A/N: EDIT: Sorry for any errors and mistakes in this chapter; I tried my best to find and fix them; I'm really under the weather T_T
We're winding up for the big timeskips; hope you're ready; this chapter's savage.
You don't threaten Naruto.
It never ends well.
Speaking of wellness, my health has been...well, better. No signs of cancer as of yet, but my new doctor was both shocked and appalled at the sheer incompetence of the practice I was visiting before, apparently I've had an infection and didn't even realize it; getting put on some pretty heavy antibiotics to get rid of that in addition to all the vitamin supplements I mentioned awhile back. Atop that, Long Covid has been messing with my lungs for so long now that they apparently have reduced function.
I'm a rather tall fellow, who's quite active in my day to day live -two jobs will do that to you- but even so, its still taken its toll on me.
Its going to be awhile before I'm properly well again, but even then, I aim to keep updating. It helps distract from the pain.
RWBY may have been canned by Warner Bros. but we fanfiction writers are out here trying to keep the light alive, as it were. So here we go. The fate of this story depends on you, the reader. Your feedback determines the fate of this tale, and many others.
Naruto's going further and further down the rabbit hole...woe unto his enemies.
As ever, I own no references, quotes, themes or memes. They're tributes to legends far greater than little 'ol me.
We all know the quote below...funny thing, it also makes for a great declaration of war.
So in the (paraphrased) words of a certain radio demon...
"Let's begin~! I'm gonna make you wish I never came along ~! Tune on in...
...when I'm done...your status quo will know its race is run...
...ohhh, this will be FUN~!
~You Know Who.
Rattle the Girls
...I look like a strawberry pimp."
"Nonsense, you look great!"
"Do I...?
Naruto pivoted, considering himself in the mirror. A smiling stranger stared back at him. "...?"
The outfit in question was a radical departure from his norm; a red pinstripe coat bearing blood-red lapels piped with ragged white along the bottom hem. Beneath that, he wore a bright scarlet dress red shirt bearing a black bowtie just under the chin-hiding a nasty surprise within!-which in turn contrasted nicely with his long black dress pants and matching cuffs. Completing the stylish ensemble, he now wore elegant black gloves with red fingers alongside pointed-toe boots. Those too concealed a trick of their own, one he'd use at his leisure.
Wasn't it marvelous, the difference a few months could make?
Despite his reservations, this particular getup was leagues better than that ghastly tight-fitting tuxedo Vanessa had stuffed him into at the inauguration speech. He'd been too constrained in that attire. This one felt different; whatever the fabric was it remained snug, while allowing for ease of movement. He could tell just by moving in it; he'd be able to run in this, fight in this, laugh in this, and look stylish while doing it.
Now if only he hadn't received this outfit from her of all people.
Miranda Malachite stepped up behind him, pretty as a painting, and pressed her svelte figure against his back.
"See?" she crooned darkly, arms encircling him. "What did I tell you? You'll knock 'em dead. Besides, you tore up your last outfit. This one is far superior to the last," her arm stroked his, drawing a sigh from him as she rambled on. "Not only can it take plenty of punishment, but it won't rip itself to shreds when you move too quickly."
That was a blessing; he'd accidentally given his students quite the show in combat class just last week when his jacket tore itself clean off his shoulders.
Vanessa was still teasing him about that!
"Hmm." he raised a sleeve, considering it anew. "Feels sturdy, yet light. What's it made of?"
The sly matron of the Spiders only winked and kissed the back of his head. "Trade secret, darling."
His smile didn't falter, but it did become a touch strained, as if often did whenever he dealt with her. Their "deal" if one could call it such, still remained in effect after all these months, but at some point it had evolved well beyond that into constant brinkmanship, each vying to one up the other.
He knew it couldn't last forever; but there were time when he wondered if she knew that. She'd been pushing his buttons as of late, and while he did hold some small smidgen of appreciation for her, and even enjoyed their banter at times, she was becoming more trouble than she was worth.
...thanks for the outfit." he tried to step away from her, smile still in place, if only just. "You can put it on my tab."
She hummed and held on, digging her fingernails into his jacket. "Afraid to owe me another favor, darling?"
This bloody spider...!
