20. I HAVE QUESTIONS.

"What do you mean 'they're coming for us', Arch?" asked Edythe, eyes wide. "We haven't done anything wrong, and we're not going to anytime soon."

Archie shook his head. "The choice hasn't been made yet, Edy. I don't even know if they know yet. All I know is that it's for something…" he squeezed his eyes shut, holding his own quivering fingers out like he was touching at an invisible crystal ball, "…for something that's already been done. But I just don't know exactly what that something is." He turned to look at Beau and Edythe, who were sitting together on the couch now. "Did anything - exposing - happen on the honeymoon? Were you careful around the humans, Edy?"

"I looked out the window in the airplane, but that was just once for two minutes and nobody saw. Beau was blocking their view. We also went with this small tourist group up to the top of a waterfall, but I had an umbrella with me most of the time because it was raining. We were very careful; nobody would've seen anything. That's all I could think of at the top of my head." Edythe explained.

Beau took a breath. His jaw opened and closed, and he started messing with his fingers. I knew what that meant – he was definitely wanting to say something. I thought about what my mom said and about what Beau looked up on the computer because of it, yielding myself to the unpleasant memory and the images which it conjured up in my mind. I wrapped my arms tight around myself, like I was feeling a draft - a very unpleasant, very unwelcome draft - that left me cold. If what I was unfortunately suspecting was true, then obviously they weren't careful enough in one department, at least. It still hurt to think about in general.

"Is that even possible?" Edythe looked straight at Beau now, her voice coming out a near-silent sound.

"What is?" Beau started, alarmed. Edythe sighed, her gaze flicking back to me.

"Seriously, what the hell? Could you just stop doing that?" I scoffed, narrowing my eyes at her.

"Your thoughts are very loud, Julie." She crossed her arms over her chest, mimicking me.

"Just ask your husband about it like a normal person, then." Yeah, as normal as a person who almost murdered the so-called love of her life can be. She flinched when I said that – or, rather, thought it. I sniffed. It was intentional. Instantly, she pulled away from Beau. "He'll tell you everything you want to know, trust me." I motioned to Beau but her mom beat her to it.

"What did you want to say, Beau?" Carine asked, sitting down in front of them. She crossed one leg over the other and leaned forward a little, tucking a slender fist in below her chin.

"I know it might sound crazy, but I was just thinking that… that…" Beau let out a stuttered breath and his face flushed so deep a shade of red I thought he was coming down with a fever.

"Just spit it out, Beau." I growled. My patience was dwindling away to nothing. Might as well rip the Band-Aid off now; let myself feel that burning sting. He looked from me to Edythe then back at Carine again, taking another breath.

"I think… I think that Edythe might be pregnant."

Dead. Silence.

Edythe's hand began to shake as she brought it to the place her jacket parted and she let out a breath, preparing for the impossible… and the inevitable.

She jumped up, scared. Like she was shocked with electricity. Like she was caught up in the worst kind of dream and was desperately searching for a way out; begging her brain to wake herself up and escape it all. But you can never quite run from yourself, can you? From what you are; from what's inside of you. Whatever it was.

"What is it?" asked Beau, seizing her hand.

"Thoughts." she breathed. "Thoughts… that are not my own. I can read them; I can feel them." She touched her stomach again and squeezed her eyes shut, like she was concentrating hard on a math test or something. "No, more like half thoughts – not fully formed thoughts. They come and go." she continued, blinking. She brought her fingers up to rest on her lips.

"That's impossible." I barked. It couldn't be – or, maybe I just didn't want it to be. I mean, maybe she was just picking up on someone else's thoughts around here; mine's, her siblings, parents. Hell, maybe it was just some nearby camper; some overzealous backpacker passing through this neck of the woods. That would explain things, surely. That was the only way to make things make sense. Carine gave Earnest a look before coming up to Edythe and I tugged on her sleeve as she passed by. "It's impossible, right?" I whispered, hearing this strange sense of urgency in my own voice and I fell back, waiting for her answer.

"I would think so – at least, it should be." She looked up at Edythe's scared face; rested her hand on her cheek. "A vampire's body is immutable; forever unchanging once turned. When you take a look at the female vampire body specifically, that would mean no menstruation, no ovulation, none of that. It cannot - or should not be able to - accommodate the changes which conception, pregnancy, and birth ultimately demand. It's simply-" she sucked in a breath, gnawing on her lip then turned a troubled glance on her daughter, "unheard of." Carine shook her head. "I can certainly attest that it is impossible for me, at least." she said, putting her hands on her chest. She sounded...sad. Earnest moved in beside her, hugging her close to try and comfort her. She fell into his arms, looking more than a little upset now. I guess it made me feel sort of bad for her, but I was still too stunned to fully register that.

"Us too." Eleanor piped in a tiny voice, stepping forward with her arm around Jessamine. Even Blondie reacted, jaw clenching tight and cheekbones buckling. I never took him for the "babies" type of guy, but maybe, just maybe, he actually was - because he looked sad, too.

