I don't own these characters; Disney/ABC does.

8: The Fantastic Pet

"You might quite possibly be the dumbest person I know," Ruby said to Emma as they stood in Emma's tiny, plain room at the B&B. There was hardly enough room for the full bed and dresser. So small and almost forgotten by its owners, no paintings or decorations of any kind hung on the pale green walls. This was where she would be staying and working until she got a real job with a real paycheck and was able to afford a real apartment.

Emma arched an eyebrow. "Would a dumb person use her one connection to end up with cheap room and board as well as a job?" She hit Ruby with finger guns.

"You could've been a handyman-slash-dishwasher without the damn GED. Granny would've hired you without all this nonsense."

Emma's heart clenched and her throat was tight for a long moment. "My GED is nonsense?"

"You know damn well that's not what I mean. You left fine-ass Regina and her sweet-ass house for our bullshit!" Ruby scoffed, throwing her head to the side for added effect.

"I didn't leave fine-ass Regina. I am still totally her Duckling." No way she would give up cuddles, kisses, and food. Not to mention, she would never give up being around Regina. It was the best feeling ever.

"Bro, you left damn paradise to room in the smallest room in the B&B. It's damn near a closet."

Emma arched an eyebrow. "You do realize I used to live in an actual closet, right?" She had told Ruby about her nest on a few occasions.

Ruby was not swayed, making a face. "Only if you wanted to. You said you've slept in her bed before."

Emma stuck her tongue out. "Because she was humoring me! She likes to humor me." It was always amazing when she did it, but it still did not mean anything deep.

Ruby covered her face with both hands and blew out a long breath. "You're so stupid." She dropped her hands and regarded Emma as if she was out of her mind. "Your entire freaking relationship is her humoring you, letting you guys get close and be silly together. That's the whole damn point of you being a pet. Like, how are you this dumb? Am I getting dumber from hanging around you?"

Emma glared at Ruby. "If we weren't so damn close, I might be a little hurt you keep insisting I'm stupid. I know how things work with Regina. I'm trying to make things less one-sided." Why did Ruby not understand that?

"I'm ready to check you for head injuries because what the hell? You had a good thing and you left. Why the hell would you leave?" Ruby threw her hands in the air and puffed out her cheeks.

"Because I need her to see me as more than a stupid pet!" Emma's arms launched out to each side her. This was not a difficult concept, yet Ruby refused to accept it. "I need her to see I can be an equal partner to her if and when she needs me to. I mean, yeah, this pet shit is cool, but I need her to be able to rely on me when things get rough."

Ruby rubbed her forehead. "Um… couldn't you do that from her house?"

Emma pinched the bridge of her nose. "No, because she's just going to keep pampering me."

"Yeah, but if something came up, you could just, you know, step up while still being home. You'd be able to pamper her back. You can offer to pay a bill or something at the house."

Emma snarled, blood on fire. "Shut up. You don't get it. Regina said it was okay. She's supporting me."

Ruby tilted her head and pulled her mouth to one side. "Sure she's not spoiling you?"

Somehow, this made Emma laugh. Ruby knew how to diffuse her as much as she knew how to rile Emma up. "You're an ass."

Ruby shrugged. "And you're stupid. I'm assuming that's why we're friends."

Emma chuckled. "You suck, dude."

Ruby gave her a playful push. "You suck, dude. Make sure you at least look for a real job. You can't support a woman that classy washing dishes and doing odd jobs around here."

Emma nodded. "Gonna do my best." She did not leave her home to fuck around, after all. She would do everything in her power to claw her way to a level where she could dare offer herself up as a partner for Regina.

"You're still dumb as hell." Ruby shoved her again.

Emma gave her a light punch in return. "You'll be the dumb one when Regina is really my girlfriend. The second we make it official, I'm gonna come rub it in your stupid face."

