Chapter 15: …Dagnamit Kids

"Welcome back Quandale, I got your next task-." "So are we just going to ignore the fact that BILLIONS of innocents died just because it slightly weakens a random figure?" Freeman's usually gentle demeanor degraded into a frown. "Yes, however, let me put this in a way you can see, a few nobodies, or all of reality? Of course I really don't like such a wide scale death, but either way, they all were fated to die, it was just the choice if we bring down more people, more lives." "I understand the threat level that we contend with but couldn't there have been an alternative like perhaps using the power for our side?" "I thought of thousands of scenarios, and I came to a realization of something, there is no way to sever ties that deep without complete destruction. You know, your idea was one of the plans that I thought about implementing, but even if we somehow saved them, would it be a benefit to your reality to have it corrupted just because we can't kill sentients, no matter how bad they are? I appreciate your concern for others, but not everything is fated to last.

However, we must enjoy what things we have before they inevitably fade away. One such thing is art. Your next power you will gain is the ability to draw power from art, it will allow you to boost yourself in any way for a limited period. *Beep* Huh, that's strange, there appears to be some unusual activity somewhere, I'd better get going soon. Anyways, my son, your next job is to eradicate all of the scum that lies deep. I am talking about the Uttp organization. Now I presume that you think that they are limited just on YouTube, but no, they are every 13 year old Roblox ipad kid, the every griefer, and the annoying remmanents that the first phase couldn't take care of. Now I wish you luck on your journey, I hear that figure who I will call "The Anomaly" has begun to ramp up its forces. Be cautious, now farewell, Quandale."

With that, the connection ended. Now the first step was finding them and what better way then using grass. Strolling across the metaverse he found an area with some interesting traffic. The filthy yet slightly damp smell of a troglodyte gave it away. "*BANG BANG BANG* FBI OPEN UP!" "NOO, YOU WILL NOT TAKE MY KITTEN ALIVE!1!" This mountain sized man seemly unfolded from his tiny hut and jumped at the Dinglinator. The sheer force of the attempt caused a 9.0 on the Richter Scale, devastating the landscape, not that it wasn't already destroyed. Of course, Dingle remembered the duck and cover from school, which somehow covered him from all of the effects. "Big guy." Quandale muttered to himself. *Louder voice* Okay I will give you this one try, where is the Uttp headquarters?." "Go suck an egg!" The behemoth replied. "Alright, I wish things could have ended differently for what comes next. No, I don't. *Opens portal and returns with the thing*" What he brought back was a tiny strand of grass. "You know, I feel bad for what the grass has to go through." He than gave the most gentle and tender tap on the man using the delicate grass blade. "ÀÀÀÀAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-" The giant screamed in pain, his very body being melted by the very feel of nature. "PLEASE MAKE IT STOP, I'LL TELL YOU EVERYTHING, ALL I KNOW IS A RINGLEADER IS AT THE YELLOW HOUSE IN THE HILL." "Huh, that's not enough for me, I need more details before I administer this very simple cure." "I-I-I don't know anything else." The giant whimpered now at an eighth of his original size. "Whoops, that was the wrong place." Quandale mocked as the syringe that would cure this fell into the grass. "Promise me that you will take care of my kitten…" And the giant dissolved into nothing. Upon closer inspection, there was a body pillow of a character. Quandale then began walking in the very vague directions given, throwing the pillow in the grass.

Moving into the digitized city thousands of users moved across the landscape. So many different types of designs of avatars, not one person was the same, except for the stans but we don't need to talk about that. Across the buildings there were flying cars (NO WAY) and across the city the billboards were littered with ads, most just for annoying fake mobile game ads or scams. However, one caught his attention, there was an ad about a guy in a light gray shirt wearing a backwards black cap rapping about buying more land in the metaverse or something. He's got to ask about that the next time he meets that stranger. Walking to the suburbs, with pixelated grass with no life in sight, he found a hill with a yellow house. Loading his inventory with pressure cookers, he was ready to siege this place.

