X-Squad: Ultra Violets

by garshishoe

Viewer discretion was sucked into the Ashen One, so if you're still here, prepare to have your brain scrambled like a plate of eggs at a diner during rush hour! Side effects of this saga may include wondering why the X-Squad's crossing over with Dark Souls, Touhou, Hellsing, Little Witch Academia, The Ultra Violets, and Diablo or the urge to see if Yokai are real on the local news.

1. Misfits are calling

AN: *walks out of a graveyard* Merry *checks calendar* Earth Day, since it's the 5th Saga, I thought, why not do a Diablo fic! So, here we go!

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It seems like these days, villain teams are all the rage. Scoundrels from across the omniverse have been banding together to pursue conquests that no individual villain could achieve alone. You've likely already heard of Maleficent's Overtakers and their exploits or perhaps Mozenrath's Sorcerer's Society (or WHAM ARMY depending on which multiverse you find yourself in) or maybe Ansem's apocalyptic Destroyers, Johnathan Crane's Federation of Fear, Yuki Terumi's maniacal Ruiners, the Beast's Kingdom of Skulls, Arawn's Tyrannical Alliance, or Lex Luthor's Legion of Doom. However, there is one villainous alliance that preferred to keep a lower profile than the rest. Scuttling in shadows, Xigbar, or Braig as he is now known, pulled together a "glittering assemblage" of his own.

Xemnas once dubbed him "the Freeshooter," and there was some melodic justice to that. So Braig set out to collect other "Freeshooters" of his own from across the boundaries of time and space. Soon, the Freeshooters were soon recruited into Deadlight and merged with the Shadow Hunters, and were gathered inside the Junkheap Caverns, a desolate wasteland dimension with no life to speak of where everyone in the omniverse inadvertently threw their trash too, as they waited patiently for their moment to strike. And as the winter months came upon them, thoughts drifted to another occasion...

Nestled deep within the Junkheap Caverns, slowly prowling around on short, sprawling legs, a large female Deinosuchus crept out of the darkness of a cave of trash and rotten food. Looking around, she could only make out the basic shapes of the structures within two feet of her. The rest of it was just a big blur. Not to mention, seeing was a lot more of a challenge now that she had her left eye tightly shut. The reason for that was because that eye, due to an incident, was completely blind.

When she looked over to the right, a small black and white male Ichthyornis clumsily flew from one stalagmite to another. The reason for his clumsiness was because his right wing was severely fractured, and not by a flying accident. He also couldn't completely fly anymore. For the most part, he had to just glide, as the sound of excitedly skittering feet echoed as an all-white 2/3 fraction sped towards the crocodile.

When the Ichthyornis got to the last stalagmite, he leapt off of it and inelegantly swooped down onto the Deinosuchus' head. Feeling an unexpected thing land on her, the Deinosuchus growled and snapped.

"Relax, Dil," the Ichthyornis casually said, "it's us, Ichy and 2/3."

"Ichy! 2/3!" the Deinosuchus scowled harshly. "You know I can't see so good anymore! Why do you sneak up on me like that?!"

"Eh," the living number casually shrugged, "call it a habit."

"Well, did you find anything?" Dil asked.

"Ugh, not even Malicia found so much as a normal footprint." Ichy groaned, irritated. "You think large, dumb longnecks would leave a few tracks."

"I, KING KNIGHT, shall throw the most exclusive party this kingdom has ever seen!" King Knight declared as he stomped around the junkyard dimension he just broke into, spreading holly wherever he went as Dil and 2/3 backed up to avoid getting stepped on. "All of my royal subjects shall attend!"

Kuja, who co-led the Shadow Hunters alongside Megafin, Aprilily, and Braig, picked up a clump of holly off 2/3 and sighed as he incinerated the leaves with his magic as he reclined on a broken car. "Clearly theater etiquette has gone by the wayside. It is truly shameful that the audience would litter my stage with such debris."

"Lighten up, Kuja," Braig said as he placed his arm around Kuja and pulled him in tight. "It's almost Christmas. Let's have a little fun."

"This isn't exactly a holiday I'm inclined to observe," Kuja huffed, but did not make any efforts to pull free of Braig's hold.

"Aprilily, are you sure about that one?" Megafin asked the second-in-command of Shepherd's demon army, gesturing towards Mechagodzilla, who they rebuilt from scratch due to seeing that the beast in control has potential to their cause.

"Megafin-san, you know better than me that there's no small parts here, just small and big actors!" Aprilily assured him.

"Clearly you have never heard the term upstaging," Kuja replied.

"A little help here!" a tiny voice cried alongside Ichy.

Aprilily, Megafin, Kuja and Braig glanced at the small plant that King Knight had found (directly in front of Kuja's bookshelf) and quickly noticed Airy and Ichy were tied to the top of the plant. Apparently the little fairy and the Ichthyornis were close enough to Christmas angels for King Knight's purposes.

"Oh dear," Kuja sighed. "Let's not reduce our supporting actors to the role of set decoration, shall we?"

Kuja flicked his wrist and magically untied Airy and Ichy from the tree. Airy and Ichy shimmied off the bindings and glared angrily at King Knight (who was still prancing about, decking the halls with bounds of holly). Airy and Ichy flew or glided down and got right up in King Knight's face. The two slipped into his helmet, and the ensuing girlish scream preceded King Knight accidentally falling into Mechagodzilla's mouth, being shredded alive as Mechagodzilla ate the knight. Airy emerged from the robot kaiju's mouth and dusted off her hands, with Ichy having to piggyback on the fairy.

"That'll teach you to mess with us!" Airy sneered. "If anyone needs me, I'm going to go to my room, and I'm not coming out until after the holidays."

"Wait! Airy! Hang on!" Birch said as she ran after her. "I've got a little field trip for the crew to go on, and I was hoping you'd join us."

Airy stopped short and turned around. "Does it involve anything Christmas related?"

Braig grimaced. "Well, kinda, but it's also because we need some more magic firepower and you just so happen to-"

"Go on..." Airy said, genuinely interested.

"Ahem, and what pray tell is this mission?" Kuja asked, crossing his arms and glaring at Birch. "Megafin, Aprilily, Braig and I were to be co-directors of this production, and yet here you are, deciding on new blocking without consulting me."

"Don't be mad; this'll be good for everyone, I swear," Birch assured the wizard.

"I shall withhold judgment until I hear exactly what you're planning," Kuja stated.

"Fine, fine," Birch agreed, "but let's get the traveling party assembled first so I don't have to go over it twice."

"What about them?" Kuja asked, gesturing towards Mechagodzilla currently spitting out King Knight's armor, Dil and Ichy arguing over scraps of edible junk food, a young blonde drawing up schematics alongside Kanon, and a tall, blue-skinned, square-jawed woman with wan blonde hair and a mouth full of sharp teeth, dressed in what might be a princess' gown that had seen better days, conversing with Davy Jones.

Kronos shrugged. "Let them come along. Though we'll need some explanation from them."

"Ah, I see," 2/3 said when he saw that people were staring. "I get this reaction a lot, you know. It's not often that folks see my kind. When I first left the haven of the fraction country, the first sort I came across was whole integers, and they didn't take too kindly to me at all. I had to explain to them that I'm just like any other number, and that I'm not so different from your average 1 or 763. I'm just the humble 2/3." He pronounced his name "Two-Thirds."

Again, no one spoke (or signed). That so-called explanation had spurred far more questions than it had answered, and no one knew what order to ask them in.

"I'll give you some time to get used to the sight of me," 2/3 decided. "Really, though, I'm not that different from you, regardless of how I might look. Feel free to take a look at my wares – all completely legally and ethically sourced, mind you. Though might I ask, before you begin, that the pirate give back the items in his pockets?"

The Shadow Hunters exchanged glances. "What items?" Kronos said nervously.

Somehow, it became apparent that if 2/3 had a face, it would have displayed disappointment that came up just short of anger. "I'm afraid there needs to be a certain level of trust between my clients and myself before I can allow you to shop here. And if your act of theft is indicative of…other qualities, you won't want to miss out on what I have to offer."

"Fine, fine, fine!" Kronos said, dropping jewelry out of his pockets. "You happy? I know people would pay a lot for this stuff, even though it's broken – "

"Broken?" 2/3 was confused, picking up one of the necklaces that seemed to be missing some of its gems. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about. Oh, I might have a guess, though – see, as a fraction, I can only do things by two-thirds. Everything I stock is in keeping with that theme. It's built into my nature. It might not be to everyone's taste, but I delight in catering to the esoteric. As for the prices, you'll find that everything has at least a one-third markdown from its expected retail price, but sometimes, I marked it down another one-third after that and then one-third after that. I also pride myself on being affordable."

"Why is all that fancy stuff you have on you so cheap?" Birch asked. "Is it cursed?"

2/3 chuckled. "Why, no. I wouldn't even know how to curse items if I wanted to. I simply am not in this business for the money. Profit is a secondary motivation. This shop is a passion project for me, and I like to make my wares indicative of that."

"Now HOLD on." Calamity picked up one of the things that Kronos had emptied out of his pockets. "I recognize this. Mostly. This is supposed to be a Gorgus Cufflink, and you can ONLY get it on the Healing Gardens. I KNOW because I've been eyeing one for a while, but I can't wear it until I find a new ensemble or five to match its color scheme, so I haven't bought it." She tapped the design on top of the cuff link, which featured two stars crowded on one side so that they looked rather lopsided. "There's supposed to be three stars here, but one's missing, like it's been pried off."

"I'm not quite sure what you're implying," 2/3 told her.

"And WHAT THE – " Calamity picked up another bauble. "This is a Karzo Necklace, but it's shorter than it should be, like someone cut off a third of the links! The bell's gone from this draw ring, some of the gems were dug out of this sorcerer's ring…" She then held up a badge that was supposed to be in the shape of a stylized heart, but just had a third of it roughly snapped off. "REALLY?"

"As I said, my wares are esoteric," 2/3 said calmly.

"They're STOLEN is what they are," Calamity accused. "You steal from other shops and alter them so they have a third of them gone, don't you?"

"THAT'S why you said you might be more interested in your stuff when you caught me stealing!" Kronos gasped. "And it's why your prices are so low: you're turning a profit no matter what, and it's the stealing part that's important, not the selling!"

"These are quite strong accusations," 2/3 said, still unflapped.

"Oh, don't worry," Birch groaned. "We're all a bunch of bad guys who just spent at least half an hour robbing suspiciously shady things that we intend to use to mess with others. We LOVE stolen stuff."

Megafin held up one of the bags of sugar-free gummy bears and Circe held out the magic pen dagger to prove the kind of wares they were interested in.

"Hmm…" 2/3 thought it over. "Well, I suppose it might be a risk to take you at your word, but to be frank, looking at you as a whole, I'm inclined to believe your word. After all, if you'll pardon me, your aesthetic is neither humble nor wholesome." He nodded his 2 in Birch's direction. "With the exception of theirs."

"I'm the odd one out," Birch said.

"This will make business quite easier if you are as you say," 2/3 went on. "All right. I will admit to it. Theft is my passion, and the resale is just icing on the cake. A significant portion of my wares MAY have been acquired from elsewhere in the Omniverse, as well as some holdovers from the worlds I've visited before here. And, of course, altered to fit my specifications, as I can only do things by two-thirds."

"So you've been through other worlds before this one?" Kronos asked.

"Oh, yes, of course," said 2/3. "My associates and I have spent quite some time questing across the multiverse. We sell our wares, yes, but it's only so we can get by while we chase our true pursuit. Though he should really be here when you're told about it. I'd say he should be the one to tell you about it, but that's rather difficult for him, you see. If you ring the bell, however, he should come running."

Birch skipped over to the bell on the Acme side, giving it some enthusiastic dings. There was immediately the sound of a massive crash from the back storeroom – whoever the bell was meant to summon seemed to have tripped and caused a cascade of disaster. There was a chain of sounds of several more things falling over, glass breaking, a cat meowing, even someone yodeling, before the partner of 2/3 showed up in the storeroom doorway, bedraggled and mussed – quickly straightening up and brushing off his fur to look as professional as could be.

Well, at least as professional as a human-sized anthropomorphic coyote could achieve.

He immediately gave a dramatic bow, gesturing from the would-be shoppers toward his inventory. Struck by the inspiration to make a pitch, he picked a gadget labeled "INSTANT TORCH" off the wall. It gave the impression of a medieval torch, a fluted metal rod, but with no flame and a switch at the base. The coyote flicked the switch proudly, and absolutely nothing happened. So he flicked it a few more times, then turned it to his eye, looking down its barrel to see what was wrong –

"I wouldn't," 2/3 advised with the exhaustion of someone who already knew his warning would not be heeded.

The torch suddenly started working, shooting out a massive jet of flame that enveloped the coyote's head.

"Oy vey." Megafin groaned.

"He's fine," 2/3 said casually.

And in fact, when the flames subsided, the coyote was mostly unharmed – just covered in a layer of ash. Embarrassed, he brushed it all off, regaining his normal brown coat, and gently, as if afraid of the device, set the torch back on its shelf.

"Well, this production keeps getting more and more bizarre," Kuja huffed.

"You two are friends or something?" Braig asked.

"Wile E. and I go back quite a bit," 2/3 explained. To this, the coyote – one Wile E. Coyote to be precise – nodded emphatically. "He's a man of few words – well, no words, really - but that's hardly stopped him from chasing down his ambitions."

"Your ambitions of running a joint store in the middle of our turf, and selling half-broken merchandise and faulty torture devices," Kronos remarked.

"One-third broken, I will remind you," 2/3 said indignantly. "And our venture here is funding for our true goal. One that has taken us across many colorful worlds to meet with many colorful friends."

"I know you want us to ask," Megafin sighed, "so what is it? What is this big true goal that you have in mind!"

"Is it world domination?" Aprilily asked excitedly.

"Spreading chaos?" Kronos asked with the same fervor.

Xone, however, had wondered, the moment she saw Wile E., if he might not communicate using her method. She quickly signed to him, "Why don't you tell us?"

Wile E. was surprised to see that someone in the group signed. It clicked with him that she hadn't spoken once since entering the building. He knew the language, but while he was adept at reading it, giving it back was never his specialty. He did, however, have certain alternatives. Quickly, he ducked behind the checkout counter, picking up a large white picket-style sign and producing a black marker. In thick letters, he wrote a single word on the sign, then picked it up to face Xone directly, though in view of everyone else:

"ROADRUNNER"

"Okay, I'm lost," said Birch.

"The Roadrunner is a very infuriating creature," 2/3 explained. "An old nemesis of Wile E.'s. What started out as a simple hunt for prey has turned into…well, I suppose they call it a 'white whale' in some circles, don't they? He's found and caught other birds, but that one in particular eludes him. At first, when his chase of the Roadrunner combined with some errant stardust took him to my world, I tried to convince him that it wasn't worth the trouble." He gave a deep sigh. "Then the Roadrunner managed to somehow pass me while I was hauling a certain…payload away from the Numerical Bank, and it split the sack open in the process. Inspector 763 was called and I was on the run. It had become very personal, though not as personal as it could ever be for him."

Wile E. now held up a crude drawing of a lanky blue bird – one that looked more like a deformed emu than a roadrunner – and then slammed it down on the counter. From the shelves, he took a fold-away multitool, springing a fork attachment out from it and using it to angrily stab the bird over and over again.

"I threw my 2 into the ring," 2/3 explained, "and thus the chase began. It really was the oddest set of coincidences that took us to the worlds we passed through. Along the way, we met like minds, and we dubbed ourselves, well, 'The Roadrunner Hunters.' For, you see, somehow that blue bird managed to menace every single one of us. At present, we've decided to head to this junkyard, rumored to house a group of...unusual people...in the hopes of finding someone with the resources and information that will tell us where the Roadrunner has gone and how to finally take it down once and for all. After all, it began with the two of us, then the other four joined in, and now that's certainly how it's going to end. Here – let me show you some of the souvenirs of our travels."

He brought out a large photo album (though it seemed to only be two-thirds as thick as what one might see in a normal tome) and opened it up to flick through the pages. "Here, Wile E. and I stand with the sorceress Malicia," 2/3 explained. "A quick wit, with a knack for the literary and mathematical as well as the magical. She practically predicted Wordle, you know."

"Wordle?" Kronos repeated. "Never mind. I don't want to know."

"There's no other person in that picture!" Kronos pointed out. "It's just the two of you! And we can clearly see her over there chatting with Grandpa Davy!"

"Ah, yes, well…moving on," 2/3 said. "Here, you can see when our numbers had expanded greatly. There's us with Malicia, and that's Polly Spark, a genius young girl. Oh, and as for the Deinosuchus and Ichthyornis, they came from a land most bizarre – one might even say it was before time."

"Are those the ones blabbing over who gets more food," Braig said. "But the woman you mentioned last time is in the photo, so good job!"

"Well, we might as well help out if we see the thing," said Kronos. "…Was that drawing accurate?"

"Yes," said 2/3. "Roadrunners on other worlds seem to be quite lackluster compared to those from Looney Tune Land. A pity. And of course, where I come from, there aren't any animals at all – only wild classification problems."

"Oh, but another thing to note is that this particular Roadrunner is wearing the Amulet of Life from planet Millennia. It's hard to miss." Malicia added.

"And you're in the right place! Welcome to the Junkheap Caverns, the realm of trash and broken worlds!" Kronos said. "And fair warning, people can also fall in here."

As he said that, a being clad in red and blues fell in through a portal. His suit was shredded in places, untucked and unkempt, glitches flashing across the screen that was his face at uneven intervals. He leaned heavily to one side and occasionally shook, as if whatever fight he'd been through had robbed him of the majority of his strength. He probably wouldn't be able to stand on his own in his state, were it not for the assistance of Wile grabbing him.

"Fu-u-u-uck YOU-" the man grunted, groaned, his legs buckling as he scratched at himself again, the anger from before replaced by a desperate sort of pleading. "N-n-nooo, wa-a-a-ait, I- I ne-nee-need your he-lp-lp, pl-ea-ea-ea-se."

For a moment, the coyote's smile remained in place, but then horror dawned as he shot to his feet and rushed to Vox's side, quickly drawing on his sign. "Wait, sir, look at me- when was the last time you were with someone?"

"T-tw-twoo-o-o weeks."

Genuine panic infected Wile's expression and sign. "Hey, you had any painkillers since then?"

"I-I-I pre-prefer L-L-Love P-P-Po-Potion. Sh-sh-ip-ment-ment-ment des-stroy-oyed."

"Malicia!" Wile's sign read. "Strongest potion you know how to make, and make it double! Polly, throw me the ACME Pill Popper, the closer, the better!"

"Waot, you know what trouble you have woth them!"

"I'm not gonna let 2/3 handle this, Polly, give me the Popper!" Wile's sign now read. "You don't know what he's goin' through! I do! This ain't just withdrawal, it's that times a million and goin' cold turkey would kill him if he was alive!" Despite the staredown as Wile continued his silent tirade, everyone could see how quickly Polly grabbed a gun resembling a syringe. "We ain't tossin' this guy out when he needs help! I don't give a darn how much my luck bites me in the behind! Ain't no one deserves this! No one!"

"So what about the mana storm?" Birch asked, as black clumps of raw mana materialized out of the air around the center of the dump, as it slowly grew in size and merged together, approximating a humanoid form. As it grew, colour suddenly returned to it, as a magenta-haired demoness, Aurra, appeared fully and fell on Dil.

Aurra snapped her head upwards in shock, tears streaming down her face. In a blind panic, she raised her hands, and made sure her neck was intact. She looked around the dump in total confusion, her eyes darting between the alien landscape of the Junkheap Caverns, and the beings before her.

She collected herself. It was only a few seconds, but briefly, Aurra had no control over her emotions, something she had never experienced in her long life. She decided to keep sniffling for the moment. She was already crying, and depending on what these creatures were, it might make them pity her.

"Hello, Aurra the Guillotine," Megafin spoke. "You're dead. And I'm the one who brought you back from the grave."

"Um, hello, a weird critter's on my back, and I don't think it's lunch!" Dil snapped.

Aura felt a whole new wave of unfamiliar, and unpleasant emotions rising. She had always heard that the Goddess was the enemy of demons, although she thought it was nothing but human foolishness. And now she is in front of a fish god, presumably to await her judgment? Aurra realized she couldn't move due to sheer fear, and began to feel similar to how she had moments before. Nervousness, rising to panic.

"L-Listen to me!" Aurra blurted out, increasing the tears. "You don't understand, the Great Demon King's magic had hold over my mind, since my parents sold me to him! I never wanted to hurt anyone!"

Megafin raised a finger to silence Aurra. "Amusing as this is, it's quickly growing tiresome. I know who you are, I know everything about you, and I am working for what's basically the niece of a true Goddess, not some puffed-up brat with a fancy soul cage spell."

Aurra calmed herself again, and more carefully looked at them. Looking closer, some of them were possibly demons, like her. Each was more powerful than any of her executioners, but still clearly inferior to her. She glanced at the fish demon, and for a moment attempted to read his mana.

"My apologies," Aurra said calmly, respectfully bowing to what she could only imagine was an impossibly powerful demon.

Megafin spoke up, using his Abyss Scanner on her. "Well, let's review what you are. It might take a bit of time, seeing as the scanner's saying you're a great demon who has lived for over five hundred years."

"And wore the same thing the whole time?!" Birch chimed in. "It does work on you, though."

"I was one of the Seven Sages of Destruction, a group of seven extremely powerful demons," Aurra said. "Demons each have a unique spell they perfect over the course of their lives. Mine is Auserlese, the Scales of Obedience, which weighs my soul against the target soul. If I have more mana than they do, then I gain control over their bodies. Forever."

"That's a whole lot better than Dominate Person or a Charm ability!" Calamity realized.

"Whosa what now?" Ichy asked.

"I like that you let them keep speaking while under your control," Kronos said. "Nice touch, if I say so myself. It must be fun to hear them beg for mercy, cry out to their allies to flee as they cut them down, or tearfully apologize as they slaughter the innocents they're supposed to protect. You're a woman of culture, Aurra."

Next up, a black-haired fallen angel flopped on Wile after materializing. Her shoulders slumped slightly, and she wore a dejected look on her face. She barely looked up at the group before her, her eyes watery.

"Sit up straight." Megafin said. Raynare started and quickly sat up properly, as the coyote got up and dusted itself off, her eyes wide.

"Welcome to the Junkheap Caverns. I am Doctor Maximilian Finsworth PHD, the Sea Demon Genius, and this is the domain of the Shadow Hunters. You may refer to me as Dr. Finsworth, or by Megafin. You were saved from death, and as such, shall work with Deadlight to put all under its command," Megafin explained as he smiled cruelly.

Raynare took a deep breath. She had never heard of any being named Megafin before, and this countenance had her worried. However, she didn't think fallen angels even had an afterlife, and at least she wasn't subject to the judgment of the heavens she had betrayed. She quickly decided this was better than nonexistence, or at least was for now.

"... I understand," Raynare said carefully.

"Now, Birch, use the scanner and start us off," Megafin ordered.

"Says here that this chick is Raynare, and was a low-level fallen angel working under some Governor-General Azazel dude," Birch started, grinning.

"Um, explain, please?" Malicia asked, confused and bamboozled.

"Low-level?!" Raynare snapped. "I was one step away from being his second in command, and his true wife!"

"...Anyhow, she, along with a few weaker fallen under her command, was tasked with killing off something called a Sacred Gear user," Birch continued, ignoring the outburst. "This guy, Issei, was the definition of a virgin dweeb, few friends, no powerful allies. She could have just killed him in his sleep, or taken the direct approach and murdered him on his way home. But that isn't what Raynare did! Instead she concocted a whole fake identity, Yuuma Amano, enrolled herself in Issei's school, and asked him out on a date. And of course, overjoyed that such a beauty had fallen for him, Issei did his best to take her on the most romantic date he could. How did Issei do, Raynare? Did he do good?" Birch asked, grinning.

Raynare couldn't help but crack a smile herself. "... Simply put, it was the most boring, corniest date possible. I thought about killing him early, more than once, just to end it."

"But you had to wait for the evening," Polly realized. "Since your pseudonym, 'Yuuma Amano', did mean 'Heaven's Evening Daze'."

"And she sure left him in a daze, come evening!" Birch exclaimed. "Which meant a light spear, straight to the chest even. What do we think about this?"

Megafin and the other Shadow Hunters stared in silence at Raynare for a few moments. Megafin slowly raised his hands, and began to clap. The rest joined in, increasing the pace as the Shadow Hunters gave the fallen angel a round of applause. Raynare beamed, the 'low-level fallen angel' comment fading into the background of her psyche.

"I love that you did it for no reason," Circe said. "You just wanted to see the look in his stupid face. Was it good?"

Raynare nodded in the affirmative, and relaxed. She held herself with confidence now; neither sulking, nor frightened.

Another appeared atop Polly, flopping them both to the floor. She looked down. She was wearing a blue combat suit, somehow, and even more surprising, the Silver Cape was back in her possession. She glanced around the bizarre scenery of the endless junkyard, and examined the group in front of her. She noted their obviously superior position; there was a hierarchy here, and she was at the bottom.

The combat cyborg's artificial golden eyes flickered between specialized lenses. This location was bizarre, and not coherent with physical laws as she understood them, but there were no anomalies in her vision. If this was an illusion, it was very advanced; far beyond anything the Time-Space Administration Bureau would be able to conjure. Lost Logia? Unlikely. They were too cowardly to use them; that was one of the Doctor's issues with the Bureau to begin with.

She knew she was dead, or at least, that's knowledge at the forefront of her mind. Implanting that would be trivial; she had done similar things to some of the junior Numbers when she needed them compliant. Perhaps she had been captured by another group? If so, this terrain made little sense. If they could infiltrate her mind, they could easily extract any knowledge from her they desired.

She needed to consider all possibilities, and determine the probabilities of the unknowns. An Expectimax tree exploded through her mind. 1.8 billion nodes. Prune. Cut off low-probability branches. Ignore no-win scenarios. Fourteen million nodes. Manageable. She required more information; the highest payout branches began with that.

Two and a half seconds had passed since she appeared. An acceptable time to acclimatize.

"May I ask who you are?" Quattro said respectfully, lowering her head slightly.

"I am Megafin, and this is the Shadow Hunters," Megafin answered, grinning.

"Am I to understand that you are a god of fish?" Quattro asked carefully.

"Not a god, a mad scientist actually," he replied. "But most critically, in the Shadow Hunters, I am the leader, and more importantly, a top scientist in Deadlight."

"I am not dead," Quattro stated. "I am in prison, in an orbital facility over an uninhabited world."

"And you never got out," Kronos smirked. "We just got rid of over a century of boring nothing. You should thank us for clearing out the cobwebs."

Quattro frowned. "I calculated at an 88% likelihood that the Time-Space Administration Bureau would require my abilities to safely resolve one or more incidents within ten years of my incarceration."

"And that might have happened, if you hadn't messed with the kid," Megafin said.

Megafin could see that Quattro was still doubtful. She sighed. "Someone, deal with this."

Ink Blotch flipped through her case folder to the end. "Quattro, you kicked the bucket at age 137 in a high-security prison on the surface of Midchilda. The cause of death was a systemic failure of your artificial spine. You were the last surviving Number, and due to the secretive nature of your construction, it was not possible to construct the parts necessary to save you."

Quattro sat and processed this for a few moments. This story sounded absurd, but the remaining possibilities were dwindling fast, and her spinal column was unique among the Numbers, given her need to interface with the Silver Cape. Resisting any longer had a low payout value.

"Very well. I understand," she said plainly.

"That was fast," Kronos noted, and looked up to Megafin. "I like her already."

"Quattro was a member of the Numbers, a group of heavily enhanced cybernetic daughters created by a man named Jail Scaglietti," Ink Blotch began, flipping back to the start. "Quattro was designed for back line intelligence and support, but was eventually equipped for electronic warfare, and given the Silver Curtain Inherent Skill. This allowed her to produce illusions and manipulate machines. And over the course of ten years... You and your sisters got into quite a bit of trouble," she continued, grinning. "To gather the pieces of lost technology and magic needed for Jail's plan, you launched multiple attacks on TSAB facilities, intercepted their field teams, and stole Lost Logia in transit. You were quite thorough, weren't you? There were few survivors of these attacks, making it difficult to identify a common cause."

"It was necessary to maintain a low profile. There are dozens of terrorist groups that could be blamed for an attack with no witnesses," Quattro explained, her mood improving. She hesitated for a moment, but realized that these beings likely had full access to her memories anyway. "I personally insured that more than once. Besides, captive or wounded Bureau agents made excellent test subjects for experimental or newly-acquired artifacts."

As with Aurra before her, black clumps of mana materialized around the center of the entrance, grew, and joined together. Colour was restored to Linie's body as she raised her head, looking around the junkyard with an expressionless face. The small demon lifted her hand, opened and closed it a few times, then looked up.

"Oh, isn't she just the cutest thing?!" Polly exclaimed, hugging the demon with all her might.

Linie looked at them. Most of them were demons. The demons were all stronger than her; probably stronger than any demon Linie had seen aside from Lady Aurra. The fishman in front of them looked strange, with blue scales and red eyes, clad in garb fitting a scientist, possibly beyond her time. Most of the people here didn't have any mana at all.

Linie had no idea what was going on. Powerful demons were sitting beside a fishman who showed no fear, one with absolutely no mana. Linie had learned from other demons that all people had at least some mana.

Cute. Humans call her cute sometimes. Humans like cute things. Therefore, humans who say that like her. Humans who like her tend to let their guard down. She decided it would be best if this group liked her more. She tilted her head slightly. Humans find that cute. Lügner had said so.

"Oh lord, she's so innocent!" Arya exclaimed.

"Linie, I'm Megafin, the Sea Demon Genius," Megafin said. "I'm the one who saved your immortal soul."

"What's a soul?" the small demon asked.

"Why, Linie, that's what you technically are, right now!" Megafin answered. "Maybe your memory is a little fuzzy, you're dead, Linie. Do you remember dying?"

Linie did remember. The human opened himself up for a massive swing. Linie cut him, but it wasn't deep. She couldn't defend herself, and he cut her back. She had no idea how deep it was. Linie could only move one hand. She looked at it. It disappeared, and she disappeared after. Now she was back, in this strange place. Linie was glad she was back. She didn't like disappearing.

"Yes, I do remember," Linie answered. She stared blankly at Megafin and the Shadow Hunters.

"... Not very expressive, is she?" Kronos said to Aurra. "Hey, why don't I begin? So, here's the low-down: Linie was one of Aurra's Executioners, a group of three powerful demons who served as her confidantes and lieutenants. The Executioners were in charge of a plan to infiltrate a human domain Aura had been battling for decades," he continued. "They posed as peace ambassadors, to try to manipulate the local lord into bringing down a magical barrier keeping Aurra's group out. Not that Linie is some brilliant politician," he soon noted. "The actual deception was mostly the work of the other two, Lügner and... His name was apparently not important enough to put in the file. Linie primarily followed this Lügner around, and did everything he said. Actually that's all she did. She does have something going for her, in that she's got exceptional mana detection abilities for her age, and uses that to understand fighting techniques and martial arts and copy them."

As with the others, darkness swirled around the center of the realm, dropping a young, tattooed woman with shoulder-length blonde hair onto Malicia. She quickly looked around the junkyard, her red eyes widening as she took in the strange place she found herself in. She settled her gaze on the Shadow Hunters, cautiously sizing them up.

"Hello Royce," Megafin began. "I'm Megafin, Sea Demon Genius; a servant of a demi-goddess. And the niece of an actually competent one, which I know is a foreign concept to you."

Royce looked around the Junkheap Caverns once again. She looked at the broken buildings, mountains of garbage, heaps of junk and trash, and even some cracked planetoids trapped in this endless junkyard. She swallowed in fear as she noticed the uncountable number of skeletons tumbling over these ruined features. This place made the Frontier look downright pleasant.

