All characters from Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer. I own nothing except my version of events.

A/N: I didn't post earlier this week and didn't even bother to warn u guys, my bad. It's been a really busy week and I haven't had the time to edit... even this one felt a bit too premature to post but I didn't want you guys to have to wait any longer for a new chapter. So here it is. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 5

"It feels like you just got here and you're leaving already." Jess pouts as she continues counting the bills in the cash register.

I roll my eyes, hunched over the counter she's working on, chin resting on the heel of my palm watching her clearing the till before closing for the day.

"This is the longest I've been here since winter break. I'll be back before you know it."

"Summer?"

"I'm still coming for a weekend every few weeks, but I'm probably taking summer classes so I'm not sure."

She clicks her tongue in displeasure. "Always school."

"Yes, always school. I'm actually trying to graduate on time." I clarify, trying to stop myself from grumbling as I answer.

There was no point in this discussion. My education always came first. If I wanted to continue with my plans to graduate next year and leave this place, I needed the credits to start planning my application process to law schools.

It was the goal, after all.

"You need a break." She insists, as if not hearing me. "Maybe taking the summer off will be good for you. Help you relax before law school, which I've heard is taxing."

"Jessica." Mike warns from across the store without turning in our direction. Too busy restocking the high shelf in preparation for tomorrow.

"What?" She hollers back. "I just think Bella needs a break from school is all. Maybe cherish her time near Forks before she inevitably leaves us."

I narrow my eyes at her, not happy with her attempts at making me feel guilty for my plans to leave this place. I loved every single one of them, Mike and Jess, my dad, the pack but I wasn't planning on changing my plans because of them… as harsh as that may sound.

"You're trying to guilt-trip me."

"Maybe." She replies honestly. "Is it working?"

I keep my eyes narrowed in her direction.

When she looks up at me her mouth twists into a mischievous smirk, looking so self-satisfied with the effectiveness of her words.

"You know, this pregnancy is already turning you into a monster. Maybe I should steer clear from you for the next seven months."

She drops her smirk in an instant, eyes narrowing on me now. "You wouldn't dare."

I don't know how long we both stand there glaring at one another before Mike interrupts.

"Stop pushing her, Sweetheart. You know she's just as stubborn as you are. Push her and she'll disappear sooner rather than later." He warns, standing beside his wife and slipping his arm around her waist as if pulling her back from the issue at hand.

She drops her stare first and I follow right after.

I'm relieved from saying anything more when my phone pings. Receiving a text from Embry notifying me they were ready for pick up.

It was Sunday again and we were leaving to start school again. They were supposed to have come to my house and leave from there but Sam had called an impromptu meeting. Embry had alluded to the fact, this last-minute pack meeting, had been apparently devised with the sole purpose to speak about Paul, strategizing their efforts for the best way to get him to accept his wolf. He apparently was getting there but it wasn't happening as quickly as they wanted it to.

I was firmly against it. Not because they made the meeting specifically to discuss Paul's issues, but because they were discussing it without Paul present. He was currently out with Leah watching over the reservation in wolf form to keep him from finding out. And that wasn't right. They knew how hard it was to be a wolf and accept their fate. I would think they would've been more understanding than they were currently being by having a meeting behind Paul's back… but apparently not. I had a mind to rip them a new one. Someone needed to be on Paul's side and if it had to be me, a non-wolf, then that's the role I would gladly take. I had no quarrels about it.

I'd gone as far as calling Sam to tell him how disappointed I was they'd resorted to such devious plans and discouraging them from following through with the meeting, at least not behind Paul's back, it was the least they could do. But he had been insistent in this course of action, convinced this was the only way to brainstorm new ideas when he felt as though he had come to his wits end, lost for the first time as to how to get Paul join the pack and stop resisting.

I told him his plans would be counterproductive. That if Paul ever found out, it would only cause him to distance himself further from the pack, pushing him completely away from us for good. I didn't know Paul at all but this seemed like a deception he wouldn't take lightly, especially while going through the toughest time of his life. They were being unfair and I did not stand for it.

Sam refused to listen, however, and followed through with his plans anyway.

I refused to be involved and instead came to spend time with Jess and Mike at their store before leaving Forks. But facing Jess and her high-handedness about my moving away after graduation, made me regret it deeply.

