Woody's Pokémon Journeys
A Paldean Christmas!
(AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is the fourth Christmas-themed episode in Woody's Pokémon Journeys.)
Narrator: Woody's goal is to collect all the Gym Badgesin Paldea in order to qualify in the Paldea League and beat Geeta, the Champion of Paldea. Geoff's goal is to complete the Pokédex and catch every kind of Pokémon, including Mew. These are the stories and adventures of these two Trainers in the world of Pokémon.
(Woody's Rotom Phone takes a picture of Woody and his friends; the picture shows their Pokémon, including Woody's Pikachu, Oinkologne (Male), Pawmo, Appletun, Koraidon, Armarouge, and Skeledirge, alongside Faith and her Floragato, Lechonk (Male), Pawmo, Ceruledge, Shelgon, and Gorebyss. Geoff also appears in the picture, alongside his Houndoom, Tarontula, Scatterbug, Finizen, Mareep, Miraidon, Capsakid, Brambleghast, Tandermaus, Litleo, Foongus, Flamigo, Bombirdier, Tropius, Smeargle, Grafaiai, Iron Bundle, Spectrier, Jynx, Calyrex, Darmanitan (Galarian Form), Werehide, Veluza, Gimmighoul, Shuppet, Timburr (Epochian Form), Nacli, Bergmite, Avalugg (Hisuian Form), Naclstack, Zapdos (Galarian Form), Sea, Horsea, and Gourgeist (Average Size), while Moose appears with his Brionne and Palafin; Bullwinkle poses with his Quaxwell, Rabsca, Cyclizar, Greavard, and Lechonk; Mordecai and his Quaxwell, alongside his Floatzel, Beautifly, Garchomp, Tyrantrum, and Sharpedo, pose with Woody; Veronica, alongside her Braxien, Smoliv, and Azumarill; and Buffy – who's with Bayleaf, Corvisquire, Lechonk (Female), Clobbopus, Spewpa, Dratini, Floragato, and Quagsire (Delta Form) – wink as the picture was taken on Woody's Rotom Phone. Drew and his Croconaw, Oinkologne (Male), Staravia, Holloweed, and Yungoos pose next to Faith and Sharon.)
(The scene changes to show the interior of Artazon Town, where Woody and his friends were spending Christmas in Paldea.)
Pinky: I love Christmas, Brain. It's the one day of the year where everyone is happy.
Brain: Yes, Pinky. I've done some research on Christmas and I realized that Christmas is a holiday that occurs not only in December, but it was also the birthday of our lord, Arceus.
Pinky: I thought it was about Jesus's birthday.
Brain: Yes, but in the Pokémon world, Arceus is our god.
Brassius: Ah, Pinky and Brain. I'm so glad you could meet to our Christmas party.
(Brain was wearing a red suit and pants, as well as a red and white-striped tie, which made it look like a candy cane. Pinky, on the other hand, wore a candy cane-striped suit and bow-tie.)
Pinky: it may be 30 degrees in Artazon Town, but it's still Christmas, right, Brain?
Brain: I suppose so.
Pinky: Oh! Eggnog, my favorite!
(Pinky takes a mouse-sized cup of eggnog and tops it off with a mountain of Cool Whip.)
Pinky: Mmm, Christmassy!
Faith: Ah, Christmas, the most magical time of year.
Sharon: [wearing a long-sleeved candy cane dress] Yup, and the first Christmas alone without your father.
Faith: I'm sure Dad's doing well in the Pokémon Marines, Mom. Hey, where's Leon?
Sharon: He's getting our Christmas tree.
Faith: We can't have Christmas without a Christmas tree, ya know.
Sharon: [laughs] Right you are, sweetpea.
Benson: There's only one way this Christmas could be special.
Thalia: Like if we ever finally receive a message from our friends and family and tell them if all right and we'll be back at Hoenn after we die?
Rocky: No, Thalia. Benson was talking about cool Christmas stories.
Mordecai and Faith: Ho, ho, hhhhoooooooo!
Benson: Well, it's normally a Halloween thing. I'm talking about us singing Christmas songs.
Yakko: Ooh, I love singing.
Wakko: Me, too!
Dot: Me, three!
Dorothy-Ann: Good idea, Benson. Singing Christmas songs will bring in the festive season.
Dot: After all, Moose A. Moose WAS the one who taught us how to sing like professionals.
Moose: That's true. I'm a pro at singing Christmas songs.
(Benson reveals handbells.)
Benson: We'll even use handbells.
Dot: Maybe it's best if we avoided the handbells for a while. Do you have a story you can tell to us, Moose?
Moose: Gladly!
Zee: This'll be good!
(Song: The Challenge of Life)
"Rise if you're prepared for the challenge
(Rise to the challenge)
Rise if you're a champion at heart
(Rise to the challenge)
Take my hand, we'll train as one
And triumph together
(Rise to the challenge)
Nothing's gonna stand in our way
Stronger and stronger we'll
Rise to the challenge of
Life
Pokémon!"
(End of The Challenge of Life)
(The scene changes to show Woody's Pikachu, Oinkologne (Male), Pawmo (Male), Koraidon, Appletun, Armarouge, Clodsire, and Skeledirge, alongside Woody himself, jumping into the air, alongside Faith and Floragato, Oinkologne (Male), Pawmo, Shelgon, Togetic, Ceruledge, and her Typhlosion (Hisuian Form). Geoff and Houndoom, alongside Finizen, Veluza, Capsakid, Bramblin, Miraidon, Flamigo, Litleo, Foongus, Tandermaus, Fuecoco, Oricorio (Pa'u Style), Nymble, Grafaiai, Smeargle, Bellossom, Skunktank, Cetoddle, Swirlix, Slurpuff, Musharna, Banscream, Iron Bundle, Calyrex, Spectrier, Jynx, Gourgeist (Average Size), Polteageist, Misdreavus (Aevian Form), Zapdos (Galarian Form), Horsea, Seel, Jellicent, Snorunt, Snowlow, and Snowrong also appear alongside Woody and Hydro, with Bullwinkle and his Quaxwell, Lechonk, Greavard, and Rabsca appearing alongside the trio.)
