Author's Notes

Slight overlap between POVs, nothing too major.

Chapter 4: Day Visit

Lily I

Sunday, 6 June 1976

Lily woke up at approximately 6:00 AM and found herself lying in bed for what seemed like an age. She eventually got ready before making her way down to the common room. The events of last night were replaying in her head, over and over. 7:30. The time was stuck in her head. All she had to do was meet with Snape once and listen to what he had to say. Odds are, it wouldn't have meant anything, but at least she could tell him and have some form of closure.

"Almost ready, Lily?"

"Coming!" Lily finished dressing and ran out of the bathroom, joining Marlene McKinnon on the couch. "Morning, Marley!"

"Is Mary coming?"

"First: she's a second-year. Second: she's grounded."

"Ouch. Mercy, Mum."

Lily smacked Marlene on the shoulder, causing the other girl to shriek and jump away. "She was out of bed at 11:00 last night!"

"I know," Marlene replied, straightening herself out. "I could hear you from the dorm. Couldn't have at least used that Muffliato, could you?"

Lily sighed. "Look, I… I had a bad night. I'm sorry."

"Nobody's perfect," Marlene said, wrapping her arm around Lily. "Especially not us Gryffindor girls."

Lily stopped herself from laughing. "Right then. So, Hogsmeade?"

"Absolutely. Might be one of the last Hogsmeade trips before… you know."

Lily looked at Marlene. She knew what she was talking about, but she wished it wouldn't be…. "Please tell me you're not talking about that stupid House Nobility nonsense."

"Nonsense? It's tradition! And a little bird told me you're guaranteed to be Gryffindor's Princess."

Lily… hated… the House Nobility tradition. Concocted at some point during the 17th century, or so Marley said, House Nobility was an unspoken rule in all four Houses. Each House had four top-ranking students based on year and status, distinct from the role of Prefects; the King and Queen would be the top-ranking seventh-year boy and girl, while the Prince and Princess would be the top-ranking sixth-year boy and girl. Typically, the Prince and Princess were next in line to inherit the 'throne', but they could lose their status if they lost favor from the House. Everyone kept on and on about how James Potter and Lily Evans would be the future Prince and Princess of Gryffindor.

"Marley," Lily moaned. "I don't want to do that!"

"Well, you shouldn't have been sorted into Gryffindor."

"I wish I'd been sorted into Slytherin."

"Come now, it's not that bad! Besides, why would you want to be in the same House as Snivellus?"

7:30. Lily took a steady breath, in and out. "Listen," Lily said. "Don't talk to me about him, alright?"

"I'm sorry… I thought you were over it…."

"How can I get over it if everyone talks about it?"

"I'll stop." Marlene squeezed Lily's shoulder. "I promise. Well, I'll try to stop anyway. Might muck it up."

Lily nodded. "Thanks."

"Now, how about we eat Chocolate Cauldrons until we puke?"

"You had me at 'chocolate'!" Lily and Marlene jumped as Remus hopped down the stairs, a skip in his step. "No Mary?"

"Remus."

"Right, of course…. She needs to get over Cattermole."

"Cattermole?" Marlene sounded disgusted. "That ferret?"

"We don't know either," Lily said. "Maybe she just likes older men?"

"She needs to calm herself down." Marlene jumped off the couch, pulling Lily with her. "So, breakfast?"

"Lead the way."

Lily and Remus followed Marlene to the Great Hall, and they sat down. Almost immediately, Remus began piling food on his plate.

"Honestly, you should just take the whole platter," Marlene said. "You'll eat it all, anyway."

"I have, what Muggles call, 'table manners'," Remus retorted. He began cutting a tall stack of pancakes down the middle before digging in. "Perhaps you should learn them?"

"Har-har." Marlen snatched a piece of one of Remus's pancakes and stuffed it in her mouth, exchanging a smirk with Lily.

"So," Lily asked Remus, "How did your meeting go yesterday?"

"Well," Remus said, rather uncomfortably. "I wasn't punished, but I was given the option to either step down or take my job more seriously. I think the badge speaks for itself." He loaded his fork full of pancake bits and shoved it into his mouth.

Marlene shook her head at him. "I don't know how you stay so skinny when you wolf everything down."

Suddenly, Remus was choking, beating his chest as he drank some pumpkin juice. He gasped and paused, gulping air.

"You alright?"

"Fantastic, Marley," Remus replied. He took another sip. "Wrong pipe."

"I should think so," Lily said. "How exactly do you plan on fitting chocolate into that bottomless pit if you fill up on pancakes and sausage?"

