Zevran was thinking furiously, trying to determine the best way to handle the reticent Champion. If Fenris was accurate, Hawke wouldn't want to talk to his friends right then, let alone him, so Zevran knew he needed to be persuasive, and perhaps more than a little tricky.
His dove wanted the Champion, and if he had anything to say about it, she would have him before the day was out.
As they approached the mansion, Zevran stopped and looked to Fenris. "I think it would be better if I handled this myself," he suggested.
Fenris looked at him wryly. "Really?" he asked. "I have a feeling Hawke will send you away before you get two words out."
"I am not so easily dissuaded," Zevran assured him.
"That is something I am well aware of," Fenris smirked. "However, you are not the only one that wants to help Cat have all that she desires."
"Ah," Zevran smiled. "So you are aware of my intentions then?" Fenris' look said that he did, and Zevran nodded. "Very well. Have you had time to improve your game of Wicked Grace?" he asked.
"You and Isabela may still be able to beat me, but few others," Fenris replied.
"Then just follow my lead, and be prepared to bluff," Zevran said with a grin, and led the way to Hawke's door.
Getting in took only convincing Bodahn of his good intentions, and Zevran asked the dwarf to let Hawke's mother know what he was attempting, so that there would be no interruptions. Bodahn nodded happily, and as he announced their guests, he gestured to Hafter to follow him into the kitchen with the promise of a treat.
Hawke glanced over his shoulder at the pair of elves, and Zevran could see him roll his eyes and grimace. He hardly wanted to speak with them now it was apparent, and his defenses were up. Speaking easily, and adding a little awe to his voice, Zevran began talking to Fenris.
"You were right of course my friend, I must not have been paying attention yesterday when we were here. This house is quite lovely, not at all like I would expect of a noble estate."
From the corner of his eye, Fenris could see Hawke turning slightly to glare, and he didn't let his smile show. Zevran is quite the manipulator. Sorry Hawke, but it is for your own good, he thought. "Yes, this is the estate that Hawke's mother grew up in, though it was lost to the family for a time. Hawke reclaimed it once he had the means to do so."
"Ah, even better!" Zevran said, sounding impressed. "My dove mentioned that the Champion reminded her of the Warden, but I hadn't seen it myself before now."
Hawke bristled, and finally turned, and stood. "Do you need something?" he asked evenly. "I told Cat that I would send word when I needed you."
"Oh?" Zevran asked with an ignorant smile. "We must have missed getting the message you sent along. After rescuing a lovely woman named Nyssa from her former husband, we assumed you would be eager to track down the others, in case they too were blood mages looking for revenge."
"I wouldn't say eager," Hawke retorted.
"Ah, my apologies," Zevran said with a small smile, which simply grated on Hawke's remaining nerves.
"But yes, that is the next job to complete," Hawke continued. "I simply haven't finished with my work yet," he said, gesturing toward the desk that was heavy with stacks of paper.
"Ah, I see," Zevran said, giving a small nod in acknowledgment "my apologies, again, I will be brief." Hawke sighed but nodded, and Zevran continued, even as he started to move slowly around the room, looking at random things that were placed throughout as if they were fascinating.
"My dove and I have not been able to catch up as I would like as yet," Zevran began, and Fenris noticed Hawke's fists clench, wondering what that was about. "However I am well aware from both Fenris and Isabela that you are the main reason that she is safe and content here. I owe you much for this."
"Cat is a capable fighter, and has saved others as often as they have saved her," Hawke stated, refusing to acknowledge the gratitude.
"Your modesty does you credit," Zevran said with a smirk, as if he didn't believe it for a moment. "though I am well aware of your own deeds to keep her safe. As her guardian, I owe you a debt."
"You owe me nothing," Hawke countered.
"Assassins, mages, templars, and an ogre?" Zevran replied, as he finally turned to look at Hawke. "You obviously care for her to protect her from such things."
"As I said, I did nothing worthy of a debt," Hawke replied, crossing his arms in front of his chest, and Fenris glanced over to Zevran, giving him a signal that Hawke was now where the elf had wanted him.