His right eye twitched ever so slightly as he conjured his many-ringed staff to his hand. Tapping the black rod sternly against the wall made her release him, if only just; and only because she new he wasn't afraid to cause some property damage -or destroy another studio or two- if it meant extricating himself from her wiles.
But today, she surprised him.
Rather than retreat as she always did, this time she hummed and moved in again, latching onto him with more force. He felt her gaze rake across him as jeweler's would a fine diamond, even then he was willing to ignore her...until she opened her fool mouth. "You know, I always wanted to have a headmaster in my pocket...
Kurama creaked an eye open in the back of his mind, teeth bared in a snarl. "Excuse me?"
CRUNCH went the doorknob in Naruto's hand, rendered a mass of crushed brass.
He chuckled once and glanced over his shoulder. "What did you just say?"
A brief flicker of fear flitted across Miranda's mien as she stepped back, but she comported herself well. He'd give her credit for that much. Only four women in this world had seen his smile flicker like this and lived to tell the tale. Raven, Ann, Willow and most recently of all these last few months, Vanessa.
Malachite was yet not among that number.
"Did I stutter?" She sauntered forward, slim hips swinging, easily bringing herself within striking distance once more, utterly unaware of the impending disaster she was courting. "We're in this together, now." she trailed a finger down his chest like a line of poison. "Without me, you wouldn't be standing here now, and I wouldn't have half the influence I do today. That said, I think I'm owed a favor or two, don't you?"
She was trying to get him under her thumb again. Or back in her bed. He wasn't sure which. "Bold of you to assume I owe you anything."
"Maybe," she sashayed past hi and draped herself on the lounge beside him, idly crossing one leg over another. "But we both have our secrets now, don't we? If you don't want yours to get out, mister Headmaster, you'll do what I say."
His smile thinned. Fine, he'd play her little game and give her once more chance. "So you think I owe you...what do you want?
She sneered. "I want you to say it. Admit it; I own you. I MADE you what you are are today. You're mine."
His grin grained an edge, dangerously. "You? Think you own me? Is that your angle, here?"
Don't do it, he willed the thought at her. You're not going to win this game.
Alas, if smile could kill, Miranda would've been ashes long ago.
He waited for her to cross that line; sure enough, she did. "My angle is you, on your knees, kissing my-
The last frying thread of his patience snapped with a snarl. His chakra flared and a golden palm found Malachite's throat, rendering her words a startled gurgle.
"Na-Naruto?!" those bright, poisonous eyes began to bulge, first in shock shock, then fear when he didn't let go."Wait just a second! I was joking! Honest! Ack!" she gasped as he tightened his grip. "You can take a joke, right?!"
Liar, liar, pants on fire. How quickly the tables turned. If she'd shown a bit more spine, and been less of a bitch about it, he might've been impressed.
"If you ever talk to us like that again," Naruto stepped out the dressing room and onto the balcony, bending his fellow blonde over the railing as one might a barrel. "Kurama and I will tear your body apart," in an instant she found herself slammed hanging over the edge, the towering terror that was his partner's vulpine visage looming over her, snarling jaws mere inches from her face, their voices overlapping one another. "Rip your soul out your chest and broadcast your dying screams to every other disrespectful WRETCH who dares to question our abilities. Are we clear?"
Her hands scrabbled at his, desperately trying to pry free the fingers choking her out, to no avail; his grip was ironclad and growing stronger with each passing moment. It was so tempting to just kill her here and now; to simply remove her from the equation altogether. But no...Malachite had her uses.
So long as she knew who was in charge.
"Well?" His fingernails bit into her neck. "Do you understand?"
Miranda gurgled wetly; all her arrogance died an ugly death in that instant. It wasn't enough for hi.
"I'm sorry," he leaned closer, all but pressing his forehead to hers, teeth bared. "I didn't quite catch that." A thumb rose, wiping away a terrified tear from her cheek. "Are. We. Clear?"
Her head bobbed. "C-Crystal...m'sorry."
"Lovely." he loosened his grip, but didn't let go of her. "Now, I seem to have forgotten something. Remind me...whose in charge, here? Was it the Spider? Or the Fox?"
Malachite met his gaze, tried to hold it, failed spectacularly and averted her eyes. "The Fox...