"Is this the land of the dead?" Royce asked.

"Hmmm... Well, you could say that, but it ain't really that," Megafin answered.

"Then..." Royce's eyes widened. "... Is this Hell?"

"Oh, no, Royce, you're not in Hell," Megafin said. "This is an abandoned junkyard, hidden between leylines, where poor souls sometimes fall into."

Birch smiled, soaking in the girl's rising terror. "But don't worry, if you were in Hell, you wouldn't be having any sort of conversation. Hell doesn't really do irony or creative punishments, despite what you might think. If you're lucky, you'd be in Pentagram City, living a good life if you don't get your soul owned by one of the more scummy Overlords. If you're unlucky, you'd be pitched into a lake of fire for a thousand years. It really is the worst agony imaginable; sometimes simple works. Then it would burn away everything you are, leaving behind a low-rank demon called a Lemure."

Royce shook her head in a panic, tears of fear starting to well in her eyes.

"Birch, you're going to scare the poor girl before we even get started," Delphini interjected.

"Oh, fine," Megafin said. "Royce, I'm not going to burn you alive. Most likely. Kronos, how about you get started? Tell us all about Royce's life."

Kronos flipped through the Scanner. "Says here that Royce comes from a world dominated by a goddess – and I'm just gonna use that term in the loosest sense possible – named Althena. And seems at some point in the distant past, Althena brought humans to the moon of her world, after her really shit handling of an interloper deity caused mass devastation. Or something to that effect."

"Uh, why are you saying you use the term... goddess...still sounds iffy when I say it out loud, in the loosest sense possible? Care to explain?" Dil prompted.

"Alrighty then," Kronos replied. "Frankly, Althena is one of the more...idiotic... deities. Not only did she fail to protect her own domain, which is apparently a material realm so I'm not even sure if she even has a divine domain, the new world she made is entirely dependent on her power. Apparently she's incapable of making permanent changes even in her own realm. The only permanent change she did make was killing herself, apparently," he continued. "I think she passed her divine energy into the moon or something to that effect. Either way, she turned herself into a mortal, out of some weird notion of love. This is a deity who compares unfavourably to someone like the Brother Gods, of all people. I'm not sure if she could stop someone like...the fucking Donbrothers, maybe not even that creepy cult called the Swords of Logos, and they're not even gods."

"...Althena is dead?" Royce asked.

"...There's a cult based around swords?" Malicia asked.

"Well, it depends what you mean by 'is'; the flow of time is something of a suggestion," Megafin answered. "But yes, there is a cult called the Swords of Logos, no matter how much those guys deny it, the former version of themselves was indeed a cult before Kivatro rehashed them to being somewhat decent, and Althena is dead, or will die. She will live out a normal, mortal life with that odd boyfriend of hers, Alex. And then she will die. And so will he. That has to make you feel a little better, doesn't it, Royce?"

"I wish I could spoil their happy ending," Royce said, before her expression brightened a little. "But I'll take it."

"There's good," Megafin smiled. "Carry on, Kronos."

"Of course. Sorry for the tangent, I just couldn't believe what I was reading," Kronos said, shaking his head. "Royce is a member of the Vile Tribe, one of a varied type of creature banished to the far side of the moon, called the Frontier, for some past transgression. In fact, she's one of the leaders of the Vile Tribe, along with her two sisters. The Frontier is, in all honesty, a wasteland, so they're trying to invade and claim the entire world."

"My my," Ink Blotch observed. "A race banished to a deadly, dark place, led by beauties seeking to invade and reclaim the more hospitable part of the planet. How nostalgic!"

"Wait, huh?!" Ichy exclaimed. "Royce, you...wanted...to escape from what's essentially the Mysterious Beyond?"

"Yes, the Frontier was a nightmare to even survive childhood!" Royce declared. "My sisters and I were born in what's essentially a death trap, suffering punishment for a crime we don't even remember!"

"Oh, don't whine. You're starting to sound like Gengetsu Kibaoni," Megafin admonished. "The Frontier made you strong, didn't it? Just like the Dark Trench did for me. How many normal humans could you and each of your sisters carve through, if you desired?"

Royce gave this some thought. "You have a point, but the Frontier is getting worse. We wouldn't last another generation."

"Call it motivation, then!" Megafin said. "Your main mistake was joining up with that imbecilic simp, Ghaleon. If only we had met while you were alive. My boss has experience in these matters, and could use another world."

"I was wondering about that. Are you saying that each world has its own Goddess?" Royce asked, her curiosity piqued.

"Not precisely. Each alt-verse, shorthand for alternate universe, typically contains one or more deities. Althena was confined to her own," Megafin explained, motioning to the scenery of the Shady Grove. "As I said, Kiko's patrons are competent gods and goddesses. It's the entire reason you're here."

"And the others?" Polly asked.

"AMAYA! Are you there?" a man shouted up at the crystalline sky. "This isn't funny anymore! Let me out NOW! As your king, I demand my freedom!"

Polly crossed her arms and observed this peculiar man with a curious expression. He had salt and pepper hair, but he wasn't old, no more than mid to late thirties. In fact, he was actually rather handsome. His robes were elegant and regal, and though Polly surmised that they must have once been white, time here must have caused them to become a gradient of purple and white. The darker colors were more flattering on him anyway. But the question of how he'd gotten trapped in this dimension was what interested Polly the most, and she was determined to have her answer.

"Now what have we here?" Polly asked.

The man froze mid-shout and slowly turned to face the Shadow Hunters, his eyes wide with confusion. He quickly righted his posture and put on a confident air. He was obviously attempting to save face from his display of hysterics before.

"Well hello there! I didn't know anyone else was in here," he said before his eyes fell upon her crown. "And a machine, at that!"

"Yes, and it is customary to bow before royalty," Mechagodzilla stated.

"Oh, I'm very much aware, but I won't hold it against you for not doing so," the man said with a chuckle. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am King Magnifico of Rosas."

"A fellow monarch, is it?" Mechagodzilla remarked. "I am King Ghidorah, though now I go by Mechagodzilla, and this realm is a part of my dominion."

"Is that so?" King Magnifico asked. "Well, I hope you won't take offense at me saying that thus far, I'm not exactly fond of your dominion. In fact, I'd quite like to leave. Can you help me?"

"That depends on how you got here," Raynare said. "What's your story?"

"Oh, it's nothing really," Magnifico laughed awkwardly. "Just a completely unjustifiable revolution. But you know how that younger generation is with their entitlement! I mean really..."

A jaunty tune began to echo throughout the dungeon, and the Shadow Hunters resigned themselves to the inevitable musical number that was about to ensue.

"I let them live there for free, and did NOT even charge them rent," Magnifico sang. "I cleaned up all their messes and was always there if they had to vent."

Aurra flinched and attempted to bear this ordeal for the sake of getting answers, but patience was wearing thin.

"I gave and gave and gave and gave," he continued, oblivious to the reactions of the Shadow Hunters. "You'd think they'd all be content! And all I wanted was just a little respect. But this was the thanks I- "

"We get it, you did everything for them, and they didn't give anything back!" Arya hissed and the music stopped suddenly.

"... Get?" Magnifico looked at her sheepishly. "Not a... not a musical fan, I take it?"

"Well, not exactly," Birch clarified. "No one here really has objections to a good musical number. In fact, Arya here defended Rasputin's singing on occasion. That song's just...well...poorly written."

"Poorly written?" Magnifico asked, seeming quite offended. "That was going to be a reprise of my big show stopping number!"

Calamity shook her head. "Your voice has potential, but you need a melody worthy of your power. You diminish yourself with such mediocrity. Fear not, we got friends who might be able to help with that, but I think we're drifting away from the question. How did you come to be here?"

Magnifico sighed and rubbed the back of his head, disappointed that he couldn't sing his song. "Long story short, my ungrateful subjects betrayed me and caused my own magic to turn against me. I was dragged into the mirrored tip of the staff that I forged using the power of a... special spellbook."

Aurra raised an eyebrow at that. "A special spell book, you say? What was it?"

"Oh, you know, just your average run of the mill...," Magnifico said non-committedly before hastily adding, "darkmagicspellbook."

"That's it? You really think we don't do dark magic?" Megafin asked. "Some of us here are practitioners of that stuff. Now, which one did you own?"

Magnifico seemed taken aback by Megafin's casual acceptance of dark magic. Back in Rosas, such dark arts were forbidden and taboo. But if this group has practitioners of the same brand of magic, then perhaps this was indeed a potential ally he could open up to.

"It bore no name," Magnifico answered. "But it was leather bound with a green gemstone inlaid in the cover and the image of a dragon ouroboros etched on the front."

Calamity's eyes went wide as Magnifico described the book. She could see it clearly in her mind's eye, and she remembered seeing it long ago when she would sneak into her mother's chambers and look through her magic tomes. Her mother had entrusted her with the most precious spell books, but some were left behind when the Aurochs attacked their mansion. Calamity had always assumed that the fools had burned the books left behind.

"Are you alright?" Magnifico asked when Calamity fell silent.

"I'm fine," Calamity said. "I know the book you speak of. The sorceress who owned it was the same woman from whom I got my own collection of magic tomes. That would certainly explain why you were drawn into this realm."

"Ah, so we're kindred spirits, practicing the same forbidden arts!" Magnifico said excitedly. "I'd love to swap notes with you sometime."

"Perhaps there will be time for that later," Calamity said non-committedly. "You may in fact be of some use to this group, provided, of course, if you agree to help our boss rewrite the cosmos themselves to their liking."

Aurra shrugged her shoulders, signifying that she was willing to join up, as Raynare nodded eagerly, Quattro nodded, Royce bowed in agreement, Malicia facepalmed, Polly nodded, Wile and 2/3 nodded, Dil and Ichy nodded, and Linie tilted her head again.

"I am so in!" Magnifico declared. "But, uh... where do we go from here? This place is a dead end!"

"Don't worry, I know this like the back of my hand." Kronos said, cheekily opening a portal.

---

The group that Birch handpicked for the mission gathered together in Kuja's chambers. The magic hunter named Faith N. Siknes sat at the table with her feet propped up on a stack of Kuja's books, and next to her, Jason "J.D." Dean lit up a cigarette and took a drag.

"You know those things are terrible for your health, kid," Faith pointed out. "You're already such a scrawny little sinner!"

J.D. blew a ring of smoke at Faith and scowled. "You remind me of a couple of dumb bitches I went to high school with."

"Oh yeah? Whatever happened to them?" Faith asked.

"I shot them," J.D. replied, deadpan.

Guiron was in the other side of the room, sharpening his head on a large grinding stone as the musical crook known as Diamond Spark tuned her guitar as the streamer villain known as Screwball played on her phone and the dark mage known as Dark Jr. was studying archaic texts as the crocodile mutant known as Jawcrack was lazing in a makeshift lake, and they all were actively trying to ignore the Grandmaster, who had put on the party mix medley and was currently in the process of "getting down with his bad self."

"Oh yeah, and here's the part where you get really crazy with the hips," Grandmaster declared as he started to wildly gyrate. "I start all my orgies this way!"

"What makes you think I wanted to know that?" Weirbird, an odd troodontid, asked with a terrified hiss.

"Who wouldn't want to know that?" Grandmaster asked. "I'm irresistible!"

Flurious, Mig, Benglo and Doctor Wily, meanwhile, were conversing with Deadlight's newest recruit, a supervillain named Jonathan Crane a.k.a. The Scarecrow, along with Dr. Dourmind, a gray wolf in a mad scientist coat, who was laughing as she flipped switches on the replica Emot-a-Tron, a large, ominous machine with swirling colors and large canisters. And the funny thing about the omniverse is that alternate counterparts of different villains can join different competing factions. When Aprilily found out that both Ansem and Mozenrath had recruited two different versions of Scarecrow for their own teams and that another Scarecrow led his own team, she just had to get in on the action. She may have found this Scarecrow on the most boring version of Gotham City plagued by a Batman who sounded like he had lung cancer, but this Scarecrow knew how to play the villain game well.

"Once I got this bad boy's systems at full power, all the joy and laughter in Giggle Grove would've been mine to control! No more happiness for them! It'd be all for ME, the great and wonderful DR. DOURMIND!" Dourmind bragged.

Dr. Dourmind cackled maniacally as lightning struck in the background.

"But if the city was already filled with your fear toxin, or in Dourmind's case, suffering from crippling depression, why did both of you set off, both on horseback, to spread more or cause more depression?" Flurious asked.

Scarecrow shrugged. "I like to see the look of fear in my victims' eyes."

Dourmind also shrugged. "What can I say? I looked like I was the reaper of joy itself."

"Bah! A horse! I would never be caught dead on such an archaic biological creature!" Wily scoffed. "Hmm... note to self, invent a superior mechanical alternative to the horse."

"They already have those," Mig stated. "They're called vehicles."

"Not ones designed by ME, which means there's always room for improvement," Wily insisted.

One of the new recruits was a guy in a black full body bodysuit, having white circles on his face that symbolize sound, and a brown coat over it. The guy was waving his head back and forth and muttered to himself: "Tick, tock, tick, tock…"

"Cut it out, Onomatopoeia! Boss is really serious about the plans here!" The thorny devil, called Thorne, said as he poked the other guy in the chest with his gun.

"Sorry, it's a quirk of mine, can't help it…now, what was it you needed my services for?" the other guy asked.

"There's the X-Squad, who may get in our way…and you have a knack for dealing with non-powered vigilantes." Flurious said.

"That's just a hobby. I normally take assassination contracts." Onomatopoeia muttered. He then heard some water dripping in the lair, which was an abandoned building. "Ploink, ploink…" he said with each drop of water that fell down.

"Focus!" Nova, the star-nosed mole dressed in a pink dress, said.

"I'm focusing! Now, ice pop…" Onomatopoeia asked.

"Flurious, you blathering dolt!" Flurious snapped.

"Right…anyways." Onomatopoeia said.

"We don't want the X-Squad getting in our way, and with what the boss has planned, we need you to help us deal with them. It's a simple deal. You get to do your 'hobby' and get paid for it." Flurious replied.

"You got yourself a deal, bub! I can't wait…" he said as he made a gun shape with his left hand and aimed. "Bang, bang!"

"Alright, everyone, settle down, we've got details to talk, and plans to hatch," Braig announced as he, Aprilily, Megafin and Kuja, along with the rest of the Shadow Hunters, walked into the room, as a purple weasel and Airy were slapping each other.

Meanwhile, Carrotia the Rabbit and a black silhouette were fighting, but it was hard to tell them apart since they used exactly the same moves. One threw a punch, the other would too. One would launch a kick, the other would too.

"The crane kick…" Carrotia noted.

"The star uppercut…" the other noted.

They simultaneously removed their masks. On the left was Carrotia, on the right was another purple weasel, only this one was female and more beautiful to say the least.

"Carro?/Nic?" They asked one another before they squealed in joy and hugged.

"It has been so long!" Carrotia said.

"I know, right?! Oh, never thought of all places, I'd see you in a junkyard…" the purple weasel girl responded.

The other villains looked wide-eyed at the two. "You know her?" Faulke Wolf, Bearenger and the Shadow Hunters asked in unison.

"Of course, she's my sister…step-sister actually. Everyone, meet Nicolette Weasel, Nic for short." Carrotia introduced her.

"Oh…I feel guilty for firing at Carrotia's family, I'm sorry, her and I were training and I thought you were her and…" Faulke said sheepishly.

"It's nothing. A friend of my sis is a friend of mine. Lemme guess, my bro started the actual fight?" Nic said as she motioned at the other purple weasel, who regained consciousness.

"Oh no, don't tell me that's Carrotia!" the male purple weasel moaned.

"You better believe it Nack, deal with it! Just because you never liked her, doesn't mean I let you ruin our reunion. Hey guys, bury the hatchet and go meet my sister and her friends." Nic reacted as she turned to the duck and the polar bear. "Meet my idiot brother Nack, Bean the Dynamite and Bark the Polar Bear. Together, we're the bounty hunter team known as Team Hooligan…though I really need to change that name." Nic introduced.

"These are my friends, Faulke and Bearenger, and my genius girlfriend, Irys Zeppelin." Carrotia said as she wrapped an arm around a blonde girl clad in pink and black. "And this is the unofficial Shadow Hunters mascot, Rubi Blue!" Carrotia lifted up a really tiny fluffy pony with a red, silky mane, and the smoothest sky blue fluff with a small crown on her head. Her green eyes looked confused as she sniffed the air.

"Waah! Dis smel nawt pwettee!" She began to bawl, as Birch quickly pulled out a spray gun labeled 'Blueberry Muffin scent' and started spraying willy nilly as Rubi Blue giggled a bit, and held her stubby hooves out expectantly.

"Hugsies daddeh! Hugsies!" The pony chirped to Irys as Irys was about to wrap her hand around the small pony as a makeshift hug, but decided that she should train her a bit in manners.

"Say please Rubi Blue, or no hugs." Irys told her firmly, but not meanly.

"No hugsies?" She said, her small voice wavering.

"I will give you hugsies, just say please." Irys replied, a bit firmer.

"Pweeze?" She tried, and the mage wrapped a hand with lightning surging through it around her, as she held it with those small hooves, a smile unwillingly spread across her face as Rubi Blue started getting electrocuted, somehow surviving getting 12 minecraftplex watts of electricity getting sent into her body, but then Irys put her down when she started staring at Carrotia. "Muma! Mah tummy haz owies! No wan owies!"

Birch quickly grabbed two bowls, a box of Cheerios, and a bottle of water. Rubi happily cheered. "Yay! Birchy give Woobi Bwoo nummies!" as she placed the bowls on the floor in front of her, filled one with water, the other with Cheerios, smiling that she already (kinda) knew her name. The little Fluffy opened her smiling mouth, took a breath, as if she were scuba-diving, and dunked her head into the Cheerios.

"OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM!' She exaggerated as she vacuumed up the cereal, and was soon licking out the little individual circles at the bottom. The hunters just sat there, watching her with grins or looks of confusion plastered onto their faces. She scooted over a bit, over the water bowl now, and repeated the process. But now she pulled her face out right away, sputtering water, her face wet and her mane wet down with water, her crown having tumbled off her head and landing beside her. She cried a little, and Kronos grabbed a towel and helped dry her off and put the crown back on Rubi Blue's head. After the whole episode, She carefully sipped the water instead.

"A bit younger than I'd expect, but certainly a cute looking girl. You're lucky!" Nic complimented.

"Yeah, lucky that you even can get a chick considering you prefer both men and…" Nack muttered, but Nic slapped him on the back of the head. "…I'm shutting up!" he added quickly as he rubbed the sour spot on his head.

"Yay, now we're one big happy family! Bunny Carrie and the thunder girl can be the mommies, the pony's their child and I'll be the annoying nephew that comes and asks for money!" Bean said excited.

"He's…unusual." Irys noted.

"I know…his head may not be at the right spot, but he's useful, he's good with explosives. He used to work for the Battle Bird armada, but got kicked out because of his antics." Nic answered.

"But that big red button was so shiny and beautiful! It begged me to be pressed…that was the second biggest and best explosion I've ever caused." Bean replied. Bark just rolled his eyes.

"Fuzzball doesn't say much, does he?" Kronos said as he pointed at Bark.

"He has reason to. When Eggman took over the surface, his family was lost to them. Unable to save them, he swore an oath of silence to respect their memory. He looks tough, but he has a heart of gold. He just can get carried away at times." Nic explained.

"Hmmmmmm. I thiinnnkkkkk... Bored!"

Jack rolled his eyes, throwing aside the copy of last week's Arkham Inquirer he'd been trying to read (Hagfish Slime Disaster on the Old Marsh Road: 69 wounded, 27 Dead!), and raised himself up in his hammock. He'd had a few of his Maniacs string up a collection of them in his Domicile of Delight's grand theater from various hooks and eyelets that had previously been used in the complicated series of winches required to lift varied and sundry performers (and spotlights, corpses, giant blenders, etc) into the air, and was currently plopped inelegantly in one that was jury-rigged from paracord and old rope, lavishly padded with novelty pillows stolen from the shops-ones with his face, of course! Nothing but the best for Jack Schmidt!

In normal times, Jack would be relaxing in Lord Fear's Lantern, along with Chance and the other Heralds of Fear, plotting and planning for the upcoming Halloween season in lavish comfort. In normal times, he would have left the Domicile in the care of his Maniacs, who would repair whatever damage their home and their scarezones and tools had acquired during the Halloween season and practice their skills without his supervision. In normal times, Jack wouldn't have to experience the brutal heat and sweltering humidity of summer. In normal times, Jack wouldn't have to even look at a damn mosquito, never mind having to acquaint himself with the chemical stink and greasy feel of bug spray (for all the good it did). In normal times, as a matter of fact, the only mosquitoes he would have to come within spitting distance of would be some sort of giant knife-armed mutant mosquito-men in the haunted houses.

Come to think of it, had they ever had mutated mosquito men in any of the houses or scare zones? He couldn't seem to recollect any- quite a wasted opportunity with the central location of the Horror Nights being in Florida of all places. He made a mental note to ask the Caretaker if he'd saved any of the Extermin-air from Bzzzcon- giant mosquitos were sure to be a hit! Ah, inspiration! It was at times like these that Jack remembered just why he was in charge- because he was so brilliant! Ideas just flowed into his skull like wine into a goblet, like toxic waste into a municipal water supply, like blood out of his victims!

Self-congratulations aside, these were not normal times, and Jack was not relaxing in the cozy if eldritch confines of the Lantern. And why is that, you might ask? Why were poor Jack and his lovely companion denied their opportunity to rest, recuperate, and reanimate in exquisite comfort and unholy style? Why was Jack forced to babysit Maniacs and Heralds alike while denied his well-deserved vacation? Because some stupid little shit from the 'Legendary Truth' broke Lord Adaru's lantern!

Jack still wasn't sure how a gaggle of egghead researchers had managed to sneak into Universal Studios and pinch the Lantern right back out from under Jack's nose, or what the hell the various glowing fiber optic cables they'd hooked up to the Lantern had been intended to do, but his anger when he had discovered the Lantern's glass spiderwebbed with cracks was… notable. He was pretty sure Eddie was still picking pieces of barbequed egghead from between his teeth… although that might say more about Eddie's poor oral hygiene than it did about how much researchers he'd eaten. His anger (and, not that he'd admit it to anyone, but fear as well) when he and the other Heralds had attempted to open the gateway to the Lantern realm on the 1st of December only to see the Lantern flare briefly with unholy light before sputtering out in a cloud of reeking black smoke were matched only by the shock and fury of the other Heralds, and a rather protective group of Shadow Hunters.

The Icons had tried to fix it, of course- they could do no less! If they hadn't made a good faith effort to repair the Lantern, Lord Adaru's wrath would have made Jack and Eddie's cannibal BBQ festival seem like a ten-year old's temper tantrum. Elssa and Calamity have attempted to perform some sort of magic the Storyteller had picked up from the Wicked Witch of the West, only to see the Lantern throw her spell back into her face in a gout of grass-green fire that she had only barely been able to deflect harmlessly up into the sky, Jack, Skalamander and Karl had tried applying a little good old-fashioned percussive maintenance with boot, crystal fist, hammer and cane to the stubborn thing before Eddie had dragged Jack off of it, and Chance had even tried patching the cracks with spray-on adhesive. Jack hadn't even realized Gorilla Glue was flammable, but the Lantern had sparked with purple electricity, and the resulting fire had traveled back along the vapor stream and detonated the can in Chance's hand like a nuke. The resulting explosion would have killed a mortal, and as it was Chance was burned lobster pink and bald as an egg. Took her weeks to look like her old self, and she claimed her eyebrows had grown back, in her words, 'kinda funky-looking.'

Regardless, the Lantern was thoroughly fucked. The Heralds had convened an emergency council, otherwise known as 'yelling at each other over beer and egghead cold cuts,' until they had hashed out a crude plan. None of the Heralds were particularly masterful sorcerers or mad scientists, being more the magical equivalent of your tech-competent grandpa who could make his email work if all went well, but thought that a 'server' was a fru-fru term for the cute young woman who brought him overpriced chicken fingers and watery beer at the sports bar on game night, and so they turned first to the acknowledged masters of black magic, the Shadow Hunters, and begged Megafin for aid, and shelter. The price that the mad doctor had charged was steep, both in victims to be shipped to his lab, and in various rare and occultly significant materials, but if he could repair the Lantern, almost no price was too high.

"And if you ask about the crabs walking around, you should know that a mad entomologist is the reason..." Megafin said.

"Don't call me that!" A female voice echoed through the junkyard. Everyone looked up at the wall beside them and there stood a tall woman in her twenties. She had long fiery red hair that had been braided into a pair of claw-like pigtails. She wore a copper red suit with net stocking and a pair of red gloves. She also had both knee and shoulder pads. This didn't hide her muscular belly nor her clawed fingers though. Her skin was white as milk. She smirked, revealing her sharp teeth. "I am not a mad entomologist. Sides, I never got my PHD."

"Who's that?" Magnifico asked as he stared at this strange woman.

"That is Crustacea." Megafin calmly answered.

The strange woman named Crustacea jumped down, dug her finger-claws into the wall and slid down the metal wall. She then jumped down onto the ground.

"She is Birch's cousin." Megafin stated.

"YOUR COUSIN?!" Delphini asked in shock.

"Yep, and my parents thought she would want to kill me. Like her mom, and unfortunately for them, they didn't exactly factor in me going cuckoo on Prom Night." Birch explained.

Crustacea huffed. "My mom thought disgusting arachnids were the key to conquering the world. It was almost as pathetic as those tiny bugs Auntie Cara blabbed about, but I know the truth. Crustaceans are the better arthropods and the true powerhouse of this world." She held up a small device that looked like a tiny mic. Her thumb pressed down on a button and the device gave off a high-pitched sound. About a dozen giant crabs emerged out of a nearby tank and soon stood near Rubi Blue, as the fluffy pony nuzzled one of them.

"You shouldn't count me out yet!" A male voice exclaimed loudly, as a man with long, almost frog-like legs and green, leathery skin crawled out the wall. His clothes were somewhat more usual with a sleeveless vest, white shorts and a necklace of crocodile teeth but he still looked more like a monster than an actual human.

"What the devil are you?" 2/3 asked.

"I am the reptilian menace. I am Silus Snake!" He answered with a certain flare.

Some of the newer Shadow Hunters groaned, unimpressed.

"What?" The man asked.

"No, we get it, fits your style and all. It just doesn't sound right." Diamond Spark said.

"Yeah, you're right, I need a better villain name." The man agreed and pondered with a finger to his chin. "I would've been Dr. Reptile, but that'd leave out the amphibians, and my lawyers said I legally still own the name 'Silas Snake', sooooooo..."

"What do you want?" Kronos said.

"I want to avenge all the wrongs done to reptiles and amphibians alike and overthrow humanity. Or possibly overthrow humanity and then avenge the wrongs done to reptiles and amphibians. I am kind of new to this villain stuff, so if you could give me some pointers."

Then, from out of the shadows, a figure dressed in biker garb and a spider mask descended from the rafters and did a backflip onto one of the tables.

"Hey there! Nice to meet ya!" Black Spider said in a smug yet chipper sounding voice. "Real name's Johnny LaMonica, but you can call me Black Spider."

Black Spider removed his mask, revealing his face underneath, and what they saw shocked him.

"He looks like Parker!" Screwball exclaimed.

"I dunno, he looks more like Andrew Garfield to me." Kronos replied.

"I see that look in your eyes, young Liza Allan," Megafin said smugly, "and, yes, after seeing Spider-Man in action, we had to have our own, naturally."

"Let's see if he can keep up," Crustacea scoffed.

"Oh, trust me, I can do whatever a spider can," Black Spider insisted. "You guys'll have to keep up with me."

"So, is this meeting about the mistletoe that someone's been hanging all over the place?" Nack asked. "Because I didn't appreciate being caught underneath it!"

"Well, to be fair, the people who saw it said you're a good kisser," Solar, a pop star vampire, remarked. "Grandmaster told me you used tongue and everything."

"SHUT UP!" Nack shouted.

"No, no, nothing like that," Birch said, as she pulled a book out from under Faith's feet. "No, the reason for this season is actually a little Christmas joy ride that might just turn into a slay ride."

"Uh, Birch, you said sleigh ride, doesn't a joy ride mean we get cars and just go wild on the road?" Guiron pointed out.

Wily slapped his forehead. "Oaf! She obviously said slay, as in to slay something, as in to kill."

"English is such a weird language," Grandmaster remarked, "though actually not as complex as South Glorbian. Man, does that require some tongue twisting like nyeh nyah nyoh."

Grandmaster proceeded to contort his tongue in a variety of twisted and uncomfortable permutations.

"As I was saying," Birch said, as she opened the book. "We're going after a mystical artifact known as the Black Soulstone."

An illusion of a black crystal emerged from the pages of the book.

"Black Soulstone?" Cortez, the cyan badger, asked. "That sounds a bit too precious for our tastes."

"And you would be correct in thinking that," Braig replied. "For those of you who didn't have a Xemnas to monologue endlessly about the secrets of the universe, the Black Soulstone was an artifact of incredible power created by the renegade Horadrim called Zoltun Kulle. Unlike other Soulstones, which could contain only one souls, the Black Soulstone was intended to capture and contain many, and in particular was capable of trapping all seven of the Great Evils, and it was successful, but backfired horribly when Diablo used the artifact to make himself the Prime Evil, and the reason it was sent to the world we're heading to when the deranged angel called Malthael yoinked the stone and doctored it in order to use it as a weapon to kill all humanity to and some Eternal Conflict thing."

Lunar, Solar's sister, made a face as if she smelled something rotten. "And why would we want anything to do with such a thing?"

"Because power is power," Megafin answered. "Doesn't really matter if it's not exactly our tastes. We can still use all that power to give ourselves a leg up in the cosmic order. Plus, as an added bonus, we'd be able to use the yokai as a free fuel source. We also got a new guy by the name of King Magnifico," Megafin continued. "He had a spellbook of forbidden magic that Calamity's mother used to own. But, here's the snag, we don't quite know where it came from before that, and, hey, magic that potent usually has something supremely dangerous and powerful at the end of the trail. Mig, Benglo, Flurious, you three know corruption magic and treasure hunting pretty intimately, so I want you three to help us find some answers. Got the concept?"

"Very well," Flurious nodded. "I consent to this mission."

"Not like we have a choice in the matter," Mig scoffed.

"But we do accept and understand, Megafin," Benglo hastily added. "May we see the book?"

Magnifico's spellbook appeared in his hands. The emerald dragon ouroboros on the cover shimmered in the dim light.

"Gentle hands," Magnifico warned. "It's on loan to you for the day. Can't return it to me in pieces. Well, hey, ya could, but Calamity here would probably kill you."

"We'll be careful," Benglo agreed as he took the book from Calamity.

"Ah! This is Blight Magic, isn't it?" Mig asked as he ran a paw over the cover. "Yes, I believe this power is known amongst our people."

"How wonderful, we get to visit the fleabags' homeworld," Flurious muttered under his breath. "Let us make one point extraordinarily clear," Flurious then growled. "I shall cooperate with you both for the sake of the mission, but I do not care for either of you. And should you attempt to betray me in any way, I shall return you both to the Shadow World TODAY! Is that clear?"

"You don't intimidate us," Mig snapped. "How about you don't betray us, and we won't have to destroy you?"

"I think we're all expressing the same sentiment," Benglo interjected before further conflict could break out. "This mission won't have any betrayal by either party. Agreed?"

"Hmm, it certainly seems to be an intriguing power," Kuja remarked. "A spotlight to shine upon us on the omniverse's stage. With a power like that, even Ansem would think twice about crossing our path."

"Then let's take our show on the road, shall we?" Calamity suggested.

Bean furrowed his brow. "I don't think I'm gonna like where this is going..."

