Lexa vs Bellamy part 2. Lexa has an unexpected- and uncomfortable- encounter. Clarke must admit a bitter truth.
xxxxx
Can you believe this fic will be a year old this week?! wow I should come up with an idea to celebrate the occasion...
if you have any questions or simply wanna chat find me on Tumblr as Moreorlez ^^
Since the early morning hours, the different clan leaders and their respective entourages started arriving in Polis; which meant Clarke was for the most part busy… busy enough not to notice what Lexa was up to.
…
Bellamy is packing his knapsack with the few things he had brought - realizing he wouldn't be staying as long as he imagined – when he senses someone's presence. He turns around cautiously, encountering Lexa leaning against the wall with her arms crossed.
"You are aware Clarke will kill me if she sees you here, right?" He states as a sort of warning.
"Oh, is that so?" Lexa sneers, "should I call her then?"
"Whatever," Bellamy resumes his packing "say what you have to say and leave before I call the guards."
"I doubt they will come to your rescue," Lexa shrugs.
Giving up on his task and again facing the young brunette Bellamy asks, "so are you gonna kill me now?"
"Oh, I want to. I could … it would be so easy." Lexa confesses unrestrained "but after some thought I decided you must live and endure the consequences of your actions."
Bellamy frowns not liking Lexa's judgmental tone. "I don't know what the hell they said to you but you have no idea what you're talking about; you are a kid, you don't understand." He tries to minimize what Lexa is implying.
Lexa wants to refute his statement, to say she knows every single detail, to yell at him that she was there; she saw with her own eyes the lifeless bodies of her innocent people on the field, that she cried in silence the atrocity and absurdity of their deaths, that her heart still constricts at the memory of it all. But there's no point, Lexa doesn't really want to get into an argument with the man, besides she finds him not worthy of knowing the power of the spirits and the gift they offered to her. She glares at him in silence, her eyes saying more than she ever could.
"What is it that you're looking for?" Bellamy demands, "Clarke's throne? Her complete trust and devotion?" He shakes his head in disapproval and complements "Well at least those last two you have already so leave me alone."
Once again Lexa finds herself wanting to call out on all of Bellamy's stupid accusations but ignores it in favor of letting him know what is exactly on her mind. "Clarke may have forgiven you but I haven't, nor has the innocent blood of my people."
"Get the hell out of here" Bellamy suddenly exclaims.
Taking notice that she is indeed touching a nerve, Lexa continues. "What? You afraid of admitting your crimes?" She advances toward him provokingly. "Do their innocent faces haunt you at night? Does the weight of their souls hang over your conscious?
"Guards!" Bellamy yells having enough. "GUARDS!"
"There's no point!" Lexa remarks with anger. "They are not here to protect you; they are here to protect us from you."
When none of the guards respond to his call, Bellamy runs to the door and swings it open; only to find the guards are gone. He stands at the threshold- with his back to Lexa -grasping the door with frustration, debating whether to leave or just confront the girl; wondering what else she is going to…
"I heard that you married a grounder, that you are a father now."
Bellamy tenses at the words, never expecting the girl to mention his family; not having a clue where she is going with this. But it is too late to back down now, so he slowly turns around, facing Lexa; his features hardened.
"Tell me Bellamy of the Sky people when you look at your family do you remember the faces of those you killed mercilessly?" Lexa prods stepping closer, almost face to face with him, "is that why you married a grounder in the first place? To find absolution?"
There is no need for Bellamy to say what he is thinking, his expression reveals exactly the mixture of remorse, shame and rage that is inside of him.
Pleased that she has him exactly where she wanted, Lexa charges. "Well I hope every time you see them smile and grow older you remember the ones you deprived with those same privileges. Every time you stare into their eyes I want you to remember the faces of those who died by your hands…"
Bellamy gulps, his fists tight against his body in contained fury and impotence; hoping he isn't being too obvious with his emotions. He wants so badly to hush her but, how can he? When everything she is saying hits home; making him question things he never really asked himself before. A storm of thoughts blows through his mind evoking memories he had long buried deep in the corners of his brain.
"… I hope you will always hear their voices inside your head, as they shall never be silent… and if you ever dare to try, have no doubt I will be close by to remind you." Having said that Lexa pushes past Bellamy, exiting the room but before she completely disappears she cranes her neck to the side giving Bellamy a sidelong glance and mutters. "Don't you ever forget Sky man, whether you like it or not your wife and kids are grounders, my blood… my people."
