Breathing exercises are one of the simplest and easiest activities you can practice to reduce symptoms of nervousness, such as slowing your heart rate, improving oxygen exchange, and reducing the 'fight, flight, or freeze' response. Channel your nervous energy into positivity.

That's what Stella has been trying to channel all week. Her therapist in LA taught her how to do the breathing exercises when she feels nervous, anxious, and overwhelmed. She learned that every negative situation can be turned into a positive one by channeling her energy.

She did yoga and meditation every day; it's helped wonderfully over the past year.

After laying Ryan down, she got her yoga mat and rolled it out in the middle of the living room. She got in a cross-legged, seated position and turned on her yoga music. She took a deep breath as she prepared herself. She does this every day, sometimes twice a day, when she is really feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Today she is feeling a mixture of nervousness and anxiety, and she is extremely overwhelmed with worry.

She had plans with Kelly tonight; it's been a week since he asked her why she ghosted everyone. She was able to convince him to give her some time; she promised him that once the house got done and she got moved in, she would have him over and they would have a little confession session. She promised to answer all his questions, and now that the day was here, her emotions are all over the place. So she needed to meditate and get herself under control. She knows he will be asking the same two questions she was unable to answer last week.

"One, two, three breathe in." She inhaled for a few seconds and then exhaled. "Three, two, one."

"What are you doing?" Shay asked, walking into Stella's house.

"Meditating."

"Cool." She said as she sat down beside Stella in the same position. "Why do people do this?" She asked as she copied what Stella was doing.

"When we meditate, we inject far-reaching and long-lasting benefits into our lives. It helps you understand your pain, lower your stress, connect better, improve focus, and reduce brain chatter. And it helps you have an awkward conversation with your ex."

Shay laughs. "Stop stressing about tonight; it's going to be fine."

"I wish I was as positive as you are."

"Stella, I don't understand why you're so worried. This past week, you and Kelly spent practically every day together other than the two days he was on shift. You guys seem to be really getting along; he remodeled your kitchen.

"Hey! I helped."

"Okay, you guys remodeled the kitchen together; he power washed the house for you; he fixed the deck out back; and the busted window."

"He put Ryan's crib together and his dresser, along with a few other things, last night."

"He was here last night?"

"Yeah, he put together a toy box chest my mom ordered for Ryan and a few bookshelves."

"Did he spend the night?" She asked with a smug look.

Stella rolled her eyes. "Yes, he did; it was after one this morning when he finished the second shelf, and I told him he could crash on the couch." Shay gave her a yeah-right look. "He did; I slept in my room with the door shut."

"Hmm... Shay studied her. "And nothing happened between you two?"

"No!"

"Hmmm." She still didn't buy it; she knows how they are.

"Shay trusted me; nothing is going to happen between me and Kelly; that's all in the past."

Shay stared intensely at her, trying to read her vibes. "Do you still love him?"

"Shay, we have been broken up for eight years; trust me, there is nothing between us anymore."

"Again, do you still love him?"

Stella gives her an irritated look. "I..." Ryan cries out. "I need to go get my son," she said happily.

Shay laughs, "Saved by the baby crying." She walks behind Stella to Ryan's room. She smiles watching Stella pick up Ryan. "Oh, look at the little baby firefighter hat." She said as noticed the hat sitting on the dresser.

Stella smiled. "Kelly gave it to him yesterday." She laid Ryan down on the changing table.

"Aww..." Shay's face lit up. "That was so...

"Don't start!" Stella warned her, noticing the giddy look in her eyes. "It's just a hat; it doesn't mean anything; do not read into it." She tells her as she starts changing Ryan.

"Severide would make a great stepdad."

"I'm not looking for a stepdad, Shay; I am all my son needs." She smiles down at the little boy. "Right baby? You and me against the world, huh?" She kisses his forehead. "Mama loves you."

Shay smiles as she watches her friend with her son. "Yes, you are, but it couldn't hurt to have Severide around. He's such a great handyman."

"I am very grateful for everything he's done this week."

"He could be your personal handyman." She smirks. "A handyman that can fix anything, including checking your engine with his dipstick."

"I'm ignoring you." She says blushes.

She turns her attention back to Ryan. "All done; now let's see if you're hungry." Stella picks him up and grabs a blanket.

They walk back out to the living room, and she walks to her grandma's rocking chair. "Kelly was able to fix my grandma's chair too." She tells her as she sat down. She unbuckled her shirt.

