He didn't have a choice. The fight had gotten out of hand, too much blood had been spilled, and Arthur's voice had been pained when he'd told Merlin to run. It was clear that the bandits had the upper hand from the start, and as the knights had lain bloody and still on the ground, the young warlock had known he was out of options.

The leader of the men had pressed a sword to Arthur's throat, a streak of crimson trickling down and staining the collar of his tunic from where the steel had cut into his skin, and the man had been gloating. The great Pendragon, bested by mere bandits. Never mind the fact that there had been over a dozen of them that had ambushed a meager group of four. But Arthur had ignored the goading words, he'd just screamed for Merlin to go, to run and save himself. So Merlin had done what he did best; he'd ignored the prince's command.

With a trembling breath and a shaking hand, the warlock's eyes had shifted color and the bandits that had surrounded the prince were pushed away by the strongest wind he could create. Their shouts of surprise had been loud, though they hadn't compared to the shock Arthur displayed so openly on his face. Not that the boy had looked for long, he couldn't, not when he had more pressing matters at hand.

In minutes the young warlock had managed to take down most of the bandits, a sparse few running as far and as fast as they could with a few injuries that Merlin hoped would make them think twice before they attacked the prince again. His victory was short lived however, because as the boy's eyes returned to Arthur and he found that the prince was still kneeling where he'd been on the ground, Merlin knew that he'd reached a fork in the road. A single choice was about to determine the rest of his life, and he wasn't even the one who was able to make that decision.

"Are you alright?" The boy ventured slowly, the lingering silence hanging heavy and tense in the air as Arthur slowly rose, his movements stiff and hard. "I know that you—"

"Don't." The blond barked, lifting a hand to silence him as a stern look hardened his gaze. "Don't speak." Turning away, the prince's eyes swept over the carnage around them, blood and weapons and fallen men strewn across the forest floor as Merlin fought to swallow past the growing lump in his throat.

Seconds continued to tick by as the warlock began to grow anxious, his hands clasping together weakly. "Arthur, I know it's a bit of a shock, but—"

"A shock?" The prince repeated, spinning around and staring at the boy with a gaping expression. "Merlin, you have magic."

"I know, but—"

"How long have you been hiding this? Practicing this right under my nose?" He demanded, cutting in again as the boy fought the urge to shrink away from the roaring anger in his friend.

"I was born with it." He said quietly, waiting for the blond to erupt again. Instead, the prince merely stared, his mouth parted as if he were trying to speak but was unable to find the words. Jumping at the opportunity, Merlin took a step forward and drew in a large breath. "I was born with magic; I've had it all my life. But I don't use it for anything evil, I never have. I use it to help you, to help Camelot. I've only ever used it for good, Arthur, I swear to you."

"You lied to me." He spat the four words out like they were poison, his hands balling into fists beside him.

"This wasn't how I wanted you to find out."

"Magic is outlawed, Merlin! You shouldn't be using it at all!"

"It's who I am!" Merlin shouted back, his voice thick with emotion as a hand rose to his chest. "I know what you think of it, but I can't change what I am, how I was born. But Arthur, I've never once used it for anything, anything but good!"

The prince said nothing, hard blue eyes staring at his servant as Merlin dropped his hand and silently began to pray to anything that was listening. He needed him to understand, he needed him to know that he'd had no choice but to lie to him.

"What you did was wrong." Arthur finally spoke, the words quiet as his gaze fell to the blood soaked ground. "But I've done something worse."

Hope dared to spring to life inside the warlock as he leaned closer and caught his breath. "What?"

Looking back up, a blank mask fell over the prince as he uttered three words that drove through the boy like a sword through his chest. "I trusted you." Turning around, Arthur knelt to retrieve his weapon, gripping it tightly as Merlin stumbled forward, his body suddenly weighted with grief.

"A-Arthur!" He called, tears gathering in his eyes and making his vision swim as the blond began to move away from him, the hope he'd had shattering at his feet as he surged forward. "Arthur, please!"