"Sensational." he dragged her back from the edge and threw her down onto the balcony. "Now that we've gotten that messy little matter our of the way once and for all, I've places to be."
"Can we just eat her already?"
Miranda whimpered.
Tempting, but no.
"Now, now, Kurama." He waved a hand back to pat his old friend's head, allowing him to dissipate. "She's too thin. She wouldn't even be a snack to you. We mustn't eat the help...even if she's right, in a sense.
Malachite sputtered, idly rubbing her throat. "I am?"
"Yes, you are. he crooned darkly. "You did aid me." A clawed hand swept under her chin, forcing her to look him in the eyes. "You enabled me, helped me get this far, become who I am now...and pushed me to these depths. I hate you for it, but there's a part of me that loves it all the same. Without you and your meddling, I wouldn't have half the bonds I do now. I have a family now. I'll kill to protect them. Maybe if you stop trying to manipulate me at every turn, I'll count you among their ranks.
Her breath hitched a little; he couldn't tell whether it was from pride of fear. It didn't matter. The result would be the same. If force was the only thing she'd answer to, then he'd show her force.
"I never thought killing would be so easy, I used to balk at it, once, you know?" He pinched her cheeks between his fingers, drawing an annoyed noise from her. "But not anymore. I still feel bad about it sometimes when I go to bed, but it doesn't hurt as much now, you know? Less every day, really. Allow me to thank you for that."
He pressed a finger to her face, just below her jaw, and flared Kurama's chakra, burning the lone digit white hot. She cried out and tried to struggle, but he held her in place, carving a tasteful spiral there. It was as much a mark as a promise.
"You get one more chance." he warned her. "Waste it, and those twin girls of yours will grow up without a mother. Do you understand?
She didn't dare blink, bluster, or even breath.
"You may nod now, Malachite."
Her head bobbed.
"Good talk." he kissed her forehead and drew back with a smile. Always a pleasure to catch up. Hold down the fort for me, won't you? I'm late for a date...
(.0.0.0.)
Vanessa's house was a humble one.
Not to disparage it of course, Naruto found it quite homey; it was a lovely little abode in classic Mistral colors, lots of blues and greens, replete with a nice slate roof and a red door besides. Place looked downright cozy from the outside; someone had even drawn a welcome mat out over the front porch.
In all fairness, he hadn't expected much more than this; huntresses and huntsmen weren't exactly known for renting out palatial palaces. They lived where they could, when they could, by the means they could afford. A single mother who was both a huntress AND rearing a feisty daughter could only afford so much.
.
..
...maybe he ought to help with that. He wasn't exactly lacking funds these days. Vanessa could use a raise.
A quick rap on the door one-two-three announced his presence to those within.
He didn't have to wait long.
"Coming~!" he heard a clamor within before he saw Vanessa coming; she flung the door open in a rush, face flushed, hair askew freed from its customary braid. "I'm sorry, I didn't think you would be this early-oh! is that a new outfit?" her gaze went half-lidded for a moment as she considered him in his red suit. "Mama likes."
"Vanessa."
She recovered quickly with a cough. "I mean, it looks quite nice on you."
Idly he noticed she'd changed her own attire today; swapping out her armor for a pair of snug blue jeans and low-cut scarlet blouse. Well, she could hardly wear armor all the time, but daaaaammmn...
"Like what you see, Headmaster?"
His gaze snapped up, realizing he'd been caught out.
"You can be an insufferable succubus sometimes, you know that?"
"I'm well aware." she took him by the hand. "Won't you come inside? She's waiting for you."
Right, right. He'd almost forgotten; he wasn't hear for her today.
...huh. It really was nicer on the inside, this house of hers.
"Where's Raven and the rest?"
He smiled a little as he removed his shoves at the door. "Took Yang and the kiddos to the park. They'll come by later."
Nikos at least had the good grace to blanch for his sake if nothing else. "Please tell me Raven's wearing a disguise."
"I think Willow convinced her to wear a wig this time around...? Ann was stuffing her into it when I left."
Vanessa winked over her shoulder. "And a dress, I take it?"
His smile became a touch more genuine. "Yuuup."
She giggled a little that. "I'm sure it was quite a sight. A pity you didn't take pictures."
"I'm here now, that's what matters."
