NOTES: Needless to say, this is much later than I anticipated. The re-edit of Eidolon took much longer than I thought it would (by the way, if you haven't checked them out recently, the season 1 stories are getting a bit of a refresh), and life decided to life really hard the last few months.

Thank you to everyone who has read these additional 'episodes', left reviews, and/or clicked that 'favorite' button. Feedback is always welcome, and I love hearing from you!

As always, these scribbles were much improved thanks to my beta reader, Lyn.

This story starts a little before the end of the season three episode, Common Ground, and dialogue from the episode was written by Ken Cuperus.


"We've secured the location of Kolya's base," Ladon Radim said. "I'm forwarding you the dialling coordinates right now."

Rodney stared at the image of the Genii leader on the viewscreen, letting the rest of Elizabeth's conversation with Radim fade into the background.

Will it be the right planet this time? Rodney wondered as his mind replayed the video images of John tied to a chair and gagged as a hungry Wraith closed on him.

Three times, he mentally repeated over and over. Sheppard had been fed on by that Wraith three times. Three times Rodney had been forced to watch, unable to do anything, while Sheppard aged before his eyes as the Wraith sucked away his life.

That you know of, a corner of his mind whispered, remembering the last conversation between Kolya and the Wraith.

"Who told you to stop?" Kolya demanded.

"He is near death," the Wraith replied. It glanced from Sheppard to Kolya. "Shall I finish him?"

The transmission abruptly ended a moment later, and Rodney had stared at the dark video screen in a daze. John was only a year and a half older than he was, but the John Sheppard staring back at him through the camera lens had looked like a man of eighty.

"He is near death."

The phrase echoed in Rodney's mind as panic grew in his chest, and he suddenly found it hard to breathe.

"Are you certain this is where Colonel Sheppard is being held?" Elizabeth asked, and Rodney forced himself to pay attention to the conversation.

Sheppard's life depends on it, he told himself.

"Certain enough to send a full brigade through the portal," Radim replied. "It will take us an hour to marshal our forces." Radim paused. "I thought you might want that time."

It took Rodney a moment to realise what Radim was saying. He was giving them time to find Sheppard's body. Maybe even time to deal with the Wraith who had killed -

Rodney felt a shiver up his spine.

"He may already be past the point of no return. We know that a large percentage of those who survive a partial feeding die anyway due to complications as a result of strain on the system. What appears as physical ageing is actually a by-product of a complex process we barely understand."

Rodney replayed Carson's less-than-optimistic prognosis in his head, and he had a fleeting thought of Brendan Gall sitting in an abandoned Wraith ship telling him to go save the day right before he …

Rodney ducked his head. He didn't want to think about what Gall had done next.

He remembered telling John once that he couldn't keep watching Sheppard die. At the time, he had meant the statement more metaphorically, but that was precisely what he had been forced to do for the last day. Watch as John slowly died from a Wraith feeding from him.

Someone would need to go to Earth, Rodney realised. Even though John was estranged from his family, someone would need to talk to John's father and brother. Rodney told himself he would have to be the one to go. It might be easier to send a nameless Marine, but he'd never been one to take the easy way out. They wouldn't know or probably care that John had been his brother, too, his only family, but he owed it to John to talk to Sheppard's blood relations personally.

And tell them what? Rodney wondered. What would be the cover story to explain why a man, not even forty years old, died looking like he was eighty?

It was hard to breathe again, and Rodney forced down the growing sense of loss. He felt a gentle hand on his arm, glanced to his left, and saw Teyla watching him.

Then there was the team to consider, Rodney realised. Even if John survived the feeding, he would never lead a mission through the 'gate again. Would Sheppard be happy spending his remaining days, however many that turned out to be, in Atlantis? Would the SGC insist on him returning to Earth?

And what about missions? Who would Elizabeth assign as Sheppard's replacement? he wondered. Would he even want to continue going through the 'gate without John?

Rodney stood, staring at Radim on the video screen, thinking about who he could possibly work with in the field if not John when a different conversation rose in his mind.

"Due to the war with the Wraith, there were occasions when one half of a linked pair died before he or she could reach ascension."

"What happened … What happened to the one left behind?"

"A few were able to move on after a time," Yana replied, "but they were never the same. Most went mad from the loss."

Rodney crossed one arm over his chest and pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand.

The link, Rodney reminded himself. If John was dead, the link would be gone too. While the link and what it did had shocked him initially, over the last two years, it had become a part of him. He relied on that connection to Sheppard for more than just knowing when John might be hurt.

What would happen to him? Rodney wondered. If John really was dead, how long would he have before the loss of the link drove him insane?

No, John is still alive, Rodney mentally argued. How many times has Sheppard come back from the dead? he asked himself as a series of Sheppard's close calls swam through his memories.

A suicide run at a hive ship.

John nearly transformed into a hybrid iratus bug.

The hive ships exploding in front of him after the team had been kidnapped by Ford.

Not to mention John captured by angry natives on Mendar, and only a few months ago, escaping a culling on Haven.

Sheppard had survived all of that, Rodney told himself. He wouldn't die now. He wouldn't give the Wraith the satisfaction of killing him.

"A large percentage of those that survive a partial feeding die anyway due to complications as a result of strain on the system."

"I ask only that you leave Kolya for my own forces to find," Radim said.

Rodney jerked his head up and stared at the video screen.

Kolya.

He'd been so focused on the Wraith and John possibly dying that he'd forgotten about Kolya. Rodney absently rubbed his right arm as a new set of memories rose to the surface.

Kolya standing over him as one of his Genii goons held him down.

The Genii commander smiling as the knife sliced into his arm when Rodney refused to answer his questions about the plan to save Atlantis from a monster hurricane.

The last time they had encountered Kolya, John had thwarted his attempt to build a nuclear weapon by preventing the Genii commander from gaining access to the uranium necessary to complete the bomb and kidnapping Rodney to finish it for him.