"No need for that, Quandale, we were told that you'd be coming here from Tim. Come in." From the door three figures stepped out. Though he couldn't recognize the other two, he easily saw the last one to be Tim Jatthiason the Third. Walking in the rather simple home, he could see the two other figures and how they were wearing unicorn outfits. The one in the blue outfit began speaking. "Hello Quandale, I've heard a lot from you from Tim, I'm Uncle Tom, and the one on my right is Aunt Mariana." Looking closer Quandale could see that time hadn't aged them well, showing white hair and wrinkles, making their outfits the more confusing. "Come now, I got a bucket of chicken." Uncle Tom announced, pulling out a bucket of fried chicken for everyone to share. With all of the missions given, an appetite really formed and nothing could be a stronger temptress than the savory smell of recently fried chicken. The slight butteriness, along with the crisp and savory taste of the chicken and breading really reminded him what there was to fight for. "I bet you couldn't believe how hard that was to get, for some reason so many restaurants closed down, and of course everyone's first reaction was to buy all of the toilet paper, but you wouldn't believe me the priceless reaction they had on their faces when it was all gone, gave me a good laugh I haven't had in so long." Aunt Mariana reminisced while chomping down on drumsticks. Eventually the time would come when everyone was full. "Thought that I would at least entreat you with something before I discuss our plans. And before you ask, if you were sent by a member of their kooky faction, they definitely didn't want you to be seen by us, but now we can help you. The original address given was a trap house where they would to *shudder* unspeakable acts against you. Thank God that you found us instead. However we will turn their trap against them. We've been studying their general structure and we found some weaknesses, Tim, would you like to explain them?" Aunt Mariana stated. "Of course Mariana, as we know, these basement dwellers can feel every vibration outside, and a division of attic parasites also make that flank route not viable, but something that they never have a plan for is someone going in from the front door. When someone enters from there, they all move to the first floor to slowly explore the intruder, from then, we can flank them, capture them, and truly learn about the foundations of this evil organization. Aunt Mariana and Uncle Tom will be the ones to set up the trap, from behind, I will go from the basement. Quandale, are you fine with going via the attic alone?" Jatthiason asked. "I've been going basically solo for nearly all of these missions so I think that I can handle some roaches myself." Quandale responded. "Okay, just wanted to make sure you are fine with that. Now I am going to upload everyone's route into this device I am giving to them and, wait, what's that?" Tim explained before looking into the window to see if they were being watched. "No problem, just a bush. Now, let's get going."

The squad went outdoors and split up. Quandale had a route through the park. Moving out he saw that the bush wasn't there, that's odd. By now the metaverse climate had changed into dark mode, signifying night. Walking through the neighborhood and into the park, the fresh air calmed his nerves. Even during the daytime the park was usually empty, but now the silence of the night accentuated it. Following his route he found a forest planted by an organization funded by a wealthy philantropher. All there was in the forest was the cooling wind, the slight rustle of leaves, and footsteps. "Okay, I swear that the chicken couldn't have made my footsteps this heavy." Quandale thought to himself before stopping. As he stopped, the footsteps stopped. "Okay, someone is clearly tracking me." Quandale heightened his senses, being on a very clear lookout. *Rustle* "GOTCHA" The Dinglinator celebrated as he fired for fifteen seconds at where he heard the rustle come from. Better of all, he heard the sound of something dying, so he must have killed his stalker. Moving closer, he was ready to taunt his spah, a squirrel…"Okay, well that's just one less thing, let's keep moving.," Not even five steps and he pulled out his knife, cutting down a branch that clearly had someone hiding in there. Pulling out his knife he was ready to slash into the intruder, just being a bird that flew away. "Come on. Am I just being paranoid or is something actually going on." This time ten steps before he saw a camera looking at him. Wasting no time he threw a stick, breaking the camera and running at it, tackling it to the ground. "Alright, YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS." The camera was abandoned, it wasn't even recording and there were a few sticks that looked like hands. "IF YOU WANT TO FIGHT AT LEAST DO SO LIKE A MAN!" Quandale screamed while firing wildly at the forest. *beep* "Hello, this is an automated message designed for people who disturb the peace, try not making such sustained noise at such a high level." Out of chances to fight the stalker prematurely, he had to clutch his handcannon machine gun and knife to his chest and be ready for a counter. Worst of all, he was going into the thickest part of the forest before he could leave. Resigned to his fate, he walked through, darting eyes at every branch, every leaf. There were times he swore he could hear the assailant, but upon closer inspection find nothing. Then, the relief came. He made it out of the forest. He made sure to move all of the way out of the forest and into the wide open field. He kept walking carefully.