Faith and Mordecai: [both reading the title] "A Paldean Christmas!"
Narrator: Our heroes were throwing a Christmas party to celebrate the Winter Holidays and what better way than to celebrate with Christmas-themed stories.
Dot: What's the story called, Moose?
Moose: It's called, "Battling in a Winter Wonderland"!
(The scene shows the title card featuring Moose and his Hakamo-o, his Brionne, and his Jolteon.)
Moose: [reading the title] "Battling in a Winter Wonderland!"
(Route 10 – Pokémon Sword and Shield OST)
Woody: Oh, boy, I can't wait to head to the Ice Dimension!
(Woody was wearing a coat with snowflakes on it, while Pikachu wore a hat and a Winter coat. Mordecai, on the other hand, wore a red coat with a white collar, grey pants, and grey snowshoes. Moose wore an orange coat with a white collar, as well as a pair of white earmuffs on his ears. He also wore white gloves to keep his hands warm, and black pants to keep his legs warm.)
Lumpy: [wearing a dark blue coat, a blue Russian hat, grey pants, and white shoes] Now remember, Hoth has only 20 minutes of sunlight and we'll only stay there whenever there's sunlight because once it gets dark—
Faith: Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Cetoddle will evolve into Cetitan with help from an Ice Stone-charged magnetic field, causing other Pokémon that evolve with Ice Stones to evolve. Lumpy, you told this like 20 times already.
Lumpy: I'm just making sure you guys heard what I said.
Lily: Yeah, if we stay in Hoth for too long, the Cetitan will eat our brains!
Lumpy: I think you've been playing too many zombie video games, Lily.
Lily: Sorry, Uncle Lumpy. I just hate brain-eating Pokémon.
Lumpy: It's all right.
(The Flying Taxi, which had four Squawkabilly flying, headed to the Land of Hoth. Upon arriving there, Woody encounters some Swellow flying.)
Woody: Those are Swellow!
Arven: Never seen a flock of Swellow before. {pulls out his Rotom Phone}
[Arven's Rotom Phone chimes]
Arven's Rotom Phone: "Swellow, the Swallow Pokémon. A Normal and Flying type. Swellow dives through the sky at a steep angle, capturing prey with its talons. It flies above people's heads and can make beautiful pictures in the sky."
Mordecai: I guess they must be flying South for the Winter.
Swellow: Swellow!
(The Swellow flock gathers in a V formation.)
Woody: Have fun, Swellow!
(Arven puts his Rotom Phone back in his pocket.)
Arven: We're here, the Land of Hoth!
Faith: I'm so glad we're gonna see snow for Christmas. We haven't seen snow since that blizzard back in December 2018.
Mordecai: yeah! Snow is what makes Christmas "Christmas".
Faith: That and presents. I need Minecraft for the Nintendo Switch.
Everyone: White Christmas! White Christmas! White Christmas!
Lumpy: All right, we're going to the Land of Hoth.
Faith: Mordecai, do you like my new snow gear?
(Faith's snow gear consisted of a purple coat underneath a long-sleeved dress, red and white-striped leggings, and a pair of white fur-covered boots. She also wore a pair of white Alolan Vulpix earmuffs, making her look like an Alolan Vulpix.)
Mordecai: You look as beautiful as an Alolan Vulpix.
Faith: Oh, thanks, Mordykins.
(The Flying Taxi lands in the snow, which was dark and windy.)
Benson: 20 minutes, everyone! Starting… now!
(The stopwatch clicks as the sunlight appears, making it look like a winter wonderland.)
Faith: Yay! 20-minute snow day!
Lana: Faith, look. I made a snow fort.
Faith: That's nice, Lana.
(Brionne makes a snow version of itself. She sees some faces in the snow, which were revealed to be Pinky and the Brain.)
Brain: [wearing a fur parka and pants] Greetings!
Pinky: [laughs] What am I doing here?
Lana: Look! Some Pokémon are approaching the fort.
(Five Cetoddle and a pair of Alolan Vulpix appear.)
Cetoddle: Merry Christmas!
Woody: Aww, so sweet.
Mordecai: Are those Cetoddle? I've never seen such adorable Pokémon before.
(Mordecai pulls out his blue Rotom Phone and points it directly at the 5 Cetoddle.)
Mordecai's Rotom Phone: "Cetoddle, the Terra Whale Pokémon. An Ice type. Cetoddle used to live in oceans, but it migrated to icy tundras, allowing it to fully live on land. People thought that Cetoddle was a relative to Wailmer, but unlike Wailmer, it lived in the snow."
Benson: Let's get a white Christmas move on, guys. Hey, is that an Alolan Vulpix?
Faith: Sure looks like it. [pulls out her Rotom Phone]
[Faith's Rotom Phone chimes]
Faith's Rotom Phone: "Vulpix, Alolan Form. The Fox Pokémon. An Ice type. Vulpix releases air that drops down to -58 degrees Fahrenheit, and can cool itself down using ice shards. Its appearance was said to have changed due to it living on snow-covered mountains for a long period of time."
Vulpix: [Alolan Form] Vul! Vul!
Faith: Looks like those Vulpix want to play.
Cetoddle: [asking if they want to play in the snow] Cetodd?
Faith: Sure. You guys can play, too.
