*TW: SH*

The first 6 months I spent perfecting my idea of the iron man suit that didn't need anymore perfecting. I barely slept, ate maybe once a day… If I remembered to eat.

Pepper left a message asking about me and how I was doing. Filled me in on their crazy event of things. Told me to call my dad because he's too stubborn to check on me. Until he finally did about 2 months later…


I was making ramen on the stove while I had Friday play my dad's voicemail.

"Hey kiddo. Just checking in. Want to see how you're doing."

There was a long pause. I grabbed a couple slices of cheese from the fridge and place one in my bowl, put the noodles and poured some broth in, putting the last cheese one top.

"Alexis, I know that you loved him. If I knew confronting you about him would have driven you away like it did, I- I never would have brought it up."

I went and sat down in the oversized chair next to the fireplace with my bowl of ramen, fidgeting with my sweater.

"I miss you. Please call me back. Love you."

Phone disconnected.

"I left that you two weeks ago."

I looked over my shoulder and saw him standing in the kitchen. "There's some ramen left on the stove if you want some." I started to eat mine.

Dad walked over and sat on the couch. "You look tired."

"I don't really sleep much these days." I took a bite. "Why are you here?"

We stared at each other for a few minutes. Then dad asked, "How long?" He tugged at his sleeve.

I went back to my food, ignoring him.

"Alexis, please come home." He pleaded. "I'm worried about you."

"How's Steve?" I asked as tears hung on my eyes.

"He's worried about you. He doesn't remember." He answered, knowing what I really meant. "Pepper, Thor, and I are the only people who know. We plan to keep it that way."

I kept eating.

"Alexis, please come home. I'm worried about you."

I shook my head. "Why?"

"Because you're my daughter. And you're mourning, you shouldn't have to do this alone."

I closed my eyes and let the tears fall. I slowly nodded my head and said, "Okay."

I looked at my dad who was trying not to cry himself.


I was curled up in my big chair reading a book while wearing shorts and a hoodie. Haven't really left my room in the tower since I've been back. I haven't felt very social but I've also being alone for almost 8 months.

"You've been back a few weeks and you never came to say hi?" Steve asked standing in the door way of to my room.

I smiled, looking up from my book. "You could say I've been alone for so long I'm finding it difficult to get back into society."

"I get that. I had a hard time adjusting when I came out of the ice." He came and sat on the edge of my bed. "I could help you adjust back into society."

"Adjust back to New York or are you asking me to go with you to D.C.?" I closed my book. "How would you expect me to say hi if you're not even here?" I answered his first question.

"You could visit."

"I'm kind of in lock down right now."

"I heard." He nodded his head slightly.

"Did you?" He raised his eyebrow and tilted his head. "Guess not." I went back to my book.

"You want to talk about it?" Steve asked.

"I need you to be specific." I didn't look up from my book.

"Why did you cut your wrists?"

"I lost someone close to me. I isolated myself away from the world. My isolation was lonely. It was painful. I needed to control the pain." I brushed my thumb over my wrist. "I needed to feel it on my terms."

"I'm-"

"Don't." I cut him off. "I'm just trying to move on.

"Then come with me to D.C."

I shook my head.

"Why not?" He asked, pulling my book into my lap. He knelt right next to my chair.

Before I could answer, his phone went off.

"You should probably check that." I interlocked my fingers with his.

"It can wait."

"The world needs you." I looked into his calming blue eyes.

"The world survived without me for 70 years. It can survive a few hours more." He push my hair behind my ear. "Come on." He stood up, pulling me out of my chair. "Let's go get some food."

He held me against his chest and we just stared into each other's eyes. He looked like his was calculating his next move. Almost arguing with himself. I was getting ready to say something but he finally made up his mind about what he wanted to do.

He kissed me.

And I kissed him back.

———

He spent a few more days in New York before returning to D.C. I spent the next year either in the lab or in the gym. Steve would drop by every now and then. We would catch up and grab dinner.

Until he was blasted on the news as being an enemy to the country. A few days later, there was a high amount of information leaked. Steve was in the hospital. I went to see him, he explained - clarified everything. Told me how his friend - Bucky - was alive and he needed to find him. He still managed to make time for me though.