Jake woke up with a start, breathing heavily and looking around wildly. He was in his room, in his bed.

He was alone.

What the fuck?

His head hurt. His face hurt. Was that a dream? His own brother did not tie him up and fuck him. Or drug him. Or make him feel so damn good. Fear and doubt and confusion pooled in Jake's stomach and he stumbled out of bed towards the bathroom. He barely made it to the toilet before he was heaving. Powerful contractions wracked his body. It made his face hurt even more.

"Fuck," Jake croaked between heaves. His mind was whirling in circles, not able to grasp any concrete answers. What the fuck. He got straight into the shower since he was still naked. He turned up the heat until the water hitting him caused his skin to steam. It hurt everywhere but mostly his beautiful face. Which wasn't looking so beautiful right now.

Jake stared at the drain unblinking for some amount of time that felt like a second and a year. The water swirled down into it, uncaring, unfeeling. What about him? What was he supposed to feel? What was he supposed to do?

For once Jake heard a knock on the door instead of someone just barging in. Oh yeah, he still had a life, a job, fans, money. That's what really mattered. He could focus on that. He could just tell everyone that he fell down the stairs onto his face or something.

The day passed quickly, the content was filmed. Jake heard nothing from Logan. He checked his brother's social media and saw him posting things as usual. As if it had never happened. Angrily, Jake typed up a text and hovered his thumb over the send button. He was impulsive, so it should already be sent, but he was hesitating. He read the text again.

"Yo wtf bro? you didn even callme 2day? WHAT THEFUCKDID U to ME?"

Jake deleted it. He would wait for Logan to text him, to explain himself. He was not going to give in first. He was going to go along and pretend it didn't happen, either. Jake went onto his own social media and posted pictures of his beat up looking face, making up an elaborate tale about how it happened. He immediately got a hefty amount of sympathy and derision in equal measures. Usual.

The younger Paul brother looked out of a window into darkness. How had nighttime crept up so fast? He walked to the bottom of the stairs and gazed up them, suddenly feeling nervous about going back into his room. Nah, he wasn't going to sleep there tonight. Instead Jake found a large plush blanket and burrito'd himself onto a couch.

The next morning was uneventful, as far as it went for a Paul brother. Filming, pranks, stunts, PR, social media, merch. The next day was the same. He didn't have any trips planned soon, but maybe he would go somewhere. He had yet to sleep in his own bed again, and he had heard nothing from Logan at all. He was starting to get fed up with that shit. Cocooning himself in his blanket couch burrito again, Jake stared at his phone. He was willing a notification from Logan to pop up, but it didn't.

"WHAT THE FUCK BRO"

Jake sent that before he could talk himself out of it. That motherfucker had better respond. Sighing, Jake flopped to the side and pulled his legs up. He switched between social medias for a while and was about to put his phone down to sleep when Logan's notification sound blared through. Jake jumped and sucked in a breath, not expecting his brother to actually get back to him in a timely manner. He quickly opened the text, but it wasn't a text. It was a video.

Again Jake hesitated. There had been a camera guy. What if it was that? Stupid motherfucker. Would he really send that to him?! Well, it had happened in the first place, so Jake supposed Logan wasn't above sending the evidence to him. He played the video.

He and Logan fucked. He and Logan kissed. He moaned. He came. Logan came. It was expertly edited, and both of their faces were plain to see. Logan's wasn't crazy, as Jake had thought. It was... something. The younger Paul stared blankly at his phone after it was over. If this got out, he would like, go to pervert jail or something.

But so would Logan.

So why did Logan send him this?!

"That didn answer myqustin fukker. WHATTHEFUCK. IM GONNA LEEKTHIS all oVER. YOU GOING TO JAILBR."

Jake sent the text and glared at his phone for just a few seconds before Logan answered him.

"Bro do u rlly think thats the only version?"

Jake's thumbs moved to reply, but then he noticed the icon for Logan typing. He waited. Another video popped up. Jake watched it. It was the same thing, but Logan's face was cut off. It was just Jake moaning, getting boned by some dude now. They took out all of the times Jake called out his brother's name too. Jake was dumbfounded. He stared at the phone and kept staring as it faded to black. After a moment, Logan's stupid notification sound again. Jake ground his teeth together and opened it.

Another video. This time both their faces were cut off and their tattoos were removed. Just two dudes going at it, moaning. What the fuck.

"Logan."

"Here's what your gonna do."

Jake waited.