"But first, we saw that the Black Soulstone was shattered into seven parts, so reunite them, we get the Black Soulstone! But to do so, we need a seventh player, since myself, Kronos, Birch, Faith, Wile and Guiron are gonna handle the other six." Megafin said, as he pulled in some sort of cauldron with a monkey monster named Professor Bobo's help. The two found a hut which belonged to a certain zebra, but she isn't around any longer, so it was easy for them to swipe what they needed for the ritual at hand.

"Well, this'll be fun." Wrangler, the elephant seal in Inuit clothes, said. "How are we going to be doing this again?"

"Oh trust me, I saw this in a movie once." Aprilily said as she prepares to focus on her magic. "Okay, let's see if this works..."

Aprilily fired a bolt into the cauldron causing it to stir a bit...but nothing happened. The odd man with a brain in a pan, Brain Guy, sighed as he used psychic powers to make the cauldron come to life. The Observer felt like his new boss needed some extra help.

Megafin smirked as he took out some bones, chanting. "Bones of the father...unknowingly stolen." The fish monster threw them into the pot eagerly. "And yes, they were from the dad of the person we're reviving too."

"Like father, like son. Think about it, won't you?" Albert Caine, the Caretaker, asked cheekily, making the others roll their eyes at this.

"Okay, what the fuck are you doing?"

Vox walked into the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee, his suit now looking cleaner, only to see the group shoving piles of sour candy into the cauldron across their shared kitchen counter.

"Doing necromancy and making battery acid." Kronos casually said.

"Kronos, I totally hear you, but still, what?"

He pointed at the sour candy and at cans of Monster and White Claw being poured into the cauldron, as if that would explain anything. Davy Jones looked on in confusion, as Vox lightly nudged his head towards Kronos and the other Shadow Hunters with a look that clearly said: "Do YOU know what they're doing?" Davy seemed equally confused.

"Franklin, sorry to do this, but I'm going to need a part of you."

"No problem, Dr. Finsworth! Steve used to break parts of me off all the time back when I was with him."

TV's Frank took out a machete, just another item that he stole from the hut. The minion braced himself...and cut his arm right off, causing him to scream in pain as it fell right into the cauldron.

"Flesh of the Servant...willingly sacrificed." Megafin said.

"And add the ribs and..." Dr. Laurence Erhardt said eagerly, making the others look at him. "Oh, sorry. The robots rub off on me."

"Okay, might I ask again, why the hell are you ruining the kitchen?" Vox said, stealing a piece from one of the random piles.

"Necromancy and battery acid. We're giving you a choice here, you either stay and help out or you get the fuck out of here." Megafin bluntly said.

Vox should've seen Raynare's next line coming from a mile away.

"Do you think Vox produces enough battery acid to fuel this spell on his own?"

"Raynare, if you do not shut up right now, I swear."

Screw this, he was getting out of here. Whatever was going on, the television demon doesn't want to be a part of what's essentially an exercise in how much drugs they can do before someone dies. Right as he was about to see his way out through the nearest security camera, Davy grabbed and dragged him over.

"You have no clue what they're doing either, why would you drag me down with you?"

"Young man, what's a little bit of harmless fun? Besides, look how excited my grandkid seems about this. How bad can it be? The worst that can happen is they blow up the kitchen again and we have to call up some random slave to handle it."

"Okay then, one more thing: Blood of the Enemy, forcibly given." Calamity said.

"No problem! I got it right here!" Dr. Erhardt exclaimed as he took out a mason jar of blood, labeled "Joel Robinson's".

"Where did you get that?" Aurra asked, a bit startled by the literal jar of blood.

"Oh, all Gizmonics employees have to give out blood samples on their first day. Believe me, I gave a lot when I first came to work at the institute. I think it's for cloning."

"Nice, let me see!" Professor Bobo exclaimed as he grabbed for the jar...only to push it off of Dr. Erhardt's hands, knocking it into the cauldron, along with the rest of the candy and energy drinks. "Oops!"

"Don't worry, Bobo, you did good..." Megafin said with a laugh, ignoring Bobo's stupidity.

Suddenly, the cauldron began to shake, rattle, roll and boil like mad. The Shadow Hunters sensed that something's about to happen, causing them all to back off. And then, it happened. A huge beam of light shot out of the cauldron, jutting up into the sky.

"Wait, is this drinkable? Like properly drinkable?" Elssa Strict, the Storyteller, asked.

Kronos nodded enthusiastically and waited to see who would give it a try first.

"Eh, I've had weirder in my mouth," Dil volunteered. She quickly recovered from the, admittedly vile, taste and passed a bit over to Ichy, who took a sip and miraculously seemed to enjoy their creation, as Rubi Blue took a sip, and started growing and shrinking in size in a coked up fugue state and started running around the junkyard at speeds surpassing the Flash, Sonic and even Speedy Gonzalez, her words lost to gibberish. Ichy then passed it to the last of the Vees. Vox promptly blue screened, and glitched out for a bit before declaring:

"This shit was so worth all that trouble."

As the explosion cleared, everyone gasped as something appeared, laughing madly...

---

Despite some of the pointers she got from her students and friends, Celestia was easily overwhelmed by the Purple Nightmares. They were about to rob her when-

"Beggin' your pardon, ladies and gents."

Everyone turned to see a tall figure, leaning against the alley wall.

"But you should please leave this fine young lady alone." he spoke.

Clubs chuckled. "Oh, yeah! Says who?"

The figure walked into the light and lifted his hat, revealing he had a TV for a face, before it flickered out and was revealed to be a hologram, as McGlitch revealed herself.

"Says me." she said.

Celestia was shocked to see that the figure was a young lady! The Purple Nightmares on the other hand, burst out laughing.

One of the male Purple Nightmares, named Clubs, looked in confusion after he stopped laughing, "Do I still have brain freeze?"

"Does that girl look like she's dressed for a party?" A female member, named Stryke, asked.

Another male, called Switchblade, spoke up, "What's with the freaky costume? A little too early for Halloween."

The leader, Night Terror, approached, "I don't know who you are, but you're gonna regret leaving the rock you crawled out of!"

Jade smirked. "I'm not gonna ask you again, just leave this woman alone and get outta here."

Clubs laughed. "Yeah, and who's gonna make us, you?!"

"Yep."

The Nightmares just burst out laughing again.

"What are you gonna do, try and show us the news?!"" Stryke teased.

"How about you look at me and see for yourself?"

"What-"

"I said look at me!"

It was not a request.

The Purple Nightmares looked into her left eye, as Celestia quickly ran off, as it glowed a demonic purple. They turned pale, started trembling, and sweat rolled down their faces as a low moan began to rattle from their throats.

"Um, boss, isn't this a tad much?" A dismayed Kiko protested.

"Don't worry. They're far less perceptive than that brat, Godatz, ever was! Their sanity will simply crack rather than completely breaking," Jade said.

"Is that supposed to reassure us?!" Lixdan protested.

"No."

"No… No no no no no… That's not… That's not possible," Night Terror wailed, tears running down his cheeks.

"It really is."

"You're not… You can't… You can't be-"

"I am, bitch."

"It's so… It's so big… I didn't… No… I can't… I'm important! I matter!" The leader of the Purple Nightmares screamed in denial.

"Screamed the dust speck to the storm."

"I… I…" Night Terror whimpered, the blood draining from his face. "I'm nothing…"

"Yes," McGlitch said cheekily, smirking at the Purple Nightmares, who have seen the full scope of her power. "You're but background characters in a grand stage."

Night Terror threw up several times and then curled into a fetal position, sobbing and hyperventilating, as the rest of the Purple Nightmares fainted.

"Oh, cool, the boss completely destroyed them!" Zoey enthusiastically.

"What did you do?!" A horrified Balzuur demanded.

"People like them try to make themselves feel better by making others feel small," McGlitch explained. "So I simply showed these...brats... just how tiny they actually are. Round some of them up, leave the rest, including the big guy, for the cops to handle, what they'll say will be of no importance. Now, what do we do with Knockoff Ivy over there?" McGlitch said, seeing someone clad in greens using a version of the Wild Violet like a machinegun-esque pistol.

This attack on the civilians didn't go uninterrupted, as a certain purple Runabout carrying two passengers was coming towards her. With McGlitch in the middle of the road, The Runabout's driver stomped on the brakes, stopping inches away from actually hitting the smug leader of Deadlight.

"Confound it, woman!" McGlitch heard the blue-skinned woman driver yell, "Get outta the blasted street!"

"Maldición, Dana!" The flame-themed luchador shouted at the driver, "Solo dale vuelta! Están justo detrás de nosotros!"

"Hot Rock, You know I can't understand a blasted word your saying!" The driver, Dana, barked back.

The luchador, Hot Rock, grumbled before replying, "I said to go around her! They're right behind us!"

"Alrighty then, room for more?" McGlitch said, sliding into the car as Kiko, Zoey, Lixdan, Doctor O lifted some of the Purple Nightmares into the car, as Hot Rock tried to tell them that they didn't have much room.

As the group scrambled to try and drive off, the plant girl looked more at the car they were driving, becoming enraged as she looked.

"You monsters!" She shouted, causing the two to stop their bickering to look at the girl with confusion as she continued ranting, "How dare you drive in that gas guzzler! Do you know how much pollution you're adding to the atmosphere?! You're choking the environment!"

Instinctively, the vines that draped from her shoulders grew in size and length as they thrashed around like angry serpents. The vines then wrapped themselves around the girl's own car behind her and with great strength, raised the car above her head.

The two panicked as Dana shifted the car into reverse and stomped on the accelerator right before Leslie slammed the front of her car at them, but she ended up hitting the pavement and caving in the front of her car.

"Damn It!" She shrieked as she lifted the car back up, "Now look what you made me do!"

"You did that yourself, pendejo!" Hot Rock called out, as Kiko froze the plant girl solid, before lightly tipping her over, shattering the plant girl to pieces.

---

Atop a tall, steep mountain on a remote island, a fortress was situated. It looked every inch the base of a wicked supervillain, which was fortunate, since that is exactly the sort of person who lived there.

Inside, gadgetry gleamed with neon and laser, stirring up new energy sources here and there. The walls were mostly red, matching the uniforms of the army of minions who patrolled the base on guard for intruding threats, which they did as breaks between their coffee and donuts rather than the other way around.

Today, however, the conference room had been dusted off. Quite literally, as it hadn't been used to draft a scheme since the current owner of the base had moved in. He'd never really seen a need for a room that would seat more than two. However, after so many failures had left him empty-handed in the evil department, he had settled on a new direction: gathering as many like minds as he could find in the same room and creating a think tank of pure evil.

Which wasn't really that palatable of an idea at first, given that he'd worked with most of these people before and hadn't been able to stand a lot of them, but somehow, he kept coming back to the thought, and it definitely wasn't because he desperately wished he had a pack of evil friends to laugh with.

A projector screen had been set up at the far end of the conference room. The four who had been assembled for the purposes of this strategy meeting were seated around the shining crimson table, looking various degrees between eager and apathetic at the blank screen. The fifth present, the ringleader of this entire operation, stood before them, pointer in hand.

He was of average height and build, though, really, his long navy-blue coat made it look like his shoulders were just a bit broader than the reality. His black hair was swept back into the smallest of ponytails, threatening to go completely untamed if not restrained. His smile was wide with malicious glee, and his eyes sparkled with the prospect of ill-gotten gains. One of those eyes had a small scar situated just below it. Most strikingly of all, his very skin was a soft yet distinct shade of sky blue.

This was Dr. Drakken, and he presided over the very first meeting of what he had determined was the Drakken Crime Syndicate.

"Fellow villains," he began in an even tone. "We are gathered here today because – "

He did a double take, counting the people at the table. "…Weren't there supposed to be seven of you?" he asked in confusion. "What happened to the old guy and his son?"

"Ye didn' hear?" The response came from a short, stocky man bearing a short yet thick brown beard and clothed in a tartan kilt. As was customary, this man, Duff Killigan, was not far from his weapon of choice; a set of golf clubs was positioned in a bag that was propped against his area of the table. "The Seniors decided to go an' give up evil. Daft decision, if ye ask me."

"WHY WOULD ANYBODY GO AND DO A THING LIKE THAAAAAT?" Drakken whined in dismay.

"Apparently," a posh voice scoffed across the table from Duff, "Senior felt it was simply time to retire, and that he'd worn out all the good schemes." The speaker, one Monty "Monkey Fist" Fisk, was clothed in jet-black kung fu attire, loose to allow for a wide range of movement – as one would need if they, as Monty did, had gotten their joints modified to more simian flexibility for the purpose of ancient monkey-related martial arts. "As for the boy, he's managed to get himself laughed out of three different reality shows based around 'talent.' If nothing else, he's earning his keep as the most infamously terrible singer in the world."

"I've watched all the memes based on his auditions!" a bespectacled and heavyset woman with short, dark hair chirped; her attire was pink, fastened at the zipper with a beanbag otter that featured iridescent wings. "Not that it's funny to laugh at others who can't sing, but some of those edits are just so ceeeee-ute!"

This was Amy "DNAmy" Hall, perhaps the person Drakken had been most reluctant to invite to the summit. After all, their last alliance had possibly been the most uncomfortable partnership Drakken had ever been in, at the end, anyway. However, he had to admit she had the brains and the skill to complement the rest of his rogues. "Disgusting," he sneered, wrinkling his nose. "To think anyone would turn down the occupation of villainy in favor of – REST AND RELAXATION! Does anyone know the value of hard work and manipulative scheming anymore? Oh, well, no matter. What happened to the other boy I invited? Don't tell me HE'S reformed, too."

"Oh, he's got a few more minutes left on his mutation," Amy related. "I'd peg it at about fifteen, tops."

"Well, go tell him to hurry it up," Drakken sneered. "I'm trying to have a meeting of the minds!"

"Yeeeeaaaaah," the last person at the table snarked, "see, you're implying that there's actually more than one functioning brain at this table." This woman, slender and athletic, was Drakken's longstanding partner in crime, Shego. Her thick raven hair flowed down to her waist; her light-green-tinted skin was offset by a bodysuit of black and green.

"I know I'm the one that functions," Monkey Fist droned. "How would you classify the rest?"

"Oh, monkey man got jokes," Shego snapped back.

"You can't rush mutation!" Amy insisted in response to Drakken's query. "He simply REFUSED to show up unless he was picture-perfect, and I can hardly blame him! He's just going to look so ADORABLE when he's all done! I'm just so proud of him! Getting used to such drastic mutations and using them for such twisted schemes at such a tender age – "

"I'm not waiting fifteen minutes for him," Drakken groaned. "One of you take notes or something so we can catch him up later."

"Not it," Shego and Monkey Fist chorused.

"Already on it!" Amy was jotting down introductory points in a bright pink heart-shaped notepad, a feathery pink pen serving as her writing utensil.

"Fellow villains," Drakken began again, starting to pace back and forth before the table. "Those of us who actually have respect for the craft are assembled here today – "

"If ye wanted ta get the best o' the best," Duff asked, "then why no' invite yer cousin?"

"I'm not inviting MOTOR ED to the DRAKKEN CRIME SYNDICATE," Drakken seethed. "He doesn't have the REFINEMENT."

"And you do?" Shego snorted.

"Oh, what about that delightful man who does villainy on a budget?" Amy suggested. "Francis!"

"I'M NOT INVITING FRUGAL LUCRE!" Drakken raged. "I have invited ONLY THE BEST VILLAINS – "

"Then where's Professor Dementor?" Shego teased.

"THIN ICE, Shego," Drakken told her. "You're walking on it."

"Mmkay. Yeah, that doesn't scare me."

"I HAVE INVITED ONLY THE BEST VILLAINS WHO RESPECT THE ART OF SUPERVILLAINY," Drakken continued, "TO UNITE FOR THE GRAND PURPOSE OF – okay, is anyone else going to interrupt me?" He slumped. "I'd prefer you get it over with now."

"I was just thinkin' ye said ye'd be providin' free food," Duff piped up. "An' I've yet ta see a decent haggis."

"I promised PIZZA AND DONUTS, not HAGGIS," Drakken reminded him. "And the delivery is running several hours late for some reason. That pizza better be free after all this hassle! Anyway, is everyone done interrupting?"

A pause.

"Speak now, or forever hold your peace."

"I actually despise pizza," Monkey Fist said quickly. Then he nodded. "That will be all."

"Now, then!" Drakken continued. "We are assembled here today for a common goal: to succeed where in the past, we have failed! Our combined efforts together will result in an evil upheaval the likes of which has never been seen before on this planet! …'Evil upheaval.' Hmm. Not an intentional rhyme, but I'm keeping that to use for later."

"Gotcha covered!" Amy chirped. "Evil…" She jotted the words down on her notepad. "Upheaval!"

"Furthermore," Drakken went on, "this may very well be our only chance to finally DESTROY KIM POSSIBLE AND HER SIMPERING SIDEKICK!"

"NOW you have my interest," Monkey Fist said with a grin.

"To begin," Drakken opened, "I was originally going to present to you a rather well-thought-out scheme involving taking over Bueno Nacho at the management level, hijacking several advanced robotic toys to reprogram for evil, and diverting Kim Possible's attention with a syntho-drone designed to act as the perfect boyfriend. However, I was informed by…sources…that the robot thing is kind of something I've done a few times before…or a few hundred…and that there are unfortunate implications to assuming Kim Possible's greatest weakness will be boys. No matter what all of the hip teen mags on the shelves tell me."

"Yeah," Shego asserted, "say one more time that a woman's biggest weakness is falling for some hottie and I'm gonna rip your head off for real this time. Also, if I never hear the words 'hip teen mags' come out of your mouth again, it'll be too soon."

"So, instead," Drakken suggested, "after another painstaking twelve hours of research, I present to you our new plan!"

His free hand grasped a remote from within his pocket, clicking a button. "BEHOLD!"

Nothing happened.

Frustrated, Drakken punched the button several times in a row. "Nngh…stupid…thing…you should all be beholding by now…"

At last, the projector clicked on. "AHA! BEHOLD!" Drakken slammed the pointer into the image on the wall. "The Time Monkey! An ancient artifact that – "

"We already went AFTER the Time Monkey," Monkey Fist sighed.

"…We did?" Drakken asked. "I have no memory of this."

"Even you can't be that moronic," Monkey Fist groaned. "We launched an entire expedition to find the artifact."

"Only ta find out tha' it didn' even exist ta begin with," Duff piped in.

"Er…no," Monkey Fist argued. "We definitely found the Time Monkey."

"No, we didn'!" Duff growled. "Are ya sayin' me memory's faulty?"

"Yes. I am. Because I DISTINCTLY remember discovering the Time Monkey, body and head!"

"I really don't think we ever did this," Drakken pointed out. "Unless you two went ahead and did it without me. Why would you do something like this without me?"

"YOU WERE THERE!" Monkey Fist and Duff both barked.

"Guys!" Shego snapped. "For those of you who believe the Time Monkey existed, what exactly did you DO with it once you found it?"

"Why, we…we…" Monkey Fist faltered. "You know, now I can't remember. All I know is that we found it."

"Obviously, we tried to do something with time travel," Shego sighed, "we messed it up, and now the entire plan was ERASED FROM HISTORY."

"Awww, and whatever I came up with that involved time travel was probably such a good plan, too," Drakken mourned.

"I highly doubt it," Duff grunted.

"I guess we'll never know NOW, will we?" Monkey Fist grumbled.

"Time…Monkey…erased…from…history," Amy muttered as she jotted down her notes.

"Well, fear not," Drakken stated. "As usual, my intellect has filled in to save the day."

"In what universe is that USUAL?" Shego asked.

"Ignoring that," Drakken told her. He punched the button on the remote.

The item on the screen was now a metal cylinder. "The pan-dimensional vortex inducer!" Drakken cried.

"UUUGGGHHH," Shego groaned. "WE ALREADY TRIED TO STEAL THAT TWICE! IT DIDN'T WORK!"

"Yes, well, obviously there's a REASON we keep coming back to it, isn't there?" Drakken argued. "It's objectively the best evil device in this world there is to obtain and twist to our nefarious purposes!"

"Objectively so?" Monkey Fist sighed. "You couldn't be more wrong if you shot in the dark. The actual most useful object to us in this world is the Lotus Blade. Perhaps we should make an expedition to retrieve that sword. After all, Yamanouchi's elite cannot stand up to our combined might, can they?"

"Yer bonkers in the brain, as usual!" Duff insulted. "The best thing we could use ta do evil is the Centurion Project!"

"The what?" Drakken asked.

"Ye know!" Duff reminded him. "The thing we 'ad that big brawl over on 'alloween night! 'Twas the ultimate armor, an' Kim Possible ended up usin' it against us! Do ye seriously not remember?"

"Oh, yeeaahhhh," Shego realized. "That was a thing."

"It is starting to ring a bell," Drakken mused.

"IT SHOT LASERS AN' BEAMS!" Duff yelled. "HOW DID YE ALL COLLECTIVELY FORGET THE THING EXISTED FER OVER A YEAR?"

"We've done a lot of plans!" Drakken defended. "They start to blend together after a while! I only remember the actually UNIQUE technology I've been after! Which is why I know what we should be going for is the pan-dimensional vortex inducer!"

"Technology," Monkey Fist scoffed. "The Lotus Blade is above such base devices. Magic is the true power in this world."

"I'm not lettin' the Centurion Project go," Duff insisted. "Yer passin' up the ultimate armor!"

"Guys. GUYS." Shego put up her hands to get their attention. "Why don't we just cut to the chase? The point of all this is to end up with a lot of money, right? So let's just run a new search engine for 'extremely valuable' and 'heavily guarded' and see what comes up. We find whatever is going for the highest bid on the black market, we GET it, we SELL it, END OF PLAN."

"But that cuts out all the fun parts!" Drakken argued. "Where's the scheming? The doomsday device?"

"The taunting of our archrivals?" Monkey Fist added. "The besting of our foes on the battlefield?"

"I didn' build my entire identity aroun' golf just ta do easy little schemes that didn' involve me usin' GOLF," Duff argued.

"While you boys make some thirty-step runaround plan that requires you to build a super robot mech suit, become the new chosen one of the enchanted sword, and play around on the putting green," Shego argued, "I'll be the one getting us ACTUAL RESULTS."

"Ngh…" Drakken gritted his teeth. He hated that it had come to this, but there was one really great mediator on the team, and it was time for her to put that skill to use. "Amy…what do YOU think we should do?"

"I just want us all to get along!" Amy cried. "They're all such good plans! …Well, except for the Lotus Blade."

"Keep your bias out of this, woman," Monkey Fist seethed.

"YOU CAN GO JUMP IN THE LAKE!" Amy yelled at him.

Drakken pointed back and forth between the two of them. "Ummm…what's this?"

"Yer really outta the loop, aren't ye?" Duff sighed. "They been bitter exes for a while now."

"Exes?" Drakken repeated. "When did THAT happen?"

"When SHE," Monkey Fist explained, "devolved from a rational ally into an overly emotional simpering STALKER."

"YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!" Amy accused. "AND IT WAS WORSE TO ME THAN ANYTHING I EVER DID TO YOU! I WAS READY TO MUTATE INTO A WHOLE NEW BODY JUST TO BE WITH YOU!"

"AND AS I'VE TOLD YOU, I'M NOT READY TO AGREE TO THAT LEVEL OF COMMITMENT! I MERELY SUGGESTED WE NEEDED SPACE!"

"SPACE? THAT'S JUST MAN-CODE FOR WANTING TO BREAK UP WITH ME!"

"Greeeeeaaaaat," Shego sighed. "Now we have to deal with THIS every time we wanna get the band together."

"Shego was right!" Amy huffed, folding her arms. "Women like Kim don't need men! No plan would ever work that involved assuming she would just get obsessed over some…some JERK LIKE MONTY!"

"Amy," Drakken reminded her, "obsessing over men has literally been the core of most of your schemes. Me…Monty…that substitute teacher with the deep voice…"

"The point is, whatever HE wants is the only plan I won't do!" Amy insisted.

"All right, we need a tiebreaker," Drakken sighed. "How long left on the kid?"

"Not long," Amy related, considerably lacking in pep. "He should be in any minute now."

"Well, we need to settle on a plan!" Drakken groaned. "How is it that assembling the greatest supervillainous minds of this world hasn't already resulted in the entire world bowing to us?"

An unfamiliar voice sounded from the conference room doorway: "Maybe it's because you're thinking on small things. People of your, albeit primitive, caliber should be able to achieve more than just the world, I would think. Also, if you need someone to decide on a plan for you, I'm more than happy to cast the final vote."

"Eh?" Drakken looked to the door in confusion, as did Shego, Monty, Duff, and Amy.

Rai Xin flew into the room, McGlitch, Kiko, Zoey, Doctor O, Lixdan and a robotic beast resembling a fusion between man and lizard in tow. "Before you ask," the lizard man robot said with a demonic smile, "yes, we ran into the guards. No, they didn't give any trouble whatsoever."

"Also," Doctor O said as he held up a chocolate donut, "we ran into your delivery man en route to your hideout. I hope you do not mind that we took the liberty of stealing the pizza and donuts." He began to nibble on the donut in a rodent-like way.

"Though whichever one of you put the anchovies on their half of the pizza," Lixdan sighed, "I'm already disappointed."

"Who are YOU supposed to be?" Drakken cried in alarm.

"I dunno," Shego said with interest, "but I already like their style."

"What?" Kiko laughed. "Did you forget me so soon, Drakken?!"

"Wait a minute." Drakken ducked to look beneath the table. "You! Yumisu!"

"UGH!" Kiko groaned. "It's pronounced – "

"I said it right," Drakken told her flatly.

"He said it right," Zoey and Mechainfinite chorused.

"…Oh," Kiko realized. "Well, then." She went back to her pizza.

"I just didn't see you there, since you're so…ahem…Kim-sized," Drakken muttered as he stood to full height. "All right, what do you want now, and who are these new minions? They look like they just got here from a costume party."

"Like any of you can talk," Kiko grunted.

"I think ye can go back ta Party City where ye belong, laddie," Duff snorted.

"Is that any way to treat a guest?" Mechainfinite replied. "Let alone someone who tore apart the throats of your entire battalion."

"In my defense," Drakken sneered, "it was never an impressive battalion."

"Ooh, self-burn," Shego hissed.

"Now, if I may point out what interests me." Monty crawled up onto the table, scuttling on all fours until he was face-to-face with Doctor O. "Which would be you, as a matter of fact."

"Fisk, my good man," Doctor O practically laughed.

"You KNOW EACH – " Kiko shook her head. "Of course. Two of the most prevalent villains in this world. Of course you know each other."

"I provided him with three highly valuable jade idols of considerable magical power," Doctor O regaled. "He, in turn, paid their worth. However, when it came to the fourth and final idol, he enlisted a teenage mercenary who would work for free."

"You understand good business, do you not?" Monty challenged smugly. "I paid what we agreed upon. You were never under contract for all four jade monkeys."

"It was implied."

"Ah, ah, ah! You should've gotten it in writing."

Now Doctor O didn't really regret never telling Monty the truth about Yono, and he counted his blessings that they'd obviously intercepted him before he could've gone the Way of the Yono.

"Now, now," Kiko broke in, "water under the bridge. I say we burn that bridge and move forward. After all, this is a room filled with the greatest evil minds this world has known, isn't it? And we all want the same thing, don't we?"

"Erm…world domination?" Drakken suggested.

"Unlimited power?" Monty added.

"Free reign ta golf?" Duff asked.

"Life-sized, sentient mutant Cuddle Buddies that snuggle with you whenever you need snuggles?" Amy guessed.

"An actually competent boss?" Shego sighed.

"All of the above, and more," Kiko told them. "I represent what you might call…an enterprise. We call ourselves...Deadlight!"

"What kinda name is 'Deadlight'?" Duff chuckled. "Didja come up with that after a golf ball knocked ye in the noggin?"

"It kinda sounds like a reference," Drakken mused.

"Got it in one!" Kiko confirmed. "The reference to Stephen King, I mean. Not the golf ball. My boss assembled a horde of villains from every corner of existence to chase down dominance over our very own empire. And with power and a place to use that power, you end up reaping the little rewards. Like golf or possibly illegal mutations. Whatever the dream, consider it come true. But teamwork is what makes the dream work, and I need your team in order to realize my dream."

"Really." Drakken sighed. "You just waltz in here, possibly slaughter my ENTIRE guard, and expect me to believe you want to make FRIENDS?"

"Would you have let me in if I knocked?" Kiko asked.

"If you'd come with pizza and donuts, yes," Drakken said, deadpan. "Seeing as that's what we ordered. It's a classic villain gambit."

"I can't actually argue with that," Kiko jabbed. "But where's the flair in such a blasé con job? I understand that everyone in this room is a cut above the ordinary street thug. You aren't just villains. You're SUPERvillains."

"And you're offering us a contract to work for the man who used to be on MY payroll," Monkey Fist snorted.

"I think you'll find that challenging my role will hardly end well for you," Doctor O said, smirking.

"I dunno," Shego said. "I get good vibes off these guys. So. What're your names?"

"I am Kiko Yumisu," Kiko stated, "and my ever-loyal companions are Zoey Marrow, also known as Black Bones, Doctor Owen Possumus, Doctor O for short, Lixdan and Mechainfinite."

"Mechainfinite?" Drakken repeated. "Sounds a little pretentious, don't you think? How'd you come up with that one, anyway?"

"It's my ACTUAL name," Mechainfinite growled.

"See, that's your first mistake," Drakken told him. "You never go with your actual name. You have to pick something memorable, something that'll strike fear into your enemies' hearts. Like 'Dr. Drakken.' Or 'Shego.'"

"Or 'Duff Killigan'?" Duff broke in.

Drakken fired him a glare . "We've talked about this, Killigan."

"I'M NO' CHANGIN' MY NAME TA 'DIABOLIGOLF'!"

"Back on topic," Drakken steered, "what makes you think I'm going to work with you again? You think I'm really going to put up with someone who does nothing but prank me all day?"

"Uh, Dr. D?" Shego put up her hand. "Case in point right here."

"…Fair," Drakken relented.

"Have we not all traded friendly banter before?" Kiko posed. "We're villains. We know how this works. And believe me, you'll find SOMEONE back at base who will think you're the best friend they've ever had."

"Hmmm." Amy tapped her pen against her chin. "I don't know. Trusting someone we just met might not be the best career move. How do we know this circle of friends is gonna work out?"

"Not to AGREE with Amy," Monkey Fist spat, "but what proof do you have that you ARE cut from our cloth?"

Another new voice intruded, though five present already recognized it; "Oh, trust me. He's one of us. More specifically, he's just…like…me."

Mechainfinite turned to see who had spoken –

And flinched, unable to hide his visceral disgust.

The youth might've been human, once, Kiko determined. But right at that moment, all he shared with the human race was the build – slender, agile, two arms, two legs, a head. Beyond that, he was all fish – or maybe ninety percent fish, ten percent frog. Pure red eyes offset vibrant green skin. Webbed hands ended in sharp claws. Continuously secreting dark muck obscured the boy's body, making Mechainfinite unsure whether he was actually wearing any clothes or not.

"I don't see how I can be ANYTHING like you," Doctor O said, unnerved. "No offenses meant."

"And none taken," the boy went on. "Do you know why?"

"No, nor do I care, but you're obviously about to tell me." Mechainfinite said.

The fish-boy took two squishing steps forward, tapping one claw into Mechainfinite's chest – smiling as the robot instinctively recoiled. "Because I can see it all in your face," the fish-boy informed him. "And I hear it in the way you talk. You're the kind of person who's been capable of great things, but you got knocked over by some loser squeeb and had to spend the rest of your life making up for it. You're the kind of person who takes what he has and makes the most out of it. You're the kind of person who spent most of his life in some dark, abandoned corner of the world coming up with all the things you were gonna do to the people you hated once you got your big break, and then you followed through on it!"

