Author's Note: Hey everybody! I did finish this chapter yesterday, but being on my laptop in the car driving home from another state in the middle of the night, was just not working for posting. So, now that I am home from work, here it is! Thank you to everyone new that is following and giving kudos! And a huge thank you to all those who have been sticking with me for so long!
"Nothing makes sense…"
"Why's that?" Hawke asked Varric's brother, only halfway curious to hear the answer.
"We are well beneath the Deep Roads. Whatever dwarves lived here they came long before the first blight. But where are the statues of Paragons? I don't recognize any of the markings on the walls, or the rubble. Which means, these dwarves…. must have been unique."
"Then whatever we find will be very rare and valuable," Hawke replied with a grin.
"Hmph," Bartrand grunted, frowning. "Possibly."
Hawke quickly lost interest in whatever Bartrand and his scouts were looking for, and gave his companions a nod toward the unexplored tunnel, heading there before Bartrand could call them back. They walked silently, no one speaking, until Bodahn stepped in front of him.
"I don't know how I can thank you!" Bodahn said gratefully. I swear on my life, I will repay you for this!"
"There is no need ser dwarf," Hawke replied, keeping his voice down, and glancing around.
"But there is!" Bodahn insisted. "I don't know how, but I will find a way."
Hawke gave Varric a questioning glance as Bodahn left them, and Varric merely shrugged. True, they hadn't done anything to actually save the dwarf's son, but Varric wasn't one to argue if someone wanted to pay them.
The group moved forward again, glancing around as they walked. "This place seems intact," Varric said to Hawke. "Think we'll find anything?"
"Who knows?" Hawke replied. "Most likely we'll find more darkspawn… or perhaps rubble?" he teased.
"Hmph," Varric grunted, sounding awfully like his brother, though Hawke decided to keep that thought to himself. "Guess we'll have to go in to find out."
"It's not like the scouts are in any hurry to do so," Carver added, making his way to the front. "If we are going to find anything worthwhile, we should explore on our own." He strode forward, and Hawke watched, amused, as the rest of them waited for him to signal before they moved forward.
Hawke paused as he heard his brother roar, and immediately went charging forward, staff at the ready. He flung a stonefist at the nearest shade, before wondering why there were shades here to begin with. Before he could think too hard, the sharp sound of rocks smashing together had him turning to his left.
There was an activated golem, bearing down on his little brother, smashing its fists into the ground and stunning the smaller warrior. Hawke flung another spell, which seemed to not affect the stone creature at all, and he continued to try spell after spell, while yelling for the others to help him.
The shades now dispatched, the group turned their attention to the golem, which didn't stand a chance. Isabela struck the final blow, watching with a smirk as the creature stumbled and fell onto its face, unmoving.
She moved over to look more closely, and then leaned forward to pluck something from it, standing back up with a small diamond in her hand. "Ooh… shiny," she said, moving to place the gem in her tunic… somewhere.
"Rivaini," Varric said in a scolding tone. "All loot goes to those who paid for the expedition."
"Oh Varric, but of course!" she said as she continued on. Varric and Hawke exchanged unbelieving glances, sure that they would never see the diamond again.
Hawke followed after her, coming to a small staircase cut into the rock. His attention was caught by a shimmering pool on his right, and he crouched down to look at it.
"Orichalcum," Anders said, answering his unspoken question.
"The metal?" Hawke asked incredulously.
"Yes," Anders answered. "It is usually found in its liquid form, and crafted into solid metal. It's pretty rare, usually only used as a top coating for steel or iron weapons."
"Then we should take some," Hawke suggested. "That shopkeeper, Solivitus, will most likely pay handsomely for rare metal as he did for the other materials."
"You can use my waterskin," Merrill suggested, finishing off the last of her water, and handing the empty skin to Hawke, who then dipped it into the shining liquid, filling it as much as he could. He started to hand the waterskin back, then picturing Merrill accidentally drinking the metal, he placed it over his own shoulder, and wiping the excess from his fingers onto his pants.
"Ha!" Hawke barked. "Instant armor!" He laughed at his own joke, though no one else did, and they continued down the small stairs. They walked slowly, looking for anything of note, and ignored the sounds of Varric's brother storming furiously after them.
