Jasper's leg twitches as passes around the sheet of paper, chewing on his lip as she sets it on his desk, the light reflecting off her glasses as she glares down at him, "No getting out of it this time, Mr. Dunlop."

Jasper peers up, protesting, "But, Ms. Shapen-"

She cuts him off, "Parent-teacher conferences are mandatory for everyone."

"Yes, Ma'am." Jasper groans, flopping his head down onto the desk.

"C'mon, Ms. Shapen." Henry wines, "I'm eighteen. Why can't I be my own guardian?"

"Swellview School District considers your parents your guardian until you graduate." She states, "These conferences are mandatory if you want to make it to graduation."

Parent-teacher conferences are practically impossible for Jasper when he doesn't have a parent- or rather a decent parent to show up.

His mom is usually not sober enough to hold a civil conversation, and the last time he saw his dad was when he and his mom were fighting over custody because neither of them wanted him.

Usually, his grandma would show up for the day since she was the only one who cared about appearances and how their family was perceived.

Therefore, getting her there wasn't usually a hassle, though she wouldn't be able to make it this time unless he somehow resurrected her from the dead because she died at the beginning of last year.

Which is the whole reason he had to skip the conferences last semester.

"I have extra credit assignments available," She announces, eyeing Jasper and Henry, "Anyone who wants to get their grades before your parents come in on Monday should take advantage of this. Class dismissed."

Henry mutters something under his breath as walks out of the classroom before turning to his friends, "My parents are gonna kill me."

"Same," Jasper lies, lifting his head. "My mom will freak out."

She won't even care. She never does.

"Hey, do you think Schwoz could make a shapeshifting device?" Jasper asks, leaning closer to Henry, voice hushed, "You could pretend to be my mom, and I'll pretend to be yours."

"I've never even met your mom, dude." Henry states, "Besides, I doubt you could pull off pretending to be my mom anyway."

"Come on, Hen," Jasper pleas, leaning farther over until the majority of his body is hanging off the side of the desk, "Please, pretty, pretty, please, let me, your bestest- coolest- most awesomest friend." He begs, head pressing into Henry's shoulder as he bats his eyelashes at him, "Be your mom?"

"Sure," Henry answers with a mischievous smirk rising on his lips, turning back in his seat, "Wanna pretend to be my mom, Char?"

"Nah," Charlotte declines, irritation in her eyes but fondness in her voice, "I'm good."

Jasper yells, "Hey!-"

He abruptly loses his balance and tumbles out of his seat. Jasper's head smacks the floor, making his vision blurry as he squints. Henry is sitting above him, expression mixed between humor and worry as he leans over his desk.

"Jeez..." Henry sighs, arms folding over the table as he looks down, "You okay?"

"Uh..." Jasper murmurs, pulse suddenly racing as he clears his throat, "Just peachy." He forces out, wearing a flustered dopey smile, letting his arms spread out across the floor, "I totally meant to do that."

Henry shakes his head, a soft snort huffing from his nose as he rises from his seat and moves towards Jasper.

"Sure you did, buddy." He hums, hand extending out as he crouches down, "Come on."

Jasper raises his own hand, unable to look away from Henry's soft brown eyes. He slides his fingers into Henry's palm, heart racing as he feels the warmth radiating off Henry's skin and is pulled up.

He beams, "Thanks, man."

To be honest, Jasper's not sure of the exact moment he realized he was gay. He suspects it was somewhere around fifth grade. All the other kids started dating and beginning their budding first romances, but Jasper wanted that with other boys- or, more specifically, a certain boy.

Henry.

Jasper always gets a bit too excited when his best friend enters the room. He'll take every opportunity to cling to him, and he sits as close as possible to Henry on the couch.

Every little interaction they have together fills Jasper with so much joy, which is why it hurts so much that Henry won't ever love him how he wants to be loved.

So Jasper hides. He's always been good at hiding. It's second nature to pretend that his stomach doesn't spin and his heart doesn't stutter whenever they're together because being in love with Henry is not worth losing him.

"Dude, let go of my hand." Henry's voice sparks in one ear and out, muffled in the back of his otherwise occupied mind as he calls out to him, making Jasper lift his gaze.

"Hm?"

"Dude," Henry repeats, wiggling his fingers, "Let go of my hand."

Farts, had he been holding on this whole time? Noticeably, way too long...

Jasper plays it off as a joke and tightens his grip, "Nah."

"Nah?" Henry mimics in confusion, "I should've just left you on the floor." He mutters, trying to yank himself free, "Charlotte! Jasper won't let go!"

