Born by Fire, Bathed in Moonlight

by RightBeforeYouDream

On Earth, Usagi is still struggling to accept the impending responsibility of Crystal Tokyo when a strange sickness threatens to alter her destiny once again. Across the Universe, Seiya discovers a new power, one that forces him to chose between his love...or possibly his life. (A bit AU, but based off the beloved manga)

9. A New Dawn

A New Dawn

The cake hadn't even been sliced.

She had forgotten about it completely, and now, in the cool blue of dawn, it glowed like the painting it was fashioned after.

A cluster of yellows, golds, and oranges lay in a feast suited more for the eyes than the mouth. Truly, what Mako-chan did with icing could have landed her in a college of the arts.

The guardian of Jupiter captured the essence of the original work completely: a crescent moon blazing as if it were the sun itself. It was one of her best works.

Mako-chan and Ami bonded over a shared art history class. They talked about it constantly in the groupchat Usagi had long since muted. Usagi had avoided the subject entirely, it triggered too many splits, but even she could see all the techniques the guardian reemployed in the confection.

What a beautiful cake.

Usagi's stomach agreed with her thoughts with a loud grumble. Her body inched towards it.

It lay, untouched, and most importantly—uneaten, under a simple glass dome. Her tongue remembered the almost impossible airiness of Makoto's sponge cakes. As beautiful as her creations were, they tasted even better.

A tiny sliver would help soothe the aching of her sweet tooth. She'd been so busy with school she hadn't nearly forgotten the taste of her favorite meal: dessert.

The effects of said forgetfulness had been outwardly positive. Just the other day, Luna had complimented that she was looking slimmer, like her mother had been. Usagi knew which mother she was referring to. She thanked her feline advisor and brushed the comparison aside.

She avoided thinking of Queen Serenity too much. Besides the splits, referring to someone else as her mother when it was Mama Ikuko who raised her, completely unaware of her daughter's first life, seemed unfair.

When she did think of that woman, like on full moons, the image of Queen Serenity was often cloudy, and when it was clear, she still doubted her own mind.

Selene seemed unreal.

Eyes of an otherworldly lilac, skin so pale it was glimmered silver, and a body lithe and feminine like a fairy.

Compared to a literal goddess, Usagi was just a newly slim and perpetually hungry little girl.

Her tongue clicked on the roof of her mouth.

Mama Ikuko often made the same annoying cluck whenever she chided her, like when she caught her only daughter eating leftovers in her room, "You should eat with the family, not hole up in here like a hermit."

And like an animal in her shell, Usagi could be found hidden in one of two places: her room or the library at school.

There was so much catching up to do. She ate when her work was done and the accomplishment of being productive allowed her to reprioritize food. She needed a miraculous year to make up for the last three. It was a wonder how through all their enemies Ami had rarely ever slipped from first place. Maybe the monotony of books was a relief from the erratic nature of their Sailor lives. It had been for her. They hadn't talked one-on-one for months, so there was no way for Usagi to know for sure.

She still used Ami's study techniques though. When she debuted publicly as Sailor Moon people would be disappointed if they found out that the leader of the free world had almost flunked out of highschool. Her fiancé was a child prodigy, the least she could do was finish school in the upper third of her class. It was a secret dream of hers to finish in the top twenty.

All the thinking made her even hungrier.

Drool inadvertently gathered at the corners of her lips, the back of her palm raised to wipe it, and when saw herself in the cake's glassy covering, she quickly flipped her hand to catch the bead of saliva with her middle finger.

Books were one thing, etiquette was yet another skill she had to sharpen. That was Michiru's forte, who she learned it from, was another blank space.

The distance between her and the cake shortened to a breath. Her exhale blurred the glass and filtered her reflection: an oversized shirt, loose sleeping shorts, messy hair.

A slightly tall child looked back at her.

Eating the cake after ruining the party they had all planned so well for her, that's what Chibi-Usa would do. She hadn't even had time to properly thank them for decorating, cooking, showing up and cleaning up after her tantrum.

Conviction beat her need for the confection.

A sound of even more disappointment, both at her hunger and her inability to satisfy it, pushed past her lips.

Yes, she had ruined the celebration last night, but a birthday party wasn't really over until the cake was cut and the candles were blown out. Her eyes bounced to the backyard, the scene of her crimes. There was still a chance. Maybe tonight they would slice it together, after she served them a full meal of apologies.

An apple from the kitchen island replaced what would have been her breakfast treat. The splash of red in the steel gray bowl was the only color in the pristine, monochromatic kitchen. Even Mamoru's place had more variance in shade.

He had always commented on how clean the silver of the Crystal Tokyo palace looked on their visit to the future. He and Michiru had described her room as "cute", which was their polite way of saying childish.

Outside, she carefully closed the outer screen doors, separating herself from the rest of the house. Cold clung to her like a second skin and she rubbed the goosebumps off her arms. She couldn't understand why, when it finally became warm, people suddenly desired to recreate winter in their homes.

Everyone was still asleep. An hour, two at most, was all she had to herself in a group of chronically early risers.

The air was damp, cool, and perfect in the way summer mornings could be before they became unbearable. If she could, she would stop time right here. Alas, that was Setsuna's gift.

Another minute of twilight ticked by. Sixty seconds closer to what was sure to be an awkward encounter with the scouts.

A lecture was inevitable, and the person she wanted to hear it from the least, would be the first to give it. Haruka.

Ever the athlete, she never missed an early morning run. In fact, the sailor senshi had invited her along plenty of times, especially when Luna had reported her early risings.

Waking up with the sun was one thing; running alongside it was a level of adulthood she didn't even want to aspire to.

And running wasn't all that bad. Fleeing enemies was half of her strategy when it came to fighting youma. What annoyed her was that she would never be as fast as Haruka, and didn't want to bear the embarrassment of staring at her back as she ran ahead. Or worse, be tethered to her side as Haruka purposely slowed down for her.

Guilt creeped up from her gut and settled in its usual position in her chest. A few jogs and maybe she would have known what all of the senshi were up to. Maybe it wouldn't have been such a shock, such an offense, that they were living a life she was merely surviving.

The senshi of wind knew there was no way she could keep up. Usagi wasn't that fast and until that morning hadn't considered herself that strong.

Usagi pressed the pads of her index finger and thumb together. They tingled with pain. She had pulled out more splinters than she could count that very morning. Apparently, she pressed too hard into the picnic table the night before.

If there was any damage to the bench, surely Ami or Setsuna would have caught it. It would be another thing to apologize and then possibly explain.

She sat on the edge of the deck, and her finger curled around its polished edge. Could she break the wood now if she tried? Muscles in her wrist twitched as if eager to test the theory. A little test…just to see. The wood groaned a pathetic creak. Quickly, Usagi folded her hands over the taut skin over the apple in her lap. There was enough drama last night with her new found powers. No need to create more now.

Her head craned upwards. A few clouds cradled stars that lingered to see the sunrise.

Gray blue light enveloped the deck in the soft tulle of morning. Crickets chirped. The bird started the first notes of their song. Mornings like this, when the sky was close, had become her favorite. Dewy leaves whispered to each other in the surrounding trees, quieter still from the fresh gaps on their branches.

Light colored wood creaked under her bare feet as she shifted her weight to stand. It was here. Here was where she stood where she pushed Haruka back with her own wind.

Her own senshi. Her own friend.

Usagi squeezed the apple tight enough that her nails pierced the skin and its juice stung against her healing skin.

She had desperately wanted to be left alone and then, suddenly, even more fervently, wanted to be included. Her own feelings confused her, surprised her. Yes, they all bickered like siblings. They teased each other, but argued? Yelled? It wasn't them.

It wasn't her.

It wasn't like her to be angry. Upset? Of course. Sad, sleepy, irritated, and hungry were all frequent emotions—anger was a new thing.

She stripped off her white ankle socks and stepped on the damp grass. All signs of the party last night were gone, save a lantern tangled in the branches above.

The breeze shifted her bangs ever so slightly. It was softer than the unnatural force that had torn up the abandoned lantern. Gentler than the wind she had turned against Haruka.

The sandy haired soldier's face appeared in her mind again. An androgynous beauty with hurt settled in the furrow of her brow. What kind of princess threw a tantrum because her court was doing what she begged them to do: live their own lives? What kind of queen would she hope to be like this?

An image of Sailor Cosmos floated in her mind. The scouts hadn't seen that form of Chibi-Chibi. They hadn't witnessed how that bubbly little girl was also an incredibly powerful woman: tortured and alone. That could be her fate if she kept pushing them away.

Juice from the apple trailed softly from her tight palm to the soft ground.

Alone. The distance she had created for their own safety.

What could she even say? What would she even speak of without sharing things that she wouldn't even let herself think?

Usagi's breath hitched and the bridge of her nose tingled. It sucked being called a crybaby, but people didn't know the joy of crying and getting over it. She hadn't had a good cry in so long. Princesses cried. Queens did not.

Another brush of wind caressed her cheek. It was quiet. Empty. No one would see if she did.

Her eyes ached with the effort to remain dry. They had gone through too much for her to waste tears on a tantrum. She had to ground herself.

