10. TIRED

It was a hot night. Literally. When I woke up, I realized my arms and legs were tangled around Edythe's cool body, like she was my very own personal air conditioner. She was holding me, stroking my bruised arms and I swear every touch made me feel better by the second, like she was healing me up slowly with her magic. Only, she wouldn't believe that even if I said it. And she wasn't going to touch me the way I really wanted her to, so there goes the honeymoon phase of my actual honeymoon – you know, the whole "consummation" thing, at least. I stirred a little.

"You're up." she began, running her fingers through my hair and straightening out my bedhead with her gentle touches. I really liked when she did this, but of course I was too embarrassed to actually tell her how it made me feel.

"Morning." I kissed her forehead. "So, what are we gonna do today?"

"I was hoping we could take a trip up to the mainland again, maybe look at one of those national parks." She smiled, pulling some clothes out from the closet.

"I like it." I nodded my approval. "And what about tonight...?" I added hopefully, leaning forward. She swiveled round to look at me again.

"Dinner and then bedtime. You know, sleep. At least for you." she answered matter-of-factly, putting one hand on her hip and leaning up against the frame of the closet door. Of course, with a few other things running through my mind which I'd rather do instead, just sleeping had as much appeal to me as taking a freezing-cold shower after being out in the pouring rain for several hours.

"Right." I bounced a finger in her direction, pulling my own lips up into a tight, disappointed smile. I knew it was a lost cause.

"Oh, come on, don't be like that." She waved me off. "Just think of it as the strengthening of our soul connection." She gave me this sort-of smile that made it look like she was making fun of me. Oh wait, that's right - she was.

"I think our soul connection is totally fine. It's pretty amazing, actually." I said very seriously. "But it was that physical connection thing I was really hoping to work at in this trip..." I came up behind her, pressing my lips to her neck and running my hands down either side of her beautiful body.

She wasn't taking it.

She took my hands from around her waist and turned to face me, touching my chest with both her own hands. "I'm sorry Beau, but it's still going to be a no. That's final." And it really did sound like she felt bad about it.

"Okay, okay. You win." Judging by the look she gave me though, it didn't seem like she thought she was winning, either. And then I was mad at myself for making her feel bad. Knowing she was probably looking forward to the trip for my sake out of guilt - to distract me; to keep me entertained - I hurried to the closet, shimmying into a clean pair of khaki shorts and a light blue poplin shirt I pulled out. I still wasn't used to the way I looked in these things; like I was some total prep king – I insisted on bringing my old t-shirts and jeans with me on the honeymoon, but Archie wouldn't hear it. "Only the best for his sister", you know. Eyeing the hamper of dirty clothes, I was instantly reminded that I needed to get started on doing the laundry soon - it was Sunday after all - but filed the thought away for later. Who wants to think of laundry at a time like this anyways? I finished buttoning up my shirt and turned to my wife. She was already... well, ready. And of course, she looked like a model for some designer brand's Summer Collection in this cute little yellow sundress that had these cutout things in the back. The hem of the skirt went a little above her knees so most of her legs - those beautiful, perfect legs of hers - were exposed. I looked away, hiding my blushing face. She came up to my side, a small white floral umbrella in one hand.

"It's going to rain." she answered, seeing me eye her accessory. I chuckled. "I guess that's pretty perfect, then. For you, at least. But it's your fault if I slip in the mud and bang up my face on a nearby rock." I said only half-jokingly. There was so much potential for bodily harm - not to mention total humiliation - in wet weather as I had come to know living in Forks. Especially for me. No, wait. Pretty sure it's only for me. Danger seems to think he and I have a good relationship going on, or something. We don't. Trust me.

"You know I wouldn't let that happen to you." she assured with total confidence and pulled my arm through hers.

"Hmm…yeah, I guess you're right." I shrugged, smiling.

"I usually am."

"Can't argue with that."

"Very good answer." She applauded with a laugh, tossing her dimples at me as a reward. My heart did its weird double-thump thing again and I coughed trying to cover myself.

"Ready?" Her musical voice fluttered in my ear.

Ready." I answered her in kind and we walked out the door together.