The analysis actually made Mechainfinite reconsider his revulsion. His entire body relaxed, slightly. "That's…surprisingly astute. I'm guessing that's your story."

"Yeah," the fish-boy confirmed, removing his claw from Mechainfinite. "And as you can see, it ended with me sacrificing my very humanity for ultimate power! Now, I am superhuman!"

"I do know a thing or two about sacrificing for power," Mechainfinite admitted, a smirk creeping up his face under his mask. He liked the way the organic talked: confident, cold, smug. "Now, I have profiles on Drakken, Shego, Monkey Fist, Killigan, and DNAmy, but I don't seem to recognize you from the files of this world's most wanted."

"That's because I haven't had a chance to show anybody what I can REALLY do yet," the fish-boy told him. "But with DNAmy's genetic mutation keeping me green for good, that's all gonna change!"

"And is there a name to go with that mutation?"

"As a matter of fact," the fish-boy said with a smirk, "I am known as Gill. Formerly Gil."

"…Am I supposed to – "

"I ADDED AN L!" Gill cried. "IT GOES! WITH! MY MUTATION!"

"Still not as fortuitous as 'Monty Fisk' so conveniently translating into 'Monkey Fist,'" Monty muttered. "Just saying."

"Well, Gill with two Ls," Mechainfinite greeted, "you can call me Mechainfinite, Mech the Ripper works as well."

"But then again, I think," Zoey broke in with a grin, "what the Huntsman called you is the Lake Wannaweep Monster."

"Wait a minute!" Gill cried. "That uniform! I know you! Or at least, I know who you work with."

"The Lake Wannaweep Monster was a critter that terrorized the forest," Zoey growled. "A small radius of destruction, but a poignant one. My former boss, the Huntsman, sent me, his second top Huntsgirl, as well as a remedial troop of Huntsboys to get rid of the creature, hoping it would improve our skill. Only I returned."

"Oh, they were remedial, all right," Gill teased. "Most of them didn't even know how to swim. What, are you mad 'cause I drowned your fellow squeebs?"

"Truth be told, mildly annoyed at most about that particular incident," Zoey replied. "The rest of them were, after all, seriously brain dead. If you hadn't culled them, the dragons would've. The principle of the matter, however, is another beast entirely."

Kiko quickly positioned herself between Zoey and Gill, looking to the former with a gentle plea. "Now, now, babe, let's not let old grudges ruin new opportunities. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but this one's a catch."

Zoey recoiled. That couldn't mean what she thought it meant, could it?

Kiko spun back to face Gill. "She'll get over it," the sorcerer dismissed. "What matters is that I'm rather attached to you. And you actually aren't THAT repulsive."

Now Zoey was furious with Gill's existence for a completely different reason.

"Are you serious?" Gill replied. "I guess I need to work on my repulsion factor, then. I want to make people sick on sight."

"A fish after my own heart."

Zoey was watching her girlfriend chat with a cryptid and she was not happy about it in the slightest. "Can we please get to the POINT?" she snarled.

"Of course." Kiko strode to the front of the room. Once she stood beside Drakken at the table's head, she explained, "I know the idea of trusting your partnership to an alliance you barely know is probably really sussy at best. And believe me, once we tell you the whole story, you're going to be even more – "

"Some of you are from another planet," Drakken sighed, "or some other dimension."

Lixdan practically choked. "HUH?! HOW DID YOU–"

"You came with Yumisu, a literal DEMON."

"…Okay, that is true," Mechainfinite realized. "But the picture is bigger than even you realize–"

"Parallel universe theory dictates infinite possibilities," Drakken said casually. "You're about to tell us that you're from some kind of…planet inhabited solely by robots."

"CAN YOU PLEASE FUCKING STOP?" Kiko snapped.

"Actually," Doctor O commented, "Dr. Drakken's keen head will serve us quite well in the long run."

"THANK YOU!" Drakken cried, gesturing to Doctor O with both hands. "DID YOU SEE THAT? THAT'S CALLED A 'COMPLIMENT'! YOU ALL NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DO IT! Except Amy. She does it too much."

"Aww, you're too sweet," Amy cooed.

"Case in point," Drakken seethed.

"I do see a potential benefit to this alliance," Monkey Fist pointed out. "After all, Doctor O does spectacular work, even if none of it's gratis."

"And the little mouse girl is just so cuuuuuuute!" Amy squealed.

"I am not CUTE!" Lixdan argued. "I'M... Wait a sec, you really do think I am cute?"

"I've known Mechainfinite for about five minutes now," Shego pointed out, "and I don't hate him. That's saying something."

"I guess this makes as much sense as anythin' else ever does," Duff relented.

"All the same," Kiko went on, "to get us all on the same page, I'd like to propose a little heist. Think of it as a team bonding activity."

She held out her right hand, an illusion image glimmering into view atop its palm. "First up, the pan-dimensional vortex inducer," she stated. "To make a very long story short, my boss needs to be able to tear several large holes in the fabric of space-time. Help me get the vortex inducer, and you'll be able to reap all associated benefits of said ruptures. Next up…"

The image changed to a floating katana, rotating slowly over her hand. "The Lotus Blade, currently guarded by Yamanouchi Academy of ninjas. Known for its ability to shapeshift into any weapon and slice through almost any material. With that sword in our hands, we'll be almost unstoppable. Note the 'almost.' It's not a one-hundred-percent guarantee. If you want THAT, well, then you'd have to talk about this…"

Now the image was of a small silver bracelet. "The Centurion Project," Kiko went on. "An unassuming trinket to the naked eye, but Dr. O has assured me that it's literally the greatest trick you can have up your sleeve. It uses a stress-activated system to transform into an indestructible suit of armor with multiple weaponry functions."

She closed her fist, dismissing the image in a puff of blue smoke. "As for part four," she concluded, "once we're properly armed and ready with the Lotus Blade and the Centurion Project, we head to Sync City, and search for the Black Soulstone shards, use said shards to raid anything heavily guarded and of value in this realm, and pawn them off to Zoey's former boss's clients in the magical black market, where both magical and nonmagical items are appreciated." She looked out over the conference room. "Any questions?"

"No," Drakken said tentatively, "not a question, per se…it's just that…"

Kiko turned to him and raised a brow. "It's just that what?"

"It's just that those are the exact things we were talking about stealing before you came in," Drakken informed her. "We just couldn't decide which one."

Mechainfinite was frozen into unresponsiveness.

"Truth is stranger than fiction," Monkey Fist confirmed.

"…Well then." Kiko said. "We'll need you to work with the Shadow Hunters to grab the vortex inducer, the Lotus Blade, and the Centurion Project. After that, head to Sync City, then once we get the Soulstone shards, we head to the first valuable you intend to sell off and make an offer the owner can't refuse."

"That way, EVERYONE gets to be happy!" Amy cried. Then, upon realization: "Even MONTY. Oh, rats."

"LET IT GO, WOMAN!" Monkey Fist yelled.

"It only goes to show that great minds think alike," Drakken stated. "We will mobilize at once! And, er, don't put DNAmy and Monkey Fist on the same team. Or DNAmy and me, for that matter."

"All in favor of the plan?" Kiko asked.

"Eh, why not?" Shego replied.

"Like I said," Duff asserted, "as much sense as anythin'."

"I'm in," Gill stated.

"Oh, you KNOW I'm there, cutiepie!" Amy chirped.

"Only Zoey gets to call me that," Kiko told her.

"Then it is unanimous!" Monkey Fist stood to full height on the table. "Our crime syndicate shall raze the very world, harvesting its most powerful aspects for ourselves! We shall unite with forces from beyond our plane! WE SHALL BE – "

A chime sounded from the phone in his pocket. "Forgive me," he said, interrupting himself to sit in a lotus position on the tabletop. "It is time to center."

He closed his eyes, oblivious to the world.

After a long pause, Kiko asked, "Is he…?"

"Going to be meditating for about ten minutes?" Drakken sighed. "Yes."

He'd produced a small paperback booklet, sitting down at the table. "I can tear out a sudoku puzzle for you if you want," he offered, setting to work filling in numbers on grids.

The others had all settled in to wait out Monty's meditation. Shego was flipping through a book of her own, calling out to Mechainfinite, "Hey, newbie! What's your star sign? I'm gonna figure out your Animology."

Mechainfinite was frozen into unresponsiveness.

Amy was lost in a romance novel, sighing at the steamy chapter. Gill craned over her shoulder to see what she was reading, and Amy instinctively smacked the book into his face. "Young MAN! You're not old enough to be reading this kind of book!"

"I'm eighteen," Gill argued, "you're NOT my mom, and I KNOW how–" He paused, screwing up his face at what he'd just read. "Is that even physically possible?"

Mechainfinite looked around at everyone, then to Kiko, Zoey, Lixdan, and Doctor O. "It's…"

"Absolute chaos," Zoey sniffed. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

"It's just like back home," Doctor O filled in, and this was what he was looking for.

Kiko slumped into a chair, leaning over the table and grumbling, "Screw it, Dr. D, gimme a sudoku."

---

Crunch Bar groggily opened her eyes as she woke up from that...nightmare... She was vaguely aware of soreness where her limbs attached to her body. Crust had gathered in the corners of her eyes while she was awake. She brought her hand up to her eyes to rub the sand out of her eyes. She dusted her fingers off absently, sat up, and then set her other hand down to grasp the metal railing of the bed, and the metal was cold to the touch.

Crunch Bar immediately removed her hand from the railing and held her hands out in front of her. She gasped when she saw them. They looked almost... cybernetic, like someone stole her hands and gave her robotic ones, and when she touched her hands to one another, she could feel the sensation of skin touching skin. And when she glanced down at her right foot and stomped it around, she found that it was the same, as she looked into the mirror, seeing moth wings that looked real.

"I must say, I was not expecting we would be returning this soon." spoke a man as he walked into the room, his refined English accent echoing through the room. He appeared to be in his fifties as his black hair was greying along the sides, though for someone his age, his skin was quite evenly tanned. He also had a big bushy mustache sitting on his upper lip, matching the color of his hair. He wore a fancy grey overcoat, lined with golden accents, matching his grey dress pants. A crimson vest and yellow dress shirt underneath his coat completed his overall outfit, with fingerless gloves to match. "I do hope that our Lady has good news."

"Perhaps, doctor. But I know you've heard the reports." A gruff voice replied as its owner also went into the room. His skin was also tan, though his was its natural pigment. In contrast to the rather slim doctor, this man was built like an ox, strong and powerful. He had dark brown hair with mutton chops that extended down to his beard. He wore a black shirt beneath an olive-green coat, with black pants and brown boots to match. He wore a large belt around his waist, going over his coat. "By all accounts, the Grimm have fled from Scholarville."

Dr Arthur Watts nodded, letting out a sigh as the ship left. "I am well aware of that, Hazel, however our mistress would not summon us back early if it was not important. While the news indicates that Cinder may indeed have failed, which I would not be surprised by, there could still have been some sort of positive outcome for us in all of this chaos."

Hazel Rainart crossed his big, hairy arms, giving a grumble in response. "Hmph, we'll see." The two men made their way into the dark castle, both ambitiously prepared for what their mistress had called them here for. They strolled through the halls before arriving at the meeting room, a purple glow from beneath the door indicating that someone was already inside. Hazel pushed the door open, revealing the occupants inside. Salem, Kiko, Zoey, Doctor O, Lixdan and McGlitch, along with the Shadow Hunters, were all seated at the table, watching the men as they entered. The two bowed to their mistress, with Hazel being first to speak. "Lady Salem, we have arrived as per your request. We are humbled by your presence."

"Gentlemen, welcome." Salem rose from her seat and circled around the table to meet them, with the three others doing the same. "I am sure that you two are wondering why you have been brought here on such short notice."

"Indeed." Watts said as he raised his head to meet her dark gaze. "I was curious why you pulled me out of Mistral so suddenly, especially considering I was in a meeting with Lionheart when you called."

Salem nodded. "Hmm, and what new information has our friend gathered at Haven?"

"Some unfortunate news, I fear." Watts answered as he twiddled the end of his mustache. "Ever since the attack on Beacon happened and our world shattered into other realms, security around ALL of the Academies has been substantially increased. They are not taking any chances." He shot a glance at Cinder. "No doubt they are all frightened by the attempt to destroy Beacon last week." He raised an eyebrow. "Please, if I may, tell me we accomplished something from that little siege, besides crippling Vale?"

Cinder narrowed her eyes as Watts continued to be subtly rude to her. "We have." Her eyes began to glow and she became engulfed in a glowing red and gold aura, causing Watts' eyes to widen as he took a step back. Cinder raised her head in pride and casually put her hands behind her back, staring at Watts in an intimidating gaze. "I have become the Fall Maiden, doctor. I would certainly call that a victory, wouldn't you?"

Watts composed himself and coughed into his fist, doing his best to still be nice and condescending as she demonstrated her power. "Hmm, well, yes I see. Good on you, Cinder, so if I may ask, where is the Relic then?"

Cinder's glare hardened as the doctor brought up the one thing she hadn't acquired from the academy, and her display of power disappeared. Her voice was quiet, in an attempt to hide her shame. "I… I didn't get it."

Watts put a hand up to his ear. "I apologize, I couldn't quite make that out."

"I SAID I DIDN'T GET IT!" The floor behind Cinder burst into flames, coming and going as quick as her outburst. Fortunately, the flames were enough to surprise Watts and knock him down onto his rear, giving Cinder some satisfaction as she continued screaming at him. "I was bested by a boy with dragon powers! Some, might I add, which allow him to TRANSFORM into any monster that he wishes! Is THAT a good enough excuse for you?!"

Watts sat on the ground and took Cinder's verbal onslaught, though at the mention of the dragon boy, he became quite confused. "I-I… wait… what did you say?"

Hazel was also lost on what Cinder had said. "Yes, I must agree. It all sounds like utter nonsense."

Before Cinder could continue belting out her frustration, Kiko put a hand on her shoulder, a single gaze between the two being enough to bring the Fall Maiden down from her rage fueled high. Kiko took her hand away and stepped forward, answering Hazel's inquiry. "Cinder ain't lying, here's proof of what she fought." With a snap of her fingers, ice began rising from the floor. In the ice, an image of the X-Squad appeared. "This is the X-Squad, Blackheart's attack dogs." Another image appeared in the ice, of four robots. "Others have arrived as well, the Decepticons."

Watts stared at the images of the people in question as he stood up, now even more confused than ever. "Ahem, I mean no offense when I say this, young lady, but all of this seems rather… preposterous."

Salem nodded. "Indeed, that is what I once thought, but look closer. The images that I am about to show you do not lie." The smoke shifted and in it came the images of multiple different unknown life forms, ranging from slimy to creepy, others fast and strong, all different sorts of shapes and sizes. "The Hydrax boy has eaten something known as the Ryu-Ryu Fruit: Model: Indominus, which as Cinder explained, allows him to change into anything he wishes."

Hazel approached one of the images, one showing Krell, Tamson, Evolt and Peepers. "These are what aliens look like? I always imagined that they would be little green men with giant heads and multiple eyes."

"Perhaps in fiction, but I assure you that aliens are quite real." Doctor O made the alien images dissipate before the smoke reconstituted an image of Taisho. "What's more, it has come to my master's attention that some wield the ability to control mana. Their magical abilities intrigue me, and Salem as well."

Watts' eyes widened. "Well, I should say so! She's the only one in my world who can use real magic. How in blazes is a young upstart like this literal demoness able to wield such power?!"

Salem focused her gaze on Watts, though it turned into a glare the moment his eyes made contact. "You would do well to remember, Doctor Watts, that young Cinder is very much the same with her Maiden powers. I do not find your malignance against her necessary."

Watts made an audible gulp before bowing to the witch. "I apologize, Lady Salem, I am simply not particularly fond of—"

"Failure?" Salem finished. "And in what area did you think young Cinder failed exactly? She has gained the Fall Maiden powers, dealt a crippling blow to Beacon and Vale itself, and most important of all, killed our dear Professor Ozpin."

Hazel's eyes shot up to Cinder instantly. "Is this true? Is Ozpin dead?"

Cinder gave a confirming nod. "Yes, I saw life leave his eyes as I dealt the final blow by my own hand."

"Hmm." Hazel mumbled. "I see, very good. That wretched man finally got what he deserved for what he has done." He turned to Dr. Watts, assured of what he has heard. "I agree with Lady Salem, doctor, it would seem that Cinder has indeed succeeded. We will simply have to retrieve the Relic some other way."

The evidence presented to Watts WAS very convincing, but there was still one point of contingency that he had to bring up. "W-well then, what about the White Fang? With Adam Taurus literally erased from history, we are without solid numbers. And with the presence of this boy with an army strapped to his wrist and leading a battalion of misfit soldiers, we will need them going forward in our operations."

A sinister smile came to Salem's lips. "True, however, I believe you will find I have found a most suitable replacement. Or, to be more accurate, multiple replacements. For you see, when the X-Squad came to our attention, McGlitch has a veritable legion more of monsters, and has recruited more to our cause. With that said…" Salem raised her voice slightly. "You all may enter!"

The doors to the room opened once again, Dr. Watts and Hazel both moved around simultaneously as they creaked open. From the hallway billowed out black and blue smoke, and out stepped a giant robotic lizard, a walking fraction, a coyote, a girl with blonde hair, a blue-skinned woman clad in a princess dress, a Deinosuchus and Ichthyornis, a man clad in purple and white, a red-haired woman with coal black skin, a man with a modern TV for a head, a moth monster dressed like a pimp, and a man with white hair and green skin in a darker green lab coat. Watts was taken quite aback by the presence of these people. "Who in the world are these… these ruffians?!"

"They are the new recruits that I just told you about." Salem answered as she stepped in between the two groups. "Dr. Watts, Hazel, I would like you to meet Mechagodzilla, Wile E. Coyote, 2/3, Dil, Ichy, Polly Sparks, Malicia, King Magnifico, Velvette, Vox, Valentino and Dr. Animo. I am quite certain that you will find them qualified for our future endeavors."

"Your excellency! Your majesty!" Magnifico said with a dramatic bow towards Kiko and McGlitch, and the center of the chair was still enveloped in black and blue smoke. "So good to see you both today and looking so gorgeous too! I am honored to be in the presence of such lovely and powerful folk."

"Flattery will get you nowhere with me," Kiko warned.

"Although, flattery may get you somewhere with me," McGlitch quickly added with a chuckle.

"Of course, I understand completely," Magnifico said. "I apologize if I caused you any offense."

"Don't worry, you didn't do that," Kiko stated. "Megafin spoke highly of you, and now you wanna join Deadlight?"

"That is my wish," Magnifico said cheekily. "If you'll have me."

"And we will," McGlitch replied, "that is, if you prove yourself on this."

"Fucking finally..." Something in the smoke growled, as a bottle of chardonnay was tossed out of the smoke. "Cytten, I need another drink."

The clown robot next to the smoke mist nodded as it quickly sped off and came back with a bottle of liquid energon.

"Can you believe what the dragon prince did?" The voice asked. "THAT DAMN WHORE!" The drink was flung at 2/3, who quickly leapt away from the drink, which hit the door, and then shattered on the floor.

"Ah! It's trying to eat me!" Ichy said as he ran away from a magically mutated draconic wolf. Dil was slamming her tail on the head of the wolf-dragon but no success, and Polly, Wile and Malicia were clinging to a pillar as several of the dragon wolves were barking at the bottom.

"Oh, I forgot about this one." Kiko said. Se couldn't be blamed, it was one of many defenses her aunt made when she first got ownership of the Yamimech long ago. She lazily waved her hands, and the dragon wolves sat down, acting more like puppies.

"What is this fluffy sharptooth…" Ichy said, confused as the dragon wolf was currently licking his face.

"Anyways, which one are we talking about this time?" McGlitch said.

What flew out of the smoke was Rai Xin. "Drakus fucking Hydrax!" The demon yelled. 'Who the hell else would I be talking about?! That lizard thot beat us three times!" Rai Xin ranted. "HE DEFIED OUR WILL! We got fucking screwed over by an insignificant gecko!" Magnifico backed up a bit, shocked at this demonic beast acting like an ill-tempered child.

"Oh, he dropkicked you into next week?" Vox remarked.

"NO! He didn't dropkick me! It's worse!" Rai Xin took Vox's phone. "He beat THREE of our clients!" He then tossed Vox's phone to the wall, making it shatter in half.

"Asshole." Vox muttered.

"He thinks he can just waltz in, and tear my clients to ribbons? Can you FUCKING believe that?!" Rai Xin flew towards a closet. "He thinks he can run off and shack up with Mephisto's bastard of a son!"

"Hydrax is... living with Mephisto's kid?" McGlitch asked.

"YEAH! That bitch Blackheart or Blayke, or something like that, he's got some saloon and—" As he ranted, he opened a treasure chest full of guns, drugs, and pictures, including a poster of himself. Rai Xin pulled out two long pistol guns: a long revolver and a semi-pistol. "Which of these makes me look more frightening?" The demon asked in a calmer tone.

"Okay, those look cool and all...but why are my arms gone?!" Crunch Bar snapped.

"Impressed with my handy work?" Watts asked. "You should be."

Crunch Bar glanced up to see Watts sipping on a cup of tea (Earl Gray by the smell of it). He was looking smug and confident as if this moment was everything he'd hoped it would be.

"What... how?" Crunch Bar asked. "Are these... real?"

"Real? Of course," Watts answered as he set the cup of tea down on the counter. "They're the latest in cybernetic technology, complete with a neural interface that replicates the sensation of touch. Yet unlike flimsy flesh, it's durable and stronger than even Ironwood's antiques."

"Incredible..." Crunch Bar muttered.

"Naturally," Watts agreed. "I designed them, after all."

"And the wings?" Crunch Bar said, her wings flapping as she flew up.

"I am glad you asked about my additions to your body." Animo said as he stepped forward and extended a gloved hand. "I am Doctor Aloysius Animo, evolutionary genius. I specialize in the field of genetic mutations, a skill which your boss has humbly requested of me to contribute to his cause."

"Okay, and I didn't get the mustache guy's name either." Crunch Bar said.

Watts' eyebrows rose in surprise. "Hmm, well then." He extended his hand and shook Crunch Bar's. "Doctor Arthur Watts, a pleasure. I specialize in robotics and engineering myself."

"Indeed. Lady Salem has informed me of his feats in the realm of machines." Animo's wicked grin grew. "That being said, Doctor O, could you possibly assist me with an experiment that I have been working on?"

Doctor O put a hand to his chin in contemplation. "Hmm, really?" After a moment's thought, he put his hands behind his back and gave a nod. "Very well, Doctor Animo, it would be my pleasure. You have certainly made a good first impression, so I am willing to listen, Doctor Watts, you shall come too. Please, show me what you have in mind that the Monster Department will want to know."

"Ummmm, boss...the Demon Sorcerers are with the X-Squad as well." Kronos added.

Upon hearing those words, fire coursed through the pterodactyl's head, and he scratched the table so hard it left scratch marks. The pterodactyl made small ominous chuckles before turning to Kronos, two red lines appear on the left side of his lower lip.

"What did you just say?" The pterodactyl asked.

"You heard him as well as I did. Some Demon Sorcerers are with the X-Squad." Vox added.

"My siblings..." Rai Xin flew to him. "came back...and they're with Hydrax, and that wasn't the actual," the pterodactyl grabbed him by the collar, his voice turning more demonic. "FIRST FUCKING THING YOU TOLD ME?!"

Vox tried to get himself free from the demonic pterodactyl's grip.

"Hey! I thought they were gone for good too!"

"It's been seven thousand millennia!"

Kiko leaned up to him and pinched his cheek, Rai Xin seeming too pissed to care.

"You still salty that they left you in the dust?"

"Uh, fuck you!" Rai Xin growled at her.

"Just saying." Kiko backed away.

"Things have changed since they were locked up!" Rai Xin ranted.

"That's for sure." Kiko snarked.

"I must send a message to them, show them that I, the Demon Sorcerer of Sound, am in charge of things now!" he then said.

A large red draconic demon with horns on his head clad in black monk pants and cyan prayer beads for a belt looked up at Rai Xin.

"You are quite the mighty conqueror, or so my master says."

"Yes, yes I am. I conquered multiple realms, didn't I? And with your help, we won't only rule the omniverse, but also finally be rid of that fucking brat, Hydrax!"

After Rai Xin sat back on his throne, the red monster, whose name is Zavok, said to the other six draconic demons.

"Captain Metal's newest herald wants the half-wyvern destroyed."

"Yeah, well I feel like destroying something!" a pink draconic demon said in excitement.

"That's what I like about you, Zazz. Always ready for a fight, even before you know what you're fighting." Captain Metal laughed.

"You bet! Bring it on and I'll rip it into chunks!" Zazz laughed, before heading out the door to take on the X-Squad.

"Win or lose, we'll learn something about the new enemy." Zavok said to himself.

---

Blackheart walked forwards, one agent trying to stop him, only for the demon to grab his hand and twist it before it shattered, making him gasp, before Blackheart elbowed him down. Two more charged him with taser rods but Blackheart grabbed one's hand, making him tase the other out, then spun and elbowed his face, knocking him out as well while snatching the taser from him.

As he walked further, one more tried to pull out his gun, but Blackheart slid on the ground on his knees while holding the taser to his front, managing to touch the agent and tase him out as well.

He threw the taser down, marching to the last one, who was scared as he tried to pull out a small taser, only for Blackheart to grab his hand, then punch him so hard he broke through the door, falling right at the feet of Amanda Waller.

The other agents aimed their guns at Blackheart, but the demon and the bitch only had their eyes on each other.

"Blackheart, you're looking well, for a declawed puppy dog."

"Waller, and here I was hoping you were still crushed under that house in Munchkinland."

"Good to know you maintained that juvenile wit."

"And how pleasant it is to know you're not hunting down and skinning puppies for a fur coat. At least, not today."

"I've been busy."

"Doubt that, you can't scratch your ass without threatening someone to do it for you. Would have thought your sociopathic ass would be stuck in that chair by this point. What's your secret? Bulimia?"

"God, I forgot how annoying you could be."

"Isn't it risky for you to use His name?" Blackheart said, before snapping open a portal to a very dingy bathroom and dropkicking Waller through, as Blackheart slammed the door shut as Waller screamed in rage, as the portal dissipated, as everyone looked on in shock.

"Blackheart," the son of Mephisto turned to Johnny Blaze himself walking up to him. "I know this is hard-"

"Hard is an understatement."

"But please, don't do it for her. Do it for me. You are the only one who can lead a Squad this big, and the mission, it's a very important one."

Blackheart looked at Ghost Rider intensely. "Are you sure about this?"

"I am."

Blackheart looked at him for a few more seconds, then sighed. "What is it?"

The agents lowered their weapons, while one gestured to a screen. "Sync City, West Virginia. I take it you know the place."

"Yes, I know about it, get to the point!" Blackheart said, making the Ghost Rider roll his eyes.

"Well, we got reports that something, or someone, is making a mist that's breaching the barrier between the Yokai world and the human world," Ghost Rider revealed, the shock and horror on Blackheart's face making it clear what he thought about that. "Satellite, thermal imaging, nothing worked to find the person doing it."

"And you want the X-Squad to go there and stop it," Blackheart realized, Blaze nodding.

"I know this X-Squad of yours will do what they have to, but they gotta make sure this mist doesn't get outside Sync City's borders, or we might get a situation worse than The Siege of Starling City."

The True Death.

That's what they called it. No healing, no regeneration, no new form, just death. It was supposed to be the end of any existence whatsoever. So why the Hell was he still conscious? Eric Northman drove the stake through his heart, and he exploded to the final words of "Well fuck." That was supposed to be the end. Yet this was the "true death" and he still had his wits about him. He was still Russell Edgington... An all bluish-gray and translucent version of Russell Edgington, perhaps, but he was Russell Edgington all the same.

If Russell still had some semblance of himself, then he figured so too must the other vampires who'd met the true death, including his beloved Talbot. To get his Talbot back, Russell would move heaven and earth alike. It wasn't hard to start a little rabble rousing. Ghosts were some needy folks, and a few well spoken words were all that was needed to get them to unionize under Russell's leadership. It helped that he retained enough of his vampiric strength necessary to punch out a few furies.

Russell had no idea if such a display of disobedience would get him what he wanted, but he had nothing more to lose. If there was even a chance his little stunt got him Talbot back, then it was all worth it. Thanks to his ghostly new entourage, Russell took over the Underworld's welcome center to act as his base of operations.

"Mr. Edgington," one of the ghosts said, tapping him on the shoulder. "There's someone to see you."

Russell exited the building with his two guards flanking him and came face to face with Blackheart.

"And here I was hopin' to get a little face to face with Hades," Russell said.

"He's not in at the moment, which is lucky for you," Blackheart replied. "He doesn't exactly have a winning temperament."

"Well, I'm not lookin' for some low man on the totem pole," Russell said. "I need somebody who can get me my Talbot back and send us along on our merry little way."

"You're not exactly in a bargaining position," Blackheart said, snapping his fingers, as a tendril of water emerged from the River Styx. The tendril snaked around Russell and scooped up the two ghostly guards flanking him. Russell looked on in mild disgust as they were dragged down into the Styx.

"That's what happens to ghosts who annoy me," Blackheart clarified, while blowing on his nails for effect. "Lucky for you, I just so happen to have a certain soft spot for people like you, especially ones talented enough to stir up a little trouble."

Russell sneered. "And just what exactly are you sayin'?"

"I can restore you to flesh and blood," Blackheart explained, "give you another shot at unnatural life. But that's only on the table if you agree to join a little get-together I'm putting together."

Blackheart punctuated his offer with a chuckle.

"What kind of get-together are we talkin' about?" Russell asked, raising an eyebrow.

"The kind that would literally fight gods to save the world, all while being sanctioned by me," Blackheart answered with a laugh.

"I admit myself intrigued," Russell answered. "But I have goals of my own that I'd like to pursue. Will everyone's desires be accommodated?"

"Oh yes!" Blackheart replied. "You're gonna be able to make the whole universe shake! Here."

Blackheart waved his hand, and a Corridor of Darkness took form.

"Let's talk more about it at Sinner's Lane."

---

"Flag." Blackheart said, seeing Rick Flag enter Sinner's Lane.

"Hartford." Rick said, standing in front of him.

"I called you here to discuss the Task Force X reactivation." Blackheart said, as he took a drink from a mug of hot milk.

"You want me to be a part of it?" Rick asked.

"Lead it, make sure the selection doesn't tear each other apart. You led Task Force X many times, so I feel you're fit best to the mission." Blackheart said, as he slid the folder forward.

Rick picked it up, and opened it up, reading it.

"Sync City? You're sending Task Force X to West Virginia, to handle some blizzard problem?"

"One making Yokai walk among humans, Flag, this team took down Amora, a bigger threat than even Argrenious." Blackheart said, as he stood up and walked down Sinner's Lane, Rick closed the folder and followed him.

Blackheart stopped, as Rick looked at who he wanted him to see, a blue-skinned man in western garb in a jail cell.

Cad Bane's eyes slowly opened as he was roused from his slumber by the banging on his door. As he slowly came to and regained his vision, he became aware of his surroundings, glancing up at the dirty walls and harsh lights of the cramped cell he had found himself in. As the banging continued, Bane rose from the hard bench he had been sleeping on, and looked over to see a face looking in through the slot in his cell door.

"Hey, Caddy, visitor's here."

Muttering a curse under his breath, Bane rose to his feet as he had been ordered. As he rubbed the sleep from his eyes, he contemplated the unlucky series of events that had led to him, one of the most feared bounty hunters in the galaxy, becoming merely yet another prisoner on Earth; locked up in the hellhole they called Sinner's Lane.

