Sakura sighed for the umpteenth time since afternoon as she closed her book. Even her favourite activity wasn't enough to get her out of her sour mood. Her first training session had been rather nerve wrecking. To think she had almost been sent back to the Academy... She had performed terribly at the test. The only thing she had been good at was feeding Naruto. When she saw Sasuke all beaten and bruised in the genjutsu and when he had been stuck underground, her mind had frozen with fear and disbelief. She couldn't believe herself that she had been so stupid to faint after seeing Sasuke underground instead of helping him or scream when she saw he needed medical attention. Now she had not only decreased her chance to become the next Uchiha Matriach but also proved to the Uchiha genin that she wasn't worth to be on the same team as him, even Naruto the deadlast had performed better than her. And though the genjutsu wasn't real, it had felt every bit of real at the moment. Guess she hadn't improved even after all this time.
She returned her book to the shelf and exited the library, the sky now different shades of orange and pink. Her mind was refusing to just let go of the matter and move on. 'We sucked, didn't we?' Inner pointed out. 'Thanks for stating the obvious,' she replied dryly as she took the long route towards her house. 'At least we passed the teamwork part,' her counterpart tried to cheer her up. She mumbled a response. 'Chin up, okay? It's not like it's the end of the world. We've barely begun this journey,' Inner spoke in a disinterested voice. She stopped walking, her anger starting to rise. "You want me to chin up? Chin up my ass! Chinning up isn't gonna get me anywhere. I failed the test! Sensei just passed me out of pity. Sasuke thinks I'm useless. And Naruto thinks I'm weak!" she shouted out loud in unbated anger. 'Well, acting like some pink haired banshee is going to get you anywhere! Instead of brooding, you should be working your hide off to improve!' her counterpart retorted with the same vigor. "Oh so now I'm a banshee-"
"What a drag."
Sakura spun around so fast she almost got a whiplash. Shikamaru was standing with his hands in his pockets lazily with an equally bored expression. "You didn't hear that, did you?" she asked with a horrified expression. "When Ino mentioned that you have a split personality disorder, I didn't believe her. But now I do," he replied as he sighed heavily. Sakura chuckled embarrassedly as her face burned. "What are you doing in the civilian district?" she asked, hoping to diverge the conversation away from her uncharacteristic outburst.
"Just walking around," he replied, not bothering to explain anymore. "Oh," she said. An awkward silence settled between them. "Do want to play shogi?" the brunette asked suddenly. Sakura raised her eyebrow at the invitation but all she got was a bored look in return. "Oh, um, sure. I hope your parents don't mind," she spoke uneasily. Going to his house seemed way off the chart but she really needed something to get her mind off her failed test. "I never said we were going to my house," he spoke with a ghost of a smirk dancing on his lips. "Oh." Lady Luck wasn't on her side today, she thought as her face burned with embarrassment. "C'mon."
Playing shogi with Shikamaru at Training Grounds 8 had been mind refreshing. At least she was able to get her mind off her failed test. That was until the Nara heir had beaten her for the fifth time that evening that it was beginning to grate on her nerves. 'Calm down Sakura, it's just a game,' she told herself as she forced herself to calm down, staring down at the board as if she was going to burn holes into it. "Are you angry?" he asked with a bored expression. "No," she was quick to reply, her brows furrowed as she sat across the boy. She received the flat look in return. "...yes," she muttered dejectedly. "Why?" he asked. "Because I'm failing this game, every time you're always beating me. I can't do anything right-" "Um, Sakura, I-"
"-even Naruto thinks so. Even Sasuke, heck even Kakashi-sensei. I just don't get it. I train everyday, I read books everyday. I know all there is to know about ninjustu, taijutsu, genjustu, kinjutsu, fuinjutsu, kenjutsu, shurikenjutsu. I know all the clans in Konoha, even the civilians. I know everything about all the former Hokages, or at least I think I do. I don't sleep day and night meditating. I do everything necessary to succeed but I'm still at point zero-"
"-Sakura-"
"- I mean, look at me. I'm a child of nobodies, I don't come from an important clan, I have no kekkei genkai. All I have is a large forehead and freakish pink hair. I'm the only civilian in class because I worked my butt off for it. I want to become the Uchiha Matriach but how can I do so when I'm so weak? I'm a liability to my team. I performed so terribly at the test today. Kakashi-sensei let me stay on the team out of pity. It's like everything I've learned vanished as soon as the test started. I couldn't break out of a simple genjutsu instead I let my feelings get the best of me-"
"-Haruno-"
"-Maybe I should just forget about it, about my dreams and all. Maybe I'm just wasting my time trying to be something I'm not. I can never become just like my idol if I start failing now. Hmmmm, I can always become a ninja teacher like Iruka-sensei, that's pretty good."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"GAAH, THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING SHANNARO!!!"
Shikamaru stared at her as she heaved up and down, trying to calm down her frenzied nerves. "Are you done yet?" he asked in a disinterested tone. "Sorry, I just needed to let that all out. I was just...surprised you know. I knew that I wasn't very good in combat but I never knew that I was this bad," she said as her lips trembled, her eyes starting to glisten with tears. Shikamaru's eyes widened as he took in the sight of the broken girl. He did not know how to deal with emotional people, let alone girls. Ino and his mother were troublesome enough. "Um...er, I'm sure it's not that bad. It's only just a test. It's just the beginning of the journey so don't be quick to give up. Whatever it is you want to achieve, becoming the Uchiha Matriach or whatever, I'm sure you'll achieve if you are truly determined and hard headed as Ino claims to be," he said quickly, hoping that his plan would work.
Sakura stared at the boy with wide, shocked eyes. The Nara heir raised his eyebrows. "Did you just make an effort to comfort me?" she asked incredulously. "Eh?" He watched as the tears began gushing down her cheeks. "That's so wonderful, thank you so much," she said tearfully. Shikamaru chuckled nervously. 'Is she PMSing or something because I did not prepare myself for this,' he thought with dry humour. His thought process however was cut short as the girl flung herself over to him, knocking over the shogi board and its pieces, wrapping him in a tight embrace. "Thank you so much, I never had someone who understands me and comforts me about my goals. Everyone seems to look down on me," she sobbed into his shoulder, her voice muffled by tears and her face pressing into his shoulder. Shikamaru remained still for awhile before he awkwardly began to tap the crying girl on her head. 'She's just using this as an excuse to cry herself out...troublesome woman,' he said to himself as he let out long tired sigh, choosing to ignore how his cheeks warmed at the gesture.
And I'm done with this chapter. Sorry for not updating for so long, my computer wasn't working, I've been lazy on all my stories but today I decided to update all my stories, starting with this story. Hope you like the chapter. I'll explain more on Sakura's behaviour in this chapter in the upcoming chapter. Thank you to all who are following and favourating this chapter. Pairing suggestions are still appreciated. Any grammatical errors are mine.
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Tozoonana
AfricanFire
