It felt like weeks had passed for Penelope. So much happened she still hadn't wrapped her head around it. Did he really said he loved her? – she thought. Or did she image it? Was all of that really happening?

After his confession she couldn't find the words to tell him. How would it event look like? I'm Lady Whistledown was definitely not the answer to the I Love You. She just hoped she still would be first to tell him tomorrow. After she would have a solution for all of that. Midday. Her rules. Event if it meant the end.

She still had to change a few things and the time was running out. Running into her room, she grabbed a pen and made the last changes. Grabbed her gown and went outside, where the carriage was already waiting for her.

At the same time Colin ordered his carriage driver to follow her carriage. "But not too close, they shouldn't know we're following them." He was trying to catch his breath, million different thoughts filling his head. The time she left his living room. Her leaving today. Was it all connected?

He noticed they were headed in the direction of the city. What she could've forgot in the city in the deep of the night? He went from confused to mad. From mad to insecure. And back to confused again. Soon enough he will find out, whatever it was. Still, it felt longer than it was. And suddenly they stopped.

"Lord, that carriage stopped on the other side of the building, do you want to keep on riding?" the carriage driver announced quietly.

"No. Wait for me here." Colin opened his own door, went outside and carefully looked around. He was definitely in the city. What kind of business could she have here at that time? – he thought again, just as he caught her silhouette. He went after her, but far away in case she turns around. She went a few blocks to the east and stopped in front of some building he wasn't quite familiar with. Was she meeting somebody? – he thought.

And just when his thoughts clouded his head once again, he didn't notice how he accidently dropped his pocket watch, he was holding in his hand all the way after her. Falling down, watch broke to pieces and made a hell of a sound.

She turned.

He looked up.

His eyes crushed into her eyes.

Time was frozen as neither of them expected to be discovered.

There were so many words in the back of his mind, but it felt like he couldn't make a sound.

"Colin." That was the only thing that left her lips. She quickly put her hand with envelope behind her back, hoping he won't notice.

"Indeed, that's a surprise. I thought you're tired and wanted to head home." His face took a serious expression in the matter of seconds. "What are you doing here in the middle of the night completely alone and not even with your own carriage, Penelope?"

"I... I…" There were no words that could anyhow explain her actions right now without compromising her.

"Are you here to meet somebody?" There was hurt visible in his eyes. For the first time she saw his eyes darken but it was completely different. There were both oblivious standing in the middle of the street and simply looking at each other. Strong wind blew at their faces, as he grabbed her arm and pulled her in one of the tunnels between houses. "Are you seeing someone else, Pen?" He asked this time tears were standing in his darkened blue eyes. Maybe that was wind, maybe that was her - Penelope – the strongest tornado that had blew him away.

"Seeing…? What? Colin, no, you completely misreading the situation." She said, reaching out for his hand, only to feel him take a rapid step back. "Colin, please…" Now pain reflected in her own eyes.

"What am I supposed to think, Pen? You want to leave the ball because as you say you feel tired and now, I find you here. Alone. In the middle of the night. Your hand is covered in ink, like you've been writing letters to somebody else." Now he was mad, his voice going up a few tones. "So, tell me what is going on?" He took a deep breath "Do you even know what could happen to you?" He was screaming by now, his hand flying in the air only to land on his face, as he run one of the hands over his forehead.

"Colin, please can we talk about it tomorrow?" She asked talking a step towards him, as he took another step back.

"Do you even know how dangerous it is, to be in the city at this time alone?" It appeared he had calmed down a bit, his voice filled with worry now.

That phrase shifted something inside her and now she was getting mad. "I can take care of myself." She spoke.

She could take care of herself. That was all he would get? He was back to pissed in a matter of seconds. "Then what am I good to you?"

"Colin… Please don't…"

"Please don't what? Don't what, Pen? Don't be worried? Don't be wondering what are you hiding from your future husband? Or should I say don't marry you?" He was so lost and so hurt by this situation, he didn't really think before saying. But as soon as those words made her jaw open and tears fall from her eyes, he knew it was not at all what he meant to say. He never meant to hurt her, neither to say those words at all. "I'm sorry, that's not what I mean." He looked her up and down and noticed one of her hands was behind her back, just as hiding something.

"If you don't want to marry me, Colin…" Just as she started to speak though her tears, he interrupted her midsentence.

"What's that?" He made a motion towards her hand.

"What?" She was lost. Where was he looking? She would not clearly see him in this dimmed light in the tunnel.

"Behind your back. What are you hiding?" His eyes shifted to her eyes as he reached out to her hand that was holding the envelope, which just made her take a swift step closer to him and hug him tight, arm holding the envelope going behind his back.

He was taken aback by that movement. It was visible she needed closeness only they shared. It still felt a bit different from all their hugs they ever shared. He didn't hesitate to hug her back. Her vulnerability synced with his support. Moment felt like the warmest embrace in the coldest night for both of them. She sobbed and he only hugged her tighter, letting out deep breath he didn't know he was holding. As soon as calmness has come, he reached out and snacked the envelope from the hand behind his back. Taking a step back, he quickly opened it as it was unsealed. Silent "oh" left her lips, as his eyes ran though lines.

Dear Gentle Reader –

It is with a surprisingly sentimental heart that I write these words. After all those years of chronicling the lives and times of the beau monde, This Author is putting down her pen.

Although this time was not so long, we all had our spotlight in this column. I surely have written about my true self as many times as gossip were need to be mentioned. I heard many rumors as to who I might be. But truth is This Author needs a change. And as much as we all love this morning read, sometimes we need to let some things go for the seek of our future.

In truth, recent renewal of interest in This Author's identity has grown disturbing. Friends are turning against friends, brothers against sisters, all in the futile attempt to solve an unsolvable secret.

Listening at the doors, chasing down delivery boys – and these are only the tidbits what have reached This Author's ears! What has London Society come to? This Author assured you, Dear Gentle Reader, that she never once listened at a door in all the years of her career. All gossip in this column was come by fairly, with no tools, or tricks other than keen eyes and ears.

I bid you au revoir, London! It has been a pleasure to serve you.

Lady Whistledown.