"Severide can fix anything." She told her as she sat down on the couch. "Just make sure he does the work shirtless; I know how you love watching his muscles flex."

Stella rolled her eyes. "Aunt Shay is being crazy." She tells the wide-eyed baby, and she adjusts him so she can place her nipple in his mouth. He quickly started sucking.

"Damn, he loves sucking on breast as much as I do." She chuckled. "I bet Kelly liked the show." She teased.

"There was no show; yes, he was here when I had to feed him, and he was a gentleman."

"Trust me, he was staring." She laughs. "He was probably thinking, damn, that baby is lucky."

"Shut up." She shakes her head and looks down at Ryan.

"I'm just saying they got bigger, and he's probably wishing he could have taste."

"I swear, if I wasn't feeding my son right now, I'd throw my shoe at you."

"Hey, don't get upset with me, because your sexual frustration from being in the same room with Severide again."

"I'm not sexually frustrated; sex is the last thing on my mind."

"Sure it is." Shay stands. "I can feel the sexual tension in the room when you're together."

"There is no sexual tension; there is tension between us, but not sexually." She strokes Ryan's cheek. "I'm afraid that tension might boil over tonight, and it scares me."

"Stop stressing; everything will be okay. Just be honest with him, like you were with me a few nights ago."

"But it's easier with you." She looks down at Ryan. "I can talk to you about anything."

"You used to be able to talk to Kelly about anything too."

"Yes, but things changed after the breakup."

Shay kneels in front of her. "I know things were rocky when you first came home, but things between you two are better now, right?"

"It's not about things being better between us; it's about talking about the past, bringing up old memories, and reliving the pain. When I first decided to move back home, I figured the only person who would even talk to me was my mom."

"Why?"

"Because I hurt you guys, I never thought you and I would pick up like no time had passed."

"True friendship knows no distances." She squeezes her knee. "I will always be here for you."

Stella smiled. "Expect tonight when I need you."

"Stella, ...

"I'm just playing." She said cutting her off. "I am really happy for you and Foster. I want you to go and enjoy your anniversary weekend. Don't worry about me; I will be fine."

"I am going to worry about you, and I want you to call me after Kelly leaves tonight. Well, if he leaves tonight." She smirks, wiggling her eyebrows.

Stella kicked her. "Knock it off; nothing is going to happen between us." She closed her eyes. "I'm afraid that tonight will be the last time we talk; I don't think Kelly is going to understand the way you did. And... I'm still not able to talk about Ryan's father; I know that's going to be one of his questions."

Shay thought for a moment. "Stella, you tell him what you feel comfortable telling him. Ryan's father is not mine or Kelly's business. If you don't feel comfortable talking about his father, then don't. Kelly will get over it."

Stella caresses Ryan's cheek. "My therapist said I needed to tell someone; she said it could help me heal, especially if it's someone I trust, but..." She trails off as her tears fall. "I'm so afraid of being judged and people not understanding why I did what I did."

Shay watches her closely. "Fuck em; let people think what they want to think. That's what's wrong with this world: people are too judgmental and constantly putting their two cents in other people's business. They should worry about the skeletons in their closets instead of other peoples."

Stella wiped her eyes. "I want to tell you, but I'm not ready yet."

"Honey, that's your choice; it doesn't matter to me if you ever tell me. But when or if you ever decide you want to, I will not judge you or force my opinion on you. I will listen and be your friend."

Stella smiled. "Thank you."

Shay kissed her forehead. "Well, I should get going; I still haven't packed yet."

"You are still a last-minute person, huh?"

"Yep, I'm never going to change." She laughs. "Look, if Kelly does flip out on you, call me, because I'll fly back and beat some sense into him." She smiles, but Stella could tell she was being serious.

"I got this." She assured her. "You go and have a great weekend with your girlfriend, and don't worry about me."

Shay kissed her cheek. "I will always worry about you; it's my job as your best friend."

"I thought I was your best friend." Kelly said, walking into the house.

"Didn't your mama teach you how to knock?" Shay asked, giving him a raised brow.

"You didn't knock." Stella said, standing up slowly.

"That's besides the point; I'm your best friend."

"Grandma is here." Janet said, walking into the house.

"Apparently no one knocks anymore." Stella said sarcastically.

"I'm the grandma; I don't have to knock." Janet told her daughter as she walked over to her. "There's grandma's boy." She said taking the baby out of Stella's arms. "Are you ready to spend some time with Grandma?"

