Hope for All- chapter 9
The days over the next week and a half seemed to blend into one another. Angela's appointments every few days became routine. Tony made it a habit to call her office after each appointment to check in with her, something both looked forward to each time. On day five, Angela started taking the oral medication to stimulate egg growth. Aside from some headaches and some minor abdominal "discomfort" as the days progressed, Angela was able to go about her normal, regular routine. By day fourteen, Angela was given the go ahead to do the trigger shot that night and the insemination the day after.
As Angela was walking into her office, the phone was already ringing. Mona wasn't in yet, so Angela ran over the answer it. "Hello, this is the Bower Agency, Angela Bower speaking."
"Hey Angela. I know I'm calling a bit earlier, but I needed to get to my class and wanted to see how it went this morning" he said.
"It went well. Actually, they gave me the go ahead to do the trigger shot tonight at 8pm. They are open tonight until 5pm. Can you meet me at the clinic sometime this afternoon so they can go over how to administer it?" asked Angela.
Tony gripped the phone a little tighter and took a deep breath before answering. "Yes I can. I can be there by about 3pm. Does that work?" he asked.
"Yes that's perfect. There's a pharmacy down the street from the clinic where they sent the prescription for the trigger shot. I'll stop there first and then meet you there. Thank you Tony… for everything" said Angela.
"Let's just make sure I don't pass out on you before you thank me for this part Angela!" said Tony with a nervous laugh. "You'll be fine Tony I promise. Okay I have to go now. I'll see you there at 3pm" Angela said before hanging up. "Let's hope it will really be fine" Angela said out loud to an empty office before getting to work.
Tony got to the clinic a few minutes early. He stopped at a store for a quick purchase before heading to the clinic. He had to double back to the jeep and hide the purchase from Angela, but still managed to get there early.
"You can do this Micelli! It's not going to be nearly as bad as you think. You'll be fine!" Tony was whispering to himself as Angela was walking towards him. She paused a few moments before approaching Tony, opting instead to watch him from afar. She could tell he was deep in thought, actually potentially talking to himself out loud. Angela knew from the first mention of injections Tony was apprehensive. She hoped between the nurse's demonstration today and her reassurance, Tony's nerves would lessen. She decided he'd had enough time to stew on his own and walked the rest of the way to him.
"Hey Tony. Everything okay?" she asked. "Oh hi Angela. Yes everything is okay. Shall we?" he said as he opened the door for her.
"I picked up the trigger shot on my way over. They said they have a demo one here for us to practice with. Do you have any questions before we go in?" Angela asked.
"They don't make this trigger shot in a pill form?" Tony chuckled, trying to lighten his anxious mood.
"No I don't think so. If this is really too much Tony, I understand. I'm sure Mother would be able to do it" said Angela.
"No! I mean no Angela I've got this, I promise. Just not a huge fan of needles. They will go over it now and I'll be fine" he said, not sure who he was trying to convince more, Angela or himself.
A few minutes later, they were called back in to meet with a nurse. They were led to a small conference room with posters, diagrams and charts plastered to the walls. A dry erase board was also there with written out information. They took the seats nearest the door while the nurse took the seat across from them. She handed out the instructions and the demo trigger shot. She was very patient with Tony as he took the needle and went through each step. The shot would be administered into Angela's abdomen. They learned how to prep the injection site, set up the needle and how to inject the medication. Angela took notes to reference later. After a little while, both Tony and Angela felt comfortable with the process and thanked the nurse.
"If you have any questions, you can call the after hours number. Remember, the shot needs to be administered right at 8pm. The insemination procedure will occur 36 hours afterwards. Come to the office an hour before so you can be prepped for the procedure and Tony can give his semen sample. The procedure only takes about five minutes but you will need to lie flat for twenty minutes afterwards. In case I don't see you, I wish you both all the best!" the nurse said as she walked them out.
Once outside, Tony and Angela walked back to Tony's jeep. He opened the door for her before heading to his side.
"Well that went better than I expected! Just hope I remember everything she said. I can't believe we are less than 48 hours away" said Tony.