"I suppose this could be a thaig, it looks exactly like I've heard them spoken of," Varric said, turning in a circle. "But if it is…"
"If it is?" Hawke asked.
"Well, if it is… then these dwarves are nothing like the dwarves of today. How did things become so different? Paragons are basically like gods, and there are none depicted here."
Hawke didn't respond, as he could feel something strange about this tunnel as well. There was something… odd… that made it different, but he couldn't tell what it was.
Anders looked around himself, wondering what it was that seemed to be- - calling to him, almost. No, it had to be his imagination. Same hallway, same rubble, same reddish glow from the lava… everything was exactly the same. Which could only mean that the Deep Roads were getting to me again, he thought.
Isabela eyed the veins in the rock, wondering how they could have gotten so big. Did the dwarves leave them alone, or had it simply grown back since the time this tunnel was made? And what was it? A new type of mineral? What would glow such an unearthly red, and more importantly, was it valuable?
Varric glanced left and right, as he followed Hawke up the stairs in front of them, seeing a large rectangular altar, that was practically singing his name. He grinned as they reached the top, seeing a statuette that was shining out at him.
"It's definitely magic," Anders said, looking at it. "And not the good kind."
"Who cares?" Isabela stated with a smirk. "It's shiny!"
"Is that… lyrium?" Hawke mumbled to himself, not really asking the others.
"Do not touch it." They glanced over to Fenris, seeing his face twisted in a grimace. "If it is lyrium, it has something wrong with it."
"How can you tell?" Varric asked, eyeing the statuette from several angles. "It doesn't look like any lyrium I've ever seen."
Fenris ignored Varric, turning to Hawke and speaking in earnest about the need to stay away from the discovery, though he had no factual reasons why. Varric gestured to Isabela, who leaned forward giving Merrill a nudge, who took that as a request to pick it up.
They all looked at Merrill for a few moments, waiting for something bad to happen, as Bartrand entered the room, finally catching up to them. Varric took the statuette from Merrill and showed it to his brother, stopping his anger before it was unleashed. "Look Bartrand, an idol, made of pure lyrium I think. Could be worth a fortune!"
"Could be…" Bartrand replied under his breath as he mused at the turn of events lining up in front of him. Varric tossed the idol to him, and holding it, he changed his appraisal to most definitely worth a fortune. He glanced up to Varric and his… friends… and turned, walking silently back to the door. He closed it slowly, not making a sound, with only a glance back at his brother.
At that moment, Varric and Hawke were listening to Fenris and Anders argue, though they were actually agreeing with each other, both wanting to leave the idol where they found it. Hawke, while not convinced, seemed to understand their concerns, though he worked to convince them that they would investigate the idol before leaving the thaig, and if needed, would leave it behind.
Fenris glared, eyes hot, and Varric suddenly understood why his victims were always looking like they would piss themselves. "C'mon Broody, let's see what else we can find. If we find enough treasure, I'm sure Bartrand will forget about the idol."
"Speaking of…" Isabela interrupted, and they all turned to where Bartrand had been standing. "Uh… where did that door come from?" she asked, running over to it. She pushed and pulled at it before Hawke nudged her out of the way and tried himself.
"Bartrand!" Varric yelled out through the door. "The door shut, and we can't budge it!"
The group tensed as the muffled laughter came through. Varric felt his insides freeze. Bartrand couldn't be teasing him… Bartrand never teased. In fact, Varric had always assumed he got all the humor in the family.
"You always were a quick one, Varric," he heard, and he could scarcely believe it.
"You're joking?!" Varric spat out. "You're going to screw over your own brother?! For some lousy idol?!"
The harsh laugh came again, and Varric knew the answer before he heard it. "It's not just the idol… the location of this thaig alone is worth a fortune, and I am NOT splitting that three ways!" There was a pause, and Varric pressed closer to the door. "So long… brother."
Hawke was silent as he watched Varric. He and Carver were constantly fighting with each other, it was true, but this was different. It was strange, but he knew Carver cared, because of how mad he would get. This… Bartrand's voice held nothing but cold indifference, and knowing Varric… he knew he could hear it as well. He didn't know how he would react if his brother had done to him what Bartrand had just done to Varric.
