A/N: Thank you for everyone who has read or reviewed! It means a world to me. :) Just in case you're wondering why Naruto's family is the way it is, they're Jehovah's Witnesses. Also I want to say, I don't want to portray any religious groups in a bad light or anything, as I know things are never black and white. The way Naruto's family is portrayed in here has to do with some real-life experiences, though.

CHAPTER 9: Are You Ashamed of Us?

That same evening Kankuro had gone to Kiba, Gaara had headed to Naruto's.

The place looked messy. Packets of instant noodles lay on the kitchen counter. The brand new stove was left unclean, and Naruto's clean underwear were now a large, messy pile on the chair in his bedroom.

"Sorry, it's been hectic lately," Naruto laughed, embarrassed.

But Gaara didn't mind. He walked to Naruto, and smoothed his chest, he was so tall. "I've missed you."

"Me, too," Naruto smiled warmly, shyly.

He was the man of his dreams, and oh how his golden locks shone in the evening light. Warm blue eyes shone like sapphire, a jewel of sovereigns.

"Let me clean up this place," Gaara suggested, and was again about to tighten up his nonexistent ponytail.

After the apartment was spotless again, Gaara set to prepare supper. Sandwiches with heart-shaped slices of cucumber and a dash of aioli mayo with sweet rooibos tea.

Naruto was speechless. "Move in with me," he half-joked.

Gaara only smiled at him serenely, before going back to household chores.

After supper, they were cuddling on the couch, the movie long forgotten still playing in the background. Their kisses were sweet, and he couldn't get enough of Naruto's handsome looks. He was a perfect man, god-like.

Their cuddling lead into something more, and he adored how Naruto gazed at him. Gently, lovingly, like there was no one else in the world. Gaara wanted him to touch his chest, but as there was nothing there, his bodily dysphoria strengthened again. Ignoring it, he made it his top priority to make this a beautiful memory for the both of them. Even if it made him feel unwell that the pleasure didn't feel where it should've feel in his body, and even if his lower parts were certainly not his, he decided to keep it as a secret, and not let it show.

He was dead scared that he wouldn't be able to come due to his bodily dysphoria, but thankfully, being with Naruto like this felt still so new and exciting, that he was able to fulfill expectations satisfyingly.

After the shower, they were cuddling in Naruto's bed. Naruto was caressing his cheek, gazing at him lovingly. It was a peaceful evening in a clean, sophisticated environment. Bookshelves were filled with books, and on one wall, there was an actual painting, not just a cheap poster.

"May I ask you something?" Naruto whispered, and now there was a hint of sorrow in his sapphire eyes again. "Your skin… the cuts."

"It's a long story. I'm okay. Nothing's wrong," Gaara said.

Naruto frowned. "But… They look really fresh."

Gaara lowered his gaze in shame. "Look, I wish you hadn't seen them. Please be kind."

"I remember you had cuts in high school. I thought it was long over," Naruto wondered.

"Don't dwell on it. Everything is alright," Gaara ended.

"If you say so," Naruto sighed worriedly, and pulled him into a warm embrace.

"Wake up, sweet angel. There's coffee," Naruto murmured in the morning, shower-fresh, smoothing down Gaara's locks.

"You're heaven-sent," Gaara mumbled sleepily, and as the scent of coffee wafted into his nose, his eyes opened.

Sleepily, he walked into the kitchen, only to see a pile of waffles on the table.

"You made these?" he asked, delighted. "I love waffles!"

Naruto grinned happily, and together, they enjoyed their peaceful Saturday morning.

The rest of the morning, Naruto was going through his old socks and throwing away the ones that had holes in them, or the ones whose pair was missing. In the kitchen, Gaara was going through the cabinets and arranging the kitchenware into a more logical order. One box was full of interesting, miscellaneous things that caught his attention.