Before Charlotte gets a chance to scold them, Jasper takes her hand too.

"Jasper," Charlotte sighs, shooting him a playful look of irritation, "We don't have time for this. We gotta go to work."

"What are we waiting for then?" Jasper smirks, "C'mon, let's get moving."

Henry's eyes widened slightly, face paling, "You're not seriously gonna make us walk all the way to work like this."

"Uh-huh." Jasper confirms, childishly swinging their hands back, "I absolutely am."

"I am doing this begrudgingly!" Henry announces in annoyance as Jasper drags them out into the hall, "Dude, your palm is so sweaty."

"His hand isn't sweaty for me," Charlotte notes as Jasper leads them out of the school.

"Well, that's not fair!" Henry complains, peering past Jasper to meet Charlotte's eyes, "Switch with me."

"No way." Charlotte snorts, head shaking, "I don't wanna hold Jasper's sweaty hand."

"It's a privilege to hold my sweaty hand," Jasper chides, walking them down the street, "You should both feel lucky."

He had loosened his grip the second he pulled them into the hallway, making it easy for them to break free if they really wanted to, but neither of them did.

So, they held hands the entire way to Junk-N-Stuff, only pulling away when they stopped in front of the store.

"Finally!" Henry cheers, smearing the sweat off his palm by whipping it off on Jasper's shirt, "I call dibs on your non-sweaty hand next time."

"Next time?" Jasper teases, wiggling his fingers in Henry's face, "Awwe, you wanna hold my hand some more?"

Henry swats Jasper's arm away, "No. "

Jasper pivots on his heels, turning to face Henry with a smug shrug as he backs into the store, "Sure."

"Don't walk backwards," Charlotte warns, arms lifting in a panic, "You know Ray doesn't like it when you mess around. You always break stuff!"

"I do not-" Jasper starts, glass clashing behind him, "Break stuff..."

"Really?" Charlotte raises a brow, glancing down, "You literally just-"

"Oh, that?" Jasper cuts her off, gesturing to the freshly shattered vase behind him, "That was already broken." He claims, earning blank stares from his besties. Jasper deflates, shoulders slumping, "I'll go clean it up."

"Yeah." Charlotte agrees, pinching the bridge of her nose, "You will."

Jasper avoids looking into their eyes as he walks through the bead curtain and makes his way to the utility closet, grabbing the broom and dustpan. He feels their scrutinizing gaze as he kneels down to the floor, carefully sweeping up the shards of glass.

They always protect him from getting fired, even when they know Ray has every right to fire him because he's the worst employee here. He's too stupid to help with the smart projects like Charlotte and Schwoz, and he's not hero material like Ray and Henry.

He's counter boy.

Jasper's main job is to sit here and sell stuff. It's not that complicated, except it is. No matter how hard he tries, Jasper can't help but fidget. There's just so much fun stuff to fiddle with in the store.

Plus, he never had any real toys growing up, so when you put him in a room filled with cool stuff- his first instinct is to play with it.

Despite Jasper's financial whims and impulsive bucket purchases, he doesn't have much money. His parents never provided for him, and his grandma only gave him the bare necessities.

If Jasper wanted anything else, he had to get creative. This is why he's always needed money, even more than before after his grandma died.

Now, he's also responsible for paying the bills. This is why he'll pretty much go along with any of Piper's money-making schemes or take any random odd job someone is willing to give him.

"You guys don't need to watch me like that." He sighs into the air, flashing a smile to his friends, "I promise, I won't break anything else... Today."

"You said that last time," Henry states skeptically, glancing toward Charlotte, who nods in agreement as he continues, "But then you wanted to see if your head would fit inside a lawn chair."

"Then, you panicked," Charlotte adds, arms crossing over her chest, "You sounded the emergency alarm and broke half the shit in here because you couldn't get it off."

"What goes in must come out." Jasper defends, dumping the dustpan in the trash can before tossing it and the broom off to the side, "I just thought I could do it myself. I'm not helpless, just occasionally airheaded."

"Occasionally?" Henry snorts, earning a half-hearted glare from Jasper, "More like always."

Jasper tries to think of a clever response, but he doesn't have one, so he decides to fuck with Henry by pushing past him in an attempt to beat him to the elevator, "I'm a push the button first!"

"No!" Henry screeches, tackling him to the floor.

Jasper tries to shake Henry off, struggling as Henry holds him against the ground by laying on top of him, hands pinning his arms above his head, their faces merely inches apart.

"You pushed the button last time." Henry pants out, breath heavy as he glares down. "It's my turn."

"This is ridiculous, guys." Charlotte scolds, stepping over them and pushing the button herself.