"I'm afraid I would never be able to live with myself if I did not, even such a… deficit," Zevran said, giving Fenris a return signal in his movements.
"Besides Hawke," Fenris spoke up. "Cat is insistent that she would be dead many times over if not for you."
"Truly, I doubt my dove will let me leave without repayment," Zevran added.
Hawke's eyes widened slightly. "Well… I am sure we can think of something," he said quickly, and Zevran and Fenris exchanged a look. "Having you along on this next job will even the slate," he announced.
"Are you certain?" Zevran asked, feigning concern. "My dove's life is surely worth many months of my time to assist you."
"No, no," Hawke said, seeing his chance to rid himself of the elf, and have his life back to normal. "Your help is invaluable, and besides, as I said, you do not owe me. Cat is part of the crew, and we all protect each other. There is no repayment needed."
"Ah, that is good to hear," Zevran replied, and Fenris turned so that Hawke couldn't see the slight grimace on his own features. He had seen this many times, as Zevran would make his opponent feel as though their victory was at hand, just before he took everything. He could sympathize, as he had been in the same situation in many a hand of cards.
"I will let my little dove know, I am certain she will be pleased." Zevran walked forward, reaching out his hand, and Hawke reluctantly shook it. "She will miss all of you so very much, once we return to Ferelden. I am positive that she will want to visit quite often," he said, masking his wicked smirk behind a friendly smile as he took in the shell-shocked look on the Champion's face. "We will take our leave, and let you finish," he announced, moving to Fenris.
"Let us know when you are ready," Fenris added, moving toward the foyer, noting that Hawke had yet to move. Seeing the look on his face, he felt slightly bad, but knew that their intentions were good. He moved to the door, and opened it, letting Zevran out before walking through, and closing it behind him.
Returning to his own home, Fenris wondered what would happen next. Zevran seemed certain that Hawke would do one of two things. Either he would fight to keep Cat, or he would accept the idea that she was leaving, and admit defeat.
Fenris could scarcely believe Hawke would let her go without a fight, however his behavior the past few weeks had been evident of him doing just that. He hoped that that wasn't the case, but as Zevran said, if he did, then he didn't deserve her.
Along with that, Zevran was hardly ever wrong about these types of things, Fenris had seen it many times in his months traveling with the assassin. He seemed certain that Hawke would come for Cat, and he wanted the two of them to be gone when he did.
What Fenris wasn't certain about, was what Cat would do once she found out what they had done.
Entering, and hearing the giggling coming from the kitchen, the two of them smiled at each other before going to meet the women.
"You're back!" Cat said with delight.
"Indeed," Fenris replied. He turned to Nyssa. "So, have you decided what you would like to do?" he asked. "If Cat hasn't said so, you are more than welcome to remain here."
Nyssa flushed, and ducked her head, something that Fenris was used to with her, but it still baffled him. She had no problem speaking to him, but would always seem shy to do so.
"I think I will return home, at least until I decide what to do," she replied. "I am in charge of the shop while Serine is away, and I do not want to be too far away, and encourage thieves."
"A wise thought," he answered with a nod. "In fact I had a few things I was going to bring to you for mending," he said as he remembered.
"Well, if you want to get them, I'll simply take them with me," she answered with a smile.
"We would hardly let you return without an escort," Zevran said easily, giving Fenris a glance, and a nod. "Your former man did some damage to your home as well, which we should look at."
"He did?" Nyssa said with a frown. "He didn't even seem like the Huon I knew," she mumbled.
"Being kept in the Gallows, unable to see anyone can change a person," Cat said gently. "Don't blame yourself."
"He wanted to run away, but we didn't have anything," Nyssa said softly, looking down at the ground. "I got the job with Serine originally in order to give us a way to get away from Kirkwall," she explained. "And then the templars came for him. He was gone so long, but what else could I do, but work and live?" she asked.
"I think you did the best you could," Fenris replied, and Nyssa looked up surprised. He seemed embarrassed at the look she gave him. "We'll take you home."
