chapter 10: a weight lifted
Kara did not go right away to the infirmary but made a detour to the nearby river. The light of the moon rebounded on the moving water, letting it sparkle black and white. It was quiet, no one around with her. She let loose all she had been holding in. The grief she had not allowed herself to feel with every loss. The powerlessness when one of her patient's eyes glazed over, no longer breathing. The guilt of being alive when others were not. The general was right. It would be outrageous to think she could control any of it. All she could do was strive to be the best she could be in her practice and heal as best she could. The rest was beyong any earthly capabilities. Even Grisha could not help dying.
" Are you ok?". She turned around to see Luka approaching softly from behind. She wiped the tears from her face, " Actually yes, I needed to get a few things off my chest". Luka looked concerned, " Is there anything I can do to help?" Her chuckle was watery, " It's kind of you to ask but no. Some things have to heal on their own". Luka opened his mouth to say something but closed it quickly. He sat next to her on a large rock overlooking the river. Kara enjoyed his presence. His youthful energy and apparent clumsiness was a relief from all the wary soldiers she encountered. He said nothing for a while. He thought he would take her mind off whatever was bothering her. " Do you know what you'll be doing once we get to Os Alta?". She took in a shaky breath, grounding herself after her release of emotion, " I guess I want to visit the palace library, read through the last medical practices. I'll meet with the palace healers, maybe exchange tips with them. Other than that, maybe offer my services to those in need in the city". Luka pouted, " that sounds way too serious and not much fun". Kara chuckled, " what would you have me do?". Luka grinned, " I could take you to see my classes. As an Alkemi I don't have fighting training like the summoners do I have lectures and we have a lab for experiments. One time, one of my mates set half the room on fire mixing herbs and powders". Kara shivered, " That doesn't sound like much fun either". Luka nudged her with his elbow, " I didn't get to the best part! On our free time we go swimming in the lake in the summer and we have steam baths in the Banya in the winter. Plus, the little palace is beautiful. You would like it". Kara smiled, " Maybe you'll give me a tour then?". Luka smiled back happily, " Of course!".
Luka and Kara stayed side by side for a while until night had truly set in their surroundings. They could no longer see the river and torches had been lit within the camp. Luka stood up, brushing off dust from his kefta before holding out his hand to help Kara stand. " I actually came to find you because Seraphine was getting worried. She told me I could either learn the 15 uses of permafrost moss or go find you". Kara laughed, " It's easy to guess why you are here then". She patted Luka on the arm, " Thank you. Talking with you has lightened my mood". Luka's eyes sparkled in the dark, " anytime". They walked together back to camp and Luka waved goodbye to head back to the Grisha tents. Kara set towards the infirmary. When she arrived, Artyom was helping a young dehydrated soldier back into bed. Seraphine was coaxing another soldier to drink one of her sleeping draughts. Yurii was distributing blankets to the patients for the night.
All three of them looked relieved to see her unharmed.
Seraphine hobbled to her and place a hand on her cheek, " where were you Dorogaya? You had us worried". She searched Kara's face for clues but she saw only that the young woman was tired and sad. Kara caught Seraphine's hand and gently squeezed it before moving away, " I am fine Seraphine, I was with general Kirigan discussing healing procedures". Artyom, who had overheard, snorted, " That explains it then". Kara looked over at him, " explains what?". Artyom finished giving water to the soldier he was tending, " General Biryukov was looking for you. He looked irritated and asked that you report to him first thing in the morning." Kara moaned. She should have known when she bumped into him earlier that evening that he would want an explanation for her present in the black tent.
Seraphine looked at Kara, puzzled, " Why would the General of the Second Army want to discuss healing with you? Should he not have called Ania for that?". Kara was not very good at lying so she tried to say as little as possible, " He was impressed with our teamwork on the prince and prince's cousin. I guess he wonders if there is room for improvement in what we do". Artyom shook his head and muttered under his breath, " Of course the Grisha general would be critical of our work. It's our work that saved our monarchs. He is irritated by our progress". Kara frowned, " It's not like that Artyom. He appreciates the fact that we did better working hand in hand between our two infirmaries". Artyom scoffed, " So you say". Kara decided to drop it. Artyom's disdain for Grisha was notorious, she would not be able to change his mind. " I'm sorry I'm back so late, is there anything you need me to tend to?". Seraphine thought for a second, " We only have one dehydrated young man here and the 2-3 soldiers back in their tents that need checking over. I think you can rest tonight. You look like you need it". Kara sighed, " So everyone seems to say". She dropped her satchel and decided to look over the records following the remaining patients before heading off to bed. She saw that she had been heading out to check a soldier from the 8th batallion with a sprained arm before she was swept away to the darkling's tent. She took note to check on him at first light and to check on the prince and his cousin later tomorrow. She wished all of them good night and slipped under the covers of her bed and closed her eyes.