Now, Kolya had taken John. Tortured him in a way that left Rodney's mind numb at the thought of how Sheppard had suffered. He felt Teyla squeeze his arm, looked up, and saw Elizabeth watching him. Rodney turned away before Elizabeth, or worse, Radim, saw the fear in his eyes.

The transmission ended a moment later.

Elizabeth took a deep breath, turned, and said, "All right, get a cloaked jumper and a team of Marines."

Rodney didn't need telling twice. He shook off Teyla's hand, turned, and walked out of the control room without a backward glance.

"I'd like to reserve one of those seats for a member of my medical team," Rodney heard Carson say behind him.

"He may already be past the point of no return."

Rodney felt another shiver down his spine and walked faster.

He ignored the people in the hallways outside the control room, trusting they would get out of his way. Armoury, he told himself. Gear up and get to the jumper bay. With luck, they could leave in the next five minutes.

Rodney wore a tac vest and reached for the Beretta lying on the table when Teyla and Ronon entered the room.

"Rodney? Are you all right?" Teyla asked as she pulled another vest off of a hanger and slipped it on.

"I'm fine," Rodney replied shortly, snapping a full magazine into the Beretta. He glanced around the room and frowned. "Where are the Marines?"

"Weir is talking to Lorne," Ronon replied as he checked the power cell for his blaster. "Should be here soon."

"We're not waiting all day for them," Rodney growled. "We need to go. Sheppard …" He paused and took a deep breath. "We need to find Sheppard."

"We will," Teyla replied.

Rodney glanced at her.

"We will find him," Teyla repeated. "And we will bring him home."

Rodney nodded and holstered the Beretta. He grabbed a spare magazine, stuffed it into one of his vest pockets and turned toward the door.

"Here," Ronon said, holding out a P-90.

Rodney shook his head. "I don't -"

"There is a Wraith and an unknown number of rogue Genii on the planet," Teyla said. "Ronon is correct." She took another P-90 from the rack and snapped a magazine into place. "We must be ready for anything."

"Fine." Rodney took the rifle, loaded it, and turned toward the door. "I'll be in the jumper bay prepping a ship."

He left the armoury, dodging around the group of Marines entering the room, and headed back to the control room and the stairs up to the jumper bay.

"Rodney," Elizabeth said, stepping in front of him as Rodney crossed the control room.

"I really need to go," Rodney countered. He tried to move around her, but Elizabeth blocked his way.

"This won't take long." Elizabeth turned, crossed the bridge to her office, and stood in the doorway, watching him.

Rodney clenched his jaw but followed her into the office and stood in front of her desk. So much for leaving in the next five minutes, he mentally grumbled.

"What?" Rodney growled as Elizabeth closed the office door and walked to her desk. "I need to get to the jumper bay."

"That's what I want to talk to you about," Elizabeth said, clasping her hands on the desk. "I'm not sure you should be going on this mission."

"What!" Rodney exclaimed, his frustration at the delay morphing into anger that she wanted to bench him. "Why not?"

Elizabeth glanced out the window toward the control room and frowned.

Rodney turned and saw Chuck watching them from the control console.

"I think you can guess why," Elizabeth said in a low voice. "If Colonel Sheppard is -"

"He still alive," Rodney ground out.

"And if he isn't?" Elizabeth countered. "You were the one standing in this office not two hours ago thinking he was already dead."

Rodney scowled at the reminder.

"You don't know what will happen with the link once you go through the 'gate," Elizabeth continued. "It might be better for the safety of the others if you stayed here."

Rodney stared at her, then glanced down at the silent 'gate. Elizabeth's argument was logical, but Rodney wasn't in the mood to listen to logic. This was one time he was willing to let emotions make his decisions.

"I need to do this," he told her. "I need to know."

"Rodney -"

"Maybe I can help him," Rodney spoke over her.

Elizabeth frowned and jerked her chin toward the control room.

Rodney glanced out the window, saw Chuck still watching them, and lowered his voice. "Maybe I can use the link the same way Sheppard used it to heal my hand."

"You've tried that before, and it didn't work," Elizabeth said.

Rodney had a flash memory of Sheppard getting shot and Rodney trying and failing to use the power in the link to heal the injury.

"A lot has happened since then. Maybe this time will be different," Rodney countered. He glanced out the window and saw Ronon and Teyla crossing the control room. "I need to go," he said, turning toward the door.

"Rodney," Elizabeth said.

Rodney clenched his hands. He didn't have time for this, he grumbled to himself but turned around.

"Be careful."

Rodney gave her a stiff nod and left the office.

"And bring John home," he heard Elizabeth whisper behind him.

Teyla and Ronon met him at the base of the stairs leading up to the jumper bay.

"Is everything all right?" Telya asked, glancing at the glassed-in office.

Rodney glanced at Elizabeth watching them, then shrugged and started up the stairs. "Elizabeth is concerned about the link," he muttered once they were alone outside the jumper bay.

Teyla frowned. "Perhaps -"

"Don't even say it," Rodney growled.

He stormed into the jumper bay and randomly selected one of the shuttles. Rodney barely waited for the rear ramp to completely lower before he entered the ship, dropped the P-90 on the bench seat in the rear section, entered the cockpit, and settled in the pilot's seat.

His hands hovered over the tiles, and he stared out the windscreen. This is so wrong, Rodney thought, even as Sheppard's voice in his head reminded him of everything he needed to do for the pre-flight checks.

Rodney shook his head and focused on the controls as he mechanically ran through Sheppard's list. He was aware of Teyla sitting next to him in the co-pilot's seat and Ronon standing behind her as he double-checked the various systems. A few minutes later, he heard a clatter behind him, twisted around in his seat, and saw Beckett enter the jumper carrying a large backpack emblazoned with a red cross.

"The Marines are right behind me," Carson said as he walked into the cockpit.

