Chapter 2
Stella was in her office, finishing up paperwork. Her mind was on Carver and how he reacted to her stepping down as lieutenant and going to OFI. She never got to tell him her reason. He stormed out before she told anyone. She didn't understand why he was acting that way. She wanted to talk to him, but the active lieutenant that took her spot had truck running drills, and when they got done, they had two back-to-back calls.
"Lieutenant, how's it going?" Boden asked as he stepped into her office.
"It's going; it's almost done. Probably going to head out. I'm not sure what Herrmann is cooking, but the smell is making me sick."
Boden laughed. "Get used to that; it's part of being pregnant."
"Lucky me," she said sarcastically.
"What's up with Carver? Why did he storm out like that?"
Stella shrugged. "I honestly don't know, Chief; I've been sitting here thinking about it too."
Boden nodded, saying, "So nothing happened that would cause him to act like that?"
"Not that I'm aware of." She tells Boden, even though she does have an idea, it can't be what happened; they already talked about that, and everything was fine between them, at least she thought it was. Now she's not too sure; now she wonders if he was lying to her.
Boden looks at her for a second. "It just doesn't seem like him. Maybe his mood today has something to do with the black eye he has."
"I agree, Chief. I'm going to have a conversation with him once he's back from his call." Stella tells him, avoiding the black-eye comment. She knows exactly how he got the black eye. But Boden doesn't need to know that.
"Good, we need to get to the bottom of this; we can't have firefighters acting like that; it was very unprofessional. If he has some personal stuff going on, he needs to keep it in check when he's on shift.
"Yes, chief, I know I will handle it, I promise."
Boden walks to the doorway and turns around. "Let me know if we need to write him up; it's your decision, "he tells her, then walks away. Leaving her to rethink the situation with Carver.
Severide was in his office, going over old reports with Cruz. "Hey, do you know why Carver stormed out during the briefing?"
"I don't have a clue, boss. It was a little overly dramatic."
"That's what I thought."
"Maybe it has something to do with the black eye he got," Crus said, as he laughed.
"What black eye?" Kelly questioned.
Cruz was surprised, "You didn't see it," Kelly shakes his head. "Someone gave him a good one; his eye is all messed up."
Kelly thought for a moment, "Wonder what happened?"
"I don't know, Mouch said, that Carver gets into fights a lot; I guess something happened at the other bar he hangs out at. I asked, and he said, Let's just say mistakes were made."
Kelly arched his eyebrow. "Wonder what he meant by that?" Cruz shrugged. "I didn't pay attention to Carver; come to think of it, he's the only one who didn't welcome me back this morning."
"Really, I always thought he was a little strange," Cruz said with a shrug. "Stella doesn't know; why he stormed out?"
"She said she doesn't, but I kind of get the feeling she's keeping something from me." he paused, "Was everything on truck good while I was gone? Did Stella have any issues with her men?"
Cruz thought for a moment. "Not that I'm aware of; she didn't say anything to me about them. She helped me out a lot and was my biggest supporter while you were gone. Other than telling me how much she missed you, that's it."
Kelly smiled "Something just seems off about the situation." He told him as he tapped his pen against the desk. "This is going to sound crazy, and I never told Stella about it."
" What?"
"Right before the whole academy thing came up, Carver said something to me that's been in the back of my mind, kind of bothering me. Especially since I was gone for so long."
Cruz raised his eyebrow. " What was?"
"He asked how long I've been a squad lieutenant and how long Stella has been here at 51. I told him, and he kind of nodded, then said, You're a lucky guy, Lieutenant Severide. I didn't reply; I just looked at him."
"Hmm, well, you are a lucky man; Stella's a great catch."
"Believe me, I know how lucky I am," he tells him, as he smiles thinking of his wife. "There are days when I wake up and I pinch myself because I can't believe she's mine."
Cruz smiled and said, "I feel you on that. So, why has that been bothering you?"
Kelly stood up. He looked out the door, making sure Stella wasn't coming. "Remember a few years ago, when Stella's friend from high school came to visit?"
"Oh, yeah, that Tyler guy."
"Yeah, see, what Carver said to me was exactly what Tyler said to me." Cruz looked confused. "He said you're one lucky dude; he was referring to Stella being my girlfriend at the time."
"Okay, again, I agree, you are a lucky dude," Cruz said, clearly not understanding what Kelly was getting at.
"It's the way he said it, man; it's like I got a strange vibe from him. And then, when I saw him and Stella interact, I knew my vibe was right."
"Right, about what?"
