Gunshots rang through the shark demon's head. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't have stood a chance of escaping Crimson's family. But a recent massacre by one of his exes had severely thinned the number of bullets to dodge. Once he was out of sight around a brick wall, he held a hand over his mouth. He tried to steady his breath. He heard his old boss order the few lackies he had left to fetch the jawbone.

Once their footsteps faded out of earshot, he scrambled over to one of the suited shark corpses. He dragged it over to the closest car he could. He whimpered under his breath as his fingers went through the motions of hotwiring. A shout from one of the goons made his cold blood freeze.

The white two-seater sped down the road. Three loaded vehicles gave chase with pistols and Tommy guns packing heat. He swerved around multiple corners while driving from his passenger seat. The back windshield shattered just as he veered his stolen car toward a waste disposal factory.

He tied down the gas pedal with a shoelace and he jammed the steering wheel with a crowbar. After that, he dove into some bushes on his right. He tumbled down into a dirty riverbed before the other cars kept chasing the abandoned wheels. Seconds later, an explosion echoed in the distance.

…

(Months later…)

Chazwick Thurman was a mess. He had no clothes except a few garbage rags. The other homeless demons shot looks at him. His fake death had stopped the debt collectors from searching for him, but there was no way he was sweet-talking his way into another loan.

He was digging through the dumpster behind a coffee shop for anything to salvage. The entrance bell startled him. He rushed to hug a wall and whistled in denial. Peeking around the corner, he wasn't sure what he was seeing. He rubbed his eyes and looked again.

It was Stella Goetia and an imp that had a passing resemblance to Blitzo. But the imp's figure said chick. That couldn't be right, could it? He was sure this princess was the one that had an issue with her husband sleeping with imps. Yet here she was having small talk with one.

"Are you sure you don't want a ride home, Barb?" asked Stella.

"Nah, I'll be fine." Barbed Wire waved dismissively. "Besides, I've got more than one way to lose a stalker." She pointed at her filed claws. "On the other hand, you don't have a good track record of staying out of trouble."

Stella sighed. "I've only been kidnapped twice. It's not a daily thing."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, you **-ing damsel." Barb chuckled.

"Yes, quite." Stella stepped into the back of her car. "It's been nice chatting with you. Same time, next month?"

"Sure, I don't mind." Barb shrugged.

"Great, see you then!" Stella waved before shutting the door. Walter drove her away.

Barbed Wire threw her empty cup in the general direction of the dumpster. She performed a double take when a greenish-blue hand caught the cup. The shark demon chugged the miniscule droplets of caffeine left before throwing it away. He attempted to style his hair with one hand, but that failed to get rid of the two flies buzzing around his head. He gave a desperate smile while wiggling his eyebrow.

"Ew, hard pass." Barb summoned a diamond-shaped portal, jumped through, and immediately closed it behind her tail.

Chaz exhaled before he ran after his real target of interest. He ducked around corners and alleyways to avoid being spotted. Some passersby looked at him in confusion before returning to their own problems.

…

Stella paused after leaving the washroom. Some of the items along the walls were facing different directions than what she remembered. Wordlessly, she sent her familiar to scout one side of the palace while she slowly walked the opposite way.

Shadow Gunter saw the bushes at ground level shake. He somersaulted down, turned on his heel, and fired a crossbow bolt. The impact was met with somebody else wailing and tripping over the leaves into view.

The familiar imitated his brother. "You've got thirty seconds to drop the goods and leave, trespasser."

The shark rubbed a gill and squinted. "Striker? Norman Reedus's Striker? What the f**k is that getup?"

Shadow Gunter lowered his crossbow and slipped into his owner's default voice. "How do you know that name?"

The shark lifted his hands and dropped a bag of valuables. "Can I first get an extension to that thirty-second warning?"

"That depends on what you say." The familiar held his ground. "Who are you?"

"Chazwick Thurman, uh… sir?" Chaz responded. "Is there a reason you sound like a Georgina now?"