"Ugh," Henry pouts, dropping his head into the crook of Jasper's neck, making Jasper's pulse race at the feeling of his breath against his skin as he lets out an overdramatic, frustrated cry, "Why?!"

"Because it's a pointless thing to fight over. Yet, you two do it every single day." She seethes, eyes rolling, "Now get off Jasper."

"Fine." Henry sighs, pushing himself up just enough to face Jasper again, poking him hard in the chest, "Only if he agrees to let me press the inside button."

Jasper struggles to find the words, secretly wanting to say no, so Henry will stubbornly stay right there. But, instead, he just reluctantly nods in agreement.

"That's what I thought," Henry states somewhat smugly as he pats Jasper's cheek, "Good boy."

Jasper inhales a sharp breath, face flushing before he swats him away, trying desperately not to look disappointed as Henry gets up.

They both rise to their feet and follow Charlotte into the elevator. Jasper stands in the middle, letting his gaze follow the movement of Henry's arm as he raises it, smilingly smugly as the button illuminates under his thumb.

Then, the floor drops.

Jasper finds it terrifying, yet he's the insane one. It has no interior wall and falls ten thousand feet down. If anything, they're crazy for not fearing it, too.

He instinctively clings to Henry for support, screaming as the wind wisps past their ears while blowing their hair up in the air.

Jasper's stomach lurches as the elevator comes to a halting stop, his heart still racing when the door slides open.

Schwoz is there. He's standing on the other side, proudly presenting a new invention.

"Ello," He greets enthusiastically, "Vant to see vhat I made?"

Henry pries off Jasper's bruising grasp and moves forward to inspect Schwoz's creation. Jasper and Charlotte follow his motion and crowds around it beside him.

"A truth blaster." Schwoz proudly presents, lifting the complicated-looking invention, "It vill make enemies tell vhe truth."

Jasper shuffles closer to Henry, peering at it over his shoulder, mentally noting to stay away from that thing.

"Sweet." Henry exclaims, eyes gleaming, "Can we use it to make Ray admit he ate all my frittle chips yesterday?"

"Vell..." Schwoz says, "Yes, but it vould be pointless. He von't remember admitting anyfing."

"So, like, the villains will reveal all their evil plots..." Charlotte interjects, a smile rising, "And they won't remember telling us?"

"Precisely." Schwoz answers, smiling, giggling, "It vill be so vunny."

"I can't wait to use it." Henry states, snagging it from Schwoz's hands, "Jasper, go stand over there."

"Nuh-uh, no way I'm letting you test this one on me." Jasper protests, "I just got rid of the rash from the last invention you guys made me test."

"Dhis one won't give you a wrash." Schwoz assures, "As long as you tell da truth, I'll be completely safe."

"You said that last time." Jasper drawls, waving his finger out, "I'm not doing it."

"Vhy?" Schwoz smirked. "Got someving to hide, Yasper?"

"What? Ha -ha! Me? nooo…" He lies, pressing his hand against his chest like he's offended, "I like- pssh, never, hide anything, ever."

Everyone stares at him with disbelief, which makes sense because he was intentionally being suspicious.

Henry narrows his eyes, leaning closer, studying Jasper's expression as he points the blaster at him, "Whatcha hiding?"

A lot.

"We all got secrets, Kid Danger ." Jasper chides, pushing the barrel out of his face, "But if you really wanna know. This one time in the shower, I-"

Everyone immediately screams, but Henry clasps his hand over Jasper's mouth, stopping any more words from leaving his mouth.

"On second thought," Charlotte interjects, taking the device from Henry, "Maybe we shouldn't use this on Jasper."

Weirdness for the win.

Henry can feel Jasper smirk against his palm before the warm wetness of a tongue licking him, and he instantly reels back.

"Gah- Dude!" Henry curses, wiping his hands on his pants, "Really?!"

Jasper opens his mouth to respond, but the alarm blares through the mancave before he gets the chance. They all spring into action, instantly crowding around the security monitors.

Ray runs in from the back and calls out to Charlotte, who had plopped down in the chair, "What's the emergency?"

Charlotte's fingers clicked frantically, pulling up security footage of Sushi Dushi's parking lot, "It looks like Jeff is back. He's trying to steal car radios."

"Nooo." Ray groans, running his hand down his face in frustration, "Not Jeff, ugh! "

"C'mon Ray," Henry calls, digging into his pocket for his gumtube, "We don't have time for your whining. We gotta suit up."

Jasper lets his eyes follow Henry's movements as he pops a gumball in his mouth.