"Good," Rodney growled. "The sooner everyone decides to show up, the sooner we can find Sheppard."

"Rodney," Carson started to say, and Rodney caught Teyla shaking her head at Beckett from the corner of his eye.

Carson pressed his lips into a thin line and sat behind Rodney without another word.

Rodney gripped the control sticks so hard his knuckles turned white. Why wouldn't people just leave it alone, he mentally screamed. Did they think he wasn't aware of what they might find? Did they think he wasn't half out of his mind with worry and fear? Worry about Sheppard. Fear as to what would happen to him if John were dead.

"Reporting as ordered, sir," a voice said behind him.

Rodney turned and saw a tall Marine standing in the doorway separating the cockpit from the rear section. Rodney shifted his gaze and saw four more men stowing their gear in the overhead netting.

"Finally," Rodney replied. He pressed a tile, sealing the rear hatch.

He waited just long enough for the Marines to find seats on the benches in the rear section, then keyed in the 'gate address Ladon Radim had given them.

The jumper rose into the air, floated toward the opening in the floor, and dropped into the gateroom. The wormhole shimmered in front of them, and Elizabeth stood with her hands clenched on the railing overlooking the gateroom.

"Rodney, Teyla, Ronon," she said over the radio. "Good luck."

Teyla glanced at Rodney, then tapped her earpiece. "Thank you, Doctor Weir. We will return as quickly as possible."

The jumper shot through the event horizon and, moments later, exited the 'gate on an unnamed planet.

"I'd say we're in the right place," Carson said as a group of Genii soldiers opened fire on the jumper.

"Engaging the cloak," Rodney said. He pressed a tile and pulled back on the control sticks.

The Genii stopped firing as the ship gained altitude and vanished.

Once clear of the weapon's fire, Rodney hovered the ship over the forest and studied the tree canopy.

"It's a big planet," Carson said. "Where are we supposed to look for this base, then?"

The HUD appeared on the windscreen, and Rodney saw close to a dozen blue dots surrounding a red dot a dozen kilometers from their location. As he watched, the blue dots started disappearing.

"What's going on down there?" Carson asked from the seat behind Rodney.

Good question, Rodney thought. He studied the HUD and felt the knot in his gut ease.

"Well, one of them is definitely Sheppard." Rodney pointed to the red dot surrounded by quickly disappearing blue dots on the screen. "His subcutaneous transmitter's still broadcasting."

The last of the blue dots vanished, leaving a single blue dot alongside Sheppard's red dot.

If he's still able to kill that many Genii, Rodney thought as he stared at the screen, then maybe Carson was wrong. Maybe John would beat the odds once again.

"Could the other remaining dot be Kolya?" Teyla asked as both dots moved across the screen.

"Let's hope so," Ronon growled.

Rodney gave Ronon a startled glance.

"Land a hundred meters south of their position," Ronon ordered.

Rodney swallowed, nodded, and arced the shuttle in a slow turn, setting them on a course for Sheppard's location.

They had only been on their new heading for a few moments when more blue dots appeared on the screen and surrounded Sheppard's red dot.

Rodney felt a frigid blanket settle over him and an increased pressure in his skull.

He gasped and tried to hide the involuntary shiver as he grasped the flight controls in a tighter grip.

Pull yourself together, Rodney silently ordered as waves of fear and anger battered against his mind along with the pain and cold.

The feeling of cold and the vise-like pressure increased the closer they flew toward Sheppard's location, and Rodney wasn't sure how much longer he could hide how much pain he was in.

Another wave of fear hit him, and he groaned low in his throat.

"Rodney," Teyla whispered, and Rodney felt Teyla's hand on his arm.

Rodney shook his head and tried to focus on the trees sailing past below them.

"Going to go brief the Marines," Ronon said and stood. A moment later, Rodney heard the bulkhead door close.

Rodney squeezed his eyes shut as the vise-like pressure increased. He heard Teyla hiss in a breath and opened his eyes.

Thanks to his inattention, the jumper had dipped, and they were perilously close to the tree canopy. Rodney groaned louder and pulled back on the control sticks. The ship regained altitude and levelled off high above the trees.

"Doctor Beckett," Teyla said, glancing at Carson.

"I don't know, lass," Carson replied. He knelt next to Rodney's chair and added, "Rodney? Talk to me, lad."

"The link," Rodney replied with another groan.

He saw Teyla and Carson exchange a worried glance.

"A spike?" Teyla asked.

Rodney shook his head and shivered again. "Different," he ground out as the pain increased.

Rodney thought of the eighty-year-old man wearing Sheppard's uniform and shuddered. John was dying, he realised. That's what the link was telling him. They were too late.

"Perhaps Doctor Beckett should take over," Teyla suggested.

Before Rodney could reply, the pressure in his head doubled, and he couldn't breathe. The feeling of anger had ebbed, but the fear was still there, now laced with resignation.

Rodney closed his eyes and moaned. He released the controls and listed to one side as he cradled his head in his hands. A corner of his mind screamed at him to regain control of the ship before it crashed, but the larger part was overwhelmed by the pain, the cold, the fact he couldn't breathe, and the sudden realisation that the emotions he was feeling weren't his.

"Doctor Beckett!" Teyla exclaimed as if from down a long tunnel.

Rodney felt something bang into the pilot's seat a moment later. He opened his eyes and watched the jumper level off just above the tops of the trees. Rodney glanced to his right and saw Carson standing beside him, gripping the control sticks as he stared out the windscreen.

"See if you can move him out of the way," Carson's voice wafted across the pain in Rodney's head.

The bulkhead door opened and closed, and Rodney was vaguely aware of Ronon lifting him out of the pilot's seat and dropping him into another chair. He curled in the seat and closed his eyes, hovering on the edge of consciousness as he panted and shivered.

"What happened?" Ronon asked.