"How exactly does one fill up a bottomless pit?" Remus smirked.

"Good morning, everyone!" Lily recognized the booming voice of Kingsley Shacklebolt as he and Alastor Moody waltzed into the Great Hall. Both were weeks away from graduation and starting their training to become Aurors.

"Morning, King!" Marlene waved the two Gryffindor boys over. "Morning, Moody!"

"McKinnon. Evans. Lupin." Moody sat down at the table and stared a hole through each item on the table.

"It's not poisoned, Alastor," Kingsley said. He sat down across from Remus.

"That's what they want you to think," Moody replied. "If that Potter boy can spike the entire Slytherin table with that infernal Dragon Pepper Sauce, Merlin knows what to expect in retaliation."

"That was in his third year," Kingsley retorted.

"Slytherins have patience," Moody re-retorted. "But I have vigilance."

"Nothing gets past you, eh Moody?" Marlene nudged Moody playfully.

Moody turned abruptly at her touch and stared a hole through her. Marlene scooted away slightly.

"Sorry," Marlene muttered. "Didn't mean to spook you."

"So," Lily said, "Is Frank still thinking about being an Auror?"

Kingsley nodded. "He is, yes."

"Stupid man," Moody muttered loudly. "Becoming an Auror because his girlfriend wants to. Bloody Hufflepuff nonsense."

"Wife, actually," Marlene corrected. "They got married over the Easter holiday, if you recall."

"Alice Longbottom," Lily said. "Might take some getting used to."

"The King of Hufflepuff and the Queen of Gryffindor," Marlene mused.

"That… bloody tradition," Lily exhaled.

Kingsley smirked. "Don't worry, Lily. With Marlene as your competition, you won't be in any danger of being chosen."

"I abdicate," Marlene quickly said, snatching an apple and taking a crunchy bite.

"You're not even the Princess, yet," Remus remarked.

"Pre-emptive abdication," Marlene grinned. "My vote goes to Lily, anyway. As does Mary's."

"Speaking of Mary," Kingsley said, his smile receding, "Alice told me about what happened last night. Good work on finding her."

"Actually," Remus replied, "She found us. She was upset about finding Snape in the Owlery."

Moody's eyes darted to Remus. "Snape?"

"Why was he in the Owlery?" Kingsley was stoic, but Lily could tell by his subtle mannerisms that he was concerned.

7:30. Lily played with her food to keep herself distracted.

"Not sure," Remus said, "But when Lily went to find him, he was gone."

7:30.

"That late at night, he must've been sending letters to someone. Someone he wanted no one to find out about." Moody had taken out his flask and begun drinking.

7:30.

"The next time you see him, you'll need to deduct points." Kingsley had helped himself to some bubble and squeak. "Or give him detention."

"Speak of the devil," Remus muttered.

Lily followed Remus's eyes and froze. Snape had walked into the Great Hall at a brisk pace and sat down at a random spot facing the rest of the room. He had barely touched anything before an owl swooped down and landed next to him. Lily couldn't quite tell what he was doing, but the next second, he had stood back up and rushed out of the Great Hall, nearly running into a crowd of students.

"I'll get him," Kingsley said.

"Allow me," Remus said, finishing his mountainous plate of food. "I could do with the exercise."

Severus I

S.S.
Chocolate Frogs
8:00 AM
This will not be offered again
A.P.W.B.D.

Severus raced to the gargoyle, having only just received the message ten minutes to nine. He quickly blurted out, "Chocolate Frog!"

The gargoyle was still.

"...Chocolate Frogs?"

The gargoyle shifted and allowed Severus through.

Damn pedantry.

Severus opened the door to find Albus Dumbledore sitting at his desk, calmly looking his way. "Welcome, Mr. Snape," Dumbledore said. "I trust this is a good time?"

"It is. I apologize for declining the last offer. I should have-"

"No need to apologize." Dumbledore reclined in his chair. "Come and sit. I believe you have something to speak with me about."

"Y-yes." Severus sat down and gripped his pantlegs nervously. "It…. There's something I need to tell you… and I don't know if you'll believe me."

"I have been surprised in the past, Mr. Snape, by things I had once believed to be impossible. Feel free to speak your mind."

Severus took a deep breath. "Headmaster… I… I have a voice inside my head."

Dumbledore's expression went blank, his half-moon glasses reflecting Severus's eyes. "Whose voice?"

"... mine."

"... I believe that to be a normal occurrence, unless-"

"No, no, it's not… it's me, but it's… a future me."

"Let me see if I can understand this: you're hearing the voice of your future self?"