…

Edythe took us to this place called Tijuca National Park. It was freaking gorgeous here. Just as she said, it was raining, which gave her an excuse to use her umbrella so you couldn't see her diamond skin shining in the still-bright weather. We were with this little tour group and everyone had their cameras out and ready, their eyes growing larger whenever they heard the far cry of a toucan from the trees, maybe a neon-colored tanager here or a hyacinth macaw there. We went up this forest pathway which wound around a giant mountain and led straight to the lookout point at the top of a waterfall. The tour guide went at a slow enough pace for even myself, the athletically-challenged pale skinny kid, to keep up without losing my breath. But I guess the same couldn't be said for everyone else. There was a pregnant lady a few feet from where we stood who perched herself on a rock, using a map folded accordion-style as a fan while her husband, holding an umbrella over her, gave her some ice water to drink. This tiny kid scrambled into her lap - what was left of it, at least - and she started fanning the both of them. Distracted, I realized then that I'd lost track of my own wife and was frantic for a second, only to see her leaning up against another boulder a few feet away from the pregnant lady and her family. Immediately, she started conversing with her in perfect Spanish – not Portuguese like I'd expected with us being here in Rio – and I moved closer to but not directly up to them, afraid of ruining their conversation with my highly-contagious social ineptitude and so, like some creepy stalker, I eavesdropped in on them from here. Here's what I pieced together – the woman and her family were visiting from Argentina. The little kid - their son - whom Edythe subsequently tickled was two, and she and her husband were celebrating their seventh wedding anniversary with this trip. That's when Edythe's face lit up and she started telling the woman all about how me and her were on our honeymoon - how thrilled she sounded, and happy. I felt that same sort of wonder I did when she so eagerly told Charlie we were getting married last month and couldn't help but smile. At that moment, Edythe looked to where I was standing and motioned for me to come over. She introduced me to the lady with "Este es mi marido" and said my name so proudly it made my face turn red. "Hola." I said in my very best Spanish and shook the lady's hand. And then the rest of the tour group started moving again, which by the way I was totally okay with. You see, I wasn't too bad at Spanish – only thing is, while I could read and understand it pretty well, speaking it for me was a totally different ballgame. My conversational English skills were already this poor, imagine how I'd sound trying to converse in Spanish. Yeesh. I know it's a little unfair but just for that, I was sort of relieved in a way to see them go and we waved them off.

Edythe still didn't get up.

"We better hurry if we don't want to get left behind." I said, jerking my thumb in the direction of the fading group.

"Oh yes, of course." she said very quietly, sort of distracted. She got to her feet in two slow movements and weirdly, she almost seemed... tired. Maybe she just didn't have enough to eat.

"You okay?" I asked, giving her a hand.

"Yeah. Just trying to fit in better with the humans." She motioned to where the pregnant woman and her family lingered in the back of the group.

"I see. You really liked them, huh?"

She smiled sadly at that. "I was just going through their thoughts. The husband and wife, they're still so in love with each other it's crazy. And that little boy – his name is Marco. He's been practicing how to spell it, you know, and he's only two. I saw it going round and round in his head." She chuckled. "And they're expecting a baby girl in just a few months. I mean, how happy can they be? Everything about them – their faces, their memories, their thoughts – were so beautiful. I couldn't help it." Her golden eyes shone in the breaking light of the sun dotting through the wet trees. It almost felt like I could see all those things, too. She sighed a sigh filled with this sad sort of yearning, and I could understand it better now seeing that look in her eyes; thinking of that family's happiness. What Edythe knew she would miss out on because of what she is. It would have broken my heart, she'd said earlier, and her perspective became so much clearer to me now long after she'd spoken the words. For the first time, in that moment, I wanted us to have what they had too; wished we had that kind of potential. But I also knew that in life, just wishing for things to be was wholly different from making something happen, because Edythe and I absolutely, positively, could not make that happen, and Edythe will always, always be the only one I'd ever want it to happen with. And so, I put that impossible dream away.

"Let's stay together, please." Our tour guide, Alonso, poked his head out from behind a low-hanging tree up ahead, the sound of his voice scattering my thoughts.

"Sorry! We'll be right over." I called back and he continued on. I turned to my wife. "We better hurry." I chuckled and quickened my pace just a little bit. Big mistake.

My foot got caught in a slot of wet, sticky mud and the floor went out from under me.