I should've just stayed at my dad's.

"I gotta go, the guys are ready." I inform them, grabbing my bag from the counter. "I'll see you guys in a few weeks."

"I'll walk you." Mike interjects quickly, placing a kiss on his wife's cheek before following after me.

I nod and throw Jess a cautious smile, which she tightly returns. I try not to take offense. I was aware of how erratically emotional pregnant women were and I was sure the next time I saw her she would be back to her regular cheery-self.

As soon as the glass door closes behind us, Mike is already apologizing for his wife.

"It's alright." I assure him. "I'm sure she'll have forgotten by the time I see her again."

"Probably." He nods, casually slipping his hands in his pockets. "But you won't."

I reach Jacob's truck but don't make a move to climb inside, releasing an exhausted sigh I turn back to face him, my eyes going to the darkened forest surrounding us.

It was hard to explain why I wanted to leave this place. To find the right words to use to get them to understand. But Jess and Mike had grown up here, lived here their whole lives. I think they'd forgotten I hadn't.

Though this place felt like home, it also felt temporary. I was accustomed to living in bigger cities. Places where I could drive anywhere within a 10 mile radius and find a shopping center, a Starbucks, a donut shop, international foods, or practically anything else my little heart desired. I wasn't used to this small town life where everyone knew everyone's business. Where there was only one bar, one grocery store, one diner, one coffee shop everybody was forced to go to. When I was a kid, being here for the summer was fine, it was only for a couple of months and I was fine with that. But as soon as my time was up, I was already itching to leave this place. I might love it but I didn't think living here permanently would ever make me happy.

"It's not that I hate this place or that I love you guys and my family here any less because I want to leave. It's just that… if I have the opportunity to leave and explore a new place… why wouldn't I take it?"

"I get it." Mike says, looking thoughtful as he answers. "In high school I couldn't wait to get out of here too. I'd even applied to a few colleges and got accepted to most of them."

My eyes shift to his, surprised to hear this from him. He'd never told me before, never even mentioned it.

"So what happened?"

He shrugs his shoulders, a smile forming on his face. "I grew up with my parents frequently reminding me I would take over the store for them after graduation. It hadn't felt like something I wanted to do. I'd recklessly gone behind their backs and planned a different future for myself. I was waiting until after graduation to tell them of my plans..." He admits sheepishly. "But as time got closer and closer to graduation I found myself less desperate to leave, somehow more settled. And when Jess and I got together, without realizing it, the vision of my future started to change. Before leaving for college, in my mind, was more of a way to find myself. A way for me to explore the world as you just said. Until I realized I didn't need that anymore. I'd found what I wanted, who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. My future plans shifted along the way and I felt happier with the thought of staying home. It's where I belonged."

I silently watch him, seeing the sincere honesty in his words and expression. He looked so at peace with his decision, like there was nothing more he could have asked of the world to make him happy.

Because he already was.

"That is…. So fucking sweet and romantic." I say with absolutely no hint of sarcasm in my voice. "It's amazing you found that."

He smiles and nods. "I couldn't agree more. And now with the baby on the way, I'm even more thankful for staying home and following my heart."

"I'm glad you did too."

He nods in agreement, until his expression shifts to a more thoughtful look. "But this place isn't for everyone, Bella." He suddenly adds. "Most people who have a choice or are able to leave, do so without even a glance back. I don't blame them. Small town life can be stifling for some people. So if you think you'd be miserable here… then go, Bella. It's your life and your choice. Jess is stubborn, and her guilt-tripping you into staying is selfish on her part, but she only does it because she loves you. She sees you as her only real friend and she knows how painful it will be to say goodbye when you finally do leave. I can't exactly blame her, it's gonna suck when you're gone."

A sad smile forms on my face and I hug him tightly, unable to keep the emotion inside. "I'll miss you guys. " I say softly, "But I swear, just because I leave, it doesn't mean it's the end of our friendship. I'll still visit. I'll still call and text."

He pulls away, throwing me a warm smile. "I know, and we'll always be here, welcoming you home whenever you return."

I smile one last time before I jump into my truck. I wave goodbye through the window, receiving a parting wave from him too as I drive away.