Severus nodded. "But it's not just his voice. In his words… actually, it might be easier if you use Legilimency on me."

Dumbledore leaned forward, crossing his fingers. "And what would I see?"

"A white void, I think. With myself, possibly, and my other self. My older self. I call him Professor Snape." Severus put his hands on the desk.

Dumbledore nodded. "I see. Curious to have such a connection. Look directly into my eyes, if you would." Dumbledore pulled out his wand as Severus did as he was told. "Legilimens."

Both Severus and Dumbledore were thrown into a void of white, with the former landing on his face and the latter stumbling to keep balance. Severus quickly shot up from his prone position and looked around, spotting Professor Snape approaching them.

"Well," Professor Snape said, "I'm glad we can finally get down to business, Albus."

Dumbledore looked between Severus and Professor Snape. He turned back to the professor and said, "I see we're on a first name basis."

"I was your spy against the Dark Lord," Professor Snape replied. "But we can discuss your future, and my past, later on. For now, let me give you the abridged version: I have been sent back in time, to share a body with my past self, for the purpose of defeating the Dark Lord and saving Lily's life."

"Lily-" Dumbledore stopped himself. "Are you referring to Miss Evans?"

"The same," Professor Snape answered.

"But not your Lily. Your younger self's Lily."

"No. Still my Lily. This may take some time to explain, but we shall see how long it takes."

"What will you tell me?"

"Everything."

Remus I

Snape was surprisingly nimble. If his foot speed could translate into Quidditch, he would have made one hell of a Seeker. Remus barely managed to keep pace with him, up until the other boy had turned the corner. Remus thought he had maintained his footing, but he slipped as he turned the corner, skidding and crashing into the stone wall. He regained his bearings and continued on, but… he was gone.

Remus let out a sigh of frustration as he slowed to a pace, pinching the bridge of his nose as he leaned against a wall. The Map. He pulled the Map out of his back pocket and took out his wand. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." He watched as the Map came to life, and he began looking through it until he found the name. Severus Snape, in the Headmaster's Office, with Dumbledore.

Why would…? This raised more questions than provided answers. It made sense that Snape would be in the Headmaster's Office for some sort of disciplinary action, but Snape had rushed out of the Great Hall. And Snape never seemed like the type to rush toward punishment.

Remus put the Map away and made his way to the Headmaster's Office, arriving in front of the gargoyle. "Chocolate Frog."

The gargoyle remained stationary.

"Chocolate Frogs?"

There was no change.

Now, Remus was even more confused. He could have sworn that was the password. Lily had told him it was the password, and Lily never got it wrong. Unless Dumbledore had purposely locked the gargoyle in place, to prevent anyone interrupting his meeting with… Snape. Even thinking about it, the situation made no sense. Aside from the Shrieking Shack incident, he had never heard of Snape being anywhere near Dumbledore, let alone earning a highly private audience with him.

Remus wasn't sure whether to wait outside or find a better time to find Snape and discipline him. He knew he could come up with excuses not to wait; the trip to Hogsmeade, Snape's disdain for him, Dumbledore having already known about the excursion, hence the meeting. But he remembered his promise to Dumbledore. Could he really just leave without doing his job? If the badges were anything to go by, Dumbledore might review the memories those badges contained to check on Remus's progress. But surely, he would understand, right?

Remus took a deep breath to focus, before making his decision.

Lily II

Lily and Marlene had arrived at the carriages some time after Remus had gone after Snape, and Marlene was busy discussing their itinerary.

"So," Marlene continued, "I'll need to get a new cauldron, so maybe we could stop there before Honeydukes?"

"Not after?"

"I need something to carry all the sweets in."

"You're going to get cavities before we graduate."

"I don't know what that means."

Lily sighed. "It's a tooth problem Muggles have." People from wizarding families never had to worry about certain Muggle afflictions, and it had taken Lily a significant amount of time to figure out what they did and didn't share. Even by the end of fifth-year, Lily wasn't done learning.

"Is that the one with the holes?"

"Yes."

"Gross… good thing I'm a witch." Marlene grinned.

"Muggle diseases again, Marley?" Remus appeared out of nowhere and ran to catch up with the two.

"Hey," Marlene said. "Yeah, 'cavities' this time."

"Ah, right. Thank God I'm a wizard."

"How come you're not going to Hogsmeade with the boys?" Marlene asked.

"Apparently," Remus explained, "their parents have revoked their Hogsmeade privileges for the remainder of the term."

"... isn't that just two weeks?"

"Right." Remus looked both disappointed and relieved. "Granted, Sirius might have a less-than-ideal homecoming."