Usagi pushed her regret to the soles of her feet and stepped onto the trim yard. Slick grass bent underneath her toes. The air was cool and dry. A few more steps and she was in the middle of the freshly trimmed backyard.

The sun would rise over her right shoulder in a few seconds. She could feel it. The slight rise in temperature, the softening of the sky in pinks and reds as it prepared.

If she was home, she would wait for sunrise in bed. Her room would slowly brighten and its rays would wash over her, baptizing her in a balm of light. On the weekends she would wait on the balcony, when the neighborhood was almost eerily quiet. Finally still. During the week it would pull her up like a flower, and she would start her day energized by its silent encouragement. The night was over, the day was new. Everyone was still safe. School books would be waiting for her, the math formulas ready to push her troubled thoughts to the back of her mind.

Rays of yellow began their birth over the horizon.

The day of her seventeenth birthday had officially begun. Her hair shimmered like spun gold as she turned to look back at the estate crested by its light. It'd been a while since she was fully outside during a sunrise.

Pain pierced her pupils like an arrow.

Her wrists jerked to her face to cover her eyes. The apple fell from her hand and rolled to a stop against the pole of the wooden deck.

It felt like the most acute migraine she'd ever suffered and what started in her eyes quickly felt like fire raining down her whole body.

The bones of her spine bowed to it, overwhelmed by a single wave of pure agony.

Her right hand clawed at her chest in a desperate attempt to force air into her lungs, her left gripped at the flesh of her stomach. Air evaded her. Her limbs flailed in a movement that made her body resemble a broken bird trying to fly.

Quickly losing the battle to breathe, both knees buckled and her clawing morphed into crawling.

The morning birds held their song and watched as her red tinged flesh made a sick sizzling sound where body met earth.

She was being burned alive.

Her right elbow snapped and she flopped onto her stomach under the weight.

Breathing became more difficult. The burning only got worse. A mist formed around her. Her sweat beaded and evaporated off her now lobster colored flesh. In a terribly awkward angle, her left foot dug into the grass in a feeble attempt to gain some type of footing.

Her other foot dug white toes into the fresh cut soft dirt and tried to push her body toward the house.

She barely moved an inch.

A cloud shifted to unveil the full morning sun.

Another wave hit.

Her scream was born in her stomach and died in her throat. A breathy rattle escaped her mouth in a sound that was unrecognizable to her. It took all of Usagi's strength to turn her head. Her eyes had been screwed shut, but she had to see. See if there was an enemy in front of her. In proximity to her friends. She opened her eyes in the direction of the white manor where all the scouts lay sleeping after her birthday celebrations.

There was no one there.

A crystalized promise, a heart shaped diamond, glared in the morning sun as she reached out to them. It dangled off her top knuckle as she attempted to grip the top of the wooden deck.

Could he feel her life slipping away from the other side of their tiny planet? Could they feel it across the yard?

Only a few feet separated her from the door. All her writhing got her no closer to them.

Sisters she vowed to protect. Women who had continued to protect her. Her beloved Sailor Senshi.

Just out of reach.

Her body spasmed under another wave. Lava. Lava was running through her veins. Every nerve screamed. Bile rose in her throat.

The muscles in her arm flexed and cramped. Her fingers contorted so hard, three of her knuckles popped. The ring fell somewhere in the grass. The black circle framing her vision began to close in. The white house was quickly becoming a blurred image.

Maybe this is the end , she thought, and finally her mind was carried away into darkness.

I'm sorry.

It was light out. She could tell even with her eyes closed. Mid-afternoon, later than the early hours on the back porch.

One eye at a time opened to a beach—no, her eyes swallowed the scene around her—it was a desert.

A moment ago, she was sure she had been dying in the Tenoh-Kaiou-Meiou family backyard.

She carefully put weight on her arms and found herself able to hoist herself up. Her hands gingerly touched her neck. Nervously, she cleared her throat. She hadn't even had time to scream.

The last thing she had felt on Earth was pain.

Bodily, human pain like she had never felt before. No magical attack had ever hurt like that. She wrapped her arms around herself. She was in one piece. She could feel what felt like new muscle on her triceps. Her hand settled over the soft flesh of her breast and felt her even heartbeat. A human thump pulsed through her thin white shirt. She was sure her heart had stopped. That's how sudden, how piercing the attack had been. Now, she felt fine.

She was fine.

In fact, she felt better than before.

She quickly dismissed the fact that a feather of disappointment breezed through her thoughts.

Her eyes caught up to a fact her mind had immediately registered and pushed aside to assess her health: she was not on Earth.

The green of the sky mirrored the grass of her front lawn. Sand spread in a flat plane undisturbed in all directions. Her toes curled against the soft texture of the shifting grains. No footprints in either direction. No memory loss.

Air carried no heaviness. She centered herself like Rei had taught her and cast a net with her mind. No shape of life poked through the flatness of the space around her. A sigh of relief. Her senshi weren't here so at least they were safe. Whatever this was, wherever she was, they were far out of reach from it.

There was no wind, no sound. Usagi swallowed a deep breath and held it.

No one was around.

She flexed her hand and her breath hitched when fingers curled around the air. The silver crystal didn't materialize.

Usagi raised her right hand, "Moon Crystal Power!"

Nothing. Not even an echo.

Okay. Plan A: "Transform and Escape" was a failure.

Her fingers completely healed from last night's outburst, yet the lengths of her nails were the same. No time jumps at least.

A green sky and a desert.

These images were in her dream. She had been mistaken. Clearly this was not Kinmoku. She took a decisive step forward. Her foot didn't immediately sink. She looked up at the green sky. There was no sun, but it was certainly a day–if this place even had a night.

Probably in another dimension then. She took another step and looked over her shoulder, her footprints remained as proof. She'd been in more than her fair share of physical and multi-dimensional traps. She would walk first, and freak out later, if at all. Something in her told her that this place—this strange space that was definitely not Earth, and probably not another planet—was exactly where she was supposed to be, and yet, anxiety clawed at her confidence.

"I better hurry," she murmured, and quickened her pace in the direction she chose. Once the girls woke up, it would take Ami all of two seconds with her mini computer to realize she was not only not at the house, she wasn't in their world.

They would jump to the reasonable conclusion: kidnapping, and then this on top of last night's fight would be a classic brainwashing and kidnapping combination enemies had used to divide them over the years. It was more typical to vanish, and then reappear brainwashed, but either way they would be worried.

The longer she stayed, the longer it would support what they always thought: that she shouldn't be alone. That her life was always going to be at risk. That she needed them to constantly be around to protect her.

She would handle this herself. If she hurried, she could wrap up this little time-space excursion and be back before anyone noticed her missing.

Usagi's stomach growled. She should have eaten the apple. "I need to be back in time for breakfast."

It had been at least thirty minutes. Fatigue, surprisingly hadn't set in, the difficulty was sticking to the plan of walking in one direction when nothing but her footsteps were proof she was moving anywhere. She was halfway through humming The Three Lights deluxe album. When she came to the last song she would have to reevaluate her plan.

The last year had made her scarily good at compartmentalizing. Three years ago, she would have probably spent the first hour here sobbing, scared. The weather here was nice. It was almost peaceful. Nothing here to trigger a split. If not for the lack of food, water, and basic shelter…it would have made a nice vacation spot.

Her body suddenly stiffened before she forced it to relax. Something had appeared in the distance.

In a moment her brain fully shifted from the mind of a girl to a warrior, even if its crystal catalyst was nowhere to be seen. Her vision blurred and then sharpened like binoculars, honed in on clarifying the human-like shape on the edge of her sight.

When placed in an unknown, alternate dimension, somebody was better than nobody. A body was an ally to help her escape, or an enemy whose elimination could still assist in her freedom.

Still, she approached slowly.

The destroying part would be hard to do without the silver crystal. Her mind flashed to the night before when she used Haruka's wind against her. Truthfully, she had never used that power, and swore afterwards she would never use it again–on her friends, at least. An enemy, however, was a completely different matter.

If she could provoke them into attacking her first, she could use their magic against them. The memory she had tried to block out was one she now desperately analyzed. The feel of Haruka's wind was like silk, being held and flung in the opposite direction. She rubbed her fingertips together as if to conjure up the muscle memory.

Last night, she was just a human girl, or as close to one as she could be, when she used that power. There was a fifty percent chance she could do it again. Maybe less than that. Another rule she had learned when unwillingly transported to another dimension: stay positive.

She clucked like Mama Ikuko. Any chance was better than nothing. She could do it.

A rounded back and careful, elevated steps made her look more predator than prey.

Unobstructed sand and sky lay between her and that distant figure, but it felt necessary to gather more information.

Closer. She had to get closer.

As she pressed forward, more of the figure became apparent. Their hair was long. It reached the middle of their back and fell in golden waves over their shoulders. They were tall. She could tell from the length of their limbs even though they sat like a child. They looked like they were thinking about something, or waiting, from the way their head rested on a clenched first, its connecting arm balanced upright on their knee in a thinking position. They angled their head the same way she did when she was working on an especially hard math problem.