(There was a montage of everyone in the Land of Hoth. Lana kisses a male Cetoddle with mistletoe, then squeals with excitement. Kiawe eats cookies that another Cetoddle baked while Faith, Drew, Rocky, Bullwinkle, Thalia, Thalia's Mienfoo, and Mordecai go sledding. Everybody opens gifts. Faith got a pair of noise-cancelling headphones and a Switch version of the two Subnautica video games, Bullwinkle gets a large-sized candy cane and new Winter gloves, Mordecai gets a dessert baking kit, and Thalia gets a bag of chestnuts and a Nuzleafcracker. Lumpy is seen pretending to be a Galarian Darumaka and the other Cetoddle cuddle with Lumpy. When they had a minute left, Benson acceptsaice crystal-covered Mega Charm from Cetoddle and his friends.)
Benson: Now that was fun. Let's head back to Sada's lab, everyone.
Faith: Wait, I haven't done skiing yet!
(Faith was seen wearing ski goggles and skis over her boots.)
Benson: We don't have much time left, Faith. Also, you can't ski due to your lack of vision. But Geoff DID capture you an Alolan Vulpix before you went skiing.
Geoff: Sure did!
(Geoff holds up an Icicle Ball, and inside the ball was an Alolan Vulpix.)
Faith: Here I go! [skis down the slope]: WHHHHEEEEEE!
Benson: Faith, you're gonna get hurt.
(Faith loses grip of her skis, causing her to twist her arm.)
Benson: Faith, why the hell would you ski?! You're blind for God's sake!
Sharon: My poor baby! Are you okay?
Faith: Ow, my arm!
Sharon: And this is why my father and I won't let you join the Winter Olympics.
(Sharon puts some first-aid bandages on Faith's right arm.)
Benson: Hurry, back to the jet!
Faith: Ow!
(The effect of the icy field affected the Cetoddle in the field, causing them to evolve into Cetitan!)
Cetitan: Cetttiitttaaannn!
Cetitan #2: RAAWWWGGHHH! We're gonna eat you!
Benson: Back to the jet, back to the jet!
Faith: Are those… Cetitan? [pulls out her pink Rotom Phone]
Faith's Rotom Phone: "Cetitan, the Tera Whale Pokémon. An Ice type, and the evolved form of Cetoddle. Cetitan has a horn on its forehead, which allows it to gather energy. When that happens, the area around it will freeze."
Faith: Run!
Cetitan: [Ice Beam attacks] Ceettttiiaaaannn!
Zee: [carries Faith on her head] We gotta get out of here before we become dinner for these icy whales!
Moose: Jolteon, I choose you!
[Poké Ball opens up]
Jolteon: Jolteon!
Moose: Jolteon, use Thunderbolt to stop those Cetitan!
Jolteon: [Thunderbolt attack] Jollltteeeoooonnnn!
[Electricity crackling from spikes]
Cetitan: [screaming in pain] RRAAWWWWGGHHH!
Faith: It's not working! What do we do?
Benson: Use your presents as weapons!
Pinky: What should we do, cause an avalanche?
Brain: No, Pinky. We need to use our gifts as weapons!
Pinky: But I don't want to get rid of my Sara Lee cheesecake. Narf!
Brain: DO IT OR I'LL HAVE TO KILL YOU!
Pinky: Fine. [throws the cheesecake at Cetitan]: Forgive me, Mr. Cheesecake.
(The cheesecake was thrown at Cetitan, which ate the cheesecake.)
Cetitan: [eating the cheesecake]
(Mordecai throws his dessert baking kit.)
Faith: Mordecai! I worked so hard at Professor Safa's lab to afford that Easy-Bake dessert baking kit!
(Thalia throws her chestnuts and Nuzleaf-likenutcracker at the Cetitans.)
Rocky: Thalia! Those nuts were for you and me! And as for that Nuzleafcracker, Faith had to carve it at her high school wood carving class!
Faith: Yeah, and it costed me a fortune!
Mordecai: I know! And I know how much you love me, Faith, but Christmas isn't about gifts.
Faith: Then what's Christmas about?
Mordecai: It's about… spending time with the ones you know and love, especially your own families!
(All of a sudden, a white glow appeared! It was Bullwinkle's Wyrdeer!)
Faith: It's Bullwinkle's Wyrdeer, the same one he left in Hoenn!
Wyrdeer: [speaking telepathically] That's right. It is I, Wyrdeer! And I'm here to help you guys defeat these Cetitan. Taste my Psyshield Bash, you Bastiodons!
(Battle! Wild Pokémon – Pokémon Anime OST)
Drew: I've never seen a Wyrdeer before. [pulls out his green Rotom Phone]
[Drew's Rotom Phone chimes]
Drew's Rotom Phone: "Wyrdeer, the Big Horn Pokémon. A Normal and Psychic type. Wyrdeer is a Pokémon that was said to be worshipped by the people in Hisui during ancient times. By using the orbs on the both of its antlers, it can distort space and time, creating barriers that can protect it from attacks."
Faith: Go, Wyrdeer!
(Wyrdeer used Psyshield Bash to ram into the wild Cetitan, then uses Hyper Beam from its antlers to make them explode.)
Faith: Cool, Wyrdeer learned Hyper Beam back in Hoenn!
Wyrdeer: "You'redarn right I did."
Wakko: Great job, Wyrdeer.
Wyrdeer: "Who might you three be?"
Yakko and Wakko: We're the Warner Brothers!
Dot: And the Warner Sister!
Wyrdeer: "And who are these two mice? Are they Pokémon Trainers?"
Brain: Actually, we're genetically-altered lab mice planning to take over Paldea, but we're taking a break from taking over the world for the Christmas holidays.
Pinky: Narf! I'm Pinky.
Brain: And this is Pinky.
Pinky: Charmed to meet you, Mr. Wyrdeer. Zort!
(The scene changes to show Sada's jet flying out of the Land of Hoth.)
Yakko: I'm so glad I didn't even sacrifice my sugar cookies.
Yakko, Wakko, and Dot: This was the best Christmas ever!
