In the last few moments of clarity that Soul relishes in before the storm of reality hits, he finds himself analyzing the carefully (and not so carefully) treaded steps of the budding friendship he and Maka had crafted, trying to figure out when 'this' all started. He doesn't know when it started. He can't particularly recall a specific moment where it hit him that the way he thought about Maka wasn't 'right'.

There was no one moment where he could pinpoint and explain that that was the moment he'd known he'd fallen deep over his head.

Soul, admittedly, never felt this way about someone. He never had the luxury to get himself swept away by someone. Truthfully, now wasn't the time to get swept away by someone either, but there was something about Maka that just had him coming back to this same desperate hand confused point.

He wishes he knew when it started- these confusing feelings that clouded his better judgment.

Maybe it started when they first met. Perhaps it was when he stepped into the glass room where Maka had waited for him, basking in the morning light like some divine angel sent from heaven to come and retrieve him. He knew from the moment they met how attractive she was. It was hard to shake such a memorable first impression. Time and time again he'd catch himself admiring the Princess- understanding just how fine of a person she was. There was no flaw in admiring one's beauty, right?

Or maybe it started when Maka frequently insisted they dine together for breakfast. It was such a simple gesture, but a gesture that had Soul's head whirling nevertheless. He'd claimed that Maka was a sweet person from that very moment (Ignoring the whole manipulation thing, of course.) The Princess had proven time and time again that she was, at the core, a kind person. God, who sat on their balcony with their guard in the middle of the night just to talk? What type of Princess would just leisurely suggest reading her guard a story?

Maybe it started when he realized how alike the two of them were. They seemed to be two sides of a story, meant to finish one another. They craved the same things out of life- came from similar backgrounds- and somehow came to meet one another on the same line in this lifetime. Was it some sort of coincidence? Was he always meant to meet Maka, to become her guard, to slip into these dangerous feelings?

Maybe it was in the way Maka subtly stepped into his personal space so much. Maybe it was their subtle shoulder bumps, or the way she had so delicately held his face in the palms of her hands, or the way their hands latched to one's like they were meant to be. It just felt right to him like Maka was supposed to be the one there, breaking every damn boundary he had.

Maka was breaking every boundary he had, actually.

She brought him to the forefront of his comfort zones cliff, enticing him with kind friendship and careless whispers, and just kindly pushed him over the edge. There was no one like Maka that made him feel the way she did- so safe, so cared for, and yet so scared and confused at the same time.

Maka was something else, and he loved it.

He loved the way she smiled. He practically ached at every smile that was directed towards him. It was such a stupid thing to swoon over- someones smile- but it brought him so much happiness. It was so refreshing to find beauty in such a cruel world.

He loved the way Maka's laugh sounded like the sweetest melodies to his ears. He loved the way he could wrap himself up in her words and feel safe.

Truthfully, it wasn't until that moment, as they crashed together in a heap onto Maka's bed, that every single piece clicked together.

He never realized that the feeling of attraction and desire was so deep.

His clarity was gone in a blink of an eye as Soul's hips slammed into the corner of the mattress, Maka's hips meeting his with the same force immediately after. With a heated gasp, Soul's upper body fell onto the soft mattress, his legs slipping down between Maka's. A beat later Maka's head was dropping onto his chest as a small 'oof' escaped the blonde.

They laid in a heap on the corner of Maka's bed, Soul half on half off the bed, his hands cradling Maka's wrist as the other lays on top of him with a knee pressed between his position has him internally groaning as he throws his head back onto the bed, his eyes meeting Maka's.

Neither of them say anything. They don't move, they don't even breathe. Soul wants to throw himself off the nearest cliff at that exact moment.

He's expecting Maka to scramble off of him and collect herself. He's expecting her to just stand up and brush the situation off like it was nothing- because it didn't have to be anything. It didn't need to mean anything. It really didn't need to mean anything.

They were just sparring. It was just a simple mishap. It was just a little trip.

Despite everything he was telling himself, he couldn't even find it himself to push the blonde off him, his limbs feeling like they had been stuffed with lead.

With his lips parted, Soul loosens his grip on Maka's wrists, his fingers trailing down the Princess's slender arms. It's a sensational feeling, the warmth of skin just under the pads of his fingertips. He wants to savor the touch, he wants to drown in it, but Maka pulls an arm away, pushing up closer to him. His breath hitches at the sudden friction that's dragged across his body.