"Actually cum to my house RITE NOW"

"NO I NVR WA SEE U AGIN"

"JAKE GET HERE OR I"M LEAKING"

"FUKKKKKKKKKK"

"That's what I thought. Come on over, little bitch bro!"

Jake flung the blanket off and threw his phone across the room, screaming in frustration. The phone shattered and Jake raged more. He got into a boxing position and started to punch the walls. He punched a few holes before his fists became bloody and he stopped. He went up to his room before anyone could come out and confront him. He stripped and went through his wardrobe, throwing everything on the ground before he found an old shirt. It was pretty much from before either of them had become famous, something that Logan would recognize. Deep in his brain Jake was trying to protect himself. If Logan saw this shirt, it would remind him of his little brother and the time he helped him when he had scraped all the skin off his knees. Logan couldn't do anything to him if he remembered that, right?

Storming down to the garage, Jake got into his Lambo. He peeled out and floored it, not caring about if he got pulled over and not caring so much about traffic laws. He could probably die on the way to his brother's house, but he didn't even think about that. He didn't think about anything until he was getting waved through to Logan's house.

Shit.

His brother was in there.

Jake's shield of anger was cracking already. Still, he got out and stormed up to the door and didn't bother to knock. He flung it open and inhaled.

"YOU OWE ME A NEW PHONE MOTHERFUCKER!" He screamed, almost hoping that Logan was vlogging or something so he could ruin it. No such chance. Logan slid up from where he was sitting nearby and came right up to Jake, shoving the door closed and planting a kiss on his brother's lips at the same time.

The younger Paul was too stunned to react for a second, and by then it was too late to retaliate.

"WHAT THE FUCK. STOP DOING THIS TO ME!" Jake screamed, even angrier and louder. Logan laughed.

"Your face is looking better, bro," he said, reaching up to touch it. Jake slapped it away and threw a punch at Logan, who dodged.

"What, no love for your bro?"

"NO! NOW COME HERE SO I CAN KILL YOU!" Jake lunged at Logan, who caught him. They rolled onto the ground where Jake proceeded to try to hit Logan everywhere he could. Logan was bigger and was trained just as much as he was however, so soon Logan had his stupid long legs around Jake's neck.

"Git yer fukking legs off me!" Jake choked out, gasping for breath.

"Only if you calm the fuck down, shit," Logan said. Jake didn't say anything, so Logan released him. Jake jumped to his feet, arms out in a boxing stance.

"Come on. Get up. Let's finish this."

Logan stood, but he kept his arms by his sides. "No, we're not doing that today. You're here to talk."

"THEN WHY THE FUCK DID YOU KISS ME?!" Jake was getting more upset by the second. He wanted to physically rip Logan's face off and eat it.

"Cause you're cute?" Logan said with a shrug. Jake stared at him, mouth open. Then it snapped closed and he snarled.

"WHAT THE FUCK?! STOP IT. STOP PRETENDING EVERYTHING IS FINE. IT'S NOT FINE. YOU FUCKED ME WITHOUT CONSENT!" Jake suddenly realized what that meant. He took a step back. "YOU RAPED ME! YOU RAPED ME! YOU RAPED ME! YOU'RE MY BROTHER!"

"CALM DOWN AND I'LL EXPLAIN!" Now Logan looked mad, and that just made Jake even more mad.

"NO! YOU CAN'T JUST EXPLAIN WHY YOU RAPED SOMEONE! I FUCKING HATE YOU AND I HOPE YOU DIE!" Jake lunged again. This time there was no holding back for either of them. Jake punched Logan in the face, who then kneed him in the stomach. Jake's breath left him and he stumbled back, while Logan swept a leg under the younger brother's legs. Jake went careening onto his back, knocking the breath out of him again. Logan was on him in a second, and in a moment of panic and fear Jake just held up his arms over his face. This was too familiar, this was making him feel weird, he hated everything and everyone in the whole entire world-

The first blow landed on Jake's forearm and he curled in tighter on himself. Logan was sitting on his crotch and the weird feeling continued. Logan stopped and Jake peeked at him between his arms.

"Are you getting hard?"

The fact that Logan whispered it made it worse. The words hung in the air between them for an eternity. Jake watched as one of Logan's eyes actually got swollen and closed from the punch earlier. Jake was at half mast now. It was undeniable.

"Bro, you been thinking bout me?" Logan looked excited. He licked his lips.