[Sugar cookies exploding]
(End of "Battling in a Winter Wonderland!")
Lumpy: The end!
Pinky: Bravo, bravo! That was an action-packed story.
Benson: Look, if you guys want to tell Christmas stories, they should be winter-themed stories, like this one. I call it, "The 12 Battles of Christmas!"
(The scene changes to show Yakko with his Cobalion and Dewott.)
Yakko: [reading the title] "The 12 Battles of Christmas!"
(The scene changes to show Yakko narrating.)
Yakko: [as a narrator] "It all started when Sada took us on a trip to a holiday light show in Freezington Town, a town in the Crown Tundra. We decided to fly to the town, and we were able to land at Freezington after looking at the lights."
Lana: Merry Christmas, Moose and Zee.
Zee: Thanks, Lana. [opens her present]: Cool! Is that an armor cannon, like the one Armarouge has?
Lana: Sure is. It can launch all sorts of things, even desserts.
Zee: Cool, with this thing, I can do those cool one-liners from action-packed movies. [as Arnold Schwarzenegger]: Hasta la vista, baby. [normal voice]: Oh, good one!
Lana: And here's your present, Moose.
(Moose unwraps his Christmas present. Inside the present was a Mega Ring and an Ampharosite.)
Moose: Whoa, a new Mega Ring and an Ampharosite once my Mareep fully evolves into an Ampharos.
Yakko: [story] Ow!
Zee: Sorry, I was testing my new armor cannon out.
Faith: I love Christmas.
Mordecai: Me, too, but you know what would make this Christmas season a whole lot better?
Faith: What?
Mordecai: Real snow!
Faith: But we're in Paldea. The only place that snows in Paldea is at the top of Glaseado Mountain.
Mordecai: I can dream, can't I?
Faith: Pretty much. My Christmas wish is for snow.
(Meanwhile, a guitarist from the band Koffing and the Toxics was walking through the snow, alongside his partner, an Electabuzz.)
Billy Jo: Oh, man. No carolers allowed? Electabuzz, if we want to spread some holiday spirit, we need to sing.
Electabuzz: Electa!
(Billy and his Electabuzz walked through the snow. They eventually see Sada's jet and walk inside of it.)
Billy: Must be the place.
Yakko: [opens the door] Hello?
Billy: Hello, I'm one of the singers from the Unovan band, Koffing and the Toxics.
Yakko: I'm your biggest fan. Would you sing my autograph book, please?
Billy: Um, sure.
(Billy takes out a pen and signs his name in Yakko's autograph book.)
Yakko: Thanks. Who's that with you?
Billy: That's my Electabuzz.
Yakko: Electabuzz, huh? Let's see what Rotom says about Electabuzz. [pulls out his Rotom Phone]
[Yakko's Rotom Phone chimes]
Yakko's Rotom Phone: "Electabuzz, the Electric Pokémon. An Electric type. Electricity forms from Electabuzz's body, which can be used during battles. Before attacking, it charges its body with electricity, allowing it to unleash a powerful punch."
Billy Jo: May we sing a song?
Yakko: Uuuuuuhhhhh… sure!
(Billy Jo gets out an electric guitar.)
Billy Jo: Electabuzz, use Thunderbolt to amplify this electric guitar!
Electabuzz: [Thunderbolts Billy's guitar] Electa!
(Billy Jo's Electabuzz-powered electric guitar strummed with force.)
Billy Jo: On the first day of Christmas, a Trainer sent to me,
A Farfetch'd with Fly and Agility!
Farfetch'd: [leaps from a pear tree] Farfetch'd!
Faith: Ooh, a Farfetch'd!
Drew: What's a Farfetch'd? [pulls out his Rotom Phone]
[Drew's Rotom Phone chimes]
Drew's Rotom Phone: "Farfetch'd, the Wild Duck Pokémon. A Normal and Flying type. Farfetch'd uses a spring onion as a weapon during battle. In desperate times, it can oftentimes use this sword-like leek as food for it to eat."
Geoff: I haven't seen this Pokémon since we moved to Paldea.
Farfetch'd: [Fly attack] Farr!
Geoff: Hey! I was only trying to capture you!
Yakko: Geoff, you okay?
Geoff: [dizzy] I'm fine. No more martinis for me, thanks. I'm letting you drive.
(Geoff falls down.)
Mordecai: Geoff! What did you do to my cousin?
Farfetch'd: [pecking at Mordecai] Farfarfarfarfar!
Mordecai: OW! OW! OW! OUCH!
Billy Jo: WAAAAAHHH! On the second day of Christmas, a Trainer sent to me: two Pidove and a Farfetch'd with Fly and Agility!
(A pair of Pidove angrily attack Moose and Zee.)
Zee: [screams in pain] AAAAAAHHHH! I got pecked by a pair of Pidove! Why does this keep happening to me?!
(The same Farfetch'd from before reappears and uses Agility to slam into Woody.)
Woody: Pikachu, Thunderbolt this Farfetch'd!
Pikachu: [Thunderbolt attack] Piikkaa…cccchhhuuu!
{Farfetch'd screams in pain}
Yakko: Stand back, sibs! This could get dangerous.
(Wakko and Dot head up to the upstairs bedroom.)
Mordecai: Thanks for the show, but—
(Mordecai gets kicked by Electabuzz.)
Faith: You okay, Mordecai?
Mordecai: No! I'm not okay!
Billy Jo: On the third day of Christmas, a Trainer gave to me: three Combusken, two Pidove, and a Farfetch'd with Fly and Agility!
(Three Combusken, two Pidove, and a Farfetch'd appear and they attack Pinky and the Brain.)
Pinky: What's going on?
Brain: We're being mauled by Flying-type Pokémon!
Pinky: I don't like the sound of those birds.
Brain: Pinky, you idiot! Birds eat mice, which means they're trying to eat us.
