Last time: Sasha blew up at RV. There is something wrong.

Now: What's going on with Sasha?

Chapter 21- Somethings Going On

A relatively uneventful week went by after they returned with the X-Wings and Cien's new robes. But ever since they returned, Viran had noticed Sasha acting strangely. Especially after her outburst in the living room that seemed so out of character, and the incident with RV in the kitchen. And they hadn't been the only confusing moments. Over the week, Sasha had been exuding strange reactions and behavior towards the smallest of things. No one quite knew why or where this came from and if anyone asked her, she would just shrug off as if nothing was wrong. There was the assumption that this sudden behavior change might have had something to do with the strange encounter with the seamstress. But Viran suspected that this was something that had been going on for longer than that. The question was, though, what had caused the sudden mood shift?

Viran had a few theories as to what it might be, but as the days passed, they were slowly being debunked. So he played coy and kept an eye on her throughout the week, hoping for any sign of what was causing her attitude. Right now, though, Viran was in the hangar sorting through paint samples absent-mindedly as Kyr was setting up the gear to paint the X-Wings. Cien was in the nursery, getting it ready and Sasha was… somewhere. He could sense her in the house, but had no real clue of where she was as she was blocking even him out of their bond and that worried him. He just wished he knew what was wrong.

His distracted mindset was interrupted when he realized that he almost mixed the blue and gold paint samples into the paint cup. Setting the paint aside, Viran sighed and hunched over on the stool, his face in his hands.

"I know you liked the idea of green, but I don't think they would mix into a very nice shade of it." Kyr said, coming over. "Everything okay?"

Viran looked up at him through his fingers. He groaned quietly and dropped his hands, looking down. "I don't know. I'm just… distracted at the moment."

"Sasha?" Kyr asked quietly.

"Yeah," Viran nodded.

"Have you talked with her to figure out if it's something we could help with?" Kyr asked.

"I've tried," Viran said, straightening up. "But everytime I ask her to tell me what is going on, she immediately gets defensive and says nothing is wrong. She is pushing me away from whatever is actually wrong."

Kyr grabbed one of the others stools and wheeled it over to Viran, settling down and rubbed his right leg absently. "Sasha's not one to tell anyone if something is wrong. Especially if you ask her about it." He observed quietly. "I've been trying to think back to if there was something that made her upset. I was thinking that trip to Corsin when they met that seamstress lady, but I feel like even before that there was an odd tension." Kyr said, thinking.

"I wondered about it too. I've had many theories on what's going on, but none of them seem to… work," Viran said, exasperated. "And I know how she is. I have for as long as I have known her. But this feels different. Her reactions to everything seem so different than what I expect when she is hiding things." He paused for a moment. "What do you think it could be?"

"Well, when did it start?" Kyr asked, trying to remember. "There were a few odd little moments with Sasha, like when we met them in the store looking for baby things. And a little of it when Cien was talking about going to the conference." He observed, trying to think back to the small moments that he had been concerned about her for seeming absent or annoyed. And realized all of them were sort of when Cien was in the room. Granted, if he had been talking with Sasha, Cien had been there as well, since his wife was usually with him or her sister, or both.

"I'm not entirely sure, but if I had to guess it was around the time you and Cien started working on the nursery," Viran guessed. "I only say that as I noticed the same things you have, but I can't figure out what out of all of that is causing her to act like this."

Kyr thought back, trying to remember what that might be related to. He and Cien had started working on the nursery, their nursery since Lana still had hers over in the other wing, a couple of weeks ago. Since Cien's pregnancy had started showing, since it had all started seeming so real. He tried to remember back to when they had helped with Lana's nursery, and realized he hadn't been there for that. The others had set all of that up while he and Cien had been off taking care of Ikari before they returned home. "What were things like when you guys were setting up Lana's nursery?" He asked Viran.

"Kitsu and Illara primarily set it up. I helped occasionally, but most of the time I was helping Tac and Oppie fix the security in case Ikari showed. Sasha helped them too, but I don't remember her doing much. Mainly just telling them what she wanted and looked for in the room," Viran tried to remember.

"That must have grated on her to no end." Kyr observed. Cien was in the same situation, but she'd been in a position of authority over others all her life and, admittedly, was kind of used to being in more of a supervisory role of such work.

"She didn't seem to be bothered by it," Viran shrugged. "The only thing that bothered her is that they wouldn't let her help build anything or paint or lift a finger. She was still on order by the med droid and Reya to be on bedrest. Especially after what happened with Ikari." He explained. "Do you think it could be related to the twins?"

Kyr furrowed his brow in thought. "How so?" He asked.

"I don't think it is, but it does seem rather strange that her reactions always seem to be around Cien and right now she is focused on the twins and that conference," Viran guessed. "If I had to actually guess, it would make more sense that this is connected to the conference than the twins. She is beyond excited to meet them."

"Do you think it's reminding her of Cien being a Sith, and everything that entailed?" Kyr asked quietly.