"I know I can't believe it either. It's really happening Tony!" said Angela with more enthusiasm in her voice than she previously allowed herself to feel. Tony reached across and grabbed Angela's hand. He looked down at their joined hands in her lap, then slowly raised his gaze up to her eyes. This time, it was Angela who leaned in, only a few inches from Tony's face. She rested her forehead against his, their eyes momentarily closing, just feeling the presence of each other. No words were said as they stayed like that for what seemed like hours, until they both pulled back and sat back in their seats. No additional words were needed as they spent the rest of the car ride home lost in their own thoughts of this brand new path they were about to take.
Later that night, Tony and Angela rushed through their normal dinner time routine. Dishes were left in the sink and kids were ushered out of the kitchen. They both wanted adequate time to organize the injection supplies and prep as much as possible without being interrupted by any inquiring minds. At around 7:45, Angela and Tony grabbed what they needed and headed upstairs to her room. Just to be safe, Tony locked her door. The one they were most concerned about busting into the room was Mona and she was on a date, but they couldn't be too careful in Tony's mind.
"Okay Angela, we have everything laid out here in the counter. I re-read your notes from earlier and I think I'm ready. We have exactly five minutes left. Am I missing anything?" Tony asked.
"No Tony, I think we have everything. The syringe is prepped, the alcohol pad is ready and the gauze is here. Remember, there could be a little blood, that's normal. Please don't pass out on me Tony!" Angela laughed nervously.
"Okay it's 8pm on the dot! Here goes nothing!" said Tony. He followed the instructions word for word. Angela supported herself against the bathroom sink, while Tony moved into place. Carefully, he pinched some of her skin on her abdomen like he was shown and inserted the needle, pushing the medication slowly into her skin. Angela slightly winced in pain, which momentarily shook up Tony. He was able to regroup fast and finished the task, pulling back the needle. Angela took the gauze and placed it where the needle was removed, gently rubbing the injection site. Some slight bleeding appeared but it soon stopped. Both Tony and Angela stood silently for a few moments, relaxing for the first time in longer than they both could remember.
"Ta-da! We did it! Now that wasn't so bad now was it?" asked Tony with a sense of pride and accomplishment in his voice. Noticing this, Angela laughed. "Yes Tony it wasn't so bad. Just hope that the insemination works and we don't have to do IVF. I've read up on that and that's multiple needles each day for many, many days" she said, still chuckling.
"Eh oh, oh eh. This is gonna work! Either way, I feel like a pro now so bring it on!" laughed Tony. "Be careful what you wish for mister!" she said as she cleaned up the bathroom. Both finished up and headed out to her bedroom.
"Thank you again Tony. I really do appreciate it" she said as she moved in to kiss his cheek. Tony turned his face at the last second and placed a searing kiss on Angela's lips. He took his hands and placed them on the sides of her face, slowly moving them upwards through her hair. Angela pulled him closer until they were flesh against each other. She wrapped her arms around him, caressing his muscular back, moving up to his shoulders. Tony released his hands from her hair, simultaneously bringing her hands down along with his own.
He momentarily got lost in her eyes before entering into another passionate kiss. Angela started pulling at his shirt, freeing it from his jeans. Tony took his cues from Angela's movements and started to unbutton her blouse, revealing her cream colored bra. He was just about to remove the blouse completely when there was a knock at the door.
"Mom? Tony? Are you in there? I need Tony's help with my shop homework. This birdhouse is due tomorrow and I can't get it right!" shouted Jonathan.
"Ummm yes we are here sweetheart. Just finished up my injection. We will be right out" said Angela, much more calmly than she was acting as she rushed to pull herself together. Tony was working fast to tuck his shirt back in his pants, fixing his hair and calm himself down enough to be presentable to Jonathan. Once they were done, each gave the other a once over and signs of approval. Before opening the door, Angela gave him a quick peck on the lips as Tony walked by. Both smiled at each other as Tony opened the bedroom door to go and help Jonathan.
The morning of the insemination, Tony and Angela were up and moving way before the rest of the family. Neither had slept well, a combination of excitement over the procedure and thinking practically nonstop about their impromptu make out session two nights earlier; both wondered over and over again how far they would have gone had Jonathan not interrupted them. In true Tony and Angela form, neither mentioned what had transpired between them and swept it under the rug the following day.
Tony insisted they both have breakfast before leaving the house, despite Angela's protest. She managed to still have her juice and decaf coffee, while trying to stomach the toast and eggs. "I wonder what Tony would do if I asked for a bowl of Crunchy Crawlers for breakfast" she thought to herself, remembering their first early morning double entendre conversation so many years ago. She let out a soft chuckle at the memory.
