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Chapter 9: Turnabout Samurai Part 4

October 19, 9:42 AM

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

Will: ... ... Umm... Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: Yes?

Will: Why do you look so... unhappy?

Phoenix: O-oh! Oh, nothing! Eh heh heh.

"It's not like I'm going in with not much evidence and you're probably going to jail." Jaune said.

Phoenix: Really, it's nothing. Right, Mia? (Uh oh. She looks even unhappier...)

Mia: Phoenix. Your client is now practically a dead man walking... Perhaps that's why I feel particularly close to him.

"Don't make jokes like that." Pyrrha said.

Phoenix: This is no time for dead-people jokes, please.

Mia: You know we're going into this trial utterly defenseless. Yet, if Mr. Powers is truly innocent... We should be able to find something overlooked in the evidence to prove it.

Phoenix: Something "overlooked"...?

"It doesn't seem like it." Weiss said.

'I must've overlooked something! Wait, no, it was the game, not me, I would've noticed it.' Blake thought.

Mia: We have to find something, Phoenix, today. It's that, or lose the trial.

Phoenix: (This isn't going to be easy.)

October 19, 10:00 AM

District Court

Courtroom No. 4

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: The court is now in session for the trial of Mr. Will Powers.

"And boy, let me tell you what I did last night." Nora said.

"We don't want to hear." Jaune said.

"We're not interested." Ren said.

"What?! But it's very interesting! I had the best time of my life!" Nora said.

"No." Jaune said.

"Please don't." Ren said.

"We don't want to hear your sexual experience with a plate of pancakes." Yang said. Some of them started laughing.

"Why do you have to make everything sexual?!" Ruby said.

"Cause it's funny."

"How do you have a sexual experience with a plate of pancakes?!" Weiss said.

"You just have sex with it. Just shove it between them."

"Stop."

"Just the feeling of maple syrup pouring on my old, wrinkly p-" Nora said.

"STOP!"

'I miss my innocence...' Ruby thought.

"Can we return to the game, please? The trial just started." Blake said.

Edgeworth: The prosecution is ready, Your Honor.

Phoenix: The defense is ready, Your Honor.

Judge: Very well. Mr. Edgeworth, your opening statement, please.

Edgeworth: An unexpected fact has come to the attention of the court. Yesterday, we learned that there were other people present at the studios! Today, I would like to show evidence proving they had nothing to do with the murder.

Judge: Very well. You may call your first witness, Mr. Edgeworth.

Phoenix: (I wonder if that producer is going to come out...)

"I doubt it."

Edgeworth: The prosecution calls Mr. Sal Manella to the stand.

Phoenix: (... or that director.)

(The witness is on the stand.)

Edgeworth: Will the witness state his name and profession?

Manella: ... How r00d can j00 get! J00 don't know ME!? I'm the director! I make the Steel Samurai, n00b! ROFL!

Edgeworth: (crosses his hands) ...

Manella: S... Sal Manella. I'm a director. Television.

"I'm a fish now for some reason." Yang said.

Judge: Were you at Global Studios on the day of the murder?

Manella: Y-yes, Your Honor.

Judge: Hmm... Very well. Please testify to the court about the events of that day.

Mia: Phoenix. Let's start by picking this testimony apart. If Powers is innocent, you know what that means. Someone in the trailer on that day did it!

Phoenix: R-right. (She doesn't waste any time putting on the pressure!)

Witness Testimony

- The Day of the Murder -

Manella: I was at the studios from around 9:00 that morning.

During the morning, I was doing... umm... an action scene run-through.

It took a lot more time than I thought it would.

I hear that everyone else ate lunch in the Employee Area...

But I had a meeting in the Studio Two trailer, so I ended up skipping lunch.

"Then whose plates where outside the studio?" Yang said.

We were in the meeting until around 4:00...

During the meeting, well, I'm pretty sure no one left their chairs.

Manella: That's about it.

Judge: Hmm... The time of Mr. Hammer's death was 2:30 PM. And according to your testimony, you were in a meeting at that time. Mr. Wright, you may begin your cross-examination.

Phoenix: Yes, Your Honor.

Cross Examination

- The Day of the Murder -

"I already know what to press, but I want to see if I can get more out of him." Blake said.

(Presses statement 2)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! In the Employee Area?

Manella: That's right. It was a fight scene between the Steel Samurai and the Evil Magistrate.

Phoenix: Was anyone else at the run-through?

Manella: Oh, yeah. That security lady was sitting there watching the whole thing. LOL. She was cheering on Hammer, if you can believe it.

Phoenix: (She certainly has the lungs for it...) Anyone else?

Manella: Nope, just us four.

(Presses statement 3)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! Why did it go on so long?

Manella: Um, I'm pretty sure j00've already heard about this... But WP twisted his ankle during the run through, see...

Phoenix: (Oh, right, thus the limp.)

Manella: Which of course led to me missing my lunch. ROFS!

"ROFS?" Weiss said.

Phoenix: (ROFS? Rolling on the Floor... Starving?)

"I hate internet talk." Blake said.

"Pretty cringe." Yang said.

(Presses statement 5)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! So, in the end, you didn't get to eat?

Manella: Yeah. No steak, at least! Can j00 believe it?

"Yeah, how tragic." Blake said.

Phoenix: That must have been tough.

Mia: Phoenix.

Phoenix: Yeah?

Mia: Doesn't something about that seem odd to you?

[Not at all]

[It's a little vague]

[It's contradictory]

"Absolutely "

(Picks It's contradictory)

Phoenix: Yeah, it does seem odd, now that you mention it. Mr. Manella!

Manella: H-hmm? W-what do j00 mean? *sweats*

Phoenix: When I went to that trailer, I saw something on the table. There were two plates on the table-the same kind of plates as in the Employee Area. (Points) Who ate lunch there?

Manella: M-mmpf! No, er, ah, um, eh heh. Good call! *sweats* I, er, I was embarrassed so I didn't mention it... But I did eat, after all.

"Embarrassed? You speak in internet!" Weiss said.

Phoenix: A t-bone steak, you mean?