Ruby rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. You could've done that from her house, but whatever." She made a useless waving gesture with both hands. "You wanna be a real adult. I told you adulthood sucks."

Emma snorted. Ruby might never understand it. At least Regina got it, blessed it, and would wait for her to get it together. That was what mattered.

-8-8-8-8-

Regina had to go to the cafe. She tried to go to work, tried to be the mayor. It was impossible today. She needed to do something to lift her spirits.

Last night, Regina helped Duckling pack to move out and it gutted her to the point it still felt like she was dragging her entrails behind her. Yes, it was helpful to watch Duckling only take clothes from her nest, leaving behind all of her pet enrichment items. A silent promise she would be back, but packing the clothes away to help her leave was sheer agony, like peeling her skin as if she were a ripe banana. Regina was not sure she would ever recover.

So, as a distraction and a more appealing situation than dealing with difficult morons, Regina was at Two Witches Out of the Fire. She did not have anything to do, but it was easy to find something. She helped Maleficent in the back, mostly working on biscuits and dumplings for the lunch rush. That all stopped when Tinker Bell poked her head in the back.

"Regina, a lady is demanding for you to come out and I don't think she's going to leave until you do," Tink said. "She doesn't look friendly."

"Who the hell even knows I'm here?" Regina had not even known she would be there until she pulled up in front of the place. She was not in the mood to deal with people, which was why she left Town Hall. She was ready to chew someone down to their insoles.

"The entire town probably. Tink's made herself our social media manager," Maleficent replied.

Regina scowled. "You posted that I was here?"

Tink made a face and threw her hands up. "We always end up with more customers when people find out you're here! Sue me for bringing in more business!"

Regina shook her head. "We'll discuss this later." She marched out to the counter and was surprised who awaited her. "Marian?" Robin's wife and the reason he left Regina. What did she want?

"So, you are willing to face me," Marian said as an accusation, as if Regina had dodged her at some point.

"Why wouldn't I be willing?" She never had a problem with Marian. She barely knew Marian, beyond what Robin or Roland told her. according to both of them, Marian was the best of women. So, why was she here now wasting both of their time?

Marian frowned. "You're quite comfortable going behind my back, picking up my scraps. First, my husband, then my ex-girlfriend, and now my husband again."

Regina tilted her head. "Excuse me?" What the hell is she going on about? "I don't want anything to do with your damn husband and I haven't seen your ex-girlfriend in weeks." The last time she was in Mulan's presence was to inform her she ate free at the shop.

"Yet she's in here every day." This was said as an accusation for some reason.

"You appear more knowledgeable about it than I do." Regina appreciated the knowledge that Mulan took her up on the offer. It was the least she could do for Mulan.

"And you refuse her money."

Regina shrugged. She was certainly up to date on her ex's life after her. Regina made it a point to not keep up with Robin. Almost all of the information she came across about him was against her will. People at work mentioned him on occasion, mostly trying to trick her into talking about him for whatever reason, like she was meant to care.

"She eats free here," Regina said as if it was nothing, as it was that. "It has nothing to do with you. Just like your husband can't eat here. Nothing to do with you. You mean nothing to me." This was not a lie. Regina never thought of Marian.

The fire in Marian's eyes did not disappear. "You've already lured Mulan away. Why the hell would you want Robin, too? As a way to make me miserable? What have I ever done to you?"

It took a lot for Regina to keep up with the short list of complaints. It was not a lot, but it was deep and heavy. What was going on in Marian's life for her to assume Regina wanted either of these people? Not to mention, what made her think who Mulan spent her time with was any of her concern when she was with Robin yet again?

"First off, what would it matter what I've done with Deputy Hua?" Regina countered. "She's your ex and allowed to move on, like you're allowed to move back. Second off, I was with Robin during your separation. He had someone, you had someone. What makes any of this about you? I wasn't aware of your existence until Robin said something."

Marian gasped, like that was an insult. "And yet you want my scraps."

