Warning- This story contains Childhood sexual abuse. It's not detailed or anything but its there.

Takes place after pp1 and before pp2. jesse and beca never happened as she had no interest in him.

also I'll try to get the motivation to continue my other pp stories if anyone was wondering. had gotten covid and losty writing rhythm and never got back into fully yet. wanted to get this out before it gets deleted in document manager.

not beta read and dont own pitch perfect

The girls were enjoying their weekend and hanging out talking and drinking. Beca zoned herself out until she heard Fat Amy question everyone.

"Listen up bitches! Lets step it up a notch and tell each other stories." She strolled over smugly.

"What kind of stories?" Cynthia Rose asked eyebrows raised. Knowing the blonde it was gonna be something outrageous.

"Well, long story short. The first time you went down on a guy. Well except CR." Amy Smirked while Stacie whistles." I'll start first. I was 14 and one of my many boyfriends at the time and i decided to sneak into the zoo at night. Maybe thought we could wrestle dingos or crocodile." Amy took a big swig of her alcohol before continuing. "But then we ended up wrestling each other. I decided to show Dusty what I was made of and of course sucked his-"

"Dusty? Like how many boys have you been with that didn't go by their actual names?" Jessica or maybe it was Ashley interrupted.

"Too many to count. Anyways he barely lasted two minutes under moi and I broke things off with him." Amy responded. "Or maybe I was just that good. Next?"

"I'll go!" Stacie of course volunteered saying she was 13 when she had her first experience sucking off a guy. One by one someone told their story except Cynthia-Rose who ended up sharing her first experience with a girl.

Even Chole said her first time wasn't with Tom but a completely different guy which for some reason struck a cord in Beca's heart. But she also wanted to run far away from this topic. She didn't want to think anything remotely in that direction. Because when she did, she usually spiraled down the rabbit hole of dark thoughts.

"Beca?" Amy called out making her jump.

"Hmm?" She hardly responded.

"Your the last one shortstack. Even Lily saud something..." Not like anyone understood it though. "Come on give us the deets." Fat Amy beckoned. "I bet its a good one."

"Uhh..." Imagines flashed into her mind. Shes choking and crying. She begged for him to stop because she didn't like it and he just dismissed her every time, saying she had to be a good girl. Good girls do what they are told. Maybe that's one reason why she butted heads so much with Aubrey her first year at Barden. She didn't like being told what to do ever since...

"Earth to Beca? You okay there?" Chloe asked her brow furrowing in concern. She couldn't read what exactly the face Beca was making.

"Maybe she hasn't been with a guy or anyone? Thats why she's so quiet about it?" CR guessed. "Or maybe she bats for the other time like I do?" She said that last bit quieter almost no one heard it.

"That can't be have you seen her? If I wasn't straight I'd totally bang her." Stacie gave her a wink. "Maybe you and Jesse at one point-"

"NO!" Beca snapped causing the group to pause and look at her. "Uh...Sorry but I forgot my dad wanted me to call him, so I'll just be on my way..." She akwardly muttered to the bellas before getting up and leaving them in haste.

"Wait Beca!" Chole called out in concern but the brunette kept waking away towards her and Amy's room. She turned her head to the girls and saying. "Sorry. I'm going to go check on her. Make sure she's okay." Everyone could only nod. They didn't know what exactly was wrong with the brunette. But if someone could break through Beca's walls, it would be Chloe.

Chloe was very worried. Beca activity avoided her father like the plague as they have quite the strained relationship. And she just used him as an excuse to leave saying she was voluntary calling him... Seemed very suspicious. Something had upset Beca obviously but she could only guess on what it was. Maybe CR was on to something and maybe wasn't ready to come out to her friends? The Bellas would welcome her with open arms with whatever she identified as.

Chloe walked to her best friends room and heard muffiled sobs. The redheads heart felt like it shattered in a million pieces. Knocking on the door Chloe said "Beca Sweetie? I'm coming in okay?" She went for the knob and felt relieved it wasn't locked.

Beca was curled on her bed, her hands covering her face. "P-Please go..." She croked out. She definitely lied about her father.

She ignores her words as there was no way she was going to leave with Beca crying like this.