Manella: Yeah, well, I mean the assistant went through all that trouble... I brought it to the trailer thinking I could eat it later.

Phoenix: (Clearly a man who likes to eat. I'd suspected as much...) So, when exactly did you eat it?

Manella: We took one break during that meeting. I, er, wolfed it down then. *drool*

Phoenix: (A mental image I will carry with me to my grave...)

Some of them started laughing.

Phoenix: (Wait a second...! If they took a break in that meeting, that contradicts his testimony! I'll press on that one a bit more...)

(Presses statement 7)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! You didn't take a single break?

Manella: Er... well... Y-yeah! Not a one! *sweats*

Phoenix: (Hmm... what's he sweating so much about, I wonder? If only I had an idea... Wait a second... Maybe I do have an idea!)

[Press harder]

[Leave him be]

"I'll do what I always do and press!" Jaune said.

"That's really the only thing we do." Yang said.

(Picks Press harder)

Phoenix: (slams) Wait a second! Mr. Manella, you've just contradicted yourself! (Points) Didn't you just tell the court that you ate that t-bone steak during a break?

Manella: Oops! ROFL!

"I don't understand, why ROFL? He's in trouble." Ruby said.

"You try to understand him now?" Weiss said.

Phoenix: Well?

Manella: Umm...

Judge: Mr. Manella, what's this all about?

"What's this about a steak? And why isn't one in front me right now?!" Nora saud.

Manella: W-well, yeah, I guess we did take a little break.

Mia: Phoenix! Great job! If they took a break, one of them could have gone to the studio during that time!

Phoenix: Your Honor! I call on the witness to testify to the court about this break!

Judge: Very well. Mr. Manella, your testimony, please.

Manella: Urk!

Edgeworth: Heh heh heh...

"Of course you would laugh, you smug asshole." Blake said.

Phoenix: (Uh oh. Edgeworth is laughing...)

Witness Testimony

- The Break -

Manella: Yeah, FWIW, we took a break... ROFL!

But it was only 15 minutes! 15! That's only 13 in Base 12!

Not enough time for someone to, say, commit murder in Studio One! LOL!

That's only just enough time to eat a t-bone steak, if you ask me! *steams*

"I can't see a contradiction."

"So just press." Yang said.

Judge: Hmm... I don't think it would even be enough time for that, but that's just me. Very well. You may begin the cross-examination.

Cross Examination

- The Break -

(Presses statement 1)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! What time exactly did you take this break?

Manella: Hmm... I'd say it was from around 2:30 or so untl 2:45.

Phoenix: (2:30! That's the time of death! So he could have gone to Studio One, killed Hammer, and come back... I guess it's possible, time-wise...)

"Really? Because that would mean that within the minute, he went to the studio and killed him." Ren said.

"What? He teleported there?" Weiss said.

"Or Hammer died in Studio Two." Blake said.

"But you didn't prove that yet." Pyrrha said.

"Oh, I will."

Edgeworth: ...

(Presses statement 2)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! What were you doing for those 15 minutes?

Manella: Eating my t-bone steak! What else!?

Phoenix: There were two plates on the trailer table...?

Manella: Oh, right. The other one was Diva's... sorry, Dee Vasquez's plate.

Phoenix: (Dee Vasquez... the producer.)

Edgeworth: To eat a t-bone steak in 15 minutes... that's quite a feat.

"She must be eating like a pig, like you." Yang said, making everyone laugh.

"To not leave the bone, yeah, she must be." Blake said.

(Presses statement 3)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! Why is that?

Edgeworth: OBJECTION! Haven't we had enough of this pointless line of questioning? Your Honor! The testimony to this point has made one certain fact painfully clear: The people in the trailer had nothing to do with this murder! (Points) It was impossible for any of them to go to Studio One!

Phoenix: What!?

Edgeworth: Something wrong, Mr. Wright? (Points) Surely you aren't suggesting one of the people in the trailer went to Studio One!

Judge: Hmm... Well, Mr. Wright?

Mia: Phoenix, this is critical! Think about it before you give your answer!

"I'm waiting for an answer here, Mr Wright!" Nora said.

"Let me think first!" Jaune said.

Judge: Do you claim someone from the trailer went to Studio One?

[I claim it, and claim it loud]

[No, it's impossible]

"What will you pick now?" Ruby said.

"If I say I claim someone, Edgeworth will counter it. Besides, It would go against my theory if I did."

"But what if you say no? It might end the the trial." Pyrrha said.

"They wouldn't end it after only one witness." Jaune said.

"Hmm..." Blake said.

(Picks No, it's impossible)

"You forgot to save." Yang said.

"It's fine. I got this."

Phoenix: (I don't want to write off so many possible suspects... But I can't keep claiming the impossible, either...) I agree that it was impossible for anyone in the trailer to go to the studio in that time.

Edgeworth: Ha hah! (Shrugs and shakes his head) I thought you might be thoughtlessly treading on thin ice again! But I see you had at least an inkling of the truth.

Judge: What do you mean, Mr. Edgeworth?

Edgeworth: It's quite simple... True, the break in the trailer meeting came right at the time of death... However! The path from there to the scene of the crime was blocked! (Slams) The fallen Mrs. Monkey head barred the way!

"I thought it was Mr Monkey." Ruby said.

Edgeworth: At around 2:15, a strong gust of wind knocked off the studio mascot's head. Ergo! When the people in the trailer took a break at 2:30, the way to the studio was blocked. Blocked... by Mrs. Monkey's severed head!

Phoenix: ... (It's actually "Mr. Monkey," but Edgeworth has a point... And somehow, I feel no desire to correct him.)

"Yeah, bro, it's Mr Monkey. Don't you know?" Yang said.

"You need to keep up with the lore, dude." Jaune said.

"The lore?" Pyrrha said.

"Yeah. Everything has a lore."

"It's a meme." Yang said.

"What would our lore be?" Nora said.

"Our lives?" Ren said.

Edgeworth: I believe we have seen enough evidence. (Bows) I would like to relieve Mr. Manella from the stand.

Phoenix: (Wh-what? It's over?)