Regina scowled, head pounding from this interaction. This was Hell. "I don't want anything from you beyond you leaving this establishment." She nodded to the door, in case Marian needed a hint along with the blunt statement.

"I'm not leaving without answers."

Regina folded her arms across her chest, body taut, ready for action. "Is that so?"

The air was tense and charged, lightning practically crackling between them, even though this whole situation was ridiculous and pointless. Marian did not back down and did not break eye contact. Regina pressed a foot forward. The bell over the door rang out. No one moved.

"Marian!" Deputy Hua appeared at Marian's side, hands on Marian's shoulders. Her face was stern, but not unkind. The redness of her cheeks suggested she rushed over here, possibly running from the station.

Marian turned, facing Mulan. "Mulan, of course, you're here. I'm told you're here every day and you eat free."

"While both of those are true, it's far from your business, I've already been here. I get breakfast in the morning. What I don't understand is why you're here," Mulan answered.

"Because of this woman!" Marian pointed at Regina as if trying to call down thunder and lightning on her. "I'm tired of this woman trying to take everyone who matters from me. My husband, my son, you!"

It took all of Regina's self-control not to jump back in. This was not her fight, despite the fact that Marian brought a battle to her door. Still, she would stick around in case Marian wanted to attack her again.

"She hasn't taken any of those things. Roland has always been your son. You and your husband parted ways before Regina met him to my understanding of things. You…" Deputy Hua took a deep breath and kept her voice steady. "You decided against me."

"I…" Marian shook her head and then her shoulders dropped. Her eyes went to the floor for a moment, searching for answers nowhere to be found. "I don't know what I'm doing."

Deputy Hua pulled Marian close, holding her around her shoulders. "You're picking a fight with a woman who doesn't deserve it. Let me take you home."

"I don't…" Marian shook her head once more.

"Let me take you home." It was whispered this time and Deputy Hua directed Marian toward the door. And like that, it was over.

"They recorded this, you know." Regina stared out at the customers, despising them at this moment. She had become a show to them.

Tinker Bell had the nerve to grin her face. "Living up to the witch title."

"I hate this," Regina hissed. Her dream was a joke. She was a joke. And Duckling was gone. What was even the point? She left, ignoring Tinker Bell calling after her. Later, she would force Tink to shut down the damn social media until Maleficent intervened and had Tink limit what she posted.

-8-8-8-8-

Emma rushed to Two Witches Out of the Fire, eyes frantically scanning the area. Her heart hammered in her chest and her blood rushed, clawing its way through her body. Her nerves were on edge.

Regina was not there, of course. She probably went to work after that nonsense with Robin's wife. Tinker Bell smiled at Emma as soon as she got to the counter.

"She left five minutes ago. She was fine. Nothing happened," Tink said.

"You're kidding, right? Do you realize how damn embarrassing this has to be for her? She knows people show up when she's here because they expect this type of bullshit now. She just wants to be left in peace to enjoy this place," Emma replied with a growl. Why would Tink do something she knew would make life hard for Regina?

Tink dared to pout. "It's not that serious."

Emma needed to be in Tink's face for her to get the full effect of Emma's fury. "It's more than that serious. This place is everything to her!"

Tink was unaffected and motioned around with a flick of her fingers. "And it's a success. People like coming in to witness her being around."

Emma glared at Tink like she was the enemy. It took so much control not to put her fist through something. "You don't fucking get it. And I don't have time to argue this bullshit with you. Stop setting her up like this."

Now, Tink was bothered. Her face tensed and she folded her arms across her chest. "Believe it or not, I posted she was here because I know she likes this place and I want people to see she likes her place as much as she does. I'm not trying to be an asshole. Yes, I realize it's going to bring in the crazies, but that makes this place more popular. It gets people to sample the goods and they come back for that, not the drama."

Emma shook her head. "Whatever you tell yourself." Then, she left.