Did they not notice her?

She was maybe the length of a neighborhood block away.

In her crouched position she stuck her neck out further. In that space between her sternum and her navel, caution built itself. This was as close as she would go. Could go. She braced her core and stilled herself.

She wasn't moving, because neither were they.

Life moved. The beating of a heart, a slight shift of the chest as one took breath, humanoid forms were one of endless motion. This…this host did not so much as twitch. Whatever it was, if it was human, it was staying very, very still.

No matter how much she tried to calm herself, her breathing was uneven. Air kept trapping itself in her chest. The inhale, she understood, the exhale was held up by the collision of her thoughts. Her body was telling her to freeze, her mind telling her to flee.

She exhaled.

As if finally sensing her presence, it jerked. Long flowing hair whipped from its shoulder as it cocked its head forward in the wrong direction.

Its head turned toward her slowly, quickly followed by its knee. In a blink it was standing in her direction. It was huge.

It was a humanoid man.

And he was heading straight towards her.

He covered the length between them in three powerful strides. She barely had time to brace for impact. So much for her new deflection power. Both her mind and body had feared something physical.

Fuck!

Darn.

Mamoru hated when she cursed.

He wasn't there anyway.

"Fuck!"

There was no time.

In an act of pure self-preservation she sank into her left leg and brought up her forearms over her neck and face. Makoto had taught her this stance. Her knee had barely dropped to a full defensive position before he barreled into her, scooping her up, and startling her with a laugh deep and broad enough it should have been followed by an echo.

It wasn't an evil laugh. The strong forearms that had grabbed her weren't crushing her, though they had wrapped her in a very tight, very warm embrace. Behind her arms, her mouth had opened widely to bite him as a part of plan C, when she realized the attack was a very strong bear hug.

Her mouth closed.

She slowly dropped her hands that flew up to protect her head and neck. Trembling, her fingers descended, and she couldn't help but gasp when he came into view.

His hair was a crown of sunshine. Golden locks glowed like a precious metal up close, embroidered with a platinum streak of white that stemmed from his widow's peak. Incredibly tanned skin was covered by a story of scars, and it only made him look more rakishly handsome. This was a man who couldn't be more than his mid-thirties.

All that beauty and still it was his eyes that shocked her.

Thick, light colored brows, hovered above fox shaped eyes where curly, white-blonde lashes framed pure blue irises. Irises of her own clear cobalt. A perfect shade of ocean that confirmed what her heart had felt as soon as his body made contact with hers. It was a familiar energy akin to walking into one's home after a long vacation, everything exactly as it was left.

That feeling told her what to say next, and before she asked the question, her spirit already knew the answer.

"Dad?"

"Serenity."

It was her name in a song. The first vowel more forced and the last completed with what sounded like an "h". His mouth continued to move, and it was nothing like Japanese. His square jaw dropped too much when he spoke.

Why did I just call him that?

He was smiling at her with a wolfish grin. His canines were sharp, closer to fangs than regular teeth. His arms wrapped her so tightly and she could feel the magical, almost feverish heat emanating from them. It almost soothed her. Her shoulders relaxed, and before her mind could follow their ease she wriggled out of his grip.

No, she was confused. Her hands pushed him away and she shuffled backwards awkwardly. That man couldn't be her father. Papa Kenji was still tucked away at home. It was Saturday, one of two days of the week he could actually sleep in.

This man…he must look like her previous incarnation's father: the first Queen Serenity's husband. Yes–that's why something in her bones felt the familiarity between them. Maybe there was an image somewhere deep in the library of her mind that recognized him from the silver millennium. It was a trick.

Once again, her body reset into a defensive position.

The cheery giant shed the smile as soon as she slivered out of his arms. His hands had dropped to his sides. The man was staring at her. Flecks of ice swirled in the clear cobalt she swore she recognized.

It could be a trap. This could truly be her father's millennia's old corpse, conjured up and filled with evil to ensnare her. Drag her down beneath this endless sand.

Wiseman had done something similar to Chibi-Usa to create Black Lady. Beryl had done it to bring back the Shittenou. Yes, it was probably a living corpse that resembled the man who made a child with the past Queen Serenity.

Her chance to destroy the vessel, or whatever it was probably would have been in the moment it had swept her up. She analyzed the figure again. Her faux father was taller than Mamoru by at least a head and a half. One of his biceps was easily the size of her thigh. If he wanted to kill her with brute strength he could have snapped her spine in half when he grabbed her.

Hey eyes worked their way up again to that formidable face.

Ice melted into a sea of blue again. He put his hand out, and took a step forward. A tentative smile on his face.

She stepped back.

That smile withered away.

"Serenity."

This time it sounded like a command.

Again she didn't move. And so he crossed his arms, a difficult feat considering the thickness of his muscles, and stared at her.

"You look so much like her."

His eyes scanned over her, dissecting her, and she felt inadequate in her pajamas and bare feet.

"Dad." The beginning and ending consonants sounded too heavy as he attempted to echo her. It sounded like he said dead.

"It is a name I had once dreamed of hearing," his voice was so deep she could feel it in her chest. Whatever language he was speaking she didn't understand off her ears alone. The meaning simply flowed into her mind.

Her eyes widened slightly as her mind raced to another conclusion. How did she understand him without her silver crystal? Was that his true weapon? Some sort of mental attack? He wore a simple sleeveless cream tunic and loose pants. There were no daggers or swords she could see.

"You call me your father, yet you run from me. Do you not know who I am? Is that why you fear me?" A deep line appeared on his forehead.

He was confused.

Good.

That made two of them.

He looked human enough. Any moment though, he could morph into a youma. Who knew what ugliness rippled under that beautiful exterior?

Everything in her willed the silver crystal to her side again. Her right hand quivered in its absence. It did not come. The musk of fear clouded her senses. She did fear him. She had not sensed him until he was already upon her, and now, a few steps away his power was so bright it was palpable. Overwhelming.

"Who are you?" Her body moved toward his right side. A thick pinkish scar bisected the skin from his brow to the top of his beautiful cheekbone. Maybe he was blind in that eye, that would be where she would attack from.

Past him, she could still the path he had cut in the earth to get to her. A gash in the sand connected where he was to where he had been. She had seen many people teleport. This wasn't that. His feet never left the ground, though it had certainly looked like it. He ran, and not teleported, even though the movement was just as fast.

" What are you?", she said crossly.

One of his cross arms clenched ever so slightly at the fist. He readjusted, and she caught a glimmer of an amber glass band on what looked like a knuckle that had healed broken.

He took a calming breath and his voice was deep, empty, "I was Emperor of your Solar System. I was the last king of the Sun: the one true star. I am Apollo, bonded to Selene, father to Princess Serenity."

The eerie pull from before that told her she was his father almost caused her head to bow at his introduction. She gritted her teeth and remained upright.

In hindsight, she would swear she saw him float in that moment. That the mere mention of his power separated him from the ground.

Whatever magic he had was old. Ancient in the way Chaos was when she faced it. Something way before even her first life. Magic that old could make one feel anything. Do anything.

" If that is true. Where were you? Queen Serenity. Princess Serenity. All of them died a very long time ago," she forced herself to keep her voice even, keep the pain from coloring her words, "–and then again after that. Why are you here now?"

He sniffed the air and twitched as if there was a foul odor. He paused, and then held the crook of his elbow to his nose and took a deep inhale. That line in his forehead deepened. He was disgusted by something. Disgusted by her.

She hated that a part of her cared enough to be offended.

The owner of that warm, deep laugh was also the master of a spine straightening snarl. He ignored her questions and countered them with his own. "You are her and not. Who are you?"

Even he could tell: she was no princess.

Apollo took another step forward. This time she didn't retreat. Blue battled blue.

She sat into her stance. She needed to get home. Her fists were still raised at eye level as she gritted out: "Usagi Tsukino, daughter of Ikuko and Kenji Tsukino."

He bristled at her emphasis on daughter. Good. That's what he got for making such a face earlier.

"I am Eternal Sailor Moon, member of the Sailor Scouts, second incarnation of Princess Serenity," she took a breath and lowered her hands slightly to get a better look at his reaction, "soon to be Neo-Queen Serenity, ruler of Earth and protector of the Solar System."

He smirked. He didn't balk at her titles. Titles she had never strung together. Titles that scared even her. He almost looked proud.

The man claiming to be her father stared at her for minutes that seemed to crawl by. Then the man sat. He crossed his legs and returned to the position that she had approached him in. She was crouched in a fighting stance and he was sitting like a monk about to start meditation.

It was another few minutes of awkward silence before she sat too.

Even seated he dwarfed her. If he was telling the truth, he came from a time she had been desperately trying to avoid in her mind: the Silver Millenium

She had never told the Senshi of those first few weeks haunted by nightmares. She'd will herself still and rush to the bathroom to dry heave over the sink and not scare Luna with the details. Crystal clear images of her own bloodied hands on the hilt of Endymion's sword replayed each night. The Silver Millenium. An era of renowned peace. It was a time where her first mother, dying and alone, sent them off to the future where they would live and die and live again.