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Very well. The court's opinion on this case is as follows: We have found that there were several other people in Studio 2 on the day of the murder. However, it is also clear that none of these people could have gone to Studio One. They therefore have no relation to this case. Furthermore, with regards to the photo of the Steel Samurai... Given the size of the costume, no one other than Mr. Powers could have worn it that day. All that is lacking is decisive evidence that he is the one who did it. If we had that, I'm afraid I would have to find Mr. Powers guilty.

Edgeworth: Your Honor. The prosecution is pleased to announce that we indeed have decisive evidence: a witness.

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Who is this witness, Mr. Edgeworth?

Edgeworth: My witness saw the very moment when the Steel Samurai skewered the victim!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Order! I will have order!

"Holy crap, you guys are louder than usual." Nora said.

Judge: I see. The court will take a 10 minute recess, after which we will hear your witness. Court is adjourned for recess!

(The judge pounds his gavel.)

"Monkey bars!"

October 19, 11:04 AM

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

Mia: ...

"I wish I was at the monkey bars right now." Yang said. Everyone started laughing.

"I can't imagine her doing that." Blake said.

"She turns back to Maya."

"Everyone's welcome!" Nora said.

"Yay, monkey bars! Come on, Nick!" Ruby said.

"Wait for me!" Jaune said.

"Can I come too?" Yang said.

"Sure, Gumshoe." Ruby said.

"You too, Edgeworth, join us!" Nora said.

"Sure, why not." Ren said.

"Weeeee." Yang said.

"... Are you done?" Weiss said.

"Sorry for having fun."

Phoenix: What do we do now, Mia? If everyone in that trailer has an alibi...

Mia: ... I'm sorry, Phoenix. I guess I was wrong.

Phoenix: M-Mia! Don't tell me you're giving up! If you give up, what hope do I have...?

"Why did I even call you for?" Jaune said.

"You're as useless as Maya."

"Maya is not useless!" Ruby said.

"Without channelling, she is."

"I... that's... I can't think of anything."

Mia: ... Don't get me wrong. I've never given up on a trial before, not while there was a chance. Only one thing became clear in your cross-examination. The people in the trailer could not have gone to Studio One. I thought there was more to it than that... But I was wrong. That's all there is.

Will: Umm... Er... What's going to happen to me? It kinda seems like everyone in that courtroom thinks I did it... They think I'm a murderer!

Mia: Don't worry, Mr. Powers. If you are innocent, we will prove it. I guarantee it. Leave it to us, and... be yourself. Be strong. You are the Steel Samurai, hero to children everywhere, after all.

Will: I... You... Thanks. *sniff*

"He said sniff, not snort." Blake said.

"I'm trying to be funny here." Yang said.

"How about don't?" Weiss said.

Mia: Okay, Phoenix. This one's for the kids! Let's do it!

October 19, 11:15 AM

District Court

Courtroom No. 4

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Court is back in session for the trial of Mr. Will Powers.

Edgeworth: The pHoweverrosecution has a concern. As our witness is a grade schooler of tender years, and this is a murder case... We worry that the defense might cause unnecessary trauma with his cruel questioning!

Phoenix: (Nice to see Edgeworth taking the moral high ground...)

Edgeworth: , we have no choice. The prosecution calls Cody Hackins to the stand.

(The witness gets on the stand, and... only half of his head is visible.)

Some of them started laughing.

Edgeworth: Your Honor. Perhaps you could arrange a box for him to stand on?

Judge: Oh, r-right. Guard, please bring him a box. One of those donut crates should do.

(Now the witness is visible.)

"I admit, that was clever." Blake said.

Edgeworth: Will the witness state his name and grade in school.

Cody: ...

Edgeworth: (slams) Witness!

Cody: What!? Just 'cause you're all grown-up don't mean you can push me around!

Edgeworth: Mrph...

"Not even Edgeworth is a match for this kid." Yang said.

Mia: Cody? Answer his question, okay?

Cody: H-hey, it's you! The nice lady!

"With the big boobs!"

Cody: I'm Cody Hackins. I'm in 2nd grade!

Phoenix: (I get the feeling this is going to be a long, long day...)

Judge: Mr. Edgeworth. Please remember that you're speaking to a child. Try to be gentle.

Edgeworth: M-mrrrrph!

"How about HE tries to be more polite?" Ren said.

Edgeworth: Witness! Er, I mean, Cody.

Phoenix: (He's having trouble with this "gentle" thing.)

Edgeworth: You were present, er, you were at Global Studios on the day of the, er, incident?

"He's having a hard time!" Pyrrha said while laughing a little.

Cody: You got a problem with that!?

Edgeworth: Please tell us what you saw that day.

Cody: What, pops? You want me to tell you and gramps with the beard over there?

"I'm 24!" Yang said.

Edgeworth: Just.. Mr. Edgeworth will be fine.

Judge: I prefer "bearded gentleman" myself.

Phoenix: (A very long day...)

"Actually, no. Call me god." Nora said.

"God?" Ren said.

Judge: Incidentally, photographic equipment is strictly forbidden in this courtroom.

Edgeworth: M-mpht! M-my apologies, Your Honor. He said he wouldn't testify if he couldn't bring it... I'd like special permission, if that's possible.

"Isn't that also evidence? He could've taken a photo." Ruby said.

Phoenix: Wait, so you're saying you had to bargain terms with a kid... and you LOST?

"You try it!" Ren said.

"I did! And I won!" Blake said.

Cody: Hey! I just got this new camera! Don't really know how to use it all that good yet! But I bring it with me wherever I go!

Mia: Phoenix. I wonder if he had that camera on the day of the murder... You'd better make a note of it in the Court Record.

(Cody's Camera added to the Court Record.)

[Cody's Camera: A new digital camera. Cody always carries it, though he's still learning how to use it.]

Judge: Very well, Cody. Please testify to the court about what you saw the day of the incident.

Witness Testimony

- Witness's Account -

Cody: I wanted to see a Steel Samurai rehearsal, just once.

I found a map on the Internet, and went to the studios that day.

I went through the woods off the path, so that old lady wouldn't catch me.