Varric cleared his throat, eyes growing hard. The mourning for the few good memories he had with his brother was done, and now he just had his anger left. "I swear it Hawke," he said, still looking at the door. "I will find that son of a … sorry mother," he muttered, stopping his tirade.
Hawke reached out, clasping his shoulder as Varric sighed.
"So, we're trapped?" Carver asked.
"No," Varric answered, walking further into the room, looking around. "We will just take another way out."
"How do you know there is one, Varric?" Merrill asked, surprised.
Varric glanced back, his own face still hard and unforgiving. "Because, I have to see my brother again…. so I can kill him."
"What is it Cat? I'm pretty busy this morning."
Cat looked at Aveline, hesitating, since she certainly looked busy. "Nothing important Aveline, I'll see you tomorrow."
"Wait," Aveline called, and Cat turned back. "I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to shoo you away. I guess I'm a little overwhelmed by all of this," she said, gesturing to the full desk in front of her.
"Who wouldn't be?" Cat asked. "But if anyone can do it, you can."
"That's sweet," Aveline said with a smile. "Come on now, sit down. I have to remind myself to take time for friends, or I may end up without any."
Cat smiled, and pulled a chair closer to sit in it. "It really is nothing, I just feel like they would have been back by now. It's been almost a month."
"Hawke didn't really have an idea of how long it would take…" Aveline said with a shrug. "But I'm sure it won't be too much longer."
"I suppose so. I guess I'm just ready for something new."
"Oh I see, though if you needed an adventure, you should have gone with them," Aveline smirked at her, and Cat grinned.
Aveline needs to tease more, it helps keep her from being too serious, she thought. "No way was I going down there for weeks on end," Cat said. "Can you imagine what they all smell like?" she asked, wrinkling her nose, causing Aveline to chuckle.
"Not pleasant, I am sure." Aveline looked at her speculatively, and added, "speaking of, I hear you find the Knight Captain's company rather pleasant."
"Oh… we're doing that now, are we?" Cat asked slyly. "If you want the answer, you'll have to reciprocate…"
"What?" Aveline asked, taken aback.
"Oh come now, Aveline, surely you've at least appreciated the look of someone by now," Cat said with a giggle.
"I'm sure I don't know what you mean."
"No? There are plenty of handsome guards around you everyday…"
"That's… I mean, I'm not…"
"Um-hmm," Cat grinned again, enjoying not being the blushing one. "All right, I'll go first," she said, to ease her friend's discomfort. She was actually pretty happy that she and Aveline had this time without the others, because she probably wouldn't have gotten to know her as well as she had if anyone had stayed behind as well.
"Cullen is… a frustrating, stubborn, kind man, and has become a good friend."
"Interesting description," Aveline commented.
"Well, it's a unique situation, but we met about two years ago, when we were both in Ferelden. The group I was with saved him from mages who were torturing him."
"Are you serious?" she asked with surprise.
"Unfortunately, yes, though please do not share that with others, he doesn't like for people to know." Aveline nodded, the mood now somber. "At first, he was intent on repaying me for this, seeing me as his personal savior, though we are on more equal footing now. But…"
Cat tried to think of a kind way to express her frustrations, leaving her words hanging, and Aveline asked, "but?"
"He has a hatred for mages inside him now, one that I'm not sure he wants to let go of. It's become a wedge between us, that we are both ignoring, for now."
"Is that really such a bad thing?" Aveline asked, which had Cat taken aback.
"I would think any hatred or prejudice is a bad thing, Aveline."
"I understand, but when it comes to malificar…"
"Oh…" Cat replied, seeing what Aveline meant, "I suppose not, if that was the case, but it's not. He sees all mages that way, because he is taught that every mage is a malificar in hiding. And of course Meredith is shoving her view down his throat daily… Ugh! Like I said… frustrating."
"Then why are you spending so much time with him?" Aveline asked, confused. "I assumed he was trying to court you."