"He was in love with Stella; I told her that, but that only backfired on me. She didn't see what I saw till later on. To Stella, he was just a close friend, nothing more. But to Tyler, it was something more."
Cruz nods. "Wait, do you think Carver is in love with Stella?"
Kelly shrugged, "I don't know, I see the signs, and him getting upset and storming out today only makes me think I was right."
" Wow!"
"I know nothing happened because Stella would never do anything like that; she loves me and only has eyes for me. I trust her completely and him not too much."
Cruz thought for a moment. "You know you could be right." Kelly gave him a look. "Gallo told Violet, and Violet told Brett, and Brett told me."
"What told you what?" Kelly asked; he usually doesn't get involved in firehouse gossip, but he wants information on Carver.
"When Carver first got here, he asked Gallo how long you and Stella had been together. Gallo told him awhile and asked why; Carver said he was just wondering. Gallo felt there was something more to his asking."
Kelly nods. "That is odd; why would he ask that?" Kelly questioned.
Stella was getting ready to leave since her headache was getting worse. She wanted to go see Kelly, but squad was on a call.
"Lieutenant Kidd, Chief, said you're looking for me."
Stella looked up to see Carver in her doorway. "I was; come on in."
He walked in and looked down at the floor. "Sorry, lieutenant, about my actions earlier. Won't happen again."
Stella nods. "What causes that reaction is what I'm curious about." Carver kept looking at the floor, not saying a word. "Carver, talk to me. What is going on?"
"I apologized, Lieutenant Kidd. I'm not sure what else you want me to say."
"I want you to say why you stormed out like that. Help me understand."
" Just think it's crazy that you are stepping down because your husband is making you. But that's my opinion."
Stella arched her eyebrow. "What are you talking about? My husband is not making me do anything; he is not the reason I'm stepping down. And if you didn't storm out this morning, you
"Sure, okay, if you say so," Carver said, cutting her off.
Stella was getting pissed. "Look, I don't know what you think; you think you know. But whatever it is, you're wrong."
"You told him what happened between us, and he gave you an ultimatum. He wants you to stay away from me, which I understand. I apologized for the night at Molly's and what happened last shift, and for storming out of the meeting this morning. "
"First off, Kelly would never give me an ultimatum. And no, I haven't told him what you did; lastly, nothing happened between us."
"You haven't," Carver said in a surprised tone.
"No, I haven't, but I am telling him. He just got home, and we've been too busy celebrating. But I will be telling him soon. I don't keep secrets from him."
Carver shook his head. "I think it's best not to tell him, since it didn't mean anything, and I apologized both times."
"It doesn't matter what you think; I love and respect him too much not to be honest with him. I tell him everything."
"Fine, don't say I didn't warn you. Men don't react well to stuff like this. He might forgive the first time, but the second time is a no deal breaker."
"Well, you don't know my husband."
Carver nods. She's got a point. "Well, for your sake, I hope you're right," he smiled. then walked away.
Stella bit her lip as she watched him walk away. Kelly is going to be upset; she knows that much, but he's going to understand it wasn't a big deal. She hopes.
After letting Chief know she had a conversation with Carver and that he apologized, Stella decided to go home; her head was killing her and the smell of whatever Herrmann cooked was making her nauseous. She just wanted to lay in bed for a few hours.
As she walked out the door, she smiled, seeing Kelly sitting in his chair at the squad table; he was reading something, so he didn't see her.
"I missed seeing you in that chair." She tells him as she gets closer.
He looks up at her and smiles. "I missed you; I feel like I haven't seen you all day," he tells her as he pulls her onto his lap.
"I'm just trying to make sure everything is in order for the active lieutenant while I'm out." She tells him as her hand strokes the back of his neck. "You know this sucks."
" What?"
"I spent the last eight weeks in this firehouse missing you, and now you're back and...
"And I have to spend the next few months here without you." He finishes her sentence. "Yeah, it's going to suck, but it's worth it to keep you and our baby safe," he tells her as he places his hand on her tummy.
She rested her head against his forehead. "I'm so happy you're back," she whispered.
"Me too, babe." He caresses her cheek before kissing her softly.
"How was your first call back?" She asked him after the kiss ended.
"It was okay, nothing big, no dangerous call as I hoped."
"Good. "I don't like it when you have dangerous calls."
"The feeling is mutual, babe."
"Do you think Cruz or Capp can drop you off at home in the morning?" she asked, as she ran her fingers around his jawline.
He gives her a confused look. " Why?"
"My head is killing me, and whatever that smell is inside the firehouse, it's making me sick." So, I'm going to go home.
He kisses her forehead, then her temple. "My keys are in my office."