I was going for the studio.

I got kinda lost on the way, though. For about 30 minutes.

When I came out by the studio, there was the Steel Samurai!

It totally rocked! Right before my eyes, out came the bad guy!

Of course, the Steel Samurai took him down! Pow!

If I had my camera with me, that woulda been the time for a shot, I tell you.

"But you... You just said a minute ago that you always bring it with you!" Weiss said.

"This will be easy."

Cody: Anyway, I couldn't get into the studio, so I went home.

Judge: Hmm... Very well. The defense may begin its cross-examination. And, be gentle. Remember you're talking to a child.

Cody: ...

Phoenix: (This kid is tougher than most adults we see in here, honestly...)

Cross Examination

- Witness's Account -

"Let's press before I present the camera."

(Presses statement 5)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! You got lost in the woods?

Cody: Yeah. I couldn't figure out which way I was walking. Man, was I relieved when I saw the blue studio doors. But guess what happened next!

(Presses statement 6)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! The Steel Samurai?

Cody: Yeah, he was standing by the studio gate. It looked like he was thinking about something before going in. Then he opened up the gate and went inside.

Phoenix: I see. What then?

(Presses statement 7)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! What sort of "bad guy" was it?

Cody: A guy. A person. Kinda tall. Skinny.

Phoenix: Are you sure it was a guy?

Cody: ... I dunno. He was kinda far away.

Phoenix: (Huh, he's being awfully vague...)

Mia: ...

"That's strange." Ruby said.

"What is?" Blake said.

"He's a fan of the Steel Samurai. He should know how the main villain looks."

"You're right. He would've said the Evil Magistrate." Yang said.

"Or he wasn't wearing the costume by the time he got killed and the killer put the costume on him." Weiss said.

"Didn't Cody say someone tall and skinny? He didn't seem skinny." Pyrrha said.

"But which one is skinny..."

"..."

"Exactly." Blake said.

"The assistant!" Nora said.

"It's the producer." Ren said.

"I know."

(Presses statement 8)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! What happened to the bad guy?

"Not the question I wanted to ask." Blake said.

Cody: Huh? Well... Well, he kinda didn't move. Not a bit. Like he was dead. I-I guess he's a real pro! What a great actor!

Phoenix: Y-yes, I suppose he was.

"Poor kid." Yang said.

"This is stupid. He's a witness for a murder trial. He should know that he's dead!" Weiss said.

"But would you say it to a kid?" Blake said.

"Yeah, if Ruby witnessed a murder and she didn't know, would you tell her that the person is dead?" Yang said.

"Why am I the example?!" Ruby said.

"Yes, I would. She's a huntress, death would be expected."

"Could you at least tell me in a nice way?"

"*sigh* Yes."

(Presents Cody's Camera on statement 9)

Phoenix: OBJECTION!

"There we go." Blake said.

Phoenix: Cody, what you just said seems, well, a little strange. Didn't you say before that you always bring your digital camera wherever you go? You were quite clear about that.

Cody: Huh!?

Phoenix: Cody, you shouldn't lie here. You understand that, right?

Judge: Mr. Wright! A word with you...

Phoenix: (Uh oh... was I putting the pressure on too much?)

"How dare you talk to a kid like that?! DIE!" Nora said.

"NO!" Jaune said.

Judge: What is this "digital" camera contraption you're talking about?

"Really?" Weiss said.

"He's old." Yang said.

Phoenix: It's umm... a digital camera, Your Honor. It's kind of a new sort of camera. (How do I explain that!?)

"You can tell how old that game is." Jaune said.

Judge: I see.

Phoenix: Anyway, Cody... (points) I can't believe you wouldn't bring your camera on a trip to the studios! You did bring it, didn't you?

Cody: Umm...

Edgeworth: OBJECTION! Mr. Wright! How cruel you are, to terrorize a poor child so!

Phoenix: (points) I don't care if he's a child or a prosecuting attorney! No one should lie in court!

Edgeworth: What do you mean "or a prosecuting attorney"!?

"Oh, you know what I mean." Jaune said.

"You bitch! I can't believe I have a crush on you!" Yang said.

Phoenix: Well, Cody?

Cody: Wh-what! Yeah, so I had my camera. So what!? You got a problem with that!?

Judge: So, you did have a camera? And did you use this camera?

Cody: W-why would I use it? I... I was too busy watching.

"Because you said that you always use it!" Weiss said.

"Why is he lying about this?" Pyrrha said.

Judge: Hmm... Very well. Please testify to the court about what you were so busy watching.

Witness Testimony

- What I saw -

Cody: Y-yeah, I had my camera with me.

But I was glued to the action! I couldn't take my eyes off it!

The Steel Samurai, he goes for the bad guy... wham!

Then... then the bad guy stopped moving!

He's so strong! The Steel Samurai rules!

Judge: Hmm... Ah? Is that all? Well, that was brief. Mr. Wright, your cross-examination.

Cross Examination

- What I saw -

(Presses statement 2)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! So you were watching the Steel Samurai. Did you watch the whole fight?

Cody: Y-yeah, of course!

Phoenix: (points) You didn't turn away, not even once?

Cody: N... no!

"He didn't see it." Ruby said.

Phoenix: Okay, then tell us exactly what happened.

Cody: Y-yeah! I'm getting to that!

(Presses statement 3)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! So the bad guy attacked him first?

"Again, not the question I wanted." Blake said.

Cody: Yeah!

Phoenix: What sort of person was this "bad guy"?

Cody: I told you, a person. He was a person.

Phoenix: How was he dressed?

Cody: ... I kinda don't remember. I was too busy watching the Steel Samurai!

Edgeworth: I see. And what happened next?

(Presses statement 4)

Phoenix: Why?

Cody: Huh? Whaddya mean, "why"?

Phoenix: Why wasn't the bad guy moving?

Cody: W-well 'cause the Steel Samurai brought him to justice!

Phoenix: And how exactly did he do that?

Cody: H-how did he do it? With a Samurai Kick! And a Samurai Punch! Samurai Chop! ... Samurai Slap! S-something like that.

