A/N: I was taking an exam today and I remembered one skit from Nostalgia Critic's "Lara Croft: Tomb Raider" Review so I had to write this up with Aster as I can actually see him doing this shit when he is bored.
Steven Astro Billy Bob Johnson II was just an ordinary man that was looking for a way to get a quick buck as he was short on money. Why? He owed the Mafia a good 3 grand so he could open up a good number of booster packs because there was a card that he really needed it, but he didn't get anything valuable.
Sure, it may seem silly, but when Seto Kaiba made a whole school to learn about this game, that investment was actually quite smart on his part.
A shame that he had worse luck than a man that opened up an umbrella inside of a house that scared a black cat which made it to dart under a ladder which fell and broke a mirror, reflecting the Sun's Rays to burn down a whole field of 4 Leaf Clovers.
Now, he had an idea of how to get back at the Mafia. He didn't plan to kill them, he didn't have a weapon on him at all, but to break into a rich dude's house, walk around, steal his worthy and pricey stuff, look into their possible Duel Monsters cards which might be worth than an entire house and then give them to the Mafia.
It might seem farfetched, but it was worth a shot.
He didn't want to die by the hands of the Mafia.
Steven looked at the mansion that was silver as the legendary dragon's skin as he looked on with a proud grin on his face, ready to get as much stuff as humanly possible before the cops get to him. Not to mention, there were no lights which showed that there was noone there, making it the perfect place to get something.
Steven grabbed his ski mask and applied to his face, he was ready to steal from a rich dude.
Steven walked towards the door and placed his hands on the handl-
"Wait a sec, this is unlocked? Well this should be easy." said Steven as what kind of a moron would leave their door unlocked. Did they want their house to be robbed? This moron would lose all of his stuff stolen today. Steven walked into the living room with the confidence of a Hero, "Now, let's see what this dude ha-"
Fingers were snapped as then Steven froze as he saw the lights come back on.
His eyes widened in horror.
Sitting in the living room was Aster Phoenix with a crazy look on his face, legs spread out with his elbows on his knees, as on the table was a massive bag of money with dollars signs with a sign that said, "Take it." As Steven then realized one thing about this situation.
Aster wanted his house to get robbed.
Steven gulped as he knew Aster Phoenix. Not because he was a good duelist, which was one of the reasons why he knew him, but because of the whole fact that this man was known for beating the everlasting shit out of criminals for both A. Justice to be served and B. He was bored.
"Go ahead, take it." said Aster with so much ferocity, he felt like he was meeting with Batman. His eyes darkened as he had a sadistic grin on his face, "...take it."
"I - uh, uh…"
"What are you stuttering for? Come on, take it. I am not scary, I am a friendly fellow, so please, take this as a gift. Don't be shy at all," said Aster as Steven backed away, but it didn't help him out in the slightest, "Go ahead, take it."
Steven gulped as he then backed away, "Ac-actually, I think I will just leave and turn myself in. You know, for breaking and entering? So… yeah." Steven turned around as Aster said to him.
"Sure, buddy, but remember, come back here anytime~." said Aster in a cheery move.
"I won't." said Steven as he then ran straight towards a police station.