"I imagine," Lily said. Sirius Black was, quite obviously, a member of the Noble House of Black. Most witches and wizards, while never openly speaking of it, knew of the family's… inclinations.

"Poor boy," Marlene muttered. "Makes you wonder why the Ministry doesn't allow minors to seek asylum from their families."

"Well," Remus replied, "I don't think they're opposed to minors living elsewhere."

"But they don't go out of their way to protect those in need," Marlene retorted. "They just sit back until they stumble upon the truth, and then they do nothing until someone gets hurt or killed…. Sirius doesn't stand a chance, now that his family knows about his rivalry with a fellow Slytherin. Even if it is Snivellus."

Lily's breath caught.

"In any event," Remus continued, "we can't do much for him. It's possible James will help him out if it's too hard."

"I should think so." Marlene hopped onto one of the carriages and pulled Lily with her, sitting her by her side. "Thick as thieves, those two are."

Remus sat across from them as the carriage began to carry them off.

Lily looked back at the castle. "Remus, did you catch Snape?"

"No," Remus admitted. "Funnily enough, he was already in the Headmaster's Office."

"What?" Marlene's eyebrows disappeared into her hairline. "Is that so? Maybe Snivvy's finally getting booted?"

7:30. The damn time wouldn't go away. Lily squeezed her hands shut a few times to relieve some tension. Why was he with Dumbledore? What had he done? Had he done anything at all? "I don't think he'd be expelled for sneaking around at night," Lily said.

Marlene sighed. "Well, a girl can dream."

They eventually arrived at Hogsmeade, and Marlene and Lily dragged Remus through the village, starting their trip with Zonko's Joke Shop despite the boy's protests. Marlene bought several items of questionable repute, and she hid them in her purse with an Extension Charm. Next on their list was basic school supplies, and they went through Scrivenshafts for quills and quill needs, J. Pippin's Potions for ingredients and Ceridwen's Cauldrons for the Potions O.W.L. tomorrow, and finally stopping at Honeydukes for the long-awaited Chocolate Cauldrons, for which Remus spent the remainder of his monthly allowance.

As they stepped out, Lily spotted two familiar faces making their way to the Hog's Head, both of whom she was not too fond of. She recognized the blonde ponytail of Lucius Malfoy and the black ponytail of Regulus Black; the latter had always been pretentious, and not until today did she recognize the lengths that boy would go to build his image as a 'pureblood aristocrat'. She turned her back to them and followed Remus and Marlene back to the carriages.

Regulus I

"So," Lucius began. "Let's begin with the address…."

Regulus struggled not to shift uncomfortably. "An error on my part."

"Indeed. However, you corrected yourself, albeit at a later time."

Regulus nodded. "I believe that Snape will need some support at this time. It must be difficult for him to lose his mother."

"Did he appear affected?"

"Truth be told, I am unsure. If I knew when she had passed, I might remember if Snape began behaving differently. He has grown more volatile since January, so it may have occurred then."

"You did not specify her cause of death."

"Neither did Snape. However, I noticed he was acting differently the morning he informed me. He was much calmer, more withdrawn."

Lucius tilted his head in thought. "That reminds me of his first year. He did not come into his own until later, yes?"

"That is difficult to say." Regulus crossed one leg over the other. "Aside from Miss Evans, Snape has never been known to socialize with others, at least not in a positive manner."

"You must be referring to-"

"Dobby has drinks, Master Lucius!"

Regulus and Lucius turned their heads to find two house-elves bringing drinks. In the hands of the younger Dobby was a glass of elf-made wine, while the older Kreacher held a glass of water.

"Thank you, Dobby," Lucius gritted through his teeth. He seemed to struggle taking the wine glass without yanking it out of Dobby's hand.

Regulus gently took the glass of water from Kreacher and said, "Thank you, Kreacher."

Both house-elves bowed their heads and kept quiet.

Lucius cleared his throat and began again. "You must be referring to the Muggle-born witch, yes? Red hair, green eyes? Gryffindor?"

Regulus nodded in confirmation. "One and the same. Very recently, however, she and Snape came to a disagreement, where Snape spoke of her in… unsavory terms."

Lucius's flat expression twitched. "Ah…. And… the result of this encounter was…?"

"Let it suffice to say that Snape's list of friends has grown shorter."

"I see." Lucius took a sip of wine, concealing the grin on his face. He set the glass down as he said, "Well… in that case, I must agree with your assessment. Snape must feel rather lonely, I would wager."

"I believe so…. And regarding his desire to remain at Hogwarts over the summer…. What are your thoughts?"