"Ok, he definitely didn't see the end of the fight." Jaune said.

Phoenix: (He's still being vague about this...)

Cody: What! Don't give me that look, pops!

Phoenix: (How should I play this?)

[Wait and see what happens]

[Press him harder]

"HARDER!" Nora said.

(Picks Press him harder)

Phoenix: Cody.

Cody: Wh-what!?

Phoenix: Something's bothering me. Before you said that you "couldn't take your eyes off" the action.

Cody: Y-yeah? So what?

Phoenix: Yet you missed the most important part!

Edgeworth: OBJECTION! (Points) What is the meaning of this? The witness has stated what he saw quite clearly...

Phoenix: OBJECTION! You know as well as I do that he's being vague! (Slams) Tell me, what kind of murderer uses a "Samurai Slap"!?

"Someone very powerful?" Ruby said.

"Who is so strong that can kill with a slap?" Weiss said.

"... Someone?"

"..."

Edgeworth: M-mmph!

Phoenix: My point is this: Cody, you may have seen some of the Steel Samurai's fight... But you missed the most important part: the killing blow!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Order! Order! Mr. Wright! How could this be? Can you explain how he might have missed something so vital?

Phoenix: Um, well... er, that's the thing...

"It's like he acts before he thinks." Pyrrha said.

"That's Phoenix Wright." Jaune said.

Mia: Phoenix! I believe you're on the right track with this! Think: why didn't Cody see the climax of the fight? I know you! You can figure this out!

Judge: Mr. Wright, your answer! We have ascertained that this young boy is a great fan of the Steel Samurai... Why wouldn't he watch the climax of the fight?

[He couldn't watch it]

[He was watching something else]

[Show evidence]

"Uhhh, what now?" Yang said.

"I don't know..." Blake said.

"Well, he couldn't not watch it, so he must've been paying attention to something else at that moment." Jaune said.

"You think?"

"I guess. I don't see the first option being right or using evidence."

"Let's see."

(Picks He was watching something else)

Phoenix: He missed the climax of the fight... because he was looking at something else! Probably!

Edgeworth: "Probably"?

Judge: "Something else"?

"It's wrong?" Ruby said.

Edgeworth: Mr. Wright, explain yourself! What could possibly distract this boy from seeing his idol, the Steel Samurai, fight!? What do you claim he was looking at?

Phoenix: O-ooof! (C'mon, think of something... think of something... Nothing.)

"The first penalty?" Yang said.

"JAUNE, YOU DOOMED US!"

"I'm sorry! It was just an idea!"

"Too late! Say goodbye to your HP bar!" Nora said.

Judge: Mr. Wright! Please refrain from making baseless claims!

Phoenix: Y-yes... Sorry, Your Honor.

"Wait, no penalty?" Weiss said.

"Aww..."

Judge: Do you have another explanation for this? We have ascertained that this young boy is a great fan of the Steel Samurai... Why wouldn't he watch the climax of the fight?

[He couldn't watch it]

[He was watching something else]

[Show evidence]

"Maybe you have to present some evidence." Pyrrha said.

"That must be it." Blake said.

(Picks Show evidence)

Phoenix: Your Honor, I have evidence.

Judge: "Evidence"...?

Phoenix: Yes, Your Honor. Why did Cody look away from the fight?

"... Oh wait, it's the camera! It says right here that he's still learning how to use it."

"So he didn't see the killing blow because he was trying to take a picture." Ruby said.

"That's stupid. He has used the camera before, he has an album full of photos! Why did he have a problem now?!" Weiss said.

"Uhh, plot?"

"I hate the game's logic."

(Presents Cory's Camera)

Phoenix: TAKE THAT! Here's my proof!

Judge: What's that? The camera...?

Phoenix: The witness stated that he recently received this camera.

Judge: Yes, I'm aware of that.

Phoenix: He wasn't entirely familiar with its operation.

Judge: I'm aware of that, too. Ah!

Phoenix: Correct! Why would Cody be looking somewhere else at the critical moment? Because he was looking at his camera! (Slams) He was trying to take a picture!

Cody: Hey!

Phoenix: Bullseye!

Cody: W-what's your problem, pops! You got a thing for picking on little kids!?

"It's funny." Yang said.

"No, it's not!" Ruby said.

"Because you were my frequent victim."

"I hate you..."

Phoenix: (Pressing, not picking...)

Mia: Good job, Phoenix! Cody was lying, clearly. Smart of you to realize there was no way he could just stand there, watching his hero... and not take a picture!

Phoenix: Right! Cody? There was only one reason why you would have looked away from the fight. And that was because you wanted to take a picture. But having just received your camera, you weren't used to using it yet! So, you missed the climax of the fight. Correct?

Cody: ... ... ... Yeah.

"That was a long pause." Jaune said.

Mia: Well, Phoenix. I'll bet you anything he's hiding more than that. Have him testify again!

Phoenix: R-right. (Mia means business!) Your Honor. The defense would like to request that Cody Hackins testify once more.

Judge: V-very well. Cody? Could you please tell us about your camera... And about why you didn't take a picture of the fight?

Cody: Umm...

Phoenix: (Welcome to the real world, kid!)

"These objections are E for everyone." Yang said.

Witness Testimony

- No Photo? -

Cody: Yeah, you're right, pops.

The Steel Samurai had just escaped from the clutches of the villain.

So I held up my camera to take a picture!

But the lens wouldn't open in time, so I missed it.

Th-that's all that happened. Yup.

Judge: Hmm... Anything strange in that testimony, Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: I'm not sure... But I'd like to proceed with the cross-examination anyway.

Cross Examination

- No Photo? -

"Okay, I already know what to press." Blake said.

(Presses statement 5)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! That's all?

Cody: Y-yeah! I told you, I didn't take a picture!

Phoenix: (Hmm... I would have, once I got that lens open... Did he really not take a picture? Not even one?)

[Press him hard]

[Let it slide]

"I don't think so." Blake said.

"I don't let anything slide! I'm Phoenix Wright!" Jaune said.

"Except for my dick inside Edgeworth's tight asshole." Yang said.