Cat gave her a deadpan stare. "No. It's not like that." She rolled her eyes. "Everybody always goes there first…" she muttered. "I'm spending time with him, because he needs friends. People who will help him, since his trauma will stay with him throughout his life. And… because he has ideas, when he's not focused on the bad times, dreams of a better life for both mages and templars, and when I hear them, I want to be better, make things better."
"Varric was right, you are an optimist," Aveline said with a smile.
"Yeah, well…" Cat mumbled, flustered. "I been in situations where I've done nothing and just hoped for the best. It doesn't work. If you want things to be better, you have to work to make them better."
"A sentiment I can agree with," she said as she nodded. "So nothing romantic then?" she asked, just to be certain. Cat shook her head. "Too bad, though I'll be sure to squash the rumors as best I can."
"I'd appreciate that," Cat said. "Though to be honest, I'm getting used to it. Issy is usually the one starting the rumors, after all."
"I still don't understand how you can be friends with her," Aveline groused, and Cat chuckled. "Laugh all you want, but I just don't see it."
"It's about accepting what is, and not expecting to change it," Cat said. "She may tease me, but she doesn't try to change me either, though to be fair, we certainly push each other towards our own way of thinking constantly."
"If I'm honest…" Aveline started, and Cat gave a good ahead gesture, "I'm a little jealous. I never had many friends, especially as close as you two are."
Cat grinned. "It doesn't take much, just a little give and take," she said while wiggling her eyebrows at Aveline. "Give me something Aveline," she teasingly begged.
"Maybe you'd better go first…" Aveline suggested.
"I swear if you back out, I'll be pissed," Cat warned, but thought of what to talk about. There were plenty of incidents she could think of, but she decided to let out what was actually on her mind. "All right then, there is someone who's been in my thoughts lately, which is extremely annoying."
"Oh?" Aveline asked.
"Yes, he's very handsome, in an orderly sort of way."
"Orderly?" she asked with a laugh.
"Yes!" Cat exclaimed. "You know… always looking immaculate, put together, nothing sloppy or torn…"
"I see," she replied. "And that's important to you?"
"I wouldn't have thought so," Cat answered with a small frown. "But…"
"But he's on your mind," Aveline finished for her.
"Right."
"There is… someone… similar, for me," Aveline admitted, and Cat's face lit up with a grin.
"Oh?" she said, asking for more.
"Very kind, and… soft spoken, not at all my type," she continued nervously. "But…"
"But he's on your mind," Cat finished with a dopey grin, just thinking about Aveline's future husband…if things go right! she thought.
"Yes."
"So…?" Cat asked. "What are you going to do about it?"
"Do?"
"Yeah, do. Are you going to let him know that you feel something? Maybe flirt a bit?"
"Oh… uh… no."
"Aveline…" Cat whined slightly. "How would you know what's there if you don't?"
"I'm… not really sure how to… do that." Aveline cleared her throat, very uncomfortable now. "What are you going to do, with…uh, yours?" she asked.
"Me?" Cat asked. "Nothing," she said dismissively.
"Nothing?!" Aveline asked incredulously. "Then how can you say I should?"
"Completely different," Cat barreled on. "For many reasons. One, we could never work, we come from… completely different worlds," Cat knew Aveline wouldn't take it as literally as she meant it, but still…
"Two, I think he is or will be committed to another, and three… well… I'm attracted, so something is obviously wrong with him."
Aveline smiled at her last comment, but had to admit, her reasons were good reasons not to pursue a man. Though in her own mind, Cat's reasons weren't exactly accurate. True, she might think the Starkhaven prince was too different, or spoken for by the chantry, but from what my reports said, he seemed to be pursuing her.
They continued to speak for a while, until a knock on the door brought Aveline back to the present. Cat took her leave, as a guardsman came with several messages for Aveline's immediate response, and as she watched Cat leave with a wave, she was glad she had followed her instinct to have Cat stay for a chat. She had looked happy when she left, which was better than when she had first come in her office.
"You're getting much better, Cat."
She grinned over at Sebastian, feeling the satisfaction that came whenever she hit the center of the target. "Thanks. Now if I could just hit the center while rolling, that would be an accomplishment!"
