My girlfriend.


"Dean Dean Dean Dean!"

"Come on in Beck, the door is unlocked."

"Dean Dean Dean Dean!"

"You can stop banging on the fucking door, it's unlo- I'm coming!"

As the door opened, Becky's arms didn't stop flapping.

So instead of a hard solid wood, she started knocking on my chest and face.

"Beck-Beck-stop-for fu-stop!"

"Dean Dean Dean Dean!"

I had to grab her wrists to stop her fluttering her wrists at me.

"Dah dah dah, enough of that."

"Sorry sorry sorry sorry."

"You good? Drink an extra coffee this morning?"

"I shotgunned like three monsters on the way here."

"Jesus Christ, don't have a heart attack on me."

"I'm good I'm good I'm good I'm good."

"Okay, okay. Now come on, what's up?"

"Here here here here here."

She shoved a thick wad of papers into my chest.

"Look look look look look look."

"Okay okay, is this the sample?"

"Yes yes yes yes yes yes."

"Sweet, did you finish it last night?"

"Four o'clock in the morning. Four? Four. Four? Yeah, four."

"God, alright. That explains the monsters."

"Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. Anyway, look at it. Look at it!"

"I will, I will. I'll skim through it before we bring it up to him."

"Aww. What do you mean 'skim'?"

"I really wanna see it but you know he's got it get as soon as possible."

"Awwwww you suck. I hate you and you suck. You mutt. You skunk. You raccoon. You…you…"

"Alright, come on. You're crashing."

"No I'm…just…yawning. Leave me alone."

"Come on tiger, let's get you to your office."

"No I don't want to."

"Yes, come on. Go take a nap."

"I don't wanna."

"Yes you do, come on."

"Ugh, fine. Douchebag."

She dragged her feet all the way to her office.

Instead of reaching out to grab the handle, she slowly walked head first into the door.

I couldn't tell if the thunk was the wood or her skull.

I reached over her to open the door, as she held her head low and skulked inside.

"There you go Beck. There you go."

She kicked over a box, revealing another bean bag I never saw before.

She plopped down on it face first.

"If we need you, I'll come get you."

I could barely hear her muffled voice as she just responded

"Uh-huh."

I reversed out of the door, closing it slowly.

But before the door closed all the way, she called out to me.

"Dean?"

"Yeah? What's up Beck."

"Uhh…n-nothing. I'll see you later."

"Alright. See you later."

With the door closed, I gripped the huge sample with both of my hands.

She had it coiled poorly together with a single string, so as I made my way to the elevator I tried to undo it.

As the doors opened up, I got the string undone.

"Cool. Let's have a look."


"Yeah I know. Listen. No. No. Listen! We can have as many lunches and meetings as you want, that doesn't- oh Dean! Dean! My guy! My man! There he is!"

My boss sprung to his feet, forgetting he was using the wired phone this time.

"Whoop, shit, uh…hey let me go. I'll call you right back. Yeah, yeah, I know. Let me go. Let me go. Let me- asshole."

He quickly slammed the phone back down, before brushing his hair back with his hands.

"Dean, it's too early for this shit. You know what I'm saying?"

"Yes sir, absolutely."

"Alright, I knew you would. Where's Rebecca?"

"Napping. But she's here."

"Napping?"

"Yeah, she was up all night finishing this up. I figured I'd put her down and let her get some rest."

"Haha, 'put her down'? What are you, her mother?"

"Absolutely not."

"Ah well, whatever. Is that the sample?"

"Yes sir, here it is."

"Fucking sweet, hand it here if you don't mind."

"Yes sir, here you go."

"Thank you Dean. Alright, let's take a peek here and- whoa. Whoa. Whoa."

He was immediately mystified by the pages.

"No fucking way Rebecca drew this."

"Yes sir. I think it's her best work yet."

"Dude, this…this is…"

He had to sit back down.

"This is fucking…this is pure gold right here."

"That would mean the world to her sir."

"Nah, it wouldn't mean shit coming from me."

"Nah, I don't think so."

"Anyway, damn good job Dean. Damn good job guys. I'll forward this to who it needs to go to right now."

He took a picture of the cover with his phone, and then put the whole sample into a leather case.

"Someone is on their way now to come get it, but I know for a fact if this is what you guys have in mind there is no chance of them turning this down."

"Thank you sir, truly."

"Alright there is also…uh…oh right, here it is."

He shuffled another mound of papers to the side, grabbing a few specific ones.

"Here you go Dean, as promised. Your overtime pay."

"Oh man, thank you sir."

"And would you do me a huge favor, and give Rebecca hers as well?"

"Ofcourse."

"Thank you bud."

