-Chapter 34-

Face the Music

Mushroom Kingdom

At Peach's Castle, the council looked over the holo-map, everyone perking up in horror at the sight of Bowser's Doom Ship heading their way.

"Princess!" Toadsworth cried. "Someone's coming!"

"It's the Koopalings," Toadette deduced. "They must be coming for revenge for Mario defeating them!"

"Mario and Luigi are miles away right now!" Toadsworth remarked. "What can we do?!"

Peach's expression steeled. "All of you, evacuate. Get out of Toad Town and head into the woods as fast as you can."

Toadsworth turned to her. "Princess, what about you?"

"I'm going to defend my kingdom."

"What?!"

"As Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom, it's my duty to protect my people. Whoever the Koopa Troop is sending, I'll hold them off long enough for you all to escape."

"But Princess-!"

Peach held up a hand. "I failed to protect the kingdom against Bowser, but I will succeed with his children."

"Princess, please!" Migh T. pleaded. "Let us fight with you! The Brigade's purpose is to support you and protect the kingdom!"

"Then protect my people. Keep them safe. Please.

"But what about-"

Peach slammed her hand on the table. "Look, this isn't a discussion! Evacuate! That's an order!"

"...Yes, Princess," Migh T. gave in.

As the Toads evacuated en masse, Peach snatched up a halberd from a suit of armor, standing at the ready as the Doom Ship approached.

-X-

As the Doom Ship loomed overhead, Luigi and Yoshi came charging into Toad Town. They didn't get far before several Koopatrols dropped down, cutting them off.

"You won't stop me!" Luigi shouted. "Move it!"

"Can't let you do that, Green 'Stache."

Luigi scowled, hopping off Yoshi's back and assuming a fighting stance. "Only warning. Get out of my way, now!"

"Or what?"

The Koopatrols chuckled as Luigi's scowl deepened.

"Alright, that's enough. Men! Get these rabble-rousers and end their..." Luigi charged forward, punching him to the ground. "Gamesssssssss...?"

"Oh buddy, you're about to remember that I'm Mario's twin. Everything he can do…" A vicious glint flickered in Luigi's eye. "I can do too!"

"G-Get him!"

The Koopatrols rushed Luigi. One of them attempted to punch him, but Luigi didn't flinch, charging straight in without a hint of trepidation.

Tube City

Mario and Toad were launched out of a Warp Pipe far more violently than either of them anticipated. Both of them yelled and screamed as they were thrown about before landing in a pile of junk.

"Owww..." Mario groaned.

"Uuuugh…what is wrong with those pipes?" Toad let out.

Mario got up and dusted himself off.

"Alright, we're in Tube City, the Heart of the Pipe Maze. Toad, you know a lot about this place. What can you tell me about it?"

Toad shrugged. "Not much. Tube City doesn't really keep in contact with the surface. Heck, according to the guys in the castle, whenever the Kingdoms hold big meetings, the king - whoever that is - always communicates via fax machine."

"You guys still have fax machines?" Mario shook his head. "Never mind, let's just find the last Koopaling...and..."

"Mario?" Toad raised an eyebrow. "What's...up...?"

Mario and Toad were greeted by the sight of Tube City in ruins. Everything had been destroyed, pipes knocked over or simply missing, and the streets were just deserted.

"By the Seven..." Toad gasped. "It's… It's all gone."

Sure enough, the entire city appeared to be a ghost town, neither sound nor sight of any of the inhabitants. A tumbleweed rolled out a nearby pipe as if to emphasize the point

"Mama Mia…" Mario managed. "What did Ludwig do?"

Just then, they heard a loud metallic clunk.

"Look!" Toad called out, pointing toward an ajar warp pipe just as something dived down it.

"A person! Hey!" Mario ran over to the pipe, trying to wave the figure down. "Wait! Don't run!"

He leaned over the pipe, hoping to somehow stop the person and figure out what was going on.

"It's okay!" he called out. "We're here to help! Can you-?"

"SKREEEECH!"

"Waaaah!"