"Becs... please talk to me... something we said down there upset you and I can't leave things as they are." Chloe bit her lip as she closed the door and sat down next to her. She grabbed the crying girls hand to comfort her but Beca just flinched instead. "Sorry." She apologized and felt bad retracting her hand. Chloe was reminded of the first year at Barden together. Beca kept to her self and flinched a lot whenever she was touched. She just thought it was a Beca thing. Over the months though she slowly stopped doing it with Chloe as she let the redhead in. This honestly felt like they just took two steps back here. That just shows her how serious whatever this was.

Beca makes a hollow laugh before a tear slides down her face and she wipes it off. She knew the redhead was to stubborn to give up so she caved in. "Fuck...I don't... I never told... You'll see me different Chlo." Beca says frustrated like she didn't know where to start. She bit her lip painfully.

"It's okay Becs whatever you have to say i won't judge. Take your time. I can sit with you all night if I have too." Chloe does her best and smiles, reassuring her.

"It's.." Beca looks away from her staring at the wall and inhaling sharply. "To answer Fat Amy's question... nine." She quietly said ripping it off like a bandaid. At this point she's trembling with more tears escaping. Her makeup started running down her face.

"What?" Chloe said momentarily confused, her brain taking a bit to catch up. When she recalls Amy's question, she pales. B-Beca... you...nine years old?" She struggles to say anything as this was a huge bombshell. No way any nine year old had the thought process to what that entails let alone can consent to such an act. Her behavior before she left and from all over the year made sense now. She suddenly felt really guilty for barging into her shower completely naked now. No wonder Beca looked really panicked when she thought Chloe asked her to sing it for her. She suddenly had an urge to vomit but held it in for the brunette." Beca..." She swallows hard. "I'm so sorry you had to go through with that. You don't have to give me the details but I'm here to listen if you do."

Chloe started crying softly as well. Shes cares for Beca a lot. In fact, she's in love with her. So whenever the DJ was in pain, it hurt Chloe as well. She wanted to badly to take the shaking girl on her arms but held back waiting for Beca to give the okay. In the meantime she concentrated on breathing normally.

"Chlo.. not... it's all in the past." She tried to play it off nonchalantly like she didn't continue to have nightmares all because of him years later. How she wasn't afraid of needles at the doctor's but had to be held down whenever they used the tounge depressor because it gave her flashbacks to her childhood.

Suddenly a scary thought came to Chloe's mind and paled. What if the strained relationship between Beca and her father was because of all this? "Beca please tell me your father wasn't the one who..." She was scared of finding the answer.

Beca whips her head so fast looking back at Chloe in shock. "God no! I-I mean he's definitely an asshole but he'd never do that to me." The brunette cleard things up. She was looking in Chloe's general direction a bit red faced like she was embarrassed. She still had trouble looking Chloe straight in the eye.

Chloe felt a small amount of relief but not much. Her stomach still felt queasy again. Someone out there still did this to her Beca before she was even a tween. "Beca, this person can no longer hurt you right? Are you safe from them?" If this person even tried to touch Beca or even entertained the idea to be in the same room as her, she'd go full avenger on them like she was Black Widow. No one would find the body.

"No. He um... he got drunk one night and did something stupid... and died a few years ago." Beca revealed. "Since I didn't tell anyone about it I had to go to his funeral. It was quite hard on me... People thought I was a sobbing mess because he died and not because of what he did to me..." Beca's face squinched up talking about her molester. This time she couldn't hold back her tears and fell into Chloe's awaiting arms. Sobs shook the redhead's shoulder, her shirt getting damp as Beca cried harder.

Chloe rubbed her back soothenly. "Its okay Becs... let it all out." Chloe never thought she'd be happy for someone's death as she was now. Karma. She thought. "It must have been tough going to his funeral..." She couldn't imagine going to someone's funeral who... traumatized you like that. Because of him Beca will have to deal with the aftermath for the rest of her life. Even worse, she wouldnt get complete closure since he was dead. Even so she'll help her as much as she can. She'd move Mount Everest for Beca if she physically could.

Beca pulled back in her embrace. Her shaking and sobs died down a little."Y-yeah. But Mom forced me since she didn't know... Thought I was just acting out and made me go because he was my cousin. Um... Well since dad left when i was a kid mom had to work all the time supporting us. And during the summer she couldn't afford daycare so she left me over my aunt and uncles house. And well you can guess what happened from there." Beca confesses burying her face into Chloe's shoulder again.

Said redhead couldn't help but gasp out loud. "You're cousin!?" She was flabbergasted. Someone not only destroyed her childhood by doing unfathomable things to her but it was someone she trusted and probably looked up too as well."Becs... Please tell me did he ever rape you?" Chloe gave her a sad look hoping for a small miracle.