It saddened me a little. To think of the pain I would cause my loved ones with my departure. It'll be hard, I could never deny that, but it's what I've always wanted to do, what I felt like had to do. I've never been able to picture my life here, spending the rest of my days in this small town. A part of me loved it, of course, it was my home, the place everyone I loved the most was. But I had my plans and I would follow through with them. I've long since made peace with the pain that would come from leaving and as I said before, I wasn't planning on leaving forever. I would come visit regularly, keep in contact with those I loved even from a distance. And who knows, maybe when I was done with the city life I could come back and live here permanently. I wasn't opposed to the idea. I just don't think I was ready for that now.

I was so lost in thought on my drive to La Push, I barely catch the glow of a silver wolf in front of my headlights before I hit the brakes. I stop just a few feet away, heart hammering against my chest, my breath leaving me in frightened gasps.

What the hell?

The wolf stares at me through the windshield, his vibrant green eyes connecting to mine in an instant. He doesn't move a single muscle, barely even blinking.

I take a quick look around me and frown when I don't find Leah's wolf. I only grow more confused as to why the hell Paul is standing in the middle of the only road leading to La Push without her. It would be so easy for any passerby to spot him.

After a full minute of not seeing Leah, I open my door and step out, moving cautiously forward.

Wolf Paul watches me the entire way. There's a low growling that I finally hear when I'm close enough forcing me to stop short. At my pause the growling stops.

I don't move forward again.

"What are you doing? It's dangerous to be out in the open like this…. where's Leah?"

At the mention of her name he growls again.

"You know I can't hear your thoughts like the rest of the wolves, right?"

He turns his body to face me fully, coming closer until he's looming over me, and then he growls again.

This time I'm annoyed by the action. It feels like he's trying to intimidate me and I don't like it one bit.

I cross my arms over my chest and huff.

"If you think you can scare me, it's not going to work. You saved my life once so I doubt you would attempt to hurt me now for no reason. What the hell is going on?"

There's a low rumble deep within his throat, his giant head tilting down until he's literally staring me down.

I don't back down.

I have no idea of what the hell is going on but I know it isn't really about me. Something else was going on in that wolfy brain of his and since I was the only one here, he was taking his anger out on me. He hasn't once tried to touch me so I know he's being careful. Trying to scare me, sure, but not willing to hurt me to do it.

"If you wanted me to pet you, all you had to do was ask."

Finally he makes a noise other than a growl, which sounds more like a snort than anything else and he backpedals. He gets a few feet away from me and then suddenly shifts to human form.

Paul is now shamelessly naked, completely bare right in front of me and still watching me with angry eyes.

I don't shift my eyes away from him. If anything I look down, taking note of his body in great detail. I lean back on the fender of my truck as I take a look. He's well-built all around.

And when I say all around, I mean all around.

He's huge everywhere. He's hot as hell. Not as wide or as tall as Jacob, a bit slimmer, closer to a swimmer's body, toned with every muscle in his body tight and sharply defined.

My eyes finally glide up to his eyes again but they haven't changed, reminding me of earlier. They're not his wolf's color but he's holding the same expression. He tried to intimidate me in wolf form earlier and now he's trying to intimidate me with his nakedness.

It won't work.

I've seen my fair share of naked men before, have felt a lot of them pressed up against mine too. Other people's nakedness doesn't faze me in the least.

"Is this the part where I compliment you or pretend to be shy about the fact that you're naked?" I finally ask.

He doesn't answer. Doesn't move a muscle.

And I'm starting to worry, my gaze moving to the forest still searching for any signs of Leah.

"What's going on? Where's Leah?"

He finally shrugs, just a centimeter but enough for me to take as an answer.

"What do you mean you don't know?!" I question incredulously now. Then a horrible thought enters my mind and I spring upright, panic overtaking me for a moment. "Is she okay? Do we need to call the rest of the pack?"

At my palpable panic he makes a grumbling noise and finally decides to speak. "She's fine."

I release a relieved breath, "Okay, that's good. Then what–"

"Did they call you too?"

I frown in confusion, wondering who the hell he was talking about. "Who?"

"Don't lie to me." He says coldly.

I huff in annoyance this time, I didn't like being accused of anything for no reason. "Dude I seriously don't know who you're talking about."