It is not until Bellamy hears Lexa's steps fading away that he closes the door and drags his sudden heavy body to the bed. He sits on the edge of the mattress staring blankly at the wall for several minutes. For a moment there he forgets about his present, his family, his wife; only images of the night he and Pike killed all those grounders flash in front of his eyes. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" Bellamy mumbles in the emptiness of the room as his head falls onto his hands in desperation, he clutches tightly to it with eyes closed, disgusted and angry with himself. "I'm sorry" he repeats once again with despair in his voice. Finally, tired of keeping it inside he lets the emotion pour out of him – like he did only once before in the arms of Myrreh- and cries out loud.
….
"The Sky people chancellor Marcus Kane." The guard announces at the door of the throne room, signaling for the guest to enter.
"Commander," Kane greets on bended knee.
Clarke nods at him and then signals to the guard to leave the premises.
Kane stands up when he hears the doors close behind him and walks toward the throne.
"Marcus," Clarke descends the steps and meets the man half way.
"It's been a while," Kane embraces Clarke in a loving hug.
After they pull away, Indra comes in and welcome's the man too. "It's so nice to see you Kane" she extends her arm, a smile on her face.
"Hey there, my friend," Kane responds with the same sentiment. "I must confess I've really missed you and our long talks, do you think there's a way to fix that?"
"Hm," Indra arks a brow in mock consideration "perhaps we can have a drink after the meeting and catch up?" She offers mischievously; using sky people's terminology.
"I would love that" Kane grins in complicity.
With their friendly reunion settled Indra politely retreats to her position to give them some privacy.
"I heard congratulations are in order," Kane points out teasingly.
Clarke chuckles looking over to the side, blushing; but she recovers quickly. "Um, thanks; and I'm sure you have something to say about the matter," she remarks defensively.
"Well…" Kane purses his lips, "I do have a question if you don't mind."
Before Clarke has a chance to object, the query Markus presents catches her off guard.
"Are you happy?"
"Uh." Clarke blinks the surprise out of herself, confused as to whether he is being serious or not. But when she sees the honest concern in his eyes she feels confident enough to reply. "Yes, I actually am."
"Good," Kane offers a kind smile; placing a hand on Clarke's shoulder. "That's all that matters to me."
It is a relief for Clarke to have this kind of support, especially coming from a man who in many ways has been a father figure in her life. She gives Kane a shy smile in gratitude but refrains from making any comment.
"So where's Bellamy?" Kane suddenly asks remembering the man was already in Polis.
"Um." Clarke can't help the switch in her mood at the mention of her meddlesome friend. "He is in his room, he won't be taking part in the meeting I'm afraid."
The tone of finality in Clarke's voice is what causes Kane not to go further with the topic, guessing that something bad must have happened. "Oh well, I will see him later then," he clears his throat and changes the topic. "I hope you can find some time in your busy schedule to have dinner with me and your mother later tonight."
"Mo-mom is here?!"
…
"Hey," Abby knocks on Bellamy's open door, lifting a brow when she finds him reading a book in bed.
"Abby," Bellamy rapidly adopts a sitting position. "I didn't know you were coming."
"Yeah, it was a last minute decision," she shrugs as she walks closer to Bellamy. Then she looks behind her and using a softer tone she enquires, "what's with all that?"
"You don't wanna know," Bellamy replies bitterly knowing she is evidently referring to the guards.
"What?" Abby gets curious "what happened" she demands.
Bellamy releases a long deep sigh, preparing for what he is about to disclose. "Look Abby, I'm just gonna give you a piece of advice," he leans his body closer to the woman and in all seriousness, he adds, "if you don't want to get on Clarke's bad side leave the girl alone."
Abby opens her mouth to question what he is referring to but Bellamy carries on.
"Whatever you had planned to do or say to Lexa, just forget it; let her be," he pauses, lost in thought for a second before finalizing, "cause if you don't Clarke will make your life a living hell and I can assure you, she means it this time."
She can't really put a finger on it, but Abby could swear she sees fear in Bellamy's eyes at the warning; a very rare occurrence, particularly concerning Clarke. And as curious as she is she clearly realizes it is not a good time to interrogate the man. "Alright." Abby nods with a soft smile of understanding. "I'm gonna leave you to it then." She takes a few steps back until she reaches the exit, "if you need me I'll be at the clinic." With that she leaves Bellamy's room determined to find out what exactly happened to leave him in that state.
…
"It's just a small cut," Esiry protests while pressing the open wound on her hand.