"Stay away from me!" Whirling around, the point of the prince's blade swung towards him, hovering only inches from the boy's throat as wide, horrified eyes met those filled with hatred.

"Arthur, please." Merlin whispered, his body frozen as he tried not to look at the sword that didn't even tremble. "I need you to understand."

"I understand, Merlin, I understand that all this time you've been lying to me. Were you just trying to get close to the crown? Did you think that if you could weasel your way into the citadel that you'd have an easier time in destroying it? Destroying us?"

"No!" The boy's head shook fervently, trying desperately to blink away the moisture that was rapidly gathering in his eyes. "Arthur, I would never do anything like that, you know me!"

"I thought I did." He scoffed, his lips turning down in a scowl as he stared at the warlock in disgust. "Now you're nothing more than a stranger."

"Arthur, don't." Merlin begged, daring a half step closer as the tip of the sword moved to connect with his throat.

"Get back!" The prince yelled as the boy froze again, gritting his teeth against the steel that bit into his flesh as he lifted his hands in a surrendering manner.

"Arthur—"

"My father was right about magic! It's evil, and corrupts all those that fall prey to it, and you're just like all the others!" His words slammed into the warlock with so much force that Merlin took a step back, a strangled breath all he could get out.

"You don't mean that." He finally whispered. "I'd never do anything to hurt you, Arthur. Never."

"You already have." The prince declared, dropping his blade and staring at the boy with cold detachment. "I don't want to see you again, Merlin."

"After everything we've been through, after everything we've done, how could you think that I could do anything that was evil?" His voice cracked painfully with his words, a tear slipping down his face as he stared at the blond in desperation. "Do you really think so little of me that my having magic would make you hate me?"

Arthur remained silent at the question, his eyes studying the boy as the warlock struggled to keep his composure, hurt and anger and fear driving through him until the blond finally spoke. "Leave Camelot, Merlin. And never come back."

"What?" The word was barely audible, catching in his throat as he stared in disbelief at the prince.

"I'm banishing you, and you're never to cross the borders into Camelot again."

"Camelot is my home, Arthur! You can't just kick me out of my home!"

"Can't I?" Arthur roared, and the amount of rage on his face was more than the warlock had ever seen before. "You're lucky that I don't take you back to my father and let him execute you like the lying sorcerer that you are!" Merlin couldn't move, he could hardly even breathe as he stood rooted in place.

"Consider this the last civil act I grant you in repayment for saving my life." Arthur continued, blue eyes void of all emotion as they stared at the warlock. "But I swear to you Merlin, if you ever come back here, if I ever see you again, I will take you to the executioner myself." Sheathing his sword, the prince turned and stalked through the trees, leaving the boy to stare helplessly at his back as he went.

How could he say those things? How could he treat him like that? He had known how Arthur felt about magic, but a piece of him had thought their friendship was enough to at least warrant a civil conversation about it. Arthur was abrasive and cold at times, but they were friends, weren't they? They couldn't end things like this, they just couldn't.

"Arthur." He called out, his voice cracking again as he tried to force himself louder. "Arthur, please!" Despite his cries the man never stopped, never turned back, and as the blond disappeared into the forest Merlin felt his world collapsing as he sunk to his knees, the tears he'd been holding back finally spilling down his face. "Please." He choked out, a sob making his shoulders lurch as his head fell.

They'd been standing at a fork in the road and Arthur had made his decision. He'd chosen to leave the warlock behind, to throw him away as if he were nothing. He'd failed his destiny. How could he protect Arthur now? How could he return magic to the realm when the prince wanted no part of him? But it was worse than that. In a matter of seconds he'd lost everything that was important to him. Gaius, his home, his best friend. He'd lost it all.


He didn't have a choice. He hadn't planned, or wanted, to spend his day in such a manner, but his father hadn't left any room for argument. Heaving a quiet sigh and twirling a stick between his fingers, Arthur slumped forward and frowned into the flames of the campfire. He'd been trying to sleep all evening but there was just too much on his mind.