"The pack." He clarifies slightly disgusted by the word. Then starts to move, stalking closer and closer one step at a time. "Did they call you to talk about me? To discuss how to solve the problem?" He continues to interrogate me, stopping only when he's one step away and then he leans forward, his arms trapping me in between his body and Jacob's truck. "Do you think I'm the problem?"

I frown at the question.

I didn't think he was a problem. A complication, yes, but not a problem. But I'm suddenly more concerned over the reason for his questioning.

Why would he care if I thought he was?

I wasn't a wolf. I was part of the secret, sure, but that didn't mean I had any control over… anything, really. I could speak my opinion, say what I wanted to say and so suffer no consequences whenever I disagreed with Sam. But that's about the extent of power I held, and it didn't guarantee they would actually listen to me either.

He's angry, fully aware they were having a secret meeting to talk specifically about him. I didn't blame him. He had a right to be mad. I would be too in his shoes.

So maybe he's asking me, not because I have any power, but because he wants to know if I think the same too. If I've decided to betray him just as everyone else has, to know if he's truly alone in this…

"No." I finally say, looking him dead in the eyes. "But if you growl at me again I might be tempted to kick you in the balls this time. You're close enough and fully exposed for me to do that." I warn, my eyes shifting down again.

His eyes narrow further as if measuring how honest I'm being with him. When he accepts the truth in my words he straightens his posture, seeming to appear less upset since he first intercepted me on the road.

"But you knew about–"

"The meeting. Yes." I confirm. "I didn't think it was right for them to do that but you keep rejecting your wolf and that's a problem."

"Why?" He asks sharply.

"Because it makes you the weakest link." I reply honestly, telling him my thoughts on the matter. I had nothing to lose by being honest.

"I'm not weak." He almost growls but stops himself before he starts again.

I almost smile at his silent concession, but given the situation, it would be unwise to do so. "I don't mean weak as in strength. I mean, you're a danger to your own brothers, a liability."

"Brothers." He scoffs, anger tainting the word. "Brothers don't go behind your back and–"

"They're doing what they think is best. And you're not giving them much of a choice, Paul. They're trying to figure out how to get you to accept your wolf, how to get you to grasp how vital it is for you to. They thought speaking to the elders would help. That you would understand and accept it, that you would finally see there was an upside to being a wolf. But you haven't, if anything you've fought harder. Do you know how dangerous it is for you to do that, and not just for yourself but for everyone else too?" I try to ask, I don't need him to answer. I just needed him to understand the gravity of the situation. "If you don't accept your wolf, you become a weakness to the pack, a weakness to the tribe. They need you to fight alongside them. They need you to be someone they can depend on, someone they know will have their back when facing a vampire. That's all it boils down to. If you face a vampire, two, three, a whole fucking coven, you wouldn't be able to survive if you're not united, if you're not in sync, if you don't know how to fight together. Not to mention you'll never be able to find peace within yourself if you don't accept him either."

His eyes are locked on mine, they have been since he shifted to his human form. "You don't know what it's like..."

"I don't, you're right. And I'll never know. I'm not a wolf nor will I ever be. So I can't exactly put myself in your shoes… but what I can tell you is that I've watched my family, my best friends, going through the transition and becoming different people. It changed them and it will probably change you too, but it doesn't necessarily have to be a bad thing. They're still them just… slightly different. They have a destiny to uphold now, people to protect. It is unfair for us normal humans to ask you to do that, not when you had no choice in the matter. But it is what it is. This is your life. It turned out different than you initially thought it would but that's not necessarily a bad thing. You came back to this town on your own, willingly, which means you wanted to be here in La Push too. You want to open up that bar and build a new life here. You can still do that. Being a wolf doesn't have to change that."

"I didn't ask for it." He fights back.

"Neither did they. You know that. I'm sure they've told you. I'm also sure you've even heard it in their heads. If they would have been given a choice, this is not what they would have chosen for themselves." Then a small smirk slips in, remembering my littlest brother. He was a case all on his own. "Well, except for Seth."

That gets his expression to shift, not by much but enough for me to know I'm making an impact.

A gust of wind washes over us from the cliff to our right and I shiver at the cold, now barely realizing I didn't have a coat on. I wasn't expecting to need one, not with Jacob and Embry keeping me warm.