"YANG!" Ruby said.

"What?"

"STOP! You're always doing this!"

"It's not even that funny." Jaune said.

"Besides, what makes you think it's not the other way around?" Nora said.

"Don't encourage her." Ren said.

"Can we just continue playing?" Weiss said.

(Picks Press him hard)

Phoenix: (Nah, he definitely would have taken a picture. There's got to be something here I can use!) Cody! Listen up, Cody Hackins. I know exactly what happened that day. (Points) You took a picture!

Cody: ... Hey!

Phoenix: (Bullseye...?)

Cody: H-how did you know!?

Phoenix: I see through all your lies Cody Hackins. It's one of my powers!

Cody: W-wow!

Phoenix: (This feels great!)

Everyone laughed.

"Lying to kids is awesome!" Yang said.

Cody: Y-yeah... Yeah, I took a picture.

Judge: Perhaps you can change your testimony to reflect this, Cody?

Cody: I took a few shots, but it was too late, so I erased 'em.

"Why would he erase it? He has an album full of the Steel Samurai's victories." Ruby said.

"Wait..." Blake said.

(Presses statement 5A)

Phoenix: HOLD IT! You "erased" them?

Cody: Y-yeah!

Phoenix: Why would you erase a picture of your beloved Steel Samurai, victorious?

Cody: Well... y'know. W-why would I want to keep a picture like that?

Phoenix: (Hmm... he's becoming less and less cooperative. I better find a clear contradiction soon... or some solid evidence.)

"Oh, I have to present the album now."

(Presents "Path to Glory" on statement 5A)

Phoenix: OBJECTION! Cody!

Cody: Wh-wh-what!? Man, every time you say "Cody" you follow it with something bad.

"Then stop lying!" Weiss said.

Phoenix: I just wanted to thank you for giving me this the other day.

Cody: Huh? O-oh... right.

Phoenix: What was it you told me then?

(Flashback)

Cody: I go to every live performance! I always take a picture when the Steel Samurai lands the final blow! Whizzam! I got 'em all! I never missed one! A perfect collection!

(End of flashback)

Phoenix: Cody. Did you really get a picture of the Steel Samurai standing victorious over his foe? If you did, I find it hard to believe that you would just erase it! (Slams) Wouldn't you keep it for your album?

Cody: Ah!

Judge: Mr. Wright... What exactly is this album?

Phoenix: It's called "Path to Glory." It's a collection of pictures of the Steel Samurai, all taken by Cody Hackins. He claims it's a perfect collection of every battle the Steel Samurai has won!

Judge: I... I see.

Phoenix: Don't you find this very odd, Your Honor? (Points) Among all his pictures of the Steel Samurai, none were taken that day!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Order! Mr. Wright. Have you an explanation? If the Steel Samurai had just defeated his adversary... I certainly would expect to see a picture of it in this album...

Phoenix: Exactly my point, Your Honor! ... ... ...! (No... wait... no way!)

"He figured it out." Ren said.

"Is Blake's theory correct?" Yang said.

"Damn right, it is. Come on, give it to me..." Blake said.

Mia: Phoenix? I think we've finally discovered the truth. And what a truth it is!

Phoenix: M-Mia... are we sure about this? Did he actually...?

Mia: Yes. I'm pretty sure what you're thinking is right. Tell them, Phoenix. Tell them what the truth is.

Judge: Mr. Wright! Please explain to the court what is going on here! Why was there no picture in the album from the day of the murder? Why would the boy have erased the photos he took?

[The photos were blurry]

[He erased them by mistake]

[The Steel Samurai didn't win]

"Oh my god, it is!" Yang said.

"It's not over yet." Blake said.

(Picks The Steel Samurai didn't win)

Phoenix: I can think of only one reason, your honor. (Slams) The Steel Samurai didn't win! That's why Cody deleted those photos.

Judge: You mean the Steel Samurai... lost?

Phoenix: Well, Cody? I'm right, aren't I? Tell the truth. The bad guy defeated the Steel Samurai!

Cody: N-n-n-no way! No! I-it's impossible! Th-the Steel Samurai never loses! He never loses to anyone! Ever!

Phoenix: Your Honor... The witness has revealed everything with his words. There was a reason why he lied and told us he didn't take a picture. The same reason he erased his precious photos! For Cody, it was inconceivable that the Steel Samurai could be defeated. (Slams) However, Cody witnessed the impossible! He saw the Steel Samurai lose! Yet to admit what he saw would destroy everything he believed in! (Points) That's why he lied and said the Steel Samurai won. (Slams) He couldn't handle the truth!

(There's noise in the gallery.)

"Holy fucking shit, he lost?!" Nora said, making most of them laughing.

"I can't believe it!" Yang said, playing along.

(The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: O-Order! I will have order!

"And you two in the gallery, shut the fuck up!" Nora said.

Judge: W-witness! I mean, Cody! Is this true!? W-what did you see? Tell the court what you saw!

Cody: I... Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

"Yes, we made him cry!" Yang said.

"Mia, I did it! I made a little kid cry!" Jaune said. Everyone started laughing.

"Good work! Just how I taught you."

"This is so mean!" Pyrrha said.

Phoenix: Cody... That day, you saw the Steel Samurai lose a fight. Right?

Cody: Waaaaaaaaaaaaah! Okay okay! Y-you're right! Th-the Steel Samurai f-fell down... Th-then he didn't m-move... Waaaaaaaaah!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Order! Order! Order!

Edgeworth: (slams) What kind of stunt are you trying to pull, Wright!? The Steel Samurai was the murderer, not the victim!

Phoenix: Yet according to your witness's testimony, the Steel Samurai was the one who fell!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Mr. Wright! What's going on?

Phoenix: Apparently, we have all made a serious error.

Edgeworth: (points) An... error? What's this all about!?

[Hammer was the victim]

[Steel Samurai was the victim]

[There was no victim]

"There was no victim!" Ruby said.

"Jack Hammer never existed! It was a figment of our imagination!" Nora said.

"And I have evidence. He then presents his attorney's badge." Jaune said. Most of them started laughing.

