A/N: Short drabble collection. Trying something a little different this time; instead of full-fledged fics or one-shots, I will be attempting something similar to those "theme" prompts, where you only write a couple sentences max per 'theme'.

As the title indicates, it'll revolve around the peculiarities of British-particularly English-behaviours and quirks. Full range of ratings, though the mature ones won't be particularly smutty. (Yes these are from the actual book, "Watching the English" by Kate Fox) Not very long because...I ran out of ideas.


Sex

"...You know, I'm starting to wonder where that stereotype of British people being prudes came from."

Those emeralds that were slowly about to close open with a start. "Huh?!"

She props up on one elbow. "Well, it's just when I first mentioned to some of my old classmates that I was marrying you, they kept giving me these strange, pitying looks and comments about how British people—especially from England—just don't...do sex?" Those short little brows furrow in confusion. "But that's definitely not true...I mean, we do it all the time and with—"

"All right, I think that's enough pillow talk for now. G'night love." And he turns over and resolutely makes like he's about to pass out so he doesn't have to engage in this incredibly awkward, embarrassing, subject.

Because English people just don't talk about sex. At all. Ever.


Flirting

Why does this have to be so difficult. You'd think simply making a declaration, a short utterance of "good job on the field today" would be cake compared to mowing down a dozen or more Objects, but instead it comes out as "you need t' watch your back; I'm not your nanny."

Which goes down about as well as you'd expect and now instead of a perhaps engaging in some light banter she stomps off in a huff (but not before shooting him a sharp glare and a muttered 'bastard') while he's drowning his sorrows (?) quite literally in the galley, glass in one hand and a half-empty bottle of gin in the other.

"For someone who claims to be sweet on her, you sure aren't very good at letting the poor girl know."

"Piss off Beckham, 'm not in the mood."

The other Brit chuckles and offers to pour him a glass, to which he accepts because his coordination is probably gone at this point. "Sure, whatever you say Adam. I'm surprised you didn't slosh yourself up first before attempting to, ah, flirt."

A pause.

"Actually, perhaps better that you didn't. I'm not sure if an insult is better or worse than a proposal to shag."

Banter


"Excuse me? Just who was the one who saved your sorry ass from getting skewered?"

"—Which wouldn't have happened if you'd just stuck to the plan like everyone else—"

"—Puh-lease, you're just mad 'cause you slipped up at the exact moment we needed it to count—"

"Oh, and suddenly you know what to do, Miss 'can't-even-get-to-the-site-fast-enough'?"

"You're a real jackass—"

"—cheeky bitch—"

The bickering continues all the way past the lockers, as the remaining two members of the Second Platoon trail behind.

"Ah, isn't young love sweet? Newton sighs wistfully while Gandhi sweatdrops.

"Even now, I still find you English to be...incomprehensible at times."

Male-Bonding (and girlwatching)


"Alright, that's definitely a 2-pinter. No, maybe 3?"

"Yer daft mate, 's gotta be at least 4...maybe even 5. Oy Adam, wha's yer take?"

His eyes swivel lazily to the buxom brunette, who's not-too-subtly making glances at their little group in the corner of the pub. "Why th' fuck yer askin' me for..."

"Ah c'mon mate, yur not married yet—gotta have a bit 'o fun 'afore 's all 'taboo' an' shite," the Scotsman takes another impressive swig while Gandhi claps him on the back. "'Sides, not many of those to th' pound, tha's fer sure...even if they're not real..."

"Ah, yeh...uh huh..." Against his better judgement (probably due to the alcohol) he takes another look over, though when his eyes settle on those enormous water balloons that look like they're about to burst out of that skin-tight dress, the only thing that comes to mind is how much better Sio's are.

Size isn't everything.


Weather

"Nice t' have some pleasant weather for a change."

"I'll say; all those grey clouds hovering around...as if the mood's not tense enough already."

"Though ye might wanna bring an umbrella, looks ta be rain clouds ahead later on..."

"Naturally Hunter, one can never be certain with skies like these..."

"Oy Newton, Hunter, how long're you two going t' keep jabbering?"

"Temper temper, Jack...it's a wonder you haven't scared off the poor girl by now."

The three finally troop out after what seemed to be an endless debate about whether or not to bring an umbrella—though, as Sio follows the trio out, she has to resist the urge to ask how one could possibly talk about the weather for so long.

Besides, to her the skies look pretty much the same as they did yesterday.

Grey.


Bridges

"Whooaa! No wonder the London Bridge is so popular...it's really impressive!" The girl leans over the railing just a tad too much for his taste, attempting to take photos. "Hey, do you think we can go up and see the view from those towers?"

"Well yes, it's open to the public during normal hours—oy squirt, please watch yourself—!" The girl gives a slight squeal as he pulls her back by the collar. "You're going to give me a heart attack..."

"Aww...sorry, I just wanted to get a good shot." Small hands give him a warm hug, which he returns. "But I'm never worried, 'cause I know you can always catch me if I ever really get into trouble," she smiles up at the man, and Adam feels his cheeks grow warm despite himself.

"W, Well, just because I can fly doesn't mean you should go around taking unnecessary risks," he chastises gently, before placing a light kiss on her forehead. "But of course, I'll always be here for you, figuratively and literally."

Sio giggles at his response, enjoying the warmth of his embrace. "Thanks...Adam." He responds with another kiss on her cheek, eliciting a squeak. "Mou, I thought British people frown upon PDA?"

"I'll make an exception," he responds dryly. "Besides, it's not like I care."

Their hands loops together as they continue walking along.

"Oh, and love? This is the Tower Bridge, by the way...London Bridge is the other one."