His voice cut into her thoughts before they were completely clouded by her past. "I did not mean to scare you nor harm you with my approach." He looked down at his hands with disdain, "Artemis, I remember dislocating his shoulder when I greeted him. The cat-man has hated me ever since."

Her eyebrows wanted to arch upwards but she dragged them into a neutral, meditative look she saw Setsuna often employ.

So he knew Artemis. It proved nothing. Even the best liars knew how to sprinkle in truth.

Apollo looked up again at her and they once again had sunk to a hollowness that chilled her.

"You have answered my question so I will answer yours," he said mournfully, "I was not there, during your first life, because I had passed on. I died not even a full moon cycle after you were born."

He breathed out a breath between a scoff and a sigh and those broad shoulders dropped by a fraction. "I held you just once before, right after you took your first breath." The scar over his eye crinkled as his eyes twitched briefly. After a clearing of his throat, that cool mask returned.

That small break in his frigid exterior shifted something in her, if only a little. Tragedy, it seemed, was something she had inherited. An apology formed and dissipated. Sorry wouldn't change anything.

"Even if you are the second incarnation…" Apollo paused and shook his head. "Regardless of the Tsukisho family you come from. We are here together because of our connection. We are still blood."

"Tsukino," she corrected.

"Regardless, it is we whose souls are tied." He spoke in a voice that left little room for argument.

It was scary. The way he slipped from the man with the echoing laughter to a mercenary with less effort than it took to strike a match. She couldn't tell which one was really him.

Her so-called father. Even if it was some sort of trick, it was nice to see him. Or what he would have been like. The man whom she had gotten her blonde hair and blue eyes from, not the great-grandfather her Papa Kenji attributed her features to. It never bothered her, especially considering her future child could have blush pink hair and red eyes. Would have.

He didn't have a pore on him. Minako would have tortured him for his skincare routine. If not for his hulking frame, he could have passed for a beautiful woman. Even the way he sat was elegant in its own way, like he was posed for a painting that would hang in the national museum.

She had tripped walking down the stairs that morning.

And he had said, proudly, their souls were tied?

Everything that told her there was a connection between them, that vomited the word Dad at just the sight of him, also told her to be afraid. His beautiful scars, the one that claimed the quadrant of his right eye, the tick on his neck, and the gruesome X on his chest were one of a warrior's. Still, they made him look gallant. Usagi couldn't help but think of how they must have looked side by side. A beaded orange earring jangled on his right ear as he talked.

Him and Queen Serenity must have been devastating together.

He waited for her to finish looking. He could be so strikingly still that he seemed inhuman. He broke that stillness with a cross of his muscular arms over his chest.

So their souls were tied. What now?

"I'm here now because you have sunsickness."

Usagi took a sharp inhale, "I'm dying?"

He quickly brought up his hands to stop her, suddenly flustered, looking younger than the thirty years she originally gave him. "It's like…what an Earthling would call puberty. It's life threatening only on rare occasions. Though I would say…you are a rare occasion. Outside of flares, it is typically annoying at best and more dangerous to others than you."

Worried made itself plain on her face, and she didn't care enough to hide it.

Apollo continued, "Visions, overheating, extreme chill, excess fatigue are all manifestations of it. It is your body laying claim on your innate planetary affinity."

Planetary what?

These were the answers that she had been simultaneously looking for and avoiding for almost a year and yet it was so hard to understand.

She scooted forward, making sure to favor the side with the scarred eye.

If he was telling the truth, if all of her weird symptoms had brought them together to reveal an answer, she needed to quickly collect them so she could go home and move on.

"Planetary affinity," she murmured.

"Yes. Though it was more important when the Sailor Scouts of the inner planets hadn't yet awakened. Those little girls certainly leveled the playing field. Your mother was so sure they would be your friends," with that he smiled so widely that she could see his fangs again.

He leaned forward. The difference between them was suddenly incredibly close again. Less than an inch separated her nose from his.

They were so close their knees almost touched, though he sat in the same meditative manner and she sat in a more traditional style with her ankles tucked under her tailbone.

He seemed to ponder her as she did him. She straightened her head. They both had their head cocked to the right as they looked at each other. Clearly she was a carbon copy of her mother, but those eyes, that golden hair, she had taken that from him.

Those blue eyes. For fleeting moments they almost looked soft in a face that was all hard lines.

"Tell me how I defeat sunsickness." She looked off to the sand behind him. It made her uneasy how quickly felt comfortable around him.

"You can't defeat it any more than you can defeat age, but I can show you how to manage it. It will require that I touch you." He reached out his hand, slowly. He still seemed pained that she had been so quick to end the hug. Their second hug ever apparently.

Usagi nodded. Even if it was all trickery, she needed more answers. Answers at least would pad her apology to her Senshi.

Again he touched her, this time holding each side of her head in his large palms. "The burning you feel in your veins, you take that fire, and the heat from it..." She was trying to listen, and also trying not to focus on the fact that he could have snapped her neck if he wanted. Ice that had flickered in his eyes told her that he had done it before.

His eyes told one story his power only supported. His body glowed gold and soon her skin reflected the same light. It was a warmth that felt like a sunbath. Healing almost.

"...Take that fire and release it back into the atmosphere," He took a long exhale and she felt a whisper of power slow her heart. She breathed out and he pulled back again. The fear receded like a wave on a summer shore.

"Your skin–"

"Glows hot. And still, not as hot as yours. I used my power to release the flow of yours back into your environment. I will teach you how to do it on your own." His hand returned to his heart.

"When your mother was carrying you, she would breathe ice clouds, you sucked up all the warmth in her body. And she would curl up to my chest like a cat whenever she could. Then when you were about to be born her skin was hot to the touch and she wouldn't let me anywhere near her. She had the most random symptoms." His eyes stared directly into her own, but she knew from the faraway look he was not seeing her.

His eyes blinked back to the present, "Sunsickness is the result of fighting against your ascension into adulthood. Ascension is a rite every child of the Sun goes through when they discover and then master their planetary affinity. It was a well guarded secret because it is also when we are out our weakest. It is only as dangerous as you allow it to be."

All she had dwelled on was how dangerous he was. He wasn't the one who used his power against the people he loved.

Where anger surged, guilt quickly lapped up its absence. She suddenly found the lines of her palms more interesting than the man in front of her.

She had come for answers, and now it was her duty to retrieve them. Her fist clenched.

"In the beginning, I was just sleepy. I rose when the sun rose and slept when it set. Recently though…I've been a danger to others. I…yesterday I almost hurt my friend. Not physically…but…I wasn't myself."

He leaned back on his wrists, and she could see the muscles rippling under his beige sleeveless tunic and matching loose pants. He examined her with a curious gaze.

"It's good to be around others. I had two bouts of sunsickness, where most had one. My original planetary affinity was with Mercury. All of my six siblings had an affinity for Mars. I was unimpressed by water magic. I hid and then denied it until it bubbled over. I destroyed an entire enemy village during a solar flare. I discovered then that ice could burn."

Emptiness flashed through his eyes and she shuddered.

"It took half my siblings and my father to stop my rampage," he said plainly.

He admitted to taking away so many lives without so much as a flinch.

"A flare is when you let your emotions go unchecked, they build, and then erupt. As powerful as you are, if everyone around you survived, you have done much better than most in your circumstances."

She had woken up this morning with apologies and cake on her mind and now was spending breakfast next to her first father while he talked about mass murder.

Apollo continued to speak, completely unfazed by this being his admittance of such violence. "I should start from the beginning. Well the middle," he fumbled through his words.

He clicked his tongue and scowled, "Selene was a better storyteller."

Her heart panged at the mention of her namesake. She had only ever seen the moon's projection of her. There had been times in their last battle when she looked to the sky and wondered how different it would be if she had reincarnated with them all. It seemed selfish when so many of her close friends had parents of their past lives they never got to see, and parents in their current life they had been fated to lose too.

"My people," he stopped and smiled a soft smile gesturing between the two of them, " Our people use ascension to get guidance from their elders. My aunt whipped me into mastering ice. When I went through it the second time I was just as lost. I was brought here too. Here, to the great planes. Time does not exist here, neither does death. In my time, my grandfather was here. His memories guided me. He wasn't that helpful, considering in life, he was a prolific drunk, and that was before he got his tongue ripped out for blasphemy. He slurred all of his advice."

His voice dropped, and she felt the hollowness enter his tone. "My grandfather was a terrible ruler. Cruel and unforgiving as he was almost impossibly strong. My father showed little difference, my brother, not much better than his predecessors. I knew and ignored it, content to test my swords in the meaningless wars they created. The truth? I was afraid to lead. I knew I was a great fighter. I had been a weapon from long before I ever touched a sword. It was politics that confused me, scared me. I was terrified to be a ruler, frightened I would be or become just as bad as my own family."

Usagi couldn't help wondering how many lives, innocent or otherwise, he had taken in his race away from the throne.

"I thought my grandfather's presence was a punishment. Visions of his past haunted me, even before I got to the planes. That wasn't the case, They showed me the truth: the consequences of bad leadership. In hindsight, it was more of a lesson of how not to live and I made sure to remember it," his lips were in a tight line as he recalled the memories.