"Ryan's going to your mom's?" Shay asked surprisedly.

"Yeah, she wanted him to spend the weekend with her."

Shay's face lights up. "Hmm interesting." She gave Stella a thumbs up and a huge grin.

Stella knew exactly what she was suggesting. "Bye, Shay, have a safe flight." She narrowed her eyes at her.

"Fine, I'm out." She said, walking towards the door. "Now you two behave, and don't do anything I wouldn't do." She winks at Stella.

"Get out!" Stella replied with a smile.

Kelly looked between the two of them, confused as hell. "What was that about?"

"Nothing, Shay being Shay." She laughs and walks to Ryan's room. Leaving Kelly standing there more confused.

"Kelly, can you hold him for a second, so I can answer my phone?"

"Sure." She placed Ryan in his arms and grabbed her phone, walking away.

Kelly smiled down at the wide brown-eyed baby. "Hey buddy." He said as he started rocking him softly. He's spent a lot of time here this past week helping Stella out with repairs, but this is the first time he held her son. It still hurts knowing she has a son; this was supposed to be their son, not just hers. He gets a little emotional and jealous of the man she decided to have a baby with; he has so many questions about his father. But he doesn't want to ask, because honestly, with bits and pieces of information that have been shared by Stella and Janet, he's got a pretty good idea of what happened, and he doesn't want to push her into telling him something she doesn't want to talk about.

"You got your mom's hazelnut brown eyes, her black curly hair, and her nose." He touches his nose. "You got a pretty awesome mom."

Stella walked back into the living room and froze her eyes, taking in Kelly holding her son. This was not something she expected to happen. She noticed the grin on his face as he looked down at Ryan. She had to fight back her tears that so desperately wanted to fall as she continued watching them.

Her heart was aching with happiness and regret. She loved seeing Kelly bond with Ryan, but she hated that he was probably thinking about what could have been if she wasn't such a dumbass and broke up with him. That day replays in her mind all the time, and she would do anything to relive that day. To go back and change things.

Flashback: 8 years ago

Stella was on the set for sixteen hours and just wanted to come home and sleep for the whole weekend. But she knew Kelly would be offended because he came to town to spend the weekend with her, and if she slept all weekend, that would just add to the fire of problems they were already having.

Things between the two seem to be coming apart at the seam.

She walks through the door and sighs. Kelly was lying on her couch, sleeping, which means he was upset with her again. It's crazy how they've been fighting the last two months; they never fought before; they had disagreements, but never fights that led to screaming or ghosting each other.

Kelly said she has changed; she is becoming more career-driven. And he felt she was pushing him away. She told him he's crazy; she's just been busy. It wasn't a lie; she is extremely overwhelmed with all her acting gigs and the modeling job she took on the side. She was making really good money; she was nowhere near making million dollar money, but she was happy with what she had rolling into her bank account.

She didn't want to fight, so she left him sleeping and went to her room. She changed clothes and quickly got in bed. She felt a tad bit guilty for not waking him up. But she just wanted sleep, not an argument.

She was woken by lips on her neck and a hand slipping into her panties. She was exhausted but she missed his hands on her, so she laid there with her eyes closed as he fingered her softly. She opened her legs wider, giving him better access. She moved slightly, so she was on her back. Her eyes open to his intense blue eyes staring at her. She smiled up at him, reached up, and touched his face. "It's been so long." She whispered as her tiny orgasm hit her.

"I know, baby." He kneeled beside her and took his shirt off.

She bit her lip, she loved her man shirtless he kissed her softly, before removing her panties, he then brought her up just a tap to remove her nightie, she laid back down, spreading her legs, as he adjusted himself between her legs. "I love you." He whispers as he enters her.

She immediately wrapped her legs around his waist, needing to feel him deeper. "I love you too, so much." She wrapped her arms around his back. Holding him close to her, she kisses him as he starts moving in and out of her. No words were spoken, just soft moans of pleasure as they make love. Neither knowing that this was going to be their last love making together.

Stella awoke to the smell of bacon, she smiles as she hears her boyfriend humming from the kitchen. She really misses him, and wishes things weren't so off between them. They loved each other, there's no question about that, but the distances between them was starting to affect their relationship. And making things extremely hard for them not to acknowledge it.

"Good morning beautiful!" Kelly said, walking into the room. Carrying a tray of food.