Jake didn't say anything. He hated himself at this very moment, more than he ever had. He just breathed, glaring up at his older brother.

Logan leaned down, planting his hands on either side of Jake's head. They were inches apart again. Jake's heart started beating faster, betraying him. Blue eyes met brown and seemed to get lost in each other for a moment. Logan was kissing Jake again before he realized it. Jake wrapped his arms around Logan's neck, drawing him closer. Logan lay flush against him and Jake could feel his bulge now too. Fuck, what if Logan actually liked Jake like that?!

Logan pulled up after a moment and they stared at each other again.

"Fuck, your eyelashes are like a girl's."

Jake's longing look snapped instantly into a glare. "Get off me," he growled, shoving Logan to the side and getting up. He turned away for a second and felt Logan engulf him from behind. Logan's dick pressed up against his ass.

"I love when you wear this shirt. I haven't seen it for a long time," Logan whispered, giving Jake goosebumps.

"I said, get off me," Jake murmured, shoving at Logan's arms. The older brother held on tighter.

"Let me fuck you. That ass is calling to me," Logan said, rolling his hips up against Jake. He reached down to grasp the younger Paul's bulge, making him gasp.

"Bro, get off me I'M NOT LETTING YOU DO THAT TO ME AGAIN." Jake struggled and Logan let go. The younger Paul whirled around to see Logan hold up his phone. One of the videos was on it.

"You know what this is. Let me fuck you or else this goes out."

Jake glared, all of his anger focusing into laser beams from his eyes, at least in his mind.

"Did I mention how much I fucking hate you?"

Logan laughed. "You have! But I know it's not true. You were moaning my name at the end last time. Follow me," the older Paul said. He started towards the nearby stairs and Jake followed silently behind him. His brother had the best goddamn blackmail of all time on him, and Jake couldn't do a thing about it.

They went to Logan's room and the older brother locked the door behind them. Jake frowned.

"Are you going to rape me again?"

"No, of course not. If you let me fuck you, I'll have them post the version where we're both cropped out."

"Post it to where?!" Jake couldn't imagine where some gay fucking shit like that would go.

"Oh, there are a few sites that feature gay porn," Logan said. He began to take off his shirt, which made Jake shutter in disgust.

"How would you know that?! Are you really actually gay? What the fuck is actually happening with all of this shit?"

Logan threw his shirt to the side. His pants were low, revealing his Squirtle tattoo. "I'm not gay. I'm bi. But not really. Just bi for you." The matter of fact way Logan said it again threw Jake off.

"Bro, look me in the eyes and say that again," Jake said. He crossed his arms over his chest with a frown. Logan smiled and looked straight into his eyes.

"Jake, I am in love with you and I am bi only for you."

The silence exploded between them, almost deafening in the lack of noise. Only the sounds of the house being a house filled in the void. Logan was still smiling, and it was a real, sincere smile. Jake could tell.

"What... you—why did-? You can't just say that. You can't do that! You can't be in love with me, you stupid piece of shit!" Jake stepped forward and shoved Logan as hard as he could. The older brother cried out in surprise, but thankfully he just fell into a pile of blankets at the foot of the bed.

"JAKE! Just fucking stop for one second and let me EXPLAIN!" Logan screamed, getting back to his feet.

"Why should I listen to a rapist?!" Jake backed away as Logan came closer, though he held up his fists. They were still a little bloody and a lot bruised from earlier but he was going to punch the shit out of Logan if he had to. Jake gasped as he hit the door and he fumbled with the lock while still keeping his eyes on Logan. The older brother cornered him, pressing him up against the door and grabbing his arms.

"Loga-"

"No. Shut the fuck up and listen. After we came here to L.A. and started to do our own things, I saw a change in you. You weren't just my brother anymore. You were a famous dude. A youtube influencer. Someone who has his whole future ahead. I know I do too, but damn you grew up fast and –like, fuck." Logan stepped back and rubbed the back of his head a few times. Jake didn't move, though he relaxed a tiny bit.

Logan began pacing, not able to harness his energy. "We spent so much time apart after we got out here. We each had our own thing, right? Whenever I checked in on you, you looked more mature and like... more sexy. Me too, but damn bro. I started to feel weird whenever I saw you in person or a new pic, and I had no idea what it was. It's hard for me to like, like... you know. Connect with feelings sometimes. I ignored it. I pushed it away. But then one day you started to post pics of you in your damn underwear and one of my friends was all like 'Baby bro lookin' fine' and showed it to me as a joke and I was like 'Fuck off I'll kill you if you say that again about my little brother', and then that night I looked at that stupid picture and I-" Logan stopped moving and talking and looked at Jake again.