"I suspect the mental link is reacting to Colonel Sheppard's condition," Carson replied.

"That would mean Colonel Sheppard …"

"Aye, lass," Carson said, and Rodney heard the depth of sadness in his tone. "If Rodney's reaction is anything to go by, I believe we are too late."

"Get us on the ground, Doc," Ronon ordered.

"Aye," Carson replied. A moment later, he added. "We're nearly to Sheppard's last known location, I think."

Rodney kept his breathing shallow and felt himself drifting as his world was reduced to the feeling of intense cold and the pressure in his skull. So this is how it ends, the analytical part of his brain thought. Sheppard is dead, or at least at the brink, and your last sane moments are filled with freezing pain.

Pull yourself together, he ordered himself. If you plan to use the link to save John, you have to be conscious. Rodney shifted in his seat, cracked his eyes open, and forced himself to ignore the pain and waves of fear. He took a deeper breath and silently watched his teammates as the jumper flew over the tree canopy.

Ronon stood behind Teyla's chair, his right arm braced on one of the overhead beams, staring out the windscreen. Rodney had Dex's face in profile, but it was enough for him to see the rigid set of Ronon's jaw and how his left hand reflexively clenched and unclenched as they flew over the trees.

Teyla divided her attention between watching the HUD and glancing at Beckett. There wasn't much she could do to assist with flying the ship, but Rodney heard her murmured suggestions for Carson to adjust their course as they closed on the area with the blinking red dot.

The only part of Carson Rodney could see was the back of Beckett's head. Carson sat at rigid attention, and Rodney imagined he had a white-knuckle grip on the flight controls. Each time Teyla suggested a course correction, Beckett gave her a minute nod and adjusted their trajectory.

None of them paid any attention to him, something Rodney was grateful for. He didn't need an audience if he was about to completely lose it.

The transmitter is still active, Rodney thought, watching the blinking red dot. That meant Sheppard was still alive, didn't it? Rodney tried to concentrate and understand what the link was telling him. As far as he could tell, nothing had changed. His head still pounded. He was still cold, and the feelings of fear mixed with anger and resignation were still there.

John's emotions, Rodney realised with a start. He was feeling what John was feeling. As if watching Koyla torture Sheppard wasn't enough, Rodney suddenly realised he was sharing John's final emotions as Sheppard stood at the brink of death.

"There is a clearing," Teyla said, pointing out the windscreen. She looked up at the HUD. "And it appears to be near Colonel Sheppard's location."

"I see it," Carson replied. He bent forward in the pilot's seat, and the jumper started its descent.

The ship landed a few minutes later, and Ronon opened the bulkhead door. A corner of Rodney's mind noted that Ronon stood in such a way that he blocked anyone in the rear section from seeing into the cockpit.

The spicy scent of pine trees and the earthy smell of fresh dirt wafted across Rodney's nose, and he assumed Carson had lowered the rear hatch.

"We'll look around," Ronon said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. He glanced at Teyla and nodded in Rodney's direction.

Teyla nodded back, and Dex walked into the rear section.

"Perimeter sweep," Dex ordered, and Rodney heard the clomp of boots against the rear hatch a few seconds later.

"Should I leave the cloak engaged?" Carson asked.

"Yes," Teyla replied. "We do not want the Genii," she glanced at Rodney, "or the Wraith finding the ship."

Carson nodded, and the remaining ship systems powered down a few moments later.

Teyla stood, squeezed Rodney's shoulder, glanced at Beckett, and walked into the rear section.

Beckett moved from the pilot's seat to Rodney's side and crouched before him. "Rodney, how are you doing, lad?" he asked, reaching for Rodney's wrist.

"How do you think?" Rodney grumbled.

Carson frowned and let go of his wrist. "Your pulse is fast. How bad is the pain? One to ten?"

Rodney crossed his arms over his chest and tried not to shiver. "Eight," he muttered. "Maybe an nine."

"You should lie down in the back. We can -"

"Perimeter's clear," Ronon reported, walking into the cockpit.

Carson looked up and nodded. "You lot go ahead. I'll stay here with Rodney."

"What about Sheppard?"

Carson glanced at Rodney, but before he could say anything, Rodney pushed himself to his feet. The room swayed as he moved, and he grabbed the back of the chair for balance.

"I'm going with you."

"Rodney, don't be a fool. You can barely stand," Carson countered.

Rodney braced one hand on the bulkhead and glared up at Ronon standing in the doorway.

Ronon glanced from Rodney to Carson, then backed out of the way.

"You were a lot of help," Carson groused at Ronon as Rodney shuffled into the rear section and picked up his P-90. "He's in no fit state to be wandering around."

"Don't have time to waste arguing," Ronon replied. He pushed past Rodney and walked out of the jumper.

Rodney staggered down the ramp and stood with one hand braced against the side of the ship. He used his other hand to shield his eyes from the morning sunlight stabbing into his aching head, and stared at the surrounding pine trees.

The Marines stood at regular intervals, weapons at the ready, watching the surrounding forest. Rodney thought he saw two trees growing from a single trunk and rubbed his eyes.

"What the …" he muttered, studying the strange double tree. No one else seemed to notice the weird tree, and Rodney chalked the illusion up to the headache.

Ronon walked over to the sergeant in charge of the Marines. "Anything?" he asked, looking around.

"Still clear," the Marine replied.

There wasn't a breeze, but Rodney zipped his jacket nearly to his chin as another wave of cold crawled up his spine.

A Marine standing not far from Rodney glanced at him and frowned. "Are you all right, sir? You don't look so good."

"Fine," Rodney told him. He pushed off the side of the ship and silently ordered his legs to keep him upright just a little while longer.

"Let's go," Ronon said, taking point.

"You heard the man," the sergeant next to Ronon said. "Move out Marines!"