"You had these ready to go already?"

"Dean, come on. I didn't doubt you guys for a second. You guys are number one and number two, you deserve this after all you do."

"Thank you so much sir, really. I can't tell you how excited we are to get going on this."

"I'm glad to- huh?"

Behind me, I could hear someone knock on the open door.

"Can I help you?"

I shuffled around in my chair, turning around to see who was there.

I didn't recognize them, but it was a woman wearing business attire. Clutching a handful of papers in a binder.

"Good morning gentlemen, hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Well miss, I'd hate to say that is the case. Can I ask who you are?"

"Did security not let you know?"

"Security? As a matter of fact he-"

He reached down to his phone and paged Alex.

"Yo, Alex."

Alex responded, his voice shrouded in static.

"Yo what up boss man?"

"May I ask who is in my office right now and why you didn't tell me they were coming?"

"Bro, she had an appointment."

"She did?"

"Yeah man. Uhh…says right here. Rhea from HR at eight forty-five."

"Rhea from HR…uh…alright, thanks Alex."

"Yup."

Before looking back up, he slapped his palm on the table.

"Alright, looks like I either forgot or I wasn't told. My apologies."

With an eerie smile on her face, she responded back

"No worries at all. It's…Josh, right?"

I looked back towards him, and he looked right back at me.

"Your name is Josh?"


I was quickly shooed out of the office.

I was assured multiple times 'it's not a big deal' by Rhea but I've never seen Josh so flustered before.

And while it'll take me a while to get used to using his name, it'll take even longer to figure out what he seemed so worried about.

At the top of my head, the only time someone gets nervous when HR pops in is if they are about to get fired.

But if that was the case, I doubt they'd schedule an appointment just to fire him.

And I doubt even more he was sexually harassing someone.

But no matter what, the morning was still young.

I was back at work.

I can't just stand here pondering a bunch of what-if scenarios and fall back into that trap.

So with a sample that seems surefire to get approved, that means I have a story and dialogue to write. All of my other duties and whatnot are taking the backseat for a little bit.

As I made my way back to my office, I had a quick moment where I realized the handful of things looming over me didn't seem to be there anymore.

From Nikki, to Becky, to even the voice and the shadow.

I wasn't worried about Nikki.

I wasn't worried about Becky.

And when it came to the voice and the last lock on the door, I can't say I wasn't worried.

But Nikki hasn't been wrong yet.

If opening that lock was the only way to get this done and over with, then I shouldn't fight back.

I'm not gonna go out of my way to confront it again, but having a plan for the next time it does was oddly comforting.

I was walking in stride, not paying attention to my steps.

As I walked down the hallway, I could see my reflection in the windows.

I saw myself walking by, my head held high and my heart leading the way.

I'd like to think it was bravery. Or freedom.

Or some other obscure intangible trait.

But I already knew the main reason was because I was seeing Nikki after work.


" 'And then as the grandfather clock ticked, her heartbeat matching the seconds, the air became heavy as a fog. Difficult to'…uh… 'Difficult to witness'…nah that's dumb."

I was near the end of chapter two.

Littered around my desk was two soda cans, one cup of coffee, and one bag of trash which used to be my lunch.

Without turning around to see the sun or looking at the clock, I knew with that formula of garbage it must have been about three o'clock.

I sat back in my chair and took a huge stretch, feeling a small crack in my back.

As I approached the keyboard again, I heard a knock at my door.

"Come in."

The door opened slowly, as Josh made his way in.

"Hey Dean."

"Oh, hey Josh. You good?"

His hair was disheveled, his buttoned shirt undone at the collar, and his eyes seemed tired.

"Uh…yeah. I'm…i'm alright."

He shuffled his feet, all the way to the chair across from my desk.

He dropped himself so hard into it, it nearly toppled over.

"Uh..no offense sir but you don't seem like yourself."

"I don't?"

"No, I wouldn't say so. How did it go with the HR lady?"

"Nah."

He flapped his hand at me in one heavy wave.

"Went alright. Uh…"

He pinched his eyes, the weight of whatever was on his mind too heavy for his neck alone.

"Sir, it's three o'clock. I don't think you ever stayed this late before."

"Three? It's three already?"

"Yeah. Three o' nine."

"Fuck."

His pinch became an aggressive wipe all over his face.

If I didn't know any better I'd say he just woke up after a night of binge drinking.

"Uh…Dean I…uh…got something to tell you."

"What is it sir?"

"Um…uh…i-is…is Rebecca awake?"

"No sir, haven't heard from her all day. I was just about to go check on her."

"Good good, uh…don't. Don't. Let her sleep some more."

"Okay…uh…well what is it?"