"Indeed it would!" he agreed. "Though in most fights, a hit is effective, no matter its location."
"True…" she agreed. Sighing, she followed him in setting down their weapons, and walking to the other end of the garden to collect their bolts.
"I imagine we won't have these daily practices once Hawke returns," Sebastian said, and Cat nodded thoughtfully.
"I don't know, it will depend on what happens. Hawke was so busy trying to get money together for the expedition, I doubt anyone has given thought to what comes after."
"Then perhaps we can plan on practicing unless Hawke needs you for something else?" he asked.
"Well, between Isabela, Fenris, Anders, Olivia and Cullen, I may be busy at first, but don't worry, I won't forget about you," she said with a smirk. "We'll just have to plan a little further in advance."
"We could set up some sort of schedule," he suggested.
"And that is why you'll get along fine with Hawke," she replied. "Just don't try to change his schedule, and you'll be friends for life."
"That's good to hear," he said softly. "I want your friends to like me."
"Honestly Sebastian, as long as Hawke likes you, you're good. Several of the others don't really get along, but Hawke somehow brings everyone together."
"Move Hawke. I'm going to cut his head off."
"Look, I may want to kill him as much as anyone, but he's still my brother," Hawke retorted.
"Doesn't matter to me," Varric grumbled.
"I know this isn't normal, but I agree with Fenris," Anders chimed in, his arms crossed and eyes narrowed.
"Oh please," Isabela scoffed. "He's harmless, just trying to prove he's as much a man, or more than the rest of you."
"And that's an excuse to get us all killed?" Anders shot back. "You wouldn't be feeling so generous if it had been you down there with those creatures."
Isabela rolled her eyes, and sauntered forward. "Let's just keep going. I'm ready to get out of here."
Fenris glared, but sheathed his sword and waited for everyone else to move,wanting to stay in the back. Merrill and Carver moved again at Hawke's word, and the rest filed in.
Hawke rubbed his forehead, as he started to walk. Nothing was going according to plan, and it was giving him quite the headache. As he looked up, he caught Isabela eyeing him and he gave her a smirk and a shrug, getting a wink in return.
"Hurry up!" Carver yelled back, causing everyone's annoyance to surface again. Anders slowed down, allowing Hawke to catch up.
"I'm concerned about this new lyrium we're seeing," Anders said softly, intending for Hawke to be the only one to hear.
"What's to worry about?" Isabela asked, peering around from Hawke's other side. "It's so rare none of us have heard of or seen it before. Plus, it's shiny, so it's worth something."
"Don't touch it," Anders warned. "We have no idea of the consequences."
"You'd be more fun if you didn't always think of consequences," Isabela observed.
"Well after being caught and imprisoned in the circle several times, I couldn't help but be more cautious."
"Like I said… no fun."
Hawke held up a hand, wanting to stop before the argument escalated. "We won't touch it," he decreed. "It doesn't feel right."
"This will all be a waste if we come home empty handed," Isabela pointed out, but she didn't argue with his decision.
The group was quiet as Carver came to a door, and opened it. The others rolled their eyes at his continued lack of caution, and pulled their weapons out, or placed hands on hilts, just in case.
"Shades!"
Hawke groaned, but jumped into the fray, already tired of the myriad of creatures they were encountering.
"Wha-?" Varric choked on his own question, as rocks rose from the ground and shaped themselves into humanoid figures. They came forward, attacking. Hawke stayed with his stonefist spell, finding it the most effective against the creatures they had encountered thus far.
He noticed that both Fenris and Carver were using their new mauls, that they had picked up along their journey. Merrill utilized her spirit bolts, and Anders stuck with freezing spells, assisting the warriors and rogues by keeping the creatures from attacking.
The creatures were destroyed back to rock, but the rocks gathered back together, forming a much larger creature, though its basic appearance was the same.
"Enough."
The voice was deep and unearthly, and Hawke immediately recognized it as belonging to a spirit of some kind. He looked at the rock, seeing a skull being used as the head, and though it was missing pieces including an eye, he stared at it, unmoved.
"You have proven your mettle," the voice said once the fighting stopped. "I would not see these creatures harmed without need."