"Well," Lucius replied, "That would depend on his reasons for staying."

"He mentioned… domestic problems."

"Ah." Lucius swirled the wine in the glass gently. "I see. And you believe this to be his sole reason?"

"I believe it to be an effective argument," Regulus answered. "Dumbledore may allow this, and he might possibly watch over him, considering the circumstances."

"Is that so?" Lucius set the glass down. "Do you believe Snape and the headmaster will bond over this?"

"I doubt it," Regulus replied. "When Snape spoke of his plans for the summer holiday, he believed Dumbledore would be too compassionate to deny his request. I believe it to be nothing but an excuse. A ruse."

"Well," Lucius said, "Even if that is the case, it does not mean the excuse is invalid. Perhaps, if you are available, we could pay the Snape household a visit before summer? We should assess Snape's homelife… for his own wellbeing, of course. Perhaps we could speak with him at the dinner party Professor Slughorn is hosting?"

Regulus was about to nod, but he hesitated.

"Is something the matter?"

"I only now remember that Snape will not be attending the party. I believe it to be related to the incident with Miss Evans, as Professor Slughorn favors her."

"I see." Lucius wore an icy expression. "In any event, we can always have a quick outing to visit the home, even if Snape is not there. Simply to see the neighborhood, of course. Spinner's End, yes?"

"Yes," Regulus nodded.

"Then we shall prepare for that outing. Perhaps after the party ends?"

"If I am permitted to leave," Regulus nods.

"The 12th of June, correct?"

"Correct."

"The 13th is when Rodolphus and Bellatrix, along with other guests, arrive, and so I will be inviting you to attend. We should leave on the night of the 12th, as they will be arriving in the morning."

Regulus nodded. "Of course. Thank you for the invitation."

Remus II

"Alright, Moony?" James was fiddling with his Snitch as Remus walked into the dormitory with his goods and supplies. "Looks like you're ready for Potions tomorrow."

"Indeed," Remus replied. "And I have a bit of celebratory chocolate for when we're finished."

"With Potions?"

"O.W.L.s."

"Can't wait for it to end," Sirius sighed, lying flat on his bed. He stretched his arms and legs out as he kicked off his shoes. "Wish we could go to Hogsmeade, though."

"Well," Remus replied, "maybe if you stopped-"

"Shut up about Snivellus," Sirius groaned. "Let me wallow, will you?"

"Well," Peter said timidly, "we still have Saturday night to look forward to."

Remus shot Peter a look. "Looking forward to it indeed," Remus replied sarcastically.

"I didn't- sorry, that's not what I meant." Peter sat down on his bed.

"I know," Remus said. "I'm just a bit on-edge about it."

"Don't worry, mate," James said. "You'll be alright."

Remus nodded as he began sorting out his materials for tomorrow. "By the way, Snape's acting strangely."

"Do you have any idea how vague that sounds?" Sirius asked.

"I mean strange in comparison to his normal behavior. Did you hear about what he did last night?"

"Owlery, right?" James went over to his own bed. "Scared MacDonald half to death."

"Well, I saw him earlier this morning, and he started running out of the Great Hall before he had even touched his food."

"Where was he going?" Peter asked.

"Dumbledore."

All three boys looked at Remus.

"Come again?" James said.

"He ran off to Dumbledore's office. And for some reason, the gargoyle wouldn't let me up."

"So… just to clarify… he ran… in the direction of Dumbledore… as opposed to away from him?" Sirius didn't seem to understand the concept. "No, that doesn't make sense."

"The Map doesn't lie," Remus replied. He pulled it out and showed them. "Look, he's still there."

Sirius snatched the Map, and both James and Peter jumped next to him to look. "... I think I get it now," Sirius said. "You-Know-Who wants an inside man. Maybe using Snivellus as some sort of way in. Shouldn't be hard for him to sell a sob-story to Dumbledore."

"But… it's Dumbledore," Peter said, confused. "I don't think Snivvy's smart enough to trick him."

"But also not smart enough to know it won't work," James argued. "Dumbledore'll put him in his place."

"Too bad he's not in his majority," Sirius mused. "Then again, maybe Azkaban's started a juvenile program."

As the three other boys continued thinking up all the different ways Snape could be punished, Remus opened one of his textbooks to prepare for tomorrow's exam. In time, the voices faded away, leaving him to the words on the page.

Severus II

Dumbledore was crying.

It wasn't loud, obnoxious Gryffindor moaning, nor was it blubbering, sentimental Hufflepuff sobbing. It barely qualified as shaky, subdued Ravenclaw weeping. This was stoic, unyielding Slytherin shedding. At least, Severus thought that was the case; that's how he imagined other Slytherins would cry, anyway.