"Fuck..I…um…"

"Sir, you didn't get fired did you?"

"Huh? Fired? Me?"

"…yes?"

"Oh no, God no. No no no. I'm good."

"Oh, okay then."

"It's just uh…just…"

He took an insanely large breath in through his nose.

Before he let the breath back out, he slapped both of his knees and stood right up.

"The sample was approved. They fucking loved it Dean. Loved every word, every detail, all of it."

"Oh, cool."

"Yup. You guys have done it again. We got our next comic."

"Well that's great news sir. I'm actually headfirst into it now, I'm nearing the end of the second chapter."

"Amazing. Completely amazing. You're the best Dean. Rebecca is the best. You guys are the best."

"Uh…thank you sir. But, are you sure everything is okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna head out, just wanted to…tell you that first."

"Okay then…uh…thanks? I'll see you tomorrow."

"I definitely will. I will definitely see you tomorrow."

He pointed two finger guns at me, and backed his way out of the door.

I could see him walk down the hallway, still pointing the guns at me.

"Alrighty then…that was weird."

I could hear the elevator ding.

I took another big stretch in my chair, alrighty out of my groove from that interaction.

Before the stretch ended, I could hear heavy footsteps from outside in the hallway.

Scurrying past the window into my office was Josh again, leaning into my office through the doorframe.

"You guys really are the best Dean. I hope you know that."

"Uh…sure. Yeah. I know that, thank you sir."

"We wouldn't be who and what we are without you. Without her. You know that, right?"

"…yeah. I know sir, thank you."

"Good. Good."

He slapped the doorframe, the slap echoing into my office.

"Good."

He made his way back into the hallway, the elevator ding following a few seconds after.

"Okay, something's up."

I got out of my chair and went into the hallway.

Down at the end I could see Josh in the elevator, eerily standing directly in the center.

Without saying a word, he just smiled and raised his hand.

I waved back, and watched as the elevator doors closed on him.

"…what in the ever living fuck was that?"


An unexpected HR meeting.

Hangover eyes and body language.

And nothing to say except compliments and suspicious goodbyes.

Sufficed to say I began to worry about Josh.

He said he wasn't fired.

But what other terrible news can lead to this?

She wasn't a doctor, so it's not like she told him he had cancer.

She wasn't a veterinarian, so it's not like she told him his dog has cancer.

She wasn't a police officer, so it's not like she told him his rights to an attorney had cancer.

So what could it possibly have been?

Maybe he lied?

Maybe today was the last day I would ever see him and all I said to him was 'see you tomorrow.'

Maybe he- nah nah nah.

What did I just say?

I can be worried, he was definitely suspicious.

But at the current moment in time, there's better things to do than comprehend what life changing adjustment my boss may or may not be going through.

Right now, I should just trust him and get back to work.

I made my way back into the office, before I noticed Becky's check on my desk.

"Ah shit that's right."

I grabbed the envelope, and made my way to Becky's door.

I gave the door a few solid knocks, not knowing if she was awake yet or not.

"Beck? It's Dean. You awake?"

I didn't see or hear anything, so I knocked a few more times.

"Becky?"

After a few more knocks, I could see some dim red lights come on through the curtain.

"Oh, there she is."

It took a couple seconds, but the door soon unlocked with a slouching Becky behind it.

She was rubbing her eyes with her sleeves, her hair down and messy.

"Mmm. Hey."

"Hey, good morning sunshine."

"Mornin- huh? Morning? It's still the morning?"

"Nah, it's three in the afternoon. You slept this whole time?"

"Mmm. Yeah. Yeah…three?"

"Yeah, three."

"Fuck. Ah…fuck."

"No need to panic, you didn't miss anything."

"No no, I figured as much but that's not…uh…"

"What is it?"

"Nothing, shut the fuck up."

"You got it. Here, I got something for you."

"Yay, paper. What is it?"

"Your overtime pay. Josh came through."

"….who the fuck is Josh?"


"Yeah, something's not right with him. That's super fucking weird."

"You're telling me. But I don't wanna push him, I don't want to make whatever it is worse."

I started telling her about the sample and what happened today.

We found ourselves sitting down in the beanbags talking about it.

"Well, I imagine we'll hear about it sooner than later. What did you think about the sample?"

"Beck, it was amazing."

"Really?"

"I'm not joking, I really think it's your best work yet."

"Aww. Shut the fuck up."

"Hey hey, you asked."

"Come on, you don't mean that."

"I do Beck. I do. Like, I was mad handing it to him because I wasn't done looking at it."

"Really? What did you like about it?"

"Well for one, your anatomy and shadows were fucking stellar. Even without coloring it in, the shading was perfect along the bodies."