It had started out so simple: another run-of-the-mill assassination job. His target had been some high profile Earth businessman. Bounties on Earth were rare and fairly risky, but nothing too difficult for someone of his caliber. And yet, something had gone wrong. Most likely someone had sold him out. In any case, he'd been intercepted by the government agency known as the Men In Black, and although he'd put up a hell of a fight, he'd eventually been subdued and detained, before being dumped here in Belle Reve, which soon merged with Sinner's Lane.

That had been a week ago, and already he'd come to see firsthand why this place had such a good reputation among everyone, even criminals. Even for someone like himself, who had been in and out of more prisons than he could count, this place ranked low among them in his book. Yet, one question had been on his mind throughout his days in Sinner's Lane: the question of why exactly he was there. From what he knew of this place, it was typically a cafe, a place where people could relax and have a drink or even dinner. So why was he kept here?

On cue, his cell door opened, and his visitor stepped inside, an expression of cheekiness on his face. "Cad Bane. How the mighty have fallen."

Bane's eyes narrowed as he looked at the demon standing in the doorway. Although he hadn't been here long, this man's reputation preceded him.

"Blackheart," Bane growled, the distaste in his voice evident. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"So you've heard of me," Blackheart observed, smirking. "Well now, that can make things easier." Blackheart stepped forward, meeting Bane's cold glare with a smile full of mirth. "I'm here to offer you a deal. I'm putting together a team of sorts. There's jobs I need done, and I could use someone with your set of skills."

Bane cocked his brow, his curiosity piqued. "And what sort of job would that be?" he inquired, taking a step towards Blackheart. Although the bounty hunter towered over him, the son of Mephisto was unwavering.

"A little operation, strictly need-to-know," Blackheart explained. "You'll be working alongside your fellow convicts to carry out a mission of importance on behalf of myself and the OVDF. Should you and your teammates succeed, I'll see to it that you'll be accommodated as a part of the X-Squad. If you fail, well, I know a guy that can get you back to life."

Cad Bane gave a dry laugh. "Ah, so that's why you've brought me here. To do your dirty work," the bounty hunter observed. "So why me?"

"From what I hear, you're one of the best at what you do," Blackheart replied, "and you have myriad experience at leading high stakes jobs like this one. In short, your skills and expertise are exactly what I need for this operation."

Bane rubbed his chin, thinking the offer was over for a moment, before turning back to Blackheart. "And what if I'm not interested?" he asked with a smirk.

Blackheart returned his smirk. "I'm sure you know, you've pissed off quite a few galactic governments throughout your illustrious career, Bane. There are quite a few other prisons that would be eager to take you off my hands. If you're not going to be useful to me, then perhaps Kyln would be happy to have you." A devious smile spread across Blackheart's face.

Bane's blood froze at the mention of the legendary prison. The Kyln was well known throughout the universe for having possibly the highest mortality rate of any prison, and for being utterly inescapable. For those unfortunate enough to end up there, the only way to leave was by dying, which most tended to within about three years, often less. Imprisonment in the Kyln was practically a death sentence.

"You're bluffing," Bane snarled.

"Try me," Blackheart replied, his grin never wavering.

Bane clenched his fists and growled in rage, but Blackheart was unfaltering as ever. "So, Cad Bane," he continued, "You in?"

The bounty hunter considered his options. If he moved quickly, he could simply snap Blackheart's neck and be done with it, but then again, the demon would likely shoot him dead before he could even leave his cell. He could attempt to take him hostage, but even if he did manage to leave the prison alive, he'd have the OVDF hunting him down, and with no weapons, resources, or any means of leaving the place, he doubted he'd get far. His prospects were limited at the moment, and loathed as he was to accept a probable suicide mission, he had little choice. He had a better chance surviving whatever mission Blackheart had planned than he would if he followed through on the threat to transfer him to the Kyln.

"Alright," Bane replied, forcing himself to put on a confident smile. "You've got a deal. I'll join your little suicide squad."

"Great! First thing I should mention, though... I was partially bluffing about dragging you to Kyln. Sorry for the lie, but I had to make sure you took this seriously."

"Wait, so...that meant..." Cad Bane sputtered, realizing he got played for a fool and signed up for what's essentially a death mission.

"Alrighty, let's get the rest!" Blackheart said, clapping his hands together as Bane and Flag followed him to a man sitting at a table, drinking a latte.

"Big guy's Robert DuBois. A world-class marksman. In his hands, anything is a deadly weapon. Dear old dad was a mercenary who trained his son to kill from the moment he was born. He's in here for landing Superman in the ICU with a kryptonite bullet.…Bloody Sportsy?"

DuBois looked up at the trio, before going back to his drink.

"I told Waller before, I'm not joining this goddamn Suicide Squad." He said

"What about your daughter, DuBois? She got arrested and may be put in the hoosegow if they find her crime too big to give a light sentence." Blackheart asked, making him turn back to the demon.

Rick, Bane and Russell glanced at Blackheart as DuBois got up.

"You threatening my daughter?" He asked.

"Your file says you don't care for her, why would it matter now?" Blackheart asked.

DuBois stopped at this, only glaring as he was thinking.

"Do this mission, and I promise you that your daughter will go free from any trouble she's caused." Blackheart said.

Rick saw DuBois shake his head gently as he didn't seem happy at this.

"You have the military experience necessary, and everything in your psychological profile tells me you have what it takes to be a leader." Blackheart said

"No, I'm no fucking leader!" DuBois said

"Then I'll make you one." Blackheart said as he walked to another part of the saloon.

DuBois glanced at Rick before following Blackheart, something Rick did too.

"This guy's Floyd Lawton, grew up with a messed-up family. His dad was shit towards his mother, and dear mommy convinced his older brother, Ed, into shooting him for her. Floyd here wanted to save his brother from getting blood on his hands, so he took a rifle up a tree and tried to shoot his father first. However, the branch broke, and he shot his dear old brother instead." Blackheart said. "Hey, Deads?"

Lawton looked up at the two, before going back to his mocha.

"Deadshot." Rick nodded at Lawton, this guy added a little bit of a familiar face to the team.

"Flag." He said, a smile on his face.

"You gonna act out this time?" Rick asked, more joking than anything.

Deadshot held his hands up gently.

"I ain't gonna risk that again, I do as I'm told, I lose prison time, better than dying." He said.

"As another incentive, there's your daughter, Lawton? She recently got arrested and may go to prison if they find her crime too big to give a light sentence." Blackheart said, making him turn to the demon.

Rick glanced at Blackheart as Lawton got up.

"You threatening my daughter?" He asked.

"Exactly, what's the matter?" Blackheart asked.

Lawton stopped at this, only glaring at the demon. "Am I a bad man? Yes! I admit that! But I'm also a family one. And you should know that family is always important!"

"Join the X-Squad on this, and I promise you, your kid will go free from any trouble she's caused with the law." Blackheart said.

Rick saw Lawton shake his head gently, as he didn't seem happy at this.

Lawton glanced at Rick and DuBois before following Blackheart, something Rick did too.

"Each member of the team is chosen for his or her own completely unique set of abilities, even those that basically do what Deadshot and Bloodsport do, but since Peacemaker ain't here on account of me tossing him deep into Tartarus, we gotta be creative. This guy's George Harkness, goes by Captain Boomerang, world-renowned thief. As a kid, he learned how to craft top-tier boomerangs and even developed them into weapons. Three lifelong sentences, and an original member of Task Force X."

"You got a guy who uses boomerangs?" DuBois asked.

"His boomerangs can be as deadly as your weapons, long range, and can be useful if you're surrounded and need to take down people while in cover, he can be deadly. For your mission, it's most important that you have every field triple covered." Blackheart said.

"Boomerang." Rick nodded at Boomerang, Boomerang added a little bit of a familiar face to the team.

"Flag." He said, a familiar smug smile on his face.

"You gonna act out this time?" Rick asked, more joking than anything.

Boomerang held his hands up gently.

"I ain't gonna risk that again, I do as I'm told, I lose prison time, better than dying." He said.

Rick nodded a little, Boomerang understood now, first time, he was out for himself, now he's more of a team player for a benefit, but Deadshot followed well when he was doing that.

"Next up is Nanaue Sha'ark." Blackheart said, walking them into another part of the saloon, and the four saw a giant shark reading a book upside down.

"Holy shit." Lawton said, backing up a little.

"What the fuck?" DuBois said.

"Oi, He's like that Jones fella, wasn't he a Crocodile?" Harkness asked.

Rick almost chuckled at this, he did have a point about Jones.

But Jones was smarter than Nanaue, but not as strong, and was more cold blooded.

"Some people claim that this big boy is a descendant of an ancient shark god. Whatever the case, he's strong and deadly." Blackheart said, walking past Nanaue who started following them with a kind of waddle.

"Does it talk?" Lawton asked, glancing back at Nanaue before looking back at Blackheart, who shrugged.

"Book read." Nanaue said, showing Harkness his book.

"Wow." DuBois chuckled gently

"The book's upside-down." Lawton whispered to Rick.

"He's more brawn than brain, just ignore it." Rick said, knowing King Shark will be great on the field.

"See that? It's pretending to read a book." Harkness laughed

"So smart, me. Enjoy book so much." Nanaue said

"Be a little careful, as he may not be as dumb as Takahura, that guy's so dumb, he makes fin soup here look like he's a Harvard graduate, but he makes up for it with a taste for human meat." Blackheart warned them.

"Huh?" Lawton said.

"What?" Boomerang said, backing away from Nanaue a little, who didn't seem fazed at what Blackheart said, as he kept following Blackheart.

The next was a man in a well dressed suit.

"This guy's Basil Karlo, Clayface to others, a great actor in his time, known for his violent behavior on and off the set. After learning that there would be a remake of one of his best films without him in it, he went into a crisis, spent everything he had in rejuvenating medicines and experimental operations. After a failed procedure in an experimental clinic, Basil was turned into an abomination with the ability to physically turn into anything and anyone. So the first thing he did with his new powers was go to the recording set of the remake of his film and kill absolutely everyone." Blackheart said.

"So, basically, this guy's made of playdough, and killed people?" Lawton said.

Clayface ignored him. "For years, I trained dutifully in the art of showbiz, but I always felt out of place amongst my fellow actors, for unbeknownst to them, I had strange powers lurking in my very veins. And only now that I, at last, set out on adventure will my strange, nay, eldritch heritage finally begin to express itself."

"Next, we have Cleo Cazo, Ratcatcher 2."

"What, we couldn't afford Ratcatcher 1?" Boomerang laughed, finding it funny there were two Ratcatchers.

"He's dead. This is his daughter." Flag said.

"Oh...continue." Boomerang said, deciding not to push it, laughing's one thing, being a smartass is another thing when it's pissing everyone off enough to want to leave you to die.

"Cazo, will you be joining us?"

"I was doing a word puzzle, it's interesting to think of words that fit." She said, standing up with a tired moan, trying to stretch.

"Kids." Lawton mumbled out, smiling, as it reminded him of his daughter.

DuBois jumped back a little at seeing a rat on her shoulder.

"Oh, no way. That's not coming with us." Dubois said.

"She controls rats." Blackheart said.

"I know, I caught that. It's a disgusting superpower." Dubois said.

"This is Sebastian. Say hello, Sebastian." Cleo said as Sebastian waved his hand.

"I'm not shakin' the rat's hand." Dubois shook his head.

"Aw come on, you two could be related." Boomerang joked, getting a glare from DuBois.

Karlo couldn't help but laugh at that one.

"I can see it, you and a rat, distant cousins." Karlo said.

"How's controlling rats gonna help?" Bane asked.

"It's like Boomerang here, a special skill only she can do." Blackheart said.

"That's stupid." Bane said.

"That rat's staring at me." Lawton said.

Sebastian whined as it stared at Lawton.

"Aww, that means he likes you." Cleo said.

Rick saw Nanaue just staring at everyone, it was hard to tell if he was thinking or not.

The next member of the squad was a young man with a blue coat, a metallic red appendage in the place of his right arm, and shaggy brown hair styled into two 'horns' pointing straight up, who was trying (unsuccessfully) to flirt with one of the female guards.

"Tord Larhansson, or as he prefers to be called, Red Leader," Blackheart stated. "A low-level crook who managed to get his hands on some powerful tech. He tried to use it to start an underground terrorist cell called the Red Army, but was ultimately apprehended before he could get it off the ground. His cybernetic arm is equipped with several potent weapons, and can also be used to interface with most technology. Then, we have Combustion Man," Blackheart continued, directing Mustang's attention to a large, bearded man who was sitting off to the side. The colonel immediately took notice of the metal prosthetics that replaced his right arm and leg, and the eye-like symbol tattooed on his forehead.

"Does he have another name?" Cleo asked.

"Not that we know of," Blackheart shrugged, before continuing his description. "He's a bounty hunter who's perfected a unique type of firebending, which allows him to create explosions with his mind."

DuBois tried to read the expression on the large man's face, but could discern nothing from the assassin's stoic countenance.

Following behind Combustion Man, a muscular humanoid lizard, with a purple jewel in the place of his left eye. "And then there's Rasticore," Blackheart continued. "A famed warrior and mercenary from another dimension, and a veteran of Task Force X. His species, the Septarians, have the innate ability to regenerate from any injury, no matter how fatal. He can take a shot straight to the heart and still come back for more. He's been on more missions than I care to count, and he's been one of the few to always come back alive. Next up is-"

"Hi guys, sorry I'm late joining." the person that interrupted him was Harley Quinn.

"Harley Quinn." Blackheart finished as Harley walked past some of the group to get to the back.

"Flag. Oh, sorry. Comin' through. Hey, Boomer. Hey, Deads." Harley smiled at seeing him.

"What are you doing back in prison, Harls?" Lawton asked, Harkness and Harley broke out after the Enchantress issue, and now back in prison, once again on Task Force X.

"Came back for this, still wanted for my past crimes, trying to get more time off for Cass, My friend Ivy's looking after him." Harley said.

"Who, pray tell, is Cass?" Karlo asked.

"She's my apprentice. We're gonna do great things when I get back..." Harley muttered.

"What's her skill?" Karlo asked, looking back at Waller.

"She... had an asshole of an ex, who thankfully died when Anubis finally got his mitts on him, who made her into what she is now, her years of fighting Batman made her a dangerous fighter, and her unpredictability makes it more unpredictable for your enemies." Blackheart said, being careful not to bring up the Joker. "And then there's this little lady who goes by the name Tatsu Yamashiro, also known as Katana! She's got my back, and can cut all you in half with one sword stroke like she's mowing the lawn. I would advise not getting killed by her, her sword yoinks the souls of its victims." Blackheart said. "And then there's Wes Octavan," he continued, gesturing to a being in a cloak currently being led into the saloon by several OVDF guards. "He's something of a rogue Grimm, smarter, faster, stronger, tougher, and defected from Salem due to being too strong to control." As the newly arrived Wes glanced around the saloon, Flag noted the beast's expression of contempt as he surveyed the various other convicts. Bane, meanwhile, seemed to recognize Wes, and let out a laugh at seeing him arrive, eliciting a growl from the cloaked Grimm.

"While uncalled for, completely understandable, given my history," Wes replied, and though he tried to sound indifferent, his tone betrayed his eagerness to kill. "I'm sure you've heard plenty of tales of heroes saving towns from hordes of beasties, but if you think that's what being a huntsman is about, you're in the wrong place. Let me spell out the danger for you so hopefully you're something more than a snack for the local Grimm."

The Grimm shifted his posture, bending over as he backhanded the rusty projector by his side. It switches on to a horde of Beowolves accompanied by a few Ursa minors.

"In broad strokes, Grimm, like yours truly, are monsters unlike any normal beast. We do not relent, we don't know fear and we have but one goal. Kill you specifically and everyone you know and love in the most brutal way possible while forcing you to watch. No one knows where we came from, no one knows where we go when we die, nor does anyone have any idea why we leave behind the white bone portions of their bodies on death. What they do know is as follows..."

With another slap, the slide changed, showing 2 human silhouettes and a Grimm silhouette. 1 is positioned in a fearful pose and the other is in a neutral pose.

"Huntsmen believe that the Grimm actively target and seek out those experiencing negative emotions, their most common target being fear. Yes, being scared of the Grimm will draw us to you, rather ironic if you think about it... Oh don't give me that look, people need gallows humour if they're gonna survive this line of work."

Another bang of the Grimm's gavel like fist, another change in infographic, this time depicting a human and a grimm with both of their Aura levels marked clearly.

"Some theories suggest it's not the physical bodies we consume that give us sustenance, but instead the Aura we take with every kill and the fear interwoven into that Aura from the attack. Y'all should already be familiar with the relationship between Aura and emotion, so I'll save the baby's first huntsman lesson talk for later. Long story short, we seek out those who don't have control over their Aura and allow their emotions to fully dictate it. Such fear soaked Aura is like a full course meal to us. This is why you often see my folk kill parents and guardians first. To scare those left into being ripe sustenance."

The infographic showed the human being afraid, as their Aura went up, and when the Grimm attacks, it gained more aura than it would normally.

"You may be wondering if this implies a level of intelligence to the Grimm..."

The man looked around.

"To answer your question, yes, yes, we are intelligent. So intelligent that there have been reports of us disguising ourselves, Hiding in delivery trucks, sneaking our way into homes... Some hunters even claim to have heard some of us speak..."

The group looked at the 'man' with baited breath, hanging on his every word.

"Of course... there is some truth in those rumours..." The 'man' said, letting out a low chuckle which transitioned into a snarl. His face, perpetually cloaked in shadow elongating to its true canine shape. Those white boney jaws clawing their way into existence.

"But then again..."

The group looked on perplexed, as the amalgamation of Grimm bowed, his wings billowing out as a stinger jutted out, his claws resembling the claws of a lizard.

"My mother did teach me not to play with my food."

"And then, there's this penguin, one Horace J. Waddleberger, also known as Feathers McGraw." Blackheart said, as a penguin toddled towards them, Blackheart certain of the eagerness for the kill that lurked within that surprisingly cute walk. "This guy's an odd case, a penguin born with more intelligence then his kind, and decided to fight humans to chase them out of the Arctic he called home after some researchers tagged his sisters and invaded his home, even made enemies with Wallace and Gromit when they stopped him from stealing a diamond. Next is this chick." Blackheart continued, as he snapped his fingers.

A blonde warrior in bronze armor, Clementine, appeared in the centre of the room, dropped onto a silver chair by a swirl of darkness that manifested without warning and vanished just as quickly. She checked herself and her equipment, and examined her surroundings. Her eyes widened upon seeing the scope of Sinner's Lane, and the demon looming over her from the bench. She tried to stand up, only to discover she was unable to move from the chair.

Clementine clicked her tongue in frustration and shuffled in the chair. She attempted to mask any fear she felt with her usual bravado, shaken as it was from her last memories before death. She took a wide stance and slouched forward, resting her elbows on her thighs.

"Who are you all supposed to be?" she asked, somewhat cautiously.

"Oh, me?" Blackheart answered. "I am Blackheart, the Son of Mephisto, and this group is the Suicide Squad. I am the one who will be owning your immortal soul, and you're stuck on the Suicide Squad."

Clementine grimaced, swallowing a lump of dread she felt in her throat. "I've never heard of a God named Blackheart before."

"Oh, you wouldn't have," he chuckled. "Your world thinks a bunch of gamers qualify as Gods. I know actual ones, and they're as far beyond the Six Great Gods as they are beyond you. Or perhaps as far as they are beyond a fly, or an ant."

Clementine had no idea what Blackheart meant by 'gamers', of course, but she understood that this man was claiming to be friends with beings significantly more powerful than the Slane Theocracy's patrons. And she certainly remembered dying. Her eyes nervously darted around Sinner's Lane as she tried to come up with something to say.

"Come on, Clementine," Blackheart said. "You can't be surprised that, after the life you lived, you wound up somewhere like this."

Clementine clicked her tongue again and opened her mouth to voice some form of protest, but the words still failed to come to her.

"Okay, why don't you start us off then?" Harley asked. "Little Clementine here seems to be at a loss."

"Despite appearances, Clementine was one of the toughest humans in her world," Blackheart began. "She had entered into what is considered to be the 'Realm of Heroes', exceeding the normal limits of humanity. And furthermore, even among those in this category, she excelled, with very few able to stand against her. By my standards, I'd say... maybe a high-ranking rogue? Something in that area."

"I'm not nearly that weak," Clementine protested. "Let me out of this chair and I'll be happy to give you a demonstration."

"I'll be happy to see it on the battlefield," Blackheart continued, ignoring Clementine's implied threat. "This earned her a place in a group called the Black Scripture, a faction of powerful warriors and mages employed by a country called the Slane Theocracy, one that worships the gamers I mentioned earlier. Clementine was the ninth seat. They all have silly titles; I'm not certain what hers was."

"So she's the same an Ouroboros Enforcer?" Tord asked. "Because that sounds pretty much exactly like an Enforcer."

"Yes, she is similar. About as dangerous, too. And there's a few other similar groups strewn across the multiverse," Blackheart answered. "...But, the Black Scripture didn't really suit Clementine," Blackheart continued, clearing his throat. "She later went rogue and betrayed them, stealing one of their artifacts and fleeing."

"So, why would you do something like that, Clementine?" Katana asked.

"Me and bureaucracy don't really mix," Clementine answered, leaning back in the chair. "Too many rules and too much talking. I thought joining them would be fun, turned out to be a lot of sitting around on my ass twiddling my thumbs."

"Well, I'll clarify some things here," Blackheart said, smiling. "Clementine gets her kicks by killing people. Most of the folk we have on the X-Squad do, on some level, but with Clementine, it isn't part of her nature, nor is it always to further some end. It's more of a compulsion, isn't it, Clementine? You have to kill."

"I don't 'have' to do anything," Clementine responded. "But yeah, I enjoy killing. A girl's gotta have a hobby, you know?"

"Clementine's a classic serial killer," Blackheart said. "Someone who takes trophies from her victims. In her case, usually adventurers, official or not. She targets entire parties, even, wiping them out completely. It's a good target pool. It's similar to picking drifters or prostitutes, even wounded soldiers. Nobody's really surprised when they die unexpectedly. So tell me, Clementine, why do you enjoy killing?"

"It's fun," Clementine answered simply. "And I'm good at it. It's just the natural order of things! I'm stronger than them, so I can do whatever I want."

"Lastly, there's that lass, tall and baggy, and gray and drama king over there." Blackheart said, pointing over at a skinny girl with pale skin. Her hair was light green and styled in a pair of twintails with a lacy black headband. Her eyes were yellow and her muppet-like mouth is usually in a wide v-shape, clad in a gothic-lolita dress that consists of a long-sleeved black bodice with puffy sleeves that flare at the ends with white lace. On her neck is a dark magenta bow. The skirt was two-layered, with dark gray on top and gray at the bottom. She also wore black tights with dark red platform Mary Janes with dark magenta bows around the ankles. The others were a tall, slender man dressed in black, baggy clothing with long sleeves and wore a metallic, almost chameleon-looking helmet that covered his entire head, and a gray-skinned man in a white, off-shoulder, spandex, sleeveless jumpsuit with diamond-shaped cut-outs all over with an even bigger diamond shaped hole at the chest, white opera style gloves with similar diamond cut outs running up them, two golden bangles on his upper arms a golden belt with a red gem around his waist, a red, forked high-collared cape with a black interior covered with golden diamond motifs closed via gold chain which can be added or removed with magic, and a blue diamond earring on his right ear. He also had on large amounts of makeup the most prominent of it being his heavy lilac eyeshadow, black winged eyeliner and white lipstick. "Bibury, former associate of the terrorist known as Noir, who literally tried to erase all sweets, no thanks to it being because one woman, Cure Lumiere, refused to bake sweets for only him. Yeah, he was that petty. Zant was a sorcerer from the Twilight Realm who became the right-hand man of the warlord Ganondorf in exchange for vast power, which he used to usurp the throne from its rightful ruler, Midna. And Ghirahim, that guy was a demonic blade that sought to revive his master, Demise. But then again, Bibury, Zant and Ghirahim do have the magic we'll need for this."

The girl took a bite from one of the cupcakes. They really are good.

Before she knew it, Zant ate the last one.

"Hey!" she shouted. "I need more cupcakes over here!"

Unfortunately, the one who comes to her aid isn't the one she'd prefer.

"I'm cutting you off," Julio (the golden child, Noir's true favorite, the one who got away, her brain whispers) grumbled when he got to her table. He was wearing one of the standard Sinner's Lane uniforms, oversized stetson hat and all. It's not the strangest thing she's seen today, but considering it's a sight she never thought she'd see in her (admittedly very long) life, it's near the top of the list.

"And who are you to decide that?" Ghirahim sniped back, every syllable crafted to sound as calm as possible.

"I get to decide that because I work here. You've all had at least twenty-five cupcakes so far. We're running low, and the kitchen's on fire thanks to Supana, Miuu and Hideri accidentally, and literally, burning the water and Houtaro, Mafuyuu, Kaho and Maika are trying to keep it from spreading. And I know you don't have a way to pay for them, either. But then again, Supana's not as bad as those three, they still haven't started yet and already they're suffering a mental breakdown."

"I assure you, it wasn't my doing...this time, at least." Zant said, his hands twirling around themselves. "I think they were in some cult or whatever and they're just learning that life's not how they thought it was."

Sabimaru and Renge were huddled together and not speaking. Rinne was in a corner in a fetal position rocking back and forth. "It was all a lie, it was all a lie, it was all a lie…"

"Yeah, I should have eased them into it instead of dropping a huge truth bomb on them…sorry, lack of filter?" Blackheart said, genuinely sounding sorry.

"Um, I'm just gonna be blunt, how old are they and is there context?" DuBois asked.

"Rio's thirteen," Blackheart answered proudly. "Zant's around three hundred or five hundred, Ghirahim's thousands of years old, and Bibury's over a hundred, and definitely younger than Zant. Well, I'm not sure how old either of those two truly are. Time passed differently in Noir's dimension and the Twilight Realm. As for why those three are having a breakdown, it turns out some rogue alchemist cult did a lot of damage to the minds and memories of people to keep their cult-like society centered around outdated alchemy hidden even when other magical and alchemy-related communities have long since gone out in the open." Blackheart added. "Though those three ladies and their boss Geryon gave the OVDF the slip. And that teacher of theirs, Minato, is stuck on janitor duty in Tartarus with Adam, Faraday, Sekhmet, Hunter Kain, and the Proto-Starfleet group, but I'm sure the other four'll be caught eventually, too."

DuBois stared flatly. "You're lying."

"I'm not, actually, now, Task Force X, follow Flag to the meeting room." Blackheart added, as the team quieted down as Flag looked at them all.

"Alright, like it or not, your family for the next few days, probably, you listen to the orders you're given, stick to your team, and you get time off your sentence." Rick said as he started walking, knowing they were following him to a conference room.

"Sync City, West Virginia, the place you go to if you want to see the HQT, Highly Questionable Tower. The local heroes there, the Ultra Violets, yes, the name's dumb, but they broke out some animals from an illegal lab and shut down a plan to take over a school through perfume in 2013 and stopped a mutant invasion in 2014. Now, on December 14th, a blizzard rolled into town, causing spirits to roll in, and for demons to walk among them. The UN ran out of options, the public wanted something done with the ghosts, so the OVDF granted permission for Task Force X to do this mission today, take care of the cause of the mist, and apprehend them, if they resist, you have my permission to kill. Any questions?" Blackheart said, before Nanaue raised his hand.

"Nanaue?"

"Hand." Nanaue said, pointing at his hand.

"Yes, that is your hand, Nanaue, very good." Blackheart chortled. "And I needed to speak with all of you."

"We have received a disturbing report," Flag explained. "It seems the wanted serial killer Mechainfinite has escaped from maximum-security detainment."

"THAT FREAK GOT OUT?" Bane cried, he then gave a frightened swear in Tantalog.

"Furthermore," Flag went on, "our intelligence has reported that he has gone completely off-world. Not just into space, but across interspace. And while this last bit is simply rumors, there are those who have said he allied with other wanted criminals from between the worlds."

"Does the term 'Deadlight' mean anything to you?" Blackheart asked.

"Deadlight?" Harley repeated. "Isn't that Stephen King?"

"It's used by Stephen King, yes," Blackheart said, "but no laughing matters. It's also the name of a terrorist organization that slaughtered hundreds, even thousands, of galaxies, all for a twisted show."

"As Mr. Hartford said," Flag reiterated gruffly, "we can't prove a connection at this stage. However, with Mech the Ripper at large, the X-Squad will need to prevent him from killing more people."

"First, we've got another ghost to get, then a car to catch." Blackheart said.

---

In a plume of smoke, the group appeared before a crowd of souls clutching picket signs demanding better conditions.

"Who's in charge here?" Bane asked the crowd.

The ghosts all pointed at Russell. The whole group, except for Blackheart, glared at Russell in quiet confusion.

"In my defense, I haven't been running anything in the past hour," Russell said.

"So true," a woman's soul said as she approached the two. "Since our badass vampire got cold ass feet, I've been running this show. This ain't the first time I've led a revolution from the basement."

Russell sighed. "Hello Fish."

"Only my friends call me Fish," she warned, pointing a long perfectly manicured nail in Russell's face. "And I don't stay friends with little bitches who abandon their friends."

Fish Mooney was a mid-tier crime boss in Gotham city with aspirations of being on top. However, she was soundly bested in her grab for power and later found herself turned into a cuttlefish DNA hybrid monster feared by all of Gotham. She tried to conquer all of Gotham with an army of metahuman monsters (you really can't blame a girl for trying) before she was slain at the hands of a drugged up lunatic. She ended up here in the Underworld and worked as Russell's second-in-command once he started to unionize the ghosts.

"This is all very cute, but, hey, I don't have time for this," Rasticore said, pulling out a chainsaw.

"Now, wait a minute," Russell interrupted. "I think maybe Fi- Um, Ms. Mooney might be of some use to our little club."

"Oh no, no, no, no," DuBois said, "we are NOT becoming a half-way house for wayward souls. This is NOT the Merv Griffin show, and I'm not gonna let Feathers go 'You get a resurrection and YOU get a resurrection, everybody gets resurrections!'"

The souls all began to cheer hearing DuBois say that.

"HE SAID NOT, DUMBASSES, NOT, N-O-T!" Blackheart shouted at them. "Sheesh, learn to listen to more than just to what you wanna hear."

"She's very intelligent and talented," Russell argued. "Without her, this whole union thing'll be a distant memory for you."

"Great! Perfect! Then I think Feathers' just gonna kill her," Lawton said, seeing Feathers pulled out a plasma launcher.

"Thanks for the help, Russell," Fish said sarcastically. "Look, I don't know what these moron souls are after, aside from maybe some better sleeping arrangements, but I had plans back in Gotham. I was going to bring the city to its knees or burn it to the ground."

The fires in Blackheart's hands subsided as Lawton put down his gun. "Really? Huh. Ya don't say! Y'know, I kinda like your spunk, Fishy. Maybe you are Task Force X material."

"That's our little group," Russell added. "I'm a recent addition myself."

"Hmm, color me interested," Fish said. "But I doubt I'll be of much help as a simple ghost."

"Right, yeah, fine, resurrection," Blackheart said with a sigh as he snapped his fingers to summon up a magical contract. "Just sign here… Initial there… Stamp here… Drop of blood there…"

Fish did so and the contract disappeared right away. Red energy surged in Blackheart's hands, creating a glow that contrasted greatly with the blue and gray aesthetic of Blackheart and the surrounding area.

"Blammo!"

He released the red energy and it began to swirl around Fish like a serpent coiling around its prey. As the energy swirled, her human body began to manifest. No longer was she a mere phantom of her previous self; now she was truly Fish Mooney once more.

---

Across the cosmos, in the Land Without Magic, one woman was having an absolutely wretched day. It hadn't been easy being banished to a strange new world with only the fur coat on her back, but Cruella had made due. Finding out she was a fictional cartoon character to this world certainly had been an adjustment as well, albeit a beneficial one. She found an old, rich, white guy with a fetish for "Disney villains," and from there it was life in the lap of luxury.