"Yes, I feel a deep desire to see where you live," Zevran added, grabbing Nyssa and dipping her low, his eyebrows raising in a suggestive way.
It did the trick, and Nyssa started laughing. "Very well," she replied. She turned to look at Cat, to ask if she would come too, but Zevran started speaking first.
"Little Dove, it may be wise to ready another room," he suggested. "Just in case things are too damaged at Nyssa's home."
Cat looked at him skeptically, even as he stood, pulling Nyssa back upright. Fenris left the room, going up to collect the items that needed mending, and hoping to avoid being asked for his opinion on the damage. Nyssa watched him leave, and Cat noted the avid interest on her face as she did.
"Wouldn't she just be sharing your room if that were the case?" Cat asked, and Zev smiled as Nyssa made a shocked noise.
"I have found that women enjoy having their own space, even when… involved with another," he replied easily.
"If you want to take Nyssa home by yourself, you can just say so Zev," she replied with a smile.
"Thank you my dove," Zevran grinned, turning to Nyssa, who seemed almost mesmerized by his smile. "Then we shall take our leave."
"Have a good time!" she called, moving to clear the dishes from the table. "Come back anytime Nyssa!" she added, though she didn't get a reply. She shook her head, smiling as she remembered her own reaction to Zevran at first. And somehow, he looked even more appealing now then he did then, so she couldn't blame Nyssa at all.
Hawke sat at his desk, his head down, his hands in his hair. He glared up to his hair, realizing that the cut made it so that he hardly had anything to grip. His thoughts turned to Cat, remembering how her hands would always find their way into his hair when he had held her, just as his own hands seemed to always play with hers.
Seems we've both changed, haven't we Cat?
He could remember when he first saw her, though he doubted that she knew it at the time. His first impression had been that she was an attractive, yet unattainable daughter of some noble in the city. He had seen her as they passed each other on a staircase in Lowtown, and he had enjoyed looking at the time.
Then, some time later, he had seen her again, but this time she was in the Hanged Man, which was strange enough in itself. She was with Isabela, another attractive woman, and he had a few different thoughts at that time, most that he wasn't proud of.
Seeing Isabela fight, he had been happy to assist her, and hopefully gain a new member of his crew. He hadn't been sure of Cat when Isabela drug her along, but once he pushed Isabela about it, and found out that Cat had been the hooded figure that had been following them that night, he knew she wouldn't be a liability.
She and Isabela pushed back at him at every turn, but he found that he actually enjoyed it, though he would never admit such a thing. They challenged him, they made him work harder, and focus more on his people, ensuring that his decisions were truly for their greater good, not just what he wanted.
Isabela had offered what he thought he wanted, some easy sex, no strings attached. But instead of going the easy way, he found himself drawn to the complicated woman. She had gone from noble's daughter to prized whore, and remained as unattainable as ever, until the first time he held her.
She had cried all over him, he remembered, and acting on instinct had her looking at him with wide eyes, her breathing going erratic. No matter what he had thought she was, he knew she was truly affected by him at that point. Yet, she pushed him away, and he realized she was more complicated than he ever wanted.
He tried to let her go, he didn't want the trouble, and yet, he was drawn in like a templar needing his lyrium. Even after all his mistakes, she continued to forgive him, to draw him closer.
Now here he was, trying to convince himself that it was better that she go, feeling he couldn't be near her all the time without going crazy, yet knowing that he needed her in his life somehow, even if she wasn't his.
His emotions were all over the place, and he had to employ all his control to not let them consume him. It was just as when Nathaniel was here. He knew she could be happy with Nathaniel, and yet he just couldn't let her go, knowing he might never see her again. And here he was again, battling himself between wanting her to be happy, yet knowing it could destroy him if she left him forever.
He didn't know that he could even name what he was feeling, it was as if he were going into a fight. His adrenaline surged, and he stood suddenly, breathing heavy for a moment, before turning to the door, not even grabbing his staff in his haste.