"So you are." She took him by the hand and tugged him along, guiding him through the kitchen -he barely had time to notice anything beyond the color, only that it was a strange blend of green and creme- before leading him out to the living room.
"Pyrrha," she sang out, "Look who's here~!"
A child clad in a red onesie awaited them within; carefully ensconced within a playpen, fussing over with building blocks.
Huh. She was about Yang's age, maybe a few months older. Old enough to toddle around, certainly; because the tyke took one look at him and her face lit up. His eyes widened as the little one lurched to her feet with surprising grace for one so young. She really did looking a mini-Vanessa; she was the spitting image of her; from her brilliant red hair down to her glowing green gaze.
And then she floored him with a single word.
"Daddy~!"
Kurama hooted in his head.
Naruto sputtered, balked a bit, and looked to Vanessa for answers.
In response the warrior woman simply plucked Pyrrha from the playpen and set her down at his feet; the moment she did, her daughter lurched into his leg with a giggle and rubbed her face against his knee. He steadied himself quickly and shot her mother a withering glare.
...you've been showing her pictures of me, haven't you?"
"You look a little like her birth father," Vanessa admitted with an indulgent smile. "Not the hair color or the whiskers of course, but a little around the face. He liked to wear red, too."
Something nagged at him. "You never told me his name."
"Maybe someday I will. Go on, now," she nudged him. "Say hello to her."
"Da!" Little Pyrrha reached for him with a whine.
His smile faltered. "Erm, hey kiddo...?"
Pyrrha reached again. "Dada!"
Oh, jeez...
Slowly -carefully!- he reached down for her and scooped her up.
It was different holding a child than a baby; while he didn't have to support Pyrra's head, he did have to keep her steady, and that soon became an effort in and of itself. The girl did not want to hold still! When he finally got ahold of her and held her at chest height, she started squirming, wanting to be closer. On a whim, he tucked her into his chest.
Pyrrha latched onto him and he was lost.
Well, there went the last of his resistance; he could hardly let her go now...
"That's right, dearest." Vanessa stepped in and slid an arm around them both. "This is your daddy. Don't give him trouble, alright?"
Pyrrha's pudgy little face pinched in thought. He could almost see the gears turning in her mind. Surely she wasn't gonna-
Yup. She was gonna.
Sure enough, the rambunctious girl flung up her hands with a giddy giggle. "Twuble!"
Naruto barked a laugh despite himself. She was gonna be handful. He knew it.
Raven and the girls were gonna love her.
A/N: We'll cut it there for today. Would you like weekly updates?
More family moments with everyone are coming up soon, don't you worry~!
Now, then what say you? Would you like a timeskip next chapter? Or should we keep the current pace going? Really need to hear from you here.
RWBY may have been canned by Warner Bros. but we fanfiction writers are out here trying to keep the light alive, as it were. So here we go. The fate of this story depends on you, the reader. Your feedback determines the fate of this tale, and many others.
Feels good to write another chapter for this but as ever, the Embers rule persists. If folks don't like this? Well, I won't continue it. So by all means, speak up! Raise your voice! Make yourself heard! Your reviews matter! Really, they do! That's no joke. I don't have days off anymore -two jobs will do that to you- and I'm working myself to the bone.
So by all means, speak up! Raise your voice! Make yourself heard! Your reviews matter!
That's no joke! I can't write without feedback. Guess that makes me weak...T_T
So in the Immortal Words of Atlas...
...Review Would You Kindly?
And enjoy the previews!
Potential ones at that.
Also, references.(Previews)
Time waits for no man, shinobi, or even a jinchuuriki.
Naruto knew he was no exception to this ironclad rule; even so he found himself somewhat startled by just how quickly it all went by. He settled in as Headmaster of Haven,
Yang grew like a weed, to say nothing of Wess, Winter and...Lie Ren. A son. His never thought he'd have one of those, ya know?
Naturally, there were other surprises to be had...
The woman tilted her hat and saluted. "Anora Valkyrie, at your service~!"
"Anora Valkyrie, eh? Soudns familiar...
"Why're you always smiling? Its scary."
His grin grew. "Let me ask you a question, Winter...what purpose does a smile serve?"
The little Schnee tilted her head. "...I don't know? That's why I asked you."