Stella sat up. "Good morning." She replied as her eyes scan his body. He was wearing just his black boxers, the attraction was still hot between them, they couldn't keep their hands off each other when they did see each other, that is.

He places the tray over her lap, and then placed a kiss on her lips.

"Thank you babe." She tells him as she looks at the pancakes, and bacon he fixed for her.

"Oh I forgot the coffee, I know you need your caffeine." He jokes as he turns to walk out the room.

"I drink it black."

"What?"

"My coffee, I drink it black now."

"You've always drunk it with cream and two sugars."

"I know, but black coffee is healthier, and I like it."

"Okay." He turns to walk out of the room.

She picks up her fork and stares at the food, knowing that his simple little loving gesture was going to turn into an argument.

"Here you go." He hands her the mug.

"Thank you." She takes a sip and puts her mug on the tray.

He reached over and squeezed her exposed breasts, which were out there begging to be touched. "I miss waking up with you."

She gave him a soft smile. "I miss it too."

He kisses her tenderly and nibbles on her neck. "Are you hungry?" She asked as his mouth covered her nipple.

"I'm planning on eating my favorite pie as soon as you get done."

"Thank God.". She closes her eyes. "I've missed your tongue."

"I've missed your taste." He says as he pulls back. "Eat up; you're going to need the energy for what I have planned."

"I can't wait." She pecks his lips, then looks down at the food.

"What's wrong?" He asked, noticing her facial expressions.

"Nothing." She lied.

"Don't lie to me; what's wrong with the food?"

She sighed heavily, knowing he was going to take what she says the wrong way. "I only eat turkey bacon now, because

"It's healthier." He finished for her, laughing bitterly. "What's wrong with the pancakes?"

"I'm watching my sugar intake and counting my calories and carbs. The syrup is loaded with sugar in...

"Since when did you start worrying about carbs?"

"It's just my PR people said that I need to maintain my weight, and you know they say the camera adds ten pounds and...

"You have got to be kidding me." He stands up. "I guess that means you don't like pizza, chocolate, nachos, or tacos; you know, stuff you used to love."

"I still love those things, but I would rather have a healthier option." He picks up the tray. "Kelly, what are you doing?"

"Throwing it out, you don't want it." He walks out of the bedroom. "Hell, I don't know what you eat anymore; guess I shouldn't have gone grocery shopping for you."

Stella was stunned. "You went shopping for me?" She asked as she got out of bed and grabbed her robe. "Why would you do that?" She followed him out of the room.

"Why? Because you had no food in your fridge and your cabinets are full of out-of date stuff, hell, the milk in your fridge expired last week."

"I would have gotten around to going to the store and cleaning out my fridge, but right now I've been to

"Busy!" He yelled. "I know." He slammed down the tray. "You're always busy; it's why we haven't seen each other in two months; it's why you can't return phone calls or answer your damn phone when I call you...

"I call you back, and I do answer when you call."

"Yeah, long enough to say Hey! I'm in a meeting or I'm on set, I'm at important event. I will call you back. Then you hung up and never called back."

"I do call you back, Kelly." She yelled back.

"Ha! Nine times out of ten, you don't." He fired back. "It's like you don't even have a boyfriend; excuse me, fiance. Wait, are you still my, fiance, because I'm not sure anymore?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You don't wear the ring."

"Because of

"Work, I know."

"Where is this coming from? Are you that upset because I've changed a few of my eating habits?"

He laughs bitterly again. "Seriously, you think your decision to start eating better is what this is about?"

"I don't know what to think." She told him honestly; the heated glare in his eyes told her that what they've been avoiding was now unavoidable.

"I love you, Stella." His tone was so sincere and laced with so much affection. "I do, so much." The tears in his eyes brought her to tears. "We've been engaged for two years now, and we still haven't set a date or even really talked about planning our wedding. Gabby and Matt got engaged six months ago, and they get married next month."

"We're not Gabby and Matt, Kelly. They want to rush it; that's them. We wanted to wait.

"No, you wanted to wait; had it my way, we would be married by now."

"Kelly, I can't get married yet...

"I know, it's all about your career." He sighed. "I want the marriage, the kids—I want it all with you, Stella. And you don't want what I want; we are on two totally different pages."

"I do, but not right now." She cried.

"When?"

She shrugs and leans up against the wall. "I don't know, maybe in a few years or ten."