"That's actually great to hear, I was worried about that. I thought without color it seemed like they were doing it with a million lights on."

"Not at all. Even with just the quick peeks, that came through amazingly. And like I said, that anatomy was awesome."

"Oh yeah?"

"Oh yeah. Like a black and white photograph."

"Shucks."

"Dude, since when did you need me to tell your art is amazing?"

"Hey, this is uncharted territory for me too you aardvark."

"Bullshit."

"You suck. I hate you and you suck."

"I know. Anyway, how's Gigi?"

"She's good. She had a good day yesterday actually."

"Awesome, happy to hear that. Nothing from…your dad, right?"

"Nope. Not a peep."

"Good, good. How are you feeling by the way?"

"Hm?"

"You. How's your leg?"

"Oh, good actually. Still a little sore, but doesn't really hurt when I walk anymore."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah actually. I mean, if you sat on my lap right now it'd probably kill me but other than that it's alright."

"Well it's a good thing I don't plan on doing that."

"Fair enough."

"And your face is looking good too."

"…uh…w-what?"

"Your face."

"Uh…w-what do you mean my face?"

"I just mean the bruises Beck. And your lip. Looks like they cleared up pretty good."

"O-oh…yeah…thanks."

I felt my phone vibrate, and after a quick check it was a text from Nikki confirming the address for my apartment.

"What's up Dean?"

"Huh? Oh nothing, just Nikki."

"Got'cha. Oh hey, what time is it?"

"It is…four o'ten."

"Fuck, really?"

"Yeah, why? You gotta do something?"

"Uh…shit…yeah actually."

"Okay, I'll leave you to it then."

"Alright, cool. I'll…ah…shit."

"Whoa, what's up?"

"Uh…shit. Actually, Dean, can you give me a hand?"

"Sure, what is it?"

"I'm in a bad spot here, I shouldn't have sat down like this with my leg. Can you help me up?"

"Oh yeah, here."

I grabbed both of her hands and gently pulled her up towards me.

"Ah ah ah….okay, cool. Thanks Dean."

"No probl- oh."

"What is it?"

With my thumbs over her hands, I could feel her knuckles.

They were smooth and completely healed.

"Your hands are good too."

"Oh…y-yeah."

"Smooth and no scabs or nothing. Man."

"Y-yeah…uh…"

I stroked her knuckles a couple more times. Comparing them to the rough bloody mess they were a few days ago was a relief.

"Um…Dean?"

"What's up?"

"C-can you…uh…give me a couple minutes?"

"Hm?"

"Y-yeah, I just…wanna clean up a sec. But I…wanna show you something…before we leave."

"Oh yeah, sure. Will do."

I dropped her hands and made my way to the door.

"You'll let me know when you're ready?"

"Hm-mm."

"Cool, just let me know."

I left her office and stood still in the hallway.

I looked towards my own office, and then the elevator.

I was done writing for the day, but didn't want to just sit by and wait.

I looked at the elevator again, imagining Josh waving at me.

"You know what, hang on."


"Hey Alex."

"Yo, what's up Dean? You're early."

"Yeah I know, I know. I ain't leaving yet."

"Ah fuck, doesn't hurt to try."

"Hey Alex, did you see Josh come down? A little bit ago?"

"Josh?"

"Yeah, Josh."

"Who the fuck is Josh?"

"Does seriously no one here know his name?"

"Who is he though?"

"The boss."

"Boss-man's name is Josh?"

"Yeah, apparently. I just figured it out."

"Well yeah, in that case. Came down a bit ago."

"Did he say anything?"

"Yeah actually. He was being real weird. Came over to me, shook my hand, and told me I was the best and just dipped."

"Really?"

"Yeah, he looked like shit too."

"So it wasn't just me."

"Why, what he say to you?"

"The same thing honestly. Came into my office like he had some bad news, but then just kept telling me I'm the best."

"Got'cha. I wonder what's up with him."

"It has to have something to do with that HR lady."

"Bro, I was thinking the same shit. Lady creeped the hell out of me."

"But you said she had an appointment though, right?"

"I mean, yes and no."

"Yes and no? What do you mean yes and no?"

"Well like, her appointment was there. She walked in, said she had an appointment, I confirmed it, and sent her on the way."

"Right, and?"

"Well believe it or not, I keep a good eye on shit like that. She definitely didn't have that appointment when we left last week."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really. Once she left to go upstairs, I looked around and saw that the appointment wasn't made until this morning. Like before anyone was here."

"No shit."

"I swear man. I could show you."

"Well no wonder know one knew she was coming."

"And bro, Dean, listen to this. When she left, she was on the phone with somebody. Talking about some memo and shit and that things will be ready shortly."