"Eh oh oh eh! What's so funny?" asked Tony. "Oh nothing. I was just thinking of another breakfast we shared, one of our first ones actually" she said with another laugh.
"In the mood for some Crunchy Crawlers?" Tony said seductively as Angela almost spit out her coffee. "Ummm uhh…" Angela stuttered.
"Relax Angela! You know I got rid of those years ago. All empty calories. You need something much more nutritious to start your day" said Tony as he watched Angela's face turn a dark shade of pink.
"Well look at the time. We need to leave now if we are going to get there by 7am. I'll go wake the kids. Call Mother and wake her up. Remind her she's on duty this morning for the kids and making sure they get off to school" she said as she cleared her dishes and made her way into the living room.
After grumpy kids were awakened, including Mona, Tony and Angela were on the road headed into the city. Traffic was manageable and they ended up getting a parking spot close to the clinic. Angela was about to get out of the jeep, when Tony gently grabbed her arm to keep her in the car.
"Hold on a second Angela. Look, I know this isn't a guarantee, but deep down in my heart, I know we are going to have a baby together. So, I got you or uhhh…? us this" Tony said as he reached into his glove compartment and grabbed out a small present wrapped in light yellow and green wrapping paper. Tears were forming in her eyes as she gazed down at the small present.
"Go ahead and open it Angela" said Tony. She carefully ripped open the paper to reveal a little blue and pink baby book. Tears were now streaming down her face as she gently touched the book, flipping through the blank pages.
"Oh Tony this… this is beautiful. Thank you, thank you so much. There's no one else in the world I'd rather fill these pages with than you" she said through tears.
"Okay let's get the show on the road!" said Tony enthusiastically.
After Angela and Tony arrived, they were taken back to their rooms to get ready for the procedure. Angela was once again given the awful looking hospital gown and socks. She stored her belongings in one of the lockers and waited for the nurse. After filling out some additional paperwork, she was escorted to the procedure room and helped onto the table. A few minutes later, Tony was escorted into the room and given a seat right next to Angela's head. He grabbed her hand and placed a soft kiss on top.
Just then, Dr. Greene came in with a nurse. Both Angela and Tony had to sign more paperwork. The nurse confirmed both their names and dates of birth on the paperwork, the identity bands and lastly the sperm sample. Once all was confirmed, the doctor proceeded to start the insemination. Tony was more than a little uncomfortable sitting there, seeing Angela lying there. While she didn't seem like she was in any real pain, he imagined her lying there for the other tests, in pain and by herself. He didn't really think he would have been able to do anything to stop the pain, but at least he would have been there to comfort her. And if today's procedure resulted in a baby, he knew he wouldn't have missed being here with Angela for this precious moment for anything in the world.
"Okay we are all done! Ms. Bower, you need to lie flat here for at least fifteen to twenty minutes. Once the time is up, the nurse will come in and take you back to the room to change. Bed rest for the next two days. A bloodwork appointment will be scheduled for you in approximately seven to ten days. If there are any complications such as fever, severe pain or vomiting, call our emergency number or go to the ER. Good luck you two!" he said as he left the room.
The lights were dimmed and soft, relaxing music was playing in the background as Angela lay there trying to relax. Both Angela and Tony were lost in their own thoughts again, their hands still holding onto one another's. Angela couldn't help but think of the precious gift Tony got her, no them, this morning. She couldn't wait to start filling the blank pages with sonograms and then one day real photographs of their baby. She hadn't really allowed herself to be truly excited about this process until recently. And on top of her excitement over the possibility of a baby was the additional possibility of something happening between her and Tony. She felt elated, like she was on cloud nine.
Tony was having similar thoughts as Angela. He kept going back to picturing what their potential baby could and would look like- would he have his olive skin, dark brown hair? Would she have Angela's beautiful eyes, her gorgeous smile? Would he or she have similar features to Samantha and Jonathan too? The possibilities were endless and Tony enjoyed each and every one of them.
Before either of them realized it, the time was up and the nurse came in to escort Angela back to the changing room. Tony went out to sign the discharge paperwork and after a few minutes Angela came out ready to go home. Both were smiling at one another and engaged in a brief kiss before linking arms and walking out of the clinic together.