Dumbledore dabbed his eyes with a lilac handkerchief as the two of them sat in the office. The old man had chosen to review Professor Snape's memories in the Pensieve to confirm if the circumstances were true. Severus had chosen not to look, as he had no desire to see what his original summer holiday would be like that year. But Dumbledore had seen in, and based on his eyes, Severus knew it had to have been bad.

"Severus," Dumbledore said after a while. The tears were gone, but his eyes were the same. "I'm sorry."

Severus didn't know how to process that. "... I forgive you…?"

"I will arrange for boarding at the school," Dumbledore continued. "But for now, let us review the remainder of your memories: not all at once, but over time. Or rather, the professor's memories. Here, take this." Dumbledore handed Severus a Galleon.

I remember this.

"So we did use this, then?" Dumbledore asked.

Indeed. Not always, but sometimes.

Severus's eyes widened slightly. "You can hear him?"

"Yes," Dumbledore replied. "Now that I've confirmed who the voice is, there's no need to use Legilimency to communicate. Now then, about your shared theories on Voldemort's anchors…. You believe there to have been seven, but not yet?"

That is our current theory, but we have nothing to substantiate the claim. Based on the time, two of the seven are not yet relevant, which drops the number to five.

"I see…. Do you know the name of this Dark Magic?"

"Do you?"

"Unfortunately, no. However, if what you've said about Professor Slughorn is true, then it's very possible his memories hold the answers."

"I see," Severus said dejectedly.

"What is it, my boy?"

"... I'm sure you're aware of Thursday's events."

"Ah…. And would I be correct in assuming Professor Slughorn has developed a poor opinion of you?"

Severus nodded. "And as it's near the end of the year, I don't think I'll be able to change his opinion anytime soon."

"Yes," Dumbledore nodded. "Knowing him, it may take some time. You mentioned that your Dumbledore had an altered memory, yes?"

You don't?

"No," Dumbledore replied. "Unfortunately not. It must be the case that I did not collect Slughorn's memory until a later point in time. Judging by your surprise, you must not know when this occurred. Although, based on your description of me, I doubt you ever learned of it until after your death."

That would be accurate.

Severus asked, "So, what do we do?"

"I'm afraid there's not much to do at all," Dumbledore replied. "Not until the start of next year."

"Next year?!" Severus felt his hands shake. "Next- Headmaster, I can't wait that long!"

"I understand your concern," Dumbledore said softly. "But as you have said, it will take time for Professor Slughorn to change his opinion of you. But that does not mean we can't prepare."

Severus was silent for a moment. "How would we be preparing?"

"It is my belief," Dumbledore explained, "that you and the professor inside your head should be as aligned with each other as possible, and as soon as possible, so that you may utilize the professor's knowledge. Therefore, I would ask that the professor show you his memories in full over the summer holiday, so that you gain both his knowledge and experience."

No.

Severus was surprised.

"No, Professor?" Dumbledore's voice didn't give away how he felt.

You know exactly what we've been through. I will not subject myself to it for a second time.

Dumbledore sighed softly. "I understand. But I cannot agree with your opinion on the matter. It is imperative that you do this-"

For the Greater Good, Albus? I'm well-versed in the Greater Good. In fact, one might say that, of all your colleagues, I was the most intimate with the Greater Good.

"Professor," Dumbledore said, "You cannot hold me accountable for actions I haven't committed-"

But I can hold you accountable for what you ask of me now. If you believe, for one second, that I would force twenty-two years of memories into the mind of a boy, you are sorely bloody mistaken.

"I ask too much-"

Always too much-

"I'll do it."

Professor Snape was silent.

Dumbledore was silent.

Severus repeated, "I'll do it. Over the summer… I'll look through my memories."

My memories.

"Our memories." Severus rubbed his forehead, feeling the cold sweat beginning to form. "I… don't want to… but if it means protecting… I'll do it."

I refuse to put you through that-

"You refused to change your ways until it was too late," Severus cut in. "And because of you, we lost Lily twice. I refuse to be you."

Professor Snape didn't respond.

"But because of you," Severus continued, "time was reversed. My Lily, our Lily, hasn't died yet. You know we have to do whatever it takes."

… I had not expected us to be this way.

"You never tried this way before," Severus said. "How could you have known?"

If this is what you wish… then our way forward is clear.

Severus felt something snap inside his head and reknit back together. He looked to Dumbledore, who was sitting silently, watching attentively as the conversation had unfolded. Dumbledore finally said, "Sometimes… I believe we sort too early."