Cat stopped cleaning for a moment, wondering why Fenris hadn't come back into the kitchen. She wiped her hands on a cloth, and moved out to the main room, calling his name. Hearing nothing, she moved up the stairs, and peeked into his open door.
He's not here? she thought in confusion. Why would he go with Zev, when he and Nyssa were obviously going to have a encore of last night? She pursed her lips in thought, noting again the looks that Nyssa had been giving Fenris, then shook her head. Fenris, for all that he's changed for the better, has mentioned that he isn't ready for intimacy. Or perhaps that was just his excuse for Zev's flirting? she wondered. But it's doubtful that they're having some sort of ménage à trois.
Heading back downstairs, she heard something near the front door, so she headed over, thinking that perhaps Fenris had just stepped out for food, or to get more water, and was having a hard time opening the door with his hands full.
She grabbed the door handle, a smart remark ready, and pulled, just as someone pounded on the door, which pushed it open fast, almost catching her in the face.
Her face showed her shock as she looked out seeing Hawke, his own surprise showing, his fist still in the air, standing just outside the door.
"Hawke?" she asked, her hand going to her heart as it beat erratically. "You scared me," she said with a laugh.
"I'm sorry?" he offered. "Why were you right behind the door?" he asked.
"I thought Fenris was trying to come in with his arms full," she replied chuckling. She stepped back, pulling the door back as well. "Come on in," she said.
"Fenris isn't here?" he asked as he stepped in, looking around.
Of course, she thought, he came to see Fen.
"No, sorry. I'm not sure where he went, but since you weren't him, he must have gone with Zev to take Nyssa home."
"Is she all right?" Hawke asked, still looking around, and Cat began to follow his gaze, wondering what he was looking at.
"Yes, though I think we have Zev to thank for that," she replied with a suggestive grin, though she lost the look when she saw Hawke's sneer. She had no idea what his problem was, but she didn't need another reason to feel bad, so she decided to just get it over with. "I can let them know you came by," she offered. "Or you're free to wait. "I have a couple things to finish in the kitchen."
His gaze swiveled, and he pinned her with it. "I came for you," he said matter-of-factly.
Her eyebrows rose, uncertainty in her eyes. "Uh, all right," she replied, wondering if he knew what those simple words from him could do to her heart. "What can I do for you?" she asked.
He stepped closer, and she automatically stepped back, without thinking why. He stepped forward again, and she retreated. Her heart couldn't take much more of this, it was practically bursting, wanting to shower him with all the love she felt, that he didn't seem to want. Having him close was just not something she could handle at the moment.
She could see his eyes narrow slightly, as he focused on her, and stepped forward again. "Don't go," he said softly.
She was in the middle of stepping back again, when his words stopped her, but then she shook her head and finished, taking an extra step for good measure. "We can hardly have a conversation when you're that close," she replied.
It was obvious that she didn't understand what he was asking, so he shook his own head and started again. "Your friend came to see me this morning," he began.
"My friend?" she asked ruefully. "Obviously he said something that made you mad, if you won't even use his name." She smiled at him, hoping that would be enough, but since he still looked upset, she tried to explain. "Look, Zev is… well, we have a special and… complicated relationship," she said, trying to figure out how to get it all across in just a few words.
Hawke looked down, taking deep breaths and trying to hold back the beast that was jealousy inside of him. He reminded himself that he didn't care about the elf, only her, no matter what she had done in the past. He had his own colorful past, didn't he?
"I don't care about that," he said gruffly, and Cat was taken aback, her own eyes narrowing.
"Look, I can hardly be held accountable for what he said that made you upset," she grumbled, not enjoying Hawke dumping this on her. "Take it up with him."
"I don't care a whit about him," Hawke said, his volume increasing as his patience waned. His hands were itching to touch her, yet every time he stepped forward to do so, she would retreat from him.
Cat's eyes narrowed fully this time, her frown evident, even as she continued to evade him. She stepped back again, finding herself up against the large fireplace in the center of the room, no longer able to move back, as Hawke stepped forward again.
