Lord Give Me Strength (High School DxD Exorcist SI Chapter 1)
Getting a girlfriend is overrated.
Okay, maybe that was a bit of an overreaction. Sure, it's nice when they're someone that just clicks with you. Someone you can just hang out with, even just sitting in the same room, while each doing their own thing. That comfortable silence... honestly when compared to the loneliness I'm used to, yeah, it's hella a lot better.
However given that this comfort came in the form of a fucking little gremlin, that didn't understand fiscal responsibility even if it starved her, I really have to reevaluate if having a girlfriend, and being in a relationship is all that.
For example:
"What are you doing?"
"EEEEEEE! Josh, look, look! This is an authentic YoRHa 2B cosplay uniform, signed by YOKO TARO-SENSEI HIMSELF!" Said my Weeb Girlfriend pointing at the shopping site, and what she put in her online cart.
"...You're not getting that." I looked at the price in horror.
"Wah," she sounded heartbroken. "Okay, Josh, just think of me wearing that and-"
"Sara, we are not getting what's basically a gothic lolita porn dress for, 5000 DOLLARS, ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE!" I screamed. Forget about rent, we won't be able to eat.
"We can just do some intermittent fasting for a few months. It would be good for our health-WAIT, JOSH NO!"
I unplugged the computer right away, shutting down the whole thing. Yeah, right 'intermittent fasting'. That lazy ass can't stick to fucking walking everyday for her step-counting watch that she blew her money on, because it looks like a Digivice.
So yeah, having a Weeb Girlfriend is... an experience.
And it's only while I'm in this contemplation I realized... the apartment is too quiet.
I sighed, got up and went to see what Sara was doing.
She was on the computer again naturally. Although oddly enough she wasn't watching anime or playing a video game.
I'm not of the opinion of that anime or video games are for kids anymore, but they just don't seem to click with me.
Latest anime she forced me to watch was "High School DxD". It was just some teenager's jack off fantasy. Sara tried to convince me that if you push past the "ecchi-ness" of the series, the worldbuilding is actually pretty intriguing and interesting.
I sat back and thought about it, as I did promise her to actually give hobbies their due considerations-also because doing that was better than her trying to use some philosopher argument on why the intrinsic sentimentality and meaning to buying anime figurines was more important than rent, due to us ephemeral material being. Yeah, no, fuck that. Having food and shelter was more important than fulfilling some temporary pleasure.
Where was I? Right High School DxD.
I really sat back and thought about it.
And came to the natural conclusion that that anime world is shit. I mean, I'm not the more religious person. I don't think I'm all that wise or spiritual, but I did go up Catholic, and that anime world is just an insult to everything Christian.
Yes, the Church being corrupt is an anime staple, but fuck me, the real Church is not this cartoonishly evil or stupid. At least I hope it isn't now, and more importantly, if we assume Heaven being real as a fact and not based on faith, like the anime says, then nothing the Church says has any meaning, because you can just ask the literal Angels for confirmation.
The only reason why the Devils are the heroes in the story is because we literally follow the only examples of them not being, well, fucking Devils. Everyone who does evil shit, is either killed on screen, or the evil shit happens off screen in a casual mentioned.
The Fallen Angels shouldn't fucking exist. They are hilariously cartoonishly evil. And why the fuck does anyone trust that fucking evil, goatee looking motherfucker, Azazel with anything?
That's not to mention what kind of hell it is to live in a world where all mythology was real. How the average person can survive to die of cancer at old age in that world is a mystery to me.
So yeah, the world of DxD is a shitty place to live if it was real.
Sara tried to convince me that living in that world would be pretty cool, but yeah, no, I'm not seeing it.
...Admittedly the discussion with her on the anime in general was fun, since she did look happy, her face lighting up throughout that. So maybe she just likes to argue for arguing.
I shook my head and focused on the present. I reached her to see her filling some kind of survey on the screen.
"What's up?" I said, speaking up.
Sara flinched, and slowly looked back at me, with a face frozen in that mischievous closed-lips smile, when she's getting caught and yet having no guilt whatsoever.
"What did you do?" I quickly said, before focusing on the screen. The URL was familiar-My eyes widened.
"Did you click on the link from that spam email? The one that's obviously a virus link?" I tried to sound stern, but inside I was panicking.
I had a shit ton of work reports and files saved on that computer. Things I have to submit soon and stuff I'm keeping for reference and need to look back for later stuff.
Sara just gave an innocent grin.
"Lol," Said my Weeb GF as she clicked the 'Submit' button of survey site. "Lmao."
The computer instantly shut down. The lights went out as well.
I don't remember what happened next.
But I have the distinct feeling that I might have spanked my Weeb Girlfriend after that, with her laughing and moaning all the while.
I woke up at the crack of dawn as usual.