Sitting on the floor, he admired the shiny corkscrew, a rusty Swiss army knife, and small plastic lids that seemed orphaned from their containers. With glee, he was playing with them, finding immense joy in the treasures he could find from the bottom of the box.

A deck of cards, a ballpoint pen with a pharmacy's logo on it, and a packet of children's band aids were to his specific liking. He admired the cartoon images imprinted on the bandaids, and took one out of the packet. Happily, he rolled up his sleeve, and put a bandaid on one of his wounds. He grinned, smoothing it down, admiring how cool it looked like.

When he heard Naruto coming, he suddenly snapped out of it, and got embarrassed. Hastily, he rolled down his sleeve again, and put the junk back into the box, out of sight.

"How's it going over here?" Naruto asked happily.

"Everything is in order here," Gaara showed around proudly.

Naruto was impressed. "What would I do without you?"

"Don't answer that," Gaara chuckled darkly, and put his finger against Naruto's lips, looking up at him gently.

Naruto smiled and kissed the finger, and Gaara pulled his hand off, and embraced the blond. He was so tall, so handsome, the man of his dreams. With infinite longing, Gaara snuggled even closer into the embrace, wanting to feel the warmth, the heartbeat, and the soulful connection.

"There's a funfair today in the town center. Would you like to go there?" Naruto invited.

"I'd love to," Gaara agreed, and kissed him.

Vendors of all sorts were scraped all over the town center, and curious villagers fiddled with the exotic pendants, colorful skirts, band T-shirts, studded belts, as well as a variety of plush toys. Several vendors were dedicated to selling sweets and cotton candy. In the center of the area, giant tea cups were flying with kids inside, and a pink piggy train crawled slowly on the tracks, carrying giggling toddlers.

Prizes were offered for those who could hit a bull's eye with darts, and those who were skilled enough to throw three balls through small hoops, were given a large teddy bear.

"Want me to collect a prize for you?" Naruto smiled playfully at Gaara.

"Thanks, I'll pass," Gaara responded, amused by his friend's idea. Once again, Naruto was his goofy old self again, and Gaara noticed himself enjoying it immensely.

"Besides, you wouldn't hit a bull's eye," Gaara quipped, secretly smirking.

"Hey! I totally would," Naruto defended, puffing up.

Gaara chuckled, amused by Naruto's reaction, and glanced at him with a challenging glint. Oh, how he enjoyed riling him up sometimes.

"Naruto, is that you?"

They both turned around to see a pink haired woman waving her hand at them modestly. Next to her, there stood a man with raven hair.

"Sakura Haruno!" Naruto gasped. "And Sasuke Uchiha…" the blond acknowledged quietly, his polite smile trembling.

"Nice to see you, Naruto," Sakura said, but her gaze lingered on Gaara, and her expression wasn't completely friendly. "And… you," she only addressed, and then looked away.

"Nice to meet you again, Sakura," Gaara greeted politely, weirded out about the tense atmosphere. It felt like Sakura was angry at him, but he couldn't figure out why. As far as he knew, the times the three of them had hung out together, he hadn't done anything hurtful towards her.

Sasuke noticed the vendor they were standing in front of. "I bet blondie can't hit the bull's eye."

"H-Hey," Naruto exclaimed, hurt.

"That's what I said, too," Gaara quipped, and Sasuke chuckled.

"I don't need to prove myself to you," Naruto huffed, crossing his arms.

"You're right," Sasuke agreed. "It's a safe choice when your aim is as good as nearsighted grandpa's."

Naruto gasped as his pride was hurt. Sasuke walked past him to the vendor, and asked for a dart. With ease, he hit the center, and chose a fluffy little cat plush as a prize. Gently, he gave it to Sakura, who accepted it with a warm, proud smile.

"Well?" Sasuke provoked the blond, "Aren't you going to catch a prize for your sweetheart as well?"

Naruto gasped and gritted his teeth, his hands balling up into fists. "We're just friends, Sasuke. Don't be so childish."