Or at least it was until the FBI got involved. Something about ponzi schemes and white collar crime. Now she was watching all of her diamonds and material wealth being stripped away from her. It was like a bad cosmic joke. When she noticed her fur coat rack being rolled away, she ran after her babies and snatched one of them away.

"Sorry lady," the FBI officer said, trying to take it from her unrelenting grasp.

"This was mine before!" she growled.

It was the only fur coat she had when she arrived in this world. The officer backed off and let her have it. She slipped on the coat and gave it a squeeze. She lived for furs, she worshipped furs, and holding it gave her the warm feeling that everything would turn out alright.

"Cruella De Vil," a voice behind her said.

Cruella froze in place. She knew that voice. But how in the Hell could that voice be here?

"No one calls me that here," she said, turning around to face him.

Unlike what she suspected, standing before her was Blackheart, along with Harley, Lawton, Bibury, Zant, Ghirahim, Harkness, DuBois, Nanaue, Fish, Russell, Cleo, Rasticore, Combustion Man, Feathers, Fish, Russell, Tord, Katana, Cad Bane, and Flag.

"Well I'm sorry, but Cruella Feinberg doesn't have quite the same ring," Blackheart said with a smirk.

"What in the Hell are you doing here?" she asked.

"You know what I'm looking for," Blackheart said. "A glory I can soon return to you as well if you join this little group."

"I'm not going anywhere with you," Cruella spat, turning around to walk towards the garage.

"Things have changed!" Blackheart called out. "While the last time together was... less than ideal. But now we've both lost all that we have. We need each other. I can get you back everything you want and more!"

"You know you talk a good game, demon, but can you deliver?" Cruella asked. "In a Land Without Magic where apparently walking is a challenge?"

She gestured to his cane. It was amusing that one as powerful as the fearsome Son of Mephisto could have such a rudimentary disability like limping.

"Ah, but there is magic in this world and others," Blackheart said. "One just has to know where to look. The failures in the past have been for one reason: the odds were stacked against you by a man called The Author. His book harnessed a great power: giving heroes and villains what he considers their just desserts, until he tragically died by my hands."

Cruella sneered. "Well I suppose that's better than blaming bad judgment and gin."

"Now, let's go get you a new, even better life," Blackheart said. "Unless you prefer life as the financially destitute wife of a convict."

There really was no choice at all. Cruella knew she couldn't trust Blackheart as far as she could throw him, but if there really was an author of her destiny, she was happy that Blackheart killed him. After all, what kind of sadist separated a girl from her best furs? Cruella opened the garage door and gestured to her prized possession that the FBI missed: a modified black and white 1980s Zimmer Golden Spirit.

"Get in," Cruella said with a grin.

The group loaded up in the car, and Cruella cranked the ignition.

"Now, darling, where are we going?" she asked.

Blackheart smiled. "A quaint little place called Sync City, West Virginia."

---

One afternoon in Sync City, standing atop a building was a young woman at the age of twenty with wild reddish-brownish hair, blue gray eyes, red lipstick. What stood out the most about her was her choice in attire. She wore a red trench coat and cordovan hat with a black jumpsuit underneath.

To some, she was just a normal person in a crowd, but what many did not know was that she was the infamous Carmen Sandiego, a super thief that's avoided capture by police, Interpol, and so many other law enforcers. While she had a reputation for being a master thief, they had no idea actual thievery was not her M.O.

Carmen looked out into the city smiling, "Ah, Sync City, the HQT's home." she told herself.

"It's a heck of a town, Red." came a boy's voice.

Carmen held up her phone to reveal a young teenage boy on video chat, "Care to swap facts, Player?"

"Delighted," the boy identified as Player, answered, as he pulled up information on Carmen's location, "Sync City, West Virginia is regarded as the most unnatural place in the U.S. And is best described as the superhero, yokai, and all around madhouse capital of the world."

Carmen decided to lay some facts down herself, "And it's home to the headquarters of the superhero group called the Ultra Violets."

"And that's not all Sync City's famous for." came another boy's voice with a Boston accent. Popping in was an eighteen year old boy with light red hair, light cornflower blue eyes and freckles sprinkled across his face. His attire was composed of a white and red baseball jersey, a black long-sleeve undershirt, dark blue jeans, and gray sneakers.

"Really, so what do you know, Zack?" Carmen inquired.

"It happens to be the city where the first yokai-ran pizzeria in the United States opened in 2085! Mmm, pizza." Zack salivated.

"Only you would know food facts, little bro." came a girls voice with a Boston accent.

It belonged to a nineteen year old girl with chin-length reddish-orange hair, and blue eyes with freckles on her cheeks. She had a broad and fit figure and was shorter than Carmen and Zack. Her attire included a black t-shirt with blue sleeves, gray capri pants, and red sneakers.

"When it comes to food knowledge, Ivy, I'm the master." Zack boasted.

"That's a fact." Player answered.

"The fact that is important is this city is the latest location of VILE operations." came another voice that sounded Japanese. The voice belonged to a middle aged Japanese man with a semi shaved head, moderate wrinkles upon his face, and a physically fit form. His attire included a black polo with gray trousers and black shoes.

"Which is exactly why we're here, Shadowsan." Carmen answered.

"It ain't gonna be easy finding VILE in a city like this." Ivy warned Carmen.

"It's never easy," Carmen answered, "We just have to follow the bread crumbs."

"And the crumbs lead to an abandoned warehouse in the city." Player said checking plans on VILE's hard drive.

"Anything specific about this abandoned warehouse?" Carmen asked.

"Nothing. I mean it's just a plain old abandoned warehouse. No important history behind it or nothing."

"Nevertheless, it is some form of front for one of VILE's operations." Shadowsan suspected.

"And we're gonna see what's going down tonight." Carmen said.

"I just hope it's just VILE and nothing else." Zack feared.

"What else could there be?" Ivy asked rhetorically.

"Uh, hello. Have you ever read the papers?" Zack asked, getting in his sisters face, "Didn't you hear this city has also been known to be the sighting of so many things, from the Joan River incident, the time where a red mist flooding the place, and so much more? Like that report of the weather going cuckoo some time ago?"

"The media was indeed all over it," Carmen admitted, "But still regardless of whatever rep this city has of attracting strange creatures that's not going to stop us from stopping VILE from threatening the world or more."

---

Corpses and blood littered the house. Moonlight shined through the unbroken windows. All the while, a young man and women stood in the middle of it all, making out, as the X-Squad accidentally walked in on them.

"Mmm, I love you Edward."

"And I love you, Bella."

"Nooooooo!" yelled all the young adults, teenagers and kids, leaving the older adults, along with Feathers, Bibury, Zant and Ghirahim, completely lost.

"No more sparkles, mama. No more sparkles, mama." Blake said, rocking back and forth in the fetal position from sheer fear of what was to come. She knew these characters, this series, and the literary horror it had spawned.

"Keep them away from us!" Weiss screamed.

"Sanctuary! Sanctuary!" Hibiki yelled.

"Stay back, you sparkly freaks! Back!" Drakus yelled, aiming BlueBlaze at them.

There was knocking at the door.

"Who is it?" asked Edward, drawing his gun.

"Where are my manners?" said another voice behind the door. "My name is Akko Kagari."

Suddenly, bullets flew through the door, blasting Edward and his body collapsed to the ground, as Feathers shot the man to make sure he stayed dead.

"You know, a real fucking vampire." The young brunette girl said, grinning.

"Oh, thank god." Blake let out with a huge sigh of relief.

"You said it." Tord said, "Shame on whoever made that movie."

Glass shattered as Bella ran from the squad and vampire.

---

Soon, the X-Squad and Suicide Squad were chasing Bella through the streets on a dark and stormy morning, or a bright and sunshiny night. Overcast with a chance of gumballs and not a cloud in the sky. But what really matters is that it was a cold as hell winter in Sync City and Gensyoko when the blizzard first appeared. Foggy, white-and-blue-colored and mysterious, it slowly crept outward each day. As the days passed, more and more land was engulfed by the fog as it continued to billow out throughout Sync City and Gensyoko unopposed. At this rate, it would be only a few more days until the mist covered the whole land, then spread past the border into the open world, causing mass chaos!

I don't know what the weather is when it involves blizzards, okay?

"Hey, Starbright, you have the other target?"

A blonde Finnish girl sped after the X-Squad with a sniper rifle lining up her shot at Bella.

"Master Akko, I know we agreed on nicknames, but my name is Lotte Yanson. And yes, I have the target in sight."

"Kill her!" Blake yelled at Lotte.

"What are you waiting for? She's getting away."

"I've...never really killed anyone before. I still need time to adjust-"

"She's getting away."

"I know. I heard you-"

"You know that book series you like so much? Nightfall?"

"Wait, why are you-"

"They were trash-talking it back there. Really bad. In fact, their names were Edward and Bella, like parodies of Egar and Belle. They even said that Twilight was-"

The sniper rifle rang out, and Bella's body exploded into a mess of blood and guts.

"NIGHTFALL IS A WORK OF ART, AND TWILIGHT WILL NEVER HOLD A CANDLE TO IT!"

"Thank you!" Blake yelled.

"There's something to unpack there, isn't there?" Yang asked.

"Well, there isn't enough time in the day." Bibury said.

While Lotte began to rant, Akko smiled to herself.

"What a treasure she is. This is going to be fun."

---

Soon, the X-Squad, Lotte, Akko, a pink-haired South Asian girl, and Suicide Squad are currently shivering and huddling together to stay warm.

"Comfy," Lute grumbled, hauling her body off the snow they were currently on. She spent the past hour or so doing nothing but figuring out what the fuck winter is, her anxiety and (begrudgingly) child-like wonder never leaving her system. Which brought her to where she was now.

"Warm up a bit. I ain't gonna be responsible for your death via hypothermia," Drakus flew over to Lute, handing the angel a blanket.

Lute growled as she felt her face heat up at the implications, snatching the blanket from Drakus' hand and wrapping herself in it, looking very much adorkable.

"Blackheart, you crazy bitch!" Cruella yelled as she shivered in the snow.

"Why is there so much snow?!" Kanade said.

Kirby was literally sleeping in the snow, not even feeling affected.

"If I knew it was gonna be a snow den, I would have worn warmer clothes." Daki shivered in her long-sleeve shirt and shorts, not to mention flip-flops, as Gyutaro stole a blanket and covered her and himself up, with only their heads sticking out. "Is everyone okay?"

"Yay, snow!" Yuina said, rolling a snowball alongside King Shark. "I'mma make a snowman!"

Kirbo was praying to the Lord on an altar made of snow, with Combustion Man, Feathers, Zant and Bibury being dragged onto their knees as well. "Poyo poyo, poyo poyo, poyo poyo, poyo, poyo poyo poyo poyo poyo poyo!" Which roughly translates to "Heavenly Father, We pray for comfort for everyone around the omniverse that are going through difficult times. Thank you for reminding us that we are blessed in order to be a blessing to others. And, finally, we thank you for loving us so much by sending your son Jesus Christ, so that we may have eternal life. In Jesus' name, Amen!"

"Auntie Fish?" Drakus muttered, his eyes tearing up.

"Fish?" Penguin whispered, still unsure if he was seeing things.

"I know, I know, it's astonishing," Fish said with a grin, echoing her words from long ago. "Sometimes I astonish myself."

"No. No, no, no, no! I SAW YOU DIE!" Penguin replied, as Drakus ran to hug Fish. "I held you in my arms, and you said you were actually done for this time. You can't be real! You're... you're..."

"When you threw me over the warehouse roof into the river below, the last thing I said before I died was 'It's all good,'" Fish recounted. "The only other person who would know that is Butch. So, yes, I'm quite real."

"But...but... how? Hugo Strange didn't-" Drakus stuttered.

"Honey, I rose up from the dead," Fish said with a shrug. "I do it all the time."

Riddler inched away from Fish cautiously. The one interaction he'd had with the woman, she'd had her stooges and Drakus pointing machine guns at him. As close as he and Penguin had become, he had no idea where he would stand with Fish with regards to whatever it was that she was obviously planning. This motion was not lost on Fish.

"You've got nothing to fear from me, Mr. Nygma," Fish said. "Any friend of Oswald's is a friend of mine."

"Yes, I'm aware of how you changed your tune on him," Riddler said. "Forgive me if I'm still a bit hesitant around you after you tried to murder me last time."

"Now, now, Ed, play nice," Penguin urged. "Everyone in this general vicinity has tried to kill one another at some point. Except... umm...I'm sorry, who are you again?"

Penguin gestured to Bane, who was lurking behind Fish, observing this scene play out.

"Cad Bane," he answered. "You could say I'm Fish's new partner in crime... Well, one of a few, actually."

"Are you... some sort of alien?" Penguin asked, unable to peel his eyes away from the bounty hunter.

"Yes," Bane answered. "I'm a Duros."

"Aliens? Really?" Riddler asked skeptically.

"That's far from the strangest thing," Fish replied. "Perhaps you two best sit down for this next part..."

Arthi's pale cheeks flushed a deep rose as Sabrina glared at her smugly from their snowy tomb.

"What was that you said about being queen of ice and snow?" Sabrina said, smirking.

"I-I never said my powers were fully restored, fool girl!" Arthi stammered, pride warring with embarrassment, squirming in the freezing drifts, mismatched eyes darting about helplessly.

"It seems my abilities are not entirely...recalibrated," Arthi hissed through gritted teeth. A rueful smirk tugged at her blue lips. "Nor do I recall how to undo...this."

She waved an imperious hand at their predicament, flakes drifting from frosted hair. Arthi huffed a sharp sigh, frosty breath billowing in the chill air.

"It appears my eternal dominion must wait, as my pet has trapped me most effectively." Steely pride remains, yet a grudging respect lights her gaze. "Well played, girl...for now. But you have not seen the last of my power!"

"Why couldn't we just wear warm clothes?!" Mystle said.

"D-Dream Kid, we n-need to s-s-stand out!" Roman shivered, as Neo glared at him.

"Then why not flashy coats instead?!" Harley snapped.

"Have to stay hot, have to stay hot, have to stay hot..." Ridley muttered.

"Now all we need is some actual heat..." Neo snarked.

"YOU. FLESHBAG."

The squad turned around to see where the new voice had come from. A pile of computer shrapnel was trembling. A set of metal pincers roughly the size of a human hand broke through the surface of the garbage pile.

"Oh, the computer's alive!" Drakus called out. "I didn't realize there was a sentient AI in there! Yeah, my bad."

A crank emerged alongside the pincers. Acting as two hands, they pushed away the debris, allowing for a monitor-shaped head to poke through. The square, flat face started out completely black, but then gained three electric-blue lines: the shape of two narrowed eyes and a mouth in a half-frown of disgust. It conveyed the most disgust possible in the most minimalistic way possible.

"Let Heavy help you!" Heavy ran toward the computer entity, prying away some of the garbage.

"Did I say I wanted your help?" the computer replied. Its mouth didn't move at all, but the voice definitely came from its speakers. "You've helped me enough, I think."

"We didn't know," Drakus reiterated.

It pried itself out of the pile, righting itself. Now Evelyn could see its true form: a robot with a pincer hand, a crank hand, and a monitor head, just a little shorter than the average human being. Well, it was also using some sort of blue energy ray to levitate, and if that kicked out, it would be even shorter.

"Where even am…?" It swiveled its head to get a good look. "Oh. Great. GREAT. West Virginia, one of the states in the Bible Belt. Thank you so much, Grimora. This was definitely the way to spare us all from suffering."

"Did you lose your world too?" Weiss asked.

"You have no idea," the computer replied.

"Was it Rai Xin and McGlitch?" Drakus went on. "Team RWBY here lost their world to Deadlight's antics."

"No, I was ejected from my game because a pompous necromancer decided to stop me by destroying literally everything," the computer replied. Its expression changed to a smirk drawn in blue lines; "But she didn't completely wipe me out. I still made the upload. She just didn't know about it. People are buying copies from online game stores this instant. My work is being seen by thousands." Its scowl returned. "If only I were there to ACTUALLY TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE INVASION I MADE. Anyway, I would thank you for waking me, at least, but I'm not going to because you're really annoying. If you'll excuse me, I have to get back to the nothing that is my life."

Evelyn sighed. "You can come with us if you REALLY want to."

"I don't want to," the computer said.

"Well, I'm offering," Evelyn told it, "so you'd better take it before I change my mind."

"So change it. Leave me alone."

"You don't know what you're passing up!"

"Yes. I do."

"Aw, you two are both so stubborn!" Drakus broke in. Then, at practically lightning speed, he'd brought them together, an arm around each of their necks. "You are going to get along as the best of friends!"

"LET GO!" the computer barked.

Drakus then relinquished them both, then turned to the computer he'd unwittingly brought back to life. "My name is Drakus Hydrax, prince of Drakonia!" he said. "What's yours?"

"P03," the computer replied. "Not that you care."

"Evelyn Claythorne," Evelyn said. "I should think most game characters have been touched by the Claythorne family at this point. You should feel honored."

P03 went silent. Then broke out laughing hysterically – which sounded strangely more natural than what they expected. "Oh, that's RICH! You think out of all the worlds I sent my game to, I'd remember someone on some backwater world because you're just that important?"

"Worlds?" Clementine repeated. "What are you – there's only ONE reality!"

"We tried to tell her," Bane sighed. "But she just wouldn't listen."

"Oh, this is even funnier," P03 said, its smirk returned. "You think you're in the cyber wastes connected to your own reality and that's all there is to it. Do you actually get the concept of 'infinite'? Of course not. That lump of meat inside your skull can't comprehend true infinity. We're both from a plane that exists between all of the online and technological dimensions created on EVERY WORLD! Well, not ALL of them, I suppose, since MY ORIGINAL COPY OF INSCRYPTION WAS PURGED!"

"Inscryption?" Karlo repeated. "Is that your game? Clementine's from something called Yggdrasil, and – "

"NO ONE CARES," P03 interrupted, scowling again. "It's probably an MMORPG anyway from the looks of her. Ugh."

"I'm starting to like you," Drakus said with a smirk.

"It's not mutual," P03 snapped. "Though I guess as far as fleshbags go, you're respectable in your...cockiness."

"Quest ce que?"

The squad continued shivering.

"Wouldja lookit that, see? Dumb lizard's a wreck, yeah. Yeah, a wreck, see?" Another accent spat, followed by a chorus of smaller 'yeahs'.

Again, the squad shivered…

"A right fine mess we gotten ourselves into," a cajun-spiced voice joined in.

The first voice piped up once more, laced with curiosity. "Pesky dragon is not dead, is he? Zat would be no fun at all. Huhuhuhuhu…"

He was hearing things, the Drakonian surmised. He had finally caught some level of delusion where the voices of creatures he had encountered over the years had reappeared and spoke in his head. Le Quack, Cajun Fox…

"Yeah, been a long time since we seen this guy's mug, see?"

Big Toe, too? It was fine.

"I do declare, that dragon's looking flour-white about now."

Shivering, Drakus curled himself up into a ball and huddled near Lute for warmth.

"Hm. He looks bad," a soft, slithering voice hissed out. "Even worse than I remember. Like a wet sack of cotton candy, and I haven't even had the pleasure of drowning him yet."

He plugged his ears as the voices didn't seem to go away. Rather, they grew louder. And more of them were appearing.

"How annoying. Seems a shame to come all zees way, just to have him die of fright, isn't eet?"

Drakus started hyperventilating.

'I'm dreaming! I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming, this can't be real! It just can't!'

Finally, to appease his maddening mind and his pounding heart, Drakus opened his eyes.

Several eyes and figures stared down at him in response.

They were real.

"Ayo, where the fuck did you come from?!" Drakus finally asked.

"OH, how I missed that voice!" Cajun Fox grinned as he leaned over the shocked dragon. "Now he's startin' to look like the stupid dragon we all rememba!"

Drakus' heart pounded in his chest. "I'M INSANE, NOT DUMB, YOU FU-!"

He felt something grab his neck, hoisting him up by the collar. What little strength he had left had him wriggling frantically, whining as he was jerked forward to face one of the figures, his broken heart leaping into his throat as he found himself staring straight into the cold yellow eyes of Katz.

The scarlet cat's gaze never broke from him.

"Lizard Man," he spoke up, and his tone dripped with the same venomous discontentment at Drakus' existence as it always had. "Do be useful for once and… shut up."

Drakus' hands rose, clamping his mouth shut.

"There's a good boy."

Furina was lounging on the couch the squad stole from a furniture store. She shivered as she felt the heat leave her body. "This is unbearable..." Even in her attire, this was too much as the cold had decided to rear its head as soon as the AC decided to perish. A part of her wanted to hold a funeral for the appliance but was convinced by Neo to instead call someone to fix it. That was three hours ago.

She looked at the clock and got more nervous, "Ugh... How much longer is this gonna take?" she vented to her three familiars, earning a soft pat on the back by Gentilhomme Usher, which did actually feel nice considering he was made of pure cool hydro. Before she could think of anything else to help warm up, she was startled by a loud grinding and banging noise from the AC. It made such horrendous noises that she was just about to hold an actual funeral rite, kidnap someone and commit a blood sacrifice to appease the angry spirit of centralized air, when it stopped as quickly as it had reanimated before returning back to normal as Drakus shut it off and lit a bonfire, blessing the archon with warmth. She quickly jumped up and put her face against it letting it warm her up as she sighed contently. She let herself relax feeling the wonderful warm heat against her face as she closed her eyes.

A lone snowflake drifted to land upon Arthi's pale nose, clinging stubbornly. Arthi crosses her eyes comically, vainly trying to blow it away. But try as she might, it remained stuck.

"Oh dear, are you trying to blow a snowflake, Arthi?" Sabrina said, smirking as Arthi blushed at her girlfriend's smugness.

"Silence, foolish girl! Your mockery does nothing to remove this infernal flake!" Arthi snapped, as she huffed another frosty puff, small nose scrunching in concentration and irritation. Defeat glinted reluctantly in her eyes. The eternal queen of ice and snow wriggled helplessly, mismatched eyes pleading.

"Well? Are you going to assist your immortal queen or not, pet?" Arthi growled. Pride warred with cuteness as Sabrina reached to gently brush the flake away. Arthi leaned into the tender touch despite herself.

Darth Vader was not having a good day. Well, he hadn't had a good day in twenty years, but most of them were degrees of terrible that could at least be tolerated. With the horrible burns on his body, the respirator controlling his breathing, or Palpatine's lightning sessions every time he screwed up in the slightest, Darth Vader's life had turned into a living Hell two decades ago, when Obi Wan took the High Ground.

As Vader exhaled forcefully in an attempt to mimic what others might call a tired sigh, his vocoder translated that to a burst of static. The Dark Lord's annoyance at this minor inconvenience however, prevented him from noticing that he was about to walk straight into one of the Devastator's walls. Thankfully for Darth Vader, he did not walk into a wall. Unfortunately for everyone else, he accidentally stepped into a magic door which had appeared into said wall, and walked straight into Sync City, West Virginia.

"Holy shit! It's a coke addict!" yelled a voice which clearly belonged to an adolescent boy, a teenager.

Another voice, one belonging to a girl of perhaps similar age, spoke up and the Sith Lord could feel his fear. "Uh…my love? That's Darth Vader." The Dark Lord didn't understand whatever language they were speaking however. What was happening?

Vader felt some intense Force Presences back away in fear. Were these Jedi? Padawans which had escaped him or children which some wayward Master had trained? Darth Vader then realized he was face-flat into the ground, so he pulled himself onto his feet and looked around.

From the look of things, his surroundings appeared to be of a populated city, and judging by the many storefronts and the feelings of intense fear from presumably civilians flooding his senses from all directions, they were in no way prepared to face him. Wait…wasn't he just on his ship? How in the Sith Hells had he ended up in a city on some random planet? One where he couldn't sense nor see any Imperial presence whatsoever? What backwater heck was this?

Vader's eyes snapped to a band of civilians, Riff Tamson of the Separatists, Cad Bane himself, and the fallen Jedi Pong Krell, who dragged him near them to huddle around a primitive fire. The one leading was a teenage boy, presumably the one who he'd heard speak before. He seemed to be wearing…a costume? A girl next to her wore a costume as well, seemingly designed out of black and white silk.

The boy with rainbow –yes, most of those other shades of red must be orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, black and white, he'd learned to recognize colors over the years- hair slowly inched closer. "Uh…hello?" he said in Basic. "Are you Darth Vader?" he asked, as if it wasn't obvious.

While interacting with this local seemed a waste of time, Vader had no way to contact the Empire, and needed to know what had even brought him here. "Yes." he affirmed. "I require directions to the nearest Imperial Outpost." he told the boy in the least threatening tone he could muster, since civilians often became unwell in his presence. Besides…this feeling in the Force. It felt almost divine.

Around the same time, a huge bone satellite suddenly appeared and crashed beside them, which the squad noticed.

"WHAT THE?!" Drakus screamed, before the squad shrugged and started rummaging for loot, as Neo pulled something out with the help of Ridley. It was large and purple with a giant white lip and what appeared to be a flashlight for an eye.

Drakus gasped as Trixie looked confused. "What is it?"

"It looks like a robot..." Drakus said. "I never thought I'd see one like this up close."

"Wait, here's another!" Zap said, as he pulled out a small squat robot that had a gumball machine for a head.

"Another robot?" Drakus said in awe as Ridley examined it.

"I wonder how the arms work." Ridley asked.

"We've got two more as well." said Krell, pulling out two more robots.

One was a small orb with a camera lens built into it, and the other was a Tupperware dish / ping pong balls / hockey mask / bowling pin designed robot.

Drakus looked in amazement as he grinned. "That is amazing..."

Mera blinked as she stared at them. "You could almost mistake them for puppets..."

"Well, you think they were made from parts of this satellite?" Kanade asked.

"They may as well be..." Roman said.

"Indeed." Taeko said. "But all of them seem pretty out of it..."

"Okay, what to do with the robots?" Otoya asked, looking towards the four robots, who looked out of it.

"Keep them around here for now. Have them explore, experiment with them a little, if need be." Ravage said.

"Snipsy Girl was talking about the ones in front of us!" Drakus snapped, seeing three human-sized, and bipedal, robots, staring at Ravage.

"Megatron was a great leader, yes, but one on a fool's errand, chasing the ghost of the All Spark for centuries before his tragic termination… I seriously doubt that you'll find it in my new leader." Ravage said.

"Silence, Ravage! Megatron is wise, bold, and will return to lead the Decepticons back to Cybertron!" The purple and green robot yelled.

"Yeah yeah, and wipe away the Autobots, we know that." The spider robot snapped.

"As usual Blackarachnia, your demeanor is as unpleasant as that accursed organic mode of yours." The purple and gray robot said in a German accent.

"At least I only got one face instead of three, split face." the spider robot, Blackarachnia, said.

"Okay, what's with Ice Schnitzel's deal?" Drakus asked.

"Drakus, you don't realize that those are Starscream, Lugnut, Blackarachnia, and Blitzwing?!" Ravage whispered.

"How should I know, you don't talk about your time on the Decepticons often!" Drakus whispered back.

That was when the robot's face changed from blue to red.

"The name is Blitzwing, reptile! And besides, insect, it was your experiments that made me this way in the first place! Remember it! Cause it's the last thing you're gonna hear before I…" Blitzwing ranted in an Austrian accent, before the face changed from red to black. "Express my feelings in song! The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout!"

"Will you idiots keep it down?!" Ravage snapped.

Just then, the eyes of the purple and silver robot started to flicker on, and the robot suddenly shot upwards as he aimed his blasters out at Drakus.

""You dare strike ME, Megatron? After all my loyal stellar cycles of—wh-wu-wait, how did I get here? I'm picking up five Decepticon energy signatures..." he then gasped. "But not my own! I'm too young to be offline!" He started freaking out, terrified at the realization that he's essentially dead. "All right this obviously isn't the Well of All Sparks, so I can't be that offline..." The robot was now tapping on his forehead, before suddenly feeling something wedged in there. Curious and still terrified at the fact he's dead, he leaned over and looked at his reflection in the mirror Drakus stole, seeing a small cyan shard embedded in his forehead.

"A piece of the AllSpark… I'm guessing something must have happened to it and a piece ended up on me, which makes little old Starscream… immortal! Now, prepare yourself Megatron, for my vengeance will be swift and…pain...ful... no wait, if I strike the lizard organic, who I'm pretty sure is Megatron's new vessel, head on, his followers would rip me to pieces." Starscream said, as Drakus looked at him confused.

"Wait! I sense that Megatron still lives! We must deliver him the key!" Lugnut yelled.

"Megatron?! Lugnut, don't be an idiot! Megatron is offline! I did it mys… Uhhhh, I meant I saw it myself." Starscream said, backpedaling before he accidentally revealed that he was the one who killed Megatron, wincing as Drakus looked at him confused.

"Wrong! Megatron lives through the dragon organic! And he wants us to follow him!" Lugnut yelled, bowing before Drakus. "Oh, Master! I am not worthy, I am not worthy...What happened to your body?"

"Yeah yeah, long story involving me snorting the AllSpark like coke and now I have him in my brain." Drakus said. "Hey, Megatron, your possible personal attack dog's looking at me confused."

"So it seems, Hydrax." Megatron gave an amusing chuckle. "I imagine this must be quite the accomplishment for you."

"I have you to thank for that, Megsy." Drakus replied. "Your soul did lead this group to me."

Megatron noticed the tone in Drakus' voice. "You seem very impressed by your feat."

"This victory feels rather empty." Drakus replied. "Compared to the vast reaches of the omniverse, turning a Lich over to my side seems rather insignificant, hell, even rather small when compared to the grand scheme of things."

"Perhaps." Megatron stated. "But even then, I started out as a gladiator before I began my campaign. We both have started with nothing but will soon gain everything! It may take some time, and presumably a lot of patience, questioning my life, and having to cope with Starscream not being offline, but with my help, we shall subjugate this world and bring the threats to our power to their knees! We shall build a legacy that will not only span the Earth… but every inhabitant world across this omniverse, our names engraved in Decepticon history!"

"Alrighty then, so, wanna hunt down some snow ninjas?"

Drakus rushed beside Vader and sliced a vampire dressed in white full body ninja garb with an ice crystal symbol on the head crest, back and belt buckle in half with BlueBlaze, easily killing it. The ice vampire fell onto wet earth, as souls flowed into their new vessel in BlueBlaze. Like the others, this was not a Hollow, just another undead creature. With this area cleared, the squad walked back to the Bonfire away from a broken wagon, as Drakus sat down once it was lit. Warm liquid light poured itself into his Estus flask, refilling it. The Drakonian wondered what this new world held in its history.

There was no Darksign eclipse in the sky. This meant at the very least, traces of the Elden Ring did not exist here, other than the bonfire they sat next to. Yet, his sword was able to absorb souls of the undead he killed. Drakus stood up, walking away from the bonfire and continued down the path, slaying more of the vampiric ninjas. Drakus had to investigate that bright, falling meteor.

More were put to rest on the downward sloping path. Some would die through a backstab or good whacking, while others were killed with deep slices in their torso. While they too only gave little in the way of souls, Drakus was not going to complain about gaining more. Up ahead, he could see many corpses of the zombie ninjas. They were covered in burns and slash marks, all caused by a group of officers the squad also spotted. These cops were protecting the entrance to a town, of which the Drakus saw at Overlook Road. At least, that is what the bonfire whispers had called this checkpoint. The squad went into a full sprint, moving towards a newly risen group of Yukinjas.