Pinky: I don't wanna die! I've never got a girlfriend that's the same species as I am!
Brain: Pinky, calm down. As long as our cage isn't damaged, we'll be all right.
(Farfetch'd damages the cage using both Fly and Agility, which explodes with force.)
Pinky: I guess I spoke too soon, Brain! RUNNN!
Billy Jo: On the fourth day of Christmas, a Trainer gave to me: four Murkrow, three Combusken, two Pidove, and a Farfetcj'd with Fly and Agility!"
(All the bird-like Pokémon attack everybody, including Pinky and the Brain.)
Brain: Why does this song have so many bird-like Pokémon!?
Pinky: Here comes the next verse.
Brain: Oh, shit!
Billy Joe: On the fifth day of Christmas, a Trainer sent to me: five Mega Ringssss!
Yakko: Cobalion, use Double Kick to kick this guitarist in the head!
Cobalion: [Double Kick attack] Coballii!
(Billy punches Cobalion in the stomach using his Mega Rings.)
Woody: Oh no, here comes the next verse.
(7 verses later…)
(The scene changes to show 12 Rillaboom drumming, 11 Nuzleaf piping, 10 Blaziken a-leaping, 9 Oricorio dancing, 8 milking maids, 7 Swannas, and 6 Fearows.)
Brain: Pinky, this is outrageous! There's too many verses in the 12 Days of Christmas!
Pinky: What?
Brain: Billy Jo wanted to sing to us, but what makes a caroler go away? Any ideas, Mordecai?
Mordecai: Cookies! My mom always gave cookies to carolers and they'd go away.
Brain: That's it! Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but if we get too much cookies for Billy Jo to eat, wouldn't he get a heart attack?
Brain: No, Pinky. We need cookies so Billy would go away! Yakko, Wakko, Dot, Faith, Drew, Sharon, Leon! Everybody! We! Need! Cookies!
Pinky: Good idea!
(Leon gets out his secret cookie stash from his bedroom closet while Faith gets out OREO cookies from her stocking, and as for the Warners, they got their cookies from Wakko's Munchlax who was about to eat them.)
Wakko: Hey! Those cookies are for Billy, not you.
Munchlax: Munch?
Yakko: Oh, all right. You can have these macadamia nut cookies. I hate nuts in cookies. [blows a kiss to the audience]: Goodnight, everybody!
Dot: Now's not the time for jokes, Yakko. We need cookies!
Yakko: Sorry, force of habit.
(Mordecai puts the sack of cookies on his back.)
Mordecai: Santa's not the only one eating cookies tonight, but we're all out of milk, so these babies are going down dry.
(Faith puts her cookies in Zee's armor cannon.)
Zee: This is for the greater good.
(Faith drops a Linking Cord from an unwrapped present, which was soon connected to a charger cord.)
Faith: Uh oh.
(The Electabuzz that Billy has evolved, transforming into an Electivire.)
Electivire: Elleccttiiii!
(Battle! Regice, Registeel, and Regirock! – Pokémon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire OST)
Brain: it's Electivire, the final evolution of Elekid!
Pinky: Electivire? [pulls out his Rotom Phone]
[Pinky's Rotom Phone chimes]
Pinky's Rotom Phone: "Electivire, the Thunderbolt Pokémon. An Electric type, and Elekid's final evolved form. Electivire discharges electricity from its two tails, creating a powerful amount of electricity. It can beat up opponents using the power of its electricity-filled fists."
Pinky: It beats up opponents using the power of its electricity-filled fists?!
(Electricity courses from Electivire's body.)
Electivire: [angered] Electiii!
Moose: [sends out his Mareep] Help me out, Mareep!
[Poké Ball opens up]
Mareep: Mareeee!
Moose: Mareep, see if you can use Thunderbolt to absorb the electricity in your wool.
Mareep: Reep! [links its tail using Thundershock] REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!
Moose: Um, Mareep, you okay, bud?
(Mareep begins to evolve!)
Faith: What's happening to Mareep?
(With success, the parts of Mareep's fleece fell off and itsskin became as bouncy as rubber. In the process, it became a Flaaffy.)
Flaaffy: Flaaffyyyyyy!
Moose: My little Mareep evolved into a strong Flaaffy!
Flaaffy: [uses Electro Ball] Fllaaaaaaaaa!
(Electivire, even thought it was a pure Electric-type, was electrocuted by Flaaffy and its newly-learnt Electro Ball.. With force, the cookies were sent into the Trainer and Electivire's mouths.)
Billy Jo: Thanks for the cookies.
Moose: No problem.
Woody: Flaaffy evolved! I wonder what it does. [pulls out his Rotom Phone]
[Woody's Rotom Phone chimes]
Woody's Rotom Phone: "Flaaffy, the Wool Pokémon. An Electric type. Flaaffy stores electricity in its rubber-like skin. If it stores too much electricity in its skin, its fleece would fall off."
(All of a sudden, snow began to fall.)
Woody: Look, it's snowing in Artazon Town!
Pikachu: [admires the snow] Ccccchhhaaa!
Faith: You did say you wanted snow, Mordecai.
(End of "The 12 Battles of Christmas")
Wakko: That was a fun story and all, but I wanted a story with lots of action in it.
Yakko: Me, too.
Dot: Me, three.
Mordecai: Can I tell a story this time?
Faith: Go ahead, Mordecai.
Mordecai: [clears throat] Here's a story that'll make you smile. It's called, "A Present for Moose!"
(The scene changes to show Mordecai with his Sharpedo, Garchomp, and Quaxwell.)
Mordecai: [reading the title] "A Present for Moose!"
(The scene changes to show Benson dressed as Santa Claus.)
Benson: Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas!
Faith: Yay, Santa's here on Christmas Eve!
Benson: Yes, sire, and I got presents for each of you.
Mordecai: Faith, aren't you a little too old for believing in Santa?