"What things?"

"I don't know, she left before I heard anything else."

"Jesus man, it's freaking me out."

"Same here."

"Whatever she said to him, it couldn't have been good. I've never seen Josh like that."

"Me neither bro."

"Hey Alex, do you have anything on your computer about her?"

"Huh?"

"Like, I don't know. Is there a file on her or something?"

"Bro, what the fuck do you think this is?"

"I don't know man, I just want to know more about her. She doesn't seem like HR."

"I agree man, I agree. But I have no way of looking her up."

"Well what about her badge number?"

"Badge number?"

"…yeah Alex, her badge number."

"…we have badges?"


"Alright, she's legit. Her number confirms it."

"Alex, aren't you supposed to use badges before confirming the appointments and stuff?"

"Aren't you supposed to be writing some shit?"

"Fair enough, fair enough. But come on man."

"Well what the fuck man, it's not like you or Rebecca use your badges either."

"Whatever, whatever."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Anyway, what does it say on her?"

"Alright, says she's brand spanking new here. Only been employed like three months. But she's already been given massive amount of clearance, bitch probably made the appointment herself."

"Damn."

"And this should be her log, shows here where she's been going and every time shes been checked in."

"Oh sweet."

"Yeah, I think everyone is supposed to have a log like this."

"She's punctual, I'll give her that."

"Okay let's see. Let's see. Uh…."

"Anything sticking out Alex?"

"I mean…yeah, maybe."

"What's 'maybe'?"

"Well look at this, she's been getting checked in to almost every other building this place owns. The other studios and shit. All over the place."

"Really?"

"Yeah man. First it was over here on the coast, then that I think is the main printers, this is the big corporate office, and a few other spots before coming here today."

"Got'cha. So what the hell would a brand new HR lady be doing traveling all over the entire company?"

"You tell me man. Whoever she is, it's bad news."

"Here, can you look at the logs for the building themselves?"

"Maybe…yes, here we go."

"Anything stick out?"

"Uh….huh."

"Uh-oh, what's up?"

"Well, I mean… take a look at this. I'm starting with the other studio, and she went there first. She got checked in on this day, and then checked out the same day."

"Okay."

"But if you look here, look at all of these other people that checked in the same day. And if I switch the dates before then, it seems to be the regular people."

"Right."

"But then, we go back to the day she was there, they are all there."

"…okay?"

"But then the next few days, they aren't."

"They aren't?"

"Yeah man, look. There's like, three or four people that never checked back in."

"Oh fuck."

"Shit, what the fuck is going on? If she's HR, then why are- mother fuck!"

"Sorry Alex! Sorry! Shit, I forgot my phone was on."

"You cock sucker, that gave me a heart attack! God dammit!"

"Who the hell is calling me- oh, it's Becky. Hello? Hey, what's up? You're all set? Alright, Alright, I'll be right up. Okay, bye."

"Mother fucker man, leave your phone on vibrate like a normal fucking person. God."

"Alex, I am so fucking sorry."

"Man, you come down here and and we start doing this Scooby-doo shit, you just can't be fucking doing that to me. God, mother fucker."

"My bad man, my bad. I'll see you in a little bit."

"Yo, where you going?"

"Going to see Becky."

"…now who the fuck is Becky?"


"H-hey Dean. Come on in…just…watch your step."

I took a couple steps into her office, the only lighting coming in from the hallway itself.

"So what's up Beck, you wanna show me something?"

"Y-yeah…you could say that."

The door was closed, her office a complete abyss now.

I waited a few seconds, assuming she'd illuminate the room into some color by now.

But after I could hear her take some steps somewhere behind me in the dark, I guess I assumed wrong.

"Whoa whoa whoa, Beck, I'm blind as a bat over here. What's the deal?"

"Nothing, nothing."

I turned towards the direction I heard her voice, shuffling my feet so I didn't trip over a third beanbag I didn't know was there.

"Beck, can you see right now?"

"Kind of, I just know my office."

"Cool, I don't. Can you turn a light on please?"

"Give me a sec, please."

"Well what are you doing?"

"Nothing! Please…just…hold on."

I don't know what I was hearing, but it sounded like she was kicking things to the side.

"You can't see either, can you?"

"Yes I…I…can. I'm just…making a path."

"Because you can't see where you're going."

"Shut up."

"Come on man, just turn a light on. If you wanna show me something on the pad it doesn't have to be-"

"Stop! That's not what I'm doing. Please, just give me one more sec."

"Alright, alright."

It felt like she spun me around in a full circle following her noises.

"Here, why don't I use my phone and-"

"No! No! Stop, don't."