At first, she thought it was cute that Tink had posted the picture of Regina at Two Witches. It showed her entering the door with the caption "The Queen has returned." But, it turned into bait. When Emma noticed the uptick in reactions, she knew. She thought it was Robin, but it was his wife. It did not matter. It was still embarrassment for a woman who did not deserve it, in a place she did not deserve it.

Emma drove to Town Hall next. She was pretty sure that was where Regina worked. She never bothered to think about it and now that she was there, how was she supposed to check on the damn mayor? Not that it mattered. Regina's car was not in the parking lot. It had not been at Two Witches either. Where else to try?

Home was the next logical choice. Regina's car was in the driveway. This would be so much cooler if I didn't have to knock. Knock she did, anyway. Loud, but only a couple of times. She did not want to be obnoxious about it. It did not matter. No answer.

"Regina, please!" Emma knocked again. It took a few seconds, but she heard footsteps.

"Duckling?" The door opened.

"Regina!" Emma threw her arms around Regina before the door even fully opened. Regina grunted and a glass shattered. Emma winced and did not look down. "You were holding a drink, huh?"

"I think I deserve one this morning. Let me guess, you watched that foolishness on social media?" Regina asked.

"I didn't see what happened really. Just once I saw you were involved, I went to Two Witches right away. I'm so sorry she upset you," Emma said.

"It's not that, Duckling. It's been a difficult day."

"It's ten in the morning." What the hell happened beyond that in two hours?

"And I need another drink." Regina turned, going back inside. Emma did not let her go, following her in. She kicked the door shut behind them.

Emma was not sure what to make of Regina's morning drinking. She had not seen this happen, but then again, she had not been around the last time Regina was really upset. She had been thrown out of the house at the time. Don't think about that. Think about how you can fix this like you fixed it before.

They went to the sofa. There was a bottle on the coffee table. "Cider?" Regina pointed to the bottle before going to grab a glass.

"No." Was cider even alcoholic? Emma had no idea.

"You're missing out. I make it myself from the apples from the tree in the back." Regina returned with a glass and poured herself a full glass of cider. She collapsed on the couch, still in her work clothes.

"You okay?" Emma asked as she sat down next to Regina.

"Duckling, I'm drinking at ten-thirty in the morning after going to play in the kitchen rather than remaining at work. I think you know the answer to that question." Regina's voice was dry, almost devoid of emotion, except for a hint of sorrow.

That was true enough. Emma laid her head in Regina's lap. It always made Regina feel better. Or maybe it makes me feel better. It did not matter. Regina ran her fingers through Emma's hair almost as soon as her head was down. Emma sighed.

"She thinks I've stolen Robin from her. I never want to bear witness to that man again," Regina said.

Emma nodded. "I know. Why does she think you stole him?"

Regina took a sip of her drink. "I'm not sure, beyond the fact that their relationship seems to be failing, which might have something to do with his business failing. She also thinks I've stolen the deputy from her, but Deputy Hua hasn't spoken to me since I offered her free meals at Two Witches."

"She comes in every day, though. Loves the food. She gets oatmeal, letting Tink throw in whatever she thinks Mulan might like that day. And she likes trying a pastry each time if she can. She fights Tink over tipping. I think it's on the social media page a couple of times."

Regina drank a little more. "Fond memories?"

A small smile settled on Emma's face. "It was fun."

"She came to save Marian from herself, so I have to assume she saw the videos as customers recorded something that wasn't even serious."

"People suck." That would always be true.

"That they do, Duckling." Regina took a deep drink from her glass. "That they do." She looked worn down with lines under her eyes and her eyes empty.

"You need me to do anything?" Emma asked. She would do anything to push Regina out of this funk.

"You're doing it now. You're here."

"I'll always be here for you, Regina. Always."

"You've moved out."

"And yet here I am, like I said I would be. You can trust me, Regina." She hugged Regina around her middle. "This is where I want to be, always and forever."