"It's possible, but it seems like Sasha isn't phased by that anymore," Viran said, thinking about it. "Unless it still bothers her, but I seriously doubt it. Maybe…" He added that last part under his breath. "I don't know." He leaned forward, putting his head in his hands again.

"What?" Kyr asked.

Viran was quiet for a moment. "What if it's both?" He suggested as the thought came to mind. He hated the idea, but for some reason it made way more sense than anything else did.

"What do you mean?" Kyr asked, not quite sure where he was going.

"Think for a second about everything that is going on in Cien's life right now," Viran started. "She is expecting children in a situation where she doesn't have to worry about an outside threat. She is invited to go to a conference on Coruscant of all places to talk about what it was like to be a Sith. And she just got new robes that make her look like a more dignified version of her old self. A person Sasha might still have bad memories of facing. When you lay it all out, it makes sense as to why Sasha would be upset. It's stirring a lot of emotions for her." He guessed. "Does that make sense or am I just overthinking this?" He asked him, looking up from his hands.

Kyr thought about it for a second and shook his head. "No, that makes total sense." He admitted.

"But Sasha isn't the jealous type. That's the only thing that isn't selling me on this," Viran added.

"Would it have to be jealousy, though?" Kyr asked. "If it's reminding her of all these painful memories she buried but didn't put behind her, all the things that she kind of missed out on with Lana that Cien's getting to have, it wouldn't need to be jealousy towards Cien to be upset by it. Just painful reminders of what she didn't get to have."

Viran looked down. "No, it wouldn't be then." He frowned. "I feel bad if this is the case. I had no idea that this bothered her. If it even does bother her."

"Yeah, we don't really know for sure." Kyr said with a grimace. "And trying to talk with her about it to see if that is the case, it feels like she'd just button up more about it." He said. "Heck, she might not even realize what she's feeling off about. If it's that, she might not realize it's why she's acting so... irregular." He finished in quiet observation.

"That's possible," Viran said. He looked at Kyr. "What should I do? I want to help her, but…" He trailed off.

"Yeah." Kyr said, not sure what to suggest. "You'd know better than anyone. If we ask her about it head on, though, I feel like she'll just be stubborn about it. Maybe you could talk with her about it from a different angle?"

"That's a thought," Viran said with a nod. "I could try that, yeah. And once I figure it out, I'll let you know. Cause maybe there is something we can all do to help her or something."

"Yeah." Kyr said, nodding.

"Thanks, Kyr," Viran said, smirking. "This has been bothering me for a while. Thanks for helping me try and figure it out."

"No problem Sport, she's my little sister too." Kyr observed with a small, troubled smile.

He nodded, noting the troubled smile and looked down to the paint cups. He then cleared his throat. "So… should we test out the paint?" Viran asked, changing the subject.

"Yeah, let's." Kyr said, getting up.

Cien walked down the hallway towards the training room with two mugs in hand. Hers, with her tea to try to keep her stomach in check, and the other with hot chocolate in it, using Sasha's secret chocolate chips. She also had two cookies with her, albeit they were not homemade, just prepackaged ones that were in the pantry. She lamented not being able to make cookies herself, and suddenly realized she needed to perfect that skill, for a variety of reasons.

She walked into the training room, sliding the door open, and saw Sasha there meditating. Her eyes were closed as she sat cross legged on the floor, and Cien wasn't sure if she would be intruding. She looked to be in deep concentration over something.

"Hey," Sasha said, her eyes still closed. After a second, she opened her eyes and looked over at her, a slight look of disappointment on her face over whatever it was she was trying to accomplish with her meditation. "What's up?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted a treat?" Cien offered, hefting the two mugs and the cookies she had wrapped in a napkin and was holding laced in her fingers.

"Oh sure," Sasha said, turning around, still on the floor, to face her. She held out her hands to take something.

Cien knelt in a slightly awkward manner and handed Sasha her mug of hot cocoa.

"Thanks," Sasha said, taking the mug. "Do you want to sit and join me?" She offered as she set the mug down next to her.

"Sure." Cien said, handing her the cookies and awkwardly trying to work her way down to the floor. "I remember when this was much easier." She groused, ending up in an odd position with her legs folded under her.

"Yeah," Sasha chuckled. "And it won't get easier. That's why chairs and the couch will become your friends when it comes to sitting," she said, slowly lowering her hands as she had them out to help her in case she fell or lost her balance.

Cien adjusted herself a little bit to sit more comfortably. "How are you feeling about the trip to Coruscant?" Cien asked, trying to edge her way into trying to find out why Sasha had seemed so distant and annoyed with her lately.

"Excited and nervous," Sasha answered as she grabbed her mug. "I can't wait to see the planet again, but at the same time, I'm nervous to see the Jedi Temple again."

"I'm looking forward to it." Cien said. "I hope the tour we booked will let us see everything. You three will probably be able to give a better tour than the guide, honestly." Cien said with a cautious smile.