He recoils, wishing for the sheets of Maka's bed to engulf him, but he knows they won't. Instead, Maka presses her forearm against Soul's throat. It's a subtle push, nothing more, but it's enough of a force that it has Soul gasping for air. Maka's eyes have not wavered from his face, and its too much.

It's all too much.

"I won," she whispered just inches from his face, dragging her tongue across her bottom lip right after.

This time, Soul finally does move. He presses his palms against Maka's shoulders and pushes her, hoping to put some space between the two of them, but the blonde pushes against his touch.

Too close. Too God damn close.

"Maka," He whispers thickly, unsure where he's really about to go with that sentence. Instead of finishing it, he pushes against the blonde once again, only to meet with resistance once more. Above him, Maka pulls her arm back slightly, letting her arm linger against his collar bone. She's holding a needy expression, her eyes trailing over his face greedily. He hates the heat that rises to his cheeks as he watches the blonde openly admire him.

"Tell me you yield." Maka mumbles, her eyes stopping to meet his. "I want you to admit I won."

"You're an idiot," he mutters back, his voice shaking. "You won, now get up."

Maka doesn't get up.

A string of curses leaves her lips as she raises a hand to Soul's jaw. With concentration, she drags her index finger from his jaw to the junction behind his right ear. Soul just helplessly follows her hands movements with his eyes, flinching when Maka's thumb makes contact with his cheekbone. His brain goes into haywire as the blonde traces his cheekbone gently, her fingers making their way to the side of his face.

Soul's body is on fire, his brain a jumbled mess.

"You have a really deep scar here," Maka said softly, her fingers coming to rest against the side of his cheek. "What happened?"

Soul cant help the way he stiffens. Bringing his arm down to his side he pressed his elbow into the mattress, forcing the two of them to sit up slightly, bringing their faces closer. "I got shot with an arrow," He replied in a hushed tone as if they were in a crowded room and only wanted Maka to hear him, "I was never able to treat it properly."

"Oh." With a comforting touch, the Princess traced the scar, her dull fingernails scraping lightly against the raised skin. "It suits you."

Souls giggle softened the room, cutting through the thick tension that had been budding between the two of them. "What? What is that supposed to mean?"

Maka shrugs, her fingers dipping back under his chin. "I don't know," she grumbles, her eyes locked on the scar. "I kind of expected you to have scars. They look good on you, like, in a badass type of way."

"You think scars look good on me?"

"What?" Maka's eyes flickered back up to his. Her eyes were soft in the moment, half-lidded as she looked up to Soul like he was the only person in existence. "Was I not supposed to admit that?"

Soul doesn't like where this is going. He doesn't like the feeling that is urging him to pull the blonde closer, doesn't like the way he suddenly feels needy for her touch. He doesn't like the way Maka is looking down on him, giving him a glimmer of hope that maybe the feeling of attraction was mutual.

These were dangerous roads to tread on.

He shouldnt entertain the thought of Maka actually liking him. He shouldn't even entertain the thought that he likes Maka.

At the end of the day, Maka was a Princess and he was her guard. Maka didn't have the 'luxury' to dream of any sort of romance that wasn't already signed up for her, let alone with her damn guard. She'd be destined for some Prince soon enough.

Soul was okay with that thought, he realized. Not totally on board with it, but okay with it.

He didn't have the capacity to care for someone like that. Not with the persona he had to live by. Not with the constant fear that wavered over his head like a swinging ax. Not with all the lies he had to constantly tell just to keep himself alive.

He wasn't cut out for loving someone, not in this lifetime.

He'd only ever end up hurting her, and Maka didn't deserve that.

Maka deserved to be loved to the fullest extent.

Willing himself to concentrate, he clears his throat, pushing his psalm against Maka's shoulders once more. "Okay, you won. I yield. Get up," He speaks firmly, praying to whatever god that is listening that Maka will actually listen; and she does.

Reluctantly, Maka rolled off of him and laid beside him with a quiet huff. Soul couldn't help but mourn the loss of her body heat the second it's gone, his hands curling at his sides as Maka's shoulder settled beside his.

He hated this.

This feeling he couldn't act upon.

