A long time ago, in a town called Peach Creek, there lived three young boys who all shared the same name. They were Ed, Edd (or Double-D as everyone called him), and Eddy.

They spent their Summer days coming up with all sorts of zany schemes to get rich quickly. All sorts of scams and attractions to get the rest of the kids in their little cul-de-sac interested. Usually, their plans ended in failure but no matter what, they were living life to the fullest.

But sooner or later, everyone grows up eventually. You tend to miss those good times but you need to prepare yourself for the future. Growing up is hard, but such is life.


"Wake up, students. It's the dawn of a new day and you have things to do!"

Grumbling as he tossed and turned in his bed, the young man known as Eddy Skipper McGee slowly rose from his bed sheets and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Ugh...three whole years of living at this damn school..."

Getting up and seeing his clothes neatly laid out for him, Eddy got dressed, brushed his teeth, and combed his hair. He admired the goatee he had been growing lately and then winked at his reflection.

"But it's all gonna be worth it. Today is the big day!"

As Eddy stepped out of his room, he heard the sound of footsteps charging toward him and sighed as he held his hand out, blocking the large lovable oaf that was Edwin Horace Alba.

"Not in the mood, Lumpy."

"But Eddy, today is the day! We're finally graduating!"

"Honestly Eddy, did you sleep in again? Everyone else is already at the auditorium."

The one who spoke was Eddward Marion Burnwood, AKA Double-D due to the two 'D's in his name. Arguably, he was also the reason the Eds had been put in this whole academy to begin with. Blame the 'family business' for roping them all in.

"I'm a bit surprised. Aren't you happy that we can finally leave the academy and venture outside? You were always talking about it." Double-D pointed out.

"I'm glad we're leaving this dump behind, don't get me wrong," Eddy admitted. "But they still shouldn't have it so frickin' early."

"Hey, guys! Can we go to a pet shop and pet some chickens?" Ed excitedly asked. "My hands need feathering!"

"We'll have to see, Ed," Double-D assured. "Although the probability of finding a chicken in a pet shop would be sparse."

"Sheesh, are chickens all ya think about, Ed?" Eddy asked with a roll of his eyes.

The three soon found the rest of their friends already gathered together in a small auditorium. There was seemingly nobody there but a large television screen that showed a shadowy figure wearing a nice black and white suit with a black right glove and a white left glove. He wore crimson sunglasses and the rest of his face was obscured by the darkness.

"Students, it is from the bottom of my heart how much I am grateful that you have handled these last three years. I know the burdens that have been placed on you, but the ones who claim to be untouchable must realize they can, in fact, be touched. You have all been carefully selected due to your natural talents making you the best in the business and because your families are all very dear friends of mine."

Double-D nodded. "Indeed, sir. We knew what we were signing up for when we graduated high school."

"And for that, you have my deepest respect. You have all cultivated your innate skills for a special purpose. For you see...the ICA are not the only ones who can create assassins."

The Cul-De-Sac Kids all looked at each other. They had heard many stories of the International Contract Agency from their handler, who simply went by the name of "Knightmare". In fact, Double-D knew that his mother, Diana, was one of the handlers of that agency.

"Yeah, we know, you've told us the story of how you came from the ICA but decided to make your own branch because you didn't agree with some of their methods." Eddy nonchalantly said with his feet propped up on the chair in front of him...which belonged to Kevin Antonnuci.

"Be that as it may, I am still closely ingrained with the ICA and one or two of you have family, loved ones, who secretly work for them." Knightmare pointed out. "Now it is time for you to form a new dynasty of assassins, to bring down the corrupt and bring justice to those that the law has failed."

"It's ugly but...yeah, not like we have much choice." Nazz sighed.

"Due to this, none of you are connected to the ICA. You are, as they say, 'Freelancers'. You have more freedom to choose your own jobs, pick your targets, or simply kill time and enjoy the spoils of your kills. I trust that each and every one of you stays close, stays out of sight, and never be compromised."

"You got it, Big Man!" Lee Kanker said with a mock salute, her younger sisters Marie and May doing the same.

"Good. And one more thing...there is a special contact for you. A man who has more to teach than I have given you." Knightmare said as his screen changed to show a bald man in a black suit with a red tie and black gloves. On the back of his head was a barcode. "The only name he goes by is '47'. He will be the one guiding you from here on out. Be warned, he is still closely connected to the ICA, so keep your cards close to your chest around him."