"First of all, my name is Stella," corrected Shadow Gunter, "I'm speaking through this familiar right now. Secondly, where did you hear those human names?"

"An internet series called Helluva Boss." Chaz smiled sheepishly.

"No f**ing way." Shadow Gunter facepalmed. "Of all the possibilities of reincarnation, it turns out to be a hobo?"

"I'm not a hobo! I just don't have a roof!" Chaz blinked twice. "Wait, were you also a human from Earth in the past?"

Stella's voice sighed. "It was a long time ago."

"So, uh… you remember this face from your screen?" Chaz pointed at himself.

"Uh, no. Should I?"

"Yeah, Chaz. The only shark demon to sleep with both Moxxie and Millie."

Shadow Gunter looked disgusted. "Pretty sure I would have remembered seeing something like that."

"Well, what was the last episode of Helluva Boss you saw?"

"Um, the number escapes me." The familiar tapped his chin. "The one where Stolas outright declares his divorce."

"Oh, so you were reincarnated before Part 2 of the Season 1 finale was officially released."

"Wait, they actually got that episode out of trademark hell?"

"Yeah, it showed Loona at that party that Vortex invited her to. Kesha was the guest star as the voice of Beelzebub herself."

"Shut up! They got a hold of 'Die Young' Kesha? And she's the ruler of Gluttony?" Stella fanned herself, back in the room where she was seated. "You'd better not be lying to get a rise out of me."

"Trust me. I wish I could make up something that awesome, but that's beyond my imagination."

"Holy s**t. Good for Vivzie." Shadow Gunter repositioned the crossbow. "Uh, no. That was not a pass to keep stealing."

Chaz chuckled while putting his hands back up. "Can't blame a hot guy for trying."

"Eh, you're a one out of twenty."

"You sassy b***h." He glanced to the side. "So, uh… how did you avoid getting kicked out of Stolas's crib?"

"I treated him like a person since the day we met."

Chaz blinked twice. "Isn't that out of character?"

The familiar deadpanned. "You try having a lifetime of memories shoved into your mind at age eight and see if that doesn't f**k you up."

"Oh… dam. Mine didn't kick in until I quit the mafia."

"You left the mafia?" Shadow Gunter looked surprised. "How are you still breathing?"

Chaz pointed both of his index fingers in front of himself. "My skills! … and a little luck, but mostly skills!"

"And you chose to come here." The familiar pointed down. "To the Goetia house. A place that is neither subtle nor hidden away."

"Ah, I set up a really convincing cadaver." Chaz waved dismissively. "If they haven't found me after months, they're not looking for me anymore."

"So, you're saying they have bigger fish to fry," Stella concluded.

"Hah, good one." Chaz smiled. "If you're still with Stolas, are any more eggs rolling out?"

"Octavia is our only daughter," said the familiar. "Stolas and I are content to keep it that way."

"Really?" Chaz tilted his head. "But if you're on good terms…"

Stella shook her head. "He's still a man-lover at his core. Any love for his family is platonic at most. I won't force him to bed me any more than what was necessary."

Chaz swatted and missed a fly. "Then, why have a kid with him at all?"

"You watched the show, right?" The familiar pointed the crossbow at him. "Paimon was very insistent that Stolas and his wife produce an heir. Besides, I wasn't going to rob Hell of Via."

Chaz nodded. "We could always use more hot goths. Is she single?"

Stella cleared her throat. "And with that, your extension is up. Start running, Thurman."

"Hey, wait!" Chaz lifted his hands up again. "I thought you were nicer than the real Stella!"

"Oh, I may be more open to civil conversation," admitted the familiar. "But I'm not budging for scumbags that see my daughter as a catch."

The crossbow fired. Chaz slipped narrowly around to avoid the arrow. His tail caught his bag of loot as he scampered away. Shadow Gunter loaded and fired two more times. One arrow landed in the bushes while the second one pierced Chaz's dorsal fin. He yelped as he escaped from sight.

"Seriously, why did it have to be a hobo?" Stella sighed as she recalled her familiar to her side.