"That was a cheap win," he mutters, eyes locked on the royal green canopy of Maka's bed. His eyes were stinking as he swallowed nervously, his throat feeling tight. He felt like crying. "I'm tempted to ask you for a rematch."

He's trying his hardest to put some sort of normalcy back into their conversation but he could tell that even Maka is tense now.

"I think it was a fair win," The blonde huffed back, her voice soft and distant. "Do you really want to go again?"

"No," He answers truthfully. He'd probably just disintegrate on the spot if they continued. He'd probably melt if Maka's hands were on him again.

Maka hummed. "That's what i thought."

The bed creaks between the two of them as Maka sits up, her head turning to Soul. With a hesitant gaze, Soul looked up out of the corner of his eyes, catching the Princess's eyes once again. She's looking down at him, her tousled hair sticking out in several places from her usually neat hairstyle, making her look like she was sporting a nasty case of bed hair.

The Princess's lips part slightly as she runs her tongue against her bottom lip. "It's days like these where you've got my head spinning."

"What?" Soul responds with confusion. He finds himself going to sit up too but a rough hand is sprawled against his shoulder blade, pushing him back against the bed with force. A startled gasp escapes him as his head slams against the mattress for the second time that day. Maka's hand lingers on his shoulder as he leans down, coming way too close for Soul's comfort.

"What?" She parrots back, rolling her eyes with a lazy smile. "What do you think I meant?"

Soul stares back at her as Maka retracts her arm. "I-I don't know," He stammered back in return. "Did I do something wrong?"

At that, Maka just laughs. She throws her head back, practically slipping off the edge of the mattress as she did. "No, you didn't," She answered through gasps, "I was just joking. I'm surprised you've given me this many chances to prove to you that I can handle my own and that you should take me outside of the kingdom."

This time, Soul does sit up without Maka pushing him back down. He watches as Maka rubs her watering eyes, a toothy grin flashed his way.

"What do you even want to see outside of the kingdom?" He suddenly asks, his knee bumping against Maka's as they both readjust themselves onto the bed. "It's just a bunch of forest for a while and then some small villages not too far."

At the question, Maka tips her head, propping herself up on her right arm. "Good question," She hums, turning her eyes upward. "I just want the satisfaction of being able to say I have been outside of the kingdom."

"Oh, yeah?" Soul practically purred.

"Uh- yeah?" Maka's cheeks grow a rosy red and Soul cant help but savor the image. "I don't know- I would like to go and visit one of the villages, maybe? Perhaps we could grab drinks at a tavern."

Soul gawks at her for a moment.

"Are you asking me to take you to a damn bar?"

"It was an idea," Maka insists, playfully slapping his knee. The contact has Soul's eyes flying down to the Princess's hand accusingly. "I haven't really ever thought about what I would do if I actually got out. I just want out, even if its for a few hours. Visiting another village would be nice. Watching the sunrise… Meeting new people for the fuck of it. It all sounds nice to me."

"Living a different life for one night?"

Maka's hand settles on his knee. "Something like that, I guess." She agrees, "It'd be nice to just go out for one night and pretend to be someone else. Live on the edge a little."

Soul wants to cackle, but he doesn't. Pretending to be someone you're not wasn't as fun as people made it out to be.

"I guess you're right," he settles on saying instead. "Well, you won. I like staying true to my word, Maka. When do you want to go out?"

"Do I need to know now?" Maka asks, her gaze soft on him. "I dont think im mentlaly prepared to think about it right now."

"No, you don't," Soul reassured her. "Whenever you're ready, just let me know when?"

"That sounds wonderful," Maka hesitated, pulling back her hand. "Soul?" Looking down at the Princess, he realizes Maka has turned away from him, her eyes settled on the balcony.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing is wrong," Maka reassured him, "I just- can i give you a hug?"

The question breaks all the composure Soul was able to muster over the past few minutes. With burning cheeks, he simply cleared his throat., "That's fine," He replied in the most monotone tone he could muster, hoping it didn't sound too forced.

Maka seemed to have missed the awkward detail because in a moment flat, the Princess was pulling him to her chest with needy hands. Bending down slightly to return the hug, his nose tickled against the Princess's ear. She let out a tiny gasp and squirmed for a moment before she tightened her grip around her guard.

"Thank you, for everything, Soul. I appreciate you more than you know."