Sasuke looked surprised, but it was Sakura who cut in. "Naruto, it's you who is childish." Then, she glared at Gaara again.

"That's your opinion," Naruto quipped, "Come on, Gaara, we're gonna be late."

"Late for what?" Gaara was flabbergasted, but Naruto was already dragging him away.

Without saying a word, Naruto led them out of the funfair, and on they walked, until they were already in Naruto's neighborhood. Still fuming, Naruto let them in his home, and threw his keys on the hallway table.

Gaara slumped on the couch, his hands in his lap, head hung. Naruto was clanking something in the kitchen, he sounded angry. When he came to the living room, he was carrying two glasses and a bottle of wine.

"Be my guest," Naruto offered as he put the empty glass in front of Gaara, and filled his own glass. But Gaara didn't make a move.

"We're just friends," was all Gaara said, in a quiet voice.

Naruto sighed, and sipped his drink, frustrated. "Look, I didn't want to… in front of them. So soon… Look, I wasn't ready."

"Are you ashamed of me?" Gaara wondered, twiddling with his thumbs.

"No, of course I'm not," Naruto denied, but didn't look him in the eyes. "It's just… seeing the two of them together. It's still… not easy."

"Maybe we can give it a month or two, and then let them know," Gaara suggested shyly.

"Yeah… I don't know. I don't want to decide that right now," Naruto shook his head, and gulped his wine. He refilled his glass again.

"Hey, maybe slow down," Gaara was worried, and Naruto lowered his glass from his lips. There was that infinite sadness once again in the depths of his eyes. Gaara gazed at him softly, wishing he could cure it. With a sorrowful, apologetic look, Naruto sipped his wine, however.

"You don't know my life, Gaara. You don't know what it's like," Naruto muttered quietly, gripping his glass. "Your parents have passed away. You're free. They're not telling you what to do. Whatever you do, you can't disappoint them, because they're dead. You don't get it Gaara, what my life is like. Have you ever met those people? They're influential. You have no choice but to try to be in their good graces. You don't want to fall from grace. It would make your life very difficult, in a place like this. You don't get it, Gaara. If only you knew."

"Well, you're telling me now," Gaara responded gently, with sadness in his voice.

"You don't get it," Naruto repeated again, sipping more wine. "T-They loved Sakura, even if she or her family weren't in the congregation. Sometimes it feels like they loved her even more than me. They adored her. And I let her go. I failed. And I can't… I can't bring home…"

"Me?" Gaara finished the bitter thought. But Naruto didn't deny or confirm, instead he fell into his own little bubble, with a faraway look in his eyes.

Gaara sighed, and turned on the TV, just to escape the haunting silence of all the things they left unspoken.

He hugged his knees, he was small like a gastropod, his skin was a thick shell that shielded him from the energies dwelling in the room. The idea of Naruto being ashamed of him didn't awake any recognizable emotion in him. Instead, he felt a strange pain in his stomach. Ignoring it, he concentrated on the emotionless feeling in his head instead.

Gaara went to bed early, but Naruto didn't join him, he remained on the couch watching TV in his small little bubble.

In the middle of the night, Gaara woke up to Naruto coming to the bedroom. When he lay down on the bed, and the mattress sank, Gaara kept his eyes closed even though he was wide awake. His whole body felt tense, and the pain in his stomach moved upwards, into his chest.

A shiver of fright crossed Gaara's mind, and his body lay tense, his hands rigid, and he had a hard time relaxing. Naruto must've thought he was asleep, as he didn't hug him.

The next morning, Gaara woke up early to make some coffee. Naruto was still snoozing, and given how the bottle of wine on the living room table was empty, he would be having a headache once he woke up.

Feeling sorry in advance, Gaara looked up the painkillers from the cabinet, and left them on the kitchen table.