After Morgana's kidnapping, the king had received word of druids hiding out in various parts of the forest, and Uther had sent his son straight away to rid their land of the remaining few that had gotten away. He'd spent all day tracking them, along with a few of his knights, and Merlin of course. They'd kept on their trail, but the druids managed to evade them each time they drew close, and the men were finally forced to make camp for the night when it grew too dark for them to see.

None of the men had thought twice about the king's order, after all, he'd been in quite a state over what had happened to his ward. But Arthur, well, he felt conflicted. They'd kidnapped Morgana, even inflicted pain upon her, but he felt as though there were more to the story that she hadn't told them. Of course he wanted them to pay for what they'd done to her, but he'd seen their camp, filled with families and children.

If a druid were going to kidnap someone of royalty, someone they knew would send the kingdom into an uproar in a search for them, would they endanger the lives of their children by bringing them to the same camp? Not to mention that until now, the druids had not made a move on Camelot, avoiding any and all contact whenever possible. But when he'd tried to question her, Morgana had only said that she could not remember due to the pain and the trauma from what she'd been through.

Arthur didn't doubt her claims, he'd seen with his own eyes as they'd tried to drag her off, but he still wondered if in the midst of everything he'd managed to lose a few pieces of the puzzle along the way. Considering those lines of thought would only get him into trouble though, the prince had kept his qualms to himself, not even indulging his servant with the pressing questions weighing on him.

He couldn't allow any doubts he had to reach the knights, not when he was meant to be their leader, when it was his job as the crown prince to remain firm in the beliefs of his father. And if that meant chasing the druids down one by one then he would do so without hesitation. At least, not out loud.

Stretching out his arm, Arthur poked a fallen log back into the fire with his stick and let his eyes wander over their small camp, his gaze resting on his servant who had set up his bedroll at the base of one of the trees. The boy was curled in on himself, yet he seemed to move restlessly where he lay, a heaving breath escaping him as he turned to his other side.

The druids weren't the only thing weighing on the man's mind that evening. Neither of them had spoken of the boy's affections towards Morgana since the night she'd been brought back, but he was painfully aware that they were still there. He'd not enjoyed saying what he had, especially knowing that much of it had been a lie, but he could not risk Merlin falling any further onto Uther's bad side. Yet the more he thought about it, the more he felt like a hypocrite.

He'd gotten onto the servant for vying for the attention of someone out of his reach when Arthur himself hadn't been able to stop thinking about Guinevere at every second of the day. She was just so, different. Refreshingly so. The way she smiled, the way she said his name, even the way she spoke to him that was like no one else and then would try and backtrack in an attempt to remain respectful.

When he'd kissed her, it had been like nothing he'd felt before, and he often let himself get lost in the dream of what that might be like, time spent in her presence. And then reality sunk in, and everything became exactly what it was, a dream.

Dropping his head with a sigh, Arthur slumped against his hand and poked again at the edge of the fire, letting himself sink into his gloom before the sound of movement caught his attention. Glancing up, he spotted Merlin once more twisting around on his pallet, a soft groan drifting towards him as he frowned towards the boy.

Uther would have both of their heads if either one of them acted upon the feelings they had for the girls that had caught their attention. Not that the servant would let that stop him, but at the very least the prince was determined to do what he could to keep him away. Did Merlin feel the same about Morgana that he felt about Gwen? He knew how fond the girl had become of his servant, the two having steadily grown closer since his arrival in the kingdom, but it had seemed that just in the few days since her abduction the two had grown closer still.

Merlin often disappeared for long stretches of time only for the prince to later find him sneaking from the girl's chambers under the guise of delivering potions for Gaius. Had it only happened once or twice, the royal would have been inclined to believe him, but the smile the boy continuously failed to hide was a clear indicator of the falsity to his claims. That was part of the reason he'd been so adamant for the servant to accompany him. Some time away from the citadel, and Morgana, would do him some good.

