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As always, all mistakes are mine. Twilight, however, is Meyer's.

Ch. 2 - BPOV

It's funny to think how people around you go about their everyday lives, completely unaware of others whose lives were crumbling around them. How people can laugh and smile around you- and with you, thinking that everything is great. Completely oblivious to the fact that the person with them is on the verge of falling apart.

Still, I do my best to keep the facade and let them think what they want. Thankfully, I have become a better actress these past few months.

I often find myself absentmindedly listening to people around me, wearing a smile on my face and letting out laughs when they expect me to. I try to ignore the looks of sympathy they throw me when they talk about their own families. Instead, I shake my head and tell them how happy I am for them, that I've come at peace with my situation.

It's true. For the most part.

Despite desperately wanting what they have, I am truly happy for them. However, coming at peace with my situation is something I don't think I'll ever be able to do.

I don't think anyone will ever be able to be at peace with this situation if it were to happen to them.

It's the last weekend before Christmas and my colleagues invited me for brunch in the city. I was tempted to say no, but thought it was better than staying home alone and letting myself drown with thoughts about my pathetic life.

"Speaking of work, I heard Marcus is thinking of stepping down," Valerie says as she sips her water, effectively bringing me out of my thoughts.

Olivia gasps, "I heard that, too!" she exclaims before lowering her voice, "They say he's moving to San Francisco"

"San Francisco?" Rose asks, brows high.

Olivia nods before looking around the restaurant and leaning in to whisper conspiratorially, "They say his wife finally caught up with his affair with you-know-who"

"Just now?" Jane snorts, "His wife must've been blind as fuck if she's eating up all the excuses he feeds her about his late nights at work for months"

"Stupid, you mean" Valerie snickers, "I mean, we must admit that that woman is not really the brightest bulb in the room. Remember when-"

"Can we focus on important matters?" Rose interrupts, impatiently. One thing Rose and I have in common is that we're not one to gossip or backstab other people, much less people who we don't know personally. "Who told you that Marcus is stepping down?"

Valerie shrugs, "Mike from HR"

Rose narrows her eyes doubtingly, "Marcus told Mike that he's stepping down?"

Valerie rolls her eyes, "Of course Marcus didn't tell Mike that personally" she says, "Mike heard it from Tia who heard it from Heidi. Apparently, Zafrina was in a meeting with Marcus last Friday and he was asking to be transferred to our San Francisco office by next month."

Tia is Mike's colleague in their department. She is apparently best friends with Heidi, who is conveniently Zafrina's secretary.

"So basically, this is all a he-said-she-said information," Rose says, mouth forming a straight line.

Valerie shrugs, "Basically" she admits before smirking, "but come on, who else would know this stuff better than the secretary of the director of the HR Department itself? You know as well as I do that the source is solid as fuck"

Rose shakes her head before looking at me, "You've been quiet the entire time" she accuses, "What do you think?"

"About what?" I ask, sitting up.

"Marcus stepping down" she says, exasperatedly

"It could be true"

"That's it?" Rose says after a few seconds of silence, as if disappointed that I didn't add anything more to it.

I shrug, "I don't really dwell much into Marcus' business to form my own opinion about it" I admit, "But it could be true that he is stepping down. He's been giving us more freedom about how we do stuff lately"

Rose nods her head slowly before smiling, "Then, I guess we're looking into the new general manager in the coming weeks"

I frown as I take note of the excitement in her eyes. I drag my eyes to each person around the table only to see that they're wearing similar expressions on their faces, "Who?"

Rose rolls her eyes, "Who else are they going to promote aside from you, Bella?"

I balk, "Me?"

"Oh it's definitely you, B" Jane nods, "Out of all of us, you're the first to get promoted as a manager"

"But I was only ahead of Rose for a few months" I argue, "and I only got promoted a year ago. I doubt they'll even consider me"

"You got promoted five months before I did," Rose stresses, "and if we're being technical about it, it's almost two years since your promotion as opposed to all of us here who've been promoted for a little over a year or even less than a year in Olivia's case"

"I got promoted just this year" Olivia nods

"Also, didn't Marcus start assigning new tasks to you two weeks ago?" Rose smirks, "You know that man wouldn't hand off tasks easily even if he's shit at doing them"

"But I don't think I'm even ready for that" I say, head spinning.

"Please, you've been ready to take over since you stepped in as the marketing manager" Valerie rolls her eyes, not bothering to hide her disdain over our current general manager.

"But-"

"But nothing" Rose says firmly, "Besides nothing is official, yet. We don't even know if this is all true"

"But if it is, no one here is more deserving than you" Valerie smiles

I huff out a laugh and shake my head. I listen to them as they move on with the topic and talk about the latest issues they're experiencing in their own teams. Marcus and the "promotion" were not brought up again for the remaining time.

I sigh as I step out of the restaurant an hour or two later, shivering against the cool breeze of Chicago. I tuck the scarf around my coat tightly and squint up at the gloomy sky.