In the quiet of the morning, Gaara held his coffee cup and gazed out of the window. Naruto's foster-parents were familiar to him, but never had he imagined what they might think, if Naruto would seriously bring him home as his spouse. In Gaara's opinion, they had always been nice and polite towards him.

He knew they were Jehovah's Witnesses, and that from time to time, Naruto went to the Kingdom Hall with them, but they never really talked about it.

Long time ago, Gaara remembered Naruto telling about a girl in his class, whose family was Jehovah's Witnesses as well. Apparently, something serious happened — what exactly, had escaped Gaara's memory — leading to the girl being disfellowshipped. With a hushed voice, Naruto had told him that because of that, she had lost all contact with her whole family and friends, and she had had absolutely no one to turn to. She had been left all alone, and even her parents had refused to talk with her after that.

Even today, Gaara remembered the fright and seriousness Naruto had told the story with. It was an odd thing, and it made him wonder if Naruto's orphanage had anything to do with it.

"Ah, hell," Naruto whispered sharply, and held his head.

In an instant, Gaara was there with a pill and a glass of water. "Here, take this."

"Thanks," the blond murmured, and slumped back in the bed.

As he looked at Naruto, Gaara felt the pain in his body coming back. Tension traveled from his fingers to his chest, to his hips, turning him into a tree trunk about to snap.

Forcedly, he retreated from the bedroom and found ease on the balcony. He was 'just a friend'. What they did when the curtains were closed, was a secret. It had to be shameful, if no one could know. It had to be wrong, punishable, if it had to be kept behind closed doors.

Feeling dizzy, Gaara sat on the rattan chair and imagined the things he did with his own brother. What kind of a criminal would he be in the world's eyes, if light was ever shed on his darkest secrets? What would his own, long dead parents, say?

A part of him knew they would turn in their graves, and lose sleep for all eternity. And he wondered, what would Naruto say?

Shivering, Gaara closed his eyes and let himself drift away from it all. A part of him had never done it with his own brother. That part was clean. It was protected.

"Hey, Gaara," Naruto smiled weakly, as he found the redhead on the couch in the living room, reading a book. Gaara put the tome away, expectant.

"I was thinking…" Naruto started, ashamed. "About yesterday. I'm so sorry about how I behaved at the funfair. I was dishonest, and I hurt your feelings. I never meant to do that, yet I did. I'm sorry. You would have deserved better."

Gaara shrugged, with a quick smile, "These things happen. It's alright."

There was that wistful look in the blue eyes again, that vivid sorrow and longing that lived there permanently. "Gaara… Would you move to the city with me?"

"No," Gaara panicked, opening his book again, "You know I can't leave Kankuro behind. He needs me. You know his health has gotten worse lately again."

"I know," Naruto understood, as if he had been waiting for Gaara's reaction. "In the city, you and I could blend in better. We could live together, and I could have a better-paying job in a more open-minded office."

"What would your foster-parents say?" Gaara squinted, gripping his book.

Naruto lowered his gaze, and tried to smile. "I could tell them that we're roommates, because the rent is higher in the city. They would believe it. They know you, Gaara, they would understand."

"But they wouldn't want me as their son-in-law?" Gaara shot.

"Look. Please don't make this difficult. I hope you understand," Naruto pleaded.

Gaara turned his gaze away in anger. A part of him knew that it wasn't completely Naruto's fault, but a part of him was infuriated that the blond wouldn't stand up for their love. Was their relationship really that insignificant to him?

"Gaara, I love you," Naruto reminded him.

"As a friend?" Gaara wondered.

"No, as my little sweetheart," Naruto corrected, with a smile. "You're the most precious person to me. Like a jewel I put on a velvet pillow and locked up in the chest of my heart."

Gaara rolled his eyes, but smiled good-heartedly anyway. The pain in his chest began to dissolve, and his arms lost their earlier tension. Naruto sat down next to him, and pulled him into a warm embrace. Sun peeked from between the curtains, and in that moment, Gaara felt safe in their secret nest.