Pushing the stick he held further into the flames, Arthur looked to the boy once more as he continued to squirm, quiet mumbling drawing out an annoying amount of concern within the royal as he leaned forward where he sat. Shadows caused by the fire moved in a haunting manner over the boy's tense features, and the prince barely had time to wonder what had happened before Merlin shot up from the ground.

Shocked by the sudden movement, Arthur watched as the boy gulped in several large breaths while his fingers dug almost painfully into the dirt beside him. "Merlin?" He called out, keeping his voice low in an effort to not wake the knights as the boy's entire body went rigid, a grimace crossing his face as he dropped his head and drew in a sharp breath. "What's the matter with you?"

Despite his questioning no sound left the boy, his body stiff and still as if afraid to move as Arthur fought the urge to sigh. Why did he always try to keep things to himself? Didn't he know by now that never worked? "What, did you have a nightmare?" He questioned in a teasing tone only to watch as the servant's body tensed and drew in closer as Arthur stared. "Seriously? How old are you?" He gaped, the urge to laugh fading as he noted the shudder that ran through the boy's slight frame.

Closing his mouth and shoving the stick fully into the fire, Arthur let out a slow breath. "What was it about?" He asked quietly, looking up at the boy as he shook his head back and forth, dark hair swinging across his forehead.

"Nothing." Merlin croaked, and it was an answer that the prince couldn't help but roll his eyes at. His servant was the worst liar on the best occasion, but there was no way anyone would ever believe such a pathetic attempt.

"Obviously it wasn't nothing, you're sitting there shaking." The blond pointed out with a scoff, staring hard at the boy who had yet to meet his eye. "Tell me." He urged, softening his voice as Merlin hesitantly lifted his head and caught the prince's pressing gaze.

Surprise struck Arthur at the watery eyes that looked back at him, the fire illuminating the tracks along his cheeks from where he must have been crying in his sleep. "You'll just think its's stupid." He mumbled, drawing his legs up towards his chest while brushing the dirt from his fingertips.

"Merlin."

"It was just.." Staring into the fire, the boy wore a haunted expression as his arms tightened around his knees. "It was about someone that I care about. They learned something about.. about me, and they misunderstood." Arthur could barely hear him over the fire, but if the boy noticed he didn't care, obviously already lost in the dream that had shaken him so badly. "They reacted poorly to what they learned and.. and I-I.." Sucking in a breath, Merlin's head shook again. "I lost them." The final words were barely a whisper as a hand scrubbed quickly at his face, the prince glancing away while pretending not to hear the quiet sniffle that left the other.

"What did they discover?" He asked, speaking up once it was clear the boy was finished. All that met his question though was silence, the servant tucking himself in tighter as the prince settled his chin into his hand. "Must have been your incredible laziness. Or perhaps your inexplicable talent for tripping over your own feet all the time." He laughed, though the sound felt hollow as he tried, and failed, to rile a smile from him.

Glancing away as his mind raced, Arthur was once again struck with the strong sense of how different the two of them were. He'd never met someone who could get so worked up over losing a friend, let alone one from a dream. He'd watched friends move to other kingdoms and he'd lost men in battle, but all of that was just a part of life. Yet here was this boy, this strange servant who cared too much and was so painfully loyal to everyone around him that just a dream could work him up in such a manner.

In a way, Arthur was almost jealous. He'd never been close enough with someone or felt so strongly about them that the idea of no longer having them around would inflict such misery. He had friends of course, but Merlin, he had real friends.

Suddenly uncomfortable by the path his thoughts had taken him down, Arthur shifted where he sat and looked back to the boy. "So, that's what upset you then?" He asked, his tone sobering. "Losing a friend?"

Merlin's head turned away while his fingers picked at the sleeve of his tunic. "I told you that you'd think it was stupid."

"Not stupid," Arthur stated, catching the other's surprised stare. "Perhaps a bit childish, though."