"It's cold out here." I announce, reminding him I was still human and susceptible to frigid weather. "Jump in the truck. I'll take you to my house so you can have some space away from the guys. I think they owe it to you after all."

Turning away from him I walk around the front of my truck to get in without checking to see if he's followed. I don't hear him move but from my peripheral I see him moving to do as I instructed.

He opens the door before I do and jumps in. We sit in silence, neither one bothered by his nakedness.

Okay so maybe I was a little hot and bothered by it. I mean, he's very attractive, and maybe if he weren't a wolf I would have totally hit on him. Kind of already did that first night we met at the bar when we had no idea of who we were. If I'd been alone, not trying to meet up with my friends, I would've totally taken him home. Actually I would've taken him to my truck and fucked him here in this seat, or the truck bed, depending on how daring I felt at the moment. Just as long as it was nowhere close to where my dad could catch us. I knew places. Paul was a catch and now that I've seen his cock on full-display, it was truer than ever before.

"Why were you heading to Sam's if they didn't call you for the meeting?"

"I mean they did call me but not for what you're thinking. Jake, Embry, and I start school again tomorrow and we were planning to head back tonight after the meeting."

"You're leaving." It wasn't a question, more like a statement, but he'd said it weirdly, almost as if he'd wanted me not to.

"Yeah. It's Monday tomorrow, end of spring break. Classes start up again and we kinda have to be the–"

"He thinks about you a lot." He suddenly blurts out.

"Who?" I ask turning to look at him and finding him analyzing me from his seat.

"Jacob."

I nod. Right, this topic… I was wondering when it would show up.

"And?"

"You're dating but what about imprinting? Aren't you afraid he'll break your heart and leave you for someone else?" He asks with clear confusion and a little bit of worry, if I'm not mistaken.

I giggle a little, reaching my house quicker than expected and parking in the driveway again. I shut the engine off and we sit in the darkened cab, turning slightly in his direction.

"Jacob and I aren't in a relationship."

His brows lift for a moment, understanding slowly filling his expression. "That explains why that other guy texted you at Sam's." Then nods slightly and asks the right question. "So is it like a friend's with benefits kind of arrangement?"

I silently nod.

"Do you have that with the other wolves?... They think about you a lot too."

At that I tilt my head curiously, "sexually?"

His mouth tightens for a moment but loosens soon after. "Sometimes."

My mouth makes a shape of an 'O.' I actually wasn't aware of that but it did make sense.

Eventually I shake my head in the negative, "Just Jacob."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

He watches me in interest but eventually shakes his head, as if not thinking it a good idea to pry any further into my sex life.

It probably wasn't.

His gaze shifts away from me and to the house.

"Is this your dad's place?"

I nod even though he can't see me, when I stupidly realize that I verbally respond. "Yup. Now come on."

I open my door and hear him do the same.

I slide the key into the front door and swing it open, turning lights as I go.

"Dad's working right now so we have the house to ourselves. I have some of Jake's clothes in my room. You good with those?"

When I turn to look at him his eyes that were once analyzing his surroundings turn to look at me again. He doesn't look particularly happy about it but he nods anyway.

"Come on." I tell him tilting my head to the stairs. "My room's upstairs."

He follows after me silently.

I keep flipping lights as I go until almost all the lights in the house are on. I move to the dresser where my old computer monitor stands and open the bottom drawer grabbing a pair of sweats and a t-shirt.

"Here." I say handing him the clothes. "Restroom is right across the hall. Feel free to shower or do whatever else you need to do. I'll be downstairs when you're done."

He barely whispers a 'thanks' before he disappears from sight.

I wait until the shower turns on before I flop down onto my bed, releasing the heaviest of breaths I ever have before.

Being here alone with Paul is weird.

We, surprisingly, talked a lot, far more than we've ever had before. Going as far as prying the giant elephant from the room and out into the open all while he was naked and looking utterly delicious while he was at it.

I get a text and I pull my phone out of my pocket.

Embry: Are you coming?

Me: Change of plans.

Me: Ran into Paul. Don't worry we're both fine but he found out about your little meeting and was not happy. I brought him back to Charlie's to calm down.

Embry: Shit.

Embry: What he say?