I was falling backwards. "Beau!" Edythe cried out, grabbing my arm. The blur of gray rock and the whiteness of Edythe's porcelain calf filled my vision. I felt the whoosh of a boulder just barely whizzing by the split ends of the hairs on my head and watched it sail straight over the edge of a cliff I suddenly realized we were standing very dangerously near to, flying into the forest below. A shoot of pain gathered in the middle of my arm and I realized that although Edythe was holding me up with one hand so my head was hanging off the ground, I scraped up my other elbow pretty bad on another rock embedded in the moss on the dirt path and I shuddered when I saw the red of my own blood smeared on it. My stomach lurched and I couldn't bring myself to look at the blood just spurting from my wound. I thought I could smell it; that horrible iron-and-salted rust scent and my knees went weak, my stomach tying itself into queasy knots - I thought I'd pass out. Edythe, on the other hand? Well, it seemed punting that giant boulder off the cliff made the fatigue I saw on her face earlier all but disappear.

"Are you alright, Beau?" She looked back at me with bright, pulsing eyes.

"I'm fine thanks to you." was all I could say. She steadied me, holding my shoulders.

"You don't need to thank me for saving you. I do that for entirely selfish reasons, you know. But I'm just sorry you still got hurt." She touched the red of my skinned elbow and I had to look away. I knew she couldn't look long at it, either.

"It's just a scratch. I would have had much worse if I split my skull open on that giant rock you sent clear into the jungle." I chuckled to ease her, covering up the scrape with my fingers. Edythe rummaged through her purse and took out a roll of gauze. "I did have a feeling you might be needing this." She handed me the roll but still tried averting her eyes – or her nose, more like – and poured some water and then some hand sanitizer on the scrape as we dressed the wound together. I guess it didn't look too bad once all the red was gone and after the whole "almost dying" fiasco was over, we somehow managed to catch up with the rest of our group without necessitating a visit to the emergency room. Alonso the tour guide gawked at us as I huffed along and the color – what little I had left of it, at least – still had yet to return to my cheeks and he made a face which seemed to ask without the words what the hell was wrong with me.

"I have a weak vasovagal system. It's just a neurally mediated syncope." I explained, having memorized the description of my condition my whole life in case I ever looked like I was totally dying in public but really wasn't. I mean, I was dying a little on the inside, but I don't think that counts. Narrowing his eyes, Alonso did a once-over of me, realized I wasn't gonna die on his watch today and turned away, pretending I didn't say anything at all. I sighed. Edythe smacked my chest twice pretty hard and hid her face in my shoulder so I could feel the vibration of her muffled laughter echo right through me. Hysterical.

In about another half hour or so, we finally made it to the top of the waterfall, but it felt more like the top of the world. The crystal blue water shimmered in rainbow hues, the roar of the cascading stream filling our ears as it weaved itself masterfully down the side of a cliff. Edythe put her umbrella away, seeing how everyone in our group was much more concerned about getting the best shot of the crystal blue spray than looking at her – impossible for me as it was to believe – and we pulled each other in by the waist, looking out over the edge where you could see the whole world in high definition.

"Looks like we made it." She laughed.

"Yeah." I agreed, and we kissed on it.

…

It was almost sundown by the time we hiked down the trail again. The bus we took to get here drove us back to town and Edythe helped me down the tall steps so we wouldn't have another near-death situation on our hands again. We made our way back to our boat parked on the far side of that stretch of beach and Edythe helped me into the passenger seat, claiming the driver's seat for herself right after. The second we got out onto the water, she floored it without warning and became a freaking speed demon. It was the fastest she'd ever gone on this trip and I spent the entire ride trying not to get thrown overboard while Edythe's eyes grew bright and shiny with untapped enthusiasm as she navigated the wheel with one hand because apparently my wife was totally nuts. I couldn't even stand by the time we docked on shore and, waving away her hand and vehemently refusing her aid, I crawled out of the boat, dragging my body on the sand and flopping over onto my back to catch my breath while my wife threw her head back and howled with laughter above me, not even bothering trying to hide it.

"You're ridiculous." She threw me over her shoulder, laughing all the way as she sprinted into the house and put me down on our bed. "Just lie down for a few minutes, you big baby. I'll help you with the bandages later." She loped to the door and looked back at me with a big smile on her face. "I'll go start on some dinner for you."

"Hey, it's alright, I'm perfectly capable-" I began but by then she was already gone. Sighing, I rested the back of my hand on my forehead and closed my eyes.