Faith: Yes, yes I am.
Mordecai: Well, it's good that you still believe in a figment of your imagination.
Faith: What?
Mordecai: It means you still believe in someone who only exists in your mind.
(Wonderland of Snow – SpongeBob OST)
Benson: Here's one for Yakko, one for Wakko, and fourteen presents for Dot since she's cute.
Wakko: Why do you get all the presents, Dot?
Dot: I can't help it if I'm cute.
Benson: Let's not forget about Lumpy and Lily Winn.
Lily: Lucario, look. I got a present!
Lucario: [holds up a bow-covered dog bone] Lucari!
Benson: Here's one for Lana, one for Kiawe, and last but not least: presents for Pinky and the Brain.
(Benson gives Pinky and the Brain a handful of presents.)
Pinky: Look, Brain! I got a cheese wheel.
Brain: [opens up one of his presents, which turns out to be a handful of coal] Well, at least this box of coal will be enough to last us for the Winter.
(Brain puts some of his coal in the fireplace and Pinky looks at the big-headed mouse.)
Brain: What? It was cold in the cage.
Moose: Where's my present?
Zee: Yeah, where's Moose's present?
Benson: Mordecai, Faith, can I talk to you guys for a second?
Faith: Sure!
(Benson is seen yelling at Mordecai and Faith.)
Benson: You were supposed to get a present for Moose! I even handed you a packet of what Moose's present is: what he wants, where to get it, how much it was, who to talk to.
Faith: You weren't being specific.
Benson: You were supposed to get Moose a new laptop and a flash drive!
Faith: Ooooohhhhh…! Yeah, I was confused.
Benson: It's okay, Faith. Just try to get the flash drive and lap-top for Moose.
Mordecai: But it's Christmas Eve! All the malls in Paldea will be closed at 6 pm tonight. It's already 11:00 AM.
Benson: Luckily, I found a mall in Unova. It's called Shopping Mall Nine. You can get there by using Faith's PokéTeleporter.
Faith: Great idea! Next stop, Shopping Mall Nine!
(Faith activates her PokéTransporter, sending her and Mordecai to Shopping Mall Nine.)
Faith: This must be the place.
Mordecai: Faith, can you explain to me why you're wearing a coat and scarf inside the mall?
Faith: I get cold easily.
Mordecai: Oh. Um… okay.
(Mordecai, wearing a coat underneath his white shirt, walks up with Faith.)
?: Greetings, travelers.
Mordecai: Arceus, is that you?
Arceus: Welcome to the Shopping Mall Nine.
Faith: Hi. My ex-boyfriend Mordecai and I would like to buy a laptop and a flashdrive for Moose.
Arceus: I even took care of the jet plane you were flying. Parked it in the airplane parking lot.
Mordecai: Oh, thanks.
Arceus: Is this a mall?
Arceus: You could say it's a mall. Theoretically.
Mordecai: I'm also looking for a Christmas gift for my wife, C.J.
Arceus: You've come to the right place. However, you must return to Paldea by 6 pm because if you stare here, you'll live here forever. Follow me,guys.
Faith: Where are we going?
Arceus: We're going to the fifth floor of the mall or should I say… the fifth dimension?
(The Tidal Zone theme – SpongeBob OST)
Faith: This is getting creepy.
(Mordecai and Faith enter the mall's elevator and Arceus presses the fifth button to the fifth floor.)
Faith: Here we go!
(The door opens up and Faith and Mordecai were revealed to be straight lines.)
Faith: Mordecai, look! You've turned into a 2D character!
Mordecai: You've turned into a 2D character, too!
Faith: Oh my Arceus, I'm a 2D character!
(The door closes.)
Faith: [changes back into her normal self] What… was that?
Arceus: The doors change you into different versions of yourselves.
Faith: Oh, thanks.
(Mordecai and Faith arrive to the second floor.)
Faith: Phew! At least we're not 2D anymore.
Mordecai: Um, Faith? Why do I feel a draft going on?
Faith: "Feel a draft"? What are you talking about, Morde-
(Faith looks down and sees her private parts exposed.)
Faith: [screams at the top of her lungs] WHERE THE HECK ARE MY CLOTHES?!
(Faith's clothes disappear.)
Faith: Hey, come back, clothes!
(People watched Faith in the nude.)
Faith: What are you looking at?! Look at me, I'm naked!
(Mordecai was shown naked. His penis was exposed.)
Mordecai: [screams like a girl] What the hell?!
Arceus: The second dimension allows you to experience life without clothes on.
Faith: This is turning into an Adult Swim fanfiction over here! Put us back in our clothes!
Arceus: How come?
Faith: I'm not comfortable being naked! Well, I'm okay with being naked in the shower, but not in public!
Cashier: Hey, put some clothes on! This is a public mall!
Mordecai: And why do I have a penis?
Faith: Males have penises, even birds.
Mordecai: [covers his penis with a towel] Take us to the next floor! I can't take the nudity anymore!
(Mordecai and Faith arrive at the fourth floor.)
Mordecai: Phew! I'm glad I'm not naked anymore.
Faith: You said it, Mordecai. I'm glad my clothes came back on.
(Mordecai looks up at Faith and sees her in a magenta two-piece swim dress.)
Mordecai: Nice swimsuit, Faith.
Faith: Thanks. I got it as an early birthday present almost a year ago. To be honest, those orange floral swim shorts look good on you.
Mordecai: [in his orange floral swim shorts] Hey, why is the whole mall under the sea?
Arceus: This is the Subnautica Dimension. It's based on the worldwide video game everyone plays all the time.
Mordecai: Is that why we're wearing scuba gear?
Arceus: I'm sure of it!
Faith: Can we get out of it? This weird-looking Magikarp wants me to be my girlfriend.
Arceus: Sure! Next stop, the Fifth Dimension!