"I got them already." She tells him as she takes them out of her pocket.
"Come on, I'll walk you to the car." He tells her, and she slowly stands up. He noticed how pale she looked. "Do you need me to take you home?"
"No, babe, I can drive."
He wraps his arms around her waist as they get to his car. "Be careful," he tells her, kissing her forehead again.
"I will, I promise."
He leans down and kisses her gently. "Text me and let me know you made it home safe."
She wraps her arms around his waist and hugs him tight. "I will." He returns the hug by hugging her even tighter. She pulls back. And he kisses her head again. He opens the car door for her. He leans down, pulls her shirt up just a tad, and kisses her stomach.
She smiles as she hears him whisper "I love you" to their baby. He looks at her. "And I love you." Give her another kiss.
"I love you." She tells him. "Please be careful," she says, cupping his face. "When you're on a call dealing with a life-and-death situation, remember before you do something crazy, you're thinking for three now."
He smiles, "I will, I promise," he whispered before kissing her forehead. "I'll see you in the morning." He stood there on the sidewalk and watched her drive away.
Mouch had searched the whole firehouse looking for Carver; he found him sitting in the locker room.
"Carver, what the hell was that this morning?"
Carver looked at him. "What are you talking about?"
"Don't play with me," Mouch warned him. "Your little storm out before Kidd told us her news."
Carver rolled his eyes and said, "It was nothing."
Mouch looked around to make sure no one was there. "Bullshit, it was something, but you better knock it down to nothing fast."
Carver stood up. "You have no idea what you're talking about."
"I was at Molly's that night; I saw what you did; I'm the one that took your drunk ass home." Carver's eyes widened; he clearly didn't remember that part. "Don't you dare try to come between them? I won't let you. I know how you got the black eye too."
"I'm not coming between them; it was a mistake. A mistake that I admit to making both times. And I've apologized over and over to her."
"Damn right, it was a mistake, and an apology doesn't mean a damn thing if you're not actually sorry for what you did," Mouch tells him. "She's pregnant; she doesn't need drama. Don't mess with my lieutenant," he warns him.
Carver was surprised. "Pregnant?"
"Yeah, if you weren't such a jackass this morning and actually stuck around, you would have heard the announcement."
Carver just stood there, not sure what to say.
"You need to pull yourself together or request a transfer as soon as possible," Mouch tells him, but Carver just looks at him. "It looks like you've got a decision to make; make a wise one."
"That kid just hit the lottery," Carver said, causing Mouch to look at him confusedly. Not understanding what that meant. "I'm just saying he or she's one lucky kid."
Kelly walked into the loft and threw his bag down. And went straight to the bedroom. He knew Stella had had a rough night and wanted to check on her. "Stella!" he yelled when he noticed the bed was empty. "Babe," he said, as he walked towards the bathroom.
"I was taking a shower." She tells him as she opens the bathroom door.
"I was worried." He said as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She rolls her eyes. "How are you feeling?"
"I thought morning sickness was just for mornings, but apparently I'm wrong. I was sick all night." She tells him as she lays her head on his chest.
"I'm sorry, babe," he tells her as he kisses the top of her head. "Do you need some crackers or something?"
She pulled back, glaring at him. "No food; I don't even want to smell, look at, or talk about food."
"Okay, but you have to eat for the baby's sake."
" I know later. "I just want coffee."
Kelly arched his eyebrow. "No coffee."
"Excuse me?" she asked as she pulled away from him.
"Coffee is not good for pregnant women."
"Who are you, the coffee police?"
"No, I read that caffeine isn't good for pregnant women."
Stella sighed dramatically. ''Kelly, one cup of coffee is not going to hurt me or the baby."
"If it's decaffeinated, then yes, you can have it."
"Baby, I'm not drinking decaffeinated coffee; I need caffeine to keep me awake and energized."
Kelly shakes his head. "It won't hurt you to try it."
"Kelly decaf only helps when you throw it at people." Kelly laughs at her. She walks away from him. "I'm giving up alcohol and coffee." She pouted. "I thought you loved me," she said, as she gave him a puppy dog pout.
Kelly shakes his head as he walks over toward her. "I do; I love you very much, and I love our baby. I'm just looking out for you and the baby. " He wraps her in his arms. " Donna gave me some herbal tea. She said the lemon balm and peppermint teas have been known to lessen morning sickness symptoms."
" Really?"
"That's what she said. How about I make a deal with you? I'll give up alcohol and coffee too."
Stella's eyes widened in surprise. "You would do that for me?"
"Yes, I would do anything for you and our baby."