"What in the world is your problem then?" she asked, aggravated, crossing her arms in front of herself defensively.
Hawke's left eyebrow rose, though whether at her stance or her words, she wasn't certain. "Why would I have a problem?" he asked.
"That's what I'm asking!"
"I have no problem," he said quietly, his new tone making her more cautious then if he were yelling. "It's been a rough couple of days," he said easily, though she could tell he was wound tightly.
His arms rose to the mantle by her shoulders, effectively caging her in. "First I find that you've been kidnapped… again."
"Don't say it like that," she argued. "It's not like I ask for it to happen!"
"Oh no?" he asked sardonically. "Did you not tell the man that he could TAKE you?" he questioned. "That was how Bodahn and Mother worded it."
"Well, yes," she admitted. "But, it was only to keep Leandra safe!" she argued, not certain why her voice was getting louder when his went softer. "I knew you couldn't bear it if she were gone!"
She jumped as he punched the wall above the mantle, hard enough that she worried about his hand. "I can't bear it when YOU are gone!" he thundered. "Do you even consider what that does to all of us?!"
She had almost melted at the first sentence, but her back went up right after. "I'm so sorry to inconvenience you all!" she snarled. "How many times must I say that I can take care of myself?!"
He swung away now, throwing his hands up in the air. "Of course!" he snapped sarcastically. "Which time?" he asked snidely. "After the ogre almost killed you? Or when the assassins had stabbed you? Perhaps when that mage bitch put you in a coma with a blood spell?! Or when Lord Cyril-"
He broke off, as Cat reared back as if he had struck her, her face drained of color. It effectively drained his frustration away as well. He looked at her in concern, knowing there wasn't much that could cause such a reaction in her. And involving that pig of a man, there was only one.
His fists clenched, and he practically spat the words. "I'll kill him."
Cat had no doubt whatsoever that he spoke the absolute truth. "I…" she swallowed, starting again. "I won't tell you not to, but please, don't tell anyone else," she begged. "I'm trying to get past it… to let it go."
"Let it GO?!" he asked incredulously.
"For my own sake, not his," she stressed. "I don't want to ever think about him again. And if I happen to run into him, I want to be able to walk up and punch him in the face, not freeze or crumble as I've done before."
He stopped, just looking at her, wondering how she could be so aware of herself, and her needs- not just immediately, but in the future, and how she couldn't see the needs radiating from him.
"All right," he agreed. "But if I ever see him again, I'll castrate him at the very least."
"...all right," she finally answered, not really wanting to argue that point, since she sort of wanted him to. She moved away from the mantle, not wanting to be trapped again. Her emotions were a wreck, and she just wanted to go back to cleaning her kitchen. It would probably be more clean than it had been in weeks as she worked off her emotions.
"I'll apologize, since I was so focused on keeping Leandra safe that I didn't consider how my being captive would affect everyone else. I'll be sure to apologize to them as well," she said, faking a calm demeanor.
"I don't need an apology, I just don't want it to happen again," he replied. He was studying her, since he hadn't been thinking of her reactions when he had been so close before. Now that he thought back however, he was certain she still had feelings for him. At least, he hoped so.
"Fine, consider the lesson learned," she said defensively. "I can't promise to not put others' safety before my own again, but I'll try to think of how that affects my friends." She stepped over towards the foyer, "If that's all," she said in question, obviously trying to get him to go.
"No, it's not," he replied. Time for a gamble then, he thought in worry. All or nothing, because if she doesn't want me anymore, she's going to leave.
He could see the uncertainty in her eyes, and he hoped that was because she was wanting him as much as he was wanting her. "What do you need?" she asked.
He smirked, catching her off guard. "Need? Funny almost, that you should ask it that way," he replied, though this time he didn't move. "I need quite a bit, actually. And it all come back to you, Cat."
"What?" she asked, and his smirk grew as he saw the uncertainty go to panic laced with desire.
