Chapter XI

(Maura)

The warmth on my face wakes me, and I open my eyes, which immediately proves to be a mistake. The glaring sunlight streaming through my bedroom window nearly blinds me, or so it feels for a brief moment.

I groan and try to turn over, only to realize I can't move. I'm lying on my stomach, my hands buried under the soft pillow supporting my head. Jane, on the other hand, is half draped over and half beside me, one leg bent and resting on my thighs, just below my hips. Her head is on the pillow above my right elbow, and her left arm is loosely wrapped around my torso.

My eyes close again. I can feel her steady breaths on my neck and the heat radiating from her body. Usually, I wake up feeling cold in the morning, but today I relish the luxury of my personal heater.

I know I should get up; I still have four autopsy reports to write. But Jane's naked upper body on my bare back sends a delicious tingle through me, filling me with a rare sense of calm.

I indulge in this precious moment for a few more minutes, dozing lightly.

Maybe she'll run away again today and take another piece of my heart with her. But at least I'll have enjoyed every moment I got to spend with her.

I turn my head, bringing my forehead to hers.

"Sweetheart, I need to get up." It's only a whisper, accompanied by a feather-light kiss.

I hold the contact for a moment until she opens her eyes and gives me that bedroom look that makes my heart skip a beat.

"Morning, Maur."

Oh my God, that look combined with her sultry voice are my undoing. I can already feel the desire rising within me again.

(Jane)

I've been awake for a while and noticed Maura was awake too. For a brief moment, I was shocked and thought I was in my own bed with Casey. But Maura's soft skin and her unmistakable scent made it unnecessary to even open my eyes to check.

I savor the feeling of being so close to her and manage to push away all the nagging and biting thoughts. In her presence, life seems so simple, so clear.

I slept better than I have in a long time, and just as I'm about to drift back into sweet darkness, I feel her delicate lips lingering on mine.

I open my eyes and greet her, seeing the seductive smile and dangerous sparkle in her eyes.

Never has anyone had me so wrapped around their finger like she has, so that a single glance could ignite an irresistible desire to be with them.

"You have no idea how much I want you," I whisper, kissing her slowly and tenderly while my left hand glides over her bare body.

I can feel her smiling and hear her whispered response between our moist kisses.

"Show me."

I break our close contact for a moment to adjust my position, which earns a sound of disapproval from Maura. This quickly turns into a surprisingly loud moan as I press my left leg against her center and then almost entirely cover her with my body, sucking on her neck.

I can feel how wet she already is as she rubs against my leg, clearly trying to bring herself to climax.

Quickly, I grab the unnecessary pillow and lift her hips slightly to slide it underneath. In one smooth motion, I thrust my index and middle fingers into her, increasing the pressure with each thrust using my leg.

"Oh Fuuuuck, Jane…"

I know this might take her a bit longer, but her verbal outbursts and the unmistakable, rhythmic movements of her hips are enough motivation to ignore the burning in my arm muscles.

I pull her up into a kneeling position and massage her breast with my left hand. A few thrusts later, she stumbles into the longest orgasm I've ever witnessed – though there haven't been that many.

I fall to the side and pull her with me. For minutes, we both gasp for air, our bodies intertwined as we lie spooning in bed.

I bury my face in her hair and take a deep breath, while she snuggles so close to me it's as if she wants to crawl under my skin.

"Everything okay, love?" Although I've never been a fan of nicknames, it sounds so endearing and gentle coming from her that the logical arguments I had against it months ago have all but vanished.

"More than okay," I reply with a smile, accompanied by a final, lazy kiss on her left shoulder.

(Maura)

When I wake up again, my alarm clock tells me it's already 11 AM. Along with the slight shock, I immediately miss the warmth of Jane's body. I turn and see that the bed next to me is empty.

Panic and sorrow rise within me, making it almost impossible to breathe. Has she left me again? Just now, when I thought I had finally gotten closer to her. I don't know how many more times I can play this game. My heart seems to shatter into a million pieces each time, and she's taking a few pieces with her everytime she leaves me. I don't know how many more times I can piece together the remaining fragments before it breaks me completely. I don't know how much more I can give her before only she can heal my broken heart.

Maybe it's already too late. Maybe she's already taken too much of me.

I cry bitterly, pressing my hands to my chest. It hurts so much that I almost irrationally feel like my heart is shattering.

I can hardly breathe as the gut-wrenching sobs shake me and tears stream down my cheeks.

I want to sleep, to close my eyes and not open them again until this unbearable pain of loss has passed.

I feel naked and vulnerable, exposed, left behind. I feel humiliated and used.

I curl up tightly, almost in a fetal position, as I weep and sob, struggling with the anguish.

Why does she do this to me? Why does she leave me like this again? What did I do to deserve this treatment?