Rodney waited until the Marines fell in behind Ronon, then shuffled along at the rear of their procession with Carson beside him. Teyla walked a few steps in front of them, watching the trees and occasionally glancing at Rodney.

No birds chirped overhead, and Rodney didn't hear any scurrying of animals through the sparse undergrowth. Other than their footsteps on the dirt path, the only sound was the low drone of insects in the nearby scrub.

Ronon and the Marines crept through the thinning trees, watching the path and the forest, alert for any movement. Their slow but steady progress was maddening for Rodney. On one hand, the slow pace allowed him to keep up, even as every step jarred his aching head. On the other hand, he knew from the link they were out of time.

"Contact," one of the Marines whispered, holding up a closed fist.

Rodney stumbled to a halt as the Marines fanned out around him.

"Where?" Ronon asked, crouching low.

"Ahead, twenty paces," the Marine replied. "Body on the ground."

Rodney swallowed. This is it, he thought. Sheppard really is -

"Appears to be Genii," the Marine finished, and Rodney blew out a breath.

Carson glanced at him, and Rodney shook his head.

A moment later, a piercing scream cut through the trees.

"Move!" Ronon shouted and ran into the trees, out-pacing the Marines, who scrambled to keep up with Dex.

Rodney started to follow, only to gasp out a breath and stagger into Carson a moment later.

"Rodney?" Carson asked, grabbing Rodney's arm and keeping him upright. "What's wrong?"

Rodney shook his head. He pressed his hands to his temples, then stood straight and stared at Carson.

"It's gone," Rodney murmured. He shook off Carson's hold on his arm and stared into the trees where Ronon and the Marines had disappeared.

"Sorry?"

"The link -"

"The link is gone?" Carson interrupted. He gave Teyla a startled look and reached for Rodney's arm.

"We need to go," Rodney said and tore after Ronon.

Rodney, Carson, and Teyla caught up to Dex and the Marines just as they ran into another clearing. Several bodies lay on the ground, and a Wraith crouched over another victim.

Rodney stopped short, staring at the bodies. A quick glance was all he needed. None of the bodies could be John. They all wore Genii uniforms.

So does that mean … Rodney turned and stared at the Wraith. From how the link had reacted once they were on the planet, Rodney was certain Sheppard wasn't in any condition to run.

That's why the headache and the icy cold feeling were gone, he realised. That's why he no longer felt the waves of fear. They were too late.

Rodney had barely reached his conclusion when Ronon yanked the Wraith away from the person on the ground with a growl. The Wraith hissed as it tumbled across the clearing and stopped only a few paces from Rodney.

Dex blocked Rodney's view of the body, but looking at the desiccated remains of the Genii surrounding them, he had a good idea of what the Wraith had been doing.

The Wraith rolled to its feet, staying low with its hands spread away from its body.

Three Marines standing nearby pointed their weapons at the Wraith. Two more stood on the other side of the clearing, checking the bodies on the ground.

Rodney swallowed hard and aimed his P-90 at the Wraith.

The Wraith growled low in its throat, looking one way and then another, and Rodney hoped that if it was about to escape, it didn't try to go through him to do it. Could he do it? he wondered? Could he kill someone who was unarmed, even if it was a Wraith? John was likely dead, he reminded himself. Dead because of the Wraith huddled in front of him.

Rodney swallowed and tightened his grip on the P-90. He heard Ronon's low growl, glanced at Dex, and saw Ronon aim the particle weapon at the Wraith.

The Wraith crouched lower, glanced at Rodney and the Marines, then focused on Dex. Rodney saw the Wraith shift its weight and tightened his finger on the P-90's trigger.

"Wait!" a familiar voice shouted from behind Ronon.

Rodney felt a jolt in his stomach and stared in disbelief as Sheppard, a normal Sheppard, not artificially aged, and more importantly, not dead, rose and stood behind Dex.

"Leave him!" Sheppard added, glancing at the Wraith.

The Wraith gave Sheppard a puzzled glance.

Ronon held his aim on the Wraith and shook his head.

"That's an order," Sheppard growled at Dex.

Ronon held his aim for a few more seconds, then lowered the particle weapon.

"I don't understand," Carson said as he lowered his Beretta.

That makes two of us, Rodney silently added, still staring at Sheppard.

"We all saw what he did to you," Beckett finished.

"He just undid it," John replied. "Lower your weapons," he ordered the Marines.

The Marines hesitated, then exchanged confused glances as they lowered their guns.

Teyla stepped forward. "How is this possible?"

John shrugged. "Don't ask me."

The Wraith watched the Marines, then glanced at Rodney and Carson before slowly lowering its arms, straightening, and turning to John.

"The gift of life is reserved only for our most devout worshippers … and our brothers." It glanced at Teyla and added, "Sheppard gave me back my life. I merely repaid the debt."

Rodney listened to the exchange in stunned silence.

In the course of a day, he had watched his best friend, his brother, age before his eyes as John was tortured by a madman. Standing in front of the screen, watching the Wraith feeding on John, had been a different sort of torture for Rodney, true, but torture just the same.

Which was probably Kolya's intention, Rodney grumbled to himself.

Yet here was John, seemingly perfectly fine, standing before him, telling them not to kill the Wraith who had caused all of their suffering. While Rodney was grateful Sheppard had dodged death once again, the residual feelings of helplessness, not to mention feeling Sheppard near death and the agonising pain from the link, were still fresh in his mind.

Before Rodney could stop it, the first thing he thought of popped out of his mouth, "Are you kidding?" he asked, glaring at the Wraith and then Sheppard. "I mean, he looks younger than he did before!"

Carson and Teyla stared at him, and Rodney felt Beckett's elbow dig into his ribs. "Rodney," Carson hissed.

"What? It's true!"

Ronon shook his head and focused on John. "What about Kolya?"

Rodney started at the name and glanced at the trees. How could you forget about Kolya? he chastised himself, half-expecting the Genii commander to strut out of the forest and order the Wraith to feed on all of them.