"I have a burning need for you," he said, his voice soft as he focused all he had on her, looking her up and down. "I thought that I could suppress it, that perhaps it would go away, so I wouldn't feel ever again as I did while you were gone. I even thought that you would be better off with someone else, someone that could give you everything you wanted, everything you deserved, because I can't."
He watched as her eyes went wide, as her hands clenched and opened on the edge of her tunic. As her tongue peeked out to wet her lips, as she gulped and swallowed, showing signs of nerves.
"But I can't do that anymore," he said, looking her in the eyes. He could see a little fear yes, but the desire he saw was growing, so he continued. He had to finish what he felt, he had to get it all out. "I can't suppress the need anymore, because it's consuming me."
His own desire was clawing at him, demanding to be freed. "I'll give you a minute," he decided in that moment. "Enough time to tell me to leave, to tell me you don't want me. Enough time to even try to get away, because my control is barely holding on as I speak. But after that, I am going to come for you, Cat," he warned. "And I'm going to take, and take and take, until this need is satisfied."
Cat blinked, unsure of what was happening, feeling so incredibly hot, and yet slightly alarmed that she was so suddenly aware of the need he was speaking of, as if he had been blocking it from her all this time, and then suddenly pulled back the curtain to show her. Her throat was dry, her body was tingling, and she had no idea what to do about it.
Okay, I may have some idea, she corrected her own thoughts, as her legs started rubbing together. But… that look in his eyes… no one has ever looked at me like that before…
She squeaked as Hawke began to move, though he didn't move quickly. He took deliberate steps toward her, and though the largest part of her wanted him to catch her, her uncertainty was enough to carry her backwards.
For every step he took, she scrambled back from him, not really recognizing this Garrett, as he was showing yet another side of himself.
She had respected the leader he was, his sense of justice and right, even when it was more difficult. She had fallen hard for the cuddling and flirtatious Garrett that he had been with her. And while shocking, she had even loved the focused and driven man she had seen that morning. One willing to sacrifice things for others of greater import.
This Garrett, was also driven and focused, but having it all directed at her was unnerving. Added to that, she believed him when he said he was barely holding back his control. What would happen when he lost control? she thought, knowing that that was the source of her concern. Would it be as it had been before with Steve? He had only taken from me, and it will hurt even more to have Garrett do the same.
Cat, in a moment of panic, turned and ran to the kitchen, as it was nearest. She needed a moment, just a moment to decide. Wasn't this what she wanted? Why was she freaking out?!
The door swung open behind her, and she turned to Hawke, as he continued to stalk forward. She held her ground this time, though she could hardly back up through the table even if she didn't. She loved him, so she wouldn't turn him away, not when he was finally willing to admit needing her.
That didn't stop her heartbeat from racing as he continued to move in slow and deliberate steps until he was right in front of her.
"One last chance to tell me to stop," he warned. Not a moment later, he had reached out, encircling her with his arms, and looking down at her face that was inches from his own. "Good," he said, and captured her mouth with his.
Cat had nothing left that kept her from him, and surrendered to him willingly. He moved slightly, tilting her head back, and pulling himself from her lips, he attacked her neck with tongue and teeth, as her hands tried to grab at his hair.
She didn't understand how she was already gasping for air. Before with St-- Interrupting her own thoughts, her mind emptied as Hawke lifted her and set her on the table.
He knew he had no finesse, his control was shattering into pieces, and he could only think of getting to where he wanted. He needed flesh, he needed the taste of her, he needed to be inside her, and he needed all of these at that very moment.
He worked his mouth down her neck even as his hands pulled her tunic up. He moved from her skin only for a moment, pushing the tunic up and reattaching under it. He pushed slightly, helping her lay back as he continued to feast on her.
Cat was panting, she couldn't help it. His lips were igniting fires across her skin. It was a completely new experience, having his face on her without the scratching from his beard. He didn't bother trying to undo her breast band, he just pushed it up and out of the way, and latched onto her, pulling a moan from her lips.
His mixture of suckling and nibbling were driving her insane, and she could feel the tightening in her breasts as they responded to him. Her head was moving left and right erratically, the feelings piling and compounding in the center of her body. He moved from one side to the other, using his hand where his mouth had been to continue the delicious torment.