Mario fell over as a large, plant-like monstrosity burst out of the pipe. The creature looked like a gigantic Venus flytrap with a red, bulbous, round head covered in white spots and a white-lipped mouth full of sharp teeth. Mario lept back as the monster plant lunged forward, barely managing to avoid being bitten in half as it brought its massive jaws down on where he'd been standing.

'Whoa!"

Mario watched as the monster plant kept snapping its jaws, trying to get him.

"Watch out!" Toad cried. "That's a Piranha Plant! One of the most dangerous hazards of the Pipe Maze! Their roots are everywhere and they will eat anyone and anything that comes within range!"

"Seriously!?"

Toad nodded. "Game Ending serious."

The duo heard a cracking noise behind them. Suddenly, another Piranha Plant burst from the ground.

"ACK! Another one!"

The plant grabbed Toad by his backpack, lifting him into the air and tossing him upward like a seabird with a fish before opening its mouth wide. Mario quickly rushed forward, leaping and grabbing a screaming Toad mere seconds before he landed in the creature's maw.

"Right," Mario said as he set Toad down. "As much as I would love to weed whack you creeps, I'm on a time crunch. So if you'll excuse me, I have a Koopaling to crush.

The Piranha Plants just snarled at Mario, who hissed right back.

"Hey Mario..." Toad perked. "Do you hear something?"

"Hm?" Mario listened. "It sounds like...music."

"Not just any music," Toad said. "A pipe organ."

They both perked. "PIPE ORGAN?!"

"Very good, meine Freunde (1)!" Ludwig's voice came as the ground began to shake, several pipes bursting from the ground. Mario and Toad watched as a massive pipe organ made of Warp Pipes emerged. The instrument towers above them, with a tall chair in front of the keys." The chair slowly turned around, revealing Ludwig.

"Welcome, Herr Mario, to the Great Koopa Symphonic Hall!" he declared. "Please excuse the mess. We're still working on it. I'm in the middle of some–"

Mario charged forward, punching Ludwig out of the chair. He scowled, getting up.

"Hey! I'm monologuing here!"

"Oh, sorry," Mario shot back. "I didn't care!"

"Don't tell me you're one of those jerks who just spams A to skip dialogue!" Ludwig dusted himself off, then sat back down. "We villains work hard to prepare our evil speeches!"

Mario pointed at Ludwig in sheer rage. "You brought my sister to this world. You turned her into the Blue Hood. And you and your siblings have caused more than enough pain and misery. I'm in no mood for your shiitake, Ludwig! I am done playing nice!"

"Hey! I didn't bring her here. Kammy did on Dad's orders, and she became Blue Hood because someone clearly didn't give two shiitakes about her. Isn't that right, Mr. Birthright?"

Mario cringed before his face became eerily calm. "Keep shooting your mouth off, kid. Give me more and more reasons to kick your shell. I dare you."

"How about this one?" Ludwig smirked. "Mary Pat Koopa. Got a nice ring to it, don't you think? She'd make a wonderful Koopaling, with a family that actually cares about her. She might not take the name change… But you get the idea. Finally, she'll be out of the shadows of the Stupid Mario Brothers-"

The next thing Ludwig knew, he was flat on his face, his cheek hurting like hell. Before he could even register what was happening, he felt Mario grab his tail, bodily lifting him and spinning him around as if preparing an Olympic hammer throw.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, WHOA!"

Mario threw Ludwig, sending him flying. He screamed before suddenly grinning.

"Nice try!"

Ludwig pulled out a wand and shot a blast of glowing shapes at Mario, who dodged.

"Missed!"

Ludwig smirked. "Did I?"

Confused, Mario turned around to see the shapes playing the organ keys. Turning back to the Koopaling, he saw him casually waving his wand like a conductor's baton, seemingly floating in midair.

"The stage is set. The band has warmed up..." Ludwig swung his wand. "It's time for the show!"

Ludwig's wand glowed as the pipe organ lit up. Suddenly, several massive Piranha Plants burst from the pipes, screeching in fury and hunger.