That deathly look settled too easily on him. It was his eyes though, those eyes filled with regret, that at least made her believe he had a conscience. That the two sides of him could coexist in one body.

Still, casually speaking of such violence made her stomach churn. The silver crystal didn't maim, it purified. Whatever linked her to this man hopefully did not have the same affinity for bloodshed. Her thoughts must have shown on her face because Apollo continued.

"My home was not like the Moon Kingdom. It was not a peaceful place. It was kill or be killed. It was your mother who showed me a different path," he sighed, the simple reference of her brought him such pain.

"Our solar system has multiple planets, over a hundred moons, but only one star," he paused and that hard look of a general rearranged his face, "That's why the people of the sun have the power of planetary affinity. It gives us the power to control one other planetary power. The manifestation of said power adjusting to the shape of its new host is your ascension. You had a great-aunt who's ascension made her grow gills you know," he chuckled to himself and a tiny smile formed on Usagi's lip.

"Anyway, the rejection of it causes sunsickness. The closer to the sun, the more often the links were made apparent", Apollo instructed.

What did it mean then when her body had literally broken and remade itself?

He drew a line in the sand with his finger and then dug in nine holes alongside it. "It was common to see those with affinities for Mercury," he pointed to the first hole in the sand, "very rare to see dominance those linked to the power of Pluto".

The wind. Maybe her affinity was Uranus. That explained why she even thought to challenge Haruka so publically.

"It was more than just dominion over another planetary power. We could also, momentarily, take that power from others with the same affinity. For example, a great Sun warrior with an affinity for Jupiter could not only control lightning, but if in battle with a citizen of Jupiter, limit their enemies ability to use their own powers, or even turn them against them based on their difference in power levels."

He returned to the simple graphic he placed in the sand. "The sun's heat affects the temperature of every planetary body in its system. My sister honed her affinity to Mars so well a snap of her fingers could cause a spark. It was a lethal power, and we used that special advantage to dominate the solar system. You are only half Sun humanoid–"

Apollo swept the graphic away with one hand and traced a perfect circle in the sand.

"–So these things do not necessarily apply to you. You are a child of the moon and yet I can see your glow, sense the heat," his eyes twinkled in wonder,"I believe you do not have planetary affinity, but the affinity of our star."

Being special had never felt like such a curse.

"A star?" She chose her words carefully. He had already given her more answers than she could hope for, but he didn't need to know about her scuffle with the princess of Uranus. "How can you be sure? It doesn't even seem like you are very fond of the star you came from."

Apollo craned his head backward to the sky. "Sun humanoids are hot-blooded, gluttonous, prideful, and vengeful. It was our longstanding belief that we were entitled to lay claim on everything the sun shined upon. And in part, our power aided that belief. We can absorb energy from anything the sun reaches. This made us incredibly strong, and incredibly dangerous."

He grabbed a handful of sand into his fist and let it slide out of the crevices of his fingers, "We too were fiercely loyal, traditional, strong, and adventurous. We yielded ourselves to our hearts, even at the expense of our minds. We followed our feelings. To die with secrets was a dishonor to life. We lived a life of truth. What we wanted, we strived to attain…or died trying."

Something flickered in his eyes at the last phrase. He had died with regrets. Usagi knew the feeling. He kept it in the crinkle of his eyes and then moved on.

"Our senses were sharper. Night vision was poor, which made us seem vulnerable on dark planets like Saturn, but smell and hearing made up for it. Our strength was rivaled perhaps only by those on the planet Jupiter and even then when rage fueled us no one in the system could defeat us."

Apollo's eyes locked onto her again. "And rage often fueled us. Blinded us. Many chose to burn brightly and quickly than flicker out into nothing." He huffed out a breath that was a pained union of a scoff and a laugh, "If you do not know of them, it doesn't surprise me that they all are dead."

He rubbed the sand on his pale trousers. "But that is a lesser issue. More than your star affinity, if you have come here to the great planes, it means you have dominance over every planetary power within this system. It means you have the sunstone."

The what?

"The sunstone?"

"Yes, the special talisman of the sun."

"I already have the silver crystal." A silver crystal, a dream mirror, a holy grail, all artifacts that signaled the beginning of some new horrible chapter. Usagi could only imagine the new enemies that would come hunting for her now.

"That doesn't surprise me as the sole heir of Selene," his voice curved upward a bit, as if it was almost a question. As if he was asking if Selene had remarried, or rebonded after he passed.

It wasn't his business.

She refocused the conversation, "Why me?"

"Why not you? It was mine and when I passed it was my desire for you to have it and not the people of my star who would have abused its power." He looked so accomplished. She hated him for it in that moment.

Her voice dropped to a whisper. "You wished this upon me?"

"It is your birthright. I bestowed it upon you to manifest when you were of age."

Apollo shook his head and continued "You don't understand. The sunstone is not like the silver crystal. It does not care about good or evil. It is a manifestation of desire and will."

She only blinked in confusion.

Will? Was it her will to isolate herself from her friends? To be angry? To abuse her powers like that?

"It came to be in a space and time long before us," he stated simply.

"Long ago, before those on the sun were conquerors, we were conquered. Slaves to powers of bigger systems within our galaxy. There was no life on the other planets, our star was too dim to shine upon them. The sunstone was a collective concentration of our ancestors, a talisman that amplified our once collective dream of freedom."

"–But you call yourself emperor," freedom seemed to be a debt everyone else in the solar system paid.

"Power is a gourd riddled with holes, once you acquire enough to lose, your thirst for it will never be quenched."

Usagi's face was a mix of fear and confusion.

"Please. Let me show you", his hands hovered over hers, "May I?"

Again she nodded, but her head moved on its own. Her head was empty. The anxiety numbed her. Her muscles ached at the recollection of a "solar flare", her body literally breaking and remaking itself.

He took her hands in his and together their palms began to glow effervescent. Immediately he read her thoughts.

"You can not wish to see it. That doesn't will away its existence."

The glow grew as he continued. His tone softened. He spoke in whispers as if he was reciting something ancient.

"It amplifies feelings, emotions, desires and in the end truth. Unchecked, your highs can be addicting, your lows can be world shattering. You knew it was there. It knows it. It is your rawest nature. Your truest pursuit. If you do not know your own desires, the deepest levels of your own heart, then you will never master it."

Their hands continued to glow weakly. Nothing formed. Apollo continued to look at her palms. His voice cut right to her core. "Whether or not you want the power, you have it. You now can blame your mother and I for it. If you don't know what the power is, you won't be able to control it, and then you will be dangerous, you will eventually hurt others. I am sure suppressing it has already caused you enough pain."

Her mind flashed back to the wet pop of her bones breaking. Pain she would gladly do again if her friends could keep living their beautiful, normal, lives.

Haruka had made her angry. No, she had made herself angry. Had gotten overwhelmed. She should have stayed away. She would give them space and in time she would handle it, hide it, on her own.

She shook her head hard enough that her bangs ruffled. She didn't want to see it. Didn't want to believe that she was the sole inhabitant of yet another all powerful, once-in-a-million-lifetimes power source that some new evil would covet and try to steal from her at the risk of her life and the lives of everyone she loved.

"Take it back."

Usagi ripped her hands away and the light died between them.

This was all a very long, very detailed, dream.

"I can't take it back. I'm dead." Apollo said simply.

"Un-die. People do it all the time. I did it twice," she bolted up and started walking away from him.

Maybe there was someone else she could encounter. An enemy she could actually destroy. All of her ghosts seemed to haunt her future. The eight month fever she had was actually better than whatever new enemy this ceremony would resurrect.

Apollo was in front of her before she could plant her foot in the sand.

"You can't run away from this. It is your–"

She cut him off with the meanest look she could muster. It came across more exhausted than threatening.

"Don't. Don't say destiny. I've been destined enough. I'm not running, I'm walking away. I'm too hungry to run."

He remained where he was standing. She ducked to his right. He met her there.

"Move!"

Another power, another responsibility. A new awakening was always on the precipice of a new enemy. A newer bigger bad she had to defeat. Her future self had told her none of this, her past memories had been useless for this.

He continued to lecture her, "It is your power to do as you see fit. I was unaware of your reincarnation. Your deaths. Your sunsickness will only get worse the more you ignore it. The guiding memories will be nightmares that seep into your days. I don't want you to feel any more pain."

He was an emperor, he conquered, he had even killed. Not youma. Not evil. She knew he had killed living breathing people. She should have never tried to reason with him. He was right, he should be blamed, this was all his fault.

She shifted her weight onto her back leg like Makoto had tried to teach her so many mornings at the Hikawa Shrine.

He was a warrior. Her political books and the art of negotiation did not work with prehistoric magical beings. He understood force.

"I said move!" Usagi swung.

And missed.

She swung again and it was like trying to hit the wind. The moment before impact he was just out of reach.

She should have picked up sand to throw in his eyes during her journey to him instead of humming the riffs in Yaten's solo.

This went on for what felt like forever.

Every time, he backed away at the last second.

