Much as he wanted not to be anxious about coming face to face with Alexa, Jay felt like he might be about to crap himself when Clementine opened the front door and showed him into the house. Physically, Alexa was about as far away from intimidating as it was possible for a person to be, but mentally she was terrifying. He couldn't stop thinking that all she had to do was take one glance at him and his every thought and insecurity would be on full display for her to pick apart and analyse at her convenience.
"Come in. Come in," Clem said warmly, holding the door open as he carried his travel case over the threshold. He found himself in a hallway that looked as modern and clean as the neighbourhood outside. Effort had been made ahead of his visit.
"Lexi!" Clem called out.
"Hi! Be there in a second!" came Alexa's voice from somewhere at the back of the house.
"Let me take your coat. Leave your case here for now and I'll show you around," Clem said.
Jay set his case against the wall near the bottom of the stairs then took his coat off. He had just handed it over to Clem when Alexa appeared. The petite, gorgeous blonde had a warm smile on her face. None of it put Jay at ease in the slightest.
"Hi, Jay. It's nice to see you. Thanks for coming to help Clem with her character and storyline. It's very kind of you."
"Hey, that's no problem," he said, feeling sure that he sounded as awkward as he felt.
"Would you like something to drink? I know Clem's going to want coffee."
"You know me too well," Clem said, going over to her lover. "Hey, baby," she said before they kissed each other on the lips.
In other circumstances, with other women, Jay would have liked seeing that, finding it hot. But his relationship with Clem was one that wouldn't lead him to looking at her in that kind of way, and Alexa was simply too scary.
"Jay?" Alexa asked, waiting for his drink request.
"Coffee's fine. I'll take it the same as Clem's. Thank you."
"Come through, Jay. This is the living room," Clem said, leading the way in there.
"We like guests to feel welcome, so please treat the place like your home," Alexa said. "My only request is don't go into my office."
"No problem," Jay said, wondering what kind of top secret FBI material was in there. Did behaviour analysts even handle top secret material? He didn't know. Either way, he was more than happy not to go near it.
The house tour took five minutes. It was a nice, well cared for home, just not to Jay's taste. He wished he felt at home. If it had only been him and Clem, maybe he would have.
Clem had left him to take his travel case up to the bedroom he had been given. It was spacious and had a double bed that looked quite comfortable at first glance.
"Who cares about the fucking bed?" he grumbled to himself as he dumped his case onto it. He turned around and found himself looking at a mirror. He walked closer to it and glared at the reflection. For the first time in a while, he didn't like the person he saw looking back at him.
"Thought you were making progress," he told it.
He turned away from the mirror and took out his phone, wanting to see his lock screen – a beautiful selfie that Erin had once sent him. Looking at the picture didn't provoke the reaction he had expected. Rather than get on even more of a downer by wondering why she was with a loser like him, his brain went in the opposite direction and confidence returned to him. How or where from, he had no clue.
If Erin were here, she would simply talk to Alexa as if she was any other normal person, not one with mindreading abilities. That was a step too far for him, but he summoned the courage to go downstairs and be honest about how he felt. That could be a starting point at least, depending on how Alexa and Clem reacted to it. Either way, it was better than trying to bottle it up and feeling extremely uncomfortable the whole time.
Wanting to go through with it before the confidence had time to leave him again, he went straight out of the bedroom and down the stairs. When he walked into the living room, he found that things were already not going according to plan. Only Alexa was in there, sitting on a leather couch. Actually, that might be a good thing, he thought.
"Clem had to hit the bathroom. Have a seat," Alexa offered. There was a choice of two chairs that wouldn't mean sharing the couch with her. There were three cups of coffee on a low glass coffee table.
"Thanks," he said, choosing the closest chair. As soon as he sat down, he came out with what he needed to say. "I know what you do for the FBI. Makes me really uneasy being around you. Sorry if that comes across offensive."
"Not at all," Alexa assured him. "It makes me feel annoyed with myself actually. I shouldn't have told Clem what I told her about you. It was inappropriate and wrong. I apologise, Jay."
The apology was undoubtedly sincere. Jay appreciated it, but it didn't do much to address the problem. "I accept the apology," he said.
"Thank you. Because I made that mistake, I've likely caused you to get the wrong impression of what I do and how I do it. What I can assure you is that while you're a guest in my house, I won't be studying you or anything like that. I promise you that. Today and tomorrow, consider me nothing more than Clem's girlfriend, and I'm pleased to have you as a guest here."