Face washed. Teeth brushed. Warm-up exercise done. Then shower and clothes.
It's been 15 years since I was born, or rather, reborn into this world. I've been isekai'd.
At least something good came out of all the anime Sara forced me to watch, so I would know what the fuck happened to me.
I don't know how or why, but I know it's her fault. Somehow.
So quick recap, my name is Joshua Joost-Call me Josh, Joshua feels too formal-I was born in this world in France, rather than America, and I still have the same name as in my last life. Neat.
In this world I'm an orphan. Not due to anything... too tragic? It took a while for me to learn what happened to my parents and... Yeah, I could see why the orphan director of the orphanage I grew up in was shifty and embarrassed on the topic.
My father and mother were 90 and 87 when they had me. Yeah, I literally had no clue how. Like, shouldn't my mom had been in menopause of something? Like what the fuck? Either way, they just... passed away a few months after having me.
Both at the same time.
...While doing the deed. Again.
I mean, good for them I suppose.
Currently I was on a school trip, at a small town in Wales. It was part social studies about other cultures. Although if we really wanted to do that, we could have gone to somewhere in Asia, Africa or the Americas.
The trip to Llanberis, Wales was cheaper and closer.
"Josh?" A sleepy voice came the other bed in the room. My classmate, Thomas. Currently our class was divided in groups, with two or three people sharing a room, in the hotel we were staying at. Our class isn't that big, but so were the rooms. Thomas and I were lucky to get one of the 'bigger' rooms.
"S'up." I said, as I finished dressing up. We had a trip scheduled for today, but I knew no one would be awake or active till after twelve, so I was gonna head out for a walk on my own.
"Bro, it's like four in the morning. Seriously?" Thomas gave a sleepy glare.
"It's closer to six. Sorry, I just wake up at this time." I said, about to head out.
"Where going?" He yawned and went deeper under the covers. "So tell Ms. Petit."
"Just out for a walk. Should be back before everyone is up and about." I said, and opened the room's door, hearing a 'right, later' on the way out.
I headed down the hotel floors to the ground floor, then left the building. The English town our school group were in was a quaint little place. It had a cozy feeling with the wind a bit chilly, but I felt used to it. Or maybe it was because the weather doesn't affect me as much due to my Holy Power.
Ah, yes. That.
It's one thing to wake up in a new world, where you kinda get the feeling 'I may be in an anime world'. It's another to start a new life with a whole different lifetime of memories, that you're sure aren't yours.
Archangel Michael.
I was Archangel Michael from the anime, High School DxD.
At least I have his memories. I could also feel Heaven's Holy Light in my soul. That's something.
The memories were helpful to just confirm which world I was reborn in. At least that anime marathon with Sara was helpful for something.
I was sure that Michael of this world was still alive. My powers could "track" prayer at they head to heaven in a sense. It was easy to give a kid some money to pray specifically to the Archangel asking that he gets some ice cream or something. Then the kid left and used the money I gave him to get that ice cream. So good on him, smart kid.
It was kinda... I don't really know what to call it. 'Weird' doesn't seem to fit. I had the memories of an angelic being's life. Memories of the early days of mankind, memories of God-HOLY SHIT! I ACTUALLY KNOW GOD EXISTS!-memories of the Great War. Of Father's... of God's death. That's another can of bullshit.
Of the Heaven Faction's decline with me-With Michael at the helm.
My rage at the complacency of A FUCKING ARCHANGEL, at least assured me that I was still myself. That I wasn't overtaken by the memories. Yet I was technically Michael. While the actual Michael was still alive.
This is all Sara's fault.
I wasn't sure what to do about... all of this. About this new life of mine. Did I even need to do anything? Should I?
I wasn't some kind of hero in my last life? And even if I try to just live my life and be good to others, that didn't mean I wanted to go out of my way to help or save others. If someone in front of me needed help I'd give it, but...
And just like that the anger came back.
How was I any different than Michael?
But he's an Archangel and I'm a human. He has a bigger responsibility than me. I'm just some guy in this world.
Yet I had powers identical to the Archangel. That's a whole nother can of worms.
It's been years and I haven't yet decided what I wanted to do about all of this, in this new life. Maybe I'm procrastinating. I trained my body to be in my best shape. I went and took fighting lessons, always telling myself 'just in case'. Yet I never committed to anything. Heck I don't even know where to start, if I wanted to do something, or help people in this world.
My legs were just taking me around town, while slowly making my way to the lake. My extra senses pulled me in that direction. To some kind of holy energy 'sleeping' at the bottom of the lake. I was just going to check it out of curiosity.
My head snapped as I looked to the side, wide-eyed. I sensed emotions of fear and pain. Magical energies were erupting and acting out at the end of town and were getting closer.