"What?" Jake said, scared to know the answer. This was too much, this was wrong, this was stupid, Logan was stupid for feeling like this. He needed to talk to someone about it, he needed to delete his contact information from his phone-

"I bust a nut to it, OKAY?! I THOUGHT ABOUT YOU AND YOUR STUPID ASS AND I JERKED MYSELF OFF ALONE IN MY ROOM. THIS ROOM. I DID THAT," Logan screamed, jabbing himself in the chest. "I DID THAT AND I HATED MYSELF FOR IT. I DID EXTREMELY STUPID SHIT TO GET YOU OUT OF MY GODDAMN HEAD AFTER THAT!" Logan continued to scream and stomp around. Jake watched him, not able to comprehend what he was hearing. His brother, his brother Logan Paul thought about him and rubbed one out. He thought about his little brother and got so fucking hard that he came.

"I KEPT THINKING ABOUT YOU AND I CAN'T GET YOU OUT OF MY HEAD. I HAVE NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT A CHICK THIS MUCH BEFORE. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO! SO I CAME UP WITH MY PLAN TO FUCK YOU BECAUSE YOU WOULD NEVER LET ME DO IT ON YOUR OWN. And oh fuck, it was the best fucking fuck because it was you Jake." Logan stopped, his chest heaving. He had a pleading and confused sort of look on his face, and Jake knew it was true. His brother was in love with him.

"It's true about the views though. On those sites we're going to get so many views. 'Older brother fucks younger brother'. Little will they know we're actually brothers."

Jake was pressed flat against the door, almost as if the force of Logan's words had flung him there. He had no idea what to do, what to think, what to feel. What did someone do when their sibling confessed to them? Jake was disgusted at the very least. That much was true. But …. after he was full of drugs and sucked off he had liked it. He loved his brother yes, but just as a brother. He could never love Logan the way Logan loved him. That was fucking gay and incestuous.

"Look. I appreciate you saying all that's on your mind. It takes a lot to do that, believe me. But bro, you're my bro and we can't-"

"Stop. Just stop there. Do you remember that I have the videos? Do you want the version where it's us, or just you getting fucked?"

"Logan, why would you want the one with both of us to be out there?" Jake asked, genuinely curious.

The older brother sighed and stared at the ground for a second before meeting Jake's eyes again. "Because I don't care anymore. It would just be the latest in the long line of crazy shit I've done, right? 'Oh my god, Logan Paul fucked his brother Jake Paul! What were they thinking filming it?' or 'The Paul brothers are gay—FOR EACH OTHER!'. I don't care, don't you get it? I fucking—I fucking love you and want you and the only way that's going to happen is to blackmail you. I know you don't see me the same way. So I have to do it like this. I don't care if everyone knows, cause I love you."

What was Jake supposed to say? What the fuck was he supposed to say?

"Logan. Like, I'm not sure what you want me to say. I don't like you like that. You're my brother. You'll always be my brother. Just my brother. I'm not gay, I'm not bi. I don't want your dick. "

"I know. That's where the second part of my plan comes in," Logan said. He sat on the edge of his bed, eyes empty as he just stared forward. "We're going to do porn or else I leak the videos."

"We're WHAT?"

"Come back here tomorrow night."

Jake came up to the bed. Logan looked up at him, any emotion that he'd been showing gone. He looked just... empty.

"Bro, we're not doing porn-"

Logan held up his phone and showed Jake the screen. It was a text log, with Terry's name at the top.

"Let me know what # to post," was Terry's last text.

"All I have to do is send a number and whole planet will know." Logan's voice was empty, too. Had Jake done that?

"Bro-"

"2." Logan typed and said. He paused over the send button, giving Jake an out.

"Fuck. Okay! Fuck, don't send it!"

Logan nodded. "3." That one he sent. Jake stared at the phone. His body was going to be out there, being fucked. No one would recognize him without his face, right?

"I'll send you the link when it's uploaded," Logan said, messing with his phone now. Jake automatically reached for his pocket where his phone wasn't.

"Shit. You still owe me a phone."

Logan looked up. "What the fuck are you talking about? What did you do?" A little life sparked back into the older brother's eyes. Jake felt relieved, somehow. Maybe dead and lifeless was not how he liked to see his brother.