"I know, but we better have it checked out," Lexa insists. "Besides, I'm sure Octavia will have something to say if her second doesn't take care of herself."
"Please…" Esiry whines as they near the door of the clinic as she knows what to expect there.
Lexa ignores her pleas and pushes her through the clinic's entrance.
"Nightblood!" The young healer in charge of receiving patients yells as soon as he spots the girls at the door.
Two other healers come rushing toward them.
"What happened?"
"Are you in pain?"
Esiry rolls her eyes at the excessive –and unnecessary- attention she's getting. It's always been like that and she's kind of sick of it; one of the disadvantages of being a Nightblood. "I'm fine," she replies curtly as the healers guide her to one of the rooms in the clinic.
Lexa walks behind them not intending on leaving Esiry alone.
"Doctor," the girl healer calls from the threshold "cut on the hand, bleeding has ceased. It's a Nightblood," she alerts for good measure.
"Oh a Nightblood." The doctor leaves the pad on which she was typing some data and faces the visitors. "Come here" she directs knowing the protocol and urgency in which she must attend to this special type.
"Doctor Griffin!" Esiry lets out excitedly.
"Hello there, and what's your…" she looks up to address the girl but also takes notice of someone else. "Lexa" she expels with disbelief.
"Do-Doctor Griffin." Lexa greets with shyness and dread, never expecting to encounter the woman.
"Jok." Esiry murmurs to herself suddenly remembering the connection.
Abby shakes the initial surprise from her head and goes back to attending physician mood. "Ok, what do we have here." She takes Esiry's hand and inspects it carefully. "It's a relatively deep cut on the back of the hand, no tendon seems to be compromised; it needs some attention but nothing to be concerned about." Abby finishes by giving Esiry a reassuring smile. "The healers can take care of it just fine." She directs the last comment to the couple who brought Esiry in.
"Yeah, come with us please," the guy instructs taking Esiry carefully by the arm.
Lexa moves to the side allowing the trio to pass and is about to follow them when she hears Abby's voice.
"Lexa, may I have a word with you, please?"
It makes the teen stop dead in her tracks, a cold shiver running down her spine. The only encouragement she receives before facing the woman alone is Esiry's silent "good luck" look as she disappears down the hallway. Having no other choice and with a heavy heart Lexa makes her way back to Abby.
Abby rearranges herself in the chair and clears her throat, waiting for Lexa to get comfortable before starting. "So, you and Clarke huh?"
Lexa fights the urge to squirm in the intimidating presence of the woman in front of her. 'She just wants to talk there's nothing wrong, just relax, you can handle it.' She succeeds in maintaining a sober exterior as she continues to stay upright, hands behind her back in the middle of the room. "Yes, we are officially dating ma'am" Lexa responds honestly.
"Hmm." Abby nods, in contemplation, "good for you."
"Thank you, Doctor Griffin." Lexa welcomes the good wishes not bothering to wonder if they are sincere or if there is something else she wants to say. But she doesn't have to keep guessing.
"You know, although I'm aware Clarke is the one with the position of authority and the responsibility for making the relationship official rested on her shoulders; I would've appreciated it if you would've taken some time to let me know about the seriousness of your involvement." Abby chastises tactfully adding in the process, "cause she may be the Commander Lexa but at the end of the day she's still my daughter."
No matter how prepared Lexa felt for the woman's queries or possible attacks; she wasn't expecting the statement just presented to her. She has no other choice than to concede, "you're right Doctor Griffin, I apologize for not informing you personally about the nature of my relationship with Clarke."
"It's alright," Abby seems pleased with the admission, but she is far from done, "and since we're already here; we may as well get to know each other better." She manages to make it sound more like a threat than an invitation.
"Uh," Lexa gulps unsure of what to do next. It's not like she can dismiss the woman like she did with Bellamy or Octavia whenever they attempted to pry into her personal affairs; this is Clarke's mother we are talking about- probably the only person with the right to question Lexa's intentions.
"Where were you born? What did you do back in your hometown?" Abby asks with interest.
Despite her best efforts to reply to the questions with poise, Lexa comes to realize she lacks the same confidence she had when she was Heda - in front of Abby at least. It was so easy to look at the doctor with her chin up and able to turn her back on anyone she pleased; her position of power granted her that boldness. But now she was simply a teenager standing in front of her girlfriend's mother, who evidently was concerned and just wanted information regarding a girl she knows nothing about and pretends to share her life with her daughter. 'For the holy spirits Lexa, say something!' Lexa is trying to force herself to come up with words.