His eyes widen. "Ten years?" That felt like a punch in the stomach. "You want me to wait ten years to start our lives together?"

"People have long engagements all the time." She watches as he shakes his head in disbelief.

"Not that long." He walks over to the window, looking out at the view of the ocean. "Tell me this: what if, in ten years, your career isn't where you want it to be? Then what?"

"Are you saying I won't be successful in ten years?"

"That's not what I'm saying...

"It sure in hell sounds like it to me." She walks over to where he was standing.

"Don't do that!" He warned her as he turned to face her, his eyes narrowing at her. "I have always supported you, Stella; since the day you first told me you wanted to be an actress, I still supported you after we became a couple too."

She sighed. "I know." She says in a regretful tone.

"Do you have any idea how bad I wanted to say? Don't go stay with me." He turned back around, looking out the window. "I thought the first year of us being apart was going to be the hardest. We practically spend every day together, give or take a day or two, since we were like twelve. And then all of a sudden you weren't going to be a part of my everyday life, and that thought cut deep. But we communicate every day, constantly. You called me, and I called you. We video chat pretty much every few hours. Not being able to be with you physically sucked. But I got to see you through the video chats, hear your voice, and hear about your day. You used to call me all the time; I was your go-to person. If you were having a good day, you called me. If you were having a bad day, you would call me; sometimes you would call me just because you missed me, I miss those calls the most."

She crossed her arms around herself. "You're still my person. I love you, Kelly."

"I know." He said it in a defeated tone. "We've been together for seven years—seven pretty remarkable years. But these last six months, I feel things have taken a drastic turn. And

"We're not the people we used to be." She said cutting him off.

He turned around, looking at her intensely. "We are still those people; we just lost track, and we need to get back on track. We belong together, and we need to

"Take a break."

His eyes widen. "No!" He yelled. "That's not what I am implying."

"Kelly, I think we should take some time."

"Time apart, seriously. We are apart now; this is the first time I've seen you in two months. We need to spend more time together; we need to reconnect with each other. These past six months, something happened between us, and I don't like it." He walked over to her, placing his hands on her hips. "I'm moving to LA."

Her eyes widened in surprise. "Kelly...

"I don't want to hear it, Stella. I can't keep living like this. I need to be with you. I know your work schedule is crazy and that you travel a lot. But just think how amazing it would be when you come home from them long trips and I'm here to help you unwind and relax."

"Kelly, you can't just uproot your life."

"Yes, I can. I want to be where you are; I can be a firefighter here."

She pulled away, looking down at the floor; she couldn't look him in the eyes. She couldn't watch his heartbreak. "I don't want you to move here."

"Why?"

"I just don't think it's a good idea." She looks up at him, seeing the questionable look he is giving her. "I'm headed to Nashville for six weeks, then Miami for a bit, and after that, who knows?"

"Nashville? You never said anything about going to Nashville. Why are you going to Nashville?"

"I told you my agent has me scheduled all over the place with new projects and stuff. I'm taking whatever they give me; I need to get myself out there as much as possible if I plan on making it big. So I don't see the point of you moving here when I won't be here the majority of the time. We still wouldn't see each other."

He rubs the back of his neck as he thinks about things. "We will make it work like we always do." He says even though he doesn't know how anymore, it feels like he's in a one-sided relationship.

Stella could see how hurt he was; this wasn't supposed to happen to them. Her mind wanders off to Julie, who told her that being single is the best way to make it in this industry. Single, was definitely not what she wanted, but why string Kelly along when there's a chance she'll never be ready for marriage or kids? And in that moment, she knew what she had to do; it was going to break her in the process. "I think we are at different junctions right now, and the best thing for us to do." She felt her heart breaking as she tried to say the words she never thought she would say, at least not to Kelly; they were supposed to be together forever. "Is to take a break from each other." She held her tears back, which was hard because she could feel his gaze on her.

"A break?" He questioned. "Stella I don't want to take a break." He pulled her into his arms. "I don't want to live this life without you. We will figure it out; we have to; we are written in the stars."

She lay her head on his shoulders, enjoying the warmth of his embrace; her eyes were burning from keeping her tears in; she knew she had to do whatever she could to get him to go; letting him go was the right thing to do. She loves him so much that she wants him to be happy; she wants him to have the life he wants—the life she can't give him. "I don't want to do this anymore."