Me: I'm not at liberty to say. Just give him time. This is some hard shit to deal with but I think he's trying.

Me: Have you heard from Leah?

Embry: No, must still be patrolling. That bitch didn't even try to warn us about Paul.

Me: Well if I know Leah, and I think I do… She didn't approve of this meeting either. Especially when you used her as a distraction. So of course she wasn't going to warn your dumbasses.

Me: Shift to make sure she's okay?

Embry responds with a rolling eyes emoji and I copy the action physically.

While I wait I order some food on my phone and by the time I'm done Embry replies with two thumbs up.

Stupid wolves.

I put my phone back in my pocket and head back down to the living room, sitting on the couch while I wait for Paul to finish.

I lean my head back against the couch and close my eyes. I probably won't be leaving tonight. Probably not until morning, which is fine, I didn't have any classes until mid-afternoon. I just couldn't bear the thought of leaving Paul alone right now.

I might not know him, but from what I gathered out of his expression and demeanor, he was clearly hurt by the pack's actions. Feeling betrayed, alone, and vulnerable. At the moment, that's the last thing he should be feeling. He deserved all the patience and understanding we could possibly give him.

I couldn't imagine going through what he was. Having a set life and a path you've already chosen to live, only for it to be yanked away from you like it had. Your life, as you know it, no longer your own. I said his life wouldn't have to change but to be honest, I wasn't quite sure if that was true. I was just trying to pull him down from that ledge. I didn't want him confronting the pack with all that anger coursing through his veins. It would have led to a complete disaster.

The bathroom door creaks open and I turn back, hanging my arm over the back of the couch watching him descend the stairs.

"Better?"

He rakes his hand over his wet hair and nods. "Yeah, thanks." He stops at the bottom of the steps and throws a thoughtful look at my front door. "I should probably go."

"You don't have to." I say quickly before he takes a step, looking about ready to bolt.

"Don't you have to go back home?"

"I do, but I don't have classes until the afternoon so I can leave tomorrow morning."

He frowns and looks at the door again but his eyes shift to mine again as if not knowing what to do.

"I also took the liberty of ordering a shit ton of food and if you leave now I'll have to figure out a way to eat it all by myself. Next time you see me I might not look the same." I joke, playfully patting my flat stomach.

A glimmer of a smile finally appears and he walks around the couch to take a seat on the same couch as I. He leaves the middle seat empty but his body slightly turned towards mine, giving me his full attention.

"Do you want to keep talking about the wolf thing or would you prefer to talk about the weather?"

At my question he makes a scoffing sound that's more air than anything else, eerily reminding me of the noise the guys frequently make in wolf form.

Given the tense situation I don't dare point that out. Who knows what might trigger him next.

"I fought against a vampire already when I first…" He trails off, his eyes shifting away from mine to look absentmindedly at the coffee table in front of us. "I already know how to work with the wolf. It wasn't that difficult. The hard part is… having him there all the time. He's always in my head... He doesn't think like I do but he does have his own thoughts and emotions and sometimes they bleed into mine. I don't know how to distinguish one from the other. I don't always know who's feeling what at any given moment and that… confuses me."

I frown as I watch him struggling to search for words to describe it.

I've never gone this deep with any of the wolves before.

For the most part the guys kept their wolves to themselves. I saw glimpses of them in their human form but the guys were pretty good at acting as if it's just them inside their minds… if that makes any sense. I wasn't aware that it actually felt as though there was another entity inside of them. Someone foreign who they didn't know how to merge into themselves while simultaneously not giving them free reign over their minds, to not allow the wolf to take over them completely.

If I thought of it that way it sounded so very terrifying. I now understood why the guys always talked about the beginning of their transformations as if they didn't know how to stay the person they were from the past. How to stop the wolf from changing them from the person they've been since birth.

"Have you asked the guys how they cope with that?"

He shakes his head in the negative. "It's too… personal. I have the wolf in my head and I also have all the guys in my head too. I'm not used to being so–"

"Exposed?" I finish for him.

His eyes shift to mine and he cautiously nods.

"At least I can somewhat understand that part. I can't even imagine not being able to hide my thoughts from everyone else. To have them hear the private thoughts that flow through my mind. I get why you don't want to, but unfortunately you can't exactly get around it. At least you won't be able to learn how to if you don't communicate that to them." I tell him straight out.