"Go on," he waved a hand at her and crouched down. "Think about it."
Her pale brow furrowed. "Because it makes you seem strong?
He patted her head.
"Good girl."
"Yang," Weiss slapped a palm to her face. "You are a horrible sibling and I love you."
"Better than Winter?"
"I'm not saying that within earshot."
Phone call for you, sir
hHo you are is immaterial to me; you're even less entertaining than dry cereal.
The man on the other end sputtered spectacularly, black mustache bristling like some great hungry caterpillar. "I'll show you suffering!
The image on the other end crackled; he sneered at it. "Oh, no! Your signal is buffering!"
"I'll destroy you! You little-
The scroll winked out.
"I'm afraid you've lost your signal.
He closed down his scroll, pushed back his chair, and began to hum under his breath.
"Let's begin...
He closed the door behind him and locked it for good measure. The lights were off. He was fairly certain he had left those on.
His finger hovered over the light switch. Paused, now.
Realization dawned.
"Are you going to show your face, or shall we play hide and seek?"
The shadows boiled with movement behind him.
He whirled with a grin. "Hide and seek it is!"
A knife whistled past his face cutting a stray strand of blond hair as it went. He caught the wrist holding it and drove his elbow down into the joint. Aura crackled, creaked, cracked now as navy blue sparks skittered down his attacker slimbs
Oh? Someone who can turn into shadows. That's a nifty semblance.
I know Malachite didn't send you. She's not stupid. Which means you either work for someone else or-
He caught their wrist
...you're a freelancer."
His attacker made an annoyed noise.
"Struck a nerve, did I?"
Yet for all that,
You lack discipline. Control. And worst...you're sloppy."
His fist crashed out and found their face, launching them away.
"Tell you what." he offered them a hand, palm shimmering with golden chakra. "Lets make a deal. You don't attack me, and I don't attack you. Sounds fair, no?"
She eyed his hand like a poisonous asp.
"My dear, I always keep my promises. Its what I do. Who I am. And if I promise to kill you, that's it. You're dead. Done. Destroyed. Shop around; beg, borrow, steal, exhaust every option on this pitiful planet and when all your hope has been wittled down to the very marrow of despair, that's when I'll kill you.
Or we could talk! he flounched into a seat and crossed one leg over another. Would you like that?"
"I wanna fight!"
Naruto rolled over on the couch with a sigh. "Lets not. I'm sleepy.
"Fine. Reeeeeen! Help me tackle Dad!"
A soft sigh was his only warning before the little gremlins jumped him.
"Oi, you. Anyone can apply here, right? And it don't cost nothin'?"
"Quite so!" Naruto whirled, steadfast smile in easily reapplied. "And you are?"
The youth tilted their hat and grinned up at him, revealing a bright eye, selfsure smile and a flash of burning orange hair. "Consider me an...interested party."
"And you are?"
Naruto's head snapped to the side, a sole grunt of pain her only reward.
Bemused blue eyes blazed a baleful red. "You call that a punch?"
Little Yang gulped. "Aw, crapbaskets...
Qrow kept drinking. It kept the pain away.
Fuck Mistral. It took his sister and his niece. Whole damn place could burn for all he cared.
If there WAS a Maiden in Mistral, she was doing a damn good job at keeping her head down. Better than the other ones-
"Watchoutwatchoutwatchouuut~!"
Buzzed or no, Qrow still had a Hunters instinct; he heard the vice and stepped aside with seamless grace; dodged a tiny flash of long, tawny blond hair, watched it kick off a nearby wall and keep running. Lively lilac eyes flashed over her shoulder as she grinned back at him, never once pausing.
"Sorry!" her voice trailed after as she hurtled around the alley and out of sight.
"Bah. Cute kid. He ignored the girl's halfhearted apology and drank deeply from his flask. "Seems familiar...
Blond hair. Lilac eyes. A lively energetic blond girl who was the spitting image of...
Realization clicked. Red eyes bulged.
Booze sprayed the wall.
"Waitaminute!"
EDIT: Hey, thanks for reading!
Feels good to write another chapter for this. Hope you enjoyed it!
So by all means, speak up! Raise your voice! Make yourself heard! Your reviews matter!
Hope you have a great day~!
R&R~!