A door opened, signaling the kids of Peach Creek to leave the auditorium. As they got up from their seats and made to leave, Knightmare had one final bout of wisdom to share.

"Remember this as you face the real world; The world is your weapon."


"Well, we're finally out," Eddy said as the Cul-De-Sac kids all boarded a plane that would bring them to a safe house that would become their base of operations going forward. "We better not fuck this up, guys."

It had been a strenuous three years for the Peach Creek Kids. While it was true that growing up you needed to leave a lot of your childhood behind, it was still hard, especially with the line of work that they had accepted.

The Eds had used their vast resourcefulness from all their scam-making days to make creative ways to get the job done. Eddy had learned how to handle black market deals as well as master every trick a gambler needed to win big. Double-D preferred to keep things clean and had also gotten talents in underground surgery. As for Ed, he was the heavy lifter as usual but didn't like resorting to any kind of killing technique unless absolutely necessary.

Kevin's marksmanship and tracking were unrivaled. No one could outdraw or outaim him, and it had resulted in several bullseyes. That was when Kevin decided a bullet was necessary but even in his mature age, he still had that bad temper and more often than not, resorted to brute force to solve his problems.

Nazz had used her beauty and agility to her advantage and had even studied various Japanese cultures and martial arts. She was also a skilled psychologist and had a talent for blending into whatever disguise she was given.

Rolf had taken to learning the dark arts, dressed as a dark shaman from stories of Voodoo, his arm tattooed and his clothing adorned with fur, feathers, and bones. His former skills as a butcher had been put to use, as he claimed he needed certain parts to grind for his concoctions.

Johnny's energy was channeled into creating explosives and honestly, how he even had eyebrows to grow back at this point was beyond anyone. Plank was kept strapped to his belt as he created a chaos of flames and shrapnel around him.

Jimmy and Sarah still stuck to each other like glue, the training they went through teaching them how to move quickly, to use their agility, their reliance on each other, how much weight was necessary to break a bone at what angle, and one pressure points pressed in a certain order could stop someone's heart.

Finally, the Kanker Sisters were jacks of all trades but their biggest talent was in making all kinds of poisons and toxins. May, often cited as the 'dumbest' of the sisters, proved to be a prodigy at biology and biochemistry, often being the brain behind all the new poisons that had been made. Marie was mostly the brawler of the sisters, liking to resolve her problems with her fists and whatever she could get her hands on. Finally, Lee was the one who handled the 'business' side of things, but that wasn't too say she couldn't get her hands bloody.

"You think we'll ever see Mr. Knightmare again, guys?" Ed asked his best friends.

"Honestly, I'm not sure. He gave us the freedom to choose what we do with what we have been given." Double-D said as he looked at his phone. "But I have a feeling that he'll always be there in our lives from now on."

The Cul-De-Sac Kids couldn't hate the mysterious man who had acted as their handler/supervisor for the past three years. His training was ruthless but he had a sense of compassion to him, always making sure that even when pushed to the limit, the kids would not break. He had been kind enough to let them stay in touch with their families and other friends while keeping their new occupation a secret...though Double-D had a feeling his mother already knew.

There was something else that bothered Double-D. Despite the shady nature of Knightmare, he seemed...tired. Like he had seen the very worst of humanity and barely climbed out of the hellscape with his mind intact. The smartest of the Eds could tell that Knightmare was a man who still saw beauty and goodness in the world...but was willing to make sure those that would taint that beauty and goodness died a slow, gruesome, agonizing death.

Be that as it may, this was their life now. They had chosen this path and they were sticking to it. The Cul-De-Sac Kids couldn't go back to those pleasant Summer days anymore and they'd always miss the good times they had...

Growing up was always hard, but such is life...


This is inspired by the Ed Edd n Eddy Assassin AU fanart. I take no credit for the idea, just this story.

And yes, the Peach Creek Kids will be meeting Agent 47 sooner rather than later. You'll see how it comes about in probably the next chapter.

I'll mostly be following the World of Assassination Trilogy due to all the creative kills you can pull off. In fact, each mission will depict the official way of how the Cul-De-Sac Kids plus 47 handle the targets, followed by how each of the kids handles the kill their way, sort of like alternate takes.

I hope you all look forward to the Peach Creek Kids as they take the role of bad guys taking down even worse guys. I assure you that you're in for a real treat!