"Your overgrown weeds won't stop me, Ludwig," Mario said coldly. "When you look back at this, in the three seconds it takes to pass out after I knock your head off... I think you'll find your mistake was pissing me off."

"Promises, Mario. Promises. Now...!" Ludwig waved his wand. "Devour him, my pretties!"

One of the plants lunged at Mario, who pulled his hat down, got into a sprinter's stance, and charged forward.

Mushroom Kingdom

The Doom Ship lowered its docking platform right at the feet of Peach. She remained unfazed as several Koopatrols stormed down the platform, surrounding her. Then, she heard the sound of slow, steady footsteps approaching. Tightening her grip on her halberd, Peach watched as the Blue Hood descended, coming to stand before her with an air of malice and contempt.

"So, you're the famous Princess Peach I've heard about." The hooded soldier seemed to give the Princess a once-over, their pixelated voice dripping with condescension. "I'm not impressed."

"I'm not here to impress you." Peach spun her weapon in her hand before getting into a fighting stance. "I'm only asking you once. Leave this place. Now."

Blue Hood laughed, tilting their head back as they did so.

"Oh, you're cute." They then got into a boxing stance. "But the only way I'm walking out of here is with you in shackles as my prisoner. Or with your broken body on a stretcher. I'm not picky."

"I'm not going out without a fight. Not this time."

Under their mask, the Blue Hood smirked. "Good. "

A hydraulic hiss sound filled the air before the soldier propelled themselves into the air, coming down foot first. Peach narrowly leapt back before the Hood's downward kick shattered the brick floor where she had been standing mere seconds before.

"Because if you didn't, this wouldn't be as much FUN!"

The Hood kicked the ground again, causing a piece of it to launch up for them to kick at Peach. The princess dove to the side... only to be intercepted by the Hood, who punched her through the doors. Peach skidded a bit before getting back to her feet.

"Last chance," the princess let out, wiping her mouth and pretending the red stain on her glove was lipstick. "Lay down your arms and leave in peace. I don't want to hurt you, but that doesn't mean I won't."

"I can assure you, Princess, I wanna hurt you. You have no idea what you took from me!" The Hood cracked their knuckles. "My orders were to bring you in alive, but they never said anything about the condition!"

-X-

As they faced off with the Koopatrols, Yoshi shot his tongue out at one of them. As soon as it touched their armor, Yoshi's eyes widened in pain and shock before he retracted it, fanning it as if it had just caught fire.

"That same trick won't work twice!" the Koopatrol gloated.

"Yoshi, what's wrong!?" Luigi questioned.

"Hot!" Yoshi cried. "Armor turtles' armor hot!"

"That's right! We heard about what happened to Prince Morton's troops back in the desert! How you gobbled them up and egged them! So, we coated our armor in chili oil! After all, it's a common fact that most Yoshisaurs can't stand chili peppers! (2)"

Upon further examination, the Koopatrols' armor glistened in the light with an oily sheen.

"Spicy!" Yoshi gasped. "Yoshi's one weakness!"

"Cheap trick," Luigi spat in discontent.

"Works, don't it?"

"Maybe against him, but not me!"

"Yeah, but you still gotta beat all of us, Green 'Stache, and Mario ain't here to help you this time!"

Luigi grimaced as the Koopatrols laughed. They weren't wrong. With Yoshi's ability to eat things up and turn them into exploding eggs rendered useless, they were outmatched, and even if they did win, there were so many, they'd be too worn out to save the princess. They needed something to give them an edge. His eyes flickered around, spotting a few Power-Up flowers in a nearby windowsill. He grinned.

"Ooh, that'll do." He turned to his companion. "Yoshi, I need a distraction."

Yoshi nodded, giving him a thumbs up before charging at the Koopatrols head first. "LEEEEEROYYYY JENKINNNNSSS!"

"Idiot!" one declared. "That's not gonna work on us!"

Yoshi suddenly went into a somersault before surrounding himself in a giant Yoshi Egg.

"HUH!?" the Koopatrols let out.