John patted his jacket pockets, then turned and scooped a radio off the ground. "Kolya, this is Sheppard." John waited a moment, then added, "Kolya?"

Rodney blew out a silent breath and relaxed when Sheppard didn't receive a response. After everything else that had happened, he wasn't looking forward to a confrontation with Kolya too.

"I figured you'd run," John growled into the radio. "Next time I kill you on sight, you hear me?"

John glared at the radio, then narrowed his eyes as he tossed it aside. "Let's get off this rock," he said to Ronon.

No argument from me, Rodney silently thought.

"What about him?" Ronon asked, glaring at the Wraith.

The Wraith grunted as it glanced from Ronon to Sheppard. Rodney wondered if it was considering making a break for it even though it was surrounded by Marines.

John studied the Wraith, then took the particle weapon from Dex, stepped forward, and shot the Wraith in the chest.

The Wraith fell, unmoving, and lay on the ground.

Ronon took the blaster, gazed at it and then at the Wraith. "You didn't kill it," he growled.

"No, I didn't," John replied, walking over to Rodney. "Get him in the jumper," he ordered the Marines. "We'll drop him off somewhere."

Ronon shook his head, holstering the particle weapon as the Marines stepped forward and picked up the Wraith.

"Thanks for showing up," John added, pushing past Rodney as he followed the Marines.

Rodney stared at John's back in stunned silence. Was John being sarcastic or sincere? he wondered. After the day he'd had, he wasn't in any shape to parse out emotional nuance. He started to say something in reply, but John was already walking away from him.

"Come on, lad," Carson said, tugging Rodney's arm. "Let's go home."

Rodney only vaguely paid attention to where he was going as he followed the rest of the group back to the jumper. Now that he knew Sheppard was alive and surprisingly well, he had time to think about not only what had happened to John but how the link had reacted to Sheppard nearly dying.

Over the last two years, he had grown used to the pain spikes and headaches whenever John was injured. The way the link had reacted to the Wraith feeding on Sheppard had been different. The pressure in his skull and the cold was one thing, but he had felt John's emotions as he was dying. A shiver ran down Rodney's spine.

That was new.

Was he going to start experiencing John's other feelings? Rodney wondered. Would Sheppard now know all of Rodney's inner secrets and fears? Or had this been an extreme reaction to an extreme situation?

The thought of John knowing what he was thinking or feeling all the time was almost as scary to Rodney as experiencing Sheppard's near death.

Then, there was the problem of telling John about the reaction. After Yana's revelation about the link's true purpose, they had made a pact to tell the other if the link did anything new or different.

How do I even bring it up? Rodney wondered as he walked. 'Oh, by the way, not only did I get to watch you slowly dying, but I actually felt it,' seemed a little blunt even for him.

Even after two years and everything they had been through, Rodney knew Sheppard was more inclined to stuff his problems into boxes than admit he might need help. Rodney suspected John would not take it well when he found out Rodney had been an unwitting voyeur to his near-death.

Rodney frowned and rubbed the back of his head as he debated with himself what to do.

"Rodney?" Carson asked. "Are you all right?"

"Hmm?" Rodney glanced at Beckett and saw his concerned expression. "I'm fine. Just thinking."

Rodney waited until Beckett looked away, then rubbed his right arm and continued his internal debate.

Of course, all of this assumed John would want to talk about what Kolya and the Wraith had done, Rodney reminded himself. He glanced at John's stiff posture as he walked beside Ronon at the head of their group.

Maybe wait a few days, Rodney decided. Delay the inevitable fallout as long as possible.

Decision made, Rodney let the late morning sun warm his face as he walked. It felt good after the numbing cold he'd felt before they found Sheppard.

Ten minutes later, Rodney was beginning to wonder where they had left the jumper when he heard Carson muttering about something.

" … but where?" Carson said.

Rodney glanced at Beckett. "What?"

"Sorry?" Carson replied, glancing at Rodney with a distracted expression.

Rodney shook his head. "What are you muttering about?"

"Oh." Carson pressed his lips into a thin line. "It's that Wraith," he explained, pointing at the inert body carried by two Marines. "He looks familiar."

Rodney studied the Wraith, then shrugged. "If you say so."

"I know I've seen him before."

"Doc?" John said. He held up a hand, and the Marines stopped walking. "What's the problem?"

"Not a problem, Colonel. Just a puzzle."

John studied the trees as he walked back to Carson and Rodney.

"Carson, what's going on?" Sheppard asked. "Did you see something in the trees? More Genii?"

"No, no, nothing like that," Carson replied. He pointed to the Wraith. "I know I've seen that Wraith before. I just can't remember where."

John shook his head. "Don't think that's possible. I got the impression Kolya had had him in that cell for years. Decades, maybe. Certainly longer than we've been in Atlantis."

Carson frowned. "I know I've seen him somewhere."

"Even if you have, the middle of hostile territory isn't the place to figure it out," John replied with another wary glance at the trees.

Rodney flinched at the reminder there might still be Genii after them and peered through the trees.

"Yes, yes, of course, you're right," Carson said. "As I said, it's a puzzle."

Sheppard glanced from Carson to the Wraith, then made a circling motion with his hand. "Move out."

The Marines traded off carrying the Wraith, and they continued the hike back to the jumper.

Assuming we're going the right way, Rodney grumbled to himself. He had no memory of the trip from the ship to where they had heard Sheppard scream, and all the trees looked the same.

"We're here," Ronon said when they entered another clearing a few minutes later.

"Are you sure?" Carson asked, patting his vest pockets.

"Ronon is correct," Teyla replied. "I remember that doubled tree."

Rodney glanced to his right and saw two trees growing from a single trunk. "Huh. So it was real."

Teyla glanced at him with a raised eyebrow, and Rodney shook his head.