I turned away, letting out the breath I'd been holding. I have questions. Lots and lots of questions.

I felt sick.

"Yeah? Then what the hell's wrong with her?" I whisper-shouted, jerking a thumb in Edythe's direction. Carine didn't have an answer for that. Anger was quickly taking hold of me again. I clicked my tongue, turning to look at Beau. My shoulders shrugged and my eyes just stared straight out at him. My lips trembled and I shook my head, feeling this strange heat bubbling up in the pit of my stomach when he opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. Why did it hurt? That's it; I was so done.

"This is crap." I tore my gaze from him and lurched away, escaping to the large window which looked out on the serenity of the forest behind the house, hoping it would calm me down. It didn't. My hands were balled up into two shaking fists and I slammed them against the glass, letting a breath out through my teeth. I was trapped.

"Jules, hey – just look at me." I ignored Beau's request, but he went on anyways. "It's just a theory, alright? We don't know anything for sure yet."

Oh, so now he was worried about my feelings?

I turned around quick. "Oh, I think you do. I think she does." I pointed directly at Edythe, "She is the mother of the thing, after all." I growled, my tone growing too sharp. But in that moment, I couldn't remember to care. He looked away in silence.

Here's the thing - I guess having seen Edythe like, well, that these past few days and about what she was seeing and what Archie wasn't; then the thought wasn't as crazy as I would have liked to think it was at first. It's impossible, really – at least, it should have been. But impossible things were happening every day, so what the hell did I know? Did anybody, really?

I let it sink in like hail against bare skin then turned around, my eyes finding Beau's. It hurt to see those beautiful blues; hurt me to look at him now.

"So, let me get this straight - my best friend slash boy I love somehow managed to knock up his vampire girlfriend." I crossed my arms over my chest, nodding very slowly. The statement burned on my tongue.

"Wife." he quickly interjected like it made a difference.

"Sorry, my bad." I said, not sounding very apologetic in the least. I pressed my lips tight together and shuddered, trilling my cheeks. Those words so don't belong in the same sentence together. Not one of them. Of course – they're obviously so perfect for each other that the guy I love gets the dead girl walking pregnant! It was like I was the punchline to some huge cosmic joke. I looked towards the sky which had since begun to darken through the skylight set in the roof of the house then slowly made my way to a window in the living room. I opened it, letting in the cool, damp air and feeling it blow against my face. I needed that. Didn't help the matter much, though.

"Jules." Beau tried again. I didn't answer him right away.

"You expect me to say, 'congratulations'? Or what?" I shot back in a hushed, angry whisper. Was he being serious right now?

He reached for my shoulder. I shook him off. "Jules, you don't understand - this wasn't supposed to happen. I didn't know." My eyes drifted to where Edythe stood in the living room. A hand was over her chin, another was on her stomach and she didn't even say a word. I turned back towards Beau and shook my head, hard.

"You're damn right it shouldn't have!" I shot back, feeling a lump forming in my throat. This was so wrong. Or, maybe I only felt it was wrong because of how much it hurt to hear. I ran my tongue over my lip and bit the inside of my cheek, trying hard to control the swirling mess of emotions inside me - it was really over now, wasn't it? I couldn't tell if I was more angry or sad - I wasn't even sure if I had the right to be either of those things; I just knew that regardless, it hurt my feelings. He hurt my feelings; he hurt me. And I hated that. Why did it have to be this way? It was a losing game. Just as I was about to say something else, Archie put a hand up to stop me and touched a finger to his temple. His eyes were closed but you could tell they were shifting beneath his eyelids, like a person in REM sleep. He grabbed a paper pad and a black gel pen, just scribbling out what looked like a bunch of gibberish to me on it. He dropped the pad and his eyes flew open.

"What is it?" Edythe asked, yanking the pad to her. Her eyes flicked from him to the paper and back again, a look of intense concentration flashing across her face as she pointed each bullet of garbled-up nonsense out to him with the clicker part of the pen.

"So, in other words – it's inevitable." Edythe whispered in a quivering voice.

Archie nodded. "So far, at least. They're going to find out one way or another."

"But why do they want Beau, too? I just don't understand." Her voice broke a little.

"I don't know, Edy. I'm so sorry."

"But I still don't get it - why would they get in trouble for that?" I asked. "It's just a kid, isn't it?"

Carine inhaled a sharp breath before answering my question. "Only the known is safe. It is one of the Volturi's mottos, per se." Edythe flinched when she heard the word "Volturi" and I think Carine caught that. She clamped her mouth shut, silent for a second. Then she tried making her voice a calm, even sound but I could tell she was struggling with that. "Obviously, if what we suspect is true, they will want to assess whether the child will pose a threat to our kind." She touched a hand to her temple and shivered, like she was recalling a bad memory. Edythe trembled, pulling her jacket even tighter around her.

"Yeah? Well, then you don't have to tell them squat. Simple. They'll be none the wiser." I shrugged. "Right?"