Officer Darius Rumford blew the head off the Yukinja standing in front of him. Officers behind him continued firing bullets at more undead further ahead, rising from the ground. He wondered if there would be any end to these consecutive waves. Rumford told his officers to keep up their volleys, mitigating the amount moving closer to the gate. After running an undead through with his baton, he looked to his right. Rumford only saw a band of diverse characters, sprinting down the dirt road, as well as a girl with ice-blue hair and eyes heading their way on a motorcycle, wearing a charcoal jacket with two black zig-zag stripes, a white undershirt and a red tie with a purple vest, as well as a black skirt and black shoes with low heels, as well as metallic jewellery on both of her sleeves and her index and ring fingers, as well as a lizard-like beast clad in red and gold carrying a shotgun and a girl wearing a simple blue coat, with golden clasps like marching band uniform, atop a navy blue tank top with matching loose fit trousers and gray steel toed boots. The entire ensemble was topped off with a spiked shoulder pad, a belt with a thigh strap and a single fingerless glove with an armor plate on the back. Their armor had no insignia on cloth or by etching.

The girl moved to stab a Yukinja in the neck with a sickle, bringing it out of its right jugular. The girl continued the momentum, spinning to cut the left side. Its head spun in the air, rolling for a moment before stopping on the foot of another ninja. That Yukinja was shot in the head by a bullet, then another one to the chest. When combat had settled, a figure walked towards the Ashen One. He wore leather boots with an overcoat, hiding most of the shirt on his body. A blue clawed gauntlet went with his armor. The two moved to speak.

"I have not seen any other militia besides my own and Blue Boy here. Thanks for the assist, stranger." The dragon man said.

The Ashen One nodded in agreement, then responded. "I would have helped anyway. The people were being attacked by the undead." She motioned her sickle to the charred, cut bodies of the Yukinjas.

"Live in fear, people of Sync City. How I pity them, those who have had the misfortune of becoming the prey of Razoff the hunter!" The lizard creature said.

There was a slight rumble in the ground, hinting at another wave. Roman heard an archer from behind say to their superior, "Captain! More Yukinjas are approaching, and the person leading them's here!"

Roman sighed, muttering, "What's new…" in response. The squad stood next to the Ashen One, watching more undead slowly digging themselves out of the dirt. Most of the Yukinjas in this group were skinny as always, while others were just crawling torsos.

"So let me get one thing clear," the girl said, excitement vibrating through her voice, "I'll absolutely sign up for this group thing you got, but only if I get to prove to you that I belong here by beating up the thing running this army."

Drakus coughed. "Yes, that does work, Lightning Bug."

"Noted!" The girl grinned, already cracking her knuckles and focusing on the Yukinjas.

"You don't want a weapon?" Drakus asked mildly. "I can provide one if you want."

The girl... paused.

"If I needed someone else's weapon," she finally provided, "I'd be a piss-poor example of invincibility, now wouldn't I?"

"Eh, maybe," Drakus said, shrugging.

"Do I get to ask the one leading this on a date if it's a girl?" The girl asked curiously. "It's not like I wouldn't ask anyway, but incentive besides a fight is nice..."

Soon, the squad started ripping and tearing through the Yukinjas, eventually finding the person making the Yukinjas, a woman with light gray skin, grayish mulberry-colored lipstick, and brilliant violet eyes. Her hair was two tones with a dark purple base and very pale blue bangs, while her large, pointed, low-angled pigtails that resembled clouds. On her face, she had jagged black face paint that surrounded her eyes and came down to her cheeks as lightning bolts.

She wore a muted-color purple and blue two-piece jacket with a white lightning cloud in the center, black pants, white gloves with two of the lightning bolts above her elbows. The squad, Razoff, Vader and the Ashen One chose their targets.

Karlo charged at the Yukinja in front of him, killing it with a left horizontal strike. Mystle on the other hand grabbed a Yukinja by the throat. Her spear pierced through bone. Its body was then forced backward as Mystle pulled the spear out, covered in snow. Then, one crawling Yukinja grasped Razoff's leg, intending to break it. The hunter simply brought his shotgun down as a stab to its wrist, then severed it. While souls were absorbed as Drakus' foot crushed bone, the teal-haired girl looked towards Drakus, who leapt up to a tower to be face to face with the girl clad in purple.

"Yo, Freezy. What's with all the terrorizing?" The girl clad in blue and gold said, leaping after Drakus. "Why don't ya pick on someone your own size, skill and/or temperature?"

"Seriously?! Do you always start with a joke?" Rasticore asked, cringing at the joke.

"Not always! Besides, her joke is definitely claw-some!" Drakus said, laughing while the new recruits on the X-Squad just groaned or facepalmed.

The girl then bridged her nose, groaning as if she heard that joke before, her umbrella holstered to a scabbard. "I swear this is deja vu, and my name is not Freezy! It's Stormy Weather, weather tech extraordinaire!" Stormy Weather snapped.

"Wait, you're a crook, with that get up?! You know how dangerous some folk are, and how gaudy you look?!" Drakus realized.

"Blot offered me a deal I couldn't refuse! My father's weather tech deserves to be funded and developed! And I will start with frying you and taking Sukuna's fingers!"

"Listen, I'm feeling rather chill today, so how about calling this possible coup d'état, okay?" Drakus asked, as Stormy Weather frowned, facepalmed, and unholstered her umbrella, which quickly opened, as the wind picked up and sent Drakus flying into the ground after crashing into the snow a couple times, and just when it couldn't get weirder, twenty wrinkly fingers fell into Drakus' mouth, the Prince accidentally swallowing them.

"Oh, that's not good." Stormy Weather said, realizing that Drakus basically ate all of Sukuna's fingers, and now, she's so in trouble.

---

Ryoumen Sukuna looked unsurely at his new vessel.

"What do you think you are doing, brat?" The strongest curse in the history of mankind asked stiffly.

When the brat charged at him, Sukuna was sure that his vessel was just another foolish sorcerer who thought that he could take on the king of curses just because he could somehow contain his power.

He expected a fight. He expected a fist or a kick to be thrown at him.

He didn't expect the brat to glomp him out of the blue.

"I have been waiting for so long! You're finally here!" The odd dragon brat said with a sniff.

...What?

"Sukuna, you're part of my collection now, aren't you? I am going to cherish you forever! I can't believe I accidentally downed some stupid fingers just to finally be able to meet you!" Drakus said tearfully while rubbing his cheek against Sukuna like a cat.

The king of curses stared at his vessel and internally started freaking out once he saw Drakus' cursed energy levels, and they were off the fucking scale.

What Kenjaku had done, was incarnate him into a monster worse than him.

"Get the hell off me before I slice your head off, brat." The double-faced specter threatened menacingly, trying not to let this literal demon see that he was scared.

Megatron facepalmed in sync with Ozpin and Vholran. "Oh, for Primus' sake..." "Oh dear..." "What have we possessed?"

When the brat finally decided to get off him, he seemed to notice something and frowned.

"Hey, what happened to my inner world? It is not like this before." Drakus said in confusion while taking a look at his surroundings.

"That can't be comfortable." the Drakonian mused out loud, motioning to Sukuna's throne that was made out of bones.

In the next second, his domain was overtaken by the brat's energy. The Malevolent Shrine disappeared and a sprawling throne of throw pillows replaced it. The sea of blood turned into a literal fucking cloud.

Sukuna would never admit it out loud but the demon did catch him off guard. Did this kid manage to overtake his domain so easily like that?

A snowflake then fell on his nose.

Ryoumen Sukuna closed his eyes and sighed to himself before he settled down underneath a blanket.

He would allow this because the snowflake was pretty. Nothing less and nothing more.

He twitched when the boy invited himself to sit beside Sukuna.

"I can't wait to show you off to everyone, imagine the power we'll have over those who face us!" Drakus said with a laugh.

"Brat. Shut up and leave before I make you." Sukuna said ominously.

Drakus tilted his head to a side before he snapped his fingers in understanding. "Ah! I get it! You are the grumpy old man type who needs his peaceful nap so that you will be less grumpy to everyone, right?"

Sukuna wordlessly sent a Dismantle and sliced his own neck off to try and escape. It didn't work...at all.

---

The Drakonian soon got up, and stomped on another crawling torso, crushing its head just like the ice-haired girl. Drakus nodded to the girl clad in blue and gold, who held her own better than himself. Both went back towards killing Yukinjas, while the squad covered what they could not focus on. With the Ashen One at the police's side, they destroyed an advancing wave of undead in several seconds, as Stormy Weather tried to teleport away, only for her foot to be grabbed by the blue and gold girl, who literally dragged her down to the ground and kissed her, Stormy Weather blushing deeply and babbling gibberish. Even though Officer Rumford had been present, he was nowhere near Drakus' level of prowess. They walked back towards the wooden gate together, with Rumford beginning the conversation once more.

"I have never seen anyone fight like that before." The Captain said.

"Well, you did see me step on someone." the girl clad in blue and gold replied. "Got some inspiration, I take it."

Rumford almost smiled at the response, then said something to his fellow cops. "Alright boys! Open the gate for these folk. Unless you have other travel plans?" He turned to the squad and Ashen One, waiting for a response.

"Do you happen to know anything about that bright, falling object from the sky?" The girl asked.

"The Fallen Star? It fell on the former mayor's office in this city, after it was condemned thanks to holding lots of mutants." Rumford responded, "There wasn't anyone in attendance, thankfully."

"That is…fortunate." Vader said. "Where is the nearest Imperial Outpost?"

Rumford laughed. "You mean the nearest rest stop, that's easy, Tom's Diner, If there is anyone who has seen the Fallen Star's crater up close, it would be Cheri Henderson."

The Sith thanked Rumford. Yet before the girl could pass the gates, Drakus asked a question.

"Hey, do you have a name?" Drakus said.

The Ashen One stopped, then said, "Mallory Thaelana, Malthael for short." She kept walking.

The girl clad in blue and gold eyed Rumford for a moment, shrugged mentally and took a theatrical bow. "Name's Ramiel de la Vallière. Technically. Just call me Ramiel. The last name isn't technically official."

'Ah, Malthael, that's the Angel of Death's name, Ramiel's an angel name too.' Rumford thought. 'Anyone would recognize that.' He looked towards what rotted bodies were added to their latest massacre. 'Considering how those two cut them down so easily…At this point, I'm willing to bet that they're actually angels.'

Rumford looked at one of his cops and ordered him to burn the unmoving bodies. "You there, light these things up, fast." The cop nodded, while another one joined seconds later. Cops on both towers covered their fellow militia on the ground as it happened. The Captain watched as well, making sure his people were safe. Away from Rumford, the squad got to walking.

The group halted near a wagon, filled with slain Yukinjas. Beside it was a cop, carrying each body to a large pit of burning corpses. He heard one man with a shield remind the other about those bodies.

"Burn those corpses before they rise again!" The SWAT officer said.

Yet right after, a Yukinja woke from the wagon, only for an axe to slam through skull and brain tissue, as well as multiple black spinks resembling ink. Souls entered the Ashen One's form as it died. She then hauled its body by the leg, bringing it over to the ignited corpse pit. The cop near this fire nodded to him, then moved to grab another risen from their stationed wagon. As Mallory tossed the kill into the flame, bodies crumpled.

The Ashen One turned to look at what happened. Moving closer, she spotted a useful item that can be applied later. It was an undead bone shard, meant to be cast into a fire. This would increase complexity within a bonfire's light, allowing for greater physical recovery. While the shard is from a different world, it was still found through an undead creature. Therefore, it should be applicable for use. The Ashen One grabbed the undead bone shard, then continued walking to find Tom's Diner.

"Well, Drak, guess I need to work on my aim."

The one who said that was a man, wearing a blue cowl over his brown hair, as he stood up, the squad saw that he wore orange goggles and some sort of mouth guard, and he had two mismatched hatchets strapped to his pants.

"Toby, what the fuck?" Drakus asked, giving the new arrival a look.

Toby stood up giving a small twitch. "Hey!" He said giving a hyperactive wave. "I've been trying to get into this world to find out what Slendy was hiding."

Drakus shook his head. "Well, might as well get introductions out of the way, everyone, this is Ticci Toby."

Ticci Toby looked at the squad, before twitching violently, as his neck cracked loudly, making Sabrina jump in shock. "A buncha newbies? Sweet, I'm no longer the new guy."

"Um, hi." Powder said to the boy who kept twitching every few seconds. "I'm Powder Lane."

"Nice to meet you, as Drak said, I'm Ticci Toby." Toby said with another twitch.

"Toby is one of the insane Creepypastas, slang for those blessed by the Crypt Gods." Drakus explained. "He's pretty harmless for the most part unless you're one of his victims, but if he's curious about something, he'll do anything to satisfy it."

Mystle turned to see a teenage girl with brunette hair wearing a white sleeveless shirt and a blue coat over it along with dark blue jeans, who was pointing a knife at her.

Mystle realized who this was as soon as she saw the watch for the eye.

"Clockwork, I think?" Mystle asked, causing the girl to look at the dream demon in surprise.

"How do you know me?" Clockwork asked cautiously, not underestimating her.

"Well you got a clock for an eye." Mystle gave a shrug. "So it was pretty much a guess."

"Huh, and here I thought you were another unlucky kid that got lost." Clockwork muttered as she sheathed her two knives into the straps on her pants. "Jeff told me that we had intruders here, and Slender had me assigned to take care of you."

"Now it makes sense." Drakus shook his head, deciding he didn't want to ask about the 'another unlucky kid'. "He's pissed that his attempt to make me 'go to sleep' failed."

"Before we get going. What did you do to get on this 'Jeff' person's bad side?" Weiss asked.

"Snowflake, he forgot plates when he was making a giant pile of spaghetti, and it needed more sauce and meatballs, it was so wrong, and ol' Jeffy's still mad I called him out on that atrocity." Drakus bluntly stated. "And also because I am a complete and unbridled menace; discomfort is my amphetamine, and I indulge in it like a Wehrmacht conscript who just learned he's getting shipped off to Stalingrad."

Clockwork chuckled at imagining that. "That explains a few things."

"So, you use knives?" Aria asked, surprised at someone who basically fought with only kitchen knives.

Clockwork raised a brow in question. "You're a Slasher? I figured you had some sort of ability like Sally considering your small stature."

"I like to keep it simple," Aria answered. "Torture devices are exciting at first, but all you really need is a handful of blades and some practice. And doing it yourself is so much more...intimate."

Clockwork saw how tense Aria was and smirked. "You know being paranoid can be bad for you, right?"

"Well, considering you almost had a knife to Mystle's throat a minute ago, I think we have a right to be paranoid." Aria gave a shrug. "Plus, we're all maniacs, warriors, even some demons and angels, so why shouldn't I have my guard up?"

"Well I think we're even considering what happened was a misunderstanding and you nearly broke my nose." Clockwork said making a mental note to prank Jeff for this. "I'm actually one of the tame killers around here, as long as you don't screw me over."

First, the squad passed a wandering scholar who said very little to them. Then, another man they saw told the squad and Lord of Hollows briefly about his religion.

"Zakarum has fallen to disgrace…" Brother Malachi said. "What faith can save us now? It is the end of the world; can't you see that?"

Razoff simply chuckled. "It is only the end, when faith is gone."

After ending the conversation with Malachi, the squad saw another individual with a shovel. Mallory only waved at him, while the other person gave this same gesture. She understood this was a merchant, yet had no currency to give. The Ashen One traded souls instead of coins, so she had no money on her.

"Bloody heck, why did that...admittedly cute...girl grab me?!" Stormy Weather said, glaring at Ramiel as Drakus stopped by the man holding a shovel, basically buying everything the man had.

"I do hope we didn't startle you," Jafar said as if that fact wasn't plain. "You and Drakus were having such a nice conversation when you first met, if you don't count the fact you sent him flying into the snow after he told some jokes, that I figured he's planning on continuing it in some diner."

Stormy Weather's mouth hung open, unsure of what she should say. "Uh, yeah, of course. Umm...maybe it'll involve apple cider?"

Jafar rubbed the bridge of his nose in exasperation and sighed. "It is not safe to consume any apple products at an event in which the dragon's dream demon friend, who I still fear is the old hag in a younger form, is in attendance. By Allah, you're like Drakus in many ways, and you'll need me to watch you like a hawk so that you don't get yourself killed."

"Oh, no, that's alright," Stormy Weather said. "If there's one thing I'm good at, among other things, it's being quick on my feet."

"Nonsense," Jafar said as he wrapped his arm around Stormy Weather's shoulder. "We have much to discuss! Did you know... Drakus reminds me of my former pet parrot."

As he said that, a pair of inky black hands were making their way around Drakus from behind. Literally inky; they were dripping black goo. The hands suddenly tightened around his throat, pulling him back against the wall, as their owner's moon-pale face rose up behind him, framed by a multicolored mess of hair that was admittedly quite expressive. Contrary to her terrifying exterior, she was wearing a white shirt adorned with childish doodles and overalls.

"What's your favorite idea?" she asked, singsong, in a pleasant British accent. "Mine is revenge on charlatans! You know how I get the idea? It arrives when I look at the charlatan. Take a look at this Drakus Hydrax! He needs a special lesson after school!"

"P-Paige – " Drakus croaked. "So good to see you again?"

"I'm a work of art, and you skipped my class," this person, Paige, insisted. "It very nearly tore me apart. I think I should take YOU apart!"

Then, all of a sudden, she let him go. "But that's in the past, and luckily, my murderous plans go to back-burner pans."

"Dare I ask what the story is here?" Vexen sighed.

Drakus rubbed at his neck. Not that it would've done anything to harm him anyway; it just hurt. "Paige had a class with me back in the day, but she, much like that freaky Ayeka chick, refused to leave me be, so I tried to escape her…with the help of a deadly poison and several sharp blades." He sighed. "But she's already dead, and even harder to wipe off the board than me."

"Drakus has found someone new?" Paige tilted her head, looking at Taeko, Lute, Vaati and Vaizen. "Am I to assume that that someone is you four?"

"You know it." Taeko told her. "And me, Lute, Vaizen and Vaati ten times the lover you'd ever be. If you want to fight about it, then I'm raring and ready!"

"Now you, I think I like," Paige said. "If you want, make the first move."

"Not now." Taeko waved it off. "We're all having a nice time and we ain't ready to make a scene yet."

Drakus' hand wrapped around Paige. "Paige is a demon, almost like Blackheart, Daki, Gyutaro, even Exmun," he said, "though she wasn't always. In the world she's from, she was a teacher, and she looked a lot stranger than this."

"Stranger than THAT?" Krell said in disbelief. "How could she possibly – no, wait, I don't want to know, do I?"

Without so much as a warning, Paige suddenly was a different shape entirely. Vexen thought she'd just disappeared until he heard the "Hello!" from the floor. She was now a generously-sized notepad with a face drawn on, her hair in the form of yarn that spilled from the seam of her pages.

"I once taught creativity!" Paige proclaimed. "But that wasn't quite the job I hoped for. Three students went rogue, and I got the blame for all their gory ideas! First I was retired, then met the capital punishment. I got sent to Hell, and there, I said 'Screw it all!'." She was humanoid again. "I got a new body, a new bag of tricks, and the bestest friend I ever could think of!"

Akira was staring at Paige, a blush on her face.

Lune sighed. "Yeah, should probably have seen that coming."

"Oh for… Are you serious?! She literally said she killed people!" Hajime asked in disbelief. "You never had a crush on Samara Morgan, did you?"

Akira's blush deepened. "Um."

Zone stared at her blankly, with a grin on her face. "…You have really good taste."

"I can't help who or what I like!" Akira cried shrilly.

"What is a…Samara Morgan?" A confused Zant asked, as he was saying this, he started to twist his body in a very…bizarre way.

"Uh…." Mera could only stare at him.

"What in the…" Pomni whispered while Jason could only just stare at him, tilting his head in bewilderment.

"The villain from The Ring," Satsuki said.

"Ah." There was a pause, as Zant untwisted his body and started doing a twirl behind Kenji, finishing the twirl a rather flamboyant pose. "That explains nothing."

"It means she's now part of Akira's harem! Congratulations!" Mozu cheered, hugging the even more bewildered eldritch abomination, who gained a pronounced blush on her face.

"Um, what's going on?" Paige whimpered as Mozu kept hugging her, causing Akira to turn even redder.

"Well, you get used to it," Krell said, utterly exhausted.

"Okay so. To be completely blunt, my family, the de la Vallières, is kinda like this X-Squad group you got going on, incredibly large, incredibly complex, and we're all idiots with a penchant for higher order mathematics, which by the way, my family's totally owning by the way, mass destruction, which both our groups have in common, and we all play off each other like a house on fire because apparently every time one of us does something stupid, half the rest of us join in because we think it'd be fun, which somehow we both share, and I'm part of a race of beings called Angels- no, not literal heavenly angels, it's just the name," Ramiel started, tenting her fingers as she looked out over the squad. "We're also adding new members to it every now and then so if anyone wants to marry into the family we're totally cool with that. Just so you know."

Louise facepalmed. "ADAM help me, if you're doing this on purpose-" she paused. "Wait. Who the fuck is ADAM and why do I swear by them?"

"The progenitor, of course," Ramiel answered, leaning down and resting her chin on Louise's head with a small smile, breathing deeply and enjoying the scent of Louise's strawberry scented hair. "Though why you're swearing by the progenitor I don't know. Weren't you swearing by some Brimir person before?"

Louise frowned. "I was." She felt troubled. "...am I changing? Is that what's happening?"

"We'd love you anyway," Jinx added. "Who knows, you might even start not blowing up anyone who triggers your breast envy!"

Louise closed her eyes and sighed loudly. Then she pointed her wand at Jinx and wished for a minor explosion.

True to form, the explosion that occurred was neither minor nor an explosion, but rather a blast of heat and wind that ended with a rather predictable result. Ramiel whistled lowly, blinking and blatantly staring at Jinx's now disheveled body with an appreciative gaze.

"I once thought human bodies were gross," she murmured, a slight grin forming on her face. "But that? That's pretty nice."

Jinx blushed deeply. "Whaaaaaaaaaahhhh, Louise! How forward of you, ruffling my clothes so early!"

Louise sighed. "Jinx, stop, we'll have our...fun...later. Ramiel, stop ogling girls that aren't me or Jinx."

She froze. "...wait, did I say that out loud?"

Drakus saw another being right away, rising up behind Vexen. It was Mystle who didn't notice him at first, and the dream demon's blood ran when she heard "Time makes us fools. It's time that you wasted. These times have changed and it's time that you face it."

He was tall, slender, his skin a bright blue and his hair shaggy and dark. Across his face was spread a strange marking of red – clock hands whose connecting point was on his nose. He wore a classy black coat and a colorful bow tie.

"Well, he's handsome," Drakus remarked.

"Like my chum, this body is new," the strange man said. "Is this bizarre enough for the lot of you?"

And then, again without warning, he was a clock. A normally wall-mounted model, except with uncannily bendy arms and legs. The blue was the color of his face, and the red clock hands were now literal. He did a little dance on the spot.

"I was a teacher much like dear Paige," the clock explained. "Then they ruled that I should be removed from the stage. All I wanted to do was teach about time, with quaint little lessons and rhymes, but some don't appreciate the raw demonstration. I aged three to death, which sunk me further. They sent me to Hell, and I met my chum. Hell's paradise; wouldn't want to be above it. While Drakus has been out, I joined with his flock." He bowed. "And that is the story of Tony the Clock."

Mystle clapped. "Oh, that's truly wicked, these two have such a vile streak to them!"

In an instant, Tony was human again. Humanoid, anyway. He still stood on the back of the seat, but backflipped off, taking a bow as he did so.

"Okay, robots. My name is Drakus Hydrax, Prince of Drakonia, and these are my friends over there, the X-Squad." Drakus explained, handing the yellow bot a list of names. "We don't mean you any harm. We are a nice group of folk. Mostly."

"Just don't cross us, and you'll be fine." Roman explained.

"Who are you?" Drakus asked.

Two of the bots stared at the group.

"Well, we're not Little Richard and Tommy Kirk, if that's what you're thinking." The gumball machine bot explained.

"We're the Bots from the Satellite of Love." the yellow bot said.

"Is that the ship's name?" Drakus said, before grinning. "Cool."

"Uh, actually, we were wondering if you have names," Roman said.

"Oh. Gypsy? Give them the Robot Roll Call." Tom said as he turned towards the purple robot, apparently named Gypsy.

Gypsy nodded as she opened her mouth, and a clipboard slid out into Razoff's hands, as the hunter stared at it.

"Cambot?" Razoff blinked as he was reading the Robot Roll Call.

The small floating camera buzzed.

"Gypsy?" Razoff said.

"Oh my stars!" Gypsy, the purple robot with a snake-like appearance, said.

"Tom Servo?" Razoff read.

"Check me out!" Tom Servo, the gumball machine robot, said cockily.

"Crow?" Razoff read.

"I'm different!" Crow T. Robot, the yellow robot with Ping-Pong eyes and net on his head, said in glee.

Vader blinked as he nodded.

"Okay, it's nice to meet you all." Roman said.

"Okay, let's get down to business." Mystle said. "Even and Nushi wanna experiment on you for a bit, if that's fine with you."

"Do ANY of these experiments involve watching bad movies?" Tom asked.

The squad blinked as Vexen stared, confused. "Uh, no."

"Good! We can't stand bad movies after all we've gone through." Crow frowned.

"What movies do you mean?" Ariel asked.

"Oh, there was a WHOLE lot of crappy movies, we could name so many!" Tom said.

"The Crawling Eye, Mac and Me, The Beast of Hollow Mountain, Starcrash, The Sidehackers, Godzilla vs Megalon, Pod People..." Crow started.

"Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, Cry Wilderness, The Land That Time Forgot, Teen-Age Strangler, Monster A Go-Go, Atlantic Rim, The Killer Shrews, Avalanche, The Loves of Hercules, Devil Fish, Manos: The Hands of Fate..." Tom continued.

"Eegah, Mitchell, The Time Travelers, Operation Double 007, Lords of The Deep, The Brain That Wouldn't Die, Last of the Wild Horses, Danger: Death Ray..."

"Gamera vs Guiron, Yongary, Monster from the Deep, Teen-Age Crime Wave, The Wild Wild World of Batwoman, Wizards of the Lost Kingdom, Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II, The Green Slime, This Island Earth, Carnival Magic, The Day Time Ended, Laserblast, Beyond Atlantis, The Christmas That Almost Wasn't, The Deadly Mantis, Reptilicus, The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies..."

"Prince of Space, At the Earth's Core, The Horror of Party Beach, The Batwoman, Godzilla vs Gigan, Invaders from the Deep, Killer Fish, Time Chasers, I Accuse My Parents, The Pumaman, Hobgoblins..."

"The Final Sacrifice, Demon Squad, Time Chasers, Ator, Quest of the Delta Knights, Soultaker, Diabolik, The Christmas Dragon..."

"And tons..."

"And tons..."

"AND TONS of shorts!" Crow and Tom finished at the same time.

"Yay." Gypsy said.

The squad just stared in surprise.

"Wow..." Lawton said.

"Yeah... wow." Tom nodded.

The squad continued walking, then spotted a post with two signs. One had the shape of a building, while the other had a door. 'Tom's Diner' was written on the bigger sign. To the right was a closed chest. The left had covered wagons and an old summoning circle. The Ashen One would worry about those later.

Mallory opened the door, walking into the building. It was the inn that the captain had talked about. Within there were available seats, sacks of grain, food, drinks, and other patrons. However, what he couldn't ignore was nine individuals all in one section, murmuring about something. Four on the ground, while five stuck to the booth. The healthier patrons whispered their gossip to each other, judging the unknown girl and the squad. Mallory ignored them and looked towards the bar to see 4 young girls.

"Get, OUT!" the small blackette, Scarlett Louise Jones, yelled.

Drakus stiffened in place, refusing to dignify the rudeness by turning around. "I'm not gonna get out," he stated, miffed to be interrupted. "I just got here!" With a defiant toss of his rainbow locks, he turned to face the one who'd been so obnoxious-and instead found himself nose-to-freckled-nose with an old friend. The tiny girl with the big voice shuffled over to let Drakus have a seat.

"No, I didn't mean 'get out' get out," Scar Lo explained, inviting Drakus to sit beside her. "I meant, 'get out,' oh swell no! As in, believe the hype. As in, Drak, you're back, and your hair really is-"

"Now, since we're already here…" Katz murmured.

Cajun Fox was already headed towards the kitchen. "We might as well settle in and get right at home!"

"Good idea. I shall look for le silverware," Le Quack chuckled, waddling over to the nearby waitress, then he pulled out a mallet, conking her on the head. "Or le deed to the diner. Or jewelry. Pay me no mind."

"No problem," Black Puddle Queen smirked, lounging in her puddle portal as she watched Drakus pull up a menu. "I think you need to let him breathe to live," she mused with her silky sea voice. "Of course, I live underwater. I don't know how important air is."

"What'll it be, mademoiselles?" Le Quack had asked, pulling a pen from his hair to jot down their order.

The girl with brown hair, Opaline Trudeau, was about to order when the black redhead, Cheri Henderson, spoke over her. "Strawberry milkshake, please."

"Butterbeer!" Scarlett shouted, banging her fist on the table. "And don't skimp on the caramel sauce." Then she took a long slug of her water.

The duck arched an eyebrow at her.

"And I'd like the triple-berry parfait," the purplette, Iris Grace Taylor, said, though it was hard to choose from all the sweet options on the menu.

"How about you?" Le Quack asked Opal, who shrunk back in the corner of the booth, disturbed by the sight of the duck.

"Looks like you could use a stiff butterbeer, too, same as your jittery little friend here." Cajun Fox said.

"Oh, no thank you," Opal said, so softly that the duck had to hop onto the table to hear. "Just hot chocolate for me," Opal squeaked. "With Mister Marshmallows. I mean mini marshmallows!" the girl corrected herself, blushing.

"And one camomile tea." Vexen needed to stay calm.

"Same with me," the other girl at the table said.

"Surprise me and the squad." Drakus said.

"Got it," Le Quack said, waddling over to the kitchen: "Pink in a Blender, le Harry Classic, heavy on le sauce, Three in le Snow, and Polar Bears Swim Lake Cocoa. Plus camomile tea for le father and mother, and whatever else they got for le offbrand Cirque du Soleil."

"Dad?!" Vexen spluttered as the duck walked away. "I hardly look like I'm sane enough to be your father!"

"I still hardly look like I'm old enough to be your mom!" Between the funny food names and Candice and Vexen's shock, the girls and Drakus burst out laughing all over again. Scarlett covered her nose with her napkin to keep from snorting out water.

Furina, in her infinite wisdom, resorted to sticking her tongue out at the duck in petty defense of Vexen's honor.

Starscream's eyes went wide for a moment and tilted his head. "Excuse me, what the scrap was that?"

"Aww, did the cold get to you too?" Furina held the back of her hand against Starscream's forehead, looking extra bratty. "Poor baby, you look like you're running a cold, hehe~" Furina quickly felt hands against her cheeks as Neo moved closer to her mouth. She felt a blush creep across her face, thinking she was about to be kissed. It wouldn't be the first time Neo kissed her to shut up her bratty behavior.

"Open your mouth." Opal seemingly demanded. Furina let out a small squeak and parted her lips ready to be kissed. Only to feel Opal's thumbs trying to pry her mouth more open. She flailed and pushed back enough to break free, as lightning swirled around her.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" She screeched, her face still red, both from embarrassment and desire.

"Show me your tongue!" Opal yelled, her eyes turning storm gray as Furina saw lightning emanating from her as a storm appeared in the diner, and looked to be ready to pounce again.

"What?! Why?!" Furina prepared for more hand to... mouth... combat.

"It's blue!" Cheri looked both concerned and fascinated.

Furina looked bewildered as the X-Squad looked bamboozled. "Yeah! Did you just now notice?!" Drakus said.

"I don't make it a habit to watch people's taste servos! Now show me!" Starscream jumped forward, trying to see this anomaly more.