She didn't get tired, she got frustrated. And that frustration turned to anger, the anger to power. She continued swinging with more force.

"Everything you've said has rules only within this solar system. That's not how it works. That's not how any of it works anymore. We have enemies all over the galaxy. It was Queen Beryl first. She was just a priestess then, back in your day. There have been Queens and Princes and advisors trying to kill me and everyone I love since the first life, and in this life, and even in my next life."

She dropped and swept his feet. He simply jumped over them. Back to punches then.

"I will live a millenia and fight through all of it. And why?"

Another swing.

"Why me? Why did I get the Silver Crystal?"

A left hook, directed at his chin, blocked by his forearm.

Another barrage of punches, each deflected at the very last second.

He was taunting her.

Daring her to land a blow.

"Ami is smarter! Minako is more clever."

She threw a left hook and he sidestepped, nearly causing her to lose her balance. Usagi pivoted back to him and braced her hands on her knees, gulping air in. Her shirt was sticking to her skin in dark patches. The hairs around her temple curled in sweat.

"Rei is so much more determined."

Apollo stood before her with his arms back to their crossed position. The man who managed to block every attack was there, two steps away, not a wave of his perfectly blonde hair undisturbed.

"Makoto is stronger!"

Sweat was pooling at the small of her back, sand breaded every inch of exposed skin,her biceps were shot and Apollo looked almost bored.

He looked disinterested, and unimpressed, and was being extremely unhelpful. Anger, that emotion was quickly becoming more familiar to her.

Her voice came out sharp and ragged, "You don't even know who the hell I'm talking about! Because you weren't there. Neither of you. Two of the most powerful people in existence came together and then died. Just once. ' You look just like her'" she scoffed sharply, " Well I'm not her. It hurts my head to even remember her, to dig past three deaths to remember that life. Why did your wife, or bond, or whatever she was, bring me back and not you?"

Her bangs stuck to her forehead in clumps. Sweat salted her already glistening eyes.

"Why did she send just us to Earth and not herself? I'm sure she was tired of all this just like I am, so excuse me if I'm not more excited about a new target on my back. A new frigging, a new fucking rock to manage!"

The first tears were hot on her cheeks. That heat she felt this morning bubbled up in her chest. Vengeful? Dangerous? She could be both. She would be both. She channeled it into her hand.

She swung again, and this time it connected. He didn't move, but his hair was pushed back from his face at once as if by an invisible wind. Small mountains formed at the back of each of his feet in an effort to stay upright. He didn't look bored anymore. His face was unreadable, his eyes cold little jewels in that fox-like face.

Satisfaction was short-lived. Usagi pursed her lips to silence her moan. Something had definitely cracked, even if she could already feel it mending again. One of her buns dropped out of its already disheveled ball and covered half of her face. He hadn't said a word and so she continued in the longest conversation she had mustered since the end of the Chaos wars.

"A sunstone? One that answers my desires? My desires are to have no more powers at all. All they've done is wake up the evilest beings from all corners of the galaxy and bring them to my doorstep. I thought sunsickness was the mark of a new enemy. And I was right. It's you! I don't need all this power. Now we'll never have peace of mind. I don't want to be a warrior."

Usagi swung again and this time she knew he let it connect. He attempted to wrap his hand around her fist, she felt the brush of that healing warmth on his fingertips.

She snatched her hand back. She wanted to be angry. In fact she wanted to be furious. Anger numbed her. And no pain was as close to good as she could feel right now.

Her fist was was so tight her knuckles blanched. She could connect again. She could take him down and then figure out a way to escape this nightmare.

His voice was stern, "What do you actually want, Usagi?"

Her fist stopped in mid-air with a whoosh.

Her knuckles were bruised purple and already healing into a dark red.

What did she want? When was the last time someone had asked her that? Asked her instead of telling her what she should want, what she should do, how she should feel?

"I don't want… to fight." Her hand fell against her side like lead.

"I don't want to worry about my family and friends," Her voice cracked. "–not living to see tomorrow, while I live forever."

A sting in her nose told her the tears were on the way. She couldn't even attack without crying. Obviously Apollo would be disappointed in her. More than he already was. Of course she wasn't the warrior he had hoped her to be.

He looked down on her with those eyes that froze so cold they burned. Up close, so cold, she could no longer see the similarity.

"What do you want?" he repeated.

"I want a normal life for my friends. I want a normal life for myself. I want them to live their own lives, not worry about their 'duties', not worry about me and my happiness over their own."

She couldn't see anything through the tears and hair. Who cared if the ghostly apparition parent of her previous incarnation could see how weak she was?

Usagi could feel that broiling heat as he approached. He would win. He would win and she didn't care anymore.

"And I'm tired of feeling guilty for wanting my own life!" tears poured even more freely now.

Her hand flopped against his chest in something between a push and a slap.

"I don't want to be Empress of the Earth, or the Solar System, or whatever." A sob ripped through her so hard her back arched to force more air in her lungs.

The soft fabric of his tunic twisted under her fingers. "I want us all to be free of it. From all of the sacrifice."

In between her hands, his bare chest exposed that scarred flesh of his scar. It was a contusion of raised skin caused by something that had burned and sliced. It must have been so painful. She cried for them both.

"I want to live without feeling like every misstep dishonors the kingdoms before me. Mine and there's. The lives they lost, the loyalty they've given, the dreams they've pushed back."

When would Ami get the chance to be a doctor, or Rei to take over the shrine, or Minako to be an idol? How could Makoto, whose dream was to be a bride, bear to see her engagement ring knowing Sailor Soldiers were forbidden to marry?

She didn't deserve them.

Their love, their loyalty, she didn't deserve any of it.

"I don't even want it", she whispered, shocked and disgusted by her own revelation. Her hands creeped back to her face. She covered her teary eyes in shame.

There were terrible thoughts she never dared acknowledge, much less speak aloud. She loved them. Truly, she loved them more than her own life, but…

"Their love is an anchor, but sometimes it feels so heavy. Sometimes…I wish they were just my friends instead of my Sailor Warriors." Her voice dropped so low only Apollo's heightened senses could pick up the sound.

"Sometimes I wish we weren't Sailor Senshi at all"

There. There it was. As much as she loved them, she would give anything for them to just be normal girls, with normal lives. To venture off from the path carved in front of them without consequence.

The chest she had wanted to pummel was now the wall in which she held herself up with.

He brought his arms from his sides and held onto her elbows. He brought her hands down and kept them there.

Her face was splotchy and red. Her eyes were swollen. The sea sweet taste of tears, sweat, and snot dripped over her chapped lips.

She was neither as strong nor as beautiful as either of her parents.

"What do you want from me?"her voice was fragmented by heavy breaths.

"I'm here to help you."

His arms crossed over her back and this time she didn't slink away when Apollo, her father, hugged her.

She sunk into his body. She felt that warm flowing power leak from his arms and leaned into it. Her legs gave out and he held like a broken doll with his forearms.

His voice was barely audible over her own labored breathing. "I've known people to live centuries, give speeches to multitudes, and still not speak the truth of their hearts."

It took effort to keep her close and rest his chin on her head. "You are so brave," he whispered.

In his warm embrace, she hiccuped as he tapped a slow beat onto her back that her breathing fell into. When her tears finally stopped, his low voice spoke to her.

"There were many times, I told your mother of the living planets past the farthest asteroid belts. Planets where life could be sustained, and the only things that bled were fruits. There were many times when I would lie awake counting the people I would kill to make that possible for us. And in all of that time I asked your mother to do it just once. To leave it all behind. To go somewhere far, far, away."

Her head was buried in the soft fabric of his shirt and tilted upward as if to ask why he didn't.

"Your mother told me, 'If not us, then who?'. If not two of the most powerful people in this galaxy, then who else? If not a blessed pair: one who could destroy armies, and another who could heal planets, who else?"

He shook his head, as if still not agreeing with his lover.

"Many people in my time lost their families to blight, or senseless war, or even plain bad luck. An arrow through the chest due to mistaken identity. A father named a deserter and his family killed per sacred law. You have gone over the edge of life's frontier and brought everyone back with you."

He was smiling now, that smile he had when she had told him of her titles. Those sharp teeth sparkled in the light.

"You mention your enemies and they are all defeated. You talk of your allies? All survivors. All living."

He pointed to his right eye, "My first fight on the battlefield gave me this scar", his hand trailed down to the raised strip over his adams apple, "My own brother is responsible for this one."

"To live is to fight. Your battles only seem endless because you know you have the power to win each one. Many people see evil and cower, or simply pretend it doesn't exist. Evil sees you and fears you, it chips away because even chaos knows you are the calm."

He stepped back to lift her chin forward.

Eye to eye with a killer, and perhaps a savior, he spoke to something deep within her: "You are not at war with any enemy. You are at war with yourself."

The words would have brought her to her knees if he wasn't already holding her up.

"I won't tell you it's wrong to run away. I have felt the urge to do so many times. I have been afraid." Hands that held her up gripped her even tighter. "Fear is the combined debt of a lack of information and lack of confidence. You are my greatest feat. You are stronger than I am. If you wanted to, you could have punched a hole through my undead chest. I am here to provide information, and I hope that will give you the strength to continue on. I hope to show the way to tame sunstone and if you practice you will have the power to end wars before they can even begin."