"Fuck, alright."

"I just…fuck, I just wanna surprise you, okay? Just…let me…fuck, just one more second. Okay?"

"Oh, alright. Uh…surprise me with what?"

"Nothing! I mean- not… I mean…just please be quiet? Don't say anything else? Please?"

"Okay, okay."

"Alright, thank you. Just a little bit more, I promise."

So I stood in place, letting her do whatever she was doing around me.

I had nothing else to do except ponder what this surprise could have been.

But luckily I didn't have to spend too long before I could hear her sound ready.

"Okay, there it is. Okay, there's that and…that…and…okay. Alright. Whew. Fuck, here we go."

I turned around to try and face where it sounded like she was coming from.

As to where in the room I was or which wall I was facing, I completely lost track.

But the other cluttered noises settled down, and all I could hear now was Becky clearing her throat.

"H-hey…uh…Dean?"

"Yo, where are you?"

"Over here, just follow my voice."

"Alright, I think I got you. Want me to try and head over?"

"No no, you're good where you are."

"You got it. Sooo…what's up?"

"Um…n-nothing."

"Uh-huh, right. What's this surprise?"

"Right, right. Uh…fuck…"

"That doesn't sound good."

"No no, I just…I'm just really fucking nervous."

"You? Nervous?"

"…yeah."

"Worried I'm not gonna like it?"

"I mean…yeah. Kind of."

"Look, Beck. I'm sure whatever it is, I'll love it."

"…you…you don't know that Dean."

"Yes I do Beck. It's alright. You can show me."

I could hear her take a gigantic breath in.

And as she quickly let it back out, I could hear her confidently chuckle.

"Okay Dean. You ready?"

"Ready."

A couple seconds went by, with no major audible noises or lights.

But then breaking through the darkness, a sharp noise came through.

An abrasive sound I was familiar with, but I never heard as loud before.

It sounded like…a zipper?

"Hey Beck, was that a-"

Within moments, the room erupted in a dark pink light.

Everything in the room became a magenta silhouette.

From the boxes to the furniture.

The lights were still quite dim, like a dark room ready to develop photographs.

But I still had to wince my eyes to adjust.

Rubbing my eyes and blinking as fast as I could.

After a couple seconds, I was able to comfortably look down.

Seeing my own feet blending into the ground.

Squinting my eyes, I followed my vision up.

Adjusting my eyes more and more as they took in the concentrated color.

As my eyes were fully opening up, I was faced with just a wall.

Shadows decorated in between the shapes.

As I looked to the right, I noticed the curtain hanging over her office window.

I now had my bearings, but no sign of Becky.

"Over here Dean."

For a split second, I didn't recognize the voice in the room with me.

It was lower, smoother, and sultry.

I slowly turned myself around, being absorbed by a sense of being trapped with an intruder.

My eyes gazed over the dark room.

My body was prepped to run.

But not far in the distance, was a familiar silhouette.

It was Becky, it had to be.

Even in this dark rose glow, I could tell it was her.

But there she was, standing not too far from me.

Wearing a slim and revealing black dress.

Her hoodie at her ankles.


"Uh….surprise."

I held out my arms like a scarecrow, trying to show off whatever figure I could.

I tried keeping my head high, I tried keeping the confident voice.

But this dress barely fit me, and I didn't want to spill out in front of him.

"Do you…um…d-do you like it?"

I waited a couple seconds for him to respond, but he didn't say a damn thing.

"Dean? U-um…do…I look…um…p-pretty?"

Fuck, pretty?! Why in the fuck would you say pretty!?

What is this, fucking recess?!

"I-I'm…beautiful…right?"

No no no you idiot! Don't ask him to confirm it!

That's not confident, that's chickenshit!

"I…I…"

Come on you lizard, this isn't working!

Just hurry up!

Don't stop!

Remember the lines!

"I…just wanted…t-to…tell you…something."

There you go you spineless ant. There you go.

Do the walk, come on.

Do the walk. Show off the legs.

"I've…uh…been meaning to…"

Fuck me, it's freezing in here.

Cover back up, come on.

No no no, wait! You complete moron, that's the whole point!

Deal with it!

Don't stop!

"Uh…tell you something."

Look at him, he hasn't moved an inch.

Fuck, that's creepy.

No no, hold on, he's probably just stunned by your beauty.

Or shit, is one of my tits out?

No no, we're good.

"I…I…"

Damn, he hasn't said anything either.

How stunned is he?

Is this a good thing?

Is he having a bad headache again?

Fuck, this is probably just scaring him to death.

No, no it shouldn't be.

He was ready to take on my dad, he shouldn't be scared of…me.