"When you texted me earlier telling me to come over here I was so fucking mad, I threw my phone. It shattered."

Logan laughed. "Your texts did looked pretty pissed. Let's go get you one right now. I gotta keep my bitch on tap."

"Okay don't call me that, like seriously. I'm not your bitch, and I'm only doing this because you'd release the video otherwise," Jake said. Logan didn't say anything as he put his shirt back on and then some shoes. He popped up and unlocked the door, holding it open for Jake.

"Ladies first!"

"Fuck off," Jake grumbled. This was still getting too weird. The confession had made him super uncomfortable but, like, relieved at the same time? At least he knew what was going on with Logan, even if it was something stupid.

Heading outside, they got into Logan's vehicle and pulled out of the driveway. Logan put on the GPS to the nearest Apple store. He turned on the sound system to sync with his phone and scrolled while they idled at the end of the driveway. He scrolled for a second and then stopped and stared at Jake.

"What?"

Logan pressed on his phone and instantly "I Love You Bro" started playing. Suddenly, the song took on a whole new meaning.

"No, I'm not singing! I'm not in love with you! I just love you normally!" Jake tried, but Logan just started singing both of their lines. He drove out onto the road and accelerated, happily bobbing his head. Despite everything, Jake found himself singing along to his parts of the song. Logan started singing more exuberantly, making Jake do the same. Soon they were screaming out the lyrics and laughing when it was over. They played more songs they both knew and sang along with. By the time they got to the store, Jake was almost feeling normal about Logan. They got out and made it into the store without anyone recognizing them but the first store employee did.

"Logan Paul! And Jake Paul!"

They were swarmed and had to take a few minutes to take pictures with everyone and sign things before being able to get an employee to themselves.

"What brings you two in?" she asked, eyes bright.

Logan put an arm around Jake's shoulders. The younger Paul fought with himself to not yank out of the embrace. Logan pulled 0ut his phone and started recording.

"I made my little bro break his phone, awwwww, so I'm buying him a new one! And any case he wants. Even one of mine!" Logan said happily into the camera, laughing. Jake switched to vlogging mode as well automatically.

"Yeah right, like I'd rep your brand bro! Let's take a look at the phones! It better be better than the one I broke!" It felt so forced and fake, but what else could Jake do but play along? Logan could still get Terry to upload a different version of The Video at any time.

They looked quickly over the available phones with Logan vlogging the whole thing. Jake got the newest, most expensive phone, case, and screen protector they had, as well as at least five different chargers. Logan comically paid the bill with cash, and they left.

Jake started messing with the phone once they were in the vehicle again. Logan played lowkey music.

"Hey listen."

Jake looked up, not knowing what to expect any more. It made him feel out of control and frustrated, and he hated feeling like that. Would Logan stop the car and fuck him in the back? Would he pull out a gun and threaten him? Would he lean over and tenderly kiss his lips, leaving him wanting more?

"I know this whole situation is like, really fucked up. I put all this on you and I know it's a lot," Logan said. They were at a red light. A few people around them recognized Logan's vehicle and were honking, but he ignored them.

"I just had to do something, you know? It was eating me up inside. More than anything else ever had. You can hate me for all eternity, but like, I was at the end Jakey. I was pretty much at the fucking end," Logan said. The light turned green. Jake looked down at his hands around his phone. This was so much for a little brother to process.

"So what do you mean?" he said quietly.

"I mean. Hah, what do I mean? I mean that I was going to do something bad. On purpose. Worse than the forest. Something super dangerous. I didn't want to put this all on you. I almost did it. I almost did it. I had everything planned out. I couldn't take it tearing me up anymore. How could this ever work? It couldn't work. I was so in my own head... The only thing that saved me was you. I thought about what it would do to you if I did it. Even if you never love me like I love you, you'd lose your brother. I couldn't do that to you."

Jake was silent. He couldn't process this. He couldn't be the reason Logan had almost done something incredibly stupid-and he couldn't be the reason he didn't! He didn't know what to say! These past few days had been kinda like that. Confusion and anger and more confusion. They lapsed into silence for the rest of the drive. Logan pulled up to his house and turned off the engine.

"I'll text you in a few days." Logan said, and slid out of the vehicle. He walked back to the house and inside without looking back. Jake sat in his vehicle for a few minutes, thinking.

That was the problem, really. He didn't know what to think. How could anyone think through a mess like this? Sighing heavily, Jake got out and into his Lambo.