(The scene changes to show the fifth dimension of Shopping Mall Nine. Mordecai and Faith, wearing their normal clothes, got out of the elevator.)
Mordecai: Wanna get an OREO sundae after this?
Faith: Sure!
(Suddenly, another Faith and Mordecai walk out of their original selves and leave.)
Faith: Umm, what just happened?
Arceus: In the fifth dimension, you can see all possible paths, even the ones you don't have to choose.
Faith: That sounds awesome sauce!
Arceus: However, the longer you stay, the more complicated things will be.
Mordecai: Come on. Let's get the flash drive and laptop and get the heck out of here.
(Mordecai and Faith arrive at two escalators.)
Faith: Should we go up or down?
Mordecai: Up seems fine!
(Two Faith and Mordecais go up the escalator.)
Faith: Ooh, video games!
(Before Faith can head to Gamestop, Mordecai grabs her right shoulder so she couldn't enter. A theoretical Faith continues running into Gamestop.)
Mordecai: No more distractions. Just think- laptop and flash drive.
(Both Faith and Mordecai say laptop and flash drive as they leave Gamestop. He scene cuts to the two walking by Starbucks. Another theoretical version of Faith and Mordecai walk by a medieval store called Armor, Weapons, and Beyond. Once again, the theoretical Mordecai and Faith head into the store, leaving the duo's bodies. Faith and Mordecai run as two other Faith and Mordecais trying on formal clothes – Mordecai was in a tuxedo and Faith was in a dress with straps. As they go down the escalator, a group of Faith and Mordecais are on an escalator going up. As the real Mordecai and Faith arrive back down, they see a Trainer and an Arcanine walking by them, scaring the duo. The fifth floor approaches the duo, but the duo see the theoretical Mordecai and Faith trying on different swimsuits – the theory-like Faith in a bikini top and skirt and the theory-like Mordecai in a swimsuit tank-top and orange floral swim shorts. The scene cuts to Mordecai and Faith looking at a laptop store filled with laptops and flash drives.)
Mordecai: Finally.
Faith: Look, it's the laptop store.
Mordecai: Good eyes, Faith. Now that we're at the store, we can buy Moose a flash drive and a computer of his own.
Faith: Let's get out of here!
Mall Announcer: Attention, all customers. The store is now closing and will soon by imploding. Merry Christmas.
Faith: We gotta get out of here! And I know just the Pokémon to help us out! [sends out her Hisuian Arcanine]: Perry, I need you!
[Poké Ball opens up]
Perry: [Hisuian Arcanine] Arcani!
Faith: Perry, use Extreme Speed to help us out of the mall!
(Perry the Hisuian Arcanine surrounds itself in an white aura, charging out of the mall.)
Mordecai: Hurry! We're not gonna make it out in time!
(Perry uses Extreme Speed one more and the duo came out of Shopping Mall Nine right before it imploded.)
Mordecai: Phew! We're safe.
Faith: Now to find a present for Geoff.
Bouffalant: [approaches Faith] Bouff!
Faith: What's this? [pulls out her Rotom Phone]
[Faith's Rotom Phone chimes]
Faith's Rotom Phone: "Bouffalant, the Bash Buffalo Pokémon. A Normal type. Bouffalant can crush a car using only one single headbutt. It can widely charge using its strong body, headbutting anything it sees."
Faith: Cool, I should catch this for Geoff!
(Faith catches the wild Bouffalant.)
Faith's Rotom Phone: [chimes] Congratulations! Bouffalant has been registered to your Pokédex!
(The next morning…)
Moose: [opens his present] Wow, a new computer!
Faith: We also got you a flash drive, Moose. My ex-boyfriend Mordecai knew a flash drive would be perfect for your files.
Moose: Stupendous! Now I can work on my novels for .
Flaaffy: [nuzzles with Moose] Flaa!
Moose: You got me a gift, to, Flaaffy?
Flaaffy: [nods its head]
(Moose opens up the gift that his Flaaffy got for him. It was a picture of Flaaffy when it was a Mareep, Jolteon, Hakamo-o, and Brionne.)
Moose: A picture of the five of us when we started our journey in Paldea? Flaaffy, you should've have!
(End of "A Present for Moose.")
Faith: And the Shopping Mall Nine was never seen again.
The end!
[Slow clapping approaches]
Benson: Well, well, well. So, you guys want to treat Christmas like it's Halloween, huh?
Faith: [slow claps with Benson] And it was all worth it.
Benson: Faith, your sister Daruka is calling you.
Faith: [pulls out her Rotom Phone] Hello?
(Daruka was on a FaceTime call with Faith. She wore a long-sleeved prison jumpsuit-like dress and had her Mega Stone necklace on her neck.)
Daruka: Faith Miller. We meet again, eh?
Faith: Happy Holidays, Daruka!
Daruka: What is it with people celebrating Christmas?
Faith: I don't know, maybe they like it?
Daruka: You take that back, you bastard! Christmas is nothing but a holiday full of commercialism.
Faith: What's that?
Daruka: It's basically the process of something being up in profit, like Christmas for instance.
Faith: What do you want from me?
Daruka: I've got a Halloween-like Christmas story that'll made you have nightmares for months. This is called, "Cat Got Your Lickitung?"
(The title card shows Daruka with Milotic (Delta Form), Darmanitan (Delta Form), and Spectreon.)
Daruka: [reads the title] "Cat Got Your Lickitung?"
(The scene changes to show Faith and hermom, Sharon baking cookies.)
Faith: Man, it sure was nice of Mr. Salvatore to let me bake for his languages class.
Sharon: It sure was.
Faith: I'm glad I get to wear my purple apron again.
(Faith wore her usual red Christmas dress, but with a purple apron over it.)
Mordecai: Hi, Faith. What'cha making?
Faith: I'm making snickerdoodles for Mr. Salvatore, my languages-speaking teacher.