"It is not rest," his eyes shined when they looked at her "eternal or otherwise, but it is the best I can offer you."

Apollo gently took her hand and tapped it over his sternum. At the intersection of his x-marked scar he tapped the same steady rhythm he played onto her back. "When you feel more chaos than calm, search your heart for the why."

He continued to tap and she felt the warming calm again like sinking into a warm bath.

"The how will be anger, or excitement, it can manifest in many ways, get to the why and breathe through it. Accepting it is how you center yourself. How you tame the beast. You do not have to have the answers, at times there is simply enough power in knowing the question."

He took her other hand and drew her to her feet.

Their overlapped palms began to glow and a gem began to form in the space between them. It was round rock no bigger than a peach pit. The edges were brown and glassy and in the core, she squinted to see better, the core was the solar system. Crowded around the edges were the planets, Earth, Venus, Mars, there were all there, spinning in their own revolutions. Small specks compared to a bright orange sun that took up a disproportionate amount of space, making the stone look completely orangish-white from a distance.

In all of its beauty there was one flaw.

A tiny shard, not thicker than a thread, missing.

Her tears already formed at the brim of her eyes. "Is it broken?"

"Nothing about you is broken," his voice was steady, though his eyes were searching, pondering over that missing sliver.

Apollo answered for her again, "I did not know it could be fragmented. It may have happened in the transfer. We do not have to have all the answers."

Of course, even supernatural puberty had to have a new spin with her.

For fuck's sake.

The stone had disappeared into her chest with a warm pulse. There was no malice, only exhaustion in her voice when she pulled out of his arms and hugged herself.

She rubbed a mixture of tears and sweat off her face. She felt a little lighter, even though she would never admit it. The nap after all of this was over would be glorious. "You said I'm here for answers. It feels like I'm going to leave with more questions."

"I'm not the best storyteller. I told you that was your mother. It's easier if I show you," he nodded his chin at her clothing, "It seems like a lot of time has passed since I've been around."

"It has." she closed her mouth before retorts could spill out. He had held her while she had told him things she had never told herself. She shuddered. Things she would unpack later. She would try her hardest to be pleasant, if only to get her answers and leave her father without more guilt weighing her down.

"It is about desire. What you need to see, you will see. The sunstone does not control you, you control it, outside of its destruction. I had it for three centuries."

"Aren't you supposed to be…" she tilted her head at the man reeking of ancient power behind his incredibly youthful face. "How old are you?"

"I died at about 332 Earthen years. I've been dead for a long long time. I know that much. I've only been here," his hand swept towards the expansive field, "for a little while. "Waiting for you I think, after that I'll be gone."

Somehow this had been her fault too. She sucked in a breath, it had been more than half a year ago when she first had the symptoms. Her eyes were too swollen to well again. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know you were waiting. I didn't know, well I knew something, but I swear I didn't even know you existed."

"You do not have to apologize. It is I that should beg forgiveness for not being there when you first needed me. I cannot imagine what it was like to have sunsickness not knowing what it is. Sun humanoids on other planets have died, very painfully, trying to navigate it on their own. But I am here because you need me now. Even if we are both a little late." He laughed again, this time with bitterness.

She could feel the calluses on his palms as they cradled the sides of her face.

"I don't know what it will show you, but it will be what you need to see."

Her mind was rushed away before she could even form a response.

He–well they–were standing on a balcony. She had spent many mornings on her own balcony in Juuban, except here there was no quiet suburban street. Instead, before them was a sea of pearl colored flowers. The field stretched past the horizon, which gave way to space.

Space, stars, and breathstilling view of the Earth, which looked like a precious marble. Their hand reached out as if they could touch it. That swirling orb of veridian and cerulean. The sound of rustling turned their head away from the object of their desire toward the inner room.

Selene lay on her side, and at the sight of her, in a modest silk robe, she could hear the deep voice she recognized as her father's sigh with contentedness.

"I thought I would let you sleep for a while longer," he walked and she could hear the metal clang of his armor as he moved.

The bedroom was large enough to house a small family.

The curtain parted and Queen Serenity's silver hair shimmered lilac in the moonlight. It spilled from the bed to the floor as her tiny foot stepped onto the warmed marble. She peaked past the translucent cloth of the canopy. Her eyes were lidded but a small smile graced her lips. Hair tousled and skin pale as snow, as if she had tumbled from some ancient storybook and suddenly been awakened by his voice.

"I didn't think I would see you until another full cycle." Her voice echoed beneath their breastplate. For a woman who looked so young her voice was deep. Full.

The room was sparsely decorated. The bed was the only furniture, massive as it was. It was a four canopy bed curtained in the most ornate lace. Pillows of every size littered the right half of the bed, as if mimicking the shape of a person. On the wall was the only other piece of furniture. A giant silver mirror. Flowers masterfully crafted the border in painstakingly detailed bouquets. She could see Selene's reflection in it as she gracefully stepped out of her cocoon.

Usagi saw her father's reflection in the mirror as he approached her. His golden hair was bound tightly at his neck with a few strands slipping from its leather bind. He was dressed in a combination of golden and maroon armor, all of it marred with dirt, and darker bits of matter that suggested much worse.

She sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for him. He dropped to his knees before her and, as if she had done so many times before, she pulled the band from his hair and began to run her fingers through it, humming softly. Usagi watched her father's eyes as he looked at the scene from the mirror.

Selene was dressed in a modest white robe. What must've been expensive silk was being soiled by the dirt he had dragged in from whatever battle he had just been in.

They looked so different from each other.

They looked so complete with each other.

One of her delicate fingers flittered over his face and tapped on the bridge of his nose. Usagi felt a twinge of pain. "The bones were crushed," Selene said knowingly.

"I had a healer set it before I left for here. I didn't have enough energy to heal it myself and I didn't want you to see me like that."

A memory within a memory flickered. Her father had caught a shield to the face. The right quadrant of his face was caved in.

Selene made a sound that communicated acknowledgement and returned to humming. She ran a finger along the bridge and the pain was completely gone.

Her hands expertly removed springs of grass, twigs, and other particles that littered his hair.

"And yet you could not bathe before you arrived?" Her voice lightened to a teasing tone.

He turned. His face was away from the mirror and now looking up at her. "I have a sneaking suspicion you like seeing me dirty. We can bathe together if you haven't already–"

He paused. Moving his chin from its position on her thigh to nuzzle into her mother's stomach. He sniffed like a dog. Selene smelled like lavender and sweet things.

She really hoped that her first vision didn't involve having to watch her first parents have sex.

Apollo continued sniffing, burying his face in Selene's lower abdomen. She giggled. It sounded like the lightest of windchimes.

He stood, suddenly sweeping her up in his arms. "A baby?" His voice cracked when he spoke.

Suddenly his thoughts flooded her mind. Who had she told first? Was it him? No, it was probably Luna and maybe even Artemis. He knew those two cats were more than advisors, more like Selene's siblings, and still the stain of jealousy spread. He would not have another male, feline or otherwise, be around his child more than he was.

Selene silvery eyes were warm. Her soft smile widened tentatively. "It was only confirmed during the end of the last moon cycle. Luna is the only one who told me. I wanted to tell you first." She drew a small circle on his chest plate.

"You know I am the last of my kind. We only have one heir per lifetime and when it didn't happen after the first decade of our coupling, even after I had gone to the galaxy cauldron and chosen a star seed…I didn't think it was possible."

She looked up at him, and in her eyes Usagi saw a tenderness she hadn't felt possible. A love on the other side of fear. Unbridled by anything. Capable of anything.

"A baby." Apollo whispered. Pride beamed in his words, yet when she saw him sit her mother ever so gently down on the bed, she felt the tremor in his muscles. He was a warrior, fresh off the battlefield. The shake was not from fatigue. It was something else.

He kneeled before her and took her hands in his. "I have never even left this room with you." He looked toward the balcony overlooking Earth, "We are the two most powerful people on this side of the galaxy, and we lay together in secrecy, as if in shame."

He spat the last word out like it hurt him to speak it. "I am a warrior and yet I have not even had the courage to walk outside these doors and take you to the palace where you belong. Where you should sit beside me on the golden throne."

"Apollo," her voice was a whisper.

She could feel his thoughts racing and names running through his mind. Arkan, Pecadus, Morta, the council. Were they people he would have to inform of her birth?

She felt the vein in his neck bulge as the bitter taste of anger spread like liquor in his chest.

Usagi knew then there would be people who he would aim to kill. Kill to protect her and her mother.

His skin started to heat. His body became encased in a soft glow.

"You say we cannot leave, not to the Sun Kingdom, not away from all this. If we are not free, then we are trapped. We are prisoners!" his voice echoed off the milky walls.

"Apollo."

He would kill them all for her.

"Apollo. Come back to me." Usagi felt a gentle hand on their chest. Apollo put his hand over Selene's and she felt that warm glow from before. Selene started a gentle tap. This time she felt the sunstone underneath their hands, below the muscle of flesh, felt it rolling as if it was another organ, felt it finally still.

