A/N: This chapter is super short because I'm tired. Yes, last chapter was long and rambly because I was tired. There's no contradiction. I'm talking about different kinds of tired.
So then.
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Original Hidan
After finishing the book, he grew curious. The book said it was part of a series. Where was the rest of the series? He could not explain why, but something about Borowik's adventure appealed to him. There was no blood, no gore, hardly any epic battle, etc. In short, none of the things that he would have listed as requirements in order for him to like a story. Yet like this story, he did. He didn't want to admit it, so he snuck out to find the rest of the series on his own.
It was easy enough to ask one of the clones where vampire territory was. They didn't get even slightly suspicious. Heh, suckers. He headed straight in that direction, reasoning that the dolls wouldn't have followed roads. He found the burned tip of the branch. They definitely went this way. Following traces and intuition, he emerged from the weeds into the backyard of a falling-apart house. Alright, now to find the basement they broke into. They wouldn't have been subtle; they would have smashed a window or blown a hole in the wall. He looked for damaged basement windows. He soon found one. He slipped inside.
He was alone at first, but in just a few seconds a vampire appeared to challenge him. It stopped in its tracks. Hidan bared his teeth. "Back off, dead guy. I'm looking for something." He saw a bookshelf with colorful spines. He scanned it for any titles containing Misadventures or Wizards or any similar word or phrase, pulling out and scanning any book that qualified. The vampire, he ignored entirely.
It was not hard to ignore the vampire because it stayed out of his way and didn't speak a word. The cowardly thing clung to a corner of the room and watched him, obviously scared shitless. Hidan finally found a book that identified itself as another misadventure of the great wizard Borowik. "Alright! Fuckin' jackpot." The bookshelf was organized, with titles written by the same author kept in a single block. There turned out to be four other Borowik books, plus a scattering of standalone comedic adventures by the same author. Eh, what the hell. He took those too. If he hated them, he could just toss them at someone else. He held the stack under his left arm and turned to the vampire. "I like wizards blowing shit up, okay? Don't you even fucking dare judge me. Someone'll probably return these when I'm done with them. Maybe." He tossed the books out the window, then climbed out after them. He leaned down to say, "And don't give Konan any shit. She didn't authorize me. I'm a free agent. Relax your stupid fucking rules already." If the rest of this world is nice and cushy, why can't the vampires be? They should let me do whatever I want like everyone else does. Hah; he did just let me do whatever I wanted! I really don't get why the clones are so scared. Fuckin' pussies.
Clone Hidan
"Hey, have you seen my twin? He finished this book before me. I just finished it and I want to talk with him about it."
"No, sorry, hm," Deidara replied. "I just came back to get ready for my shift."
Hidan huffed. "I'll find him myself, then. Good luck."
He did not find his original, but he did find Konan and the other two originals discussing training battles. They stood on the road out front. Konan gestured down the road as she described the usual layout. "Heyo," he called. They turned. "Sorry to interrupt, but have any of you seen my twin?"
"No," Konan replied. "Is it urgent?"
Hidan held up the book. "He finished it before me and I want to know what he thought."
"Strange of him to get so invested in a book," Konan murmured.
"Well, what else is there to do around here? And this ain't a textbook; it's a book about a wizard blowing shit up. Who doesn't love that?"
"When you find him, ask him to get in touch with Kakuzu. Kakuzu is organizing another training battle."
Hidan saluted and walked away. Huh. He's not inside and he's not outside. Do I really need to search the whole fucking forest? I'd rather not. Maybe the dolls have a searching spell that can help. But he couldn't find the dolls, either. Where the fuck is everyone?!
"Hey Itachi, where'd the dolls go?"
Itachi turned on the blender and whizzed up his smoothie before replying. It only took a few seconds. "They followed the demon boy back to the hospital. Would you like a smoothie? It's peanut butter and banana."
Deidara ran in. "Is it ready yet?" Itachi looked at Hidan. Hidan nodded. Itachi poured three glasses. Deidara drank eagerly from one of them. "Nice, yeah! Found your twin yet?"
"Not yet. I'm hoping the dolls have a searching spell, 'cause otherwise I would need to search the whole forest."
"What do you need him for?" Itachi asked, sipping at his own glass.
Hidan repeated what he had already said twice, then drank down half oh his smoothie. "Hey, this is good shit."
"I often get the urge to talk about an experience of mine immediately after having it," Itachi said. "More often than not, it turns out to be a manifestation of my need to think about my experience further. Talking about it, explaining it, would be a form of processing. This desire does not really have anything to do with the other person and is best not indulged."
Hidan frowned at the book. "Maybe. I do have a lot of thoughts about it."
"Other Hidan'll definitely be back by tonight, right?" Deidara said. "If it's genuine, you'll still want to talk with him about it then, yeah."
"Yeah." Hidan put the book down. "Thanks."
"Have you heard the news?" Itachi asked. "Kakuzu is organizing training battles."
"Sasori's already signed up," Deidara said. "I've gotta get going, yeah. Catch you guys later?" They waved goodbye. He left.
Hidan checked the group chat. He saw that there was at least one battle definitely planned for Wednesday, and Sasori was definitely going to be involved. Kakuzu had floated the idea of making Original Hidan his opponent, supposedly for extra challenge. Hidan's ears pricked forward. Ooh, I see what he's getting at. Haha! Nice! Besides that, there was a lot of general enthusiasm but little solidly planned. A couple of people had resurrected the idea of a joke fight between Samehada and Konan. It was unclear what the status of that idea was. Besides Sasori (who hadn't actually sent a message at any point), nobody in the group chat was terribly eager to fight.
Hidan put his phone away and told Itachi, "You know what? I'm gonna polish some weapons." He left the kitchen and headed towards his room.
He caught his twin red-handed. Original Hidan lifted one leg out of the window and onto the floor, taking care not to step on any of the books scattered there. He snorted dismissively, as if he hadn't been caught at all. Nothing to see here, move along. Bullshit. Clone Hidan looked at the books as his original gathered them up. "Did you just fucking get back from breaking into a vampire's house?"
"I didn't break shit. The dolls broke that window yesterday."
"Was there a vampire there?"
"Yeah, but he just hid in a corner and didn't say anything."
Clone Hidan growled. "Because the vampires think people like us are violent bloodthirsty monsters with no conscience, something breaking into their fucking houses does not in any fucking way disprove!"
"What was I supposed to do? Not read the rest of the series?" Original Hidan waved another Borowik adventure in his clone's face. "As if you would resist."
"That is so not the fucking point!" Hidan was angry because his original was right. He totally would've finagled his way into getting the rest of the series. Probably by sending someone else in his stead, someone the vampires would find less objectionable, but he would've done it nonetheless.
"I'm already back."
Another good point. What was there to be angry about? Anger wouldn't change anything. Clone Hidan snatched one Borowik adventure off the stack, his original another. He read the back blurb. "Mine says Borowik finds his socks, but has to jump through more hoops to actually get them. You?"
"I got the first one, where he loses the socks."
"Swap when we're done?"
"Sure."
All argument was over. There was nothing to fight about. Anger, fear, and other such emotions had no purpose. In no time at all, both versions of Hidan had stretched out side by side on the floor, reading together. Like brothers.
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A/N: I have plot intentions for this story, but zero clue how to get there from here. I guess I'll just wait and see what happens. In the meantime, the characters get to chill and read books. It's a vacation. They deserve it.