"I... just his fingers... I don't think he wanted evidence of what was happening so he never stuck it in..." She trailed off completely ashamed. "He also liked using his t-tongue alot. I tried telling him I didn't like it but he never listened to me." Chloe felt crestfallen. While he didn't traumatized her that way unfortunately, the bastered still penetrated her, ignoring her pleas to stop. She absolutely hated Beca's cousin.

Chloe lifted Beca's chin tenderly so she was looking at her. "Oh baby, I'm so sorry. You've been through a lot but let me tell you that doesn't make me love you any less." Chloe soothed her.

Beca shuddered and blinked as some fresh tears fell down her face. "I... you love me?"

"I do." Chloe didn't hesitate to tell her at all. She may be unsure of her future, but the one thing she was completely sure of was Beca.

"As a... friend or?" She stoped talking looking at her afraid of what Chloe might say next. She didn't want to ruin whatever friendship they had going on.

"I'm in love with you Beca. Even if you'll never love me the same way." She smiled towards her. Beca's eyes widened and she lent forward kissing Chloe on the cheek surprising the redhead. "Bec?"

"I- Love you too. A lot actually. And thank you for staying here with me. Even when i told you to get out. It means a lot to me." While still not fully okay from their earlier speak she welcomed the change of topic. She was starting to feel giddy.

"No problem Beca. I'd do it again a million times over." Beca looks her in the eyes with little problem this time and sees Chloe is truly genuine.

"What...are we?" Beca says a minute later to break the silence. Plus she couldn't get it out of her head after they both confessed to each other just minutes before. Jesse shared and interest in her but she was never interested back. In fact she hadn't been interested in anyone before Chloe came along.

Chloe smiles at her while her hand reaches for Becs again but stopped before saying."Is this okay?" Chloe askes which Beca nods. Chloe hand then rests on top of Beca's, their fingers lacing together."Whatever you want us to be. We don't have to have label ourselves if you don't want. We can be just Beca and Chloe and go from there."

The brunette didn't dwell over it too long before answering. "Girlfriends definitely. But um ..." She seemed to hesitate looking away again.

"What is it baby?" Chloe nods happily but notices her hesitation and squeezes her hand. "You can tell me anything. Anytime, anywhere."

"Chlo? Sorry. It's probably going to be awhile before we... you know." Beca cringes. Chloe would have needs and she didn't know when she'd be able to do that stuff with her."Since I'm a bit messed up and stuff." Beca stiffins a bit remembering their earlier conversation.

"Oh Becs... you never have to apologize for that. I'll never force you to do anything you aren't ready for. You set the pace. Even if we never get to that point I'll be happy because I'll be with you." Sure sex is great but its not needed if you truly care for the person your with. She'd happily do that for Beca. She's totes worth it. "And your not messed up Beca. Sure you had a hard childhood, but that just means you're so strong to survive such an ordeal." Beca looked sceptical but Chloe would remind her everyday till she believed it.

"Okay... Chlo?" Beca leans on Chloes shoulder. Their hands still linked together.

"Yes?" Chloe kisses her forehead lovingly.

"Can I sleep with you tonight? Um... just sleeping." Beca face heats up. She feels like she would have nightmares tonight and didn't want to be alone. "And I don't want to face Amy or the others right now. I don't hold it against Amy for what she said. She doesn't know about it...Can you keep this between us please?"

"Of course baby. And dont worry I won't say anything to anyone unless you give me the okay." She said honestly.

"Thanks Babe." Beca smiles wiping the last bit of tears from her eyes. She then got up and went to her dresser to grab her PJs. Chloe leaves for her room giving Beca privacy to change.

Chloe changes into her own pj's while waiting for Beca to arrive. A knock hits her door and she lets her newly appointed girlfriend into the room. She breaks into a grin. Girlfriend. She loved the thought of calling Beca her girlfriend. They both settle in Chloes bed with Beca being the little spoon. "Goodnight Beca. I love you."

"Goodnight. Love you too Chloe." Beca mumbled falling asleep with a smile on her face.

Notes-

This was actually based off my own childhood and wanted to release some of that childhood trauma in writing. I was 9 and my cousin was about 15. Never told anyone about what he did to me until after he had died. He drank to much on a party bus and fell out the emergency door. tall about karma.