That is the second time I've heard you say that.

"Would it not be the first, considering-"

I am well aware of how time works, yes.

"Of course." Dumbledore stood from his chair. "Well, I had hoped we could review more, but for now, I believe it is time for our meeting to end. It is, after all, past dinner."

"Past-" Severus checked the clock. 9:00. "We've been here for thirteen hours?!" That would explain the meals they had received during Professor Snape's explanation of the circumstances.

"I apologize for keeping you," Dumbledore said. He took out a small badge and handed it to Severus. "Wear this for tonight, and the Prefects will know you have special permission to be out of bed after hours. I would advise returning directly to your dormitory."

"Of course," Severus said, nodding. He stood from his seat. "Good night, Headmaster. Thank you for your help."

"Good night," Dumbledore said, smiling slightly.

Severus left the Headmaster's Office, and a wave of relief passed through him. He hadn't been sure how long it would have taken to meet with Dumbledore, but he had done it. With the first step out of the way, he began thinking of the other steps as he made his way down the spiraling staircase. He had reservations about receiving memories of a time that no longer existed, but if it could somehow help with his goal, he would go through with it.

You will need to mentally prepare yourself for the process. I am unsure of how your mind will handle it, so we will need to develop our Occlumency.

I see, so Occlumency can help by containing and pushing down the incoming memories.

Perhaps. We will perform a rudimentary test when we return to bed. I will show you memories of what originally happened between Lily ending our friendship and now.

But… wasn't that just staying in the dorm?

In bed, yes. A fairly simple starting point, with very little stimulus other than emotions.

How… did we at least have water?

We did, yes. A cup and Aguamenti.

Severus thought about what he must have felt at the time, had Professor Snape not entered his mind. The night following the incident, he had reached a new low, something not even his parents could bring him to. A feeling of worthlessness and self-loathing. If he had a chance to undo what he had done, he would take it. But the idea of Lily ever forgiving him-

Severus turned the corner and found Lily walking his way. Both froze in place, unsure of how to act. Lily seemed to be performing her nightly patrols, as her wand was alight. Severus wanted to speak, but he remembered what had happened the previous night. If she hadn't arrived after three hours, the odds that she has even remotely interested in reconciling were close to-

"Snape." Lily was the first to speak. "You're out of bed again."

"Dumbledore," Severus replied, pointing back the way he came.

"Dumbledore?" Lily raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. She looked at the badge on his robe. "Can't imagine why."

"Personal," Severus replied. "Reasons. Personal reasons."

Outstanding effort.

Don't.

"So if I went to Dumbledore, would he confirm this?"

Severus nodded, breaking eye contact first. "I'll be going to bed now."

"I see. About-"

Severus needed to leave. He quickly passed her, giving her no time to finish her sentence. His heart was racing, and he believed his hands would be shaking if not for his brisk movement down the corridor. He ran one hand through his hair to calm himself, and he made his way through the castle, all the way down into the dungeons where the Slytherin common room was.

Severus entered, went into the boys' dormitory, and ran into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him as he stripped and threw himself into the shower. Cold water blasted him as he breathed in and out, letting the cold water numb his emotions as he Occluded. His breathing was shaky, and his eyes stung. He shut his eyes, took a few deep breaths, and opened them again, the stinging gone. Eventually, the feelings subsided, and he felt a collected calm pooling within.

She wanted to speak with you.

I know.

And you chose to run away with your tail between your legs.

How do you think that conversation would've gone?

I imagine it would involve mutual outrage, followed by you stumbling over your words, resulting in Lily claiming victory.

… was that-

Every argument with Lily.

Severus thought about what Professor Snape said. So, things got worse-

-because of your poor communication skills.

Our.

I have achieved a greater mastery over the English language. You, on the other hand, have not. Now then, finish showering and go to bed. We need to develop our Occlumency….

Lily III

"I see. About-"

Before she could finish her sentence, Snape quickly walked past her and down the corridor.

"Snape!" Lily called after him. "Don't you walk away from me!"

Snape had no reaction whatsoever, his pace quickening.

Lily stood in place, processing what had just happened. When she had run into him, he'd originally looked… at peace, oddly enough. Of course, this soon changed the second he had laid eyes on her, his relaxed demeanor quickly shifting to one of… well, she wasn't quite sure. Was it fear…? No, that couldn't be it. She swore she saw his mouth move slightly, as if to speak. And then, when asked, he mentioned Dumbledore, for 'personal reasons'. She was half-tempted to go to Dumbledore. In fact….