He noticed as her hips began to rise, though she didn't seem to, and he grinned as he thought of what awaited him, though he wasn't quite ready to move there yet. He had barely begun what his body was demanding he take. While his mouth continued to feast, he grabbed her thighs, pulling her down the table slightly towards him, so he could reach her easily.
His hand glided along her stomach, moving in an unhurried pace so as not to shock her, until he found his goal. He murmured his pleasure against her skin, even as she gasped in delight. He didn't want it over too quickly, but before he barely began moving his fingers he could feel her clenching.
She panted, even as her body relaxed again, and he smirked as he thought of bringing her up again and again. She had already started moving against him again, her hands gripping anywhere she could reach, and any control he had left was gone in an instant.
Hawke finally had the energy to raise himself up, looking closely at Cat as he did, worried that he had hurt her. Seeing the lazy smile on her face relieved him, along with the distressed noise she made as he moved.
The memory of the last time she made such a noise swamped him. He had been putting a slightly drunk Cat to bed, and she had whined about losing not only him, but his cloak as well. Then when he had finally stood up, she had offered to let him stay, though she warned him she wasn't "good at the sex."
He returned to the moment and leaned back down, kissing her right under her ear. "Darling," he whispered, "you are no less than amazing at the sex."
"Mm," she replied, her eyes still closed. "After all that, how can a simple kiss still get me excited?" she mumbled.
He grinned, determined to give more than a simple kiss, though he thought it may be time to move from the kitchen before anyone came home. He moved back again, taking in the sight of her, her shirt and breast band pushed up under her arms, her pants and underwear stopped on her legs by her boots.
"I've never seen you look so lovely," he commented with a smile, and she finally opened her eyes to look at him.
"I'd say the same, but I'm still getting used to your new look," she replied.
He reached up, feeling his clean face. "I miss my beard," he responded. "It's awful."
She moved, using her elbows to prop herself up. "Then why did you do it?" she asked in confusion.
He looked away for a moment, then looked back at her. "I told myself I needed a change, I needed to refocus."
"Speaking of," she said with a questioning look. "I seem to remember you saying that you thought I would be better off with someone else?"
She thought he would look sheepish at least, but he just nodded. "I did, and I do."
She smirked. "Then what was all this?" she gestured towards the two of them.
"This was me being selfish," he replied.
"Hey," she said to get his attention. "This wasn't selfish," she argued. "I love you. I couldn't be with someone else, even if you wanted me to."
He stopped, realizing what she was saying. He shook his head. "I should have known," he said, looking a little sheepish now. "I should have just asked."
"Asked what?"
"Uh… I came here last night, hoping to confess my feelings, hoping that I wasn't too late."
"You did?" she asked, confusion covering her face. "When?"
"After everyone talked me into it," he replied with a laugh. "I can't believe I've been so stubborn about this, and I am certain I'll hear of it often."
"Oh, and we weren't home," she concluded, laughing with him.
"Well…" he answered, embarrassed. "No one answered, so I stepped in, and saw a light upstairs…"
She gasped, sitting up straight, and adjusting her band and tunic. "I'm sorry you had to see that," she said, though she was chuckling as she righted herself. Looking back at him, and seeing the look on his face, she was back to confused. "What?"
He shook his head. "I'll apologize because I thought it was you. You and Zevran."
Her eyes went wide. "You did?!"
"To be fair, all I heard was sex noises, and then a woman yelling out his name," he explained. "But not only are you right, you couldn't be with someone else when you love someone, but," he smirked at her. "your sex noises are completely different." He leaned forward and kissed the tip of her nose. "And I like them much better."
Since he had corrected his erroneous assumptions on his own, she forgave him quickly, and gave him a smile. Then her eyes narrowed as she had another thought. "So what was all this then?" she asked. "A way to get revenge on Zev and me?" she asked.
"No," he said, stepping back and pulling his own tunic off, throwing it to the floor, then reaching down and pulling his pants up, though he didn't fasten them. He leaned forward, moving her pants out of the way in order to take off her boots, one after the other.