I've heard how they all hate having to listen to each other in their minds. Picturing things someone else is because they can hear their thoughts that it's almost like seeing through their eyes. It's overwhelming, taking away any sense of privacy. But through the years I know they've learned ways to block each other from the important things. The very personal things they don't want the others to know.

"You have to tell them what bothers you. You're going to have to trust that they've been through the same thing you're currently going through, and therefore, can give you the answers you need."

He crosses his arms over his chest and glares at the table still. His body stiff and unmoving.

He's brooding.

"In a perfect world you wouldn't have to go through this, Paul. If vampires didn't exist, then your life would have remained as it was. But unfortunately that's not the way life has turned out. I don't want to call it a gift because I know how much you guys hate that word, but it is a power. And now you have the power to defeat beings that regular humans, like myself, don't stand a chance against. Hell, if it weren't for you, I probably wouldn't be sitting here with you now. And because of that. You can take control of how you will handle this situation. It's really all up to you. Do you want to keep struggling? To fight against your new reality? Or, do you want to accept your new power and take control over how you will continue to lead your life?"

His eyes shift to mine and they hold me still. Emotions intertwining behind those deep dark eyes of his. There's a flash of a different color, spotting the lightning green color of his wolf's eyes before they disappear again in the swirl of Paul's human dark eyes. It's like I can see the fight within himself, as if human Paul and Wolf Paul are standing before me and battling it out for dominance.

I startle in my seat when there's a loud, persistent knock against the front door.

Paul's eyes blink and he looks just as startled as I, as if he'd been pushed out of his own mind and hadn't even been aware he'd been trapped there to begin with.

The following knock, lasting much longer than the last, has me out of my seat and hurrying to the door.

"Geeze lady," Starts the gangly teen delivery driver. "I was about to leave with the food if you hadn't opened the door just now."

"Sorry." I say, then hand him a cash tip to pacify him when I retrieve the bags of food.

He looks much happier after the tip and I close the door behind me with my foot, placing the bags on the coffee table. I take out my food and then slide the rest to Paul's side.

"You can have the rest. I'll get us some drinks."

He's quiet as I head to the kitchen, grabbing a few cans of beer and placing them on the table when I come back. It seemed like the perfect time for a drink.

We don't engage in conversation as we eat and I turn on the T.V. to fill the empty silence. And almost as soon as I'm done with my meal I get a text from Jacob.

Did Paul leave?

Me: No, he's still here. I'm feeding him.

Jacob: Huh. Well let me know when he does. We'll head back then.

Me: We'll leave tomorrow.

Jacob: You can sleep while I drive.

Me: No. Paul needs someone. I can't leave him alone.

Jacob: He'll be fine.

I frown at his insistence to leave. It's not really Jacob. He, more than anyone, knows the pack comes first and Paul was now one of us.

Me: Tomorrow.

I send the final text back with finality, shutting off the screen and tucking the device under my leg on the couch.

"Pack?"

I turn my head in Paul's direction, noticing he'd been watching while I texted.

"Jake. He thought we were still leaving tonight."

"You don't need to stay for me." Paul informs me firmly, looking almost offended by the insinuation.

I ignore the temper taking it as a norm. It comes so easily when you're around a whole bunch of wolves all the time. "It's late and I'm too tired. I just want to sleep in a bed tonight and not wake up until its morning. We all have classes until the afternoon anyway. And you're welcome to stay here, by the way. The couch pulls out into a bed and the guys have never once complained about it so I'm pretty sure it's comfortable."

He glances down to the couch he's sitting on, then at me, then at the door with indecision.

I get up and throw the trash, not allowing him a response while I move to the living room closet to retrieve the covers. I place the pile on my dad's recliner and say. "See you in the morning. And if you need anything, just holler."

Again I don't give him the chance to deny my offer as I climb up the stairs and slip into my room.

He didn't look like he wanted to be alone even with how hard he was trying to hide it. But I've always been there for the pack and so I'd be there for Paul too. He needed to know he wasn't alone, that he could rely on us to guide him through the hardest time of his life. He just needed to trust us, to at least be open to one day trust us.

Maybe one day he would.