Carine sighed. "Of course, there are always ways to keep them in the dark. But it is much more complicated than that, Jules - the threat of exposure sooner or later is invariably high, and we will be implicated for our silence - all of us - should they ever find out we were keeping something like this from them in the first place. And…" her words trailed off as she took another breath.

"And what?" I asked.

"Perhaps their concern may be well-warranted, and that is where I am truly torn." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Perhaps… perhaps it is only right that they should know, because we do not even know what we are dealing with ourselves here."

"It's just a stupid baby. How dangerous can it be?" If it's anything like Beau, I think the only real danger the kid would pose is to himself. But if it was more like its mother…

My face turned white.

Maybe she had a point.

Carine looked like she was wanting to say something else but stopped herself, looking to Earnest with uncertain eyes instead. "Let's just say… it can be very dangerous." she finished in a low, shaking voice.

I swallowed. Great. It was all Edythe's fault and Beau was the one who had to pay the price.

Why? Why, why, why?

"I'm out." I knew how this would end, and I wasn't sticking around to see it through. I turned and walked with quick strides to the front door, reaching for the handle.

"Jules." I felt Beau's eyes on me and stopped.

"What do you want from me, Beau?"

"To stay. Please."

But it hurts.

"Give me one good reason why I should do that."

"Because I'm scared, Jules. I can't do this without you." His face came right up to mine, his hand tight on my shoulder. I tried not to look at him because I knew that if I did, I wouldn't be able to leave.

"You tell your pregnant wife that." I glared back at Edythe instead and shook off Beau's grip on me. It was my own version of sanity; the one thing I could do to protect my own self.

"I'm scared for her, Jules. I know I have no right to ask you this, but please. Just help me to protect her." His eyes trembled as he turned towards Edythe. It was true - he had no right. But for all that, why couldn't I deny those trembling eyes? Why couldn't I protect myself from him? Edythe caught his look and she walked up to him slowly, like every step she took was weighed down with lead, and fell into his arms.

"I'm so sorry, Beau." She pressed her cheek to his chest, hiding her face in it.

"No, I'm sorry." he whispered in her hair. For what though, it was hard to tell. For falling in love with her? For getting her pregnant? For everything else? Shouldn't he be saying sorry to me, too? I rubbed my eyes with the palms of my hands. I shouldn't be this hurt. I couldn't.

I didn't say anything for a long time. I shut the window with both hands and stayed looking at them as I thought of the whole mess of it all. My chest clenched up, that hotness bubbling and bubbling inside me until I just couldn't take it anymore.

"How did this happen? Why did it have to happen?" I cried out, asking no one in particular at first. I turned my burning gaze on Carine, who'd taken a step closer to me, arms out like she was trying to calm me down or something. "You're the doctor here, aren't you? How'd that happen, huh? You said yourself that it should be impossible. She's freaking dead, for crying out loud! Her whole system is shot; she's literal dust, isn't she? You all are. There's no way she could actually give life, she could only take them." I scoffed, my voice coming out louder than I intended it to. I was glaring directly at Edythe now, anger, and fear, impelling each thought I could think to vocalize. "That's all bloodsuckers are good for." My tone only grew more abusive with every word I said. I know I can have a sharp tongue, and some would say I knew how to cut you where it would hurt. I call it just being honest.

Jules!" Beau's voice rose. He looked upset. "Stop it." He reached for me and Earnest took his place beside Edythe, pulling her close. I watched her there, how she buried her head in Earnest's chest. How his arms wrapped tight around her. A father's hug. Looking at them now, I remembered my own father's arms; how safe I'd felt in them. Dad always made everything better. And I hated that the sight before me could make me miss him so much on top of everything else.

Beau's hand was still tight on my wrist. "Don't touch me." I yanked myself free from his grip with ease, lurching away. I just wanted to run from it all; to leave, and to never come back.

"Honey, I don't know." Carine said, throwing her hands up. "I don't know." There was a flicker of pain in her eyes when she said it, like those angry words I'd spoken earlier really did hurt her and I almost felt bad again for saying them, because I knew I was being cruel. "I have never seen this; I have never heard of this even once before in our history. Not even during my time with… them." Carine made sure to steer clear of the word "Volturi" now for her daughter's sake. You can't say bloodsuckers weren't polite creatures, I guess.

"Yeah, because it's freaking impossible, that's why. And now you've got a target on your back because of her." I whispered it, shooting a look at Beau then Edythe.

"It takes two, Julie." Archie said, putting an arm around Edythe. Why did he have to go and bring that up now?

"I'm well aware." I growled, but closed my eyes and let out a shaking breath, trying very hard to calm myself. "Temperament like a boy," my dad would say almost proudly before the accident. Beau reached a hand out to me again, but I dodged it. "I'm going out for some fresh air. Don't follow me." I finished, eyeing him especially. He lowered his hand and I disappeared into the blackness of night. Phasing, I sped off into the forest with no intention of ever coming back.

I let out a howl and whined a little, blinking back the tears I could feel settling in behind my eyes.