"Works for me!"

"And Edgeworth's like 'Are you fucking kidding me?!'." Yang said.

(Picks Steel Samurai was the victim)

Phoenix: If you understand what really happened, it's actually quite simple. At the end of the fight, the Steel Samurai fell to the ground, and lay still. In other words, the Steel Samurai was not the killer, he was the victim! Don't you see? (slams) Jack Hammer was the Steel Samurai!

(There's noise in the gallery.)

"Oh my fucking god, he's the Steel Samurai!" Nora said.

(The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Order! Order! Order! So, the Steel Samurai in this photograph... You're saying the man in this costume was the victim, Mr. Jack Hammer?

Phoenix: That's what I'm saying, Your Honor. Jack Hammer was present at the action scene run-through that morning. Thus, he obviously knew about Will Powers's foot injury.

Judge: B-but wait! Hadn't Mr. Hammer gone to Studio One already?

Phoenix: That's what everyone thought! But remember what Ms. Oldbag said in her testimony?

(Flashback)

Oldbag: On the day of the murder, I arrived at the guard station at 1:00 PM. Did I see poor old Hammer? Nope. He'd already gone to the studio before I got back to the guard station.

"Blah, blah, blah, I'm old and annoying and I will devour your SOOOUUUL!" Yang said.

"I love you, Edgie-poo! I will love you forever! FOREVER!" Nora said. Yang started laughing.

(End of flashback)

Phoenix: Mr. Jack Hammer left the Employee Area after lunch. However, no one saw him going to Studio One. Nor was there a picture of him. He waited for Mr. Powers to take a nap in his dressing room. Then he snuck into the dressing room and stole the Steel Samurai costume.

Judge: ...

Edgeworth: ...

Judge: But why would the victim do such a thing?

Phoenix: I... don't know.

"I was like... pulling stuff out of my ass, I don't know what I'm talking about." Yang said.

Cody: ... I get it!

Phoenix: ?

Cody: I thought that the Steel Samurai was moving strange. So it was a different person inside the suit! Pops!

Phoenix: Huh, me? What?

Cody: Actually, there was one piece of data I saved.

"There is a photo?!" Weiss sais.

Phoenix: Data?

Cody: Yeah, a photo on my digital camera!

Phoenix: ! (Slams) W-what!?

Edgeworth: (slams) Show us, quick!

Cody: No way man, not if you're gonna look at me like that!

Judge: Now!

"I will eat you if you don't! Like a plate of pancakes!"

"That's a creepy thought." Jaune said.

Cody: *sniff* Here... This is it.

(The photo is shown.)

"YES! I KNEW IT! I FUCKING KNEW IT! THERE IT IS! STUDIO 2! FUCKING CALLED IT! YES!" Blake said. She was so excited she stood up and exited the dorm.

"... She seems happy." Nora said.

A minute later, Blake returned.

"Sorry for that. Got very excited." Blake said.

"Too excited. Can we continue now?" Weiss said.

Judge: ... Well, looking at this it's still a little hard to say. I'm afraid that it could be anyone in that costume. Your opinion, Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: I agree, Your Honor. This isn't decisive evidence.

"OF COURSE IT IS! Don't ruin this for me now, Wright!" Blake said.

Judge: I'm sorry, this doesn't look like it's the proof we need. I'll give it back.

Mia: Wait, Phoenix!

Phoenix: Mia? What?

Mia: Look at that photo once more!

"Especially the part with the giant FUCKING NUMBER 2!"

Mia: That's it Phoenix! That photo is all the evidence you need to win this trial!

Phoenix: Wh-what!? Y-Your Honor! (Slams) May I see that photo once more please?

Judge: C-certainly. I don't see why not.

Mia: Phoenix! Show him! There's a glaring, decisive inconsistency with the facts as we know them in that photo!

Phoenix: (Find the inconsistency in the photo!)

(Points at Number 2 sign)

Phoenix: TAKE THAT! Your Honor! Look at this!

Judge: I see... a gate?

Phoenix: Might I draw your attention to the number on that gate?

Judge: The number? Ah yes. Well, it's hard to see, but it looks like a "2."

Phoenix: Clearly not a "1," Your Honor, correct?

Edgeworth: Aaaaaah!

Phoenix: I believe Mr. Edgeworth sees what I'm getting at.

Edgeworth: B-but... Th-that's impossible!

"Nothing is impossible if you object loud enough!" Jaune said.

"That's a rule to live by." Yang said.

Judge: Hmm? Eh? What's this all about? Please explain so that I might be shocked along with the rest of the court.

Some of them laughed.

"Please don't leave me out of this! I'm a senile old man, I don't understand anything!" Nora said.

Phoenix: I'll use the studio guidemap. The body was found here, in Studio One. However, what do we see in this photo taken at the time of the murder? It does NOT say "1" on that gate in the photo. Your Honor! Here is the true scene of the crime! (Show the judge where the murder took place!)

"I feel like I'm talking to a toddler." Blake said.

"I know." Weiss said.

(Points at Studio Two)

Phoenix: TAKE THAT! (Slams) Here, at Studio Two.

Judge: I see! That would explain the "2" on the gate in the photo.

Phoenix: Your Honor, I find it very significant that the murder took place in Studio Two!

[The trailer is there]

[The path was blocked]

[No filming is done there]

"Uh... all of them sound correct." Ruby said.

"The first two at least." Jaune said.

(Picks The path was blocked)

Phoenix: (points) The path to the trailer was blocked!

Judge: So we have heard.

Phoenix: The path was blocked at 2:15... (slams) In other words, the victim went to Studio Two before that time!

"Actually, based on the flashback, it wouldn't be that hard to go to the studio on foot." Weiss said.

"I would've said the same thing, but who would be out during a storm?" Ren said.

"Right."

"You mean Phoenix Wright." Yang said.

"Shut the fuck up."

"No."

Judge: Yes... yes, I suppose that would be the case.