"EEHHHHH!?" Luigi rubbed his eyes in confusion.

The giant egg bowls right through a big chunk of the goons, sending them flying. Yoshi spirals around a bit, then breaks free from the egg. He stumbles around dizzily.

"Green man!" he called out groggily. "Do the...thing!"

"Ah, right!"

Luigi dashed past the Koopatrols and made straight for the windowsill.

"Stop him!" the leader cried. "Don't let him grab that flower!"

But it was too late. Luigi grabbed the nearest flower, one with a yellow coloration, and was surrounded by lightning. They watched as his overalls turned green, his shirt and cap turning yellow. He turned to face them, a sphere of ball lightning in his hand.

"Physics lesson, science 101. What happens when you combine metal with electricity?"

"Uhhhh..." The Koopatrols took a step back. "Oh no..."

Luigi held out his hand and lightning shot from his palm, striking one Koopatrol square in the chest. The hapless turtle spasmed and babbled as lightning coursed through him before chaining off his armor, hitting several of his fellows. Pretty soon, over half the entire force was twitching around and shining like an 'Eat at Joe's' sign. They did this for several seconds before the electricity finally dissipated, leaving them black and crispy. The lead Koopatrol let out a weak cough before falling over backward, the others quickly joining him. The few Koopatrols who were spared this fate gaped at their comrades in shock before slowly turning toward Luigi.

"So…" He smirked as he lifted the brim of his hat with his index finger, still sparking with electricity. "Who's next?"

"Fall back!" one of the Koopatrols screamed. "Fall back! Retreat!"

As they ran off, Luigi let out a breath. "That's what I thought."

That was when he heard an explosion coming from the castle, pulling him back to reality.

"No time to celebrate! Yoshi! We need to move!"

As they took off, Luigi turned to Yoshi.

"So, how the heck did you do that egg thing?"

"Hmmmmm…" Yoshi tapped his chin. "Yoshi dunno. Egg just happen."

"Ehhh…right…"

Tube City

Meanwhile, Mario jumped and dodged around Piranha Plants as Ludwig continued to conduct the organ, playing a loud, earth-shaking rendition of Beethoven's 5th. As he played, the Piranha Plants lunged at him.

"How do you enjoy my Koopa Symphony, Mario?!" Ludwig bragged as Mario narrowly avoided getting chomped. "It'll bring the house down!"

"Stop hiding behind your overgrown weeds!" the red plumber snapped. "Are you afraid to fight me yourself, you cowardly snake?!"

"First off, I'm a turtle, not a snake. If you're going to insult me, do it right. Second, hardly! I just feel like letting my music do the talking!"

Ludwig did a dramatic flourish. Multiple giant Piranha Plants lunged at Mario from different angles. Mario dodged, jumped, and rolled in each direction, avoiding them as best he could

"Just give it up, Herr Fatso! My Piranha Pipe Organ is unstoppable! All you can do is dodge!"

"I don't know when to quit! Ask anyone!"

"Regardless, you can't avoid them forever! Before this day is done, you're plant food!"

While this was going on, Toad was trying his best to avoid getting eaten. He cowered behind a pipe as a Piranha Plant came out of it. However, this one was a bit strange. It seemed a bit bigger than average, and its head was a darker color. Also, it didn't make to attack, simply holding a leaf to its mouth as if to shush Toad. He blinked before realization dawned.

"Are...Are you the king of Tube City?"

The plant nodded.

"Please tell me you know some way to shut this organ down."

The plant pointed into the pipe he was in, then sank back down into it.

"Well, when in Tube City…

He jumped into the pipe, something he immediately regretted as he was sent shooting through the pipe like a bullet, crashing into walls as the Pipe King slid through easily.

"BAD IDEAAAA!"

Eventually, he emerged, flopping out like a ragdoll.

"Owwwww… seriously...what is wrong with these pipes?" Toad looked up, finding himself in a dark place.

'Whoa… Where am I?"

Suddenly, a loud noise went off. Toad covered his "ears" with a yelp.