Lily rounded the corner and strode to the gargoyle, saying, "Chocolate Frogs." The gargoyle stepped aside, and Lily hurried up the steps to see the headmaster. As she opened the door, she noticed the old wizard setting a large dish aside.

Dumbledore looked up and smiled. "Good evening, Miss Evans. How may I help you?"

Lily hesitated, but she replied, "Headmaster…. Last night, Mr. Snape was out of bed, after hours, in the Owlery." And whose fault was that?

"I see. And have you spoken to him regarding the incident?"

"I haven't had the chance. I was about to, but he left before I could." You let him go.

Dumbledore nodded. "Well, I believe it would be in your best interest to speak to him before the summer holiday arrives."

Lily didn't know what those words meant. "Sir?"

"Mr. Snape has requested summer housing at Hogwarts for personal reasons," Dumbledore explained. "Only should he wish to reveal his reasons to you will you learn why."

Summer- "Is that even allowed, headmaster?"

"Typically, no. However, I will not explain my reasons for allowing this exception. As I'm sure you understand, it is not my place, nor is it your right to know."

"Of course." Lily didn't know whether to be concerned for Snape or irritated by the headmaster's refusal to answer.

"Forgive me for prying," Dumbledore said, "but I was wondering how you were feeling, considering the history you have with Mr. Snape."

How would he know about that?

"I realize you must be surprised, but I must confess I am much more aware of the wellbeing of my students than you may realize." It was almost as if Dumbledore had read her mind.

"I see," Lily said, shifting uncomfortably. "Well… then you must be aware of the-"

"Black Lake incident, yes. As well as the decline of your friendship over the course of your time here. I am not one to interfere with the relationships between my students, so I will refrain from giving you advice. Should you need anything, feel free to come to me."

"Thank you, sir."

"Good night, Miss Evans."

"Good night." Lily turned and left the office, heading down the stairs and passing the gargoyle.

Summer housing?

Lily knew, through Alice, that a handful of the seventh-years were spending the summer at Hogwarts. Based on what was written, it sounded as though the Ministry had permitted Hogwarts to be used as an Auror training ground, which somewhat made sense. But that didn't explain why Snape was staying. Granted, his parents wouldn't object to it, but that also wasn't an explanation. Unless there was some ulterior motive for staying, she couldn't imagine….

A thought entered Lily's mind. She had heard rumors of a secret society dedicated to fighting You-Know-Who and his gang of Death Eaters. Some of the students believed Dumbledore was the leader of this group, and Lily began thinking about what the Auror training program might be about. Was Dumbledore training members for his society? Possibly, but was Snape involved? Is Snape a recruit? Impossible. There was no way Snape would fight against the Death Eaters; for Godric's sake, he was planning on joining them….

Unless he was a spy.

Lily almost tripped on her way down the corridor. Could that be it? Was he spying for the Death Eaters? Surely, Dumbledore would have enough sense to see through him… right? Maybe he had changed. But then, a thought occurred to her.

7:30.

Assuming Snape had been true to his word, he had been in the Owlery from 7:30 all the way to past 11:00. Lily could not possibly comprehend that anyone, anyone, would wait that long in the Owlery, of all places. He had three-and-a-half hours to do… essentially anything. He might have been waiting for a while, but… if he had been at the Owlery that late… could he have been sending something in secret? Something he wanted no one to find out about? As she thought about it…

7:30.

… maybe she was to blame? Giving Snape the benefit of the doubt, he had been waiting to speak to her about 'everything', and she had completely forgotten about the meeting she had decided on, the time and location he had agreed to.

Lily pushed the thoughts out of her head. No. No, it couldn't have been her. He was already friends with Avery and Mulciber and making excuses for them, he was living among the Slytherins for five years, he was the one who wouldn't 'let her' do what she wanted. He was not someone she could give the benefit of the doubt. Not anymore.

Author's Notes

Marlene McKinnon (Gryffindor)
-Date of Birth: 1 September 1959 - 31 August 1960
-Hogwarts Years:1971 - 1978
-Wand: dogwood, unicorn hair, 11 1/4"

Kingsley Shacklebolt (Gryffindor)
-Date of Birth: 1 September 1957 - 31 August 1958
-Hogwarts Years: 1969 - 1976, Prefect (1973 - 1976), Head Boy (1975 - 1976)
-Wand: black walnut, dragon heartstring, 12"

Alastor Moody (Gryffindor)
-Date of Birth: 1 September 1957 - 31 August 1958
-Hogwarts Years: 1969 - 1976
-Wand: blackthorn, dragon heartstring, 11 3/4"