"But, you're not here. You left." The words were both damaged and damaging.

Emma's stomach twisted. "You know why." It was damn hard to walk out with her bags that morning, but she did it.

Emma should have felt stronger for making it out, but there was something brittle about her entire being now. If someone tapped too hard on her, she might crumble a bit, but manage to hold together through force of will. She needed to do this, so that the next time Regina was upset, she would be able to hold her in a warm embrace until everything was better.

"Yes, I am aware of the reasons. Doesn't make it hurt any less." Regina drank more. The glass was already damn near empty.

"I'm sorry." What else was there to say? Emma wanted to make things better, but she could not come back and put things back the way they were. Things needed to change. She needed to change. They needed to be changed.

"Don't apologize. You deserve a chance to better yourself. I…" Regina sighed, shaking her head. "I enjoy a good pity party." And the drink was gone.

Emma was unsure if she had ever seen Regina indulge in a "pity party." Regina was a woman of action. She dominated space and took charge. Emma was not sure what to make of this. She can't be so upset that I moved out. I'm gonna be back. I'm gonna be here. I'm gonna be better. Beyond that, she was just a pet. Regina should not be ready to collapse into herself because of Emma… right?

"Your emotions are understandable," Emma said as gently as she was capable. "I'm not leaving you, though. And I hurt like hell, too. But, I want to come out of the other side to be a proper partner for you, to you. I want to be someone you can rely on, beyond cuddles." Emma smiled.

Regina stared into her glass before putting it down. "I want you to be able to confidently go out into the world and be able to live comfortably, not just survive. You deserve that. Do this for you."

"I am." Just doing it for Regina, too. Regina made her stronger. The thought of Regina would help her through any hardships.

"Then, it's enough."

Emma was not sure if that was true, not with Regina day-drinking. No matter what, she needed to do this, though. It hurt now, but things would be so much better when it was all said and done. Until then, though, she held Regina and kept her head in Regina's lap.

-8-8-8-8-

Regina was back at work. Soon, the election would be upon them and she would count her days until she was free of this wretched place. If Kathryn Midas managed to win, which should be the case, Regina might fill her time with acting as a mentor, as Kathryn seemed open to the idea. Beyond that, she wanted to be a fixture at Two Witches, so people stopped taking her as a sign of high drama.

Before Regina ended up lost in her thoughts, her door opened. Deputy Hua stepped in. Regina arched an eyebrow.

"Deputy," Regina said.

Deputy Hua smiled. "Madam Mayor."

"Please, Regina."

"Then I insist you call me Mulan." She stepped deeper into the office, closing the door behind her.

"Come, sit." Regina motioned to the chair in front of her.

Mulan nodded and took the seat. "I'm here about Marian."

"I assumed that was the case."

"I want to apologize for her. She's been under stress, having come to the realization things won't work out between her and Robin. She wanted her family to stay whole, didn't want Roland to grow up apart from his parents."

Sometimes, it was probably better for the children if the marriage failed. Regina used to imagine a life where her father divorced her mother, took her and Zelena, and they lived their lives happily far away from Mother. Daddy never would have dared.

"Didn't want to fully admit she's attracted to women," Regina added. She was aware of how that might go, confusing, assuming to be one thing, and then discovering more about herself.

Mulan gave a small smile. "It's hard."

"I am aware, being bi doesn't make it any easier."

"Yes, but you didn't deserve to be attacked like that in your place of business, especially since nothing she said was true."

Regina held up a hand. "Never mind me. How are you feeling through that mess? I'm sure it wasn't easy for you and you came to her rescue."

Mulan gave a small smile. "Despite how things ended with us, I still have feelings for her and she's so much better than she showed in that moment. My coworkers were watching one of the videos and laughing at her, at you. Neither of you deserves that. Neither of you deserves to be treated as entertainment."