"Okay, ow! Loud!" He perked. "Wait...am I inside the organ!?"

Toad pulled out a flashlight from his pack and turned it on.

"Whoa…" he found himself staring down a massive network of thorny, green vines. "Oh man… yeah, this is inside the organ alright. And these are the stems of those people eating deathberries. Which means I can take it down from inside!"

He thought for a minute before digging through his bag.

"Please tell me I brought something that can kill big, ugly plant things." He pulled out a pair of large garden shears. "This'll do! Hey King! Make sure I don't prune you!"

Toad charged ahead, holding his shears like a sword and letting out a mighty yell.

-X-

Meanwhile, Mario narrowly avoided another plant. He was starting to get winded. Ludwig chuckled darkly.

"Perfect. Just like I thought. Mario's starting to lose steam. Which means it's time for the curtain to fall on the final act." He cracked his knuckles. "TEAR HIM APART!"

As the Piranha Plants all lunged at him with a roar en masse, Mario, realizing he was in no shape to dodge anymore, stood tall, closing his eyes and bracing himself… only for the plants to freeze right before they could strike. Ludwig blinked in confusion. "Huh?"

Mario slowly cracked one eye open, looking to see they had all stopped.

"What are you waiting for?! Eat him!"

Suddenly, the plants all began writhing in pain, screeching. They began withering before shrinking back into the pipes one by one.

"What's going on?! What happened to my plants?!"

Mario, panting, just smiled. "You were so... focused on me… you forgot... I didn't come alone."

Ludwig perked. "The Toad! He got into my organ?!"

At that very moment, Toad burst out of a pipe above, scatting a cheerful tune (3) before landing before them, bowing. Ludwig scowled.

"Well, it's not over yet! My Piranha Plants wore you down, Mario! I can take you easily!" He waved the wand, unleashing another shape blast. "This is the curtain call, Super Mario! GAME OVER!"

That was when the transmuted Pipe King burst out of the pipe in front of Mario, taking the hit.

"NO!" Ludwig screamed.

In place of the Piranha Plant was a slim man in a simple suit and tie, monocle on his face and a sash across his waist.

"I don't think so," the king said as he pulled off his sash, using it like a whip to yank the wand from Ludwig's hand. Ludwig fumed before chuckling darkly.

"Well, it doesn't matter anyway. We still win. While you and your friends have been chasing us Koopalings all over the world, we've been gearing up for the final phase of King Dad's master plan. Your sister will be bringing Princess Peach back to the Dark Lands any minute now." He laughed evilly before jumping back into a Warp Pipe. "Enjoy the reunion, Mario!"

Mario stood there, fists clenched.

"You... you think Luigi and Yoshi got to her in time?" Toad asked. Mario: All I know is we need to get back to Toad Town ASAP.

"This way," the pipe king commanded, motioning for the pair to follow him. "You haven't much time."

The Pipe King led them to a lone warp pipe, tapping on it before fishing into his jacket.

"This pipe will take you to Toad Town," he explained, handing a slip of paper to Mario. "And here are some additional directions to make your trip a little easier. Consider it payment for saving my city. Or...what's left of it."

"Yeah... sorry we didn't get here sooner," Mario replied, looking over the directions before turning back to him. "Thank you, sir-"

When he looked back, the Pipe King was gone.

"Huh? Where did he...?" Mario turns to Toad, who just shrugged, looking just as surprised as him. "...Doesn't matter. we've got a job to do."

Mushroom Kingdom

Blue Hood and Peach were trading blows back and forth, their individual fighting styles clashing wildly. While it was clear that Peach had the upper hand when it came to experience, the Blue Hood's armor and equipment kept them at a stalemate.

"That's quite the suit of armor you've got," Peach let out, trying to catch her breath. "Never seen anything like it."

"An Iggy Koopa special! The Koopa Soopa Suit. I fell down a beanstalk and survived thanks to this stuff!"