*Clink* The next moment was a blur, he had a major concussion, only blocking out of instinct a blade. Focusing closer he could feel the slight fuzziness of the blade and see the code particles coming out. Using more reflexes, he catches another bullet and throws it back at a sniper, neutralizing him. Still midnight with no moon, he couldn't see who the figure was, even once he regained focus. All he could tell was it was short and had a slender form. That was all he could get from the many close calls that he barely blocked from this assassin. Quandale managed to find an opening and fired full auto at the figure, but something blasted all of the bullets, practically deflecting them. It then began a counter assault, changing one of its hands into a gun and firing at Quandale, barely slicing through the bullets. Then the assassin rushed at Quandale with its blade so the Dingler also rushed the figure. One exchange later, Quandale could feel an open wound from his face but his slash made a cut into his assassin, slightly revealing its face. He could see almost like a communication was being sent to it and the assassin teleporting away, leaving code particles behind.

"What?" Quandale stood confused from what just happened. He walked closer to the body of the sniper. Of course it was one of those aimbotters. Stealing a health pack from the sniper he limped to a good vantage point from the house. From a camera pad he could see how Aunt Mariana started the bait by knocking on the door. A call came in from Tim "You know, I should film this and call it "Catching a Predator in The Wild." I mean I can see from the inside how all of these filthy troglodytes are slithering with a devious intent. Let's get 'em." After using the med kit, he slipped right past the cameras on the house and found a copper pipe where he scaled up, shattering a window discreetly and making it into the attic. The smell was horrendous, and it should be banned from all uses in general let alone warfare. Cringing, he kept moving past the large piles of waste and finally made it into the second floor. "Okay everyone, these apes have almost made it to the front door, on my beep, we rush them." Sneaking to the stairs past the humming of PC fans he makes it to the first floor where he can see Jatthiason getting directly behind the creatures. *Beep* Quandale begins the execution with many rounds from his handcannon machinegun, the incendiary rounds along with the armor piercing capabilities really did wonders against the blubber of these things. Add on the explosive capabilities and due to their size they were all rocked, stumbling into and crushing each other. Tim sees who he presumes to be the leader and surrounds him with grass.

"NO, not my one chance for someone to clean my dishes, ruined!" The monster roared. Surrounded by grass and pack dead, it was resigned to the interrogations. "Okay, tell us where is your leader's base of operations now." The beast screamed."NEVER I refuse to answer to a furry and a n-" "I'm done playing games." Dingle proclaimed while destroying the structure around it so the beast felt the outdoor air. "NO, the air! I can't handle the FRESHNESS" the monster cried, beginning to suffocate. "Alright, tell me where your leader's operations are and I'll stop the pain." Uncle Tom stated. "WRAAA, all I know is-" "All I know isn't enough, tell me everything or you will face the same fate as your entire section." "No, not big John as well, okay, okay! Underground base, here is their address, this is who the leader looks like, I can see the fire, PLEASE SAVE ME!" The ringleader pleaded. With a nod, they took some of the debris and covered the beast up.