Carson pulled a remote control out of his vest pocket and pushed a button. The air a few meters in front of them briefly shimmered before the jumper appeared. Carson pushed another button, and the rear hatch opened.

Rodney stepped toward the lowered ramp, eager to leave the planet as soon as possible.

"Where do you think you're going?" John asked.

Rodney stopped at the bottom of the ramp. "Where do you think," he replied, stepping onto the ramp.

"No, you're not. You need to dial the 'gate and go home."

"I plan to. From inside the jumper."

"The jumper isn't going back to Atlantis. You are," John replied.

Rodney crossed his arms over his chest. "Excuse me?" he demanded.

"Colonel Sheppard?" Teyla said at the same time.

"You heard me." John glanced at the Marine beside him and jerked his chin toward the rear ramp. "Get him loaded," he ordered.

"Yes, sir," the Marine replied.

Rodney scowled and stepped out of the way as the Marines carried the Wraith aboard the jumper.

"If you aren't coming with us, where pray tell are you off to, then?" Carson asked.

John pointed at the ship. "I'm going to deal with him."

"Deal with him?" Rodney asked. He glanced into the jumper and watched the Marines settle the Wraith on one of the bench seats. "Deal with him how?"

"Should have done that before," Ronon said, fingering the particle weapon.

"Not like that," John said to Dex. "We made a deal, and I plan to honor it."

"Why?" Ronon growled. "It wouldn't hesitate to kill all of us if given the chance."

"So leave him here," Rodney countered. "He won't be stunned for long. He can leave when he wakes up."

"And give him a chance to find the address to Atlantis in the DHD buffer?" Sheppard countered, glaring at Rodney.

Rodney scowled but knew John had a point. Michael had known about Atlantis, but hopefully, any Wraith he had passed that information along to were now dead. No reason to give more Wraith the chance to attack the city.

"You intend to leave the Wraith on another planet," Teyla said.

"Yes," John replied. "One we know is occupied by the Wraith." He glanced at Rodney and added, "That's why you aren't coming."

"Where do you intend to take him?" Teyla asked.

"The same planet Michael took you," Sheppard replied. "We know the Wraith are building some sort of stronghold in that valley not far from the 'gate. I'll drop him off there and be back through the 'gate before the Wraith know we were there." He turned to Rodney. "I'm going to need that," he said, pointing to the P-90.

"Unbelievable," Rodney grumbled. After everything he'd been through trying to save John, he couldn't believe Sheppard wanted to ditch him. He unclipped the rifle from his vest and held it out to Sheppard.

John took the weapon and walked over to the ramp.

"You're just going to leave us here?" Rodney asked. "It's twelve kilometers back to the 'gate. What if Kolya and his Genii soldiers are still here?"

"That's why the Marines are staying here with you," John replied.

Rodney gaped. Surely, he had heard that wrong. "Are you insane?"

"I think what Rodney is trying to say is, are you certain you want to do this by yourself?" Teyla asked.

"He won't be going alone," Ronon said.

John glanced at Ronon. "I don't need company."

Ronon crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Sheppard.

"Fine," John acquiesced. "Come if you want."

The Marines exited the jumper and stood near the edge of the clearing.

"Prisoner is secured, sir," one of the Marines said.

"Thank you, Sergeant," John replied.

Rodney opened his mouth, but John raised his hand. "No more argument. Get back to Atlantis. Tell Elizabeth we'll be back inside a day."

John walked up the ramp with Ronon behind him. A few seconds later, the rear hatch sealed, and the jumper took off, circled the clearing, and then disappeared over the trees in the direction of the stargate.

"Of all the stupid, reckless plans you've had over the years, this one might top the list," Rodney muttered under his breath as he watched the jumper disappear in the distance.

"Sir?" the Marine standing nearby asked.

"Nothing," Rodney replied.

"We should not stay here," Teyla said with a glance at the Marine sergeant.

The sergeant nodded. "Let's go. Standard formation."

One of the Marines took point. Teyla, Rodney, and Carson followed the sergeant, and the remaining Marines brought up the rear.

"He could have at least dropped us at the 'gate," Rodney muttered as they walked. "I did not need a hike on top of the rest of my day."

Carson gave him a worried glance, but Rodney shook his head as he followed the Marines.

They stopped at the edge of another clearing a few hours later, and the Marine sergeant held up a hand.

"Perimeter check," he said in a low voice. He pointed to one of the Marines behind Rodney and added, "Stay with the civilians."

"Yes, Sergeant," the Marine replied.

The Marines inched through the last of the trees, and a moment later, the sergeant called over the radio, "All clear."

Teyla led the way into the empty clearing, and Rodney blew out a breath.

"Where did the Genii disappear to, I wonder," Carson said.

"If Commander Kolya survived and escaped as Colonel Sheppard suspects, they likely left the planet when he did," Teyla replied.

Rodney felt a shiver down his back at the reminder that, once again, Kolya had slppped through their fingers as he walked over to the DHD and began dialling the address for Atlantis.

The wormhole formed, and Rodney sent his IDC. "We're cleared to return," he announced a moment later.

The Marines stood to one side as Teyla and Carson walked toward the event horizon. Rodney stepped through the 'gate behind them and wasn't surprised when he saw Elizabeth waiting for them in the gateroom.

"Rodney, Carson, Teyla," Elizabeth greeted and nodded to the Marines. "We were getting worried something had happened." She glanced at the 'gate and frowned when the wormhole closed a moment later. "Where is the jumper? And where are Colonel Sheppard and Ronon?"

Rodney snorted, and Elizabeth frowned.

"Colonel Sheppard is dealing with a … personal matter," Teyla replied. "He said to tell you he will return as soon as it is complete."

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes. "Does this personal matter involve Commander Kolya?"

"No," Teyla replied. "We never saw him. Commander Kolya had likely left the planet by the time we found Colonel Sheppard."