He pulled back, looking at her with so much confusion and hurt echoing in his eyes. "I can't do this anymore; I need to focus solely on my career and nothing else. I think it's time I fly solo and find my place in this world without you."

His arms drop, and she steps back. She swears she heard his heart break. "I love you, Kelly Severide, and I always will, but I need to be single for a bit and find myself...

"Are you really doing this?" His words interrupt her, as the tears start falling down his face.

"It's what's best for us; I know you don't understand right now, but one day you will and maybe...

"I want my ring back." He said it angrily, interrupting whatever she was going to say.

She was a bit surprised by that request. "Okay." She walks to her bedroom. Slowly, she feels like her legs are going to give out. She can't believe she's doing this. Why is she doing this? She needs him, but Julie said he was slowing her down; he wasn't allowing her full-star potential to show. She opened her jewelry box and took out the ring—a ring she promised to never take off her finger. A ring she hasn't worn in months.

He walks into the room behind her and watches her stare at the ring. "Everyone said I was crazy for spending half my savings on that ring, and I told them my girl was worth it." He walked over to his bag and started putting his clothes on. "Guess they were right; it was a waste of money and you were a waste of my time."

Stella just stood there, paralyzed from what she caused. He took the ring from her hands. "Maybe I'll meet someone who actually wants to wear it." He huffed as he walked out of her bedroom quickly.

Stella stood there with her eyes closed tightly. She jumped when she heard the front door slam, and that was the moment she hit her knees and mentally cussed herself out for what she did. She promised to never hurt him, and that's what she just did. She just pushed away the most important person in her life—her biggest supporter, her biggest fan, the love of her life. What the hell did she just do?

End of flashback

"Stella... Stella."

She shook her head. "What?" She asked, she clearly zoned out for a minute.

"Are you okay?" Kelly asked, giving her a concerning look.

"Yeah, just thinking." She walks over to him, staring at her sleeping son in his arms. He looked good holding a baby; this baby should be theirs; they should be watching their baby sleep, not hers, and some random dude who... Nevermind, she tells herself, let's not go there. She knows this is hard on him, especially how badly he wanted to be a dad, and especially since she told him that she didn't want to be a mom. She can only imagine what is going on inside his mind, thinking she didn't want to have a child with him but she had another man's baby.

Janet stopped in the doorway and stared at her daughter standing next to Kelly, holding her grandson. She smiled; this was a picture-perfect moment. She quickly snapped a few pictures before Stella noticed.

"Mom! What are you doing?" Stella gave her a displeasured look.

"Nothing," she lied. "Kelly, my grandson looks very comfortable in your arms; he seems so content, which means he likes you and trusts you."

"It does?" Kelly looked up at Janet.

"Yeah, believe me, if he wasn't a happy baby, he would be screaming his lungs out."

Kelly smiled and looked down at the baby nested in his arms. "He's adorable, and I'm definitely a sucker for those brown eyes." He looks over at Stella. "He's got your eyes, hazelnut deep soulful eyes." They held their gaze for a long moment.

Janet getting happier by the minute. "Well, me and my grandson are going to get going. So you two can start your date?"

"It's not a date, mom!" Stella said it hostilely.

"Is there food involved?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" She was getting irritated with Mom.

Janet took Ryan from Kelly's arms. "I'm just curious."

"Yeah, we were going to order food and talk about some stuff." Kelly said after realizing Stella wasn't going to respond.

"Hmm. I thought so." Janet coed.

"What does that mean?"

"That sounds like a date to me; that's what it meant."

"Well, it's not a date." Stella walked over to the hallway and picked up Ryan's bag. "Stop assuming shit." She walks toward the door. "Kelly, I'll be right back going to walk my mother to the car."

"Okay." He smiled amusingly. He knew Janet was under Stella's skin. He used to love watching them go head-to-head over everything. And then comfort Stella to calm her down. He stood nervously and waited for her to return. He noticed a picture on the end table; it was of Stella, Ryan, and Shay. He kind of wished he was in there somewhere.

"Sorry, about her." Stella said, walking back into the house. She looks at Kelly, her nerves kicking in. They are alone; they haven't been alone yet. Shay or Ryan are normally with them; she felt her stomach doing flip-flops.

"She still gets under your skin, huh?" He jokes. Trying to ease the awkwardness that was now surrounding them.

"Yep, I love her, but sometimes I want to choke her." She laughs. "Working with her is the worst, I need a new job. Causing working with your mother is never a good idea."