"No?" she asked, not convinced. "What then?"
He discarded her pants as well, and stood to help her off the table. She leaned over, pulling her smalls up. She looked back, "I need to clean the table before someone uses it."
Hawke leaned over, grabbing her pants, and throwing them over the table where she had been sitting. "There you go."
She gave him a look on consternation. "That is not a fix, and you haven't answered me."
He sighed, pulling her away from the table and into his arms. He nuzzled at her neck, hearing her sigh. "It's a good fix for now," he replied. "Anyone who sees it will wonder, and not use the table." He continued to pepper her with small kisses and nibbles, even as he led her out of the room. "And this was about hoping you still loved me enough that I could convince you to stay, even though I can't give you what you deserve."
She stopped, pushing him so that he stopped as well. She looked up at him, upset. "What exactly do you have in your head that you think I deserve that you can't give me?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips. "And where do you think I'm going?!"
Hawke stopped, looking down at her flushed face. She had gone from an aroused, pliant woman to an upset warrior in moments, and it delighted him.
"I think you deserve everything," he replied, and he watched as she softened a little. "And I am certain that I don't want to be a mage on the run with a wife and children being dragged along." He watched her face, seeing when she understood what he was saying.
"Who knows what may happen?" she said sadly, then shrugged. "But why not take what we can when we can?" she asked.
He smiled gently, pulling her into his embrace. "Maker, I love you, Cat," he murmured. "I've been so stupid in love with you for so long, that I just couldn't see it."
Her heart soared in absolute joy. "I love you Garrett, so much," she responded, burrowing into him. "More and more every day."
"I don't deserve you," he mumbled into her hair.
"No, but it's a good thing you don't have to," she replied, moving back and looking up at him with a smirk.
He grinned down at her. "Zev told me that you were going back to Ferelden with him," he said.
Her face went slack, then her anger rose. "HE WHAT?!" she demanded.
Hawke laughed, and she glared at him. "Did you make that up?" she poked her finger in his chest as she asked.
"No, that's what he implied," he answered. "But, I'm no longer upset."
"Well I am!" she retorted hotly.
"How can I be mad when he played me like a lute?" Hawke asked, grabbing her again, and spinning around with her. "And I'm the sucker that fell for it." He leaned forward and kissed her. "We wouldn't be here now if I hadn't felt I needed to fight in order to get you to stay."
"Well…" she replied grumpily. "that doesn't mean it makes it all right."
"True," he agreed, leaning her back slightly as he kissed her senseless. He reached down, and lifted her tunic off her in a smooth movement, throwing it onto the floor.
"What are you doing?" she asked, looking at her shirt on the ground.
"Letting others know to not disturb us," he replied, even as he moved her toward the stairs. He stopped at the base, and turned her. "Lift up your arms darling," he told her.
"Why?" she asked, even as she did. And he started unraveling her breast band. She covered herself as it came free.
"Why are you undressing me on the stairs?" she asked. He smiled, and gestured her up the stairs again. Reaching the top, he shook out the band, and tossed it on the stairs.
"Just putting out the warning signs dearest. I assumed you wouldn't want to have a visitor as Zev did last night," he smirked at her.
"Wait, are we doing it again?" she asked, her eyes wide.
"But of course," he answered smoothly. "I haven't nearly had my fill."
"But… but…" she said, "aren't you too tired?" she asked, and her looked at her incredulously, then down at himself. She followed his gaze down to his pants, and she smiled. "Really?" she asked in surprised pleasure.
"Really," he said in complete honesty, thinking again what a fool her husband had been. "I doubt I'll have had enough if I had you every moment of every day."
She gave him a shy smile, deeply moved. "Well then, I'll call your bluff," she replied, moving behind him and pushing him towards her room. "Now you'll have to prove it."
He stopped, and turned, picking her up and hauling her over his shoulder, then turning to move to her room. "Happy to, my love," he answered, running into the room, causing her to laugh.