Phoenix: Remember Mr. Sal Manella's testimony? Allow me to remind the court: He said no one in the trailer was guilty because they could not have gone to Studio One. (Points) Yet, in actuality, the reverse was true! Only someone in the trailer could have committed this murder! (Slams) They were the only ones with access to the scene of the crime: Studio Two!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Phoenix: As you may recall, there is a trailer in Studio Two. Now, on that day, a meeting was held in that very trailer. There was a break in the meeting corresponding to the time of death. During that break, Mr. Sal Manella and Ms. Dee Vasquez were outside, eating steak. (Slams) They were at the scene of the crime!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: O-order! Order!

Phoenix: The defense makes the following claims: (slams) The scene of the crime was Studio Two! The person that the security guard, Ms. Oldbag saw was the victim, Mr. Jack Hammer! Mr. Hammer, for some reason, stole a Steel Samurai costume. (Points) Then he went to Studio Two!

Edgeworth: OBJECTION!

"No, shut up. You're wrong." Yang said.

Edgeworth: This is madness! Jack Hammer is the victim! The victim! Why would he steal a Steel Samurai costume!? (Slams) (points) Are you suggesting he did so to cover up the details of his own murder!?

Phoenix: W-well, no, of course not...

Judge: Hmm...

Edgeworth: Or do you have proof!? Give me proof that the victim, Jack Hammer, stole the costume!

[I have proof]

[I don't have proof]

"Oh, I have proof." Blake said.

(Picks I have proof)

Phoenix: I have proof!

Edgeworth: (slams) Y-you do!?

Judge: You do, Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: (Now that they're so surprised suddenly I'm much less confident... I think I'm right, though!) Here's my proof that Jack Hammer stole the costume!

"We're finally presenting the pill bottle?" Yang said.

"That's right."

(Presents Empty Bottle)

Phoenix: TAKE THAT! This is it.

Judge: An empty... medicine bottle?

Phoenix: I found this on the table in the Employee Area. The same table where Mr. Hammer and Mr. Powers ate. The label reads "sleeping pills."

"Something that should have been on the name of the evidence instead of just 'empty bottle'." Weiss said.

Judge: "Sleeping pills"...?

Phoenix: The defendant, Mr. Powers, spent that entire afternoon sleeping. He was drugged... by Mr. Hammer!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Wait a moment... That bottle does raise some suspicions, yes. But there is no proof that Mr. Hammer used it.

Phoenix: Your Honor, I have an idea.

[Test Powers's blood]

[Fingerprint the bottle]

[Examine Hammer's body]

"Fingerprint obviously." Blake said.

"Was that last question even necessary?" Jaune said.

"They needed to put that last one in." Yang said.

(Picks Fingerprint the bottle)

Judge: An... idea? Very well, let's hear it.

Phoenix: I want to check this bottle for fingerprints! If my claim is true, Mr. Hammer's fingerprints should show up on this bottle!

Edgeworth: Hmm...

Judge: I suppose you're right. Very well. The court will take possession of the bottle.

(Empty Bottle given to the judge.)

Judge: This court will suspend proceedings on the current trial for today. Cody Hackin's [sic] testimony has revealed new possibilities in this case. In fact, things may have happened very differently than we previously thought. The Steel Samurai seen by Ms. Oldbag may have been the victim, Jack Hammer. The scene of the crime was not Studio One, but Studio Two. And those in the trailer did have time to commit murder. Mr. Wright?

Phoenix: Yes, Your Honor?

Judge: Your homework is to find the answer to the following question: Why would Mr. Hammer steal the Steel Samurai costume? Also, who killed him, and why? Find the answers for me by tomorrow.

Phoenix: (That's a lot of homework!)

"I want all this written in a 10000 word report. And no excuses." Nora said.

"Oh man!" Jaune said.

"Erm, your honor... I, uh..." Ruby said.

"You know it's good when it starts with 'erm'." Yang said.

"Erm, I... my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my- my dog ate the report..." Jaune said.

"... The fuck did I JUST SAY?! DIIIIIE!" Nora said.

"Nooooooo!"

"Can we continue now?" Weiss said.

Judge: Mr. Edgeworth.

Edgeworth: Mm?

"You get no homework." Nora said.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Jaune said. Most of them started laughing.

Judge: You will need to reconsider your stance in this case. Above all, you will need to reconsider your suspicion of Mr. Will Powers.

Edgeworth: As you say, Your Honor.

Judge: This trial will be extended until tomorrow. This is the last extension!

(There's noise in the gallery. The judge pounds his gavel.)

Judge: Very well... Court is adjourned!

(The judge pounds his gavel.)

"BAP! Okay, where are my pancakes? Time for round 2..." Nora said. Yang started laughing like crazy.

October 19, 2:47 PM

District Court

Defendant Lobby No. 1

Phoenix: Whew! That was a close one!

Mia: We were saved by a hair, but that's all that counts. I thought seriously about going home about three times during the trial.

Phoenix: M-me too!

Will: Really? You both seemed so... so confident!

Phoenix: Hah! Maybe I should take up a career in acting? I was ready to pronounce you dead about three times back there.

"Wow, really?!" Yang said.

Mia: Me too!

"Even Mia?!" Ruby said.

Will: D-dead!?

Mia: Hoh hoh. Of course, we're kidding.

Will: Are you sure?

"I wasn't." Jaune said.

Phoenix: (I wasn't kidding...)

Everyone started laughing.

"Jaune, have you played this game before?" Pyrrha said.

"No."

"You're becoming Phoenix!" Nora said.

Phoenix: Now, Mr. Powers. We have to go make our final investigation. But I promise you, we'll find the true killer by tomorrow's trial!

Will: R-right! Thanks! *sniff*

To be continued.

"Finally... One more day. I need a break." Blake said.

"All of us." Yang said.

"So... do we all agree it's the producer?"

"Yeah." everyone said.

"Althought, she doesn't seem strong enough to do anything to him." Pyrrha said.

"Maybe it was an accident." Ruby said.

"Or maybe she hired some thugs to kill him." Nora said.

"Hmm... nah." Yang said.


And done! Sorry for the delay. University and lazyness. Again, don't expect often updates. Anyways, like, follow and leave a review. See you soon!