My eyesight expanded, looking longer and further as the angelic power in my soul reacted to my will. I 'look' further away and saw a woman and child being chased by vampires.
The woman had a cross that was empowered by an angel's Holy Power. Strong enough to cast a barrier around her and the child, but it's power is not infinite. It was weakening, crumbling slowly bit by bit. The woman was tired and still dragging her child with her, trying to run further. The boy was desperately grabbing onto his mother's hand while doing everything to keep up. But I could see he can't last long. The speed and reach of an adult was greater than a child. His arm is tiring and his stamina was running out fast. His mother didn't realize that.
Odds are, according to anime clichés, the boy is gonna trip and fall soon, requiring his mother to sacrifice herself.
My power then extended further, to reveal to me who the boy and his mothers were.
Sofia Legrenzi, a simple Christan woman, a baker, and wife of the angel, Zadkiel.
The boy was Teodoro Legrenzi, a Miracle Child of the human and angel.
I moved.
There were Fallen Angels nearby watching the whole thing. Likely orchestrated it.
I stopped holding back on my Holy Power, making a chain shoot up in the air in an arc, across houses, across town, and toward the lake, grabbing what was obviously a Holy Sword at the bottom.
You know what? Seriously. Fuck this world.
That's it. I'm not letting this anime world's plot come to me. I'm coming for it.
The mother and son ran through the forest, seeing the town ahead. Sofia Legrenzi hoped they could find a church to hide in and seek sanctuary till Zadkiel came and got her.
Her family should have been safe, yet while Zadkiel was away, they were found by vampires. She didn't know how, all she knew was that she needed to get her son and run. Their car didn't last long, and the vampires chasing them caused it to crash.
The rosario her husband had given her, was able to protect her with God's light thus far. But it's blessing was not infinite. She kept praying while running, hoping that her prayer, her faith would make its light last just that little but long. That little bit more.
They were so close now and-
"AAAH!" Teodoro cried out as in an instant he fell, letting go of her hand.
Sofia stopped. Her face paling, draining of blood, even though her heart was pumping so fast. Her son was outside of the rosario's protective range.
"Teodoro!" Sofia shouted and she tried to dash back, only a Spear of Light of stab itself between her and her child. A spear whose light she usually found comforting, but this time, filled her with dread. That Light Spear held none of the warming and protection her husband's felt like. It felt shallow, lacking, even foreboding.
"My, my, such an unfortunate series of events we have here." A voice said from above. The flapping of wings were heard, and it was not reassuring as Sofia was used to from that sound.
"No." Came out her small voice. Sofia's eyes teared up from the despair at seeing that there weren't being pursued by one enemy of God. That they were being played with, and their hope was false.
The vampires had reached them and circles the boy and his mother separating them.
"You led us into quiet the chase, meat. But it did help build up an appetite." Said the vampire leading the group. He looked at the mother and child, seeing the fear in their eyes, taking it in with smug satisfaction. "Hmm, how we play a little game? You don't mind that, do you, Miss Grizel?" He said toward the fallen angel.
"Oh by all means, Lord Armand. Enjoy yourself, after all, their worthless Angel isn't here to protect-" The female fallen said, before feeling powerful magic aura swept over the area.
Suddenly the ground was shaking. Something large was coming over the horizon-
SLAM!
Grizel and the fallen flying with her, that couldn't react and dodge out of the way, was met with a giant conglomeration of earth, dirt and trees, like it was one giant pillar-like structure. With massive amount of Holy Energy within it.
Pain was everything the fallen who were hit knew at that moment, as they were buried under the sudden giant earth column.
Atop the giant throw pile of earth, was a boy, a teenager of fifteen, grasping a sword that was stabbed in the heap.
The sword was Excalibur Ruler. A Holy Sword able to control thing it stabbed. Such as the ground, and just shape it into a giant pillar, throw it at a flying enemy and let the wielder be dragged by the momentum and weight.
"Hey blood fucker!" Said Joshua Joost, as the Holy Sword began gathering light, as in sunlight and normal light, upon itself, since technically it's always in contact with photons. "Ever heard of karma, because God wants to have a word with you!"
"Who the hell do you think you are, human, to speak to your betters like that?" Shouted one of the vampire minion.
"I'm the dentist, I'm here to rearrange your teeth." The teen growled back, making the vampires blink and flinch back from the killing intent and holy aura.
"Wha-" The vampire leader didn't have time to even comprehend or respond to this wild delinquent human that just came out of nowhere.
Joshua jumped straight at the panicking vampire, holding what was now a bomb of light turned into Holy Light upon Excalibur Ruler.
"DEUS VULT, BITCH!"
AN: Yes. The Weeb GF did ask him out because his name is Jojo. No, he doesn't know what Jojo is. Also yes, she is also in this isekai. Likely who you expect.
