This chapter is based on the events from the episode Death Toll.

Dr. Howard Stiles cocked his head slightly. Earlier he had called her his toughest nut to crack , and while it was meant as a joke, it was true. Case in point, her actions on the day of the bombing.

"I mean, on a day when so many innocent people were murdered, the Jordan Cavanaugh I know would've channeled

all her energy into finding the person responsible." He said seriously.

"But it wasn't my job to find the bomber." Jordan responded from across the desk.

"Well, it wasn't your job to look for Charlie Cohen either, and yet you...you made it your personal mission to do that. Now, why?" He probed further.

"Well, he was... he was hurt. He needed my help." Jordan answered.

"You think that was the only reason?" He questioned.

She stopped, she considered just saying yes, but she knew there was more to it. She realized she was hesitating out of habit rather than a true desire not to share.

"Maybe I've changed." She offered.

"How so?" He asked, leaning forward.

"I've…I've grown up a lot in the last year. Fear has always been the catalyst for me to run and for the first time I didn't run. You told me last year to let myself out of that locked room…to free myself… I finally did." She said with a smile.

"Jordan… that is quite an accomplishment." Howard said, returning the smile

"Thank you."

"Is that the whole story? Is there something you aren't telling me?" He asked.

Jordan gave him a look and thought back to the day of the bombing.

Woody showed up at the morgue still a bit dazed with debris from the last explosion in his hair. They sat together on the couch like they so often did after a rough day.

"I really thought… for a minute, I thought I could save him. He was the bad guy… but there had been enough death. He was trying to disarm it. When he realized he couldn't he told us to run. I should have just run, but I hesitated. I don't know why." Woody rambled.

"Because you wanted to help him." Jordan said seriously, grabbing his hand

"But I couldn't. It wasn't enough. Right before, when I was talking to him trying to convince him to come with us, it… it felt like that day. I thought I was getting through to him and then… chaos." He looked away, and Jordan knew he was thinking of the day he was shot.

"You did everything you could, Woody." She assured him.

"How do you know?" He questioned.

"Because I know you." She squeezed his hand and silence followed.

"Sometimes… it's just too much." Woody whispered after a while.

"There was a little boy on the train today. He went missing after the explosion. His mother came to the morgue looking for him. He was all she had. We found him. He's okay and home with his mother tonight." Jordan offered.

"That's good, Jo, really good." He squeezed her hand. More silence followed.

"Let's get married." Jordan's words cut through the quiet.

"What?" He asked, genuinely confused.

His ears were still faintly ringing, he thought maybe he misheard her.

"I'm serious. Right now, no more waiting." Jordan got off the couch and held out her hand.

He looked her in the eyes and realized she was serious. He did not dare say a word, he just smiled, nodded and took her hand.

Jordan finished relaying the event as she held up her left hand to reveal a wedding ring.

"So I should be addressing you as Dr. Hoyt then?" He asked. Jordan's only response was a wry smile.

"A happy ending in the middle of all that tragedy. Must've felt good."

"Yeah, it did. I've wasted a lot of time in my life obsessing over things I can't change or being afraid of being happy. This case, I don't know, I decided I didn't want to waste anymore time. "

"You know, there's still one thing I don't understand. Why you found it so necessary to find that boy?" He asked.

"He and his mom had already been through so much. And all they had was each other. That's a very special bond. To love someone so unconditionally. And to know that they love you back. I was convinced I' d never have that kind of love… that I didn't deserve it. Now, I realize how important it is. Finding Charlie meant proving that love can endure." The two exchanged a knowing look, both understanding the significance of Jordan's change in perspective.