"I'd say being attacked on sight gives us plenty of need." Fenris muttered, and Hawke couldn't help but agree.
"They will not assault you further," the creature said. Hawke opened his mouth to mention something about how they no longer had the ability to try, but the creature didn't give him a chance. "Not without my permission."
"Bloody flames, what were those things?" Varric asked. "They seem like rock wraiths, but…"
"They…hunger," the creature interrupted. "The profane have lingered here for ages, feeding on the magic stones until the need is all they know."
"They eat the lyrium?" Anders asked, surprised. "And you?" he demanded.
"I am not as they are… I am… a visitor."
"You're a demon, feeding on their hunger. I can sense it," Hawke said. If the creature could have smirked, it would have, since Hawke could hear it in its voice.
"I can sense your desire," it said. "You wish to leave this place… but you will need my aid to do so."
"Don't do it," Anders cautioned. "Demons trip you up every time."
"There's no need to be scared," Merrill said with a smile. "You can use it- - if you're careful."
Hawke thought for a moment, then asked, "Why do we need your aid?"
The creature nodded, sensing that it would get what it wanted. "There is a door. It leads to the paths above."
"I sense a catch," Isabela smirked.
"However-" the creature started, before Isabela interrupted with an "Aha! I knew there was a catch!"
"- it is sealed, and can only be opened with a key." It continued as if Isabela hadn't spoken. "I know where the key is, and if you do as I ask, I will tell you."
Tell, not show, Hawke thought, bringing his hand up to stroke the hair on his chin, then letting go, not liking how long it was getting.
"So? What are our options?" Varric asked, wanting to move on. Hawke glanced around, before settling his eyes on Merrill with a grin. She gave him a questioning look, even as she flushed at the attention.
"This something you can handle?" Hawke asked her, and she nodded.
"Of course," she replied, and strode forward pulling out her staff to attack.
"Foolish!" the creature bellowed, even as it fell to Merrill's attack. The profane, no longer held back, surged forward to attack, just as an abomination rose from the rubble of the creature.
The fight wasn't long, and as they moved to continue on, Hawke saw the nods of satisfaction and gratitude from both Anders and Fenris. It wasn't often they all could agree, but demons were something they all viewed the same way.
"Let's find that key," Hawke said to everyone, taking the lead.
Varric gripped his pack, deciding that the few extra pieces probably weren't the best idea he had, but he didn't want to put back any of the treasure he had taken. The fight with the actual rock wraith had almost stopped them from returning to Kirkwall- ever.
He glanced around, noting that everyone else was similarly burdened, but they had earned this. He smirked as he thought of the one lousy piece Bartrand had settled for, knowing he could torment his brother with that knowledge before sticking him with a bolt.
Hawke used the key they had come across, and the door opened without protest. Finally, something going our way! Varric thought. He walked through the doorway, glancing left and right, before settling on the right fork. "This looks like our way out," he announced.
"How long to get out?" Merrill asked pitifully.
"If we're unlucky?" He answered, "about a week." He just couldn't bring himself to sugarcoat it, even for her.
"And if we're lucky?" Hawke asked.
Varric gave a wicked looking smirk. "Then we'll stumble over Bartrand's half eaten corpse on the way," he said and started walking.
"This looks familiar," Hawke commented, as they passed a statue of a paragon.
"I would think so, this is where you got a love bite form a dragonling," Isabela said with a smirk, though it lacked her usual luster.
Hawke looked around at his crew, wanting to get them out of here as soon as possible. Merrill was the first to wilt down here, but they were all feeling the same now.
"Can we… take a break?" Carver asked, out of breath.
"What do you say Varric?" Hawke asked.
"We've made good time," Varric answered. "Only five days to get back here. A break couldn't hurt." He looked over at Carver, surprise and concern on his face as he saw him. "Junior? You okay?"
"I feel… wrong."
"Probably those deep mushrooms we found," Hawke said nonchalantly, looking around for somewhere to sit.
Hawke spun around as he heard the crashing sound, and the gasps from the others. "Carver!" he called, rushing over.
Everyone crowded around him, looking to Hawke in concern. True, Carver hadn't exactly endeared himself to them, but he was Hawke's brother.