Sinking his head into his arms, the servant stared at the flames in silence as the prince leaned against his knees. The boy was still visibly upset, and for some reason, the prince couldn't make himself ignore it. There was just something that didn't sit right with him whenever the other wasn't his usual exuberant self, and it annoyed the royal to no end.

"They weren't your friend." He spoke after several seconds had passed in heavy silence. "If someone learns something about you, something that's a part of who you are, and they choose to hold it against you for whatever reason, to just throw you aside because of something that you have no control over, then they were never really your friend to begin with."

As Merlin's lips pressed tightly together and his fingers curled into tense fists, Arthur got the strange sense that he'd somehow made it worse. He'd never been good at such things, but he'd come too far now, so with a soft curse, the prince uttered one final thing. "And that's their loss, Merlin."

The words were the quietest he'd ever spoken, so quiet in fact that he wasn't even sure that the boy had heard him, and a piece of him hoped he hadn't. But when he dared to look up, he found wide blue eyes staring back at him that caused the prince to turn away just as quickly. He felt a rush of embarrassment wash over him at the statement, but the fear and the hurt had fallen from his servant's face, and he forced himself to focus on that as he cleared his throat.

"Personally, I'm surprised to hear that you even have friends." Arthur continued, the flippant comment far easier to get out as he slid off the log he'd been perched on and sat on the ground, leaning back to get more comfortable. "Who was it about anyway?"

Looking across the fire, Merlin stared back at the prince with a small frown before he was relaxing, and his shoulders were lifting in a shrug. "I'm not really sure." He finally answered, leaning back on his hands as he stared hard at the prince. "I didn't recognize them."

Scoffing, Arthur folded his arms across his chest and tilted his head back until his eyes found a piece of the night sky through the branches of the trees above. It was so typical of the boy for him to be upset about something that wasn't even real.

"Why are you awake?" Merlin questioned after a few moments, drawing the blond's attention back to the camp as the man gave a half shrug of his own.

"Couldn't sleep."

"Something on your mind?" The servant pressed, leaning forward in a show of interest that had the royal rolling his eyes again.

"I always have something on my mind. Unlike you, I have real things that require my attention." At Merlin's persistent stare, Arthur huffed out a heavy breath. "I've been thinking about the druids. While we've had to make camp, there's no doubt that they've continued to put distance between us and them." Not that he minded, although it did just prolong the inevitable.

"And if we cannot find them?"

"We keep searching until we do. My father has commanded their death." Merlin's eyes fell to the fire at that, and even Arthur couldn't deny the poor taste that lingered in his mouth at the words. "Though I suppose if we cannot find more than a weak trail at the end of three days, we'll have no choice but to return for lack of supplies." He added a moment later.

"Perhaps we'll find them tomorrow then." The boy offered, though it sounded far from hopeful as he settled back onto his bedroll. Neither of them spoke another word, but Arthur knew that Merlin was as awake as he.

Settling back and letting his eyes wander to the fire, he watched the flames dance while one of the logs split apart, the two halves siding to either side as a weight settled over him. He'd told Merlin that Morgana couldn't be his friend, but the fact was that he couldn't be either, no matter how easy it was to pretend at times. In the end, he faced the same problem with Merlin that he did with Gwen. A friendship with one, a relationship with the other, it didn't matter how much he wished for things to change, pursuing either was an act that was just too far out of reach.


A/N

I MISSED MY BOYS SO MUCH.

Guess who is back! Ahhh I'm so happy to be writing these lovable idiots again! I've literally been thinking about them nonstop and have come up with several more stories that I'm really eager to play out! I've never had this much muse for anything in my life and it's exciting.

I want to thank everyone SO MUCH for their support in my endeavor! Your encouragement and patience has meant the world to me. Currently my book is still in the process of being completed (family issues and my own procrastination got in the way and made me push the date back lol WHOOPS) but I will be finishing it in the next few weeks! In the meantime, I'll keep you guys posted on its progress when I get the time to update!

I hope you guys enjoyed, and I cannot wait to get back into this story. Leave me a comment if you'd like, and thanks so much again for your patience!