Mordecai: Mm, mmm, mmm, that sounds tasty!
Faith: It sure is. After the cookies cool off from baking, my mom and I will frost 'em.
Mordecai: Can I help bake them?
Faith: Sure. Just make sure you save some of the cinnamon batter for me to taste.
Mordecai: You got it!
(While Faith, Sharon, and Mordecai were baking, a human-like Pokémon saw them bake.)
?: Lickitung?
(The Pokémon walked inside the house, waiting to eat.)
Mordecai: Now this recipe says we need to add 2 sticks of butter for the frosting and one stick of butter for the cookies themselves.
(Faith puts in two sticks of butter into the snickerdoodles' frosting and one stick of butter in a separate mixing bowl. She then puts in sugar, cinnamon oil, and cinnamon into the cookies, then mixes the bowl. The Pokémon used its tongue to lick the batter.)
Lickitung: [licks its tongue with delight] Lick!
(1 hour later…)
Faith: Now that the cookies have been baked and cooled, we can frost 'em!
(Faith grabs ahold of a butter knife and puts cinnamon-infused frosting on the cookie. Mordecai accidentally grabs Lickitung's tongue instead of a butter knife.)
Mordecai: [screams]
Lickitung: [screams with Mordecai]
Sharon: What's with all the screaming?
(Lickitung feels sad.)
Lickitung: [sad] Lick.
Sharon: What kind of Pokémon is that?
Faith: It looks like a Lickitung.
Sharon: Lickitung? [pulls out her blue Rotom Phone]
[Sharon's Rotom Phone chimes]
Sharon's Rotom Phone: "Lickitung, the Licking Pokémon. A Normal type. Lickitung can lick anything using its tongue. Whenever it sees something it's never tried before, it will lick it, no matter how rancid it is."
Sharon: So you're the one who tried my snickerdoodles. I'm glad you like them.
Lickitung: Lick!
Mordecai: Would you like to taste-test my girlfriend's frosting?
(Lickitung tastes the frosting and sparkles come from its eyes. It slurps its tongue in delight.)
Sharon: You like it?
Lickitung: [nods in agreement] Tung, tung!
Brain: Hmm, this Lickitung seems like a glutton. Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but if Lickitung ate spicy peppers, wouldn't he have stomach troubles?
Brain: Technically so if the food wasn't washed.
Pinky: What do we do with Lickitung?
Brain: We'll stuff him with food of all kinds!
Pinky: Great idea! Maybe Lickitung will join Ms. Miller's team. Troz!
Sharon: Hope you two saved room for dessert. I made Sausage Curry. I even put gravy on the curry for Lickitung.
Brain: [clears his throat] Excuse me, Ms. Miller. Can we borrow Lickitung after dinner?
Sharon: Yes, of course.
(After dinner, Brain borrowed Lickitung from Sharon.)
Mordecai: Hey, where'd Lickitung go?
Lickitung: [crying for help] Liccckkiii!
Faith: That sounds like Lickitung!
(Faith and Mordecai run into the basement where Lickitung was in a chair, eating food. Its stomach grew larger in size.)
Faith: Lickitung, what are you doing?
Brain: We're trying to make Lickitung the new partner of Sharon Miller.
Faith: Yes, but he's overeating! That's not good for his digestive system.
(Brain falls into a howl of cinnamon, which he used to coat the snickerdoodles on.)
Brain: Pinky, heeelllppp! I'm stuck in this bowl of cinnamon!
Pinky: Uhh, Brain?
Brain: What is it, Pinky?
Pinky: LICKITUNG'S ABOUT TO EAT YOU!
Brain: Huh?
(Brain gets eaten up by Lickitung. He was now inside of the Licking Pokémon.)
Brain: Eww, now I know what it feels like to be processed cheese. How do I get out of here?
(Brain sees Lickitung's stomach.)
Brain: Ewwww! But I'll do it to see Pinky again.
(2 hours later…)
Brain: Hey, Pinky.
Pinky: [sniffs Brain] Ewww!
(Brain was shown to be extremely dirty and was covered from head to toe in discharge.)
Pinky: Brain, why do you smell like someone having sex?
Brain: I don't want to talk about it. Oh, well, at least Lickitung is happy to be with Sharon. Now, come. I need to take a bath.
(Brain takes off his clothes, revealing his private parts.)
Pinky: What are we going to do in the New Year?
Brain: The same thing we do every year, Pinky: try to take over the world!
Chorus: They're dinky, they're Pinky and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain!
(Meanwhile…)
Sharon: I'm so glad you're safe, Lickitung.
Lickitung: [hugs Sharon with a sloppy kiss] Lick!
Sharon: How would you like to be my new partner?
Lickitung: [nods in agreement] Lick!
(Sharon throws a Poké Ball at Lickitung, capturing the Licking Pokémon.)
Sharon's Rotom Phone: [chimes] Lickitung has been registered to your Pokédex!
Sharon: Yes, Lickitung is all mine!
Doliv: [cheering] Doliv!
(The scene changes to show Daruka.)
Daruka: The end!
Pinky: I liked the part where we fattened up Lickitung.
Brain: That was my favorite part, too.
Yakko: You're got so much Christmas spirit, Mr. Benson.
Benson: [blushes] Thanks, Yakko.
Yakko, Wakko, and Dot: [to the screen] Merry Christmas, everyone!
THE END!
Another Christmas episode complete!
(December 4th, 2023): Well, it's almost time for the second Christmas special, "Panic at the Ice Dimension!" where Mordecai, Faith, Mordecai, Yakko, Wakko, and Dot try to save Christmas from Daruka, my arch-rival. I'll be taking a place after "Sleeping with the Pokémon?" an episode that markes Cynthia's debut in Pokémon the Series: Scarlet and Violet – Untold Journeys.
I'll see you guys in a bit!