Angela's temporary bed rest went as smooth as possible for someone not used to taking time for herself and resting. Tony was there for her every step of the way, making sure she had enough food, drinks and entertainment. By the end of the two days, Angela found herself enjoying the pampering, although she could see how if it was any longer Tony's attention could go overboard.
The next week and a half went by smoothly as well. Tony continued to dote on Angela, cooking her favorite meals, not allowing her to do anything too strenuous and making sure she rested whenever possible. The kids and Mona did their parts as well, making sure they were on their best behaviors.
Angela kept waiting for her body to give her a sign she was pregnant, but so far she didn't feel any different. She had to keep reminding herself that it was still very early if she was in fact pregnant. She didn't find out she was pregnant with Jonathan until she was six weeks along and the symptoms only started around that time. When her nerves and anxiety got the best of her, she just had to stop and take some deep breaths.
The morning of her pregnancy test, Angela took the early train in to get to the clinic for her appointment. Tony got up early too and made sure she got to the train station alright.
"Thank you for the ride Tony. I'll call you once I hear back from the doctor" said Angela as she grabbed her things to leave the car.
"Wait Angela" he said as he grabbed her arm. "I… I just wanted to wish you luck. And to let you know whatever happens today, we are in this together okay?" Tony said with care and compassion in his voice.
"Oh Tony… I know we are. I'm just so nervous. I keep waiting for my body to give me a sign it worked but I know it's still really early. It's just… I want this so much Tony" she said as tears started to fall.
"I know you do sweetheart, so do I but this is out of our control. There's just as much of a chance our baby is already here as it isn't so let's just focus on that for now okay? I lo… look forward to hearing from you later Angela" Tony said trying to cover his slip of the tongue.
Smiling over what Tony said and well, didn't say, Angela reached over and gently squeezed his hand. Once again, no additional words were spoken, their actions communicating everything they needed them to.
Angela spent the morning and early afternoon trying to work, without much success. She kept getting lost in daydream after daydream- telling the family if she was pregnant, shopping for baby clothes and furniture, how she'd look pregnant, holding a perfect little baby in her arms.
Her longest daydreams, the ones that would consume her thoughts the longest, were those of her and Tony. "Did he really call me sweetheart this morning or did I imagine that? How amazing did that feel to be in his arms, kissing him so passionately. Oh Angela you have to stop this!" she thought to herself.
By 1pm, Angela had had enough and decided to pack up and go home for the day. She called the clinic to see if her results were in yet, which they were not. She requested they called the house number for her results.
"Mother, I'm heading home early today, going to work from home as I can't seem to focus here. Please cover for me while I'm gone" she said as she grabbed some files and paperwork to put in her briefcase.
"Yes dear. Still haven't heard anything yet?" asked Mona. "No, I just called and the result aren't in yet. I can't seem to focus here so I'm going to try it at home" she said.
After she was sure Angela was out of the office, she called home. "Bower residence Tony speaking!"
"Hi Tony it's Mona. I just wanted to let you know that Angela is on her way home. She was going a little stir crazy waiting for the results so she should be home in about an hour."
"Is she okay Mona? It's not like her to cut outta work early!" said Tony rather loudly.
"Yes she's fine. Nothing a little Tony TLC won't fix, wink wink" she said.
"Mona! Okay I need to finish up stuff around here if she's coming home early. Try and do some work while she's gone okay?" he said before hanging up the phone and getting back to his chores.
About an hour later, Angela walked in the house, dropping her briefcase and coat by the rack. Tony came in through the kitchen with a vase filled with pink roses and a plate of freshly baked cookies.
"Oh Tony they are beautiful! And cookies too- you've covered all my favorites!" she said as she took a cookie off the plate.
"Well I know how much the ummm house likes fresh flowers and cookies!" Tony laughed, causing Angela to start laughing as well. Their laughter was interrupted by the phone ringing. Both Tony and Angela stared at the phone, then each other and then back at the phone. By the third ring, Angela moved to answer the phone.
"Hello? Yes this is she…( a long pause as the caller spoke to Angela). Yes I see. Yes… yes okay. I will. Thank you" she said as she placed the phone back.
Tony couldn't tell from her conversation if it was good news or bad news. He took a few steps towards Angela as she turned around.
"Better luck next time I guess" she said as she started to walk past Tony, tears threatening to fall. Tony, with tears in his own eyes, reached out for Angela just as she passed him by. He pulled her into a tight embrace as they both could no longer hold back their own tears, their own sadness.