"Abby, you are here!"
A voice comes from the hallway; breaking into the tension.
"Hey," Abby reluctantly greets the intruder.
"General," Lexa addresses Octavia with relief.
"Where's Esiry, is she alright?" Octavia directs the question to both Lexa and Abby.
It only takes a couple of seconds for Abby to guess who she is referring to. "The Nightblood?" When Octavia nods she updates, "I already took a look at her, she's gonna be fine; she's currently being tended to by the healers."
"Oh good!" Octavia sighs relieved. "Lexa" she calls out to the teen who stands at attention, "you'll keep an eye on Esiry for me and make sure she's well rested. I need to go back to the tower soon and probably won't be available until tomorrow morning. Come with me."
"Yes General." Lexa begins to walk away, turning briefly toward Abby to bid her farewell, "ma'am."
"I'll see you later!" Octavia waves at Abby before leaving the premises.
Once again alone, Abby leans her body on the backrest of the chair with frustration. "Damn it!" She curses her luck and the missed opportunity. 'I have to know more about this girl, I have to find a way.'
…
Outside and already far away from the doctor, Octavia warns. "OK from now on, you better watch your back, try to stay away from Abby as much as possible if you don't want to be interrogated."
"Wait!" Lexa stops abruptly, "that was on purpose? Clarke sent you to rescue me from her mother?"
"Yes." Octavia confirms but quickly adds "and before you start whining about how Clarke is being overprotective and shit, believe me you needed the escape; Abby can be a royal pain in the ass when she wants." The General rolls her eyes reminiscing how stubborn and nosy the woman could be, "besides we don't really know what she wants from you, so best thing you can do is wait until she's gone before thinking on going back to the tower"
If she had any objections, Lexa doesn't let it be known, she simply nods; secretly glad she doesn't have to deal with Clarke's mother in the near future. "OK."
"Now take me to Esiry, there are some things I need to say to that overexcited second."
…
The meeting went smoothly as expected; all clan leaders agreed the new law made complete sense and in a matter of minutes they all approved it and signed the required paperwork.
Clarke was relieved the meeting was over, at the same time she dreaded the ending because it meant she was free to meet up with her mother; not that she didn't miss the woman, but given the circumstances she knew what the topic was going to be about and was quite tired of fighting over the same stuff –especially when it was nobody's business. She met with Kane and Abby in the dining hall and after the mandatory hugs they sat down and enjoyed a delightful meal.
To Clarke's surprise Abby didn't mention Lexa during the first part of their conversation which triggered her curiosity. "Octavia told me she saw you with Lexa at the clinic," she asks with no intentions to hide her apprehension.
"Yes, we were just chatting," Abby responds with utmost tranquility.
Kane glances from mother to daughter, knowing this is not going to end well.
"What exactly were you two chatting about?"
"What?" Abby questions defensively. "So now I'm not allowed to exchange some words with the girlfriend of my daughter?"
"Of course you are," Clarke retorts. "I was just wondering what you could possibly be discussing with her, I mean you don't even know each other."
"Well actually that's not my fault" Abby counteracts annoyed. "I see that it is easier for you to go to another town and let your girlfriend´s parents know about your relationship, but it's too much of a bother for you to tell your own mother anything about your life."
That's Kane's cue to flee. "OK, ladies." He takes a napkin and wipes his mouth off quickly. "I promised Indra to have a drink with her tonight, so if you excuse me." He stands up willing himself to step out of what was about to come. "See you at the bar later?" He checks in with his wife.
"Yeah I'll be there."
With that confirmation, Kane readily leaves the dining hall.
The tense silence that followed the exchange is interrupted by Clarke's unapologetic regret. "I'm sorry I didn't let you know sooner, but the last time you saw us together you weren't exactly supportive."
"And you weren't exactly very civil about the matter," Abby stubbornly complains.
Clarke throws her head back and grunts in frustration; she just can't win with her mother. But that doesn't deter her from justifying her actions. "I was only protecting me and her and our relationship, OK? I know you have your opinions, I know you are worried and that's fine; I understand I swear I do mom, but this is my life, my future, my happiness." She subconsciously puts a hand on her heart "you have to let me be; you have to stop acting like you know better than me about my own life. It is actually very simple; you either support me or you keep your opinions to yourself." Saying that Clarke rises from her seat to take off but not before adding less passionately "I don't wanna fight with you anymore, so please, please I'm begging you mom just… be happy for me." She places a kiss on her mother's forehead. "I'll see you tomorrow."