You are the calm. That's what Apollo had told her. Maybe the vision was trying to show how to control the stone.

His large hands dwarfed hers when he engulfed them to continue the beat. For a few moments there was only their synchronized breathing and the tap of their hands on his armor.

"I have not had time to recenter after the battle." His eyes glistened in the moonlight. "You have given me my greatest joy and I will do anything", his gaze dropped to her stomach, " anything to protect you both."

Selene cupped his hands around his face. Her palms were cool to the touch. "Your kingdom is one of tradition, and though I do not agree with all of them, it is one I have come to respect. My powers have caused enough battles, enough wars. I refuse to have my presence be used by your nephew as an excuse to create more carnage."

She took his hand and placed them over the flat muscle of her stomach, "I refuse to have our child born into violence–", she brushed her lips over his, "–when they were created with such love."

Apollo looked up and Usagi's heart sank with the heaviness of the feelings that raced through her. He would destroy everyone for Selene and her. In him flowed a love so consuming that logic could not encompass it. In those pale eyes framed with silver, wet with conviction, the feeling was reflected. It was a cord between them. A rope thick with love and promise and sacrifice. Gilded with patience and practice and tested.

Love had all kinds of flavors, bitter and dormant, sweet and new. This love that shined so clearly between them was different. A love that would stand the test of eternity, and would have if only their bodies had permitted them. A love that manifested itself in her survival over and over again. It operated in its own space, its own dimension. She had felt such an all consuming fire before.

Prince Endymion and Princess Serenity.

They had that kind of love. It had been born in the Silver Millenium and died in that battle on the moon, probably not far from the very spot her parents now communed.

That love was a song, and she had been living in its requiem ever since.

Though she had heard a note, felt a trickle of the ocean that submerged them before.

Selene gripped the sides of his face, there was tenderness, and also need.

There was love, and there was being in love. These two were living in it, in the cocoon they had formed for themselves.

"You are my center–" Apollo breathed.

"–And you surround me." Selene wrapped her arms around his neck and he stepped toward the bed.

The vision faded into starlight.

She came back first. The green sky and the field of sand were just as she had left it.

Apollo was still in the memory. For a moment his eyes were whited out, his hands still reaching out as if he could touch her. In a blink, his hands were back at his sides, back to the composed warrior.

His mood swings were still jarring, even after she had been in his head. Was the sunstone making her like that too? Or was that just him?

"You still doubted I was your father." The blue had come back to his eyes, they were rimmed in silver.

"I believed…" she thought of his words before, that his people celebrated truth. "—I did doubt. My mother never took another…bond, and sometimes in my memory she did wear a ring, but she never mentioned you. No one did. But I believe it now. I know you loved her, and she loved you."

Her thoughts roamed to the bouquet of red roses sitting on her kitchen table. The truth of her lineage was easier to believe than she had previously thought. It was the other message that rattled her. What the sunstone, or what she truly wanted that the sunstone was trying to make her see was ridiculous.

She asked him a question she'd rather not ask herself, "What will you do now?"

Apollo waved his large hand; it was transparent at the wrist.

"I will go to the beyond. I have been away for a long time. Now I wish to be with her." He gulped, and the shadow of fear swept past it. There he was a scared boy again. He was really two people crammed into one body. "I promised your mother the last time I saw her that I would return to her side soon. I wish to fulfill that promise. I hope to be reincarnated with her."

Usagi didn't know how the man from the memories: a hot-tempered tyrant by day and doting lover by night ever courted her mother. In fact, she didn't even know her mother. She had been comparing herself to her Selene, and Neo-Queen Serenity, without ever really knowing either of them. Maybe the memories would show her the former, when she needed to see it.

Still it was a tragic love. A genre she was all too familiar with. How had fate been so cruel to keep them apart for so long?

Apollo reached out and brushed her bangs. "I prayed to the Sun that you would not be a girl. I knew if you were a girl you would put the same spell on me that your mother did. And now if it is my gift to maybe see her again, just as it is my gift in seeing you, I would be even more blessed. I had asked for just a little more time, and I have gotten it at long last."

She felt the pressure of his hand, but the tips were translucent. She had needed a good cry and now she felt as though she might truly run out of tears. Her vision blurred at the thought this would be her first and last time seeing him.

Apollo lifted a beading tear from her eye, "You have already granted me the gift of seeing your mother again. It would be a great kindness to know you."

And so she told him about her battles. Her deaths. All of them. And those of her soldiers. She rushed through the enemies as if ticking names of a list. Twisted queens like Beryl, Metallia, Nehalania. Obsessed princes, evil scientists, enchanted circuses. All in two earth years and ending with the biggest bad: Chaos. He listened to it all. Shocked with recognition of infamous names like Princess Nehelenia and shuddering in disgust at the mention of Chaos.

He told her of her flares. How the transformation in the grass was breaking her body down to build it up into the body composition of a Sun humanoid. That physical training would be the best way to suppress flares, get out her frustrations, but mental training, deep meditation, would be the way to quell them almost completely, and hopefully end her splits.

When that was done she told the man who seemed as unlikely a royal as her, her father, about Earth. About video games, airplanes, and manga. It took a while, and eventually he understood the great invention that was the ice cream sundae.

Both his hands were now faded to the elbow.

"If you think I am strong, You have no idea of your own power," he smiled with such gentleness at her. She had wondered how he could flip from hot to cold. To compress such opposites in one body. Maybe it was no compression. Maybe he truly was both and felt no need to conform.

"My memories are at your disposal. What you wish to see, will be yours. Now that they have transferred, your split visions should stop. I will say now…I have done things I am not proud of. You are a warrior of legend, if you had met the worst of me…I could be considered one of the villains you mentioned."

She snorted, "You are human. I have met worse."

"Then I hope you give yourself the same grace," he countered.

Maybe he was more of a politician than she gave him credit for, "I feel like you set me up for that one."

He smiled broadly.

"I was nearly three centuries old when I ruled. I could barely save myself, speak less of my planet. You have been in this life for only seventeen years. The sun people were incredibly arrogant. I was incredibly arrogant. Our pride was the noose we hanged ourselves with, but it was also the pedestal which we climbed to achieve great things."

He put a clear hand on her cheek, and she cradled it there. "Do not underestimate yourself. As you are now, you are perhaps the most powerful being in this solar system, maybe in this galaxy. No one, except you, can decide what you will do."

Half of his chest had completely disappeared.

He sighed, "If I may be selfish, let me ask for one last favor."

Apollo reached out what was left of his arm, just a little of flesh above his shoulder. The scar on his right eye crinkled again. This must have been the same face he gave Selene. The look he had given her, his daughter, when she was just a few weeks into existence in her mother's womb. She was already on her tippy toes when his nearly transparent frame scooped her up into another crushing hug.

****

"It smells like boy in here." Healer's nose wrinkled as she dropped her hand from his throat.

His stomach loosened and he exhaled a breath, glad it was only air and not blood passing through his lips. He felt strong, not Sailor Starlight strong though.

Maker had not moved from her position. He could see her pupils darting wildly, rapidly assessing the situation.

"It is a boy." She took a step closer and waved a translucent violet screen in the air. A light beamed from the screen, and scanned Seiya's body. Words appeared in glowing writing as the scan finished at his feet. Maker snatched the tablet out of the air and got closer. Healer swiveled to move out of the way, still utterly unamused by the whole display.

Maker looked at the notes on the violet screen and at Seiya again. "That is not Sailor Star Fighter."

Healer immediately put her palm out in front of her.

"Don't!"

Maker tossed the screen at Healer who caught it with one hand, her other still focused on Seiya's chest.

Seiya was now crouched between them. Realistically if Healer let out a power beam, he would be incinerated on the spot. All he could do was crouch.

Kakyuu tapped Maker on the shoulder, gesturing to move him aside. "Maker, we are not all blessed with that beautiful brain of yours. Tell us, who is this person."

"Height: 180cm, Hair: Black, Eyes: Blue, Race: 95% Kinmoku Humanoid, 5% Unknown." The scientist in her tried not to get excited at that five percent. Something was definitely different about this Seiya from the one she had encountered on Earth. She wouldn't rest until she got to the bottom of it.

"Seiya Kou?" Princess Kakyuu questioned. Her hands were clasped behind her back. "if he is here, where is Sailor Star Fighter?"

Seiya put both his hands up, "She's still here! I'll bring her back, I just wanted to explain!"

"Well the floor is yours," Maker had her notebook out and a pen at the ready.

Seiya told them everything he knew. From the scene at the fire temple to his evening in Nehreen.

"So what you know is a whole lot of nothing," Healer concluded. She'd been frowning ever since he appeared.

Maker closed her notebook and the visor reappeared. "We'll need more tests to be sure."

Princess Kakyuu simply gathered her cards again. Maker saw her eyes linger on future card, the card she did not show them.

"The questions multiply and the answer remains the same. Maker, clear my morning schedule. Healer, as I was saying, bring me my scroll. The cards have already told me what I must do. A royal wedding invitation is surely in order."

CHAPTER END