"Then where -"

"Sheppard decided the Wraith needed a ride home," Rodney retorted with a scowl.

"Rodney," Carson chastised.

"I don't understand," Elizabeth said, glancing from Rodney to Teyla and Carson.

"It seems Colonel Sheppard and the Wraith had some sort of arrangement," Teyla explained. "Colonel Sheppard is merely fulfilling his side of the bargain."

"I see. In that case, we will debrief once Colonel Sheppard and Ronon return." Elizabeth glanced at each of them in turn. "Good work. All of you," she added, then climbed the stairs to the control room.

Teyla nodded and walked toward the exit. Rodney started to follow when Carson tapped his arm. "You need to come to the infirmary," he whispered. "I want to make sure there's nothing amiss after what happened in the jumper."

Rodney grimaced but nodded and followed Carson out of the gateroom and down the hall to the transporter.

Rodney walked into the infirmary and watched Sharon and Dana pace between the beds, each with a privacy screen separating the beds from their neighbors, lined along the far side of the room.

Dana glanced up as the infirmary door opened, saw Rodney, and Rodney saw her eyes crinkle above the mask she wore. Rodney assumed she was smiling behind the mask. Dana gave him a tiny wave and turned turned back to the Marine lying in the bed beside her.

Rodney gave her a hesitant wave and scowled when he heard Carson chuckle beside him.

"Come on," Carson said, smiling and tapping Rodney's arm. "Stop flirting with my nurses."

Rodney had a denial on the tip of his tongue but frowned when he heard a loud sneeze from the other side of the room. He glanced across the room and saw Dana handing the Marine a tissue.

"The one place you're guaranteed to get sick is a doctor's office," Rodney grumbled to himself as he followed Carson to a bed near the door.

"Doctor Beckett," Sharon greeted. She removed her mask as she walked over to their side of the room, glancing at Rodney. "Is everything all right?"

"Fine, fine, my dear," Carson replied. He glanced at the row of beds lined along the far wall. "Serefina sent Tsao and Sergeant Garcia back to quarters?"

Sharon glanced across the room. "Yes. Both were doing much better. Sergeant Thompson also reported that the rest of his team has recovered, and Doctor Zelenka informed us that he and several scientists are also on the mend."

Carson nodded. "Of all the potential diseases someone could bring back to the city, it's a new Marine with Earth-borne influenza that causes the problem." He shook his head. "What about the Daedalus?"

"Colonel Caldwell reported a few cases among his crew, but they should be able to continue on to Earth instead of returning here."

Sharon glanced at Rodney and then the infirmary door. "Colonel Sheppard …"

"He's just fine," Carson replied. "He's dealing with a situation and should be back soon."

Sharon frowned. "Wasn't he fed on by a Wraith? How is that possible?"

"It's a long story," Carson replied. "Rest assured, I will be running plenty of tests once he returns to try and answer that very question."

Carson waited until Sharon walked across the room to check on the flu patients, then turned to Rodney. "All right, up you get," he said, pointing at the bed.

Rodney sat on the edge of the infirmary bed and crossed his arms over his chest. "I feel fine now."

Carson ignored him as he checked Rodney's pulse and listened to his breathing and heart.

"Have you ever had that bad of a spike before?" he asked softly as he wrapped a blood pressure cuff around Rodney's arm.

"It wasn't a spike," Rodney said, wincing as the cuff tightened around his arm. "It felt more like someone was squeezing my head."

Carson glanced at him with a frown. "Hmm. Your blood pressure is elevated," he reported as he ripped the velcro and removed the cuff, "but you don't seem to be any the worse for wear."

Carson sat on the stool next to the bed and glanced at Sharon, busy with one of the Marines on the other side of the room. "Was there anything else unusual?" he whispered.

How much should he say? Rodney wondered, picking at the edge of the mattress. Should he talk to John before telling Carson, not to mention Teyla, Ronon, Elizabeth, and Zelenka, about feeling John's fear and anger? About sensing how close John was to death?

"Rodney?" Carson prodded and tapped Rodney's knee.

"Hmm?"

"What else happened while we were planet-side?"

Rodney stared at Beckett, then crossed his arms over his chest. "The, umm, the reaction from the link. It was different."

One of the Marines started coughing on the other side of the room. Sharon said something to the woman and, once the fit passed, offered her a cup of water.

Rodney glanced at the corner, half-hoping Carson would check on the Marine and leave the questions about the link for another time.

"Yes, I gathered that from the fact you were barely conscious in the jumper," Carson replied, ignoring the activity on the other side of the room.

So much for getting a distraction, Rodney mentally sighed.

"How was it different?" Carson pressed.

Rodney studied Beckett, then decided to tell part of the story. Just enough to get Carson to leave it alone for now, he told himself.

He watched Sharon walk back to her desk, then leaned forward and said, "I got, umm, cold. Really cold. That had never happened before. And it was hard to breathe."

Carson frowned and reached for the stethoscope. "Are you having breathing problems now?"

Rodney shook his head.

"Anything else?"

Rodney hesitated. "Umm, no. Just the squeezing in my head and feeling like I'd never be warm again."

Carson stared at him, and Rodney wondered if Beckett was about to call him on the white lie.

"All right," Carson said and stood. "You seem fine enough now. Come see me if you start to notice any problems."

Rodney hopped off the bed. "Umm, thanks, Carson."

"You're welcome, lad," Carson replied as Rodney walked toward the infirmary door.

Rodney stopped in the armoury long enough to return the Beretta and shed his tac vest, then headed for the mess hall. He was sure Carson had seen through his attempted obfuscation and wondered how long Beckett would wait before bringing up his suspicions with Sheppard.

"So much for waiting," he muttered as he walked into the mess hall and grabbed a tray. He still didn't know how he would broach the topic with Sheppard, but they had more than a few things to discuss once John returned to the city.