"You are too good to me." She said as she kissed him. "But you don't have to do that; I will give the herbal tea a try, just for you."
He smiled and said, "Thank you; I mean it, Stella. I want to help you in any way I can to make this pregnancy easier for you. Whatever you need or want, just let me know."
She kissed his forehead and hugged him tightly. "I'm so lucky to be having a baby with you."
"I'm the lucky one here, babe," he tells her as he tightens his grip on her.
"So can you do me a favor?"
"Anything beautiful."
She pulls back. "Can you go take a shower? You smell like whatever Herrmann was cooking yesterday. And I'm getting nauseous again."
He kissed her a few more times. "Whatever you want, babe," he tells her before walking away.
Stella made some of the herbal tea and realized it wasn't as bad as she thought. She took a throw pillow from the couch. And folded it, putting it under her robe. It was at that moment that Kelly entered the room. "Damn, that was fast; I was in the shower for like ten minutes," he jokes, looking at her stomach.
She rolls her eyes and says, "I was just curious about what I would look like when I'm as big as a house."
"You're still hot to me," he tells her as he opens the fridge.
" Really? "You're going to be happy when I'm as big as a whale."
"More to love, babe." He said this, giving her a wink.
"Whatever," she tells him as she throws the pillow back on the couch. Her phone buzzes.
Kelly looks over at her. "Who's that?"
"Just Brett asking how I'm feeling today." She tells him as she texts Brett back.
Kelly bit his lip, and now just seems like the right time. He couldn't put it off anymore. The Carver thing was driving him crazy his whole shift. "Do you know how Carver got that black eye?" he asked, watching as her smile faded, her eyes closed, and her head dropped. At that moment, he knew he was right; she was keeping something from him.
"I do," she whispered. She didn't look at him; she was trying to gather in her head what to say. "I got something to tell you, and you're not going to like it, but I promised you that I would always be honest with you, and I hate keeping things from you."
The joyful atmosphere that was just in circulation a few minutes ago suddenly took a dramatic change.
He felt his heart literally break; his feeling was right. Something happened with Carver.
She continues to stand there, not moving. She takes a deep breath; she did nothing wrong; he won't be upset with her; he might want to hurt Carver, but she can keep him calm. "We need to talk, but I need you to promise me you won't get upset and you will stay calm."
"No, I'm not promising anything." He tells her as he crosses his arms over his chest.
"Kelly, please"
"No, what happened?"
She walks over to him and reaches for his arm. "Come sit down."
He pulls away from her: "No, I'm not sitting; I'm not staying calm; I'm not promising anything. Just tell me what happened." His voice is unsettling.
The way he is acting has her worried that Carver was right yesterday; he's not going to understand; he's going to blame her, and she didn't do anything wrong. A few tear drops fell, and damn hormones got her crying.
He watches as she wipes a tear away. She's crying; this can't be good. Before he can even comprehend the words to say anything to her. Words he will soon regret flew out of his mouth, "Did you sleep with him?"
Stella lifted her head rapidly. Their eyes connected. "Are you kidding me?" she questioned, not believing what she just heard. "You didn't just ask me that?"
His mouth dropped; he too wasn't prepared for those words to come out of his mouth. "I'm sorry," he said. As he looks at her, her eyes are wide, the look of shock and hurt echoing on her face.
"I didn't mean it." He tells her he is now mentally kicking himself. He just told Cruz yesterday that he trusted her completely, and now he has her believing he doesn't trust her.
She looks at him in disbelief. "I would never cheat on you," she cries. "I would never purposely hurt you or destroy what we have built together, Kelly; I can't believe you..." she trails off, her mind not properly processing what he said.
He walks to her. "Stella, I am so sorry; I didn't mean it. I swear." He tells her as he takes both her hands into his. "I was acting impulsively without considering the potential damage of my words. I swear, my tongue produces words faster than my brain can approve them."
She looks away from him as her tears continue to fall. "That hurt," she whispered.
He pulls her into a hug and says, "Stella, I'm sorry. I can't even explain why I said it; I saw your face when I asked about Carver, then you said we needed to talk and asked me not to get upset...
"And you just assumed I cheated on you." She said as she looked up at him.
"It just came out; I wish I could take the words back. I know you would never cheat on me."
"Do you? Cause it doesn't seem like it to me."
"Stella, I have never questioned your loyalty to me the whole time we've been together." He tells her honestly, "Even in a conversation with Cruz yesterday, I told him I trust you completely."
She looks at him confusedly and pulls away. "What brought that conversation up?" she asked curiously.