He's held me, he's hugged me, he's…seen me in my- he's not scared! He just can't be!

"I hope…you…uh..don't mind if..I…I…"

There you go, baby steps you little mutt.

Just keep- fuck, what was that?

Oh fuck, he's right there!

Did I seriously just bump into him!?

Way to pay attention you dipshit!

"Oh…uh..s-sorry…I…"

Gah, why are you apologizing!?

It's just Dean!

Well, that's not it anymore.

He's not just Dean.

He's just- hey!

Hello!? What in the fuck are you doing!?

What's all this thinking for when he's right there!?

"Uh….uh…"

What do I do!?

What the fuck do I do!?

I don't know!

Just do something!

Grab his hand or just fucking anything at all!

But why would I do that!?

For fuck's sake, come on!

Just…

His hand feels nice.

It feels even smoother than last time.

Wow…

Damn…just touching him again is calming me down.


I gripped his hand with both of mine.

My thumbs on his palms, the rest of my fingers on the back of his hand.

Looking at his fingers gave me such warm and vivid memories.

Every time he touched me, how much warmth and comfort they spread onto me.

I couldn't help myself, and brought his hand to my cheek.

I know it's childish and immature, but I needed to nuzzle into it.

Suddenly the room didn't feel as cold.

Suddenly my heart didn't need to burst out of my chest.

Suddenly, I was able to look up at him again.

His eyes were still wide, his whole body still.

But feeling his touch again helped me remember who he was.

I was ready for this.

I know what I have to do.

"I just really needed to tell you something Dean."

I kept softly squeezing his hand with every breath.

"I hope I'm not overwhelming you again. It was never what I meant to do."

I remembered his expressions.

I now know what fear looks like in his eyes from the first time. I know what agony looks like from the second.

But his eyes were different this time.

So it must mean he wasn't feeling either.

"So this time, I wanted to make it special. In anyway I could."

I spent so long practicing and rehearsing the things I wanted to say next.

But looking up at him and feeling him again, made me forget all of it.

So I let my heart speak for me instead.

"Because, when I was scared, hurt, and lower then I ever have been before, you were there for me."

Some of my fingers began exploring, crawling in between his.

"And that feeling of being comforted by you has been the greatest thing I have ever felt. And I can only hope I could even come close to doing the same for you."

His fingers didn't resist me at all as mine snuck in and clasped his in between.

"I know for a long time, things were different Dean. Between you and me. And almost overnight, everything has changed."

Our two palms conjoined, his hand under my control.

"And I'm glad they did."

I brought our hands down to my waist. Which also brought me closer to him.

"Because for years, we've just been coworkers. But now, it feels like we are so much more than that."

I looked into his eyes, and even in this lighting they still seemed so sincere and kind. As kind as they did when I looked up at him, as he held me as tight as he could that day.

"There is a part of me that thinks what we had was enough. But I'm not listening to it for once."

His hand in mine, our bodies this close, reminded me of these things I'm feeling.

When I felt them before, I didn't know what they were or what to do with them.

"Because instead, there is a part of me that knows."

They were urges, they were desires.

"That knows what you truly mean to me."

And my urges brought my leg up out of my dress, and onto his thigh.

"That knows how much I need you."

My desires brought the fingers of my free hand onto his stomach, dancing up his body.

"And knows I need to do this."

That part of me brought his hand up, and rested it on my chest.

The warmth of his hand over my heart melting and releasing even more emotions from within me.

"That hopes you want this to."


Cool, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Dean, I'm gonna be the story director.

My weight pushed him down slowly. Onto his back and on the ground.

Just be honest, you a 'you know-what?'

Yeah, I am.

He was leaning up against the beanbags, looking straight up at me.

Okay, and Dean? Call me Becky.

I carefully stepped over him, my feet by his hips.

Your first time?

Yeah, it sucked.

You wanna tell me about it?

He didn't raise his hands or move at all. He just stayed still, silent.

Don't mince your words, or try to say the right thing. Just be honest.

He didn't resist, he didn't seemed scared. So both of us must be ready.

I didn't know what to think of it, I was scared. I'm scared now. Okay?

I pulled my dress aside, allowing me to easily lower myself down.

A-are you-

Becky, it's fine. It's done. Let's just move on, alright?

With one knee down on the floor and pressed into him, I was able to bring my body fully down.

You fucking cock sucker, I told you to get your fucking ass out of my fucking- oh….Dean.

I could feel him under me again. I could feel him with so much less separating us this time. Feeling him made my legs twitch.

Don't you dare apologize Becky. Don't you dare say you're sorry.

He was still so calm beneath me, his eyes seemingly confirming everything for me.