Jay was surprised by his own reaction again. Alexa's sincerity had convinced him that being around her might not be so bad. Well, maybe not convinced him, he thought, but put him more at ease at least, that she might not sit there trying to dig around for the worst aspects of his character and his life.
"I'll do my best," he said, meaning it. To promise anything more would have been dishonest, and it was obvious she would have been able to tell that. She was used to being lied to by people who were a lot better at it than he was.
Alexa nodded, and changed the subject. "Clem was telling me the view from your house has to be seen to be believed." She laughed. "But she didn't take a picture, so I didn't get to see it or believe it. Bit of a fail on her part."
"I can show you," he said, taking his phone out of his pocket. He felt really glad to have something that was both easy and positive to talk to her about. It didn't take him long to find a photo taken from the deck at Eagle's Nest, not long after sunrise. Even he thought the picture was breath-taking, and he lived there. It was the best photo he had ever taken, in his opinion, not that he was any kind of photographer. He got up and handed the phone to Alexa.
"Oh my," she said as soon as she looked at the photo. "That's the view from your house? You wake up to that every day?"
"Yes. That was taken on our deck."
Clementine walked into the room, apparently having heard their last exchange. "You can see why they call it Eagle's Nest, can't you?"
"I'll say. You're blessed, Jay," Alexa said, handing the phone back to him.
"You're right," he said, feeling it deeply.
The three of them chatted for a while, drinking their coffees. Somewhat to his own surprise, Jay found himself settling into their company and their home. He really could do it, and Alexa actually wasn't terrifying. As with a lot of things he got really anxious about, expectation had turned out to be a lot worse than reality, he thought.
"Right, I have work to do, and so do you guys. I'll leave you to it," Alexa said, getting up.
"Thanks, babe," Clem said before looking at Jay. "Alright, where shall we start?"
"I think I'm going to stop going to therapy," was Jay's opener that night, having made a late call to Erin after his evening out with Clementine and Alexa. He was now in bed at their house.
"Hello to you too," Erin said, long since used to the unconventional ways he communicated. She never got annoyed by it. "Where has that come from? It seems to me that you've made good progress recently."
"I have. And I'm happy you've seen that. But I don't think it's because of the therapy. I've only been a couple of times and to be honest I just found it annoying. I don't like talking about myself. What progress I've made has come from me, and I want to keep making it myself. With your help obviously," he quickly added.
There was a moment of silence while Erin considered that. "Let me change this to a video call," she said eventually.
Jay accepted the request and Erin's face appeared on the screen. He could see that she was in bed too. Just seeing her made him happy.
"There you are," she said affectionately. "If you want to stop going because you think you've made your own progress, I'll support your decision. What I want you to do is keep communicating with me about how you're feeling about it all, because it might turn out that the therapy had started helping you, and going back might be a good idea."
That was fair, Jay had to admit. And he knew that she was speaking, as ever, from a place of love and support. "Okay. Thank you for being there for me," he said.
"Awww, honey," she said, clearly touched by that. "I'm always here for you, no matter what. And I know you are for me too."
"Yes, of course," he assured her.
"How did today go with Clem and Alexa?" she asked.
"It went well. At first I was wary of being around Alexa, but anticipation was worse than reality in the end. She's nice."
"That makes me really happy, Jay. Anticipation was worse than reality. I'll remember the way you put that. It makes a lot of sense. How did things go with Clem? You don't have to give me details on your ideas at this time of night, but did you make progress?"
"Yes, a lot. We've come up with some plans that I like a lot and I've made notes. What I think I'll do is write them up properly when I get home if I can use your computer?"
"Of course," she said, sounding impressed, which he loved to hear.
"Wish I was at home with you now," he blurted out next.
"I wish you were too. So much. You will be tomorrow night. Jay?"
"What?"
"I'm so proud of you, more than I can say. Never doubt that, okay?"
Jay took that in. His brain processed it and it meant a lot to him, to the pint where he felt somewhat emotional. However, no words would come for him to say in response. "Thank you," he managed eventually. "I'm doing my best."
"I know. And I also know that whatever you've come up with for Clem is going to be excellent. I can't wait to read it."
A/N: I chose not to show Jay's discussions with Clementine because that would inevitably spoil the ideas they've come with for her character, and it would be better to show it playing out on TV.
For the next chapter, we're going to jump forward a little in time. Jay's ideas will start to be implemented, and Maya the wildcat will be returning to WWE.