He sighed, "We were talking about Carver and how he stormed out yesterday and his black eye. I was just curious to know what was going on with him. It might not have bothered you the way he acted yesterday, but it got under my skin. I just felt like I was missing something; I don't trust the guys around you. He gave me some bad vibes before I left. I never once actually thought you guys slept together."
Stella bit her lip as she looked at him. "Sit down, Kelly, I have to tell you something."
He swallowed hard. As he watched her, he knew whatever she was going to say, he wasn't going to like it. But he doesn't protest this time. He walked over and sat on the couch; she surprised him by straddling his lap. He immediately wraps his arms around her waist. "I love you; you know that. I have never loved anyone or anything the way I love you," she tells him, as she caresses his face. "I didn't sleep with Carver...
"Stella... " He started, but she covered his mouth with her hand. "Let me talk," she tells him. He nods, and she moves her hand. "I didn't sleep with Carver; that thought has never entered and will never enter my mind. I might feel bad for what he's been through in life, and he's not as bad as I originally thought he was; he seemed like a pretty decent guy who's been dealt a bad hand in life," she paused. "He was going through some stuff, especially with his brother showing up, and I just wanted to be there for him; it's who I am. I tend to over care."
"I know; it's one of the million things I love about you."
She gave him a half-smile. "He and Seager have started hanging out, and I actually thought she could be good for him."
Kelly smirks at her. "Seager, really?"
"Yes, really. I figured if she had her eyes set on Carver, she wouldn't be batting her eyes at my man anymore. So, it was a win for me."
Kelly laughed, "Well good for them finding each other."
"Yeah, that's what I thought, but unfortunately, I guess it wasn't more than a casual hookup or two. I don't know, and honestly, it's not my business." She tells him as her eyes drop to his chest. She knows she has to get to the real reason they are having this conversation. "The reason I asked you to promise me that you wouldn't get upset was because I know you, and you're going to want to say or do something to Carver."
"What did he do?" He asked; his temperature was rising now.
She took a deep breath. "A few nights ago, at Molly's, Mouch and I were closing down; he was wiping down the bar, and I was wiping down the tables. Carver was there, drunk off his ass, and Mouch took his keys so he wouldn't drive. Mouch was going to take him home once we were done. "
Kelly watched her face as she talked, trying to piece together what happened.
"When I turned around, Carver was in my personal space, a little too close for me. Before I could question him. He surprised the hell out of me and kissed me. "
Kelly shook his head but didn't say anything.
"It was like a second; hell, less than a second. I pushed him away so fast that he hit a few barstools and the bar. Mouch went over to him and picked him up off the floor. said some choice words to him and took him out of the bar. "
She bites her lip as she waits for his response.
He definitely doesn't like that Carver kissed her, especially knowing she's a married woman.
"The next day on shift, he came to my office and apologized repeatedly for his actions, saying he didn't know why he did it; he had a little too much to drink, and a lot was going on, and he didn't mean it."
"What did you say to him?"
" I told him it was fine and not to worry about it. He was drunk; hell, we've all done things when we're drunk that we've regretted the next morning. At least I have."
" Me too," he tells her as he runs his thumb over her lips. Yes, it bothers him that another man touched her lips, but deep down he knows he can't be mad at her because she pushed him away and didn't kiss back, and if he were honest with himself, he too was in the same boat a few years ago when Renee kissed him; he just never told her about that. "Do you believe him? Do you think it was just because he was drunk? Is that how he got the black eye from hitting the bar or something else? Or did Mouch punch him, because if so, I owe Mouch a beer," he laughs.
She looks up at the ceiling, taking a deep breath. "No, Mouch didn't punch him."
"Damn," he teased.
"He got the black eye because I punched him." She said, looking at him.
Kelly smiled brightly. "That's my girl," he tells her as he leans in and kisses her. "I'm so proud of you."
She wants to stop talking about it and just enjoy him not being upset, but she knows there's more to tell him.
"When did you punch him?" he asked, because she told him she pushed him away, then said he apologized the next day.
"Right after the second time he kissed me, this time he was a little too aggressive."
She watched as his smile faded; she felt him tense under her. His eyes darken, and his jaw clenches. He lifts her off of him carefully. And stands up. " Kelly..". He didn't say a word as he put his shirt on and grabbed his shoes. Stella realized he was going to go find Carver. She ran over and blocked him from going out the door. "Kelly, don't do this," she begged.
"Move," he tells her; his tone is unrecognizable to her. His blue eyes were terribly cold and hard.
No"
"Stella, move now." He demands as he clenches his fist tightly.
She's never seen him this mad. In all the time she's known him, she tells him, "If you want me to move, you're going to have to physically move me."
