Chapter Nine:

Escape From The Police

Present Day

Mushroom City, Mushroom Kingdom

Friday, June 20XX

The sound of fast-spinning wheels and wildly-revving engines shook the streets, accompanied by the wailing of police sirens. A certain little fungus was crossing the road when he heard the commotion, and he turned to see a black car barreling towards him. Toad screamed and dove out of the way, seconds before the vehicle drove by.

"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, YOU HOBO!" Toad yelled angrily, and yelped when a squad of cop cars rolled by moments later.

And the "hobo" in question was Bob Bobowski, resident ex-rapper and womanizing hobo of the Mushroom Kingdom, Garo-turned... whatever the heck he was. Bob's foot was slapped down hard upon the pedal while his, er, hands grasped the steering wheel. The cloaked ex-Garo looked in the rearview mirror, and then, he reverted his attention back to the road.

Just recently, he'd scammed the local Pianta Mafia, and, to really rub the salt in, Bob had stolen the leader's car while kidnapping one of the gang's members. If there was one thing he didn't expect, it was for those crooks to discretely call the cops on him.

Fortunately for Bob, the one cop he didn't have to worry about was Hal Monitor, who was said to be off-duty today.

"PULL OVER AND STEP OUT OF THE VEHICLE!" Bob heard a cop shout, "YOU ARE CHARGED WITH KIDNAPPING AND STEALING! YOU CANNOT RUN, WE ARE THE POLICE, AND WE HAVE THE MEANS TO CAPTURE YOU!"

He heard a gunshot, and Bob's eyes flashed red. He picked up his Tommy, opened the window, and began firing at the cops. He ducked back inside to steer his car on the closest northwest avenue, which led out of the city, right as the cops opened fire again. This time, he heard a bullet ricochet off the back of the car, just above one of the wheels.

"NoT wHeN I jUsT bOuGhT tHiS cAr, YoU aSsHoLeS!" Bob snarled with fury, he didn't take kindly to getting a scratch on his brand new/actually mafia-owned car.

The rapping hobo was speeding through the lush countryside by this point, and cops were gaining on him. The angry Bob made a hard left, driving past a large mushroom, and drove towards another big mushroom while preparing a rocket launcher. He took another left, then another, and saw the cop cars that were pursuing him.

Bob tapped the trigger, and the rocket fired towards the incoming police squad before an explosion sent dust into the air, decimating several cars and sending cops scattering everywhere. Bob slammed on the gas again, and raced through the field, narrowly missing another cop car as it drove onto the scene.

He heard the sound of sirens again, and sweat rolled down his forehead; The police had just sent in reinforcements, and they were not going to stop hunting Bob until they got him.

Desperation set in. Bob smacked the gas pedal harder, tearing across the field until the only sign of the cops at the moment were their sirens, but he knew they were coming after him, and Bob had to find a place to hide. And yet, he was not about to give up this car by a long shot.

The big Bobowski needed help, he needed someone, a sucker who could help him big time.

Idiots were useful, and Bob knew good old Swagmaster69696969. Maybe he could help, assuming he wasn't too busy doing guard and military stuff with Chris Gordman. Bob drove as fast as he could, until he spotted a certain pudgy guy with a mustache up ahead.

Mario, the universe's Avatar and chief idiot of the Mushroom Kingdom, one of Bob's good friends since the day they met in the sewer... even though it took years for them to warm up to each other.

He streaked towards the fat Italian and slammed the break, just seconds before he rammed Mario. Luckily, Mario managed to get out of the way. Bob scrambled out of his car with the door open, and approached the surprised spaghetti-loving pudgy Italian plumber with hope that he would listen.

"MaRiO! YoU gOt To HeLp Me DiTcH tHiS cAr, MaN!" Bob pleaded, "No TiMe To ExPlAiN, bRo! JuSt TaKe ThE dAmN cAr!"

Mario flashed his trademark derpy eyes, then he winked and replied, "No problem!"

And with a hearty "wahoo", the fat Italian jumped into the driver's seat, took the wheel and slammed the reverse pedal for a moment, then he drove off through the countryside. Bob made a break for it on foot, and ran like a race horse. He didn't look back, but he knew the police were going after the car instead.

The Garo-turned whatever-the-heck-he-was spotted Kirby coming down on a Warp Star, and Bob was hit with a "genius" idea. He kicked the pink puffball across the ground, hopped onto the glowing star, and wished to be transported somewhere safe from the police.

Reading his mind, the Warp Star flew into the sky, and Bob smiled gleefully. "HeCk, YeAh, BaBy! ThIs Is WhAt I CaLl A gEtAwAy." The elated hobo declared with pride, "ThOsE cOpS cAn EaT hOrSe FuR, I aM tHe BaDaSs NuMbEr OnE KaRmA HoUdInI of ThE mUsHrOoM KiNgDoM! Yo, ThAt BuIlDiNg OvEr ThErE LoOkS lIkE OmNiA AcCaDeMy!"

While Bob was "elsewhere", Mario was putting the pedal to the medal as he drove like a madman to get away from the pursuing police.

The fat Italian noted the lack of Hal Monitor, and he was fine with the fact that he wasn't present, Mario didn't need to deal with him today. It was time to make those cops suck ravioli, and Mario saw a big Warp Pipe in the side of a mountain.

He thought fast, and the pudgy Avatar hit the gas. Mario sped towards it like lightning escaping from a bottle, and he plunged into the spiraling space-time void. A warping sound indicated the Pipe he'd entered had sank into the mountainside, and the dim-witted Italian was tempted to take his hand off the wheel...

...right before the car rocketed out of another Warp Pipe, right onto the streets of a very familiar city, just next to a large apartment/store with the words "Game Go" visible to see on the nearby sign. Mario cut the engines, and processed where he was now.

In fact, it didn't take a genius to explain to Mario where he was, he knew this place; Onett City, Tari's hometown in Eagleland. And, not only was it her home town, but the place was famous for appearing in the Earthbound games.

Man, it had been a while since Mario visited Onett, and speaking of Tari...

The blue-haired cyborg gamer stepped out of the building, and waved excitedly when she saw the fat Italian. Mario smiled as he stepped out to accept his friend's greeting, throwing his arms around Tari in a bear hug that lasted a short couple of seconds before the mentally-challenged plumber pulled away to avoid accidentally hurting the gamer girl's spine...

...and that was when he saw that she looked a little different, especially with those polished clothes, along with the two curly hair strands upon the top of her head.

"Hey-a, Tari. Where did you get-a the new look?" Mario asked.

"Oh, you're talking about my new hairstyle." Tari chuckled, "Long story, but it's great to see you, Mario. Meggy just called, she needs us at her place, right away. And by the way, where did you get the new car?"

"Meggy called?" Mario questioned.

He smiled, and pulled Tari into the car before taking the driver's seat again. Mario started up the engines, and slammed his foot on the pedal before gripping the wheel. Tari yelped as the fat Italian sped through the streets, surprised by Mario's driving style.

But after he heard what Tari had to say, Mario was determined to see his best friend, especially if Meggy needed their help...