Let…g-go….D-Dean…come on…

No. I'm not letting you go.

As close as I was, I needed to be closer. And so I leaned forward.

It's okay Becky. I got you. I'm here. I'm here.

My hands and arms besides his head, casting a shadow over his face.

Come on Beck, you can do it. I need you to be strong for me a little longer.

My dress was loose and swaying down, I could feel his steady breaths on the skin of my chest.

Oh my god…okay…this is happening…okay…just…p-pull them down…come on Dean just…there you go…

His gaze still fixated on me and my eyes, and I returned his gaze right back.

No no…nothing..nothing…you're…uh…you're hands were cold. That's all.

My hands were-huh? I was just touching your leg, you never said they were-

Shut up.

I started bending my arms, resting the rest of my body on him. Feeling him under me, and now I felt him pressing into me as well.

Stop feeling guilty Becky. Please.

Staring into his eyes, I could see the other parts of his face. And I wanted to do something to all of them.

I just mean let your guard down. Don't be so stoic all the time, it's gonna wear you down and break you sooner than later.

I could feel his heart. It was beating steady, and even slower than mine.

You end up being the loneliest son of a bitch too.

He wasn't shaking, shivering, or struggling.

Besides you, he's all I have. I just want to be a good friend to him, I just want to understand him but why does he make it so fucking hard to do that?

He was allowing me.

I don't think it's his fault Beck. Whatever it is, there's something there that makes him what he is. Just like you.

I could feel the tip of his nose on mine.

The one thing he didn't know about me yet.

I wanted to feel more.

That I loved him.

I wanted to be more.

That I loved him.

I wanted him more.

That I loved him.

I wanted him.

I love you.

I wanted to be with him.

I love you.

So say it.

"I love you Dean."


You said it.

You did it.

So what is he gonna do?

Nothing.

That's okay.

You assumed he'd do nothing.

You know him by now.

Everything is new to him.

He's feeling things he's never felt before.

But he hasn't pushed you off.

He isn't scared.

He just doesn't know what to do.

He knew what to do when he saw me after what my father did.

He knew what to do when my leg was bleeding.

He knew what to do and what to say.

He just doesn't know what to do now.

No one has told him they loved him before.

But the things he said.

The things he did.

The things he's seen.

He's never told someone he's loved them either.

He might not even realize he feels it.

That's okay.

He knows now.

So show him.

Teach him.

Prove it to him.

Prove it to yourself.

You've come so far.

Everything is different now.

So make it better.

He's seen you.

He's touched you.

He's keeping you.

Lean in.

There you go.

A little more.

A little more.

Feel his breath on your lips.

Feel his mouth.

Feel…

…his kiss.

…his tongue.

On yours…




….

The door appeared behind her.


The shadows absorbed the entire room and its color.


…I could still feel the serpent in my mouth.


The white door violently shook around in its frame.

The last remaining chain and lock rattled against the wood.

I couldn't move or run away.

I began to feel an immense heat on my skin.

When I tried to look at Becky, she was still a faceless shadow.

The heat stung my eyes, but I could not close them.

I could feel my tears boil in my eyelids.

As I looked back to the door, a powerful orange glow radiated through the cracks.

A thick plume of grey smoke pillowed out from the top.

The outer perimeter of the door becoming charred.

As the serpent went deeper and deeper inside my mouth, the shining silver chains began to glow.

The heat from behind the door began to melt the chain and lock.

I could feel the serpent jerk up and open my mouth wider.

And as my jaw snapped open, I could a hear a loud knock.

Quickly followed by another one, and another one.

The knocking didn't stop.

Louder and faster and harder as the heat and flames roared from behind the door.

The knocking becoming vicious thuds, trying to bust the door down.

The soft chains could barely hold anything back.

Underneath the knocks and thuds, I could hear it.

It's voice boiling.

Dean!

Most of the chain gave way.

Dean!

Its voice riddled with agony.

Dean!

A large black hand reached from behind the door. Leathery skin and claws scratching at the frame.

Dean!

The hand backed away.

The door was closed.

But the lock was now a puddle of metal on the ground.

The flames continued to roar and burst out.

But then as the serpent made its way all the down into the back of my throat, I could hear it again.

It's voice.

Rumbling and getting louder.

In between the crackling of the wood, its violent and heavy footsteps.

It was sprinting towards me.

Towards the door.

The serpent locked my neck stiff, forcing my attention to remain on it.

And on its final heavy thud, it became an explosion. Splintering and destroying the door.

…the flames erupted out…

…it just stood there…

…a black figure painted on a canvas of fire…

…I remembered…everything…

…it was them…this whole time…

…I know who you are…

…I missed you…

Dean!