"Like… that… templar," Carver said, breathing with difficulty.
"It's- - the blight," Anders said quietly. "I can sense it."
Hawke looked stricken, though he smiled at his brother. "Just like you, to not say anything," he said. "I suppose I should have listened to Cat's bad feeling," he added, hanging his head.
Fenris and Isabela looked questioningly at Anders, and he avoided their gaze. Maker, I don't want to see them again, he thought, closing his eyes. What if they insist that I go back with them?
He opened his eyes, looking down again. It wasn't the thought of Carver dying, nor the glares of Isabela and Fenris that had him speaking. It wasn't even the thought of Cat's reaction if he didn't. It was the look on Hawke's face, the guilt that he already was shouldering, that opened Anders' mouth.
"There may be something," he said, and Hawke looked up at him with hope. "You know I took those maps from some wardens that had come to Kirkwall. I had thought that they were looking for me, but it turned out they weren't. They were planning their own expedition into the Deep Roads."
Hawke looked confused, but Fenris grabbed his shoulder and glared at him. "Why would you keep this to yourself?!" he demanded.
Anders knocked his hand away, glaring back. "I was trying to avoid them! I didn't want them to know where I was, and Hawke only needed the maps!" He turned back to Hawke, lowering his voice. "If they are still down here, we can bring Carver to them…"
"And what?" Carver asked. "Become a Grey Warden?" He laughed, but was interrupted by a coughing fit.
"Is it a cure?" Hawke asked.
"Yes, I suppose you could look at it that way. Though it is not without a price- one not everyone is willing to pay."
"A price? Maker's breath Anders, just spit it out!" Hawke said somewhat desperately.
"The joining is… unpleasant.. and permanent. Your brother may survive the blight but at the cost of becoming a Grey Warden. It is not an easy life, trust me."
"But… what about you?" Hawke asked, still confused. "You aren't a Grey Warden anymore."
Anders shook his head. "You think I got away? No. This is temporary. Eventually, they or the circle will drag me back. I have no illusions about that."
Fenris wondered at that moment if Cat truly knew what she had asked of Anders, and how she was able to even ask it of him. His respect for the mage grew slightly, though he wouldn't admit it to him… ever.
"But it is possible?" Hawke asked, thinking it through. "How does one even become a Grey Warden?"
"I can't tell you." Hawke looked up, wondering why. "But it's not something you can undo once it's done, even if you want to."
"This keeps sounding better and better," Carver said softly, his breathing easier as he laid there, hardly moving.
"I'm not sure if they'll even agree to it, if we can find them in time," Anders finished, knowing he wasn't giving them much.
Nodding, Hawke stood, and started helping his brother up. "Let's go. It's our only real option." Carver's arm over his shoulder, Hawke looked at Anders, gesturing for him to lead out.
"Hmm," Anders stopped, glancing around, though he was looking with something other than his eyes.
"What is is?" Isabela asked.
"I think they are nearby," he replied, though he didn't move. "Or… it could be darkspawn."
Fenris pulled out his sword, standing in front of Hawke and Carver. "Which way?" he asked.
Anders glanced back, seeing Isabela, Merrill and Varric with their weapons ready. The corner of his lip twitched up, and he led them down a corridor, pulling his own staff out as well. If it was the wardens, I won't go without a fight, but the same was true with darkspawn…
As the tunnel opened up, the group could see a larger cluster of darkspawn running toward them. Hawke stopped, as the others moved forward, attacking at range, and staying close in order to protect him. They fought with a ferocity that Hawke hardly ever saw, and while the situation was dire, he enjoyed the chance to observe these people that he had gathered together, since he so rarely got the opportunity. He made a mental note to spend time training with them, to better take advantage of their individual skills.
Anders stepped forward, seeing an end to their fight, when an arrow pierced through the head of the last darkspawn from behind, spraying his face with black ichor. He grimaced, wiping the gunk from his face with his sleeve, and glancing up as a small group of men in blue heraldry stepped forward, swords and bows still pointed at them.
"Anders."
Fenris smirked, as the dark haired warden looked at Anders with disdain.