"All right, we'll see you guys on Monday" Valerie waves as she and Jane start walking down the opposite block where their apartments are located.

Since Rose's apartment is about a block away from Olivia's, the two of them decide to uber together. We wait for their ride and talk about mundane stuff until a Chevrolet finally stops in front of us.

Olivia double checks with the driver before nodding her head at Rose and opening the door. She sends me a smile and a wave before getting in.

Rose pulls me in for a hug, "Call me tonight, B"

"Stay safe" I say and watch her slide next to Olivia inside the cab. I raise my hand when I see them waving behind the tinted window.

I watch them until the car turns right and let out a deep sigh- mentally and emotionally spent. I start my way to the opposite block from where Valerie and Jane walked off to earlier.

Just as I'm about to reach the end of the block, I hear a very familiar voice call me from behind.

"Bella?"

I close my eyes in dread and force a smile on my face before turning.

"Alice, hey"

"It is you!" Alice beams as she surprisingly pulls me in for a hug, "What are you doing here?"

She must've felt my surprise when I returned her hug a minute later because I felt her body stiffening slightly before releasing me.

I clear my throat to shake off the awkwardness of the situation, "Lunch with my colleagues," I say before eying the bags in her hands, "What about you? Christmas shopping?"

Alice looks down, "Yeah. Grocery shopping, actually," she chuckles, "Need to grab the goods before they all sell out"

I nod my head in understanding before silence falls upon us. We stare at each other for a while, not knowing how to fill the tense silence. My heart clenches as I remember the times where we could talk to each other for countless hours.

"How are you" Alice says carefully

I cough out a laugh, "I've been better" I admit, "how are you?" How is he?

"I'm good" Alice says before adding hesitantly as if hearing my thoughts, "He's doing good, too. I guess"

I guess?

My confusion must have been evident because she lets out a huff and shakes her head, as if regretting saying anything at all, "Well, better now" she corrects herself, "Better than the first few months"

I nod my head, heart breaking at the thought that the reason he wasn't okay was because of me. "That's… good" I say, forcing a smile despite my tightening chest. Leave before you completely lose it. "I should-"

"Where are you spending Christmas?" She asks, cutting me off.

"Oh.." I exclaim, caught off guard at her question, "Uh.. at home, I guess"

Her brows furrow, "Home? As in, Washington?" She clarifies, head tilting

"Lincoln." I shake my head, "Charlie is taking Renee on a trip to Europe this Christmas"

"Renee must've been ecstatic" she says with a genuine smile, "she's been dying to go there since forever"

I smile genuinely for the first time as I remember the wistful look on Renee's face when she mentioned the trip, "She is"

Alice laughs, "I bet" she says then looking pensively at me. The look on her face makes me dread whatever she's going to say next, "You should come over for Christmas"

I knew it was coming but it still surprises me, "Oh?"

"No one should spend their holidays alone, B" Alice counters, "especially on Christmas" My hesitation must've been written all over my face because she adds, "You know you're always welcome to join regardless of the situation"

I stay quiet, not knowing how to respond to her statement.

"Esme and Carlisle went up here for the holidays and I know they would love for you to join us" she continues, "you know they've always considered you as their own since forever."

My heart clenches at the mention of my ex in-laws. I've always considered them as my second parents, even way before I officially -on paper, that is- became their daughter. However, seeing them- seeing him, and spending time with him and his family on Christmas day when we have this huge elephant over our heads is something I know I wouldn't be able to handle well- mentally, emotionally, and physically. Heck, I'm not even sure if I'll ever be able to handle it well in the future.

Future.

The thought of having a future without them in my life brings tears to my eyes, which I'm sure she notices.

Alice's eyes softened, "We miss you, B" she says softly after a moment of silence, as if any louder than it would eventually make it crack, "Jazz, Esme, Carlisle, Me- Everyone misses you.." she emphasizes, enough to make me know the meaning behind the words, "I know the situation isn't ideal and only God knows what will happen this Christmas if you come" she chuckles as she shakes her head, "but no one would ever hold that against you, B. No one is holding anything against you. At least know that I don't."

I swallow tightly, "Al.."

"Think about it" She interrupts quickly, reaching out to hold my upper arm.

I hesitate before giving her a nod, "Okay" I whisper, "I'll think about it" I say it even though I know there's no chance I would take her up on her offer. I would never put him and his family in that situation, especially on Christmas. They deserve better. He deserves better than being forced to spend the holiday with his soon-to-be ex-wife.

My response was enough to placate Alice, though. She beams at me as tears glisten her eyelids before bringing her arms around me once more for a hug, "Thank you" she whispers tightly before chuckling, "you know I love you, bitch"

I chuckle as I hear the words we've always exchanged to each other for as far as I can remember. I squeeze her back, "I know" I croak, sniffling, "I love you too"

Her arms around me tightens before loosening. She squeezes my hands with a smile as she pulls back, "Everything will work out" she says, firm enough that I have no choice but to believe her words.

I hope so.

Thoughts?