group has changed all of our lives for the better, and I think the lives of our other friends too, because we offered support to them and to each other. I think that's meaningful, and I think that's had a huge effect. Imagine if you'd been all alone at Hogwarts."
Rachel nodded. "It would have been terrible. And Severus saved my life. Multiple times. And all of you have helped save my life too. I wouldn't have been able to go to the Dark Lord that day without the care that all of you gave me."
Millie reached over Midnight and hugged Rachel. "And I would have been utterly miserable and alone at Hogwarts without you. I know I wouldn't be doing a Mastery if the group hadn't helped me. I probably wouldn't have taken Arithmancy at all without the group's support. And we helped Neville with potions, so he could do his Herbology Mastery. And Hermione may have never gotten the idea to be a curse specialist if it wasn't for all our experiences. And no one would have been there to support Ginny after the diary and through Percy dying. And no one would have helped Luna see a Healer and figure out what she was seeing and getting her away from her dormmates. We all helped each other."
Rachel nodded into Millie's shoulder as she hugged her back. "I'm glad we're friends."
"Me too," Millie said, releasing Rachel and then patting Midnight, who had been squished between them. "So, since we're friends, what can I do to support you right now? Eventually you are going to have to sleep. And don't think I didn't see you avoiding meals either."
"I'll eat tomorrow. And I do mean that. I just gave myself the day off," Rachel said. "And I will sleep. I just worry about what this is going to do to my nightmares."
"Time for one of your modified Dreamless Sleep potions?"
"Not until Monday, I've had two this week already," Rachel said. She regretted that now.
"I'm glad you're keeping track," Millie said. "Is company good or do you need something else?"
"Company is good, if you want to be up. I don't want to keep you from sleeping."
"I'm up and I won't be able to go to sleep now anyway, not for a while at least. Why don't you tell me what you're working on?"
"Actually, you can read some of my sections and tell me if they're confusing or if you want more information from them," Rachel said, looking around at her piles of parchment for the beginning of her book. She found it under Midnight. "Do you want a lap?" she asked Midnight. "I'll scratch behind your ears if you move."
Midnight obligingly moved into Rachel's lap and held her head up to be scratched.
Rachel handed the stack of parchment to Millie and worked on scratching behind Midnight's ears. She was glad for the company.