"You might be the only decent person in this god-forsaken town. Marian was a fool to let you go." Regina meant that as much as a person could mean a statement.

Mulan shook her head. "Please, don't. As I said, I still have feelings for her. I could've easily spent the rest of my life with her."

"And are you here to apologize for her?"

Mulan shook her head. "I was hoping I might arrange for her to apologize to you personally. I've explained to her the setup you made for me and why. She explained to me what happened with Robin. You might see more of him from now on."

Regina groaned. "Exactly what I don't want or need. He had his wife back. Why bother me?"

Mulan shrugged. "Why bother anyone? He's a miserable man and wants to make others miserable. He spent every moment with her comparing her to you instead of trying to salvage their relationship."

Regina massaged both temples with her hands. "Yet he spent every moment of our relationship waiting for her to take him back."

Mulan put her hands up. "I cannot explain him and have little desire to try. I can only explain her and I would rather she do that. It would be best for both of you. If you'll let her."

Regina rubbed the bridge of her nose. "I'll do this as a favor to you, but I don't really need her personal apology. I more need her to understand I have no desire for Robin and no designs for you or Roland therefore she doesn't need to come yell at me ever again."

"Still."

"I already said I would do it, Deputy. But, in return, I will offer my advice, think long and hard before you take her back."

Mulan frowned. "Who said anything about taking her back?"

Regina was not surprised Mulan did not comprehend what was coming. "She's possessive of you. She still has feelings for you and Robin clearly couldn't cut it. Roland was very fond of you from what I remember, which has to mean a lot to her. And above all, you are good and decent. She will want you back. Don't just jump into her arms. You deserve someone good and decent as well."

Mulan nodded. "I will think long and hard on it, but I'm sure she's not interested in coming back. She thought we moved too fast, that she moved too fast."

"I'm sure she was more overwhelmed by what she felt for you than anything else." Regina was more than aware of how that could sneak up on someone. She had not been looking to have all of these emotions and feelings for Duckling, yet there they were.

"I'm not sure, but I will heed your advice."

"Then, I'll have this sit down with Marian. And, also, let me thank you once again for being helpful toward me."

Mulan shook her head. "You don't deserve to be used as entertainment and you don't deserve to be yelled at for things that have nothing to do with you."

"You are amongst a low few who believe so. When and where would like to do this little meet and greet?"

"I was actually hoping to do it at Two Witches. I think she'd like your place and I'm sure she'd like to bring Roland when she gets a feel for the place and he'd like that."

Regina nodded. She would like to see Roland again. He would enjoy Two Witches, finding a treat he would want every day. It would give her something to do with her time as well.

"Tomorrow?" Mulan asked.

"Sounds good," Regina answered.

They shook on it and with that, Mulan left. Regina finished up working and went home, her pounding. Would Duckling be there? She feared the answer. And her fear was correct. The house was empty, like her soul.

The sensation was not something she could describe, but the absence of Duckling was accurate. It was pins in her lungs, paining every breath. Razors down her nerves and scratches in her belly, like she was being shredded from the inside out. More than that, it was a gnawing at the back of her mind that she would never be good enough. She would never be enough.

She took a shower to distract herself. Returning downstairs after, she discovered Duckling, trying to arrange takeout like a fancy meal on the coffee table. The grey clouds in her body parted and the sun shined on her heart. Liquid rainbows of joy flowed through her veins.

Duckling smiled. "I got us dinner. Can't afford anything too fancy, but I also feel like you've never had proper beef and broccoli, so this should still be a great experience for you."

Regina chuckled. "I do believe you're right. Is this what you spent your first paycheck on?"

Duckling shrugged. "I might have gotten a little advance for this."

Regina shook her head. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Sit and eat." Duckling's smile became a grin and she patted the space next to her. Regina was unable to not refuse that offer.

-8-8-8-8-

Next time: Regina sits down with Marian and Emma gets her friends' advice on taking Regina out.