"Uh, fancy meeting you here, Nathaniel," Anders replied sheepishly, though both had yet to lower their weapons.
"I could say the same. I thought you were through with fighting darkspawn."
Anders rolled his eyes, antagonizing the warden, and Fenris felt a sudden kinship with the man, as he constantly felt the same around the healer. "I'm not here to fight darkspawn Nathaniel, I came looking for you."
The taller warden looked over at Nathaniel with a cheeky grin. "Soooo… this is the mage who was thought to be dead, only to show up to steal your maps?" he asked Nathaniel.
"Anders," Nathaniel spoke, a smirk on his own face, "this is Alistair, the Warden Constable. Alistair, Anders." he introduced them, finally lowering his bow.
Anders paled, and stepped back, muttering "Maker's breath," and Fenris and Isabela both stepped up to his sides, weapons out. Varric gave them speculative looks, while Merrill looked confused.
"Relax," Hawke said, as he brought his brother forward. "I know we are not always successful, but we try to not fight with allies… usually."
Nathaniel didn't reply to this comment, instead taking in Carver, and turning to Anders. "You mean this boy as a recruit, don't you," he said, not really asking. He shook his head, glaring at Anders. "That is no kindness." He turned to address Hawke. "I'm sorry, I know it is no consolation, but we do not recruit Grey Wardens out of pity."
"No pity required," Hawke shot back with a smirk. "Carver is an excellent warrior, and you would gain much by recruiting him."
"Now he compliments me," Carver muttered, and several of them smiled, including Alistair, but Nathaniel wasn't budging.
"Regardless, we cannot."
Anders sighed, and stepped forward again. "If my word is worth anything to you Nathaniel, this one is worth your time."
"How could it be?!" Nathaniel demanded as he rounded on Anders. "You still treat it all as a simple thing, easily ignored."
Alistair placed a hand on his arm, and he calmed, his face a mask again. "It is true," Alistair said to the group. "Joining the Wardens may be as much a death sentence as the sickness."
Hawke looked to Anders, unsure of what to say to convince them. "He's my brother. I can't just watch him die."
Alistair looked away, but Nathaniel didn't move, stoic as always Anders thought.
"He'll die anyway," Anders said, as much pleading as he could muster. "Take him and try… I'm… asking you."
Nathaniel's eyebrow winged up at that, and he looked at Anders as if trying to decipher his words. He glanced over to Alistair, and received a nod, then sighed.
"You may regret this," he warned. "You may end up never seeing him again."
Hawke looked down, feeling as if there was no good choice here. "You sure about this?" Carver asked.
"No… but I want you to live,"Hawke replied.
"If he comes, he comes now," Nathaniel said, not enjoying feeling like he was ripping brothers apart. Damn the blight, and all those who started it, he thought, though not for the first time. "Being a Grey Warden is not a cure, it is a calling."
"Then, this is it," Hawke said, helping Carver over to Alistair.
"Take care of mother," Carver said. "Tell her I don't regret my choice in coming, but her idea to stay was good too." Alistair put his arm around his own shoulders, forcing Carver to the tips of his toes.
"Farewell," Nathaniel said, and Carver repeated it, as they turned around. "We'll have to hurry men," he called to the others with him. "We need to make the surface as soon as possible."
Hawke and his friends stood and watched, even after the Wardens were out of sight, and until they could no longer hear them.
"Shouldn't we have just gone with them to the surface?" Merrill asked, breaking the silence.
"They will most likely exit somewhere far from Kirkwall," Anders replied, then turned to Hawke. "I'm so sorry, Hawke," he began, but Hawke shook his head, and he fell silent.
"Thank you Anders. I don't know what will happen, but this way I have hope." Hawke glanced back to the tunnel the Wardens disappeared into, then finally back to his friends. "Let's go home," he said quietly.
The mood was much less desperate now, even Varric's vengeance had cooled enough in the face of Hawke's tragedy. The group stayed close together as the walked on, heading back to Kirkwall, each of them feeling as if they had failed. Hawke would have been appalled to know that they all felt as if they had failed him, because the only failure he could see was his own. How will I tell Mother? he thought in anguish.