Peach lunged at the Hood, only for her opponent to grab the Princess in a headlock. Before she could free herself, the armored soldier used the power of their Thwomp Stompers to leap straight up, smashing clean through the roof of the castle. They grapple in the air before Hood spun Peach around, holding her out to ensure she would take the brunt of the fall while growling with increasing rage. They slammed down heavily, skidding across the floor. Peach managed to get up, readying herself as the Hood charged.

As soon as they were close enough, Peach swung up with the halberd, cracking the Hood in their chin with enough force to lift them off their feet. The blow knocked their helmet off as they fell and it rolled across the ground as Blue Hood hit the ground face-first, groaning in pain

Peach went to press her advantage but then saw something in the helmet. She approached it, pulling out a magenta cap monogrammed with the initials MP, one identical to the ones Mario and Luigi wore. That was when she recalled all the times the brothers mentioned a little sister. Slowly, her gaze turned to Blue Hood, who got up and faced the princess, revealing the face of a teenage human girl with medium-length brown hair, blue eyes, freckled cheeks, and a similar round nose to the Bros. Peach's jaw dropped, recognizing the girl from their experience in Subcon.

"No…" she gasped. "It can't be... you're…"

"Mary Pat Marionetti (4). The Mario Sister." MP smirked. "Now then, you done fighting yet, Princess?'"

Peach slowly dropped the halberd, holding out her wrists in surrender. MP raised an eyebrow.

"Giving up already? Aww… and I was having fun."

Nonetheless, she scooped up Peach, throwing her over her shoulder like she was luggage. As her cap fluttered to the ground, MP looked at it only briefly, her expression softening before she stepped on it in contempt. She pulled out a piece of paper, scribbling something on it before impaling both it and her cap on a knife and flinging it into the wall.

"We're leaving!" she commanded. "All hands to the Doom Ship! We make for the Dark Lands!"

-X-

Luigi and Yoshi hurried past the downed Koopatrols, running for Peach's Castle. As they made their way up the castle steps, they heard the sound of a Warp Pipe being activated just outside the castle. They stopped, seeing Mario and Toad emerging.

"Bro!" Luigi called out.

"Where's Mips?!" Mario exclaimed.

"Inside! I saw smoke coming from the throne room balcony!"

They hurried inside, dashing up the stairs and arriving at the aforementioned balcony. They stopped short to see the Blue Hood with the battered Peach over their shoulder. They glared at Mario and Luigi in sheer naked contempt before giving the two a rude gesture with their free hand as the docking platform closed. Both of them were left frozen, staring at the retreating Doom Ship as Yoshi and Toad took stock of everything. Toad ended up spotting MP's cap knifed to the wall, a letter under it. He pried the knife loose, looking over the note. As he read it, he grimaced, then brought it over to the brothers.

"You… might want to read this."

With shaking hands, Mario took the note and began to read.
"Yo! I had the princess kidnapped while you were running around playing with my kids. She's here in the Dark Lands if you dare to try and rescue her. GWA HA HA HA... King of the Koopas, Bowser."

Beneath Bowser's taunting message, in handwriting both brothers recognized as MP's, was scrawled, "P.S.: You can keep the cap."

Luigi slowly picked up MP's damaged cap. He held it to his chest before collapsing to his knees in tears. Mario joined him mere seconds later, crushing the note in his hands. Yoshi and Toad stood off to the side, nothing but sympathy on their faces as they wished they could do something to alleviate the despair of the moment.

Author's Note:

((1): German for "my friends"

(2): A reference to Yoshi's Story, where only the white and black Yoshis could eat peppers without taking damage.

(3): The classic Super Mario Bros. level clear theme.

(4): This is a headcanon proposed by legobiwan on Tumblr about the true last name of the Mario Brothers. Link here: https tumblr com legobiwan 722838312836071424 opthis-is-genius-this-explains-so-much-im?source=share

The endgame is coming. Will MP and Peach be saved?

Voice cast for this chapter:

* Pipe King - Rino Romano (Bruce Wayne/Batman in The Batman, Spider-Man in Spider-Man Unlimited, Uncle Tony in The Super Mario Bros. Movie)