Abby watches Clarke walk away; considering her daughter's words; second guessing her plans for the next day.
…
Lexa and Esiry are playing a card game on Esiry's bed when a knock on the open door catches their attention.
"Am I interrupting," Clarke asks with a smirk.
"Wanheda," Esiry jumps up from the bed to an upright position.
"Hey" Lexa darts toward Clarke giving her a hello peck.
Esiry looks away embarrassed at the display of affection, not wanting to disrespect her Commander.
But Clarke doesn't seem to mind, she beams at her girl but then focuses her attention on the other teen. "I heard you got hurt during practice; how are you feeling?"
"Oh, I'm great Commander; it was just a scratch." Esiry shows her bandaged hand to Clarke.
Clarke's attention is suddenly drawn to the teen's hand and the black blood stains on the bandages. She is involuntarily transported to the night she tended Lexa's similar wound after she defeated Roan. She looks to the side, finding Lexa apparently having the same recollection.
They lock eyes on one another, with longing and tenderness in their gazes; the memory fresh on their minds bringing a bittersweet sensation to both their hearts.
That is until Esiry clears her throat uncomfortably, breaking the spell.
"Right uh…" Clarke reacts first. "We should get going, let Esiry rest."
"Sure yeah," Lexa shakes her head to come to her senses.
Esiry barely contains the mock heaving sound she wants to make at how disgustingly in love they look. "see you later," she finally lets out in Lexa's direction. "Commander," she bows her head, watching Clarke and Lexa as they walk away.
…
Already secure behind Lexa's door, Clarke ventures. "I hope my mother didn't give you a hard time earlier at the clinic." She wants to make sure Abby didn't cause any trouble.
"She just caught me off guard. She didn't really have time to do anything since Octavia came to my rescue," she remembers with relief; which brings another topic to the table. "By the way she was very opportune… you're not having me followed again are you?" Suspicion colors her tone of voice.
"Oh no, no of course not!" Clarke hurries to clarify. "I found out she was here thanks to Kane and I evidently assumed she would be at the clinic; so I sent Octavia to check on you cause I couldn't go myself, you know the meeting." She hopes her explanation is satisfactory.
"Hmm" Lexa pretends to meditate on the response, "alright I believe you."
Clarke rolls her eyes at the silliness of her girlfriend.
"I love when you get all protective on me," Lexa confesses with a shy smile.
"And I love taking care of you," Clarke declares sweetly.
But the sweetness doesn't last long.
"I know other ways you can take care of me," Lexa murmurs seductively; making it sound as an invitation and a challenge at the same time.
And Clarke accepts both gladly. She sprints toward Lexa, grabbing the back of her neck forcefully and joining their lips in a hungry kiss.
It's been a while, for both of them, to be so close to each other, devouring their mouths like this. The desire emerges like a fire waiting to be ignited making them lose themselves in their passion.
Lexa pulls Clarke against her body by the hips, humming with delight at the proximity.
Clarke responds in kind, pinning Lexa against the nearest wall.
Their hands roam desperately around contours and hair. It is so good and hot, both enjoying the reactions they get from one another.
Soon Lexa wants more. Her fingers move to the buttons of Clarke's jacket wishing to get rid of the article as quickly as she can. She gets side tracked at the third button though; the view of Clarke's cleavage results in her changing her tactics and instead of removing the jacket she grasps Clarke's breasts with both hands.
That makes Clarke moan loudly with pleasure.
Encouraged by the response, Lexa moves a hand down, pulling at Clarke's shirt in search of skin. When she finds it, she groans at the warmth and softness of it, she can't get enough of it. "Clarke…" she rasps in her lover's mouth. Her most carnal instincts and teenage hormones take over, guiding her hand south, at Clarke's belt buckle.
But something deep within inside of Clarke cracks at the action. "Wait!" She exclaims putting a hand on top of Lexa's.
"woah wha…"
"I'm sorry Lexa I can't I…" Clarke takes a step back, panicking.
"Clarke …" Lexa attempts to reach for Clarke but two hands stop her.
"Don't please!" Clarke verbalizes confused and anxious. "I don't want… I… I gotta go" without more explanation and not even bothering to look back at Lexa, Clarke runs away from the scene.
Lexa remains stunned in place having a very clear idea of what happened to her woman. "Fuck, what have I done!"