"Oh I barely remember the layout," Sasha said, nonchalantly. "Op might remember it better than me or Viran would. But once we get there, it might all come back." She sipped her hot chocolate. "Hm, this is great. Thanks." She smiled as she took another sip.

"You're welcome, you're a good teacher." Cien said, taking a sip of her tea. "I can't wait until my stomach settles, tea isn't nearly as good at warding off winter."

"Yeah, I noticed the same thing too when I was pregnant with Lana," Sasha said. "But that first mug after, oh," she sighed, "that was so good."

"Another thing to look forward to." Cien said, a little absently. "I…" She started, "is it okay that I'm going to the conference, and everything?" Cien asked.

"Yeah. Why? Is everything okay?" Sasha asked, concerned. "Don't you want to go?"

"I do, I'm looking forward to it." Cien said, swallowing, and she took a sip of tea. "Just that ever since I came out in the… that costume I was planning to wear, I felt like I may have crossed a line." She said, glancing downwards.

"Crossed the line?" Sasha asked, confused. "In what way? I like it." She said with the tiniest hint of guardedness to her voice.

Cien looked back up at her, trying to read her, and picking up on that guarded tone she spoke in, and then looked away. She decided to try a different approach. "You seemed a little surprised when I came out in them." She observed carefully.

"Well I hadn't seen you in robes like that in a long time and I was surprised at how good they looked on you," Sasha said before taking a sip, her gaze towards Cien. "Like they fit really well and did wonders for your curves, and they were made in a week which is quite impressive." She tried to explain.

Cien nodded and took a sip of her tea. "Yeah." She replied, remembering the last time Sasha had seen her in robes like that. It would have been aboard the Bloodstorm, during her rescue. But, realistically, the last time she had really seen Cien in robes like that had been after Cien had kidnapped her, and she tried to hide a grimace from getting that glimpse of what was bothering Sasha. "And it has been a very long time since I've worn robes like that." Cien said very, very carefully. "Not since I got my armor and I joined the family." She observed.

"Yeah," Sasha said absently, taking a sip.

"I..." Cien started, and looked down at her mug. "I am sorry if that brought up old memories that were hurtful." She said quietly, and contritely.

"No, it's fine," Sasha said, dismissively. "I'm okay. Please don't feel bad about it."

"Are you sure?" Cien asked. "Sasha, I..." She stopped, and looked down at her mug. "I don't want you to look at me and be reminded of what I used to be. You're my sister, and I love you." She said quietly. "And I didn't mean for that to dredge up the darker parts of our history."

"I love you too," Sasha said, looking at her. "And it's okay. I promise. It was just a brief momentary reaction. But I'm fine now. They are just memories that no longer bother me. I promise." She said, repeating that phrase. "And when you wear it on Coruscant, you will look stunning and no one will be able to believe an actual Sith is before them. And I will be proud to say that is my sister up there."

Cien nodded. "I'm not actually a Sith, though. Not any more, and that is thanks greatly to you." Cien said. "Trying to put my thoughts together over the last week or two about what my life was like before, it reminded me of how different everything is, now." She said, swallowing, and looking back down at her mug. "And that has only reinforced how grateful I am for all of these changes in my life, and it started, really, with you reaching out to me."

Sasha looked at her before looking down at her own mug. "I did nothing really. I just gave you a second chance and friendship as I felt you deserved it," she said. She then looked at her again. "Now you are here with us and I couldn't be happier with that. Besides, you also taught me to be stronger and use my gifts in ways I never thought were possible. So I'm grateful for you too."

Cien looked at her for a moment. "What you did was anything but 'nothing', Sasha." She said. "You reached out to me when no one else had, when no one else would have, and gave me someplace safe to come to." She said, looking away. "For everything you've done for me, I have a debt I can never repay to you. And I don't want to do anything that would remind you of that dark past, or, worse, cause any sort of divide between us."

"That will never happen," Sasha said, smiling softly at her. She held her hand out to her. "Nothing could divide us."

Cien took her hand. "I did have one thing I wanted to ask, though." Cien started slowly and carefully.

"What's that?" Sasha asked, curious as she held her hand.

"I feel like since I'm going to be a mom soon, I need to know how to make proper cookies. Could you help me?" Cien asked.

"Of course," Sasha beamed at her. "I'd love to teach you. Want to go make some now?" She asked, eagerly.

"Sure." Cien said with a smile, trying to get up.

Sasha hopped to her feet and offered Cien a hand to get up. Cien took it and leveraged herself up. "If I have to look and feel like a purrgil I wish I could float as gracefully as one." She groused in a good natured way. "Thanks."

Sasha snorted in laughter at that. "That would make things a lot easier," she said then added. "Of course." She bent back down and grabbed the mugs and the cookies that had yet to be touched. "Shall we?" She asked as she straightened back up and handed Cien her mug while Sasha carried the rest.

"Yes, thank you." Cien said, taking her mug and starting to head for the door. Sasha followed after her.

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