"It's a good thing my mom isn't a firefighter huh." He jokes, and she laughs nervously.

He slips his hands into his pockets; he feels more nervous than he thought he would. They spent the week together; he even slept on her couch, but for some reason, his nerves were shot.

"Umm, so what are you craving?" She asked as she sat down on the couch.

"Craving?" He questioned confusedly. Looking her up and down, he doesn't know how but somehow she has gotten more beautiful.

"Food wise, I was going to order food."

"Oh!" He replied. "Umm, whatever you want." He wasn't really hungry; he just wanted to get answers.

"Okay, some Chinese."

"Sounds good."

She pulled out her phone and asked, "What happened to that Mr. Biggs restaurant bar the one... She stopped talking as the realization hit her.

"Where we had our first date at?" He finished for her. "The place where I told you I loved you for the first time."

She looks down at her phone, hating that she just made things more awkward.

"It burned down a few years ago; the owner said he was just too old to start over, so he cut his ties and moved to Florida."

"Wow!" She said. They shared tons of memories there; it was her favorite place.

"He told me his last day here when the wind blew you back to Chicago because he was sure one day you would be back. I told him he was wrong." She looks up at him. "There was nothing left in Chicago for her." His eyes narrowed at her, and she swallowed hard. "He said, Kelly, my boy, the love you two shared is still there; give her time; she'll find her way back to you. He joked and said, When she does, call me, and I'll cater your wedding for free." He walks over to the fireplace. "I told him, don't be looking forward to that phone call, because she's never coming back here; she didn't leave anything here."

"That's a lie." He turns and looks at her with a raised brow. And before she could even think about what she was going to say, the words flew out of her mouth. "I left my heart here; my heart never left you Kelly."

He wasn't expecting that, and what she said next surprised him more.

"I know this awkwardness that's between us is my fault. I think about that night we broke up all the time; it's burned in the back of my mind. You gave me all your love, and all I gave you was goodbye. I'm sorry for breaking your heart. I'm sorry for pushing you away and making you think I didn't want a future with you. The day I lost you, I lost myself. And I only have myself to blame for that; I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't."

He turns away from her, stunned that she just apologized. He's been waiting for an apology from her. His eyes scanned the pictures on her fireplace manual. She must have just put the pictures out this morning because he doesn't remember seeing them this past week. He sees a picture of her in the hospital, holding Ryan. His eyes glaze over.

"I let my PR team and my agent get into my head."

He doesn't look at her. "What do you mean?"

"They suggested for me to get more roles and bigger projects that I should let you go; that industry is more flexible with single women." She looks down at the floor. "They told me that getting married and starting a family would be a bad move for my career and that I needed to get established first and wait at least

"Ten years?" He finished for her, remembering that conversation from eight years ago.

"Yeah, I thought I was doing your favor."

"Ripping my heart out of my chest was doing me a favor."

She stares at the back of his head. "I figured once you got over the sting of me hurting you, that you would find someone else who could give you what you wanted and

"I wanted you, Stella; that's all I wanted."

"Yes, long with the wife title and kids. Something I wasn't prepared for, I told you I didn't want kids, and

"Apparently you lied because you wanted kids; you just didn't want them with me." He interrupted her. "Actions speak louder, Stella."

She stood up; her rage was close to boiling over. "It wasn't a lie, Kelly. I wasn't sure if I wanted kids. I was confused and thinking about my career and how having kids could hurt my career. It had nothing to do with not wanting to have kids with you, and what the hell does action speak louder mean? What actions did I take that...

"You had a baby with another man." He yelled, cutting her off. "Ryan should have been our baby, not you and some...

"I was raped!" She screamed. "I was raped last year." She took a deep breath. "Ryan wasn't expected; he wasn't planned; he wasn't wanted. He wasn't made out of love; he was made because some man dragged me down a dark alley and raped me." She gasps. "Oh my God!" At the realization of what she just said. Her stomach was in knots, her heart was pounding as an uneasy feeling washed over her.

Kelly's protection mode kicked in, and he wrapped her in his embrace as she cried. Honestly, he was starting to piece things together a couple of days ago. With what Janet said and the little remarks Stella has made, he figured something happened, but rape was last on the list. "I'm sorry Stella." He held her tightly.

"People don't understand." She clung to him. "Why I kept the baby after something so traumatic?" She looks up at Kelly. "That little boy saved me, Kelly; he saved my life." She cries harder. "I wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for him."