He finds it oddly mesmerizing the way Henry's jaw constricts and tightens as he grinds the gum between his teeth, lips parting slightly when he blows the bubble.

Jasper's favorite part is when that bubble pops, and his and Ray's bodies are illuminated with all those bright colors as they transform.

Henry smirks as he turns to Ray and begins the quip, "Jeff excels at irritation…"

"So, we'll punch his face without hesitation." Ray finishes with a smirk before sharing a brief fist bump with his sidekick, "Let's go, kid."

Jasper waves them goodbye as they take off up the tubes, questioning aloud, "I wonder if it tickles."

Charlotte glances at him, "What?"

"Transforming." Jasper repeats, tilting his head, "Does it tickle?"

"No," Charlotte ponders, "I don't think so."

Schwoz interjects, "Do you vant it to tic- tiCALL?"

"Tic-al," Charlotte enunciates slowly, rolling her hand as she speaks, "Tickle."

"I can make it tic- ti-KlL," Schwoz attempts again, "TicckLE-"

"No." Charlotte denies, shaking her hand, "Firstly, just stop trying to say tickle. Secondly, don't mess with their transformations."

"Booo!" Jasper boos, giving her a thumbs down, "You're a fun sucker."

"Yah! You suck the funs!" Schwoz chants along, "Boo!"

Jasper's face lights up, and he abruptly grabs Schwoz's shoulders, "You know what could be really fun?"

Schwoz's eyes widened, "Vhat?"

"If you dressed up as my mom and pretended to be her for parent-teacher conferences!"

Schwoz answers a little too enthusiastically, "Yah!"

"No. "Charlotte interjects, spinning around in her seat, "Absolutely not, that would be a total disaster."

"C'mon, Char, don't be such a party pooper." Jasper groans, dropping his arms, "Schwoz already agreed."

"Yah..." Schwoz frowns, throwing a hand in the air, "Vhy not?"

"How exactly would you guys pull that off?" Charlotte questions, arms crossing over her chest, "Does he even look like your mom?"

"No, but that doesn't matter." Jasper argues, "We could put him in a curly-haired wig and a dress."

"Yah," Schwoz agrees, "I alveady gots those."

"It could totally work," Jasper insists, "It's not like has ever met my mom anyway."

"The school has never met your parents?" Charlotte questions, "Wait, we've never met them either."

"You've met my grammy." Jasper reminds her, "She's way cooler."

"Then why don't you just bring her?"

She's dead.

Jasper never told them. He's not quite sure why. Sometimes, he feels like he has to be the happy friend. They'll be disappointed in him if he doesn't fit that role.

"She's just busy this year." He explains, "Plus, I don't even know where my dad is, and my mom is weirder than me." Jasper states with a forced laugh, waving his hand up in dismissal, "She'd be institutionalized if I took her out in public. Which is why I usually took my grandma."

Charlotte narrows her gaze, unsure what to make of Jasper's claims.

"Schwoz is way more exciting anyway," Jasper continues, rubbing the bald spot on his head, "Which is why you should just let him fill in for my parent-teacher conference instead."

"Not happening," Charlotte states firmly, "Schwoz and used to date. What if she recognizes him."

"Uh, well," Jasper starts to sputter, voice waning slightly, "What about Ray? Do you think he'd be willing to-"

"Pffff," Schwoz cackles, pushing Jasper's arm away, "No vay is Ray villing to pretend to be your daddy. He don't evens like you."

"He does, too!" Jasper argues, knowing very well that Ray, in fact, does not like him.

"How about instead of trying to avoid taking your grandma because your grades are shit, you just put some effort into getting them up?" Charlotte suggests, patting his arm, "That way, you don't have to worry so much about her coming." She says, her tone softening into sincerity, "I'll help you."

Oh. So she caught on to his lie, but not enough to put together the real reason he was lying.

Charlotte's always been the hardest to fool.

Jasper's grades being bad is a reasonable guess. It's not typical for him to have bad grades. Though they've never been as good as Charlotte's or as bad as Henry's… until now.

Jasper's just been having difficulty getting his assignment done on top of all the task-bunny jobs he's been taking after work.

He gets paid the least at Junk-N-Stuff because his job is the least important, but he's still the only one working here with bills to pay.

That is another thing they didn't know about.

Jasper, perhaps, has a problem with being a tad overzealous and bends the truth. It was never something he did maliciously. It was just a habit formed from being young, poor, and embarrassed.

Charlotte rises from her seat and gestures out towards the elevator door, "C'mon, we'll work on the extra credit and watch the store."

Jasper throws his head back in defeat, shuffling behind her, "Okay."