Furina held her hands out and stopped the assault. "OK, OK, JUST CEASE!" At that, Opal and Starscream moved back, Opal's eyes turning back to brown as she stared on the Archon's mouth intently.

Furina and Neo had done a lot together, more than Furina had ever done with anyone else in over 500 years. Yet in this moment, she felt really embarrassed. She opened her mouth slightly and stuck out her tongue a bit. Neo was enthralled. The color was quite vibrant, the end of it being a very pretty bright blue with it turning more darker the closer it got to the base. It reminded her of blueberry ice cream. It always captivated her, and she always thought it was cute. Soon, Furina put her tongue back in her mouth and looked away, pouting a bit.

"So that's your field report?" asked an oddly young female voice on the phone Akko whipped out.

"Are you gonna do the whole recap thing again?"

"You broke into the house,"

"Yup." Akko said.

"And shot him seventy-five times in the chest,"

"Eighty-four. Had to make sure he's dead." Drakus said.

"...there are so many things wrong with that sentence, but moving on. Then Ms. Yanson-"

"Starbright." Drakus said.

"Shot his partner."

"While raging about Nightfall. I think her eyes are finally turning back to normal color." Akko said.

Lotte looked confused over her surroundings. "What just happened, and why does it feel like I've been screaming for the last five minutes?"

"Anyways Akko, you have an assignment at the Old Tristram ruins. A vampire took over and summoned an army of ghouls that are stocking up on mutagen."

"Oooo, can we find a pot of gold while we're there?"

"Akko."

"Come on! Inflation hasn't treated anybody nicely, so the extra funds would be nice."

"Just go and bring Lotte and Sucy with you."

"Yes, Diana," said Akko in a mockingly playful tone.

The Ashen One replied, "We are here to investigate the Falling Star, as your people call it. The captain out front told me that it fell into the former mayor's office." He waited for her to reply.

"That...was because the mayor was colluding with Devlon Louder to take over Sync City." Cheri said hesitantly. "How much do you know about it?"

"Only that the dead aren't in the dirt anymore," Mera replied. Yet, Mallory knew better. Another celestial body falling from the heavens, only to awaken dead people? That could possibly be Tyrael again, but the problem was that Tyrael was mortal when they last met. The Ashen One waited for her response.

"Then you only know what I've been trying to understand." Cheri said. "You would think that a star from the heavens would be a great thing. Yet, it's the opposite."

Mallory was in agreement with her. Ever since the First Flame brought her back to Sanctuary, it had been fairly quiet. She would kill wildlife for their meat, along with absorbing whatever smidgen of souls they had. This would only be interrupted by what she used to call a meteor. Then, Mallory was stuck slaying undead. The squad waited for Cheri to continue speaking.

Dropping all pretense of manners, Vader raised a threatening finger towards the only five civilians in his vision. "You will tell me where this Fallen Star is, and I will deal with whoever is responsible for this mockery of the Empire's strength." he announced to them, conveying that any attempt to conceal information would be met with severe consequences.

Iris raised a brow in utter confusion, Drakus' mind was overcome by an intense need to protect these girls, and while a tiny part of Vader would have found it admirable, considering who he was and what reputation he had, the Sith Lord wanted answers.

"Okay, look!" Cheri raised her hands in an effort to calm the situation down. "It fell on the outskirts of town near the former mayor's house. Whatever that star did brought you here by accident, and now, as you can see, there's a blizzard spreading across the city and the dead are walking." she explained, as if this would make sense to Vader.

The Sith Lord knew that there was some difference in terminology here, so he did his best to make sense of the young girl's words. This sounded like the work of a Sith Lord, most likely specializing in necromancy and in meteorokinesis. A powerful individual, and a great threat to the Empire if Vader or the Emperor were to make an enemy of him. Unfortunately for this Sith Lord, there could only be two…

---

"Either Dr. Forester came back...or we brought back a dragon." Maxx, TV's Son of TV's Frank, said dumbstruck at the new form of Dr. Forrester.

Indeed, what came out of the tube was Dr. Forester...only he looks like a combination of Diablo when he was the only Abyss-rank Yokai and himself, while dressed in his usual green lab coat, with a sharp tail, claws for fingernails, demonic wings, and his skin being more ashen in complexion, his eyes being a swirling mass of colors, his pants now being deep silver and having black dress boots. He breathed in, and laughed madly.

"Hey, kiddies! Dr. F's back in action!" Dr. Forester exclaimed as bolts of lightning appeared. He looked at his body, then frowned. "And what the hell am I anyway? I recalled fusing with that dragon thingy earlier..."

"Dad, get down here!" Kinga exclaimed, as Dr. Forester turned and saw...a person that he never thought that he would see, along with two other men, who Dr. Forester thought were gone forever.

Clayton Forester sighed. "Oh... hello, Kinga."

"Hey, Clay!" Frank smiled. "Good to see you again."

Clayton Forester gave a smile. "Good to see you too, Frank, but... didn't you die and go to that Second Banana Heaven place?"

"Eh, I decided to come back to life. It got boring being dead, so here I am." Frank smiled.

"Hello, Dr. Forester, sir." Dr. Erhardt glared at Clayton. "I heard you replaced me...twice!"

"Oh... didn't you get the memo I gave you the minute I hired Frank?" Clayton said as he turned to Erhardt.

"Apparently not!" Erhardt said, shocked. "You just REPLACED me out of the blue!"

"Yeah, I had to make some cutbacks..." Clayton sighed as he then turned to his daughter. "So... how did the experiments go without me around?"

"Well, your mother recruited us, she had Mike and the bots for three years then she accidentally pushed the Satellite of Love down, freeing them, than your daughter took over, the new guy got eaten, her and Frank's son got stuck in a theater, it was a whole thing, and then Lawgiver Kiko killed your mother and recruited us into some Deadlight thing." Professor Bobo explained as Brain Guy and Maxx nodded.

Kinga glared at Bobo as she facepalmed. "TMI, Bobo..."

Clayton frowned. "Monkeys? Guys with brains in pans? REALLY?"

"Hey, I don't question YOUR sidekicks, dad!" Kinga frowned.

Clayton muttered as he looked at the new form he had. "You could have resurrected me as a tyrannosaurus rex... but NO, I had to be reincarnated into this creepy thing!"

"Oh, shut it, you're back from the dead, dad, live with it!" Kinga retorted. "Anyway, now that EVERY Mad, old and new, well, not all of them, is here, there is a lot we need to discuss. For starters, Sync City!"

"Sync City?" Clayton blinked. "Is that where we are?"

"Indeed..." Megafin smiled. "And do you know what ALSO is in Sync City?"

"Er... apparently ninjas?" Frank asked, seeing that Yukinjas were bowing to Clayton, seeing him as an Abyss-rank Yokai.

"Besides that." Cinder said. "There's an artifact called the Black Soulstone. If we can collect all seven of the Black Soulstone's fragments, we'll be able to use them to our advantage."

"We'll also need to find the Terror Shisha." Mig added.

"Your terror what?" Dil asked.

"It's an enchanted waterpipe," Benglo explained, "and the only artifact in the universe capable of allowing one to smoke Fearcatnip, the source of our powers!"

"Fearcatnip? What in the universe is Fearcatnip?" Clayton asked.

"An herb composed of raw darkness that grew on our planet," Mig answered. "It is a great gift from the dark beyond planted by our ancestors. But foolish ideals of morality and domesticity caused the practice to become taboo, and war broke out between the Fearcats and the Royal Pride over that dispute."

"That's how I and the rest of our army got trapped in the mirror when we first arrived on Earth," Benglo added.

"Wait, your species is called Fearcats? That sounds pretty edgy." Clayton asked.

"You don't know anything about how Fearcats work, do you?" Benglo asked.

"A Fearcat is not a race in and of itself," Mig explained. "We are a type of Felicidaenian, but not a breed that is born or bred."

"A Fearcat is a Felicidaenian who has been corrupted by dark magic," Benglo added. "Though corrupted is such a strong word. I prefer to think of it as we were the ones who were brave and bold enough to embrace the true power of our people!"

"And you believe this Terror Shisha and the spellbook are somehow connected? How?" 2/3 asked.

"The markings on the cover of the book match the markings on the bowl of the shisha," Benglo answered.

"Hmmm..." Clayton paused. "An interesting shake-up... but why revive me?"

"Because you're good at inventions, and we needed a seventh player since Megafin, Birch, Kronos, Faith, J.D. and Guiron decided that they'll handle the other six." Mig explained. "Anyways... everyone up to this task, to find the Black Soulstone and Terror Shisha and use 'em to gain a leg up on everyone?"

"I'm game!" Bobo smiled as Frank nodded.

"All right, but only because..." Erhardt frowned.

"What the heck, I'll get to work on the invention to find the fragments right away!" Clayton said as he started to look around. "We just need a science lab..."

"Victoria's Shush might work, since Doctor O, Drakken, Spicer, Watts and Animo are already doing experiments in there..." Megafin frowned. "Use it."

"All right..." Clayton frowned.

"Oh, and while you're at it, try doing something like finding out how to hack a screen nearby where the bots are. We'll need to use that to taunt them!" Kinga said.

Clayton raised an eyebrow. "Wait... those robots are here too?"

"Yes... unfortunately, they are nowhere near a movie screen, but until we get them trapped in a spaceship where they DO have a movie screen, we'll have to make due with taunting." Kinga said. "Now, let's get to work!"

Clayton Forester nodded as the group resumed work.

---

"And so halfway through eating me out, the fucking girl passes out!"

"Can you...not...right now?"

"I mean, I still finished, but damn! Could've been a much better night."

"For goodness sakes, Maril. Think of mother!"

"...I ain't petting it right now."

The two girls were currently walking towards the mall. Maril was clad in a dark blue high-collared trenchcoat and dark blue pants, both of which had white trim, white gloves, silver sneakers, and a dark blue cap with a white-and-gold eye design on the front, while Merrill was clad in a white tailored suit and heeled boots, with their greenish-blonde hair was styled to mirror each other. While Merrill stood with her hands by her side, poised straight up, Maril had her hands in her pockets, taking a more relaxed pose. Overall, the two of them did not look suspicious at all.

"Oi, you two," said one of the Fanglar guards, stepping in front of them. "Sorry, but the grounds are closed today."

"Ah, shucks," said Maril, slumping her shoulders. "And we came all the way out here with these students on a field trip through West Virginia." Maril pointed to the charter bus parked horizontally across the road, the windows facing the front gate.

"Where they from?" asked the guard, slightly on guard.

Dozens of guns suddenly poked from the windows of the bus. Maril grinned.

"Florida."

At the snap of her fingers, all guns opened fire, tearing the guards and the gate apart. Their screams were quickly drowned out by the gunfire as smoke filled the air. When the guns stopped, only bodies and rubble remained.

"A mass shooting in West Virginia, a normal day in Florida," said Maril, smirking at the destruction.

Merrill facepalmed. "Humor aside, sister, prepare the ghouls. I'm going to find where they're hiding the beast able to kill Diana's pet. You overrun the rest of the mall."

"Got it, sis." Maril turned towards the bus. "Attention all rotten bastards! Off the bus and line up!"

Dozens of armored ghouls walked into formation, standing with glowing purple eyes, assault rifles, and shields.

"Our trip begins now! Remember your assignments: Look around, stick together, and kill anything that moves!"

---

Brain Guy paused as he looked towards J.D., as Maril and Merrill stalked into the mall, eyes widening in shock as they saw more Fanglars slaughtering the ghouls before surrounding them. "I have a bad feeling about this..."

"You think?! This ain't fair at all!" Maril snapped

"To put it bluntly, we don't give a fuck!" Kronos said.

"So, what's this idea you guys got, and whose this 'Boss Lady' that pale geek's referring to?" Clayton said.

Watts recoiled at the nickname. "Gah! "Boss Lady"? You would do well to show Lady Salem the respect she deserves!"

"On the contrary, Doctor." Salem assured. "I am perfectly fine with the title Spicer has chosen for me. So long as he continues to aid in our cause, he may call me whatever he likes."

Watts let out a sigh of defeat. "Very well, Lady Salem, if that is what you wish." He straightened his back and turned to the inventor. "And what of you? What can you bring to the proverbial table?"

"I am glad you asked." Clayton said, as he stepped forward and extended a hand. "Doctor Clayton Forester, mad scientist extraordinaire. I specialize in the field of inventions and cheesy movies."

Watts' eyebrows rose in surprise. "Hmm, well, it certainly is good to meet a fellow man of science." He extended his hand and shook Clayton's. "Doctor Arthur Watts, a pleasure. I specialize in robotics and engineering myself."

"Here is the requisition form for new guns and weapons for the troops," A high-ranking Fanglar said as he placed a scroll in Kingpin's hands.

Kingpin unrolled the scroll and studied it. "The bullets and guns are easily filled, but acquiring this much steel is going to require many steel factories being robbed at the very least. I can get you your request within the week, no more."

The Fanglar grinned. "Better than nothing. Make sure the boss knows we can't sustain an army without weapons!"

"She shall be made aware," Kingpin assured him. "Now off with you."

"What are you doing now?" Drakken asked with a sigh.

"Securing my new role amongst Deadlight," Kingpin answered. "As Smythe said, it was necessary that we evolve to stay relevant in the current regime. I have assumed the duties of the quartermaster of Deadlight. After all, the inherent power and necessity in controlling the supplies of our empire is one that ensures that the Kingpin remains a vital part of the team."

"You cannot simply declare yourself as quartermaster," Watts said with a sigh.

"And why not?" Kingpin asked. "I declared myself Kingpin long ago. If there is a position that I desire, I shall take it!"

"We functioned before without a formal quartermaster," Wuya pointed out. "How will anyone even know to bring their requisitions to you? You may have gotten to the soldiers but the others will not be so easily-"

"Excuse me," Ionix, a new, and rather draconic, recruit to Deadlight, interrupted as he flew into the lab, dragging Merrill along. "Me, pint size, and Frost Vark are looking for the quartermaster, and to talk about a new weapon I wanna get."

"You have come to the right place," Kingpin said after shooting Wuya an 'I told you so' expression. "Come with me. What exactly would interest you, my dear?"

As Kingpin led Merrill, Ionix and Frost Vark, a giant mole monster, over to a rack of various firearms and magical weapons he'd stocked up on, Smythe couldn't help but laugh a bit under his breath. For all his employer's hare-brained schemes, there was always a certain ingenuity to Kingpin that Smythe couldn't help but admire. At the very least, there was never a dull moment.

Hazel extended his hand to Maril, Satsuuki and Alexander, who looked down at it warily. "Greetings. I am Hazel Rainart. Forgive Doctor Watts, he can be quite the skeptic when it comes to new allies."

Alexander waved his hand. "It is no problem at all." The man grasped Hazel's hand and shook it. "Alexander of Macedonia, pleasure to meet you."

Hazel nodded. "A pleasure." His gaze then shifted over to Satsuuki and Maril. "And you?"

Satsuuki smirked and stepped forward, shaking hands with Hazel as well. "Well then, the name's Satsuuki Sakurae, pleased to meet you."

"So, name's Maril Cavendish, and let's just say, I'm a bit of a different breed." Maril said, grinning.

"I see." Hazel crossed his arms. "So, how were you two brought into the fold?"

"Oh, I was summoned by Malzen…" Alexander snapped his fingers a couple times. "And due to some magic, I got stuck in this body, and I have made use of it."

"See, cuz has a pet vampire, and it killed Mama, and me and big sis Merrill kinda turned into vampires to get even with said vampire." Maril said.

"Well, I was in some 'hentai game' as Kronos said, and now I'm making the most of it," Satsuuki added, "And man, if it helps us get the X-Squad off our back, then I'm all for it."

"Hmm, interesting." Hazel put a hand to his chin. "And this "Drakus Hydrax", is he truly that strong?"

"Indeed he is." Alexander confirmed. "He's got a skill for every situation."

Corinthian pointed at him. "And comin' from a conqueror like him? That's saying somethin'."

Hazel nodded once more. "Indeed. And so long as he remains a threat to our cause, I suppose he must be dealt with. So, if that is the case, he will be quite the challenge. Whenever we meet, Hydrax will know what it feels like to face a man who cannot feel pain."

Alexander laughed as he pointed to Hazel. "Ooh, I like that!"

"Wait, so you're tellin' me ya ain't able to feel pain at all?" Maril asked.

"I… suppose?" Hazel answered reluctantly. "Your phrasing seems to be a little off my friend."

"Yeah, that's probably a thing with her, you get used to it." Satsuuki explained. "So, this 'feeling no pain' stuff, is that your Semblance thing? Because if it is, that's awesome."

"Heh, yeah, cuz won't know what hit 'er!" Maril exclaimed.

Hazel sighed. "Yes, I suppose. I do not engage in conflict unless absolutely necessary, however if your cousin has a vampire that is truly as strong as you say she is, then I will have no choice but to fight her."

"Hmm, so you're the "strong yet reserved" type." The four turned around as Merrill spoke, the young woman giving them an apathetic stare. "Perhaps you'd want to rethink the way you handle things if you wish to even think about conquering Diana's vampire. Believe me, I speak from experience."

"Really?" Hazel stepped over to the young raccoon. "And what exactly would that experience be?"

Merrill looked away, gazing out the nearest window and narrowing her eyes. "That vampire took mother away from me and Maril, and we here left with nothing once Diana cut us off from the family fortune. Our wealth, status, everything, taken in a blink of an eye." She clenched her fist. "I will make sure that the freak pays for all of the wrongs that she committed against me and Maril, as now that I became a vampire, my power, speed, and stamina rival, no, dwarf Akko's! Compared to her, I am a demigod!"

Hazel raised an eyebrow. "Is that so? Tell me, have you ever lost, not something, but someone close to you? Friends? A significant other? …Family?"

Merrill's eyes shot wide open as she turned back to the much taller man. "I… I'm not one to form personal bonds. Besides my sister and my now dead mother, I looked out for myself, nothing more."

"Hmm, I see. Well then, remember this." Hazel lowered his face so that he was eye level with Merrill. "Compared to losing trivial belongings, losing someone close to you is much more painful than you can ever imagine. No form of shelter, wealth, or nourishment can come close to losing someone you have a special bond with. That is why I choose my battles. Not out of fear, but out of respect for the living." Hazel moved back over to Maril, Satsuuki and Alexander. "Now, let's head to the sparring arenas downstairs. I wish to see what you can do."

Satsuuki slammed her fist into her open palm, smirking. "Sounds good to me!"

Maril pumped her fist up into the air. "Let's do it!"

Alexander only gave a chuckle and a nod.

The doors to the arena closed behind them.

"Geez, and I always thought he was the quiet one." Mercury admitted.

"I've… never heard Hazel speak for that long." Emerald agreed. "Let alone about something so… sentimental."

Merrill narrowed her eyes at the closed door. "What right does he have to lecture me about what's important?"

"As a matter of fact, he has a right to." Salem said as she approached Merrill from behind. "If you recall, Doctor Watts mentioned that Hazel joined our cause because of his animosity toward Ozpin, one in which I share. However, his reasoning was much different than my own. You see, his younger sister, a girl named Gretchen, had attempted to become a Huntress at Beacon Academy, something that Hazel was vehemently against. Her death during a training mission was what drove him to his hatred toward Ozpin, so yes, he does indeed know loss, young Merrill. So see to it that you show respect to him."

Merrill bowed her head. "Yes, of course."

---

The talk with the captain was rather brief. A barricade to the side was being attacked. Blunt force and clawing from rotten hands could be heard. Rumford's archers on the towers were already shooting the new wave of risen. As a sign of competency, souls made their way toward Mallory. However, their efforts were not enough. The barricade of broken wagons and wooden planks were finally taken down. Yukinjas had poured forth from the breach, and behind them stood the figure of a woman.

A horribly rotten beast, slightly hunched over. Her eyes were dead, and only partially covered by long white hair. The ice blue coat revealed a slender figure, with missing skin, and an abdomen ripped open. The body could have fallen apart at any time. Yet, this was not a regular corpse.

"There! That's one of the Pukarins!" Captain Rumford said. "There are more of them in the ruins down the road!"

"Can any of you fight?" Starscream asked the bots, curious.

"What? You kidding? All we do is heckle the films. Fighting isn't in our category!" Crow complained.

"Well, there were those times you appeared on Grudge Match." Gypsy reminded the robots of their appearance in Grudge Match, along with Mike.

"Those are fictional, they don't count."

"Oh, and we aren't." Karlo remarked with a grin.

Lolz sprinted toward the breach, and several risen were cut down in one horizontal strike of a horn. As Rumford went to meet Mallory in clearing the wave, he signaled his snipers to focus on the wretched mother. His men had yet to miss their marks. As the rotted woman stepped forward, two flaming arrows hit her body. The pukarin's foot and kneecap were pierced and burning. She glanced at the archers, then toward Rumford, making a gurgled yell of annoyance. In an attempt to shut her up, one of the archers shot the wretched mother in the head.

"Yes!" The sniper said.

This did not stop her, as she began to move quicker toward the squad and Captain Rumford.

"Oh. Never mind…" The sniper said sadly. His friend in the other tower had a hand on his forehead.

The Pukarin suddenly stopped. It had nothing to do with the flaming arrow. Her body curved to puke something out. Snow burst out from the beast's mouth, and sizzled like acid, staining the dirt road. Whole heads, fingers, and arms emerged from the vomit. She had created more Yukinjas.

While the captain cut down two pale bodies in front of him, Cheri moved forward. Unstrapping a black firebomb from her side, the girl threw it. The Yukinjas along with the vomit burned. While souls were being absorbed, the Pukarin moved to attack Mallory. Her nails were frozen into the shape of short claws, but would not reach the Ashen One.

Mallory brought a shield up, then moved it with a briefly tense backhanded motion. The counterforce was so hard, sparks were made as the wretched mother's nails were parried. Her torso faced away from the Ashen One, unable to do anything at the moment. Taking advantage, Tony spin-kicked the Pukarin towards Drakus. Truthfully, Mallory did that out of instinct. Seeing the Pukarin's nails, while not as long, still reminded her of a claw weapon.

Just then, black facial markings were sprawled all over the Drakonian's face, his pupils went from silver to red, and his eyes…he now had another set of them under his cheeks, and Drakus grabbed the Pukarin as it only made a wordless, painful twitch. "Using your own bile as a way to make monsters that try to turn me into minced meat. How cute." His smile stretched wide at such a pointless effort. Within a volume that made it seem quiet, one word emitted from his mouth.

"Dismantle."

An invisible yet lethal slice of air cut clean through the Pukarin, splitting it in half.

"You should cover the breach." Icy Blitzwing said. "We'll continue ahead and see what we can find."

The captain nodded in agreement. One of his archers on the tower near the breach was ready to shoot more Yukinjas. Rumford waved farewell, while Iris responded with the same gesture. The group would be back in the town later.

The squad walked down a set of dirt steps, reinforced by wood, and Mallory had time to herself again, thinking about the situation. Things were moving quickly, and Mallory wouldn't deny that. The journey through this world was similar. She had faced many individuals in his lifetime. Some of them were undead, with a similar prowess to Mallory's own. The Ashen One shield-bashed a Yukinja, trying to climb onto the wooden bridge the squad was on. It fell into the river below.

'I'm busy.' Mallory thought.

The squad continued up another set of steps, encountering more groups of Yukinjas. A mischief of rats scurried away from Mallory, with a few running into the pale corpses. Some of them were picked up and eaten; their smidgen of souls was also absorbed. The squad destroyed the group, then moved toward another near a burning wagon. They feasted upon the dead body of a militiamen. Mallory cut their meal short.

Ahead of the squad was only more risen dead, save for one group. Beasts with orange fur, horns, and hunched over, having multiple quills on their backs. While the Quill Fiends were fairly dangerous for a mortal, Mallory was undead. She ripped the quills off the ones she killed, using a few of them like throwing knives. The wretched mothers stood no chance against the squad either. Vomiting their liquid rot to create more risen dead only slowed the knight down.

To the sides of the road were a few things to inspect. From locked and abandoned homes, cellars, and even below a well, the exploration kept the knight occupied. In addition, a few chests were found surrounded by more quill fiends and risen dead. They were easy to defeat. Now, Mallory had some gold to spend in case she needed something. One of the chests even had a magic longsword in perfect condition; ready to use.

Mallory had the idea of reinforcing it with a crystal gem. It would make sense to do so. The infused titanite could probably enhance the effects of the magic longsword. Regular titanite reinforcement should make the sword more powerful too. The Ashen One held the weapon. Its thin, faint blue aura was proof of magical value. She also noticed an empty socket on the pommel. Mallory strapped the extra longsword onto her left side, then continued down the path.

"How are you this good at fighting?" Sukuna asked, ripping the arm off a Yukinja.

"My asshole of an ex had me fight his goons all the time to fight Batman, He's a master fighter, and if I can fight him a lot, I can handle these things." Harley laughed, kicking the head off a Yukinja.

Beyond a third set of steps, was the ruins of an old town. Yet, something was off. The town's decay was anything but natural, and it appeared to have been attacked. The gates appear forcefully opened, while what remains of the buildings indicates they were set on fire. Something still moves among the ruins.

"Suddenly, it reeks of hypocrisy in here." Akko said after sniffing the air.

A white-cloaked red-haired figure around the size of a teenage girl stepped into view, the sign of the cross necklace glowing in the moonlight. The full light revealed crazed, emerald eyes.

"Oh, if it isn't the Catholic Church. And what's this? A woman in power? Progress!"

"And if it isn't a bunch of damned heathens!"

"Excuse you! I am a motherfucking vampire! I worked hard and killed many to gain this title, and I deserve to be called as such!" Akko snapped, readying her pistols.

"Well then, motherfucking vampire. What is your name?"

"Akko Kagari, vampire extraordinaire," she said, doing a dramatic cloak flip. "And you, Redneck?"

"It's only fair. The name's-"

---

Amanda O'Neill

Diana read the name multiple times from her report.

"Oh, fuck all kinds of duck!"

"So, Amanda O'Neill. Why are you here?" Sukuna asked.

"I can name a number of reasons." Amanda began to walk forward with confidence and snark. "Your evil, your corruption, your status as a filthy heathen. But most importantly, you're a vampire! And I love killing those!"

"You better be a good fight, because I've been disappointed so far, and I don't see any weapons on you."

"I do, in fact. Knife."

"Kni-"

Multiple blades stabbed Akko in her chest, causing her to grunt. As she fell, however, she fired a perfect headshot, throwing Amanda's body backward. A black firebomb was thrown at O'Neill's back, making her stagger forward. One moment later, a sword pierced through her body. She could not move, with BlueBlaze piercing flesh. Sukuna kicked O'Neill off his vessel's weapon and looked around the squad, who were killing what remained. More dead militiamen, a ruined fountain, and other buildings were examined. There wasn't very much they could take, save for an axe Mystle found on a weapon rack and saw Networker and his Batsers firing at a pillar.

"Hey there, Cyber Blue Boy." Zap said, grinning cheekily.

Networker growled, "I prefer Networker or Baxter Stockman! What, do I need to wear a name tag or something?"

Kanade looked down seeing the knocked out operatives. "Doing some looting, are we?"

"No! I was in the middle of a business deal."

"So who did this?" Hibiki asked, as she lifted up one of the operatives arms before letting it drop to the floor.

'Maybe it can be activated…?' Mallory wondered.

Slipping out was Carmen trying to keep her face covered, "Who is that?" Krell asked.

"I'll find out!" Roman called, as he went after her.

Roman caught up with Carmen, as the two fought hand to hand. When Carmen exposed her face, Roman was cut off guard, before Carmen knocked him back.

"So you must be the OVDF that Stockman here mentioned." she said.

"Who are you?" Kanade asked.

"I really try not to give my name away to strangers." Carmen answered.

Networker started getting miffed by being ignored, "Get them all!" he ordered his robots who attacked all around.

"Take 'em down!" Drakus ordered, as they all went on the attack.

The squad went to work disarming and destroying the Batsers, while the Ultra Violets were using their superpowers and other assorted skills. Carmen, who observed their fighting styles while defending herself, was shocked, "Whoa."

"Decapitation!" shouted Amanda as she sliced off Akko's head, much to everyone's shock. "I'm glad she only shot me in the head, but I wonder if I can do anything about these bloodstain-" Amanda noticed that Sukuna was charging at her, as the two engaged in a sword fight. Her signature smirk appeared. "I'm just doing my job! Killing vampires and heathens! Maybe find a pot of gold for the church while I'm here."

"Oh dear god, not you too." Lotte groaned.

"That's a sin right there."

Sukuna was interrupted by a disturbance. He lowered his hand and glanced over his palm. Turning from a frown to a smile, as if he knew what it meant.

"Damn…I guess it's that time already…" Sukuna turned back around away from Amanda bringing him a perplexed expression.

"Wait, what are-" Networker started, before Sukuna abruptly cut him off.

"Things have changed…my time in control of this body is up. You may live to see another day as I need to do something before he completely takes control."

Sukuna leapt up with a smirk. "Alrighty, you demonic brat, consider this as a welcoming gift from me to you. Savor it for as long as you live." And just as quick as he arrived, Sukuna faded away into the far depths of Drakus' mind, as the markings sprawled across his face faded into nothing as if they weren't there in the first place. The second set of crimson eyes closed on their own, just under Drakus' main set as his eyes returned to their normal silver hue, as Drakus immediately dropkicked Amanda, and suplexed Networker.

Neo and Roman made their way to the truck and saw all the crates. They pried one of them open to see it was loaded with about twenty canisters of mutagen.

"Whoa, look at all this goo!" Roman laughed.

"Based off all these crates, that's more than a hundred of them." Neo realized. "My guess is that this ain't lube, or alien cum."

"So I take it this stuff is what he was selling?" Carmen asked, while holding up one of the canisters.

Roman jumped upon seeing she was right there, "Wha-how did you?" he asked in shock.

"Hey, Tall Red, be careful with that stuff! You don't know where it's been!" Neo warned her.

"Relax, I'm very careful." Carmen assured him.

"Put it down now!" Neo ordered her.

"Sorry, but I need this as evidence." she said, as she hid it in her coat and left the cemetery.

"Hey, get back here!" Neo shouted, as her and Roman chased after her.

As Carmen was suddenly cut off by three Batsers, they were sliced in half by Sabrina's scythe, "Not bad." Carmen said.

"Thank you very much." Sabrina replied.

"Little Blue, grab her!" Roman ordered.

Sabrina curiously decided to grab Carmen, but the thief was slipping by casually pushing Sabrina to the side. "This just got weirder." Carmen said while looking at Stiffany, Bubbles and Dr. Bonehead. Mr. Bubble tried to run at her, but the thief dodged and flipped over the Big Daddy.

Some of the VILE operatives woke up and saw what was going down, and were surprised at the sight of the squad. When they saw the Bullhead still had the mutagen, they scrambled to it and closed it before starting the vehicle.

The group heard the engine and saw the Bullhead ready to fly off, with Networker running onto it. "They're getting away!" Kanade cried.

"Looks like you lost this round." Networker laughed, before activating the jet, as it flew off.

"Well, we still have her." Tamson motioned to Carmen.

"Guys, she's got a canister of mutagen." Ridley warned the gang.

"So this is the mutagen?" Carmen asked, as she once again looked at the canister.

"Put that down or you're gonna be sorry." Zap warned her.

"I already am," she replied, "Sorry for leaving you hanging." she activated her grappling hook and shot it to the skylight. As she shimmied up, Drakus latched onto Carmen. Upon grabbing the thief's arm, Carmen turned around, as Drakus was grinning cheekily.

"Oh, any bells you may have will start ringing soon enough, Black Sheep!" Drakus laughed, and at that moment, Carmen was taken aback by being called her original VILE name, "What?! How do you?"

"What, don't you and ol' Shadowsan, remember?" Drakus asked, "Mr. Maelstrom's favorite student? Or best dancer in the whole academy?" he did some of his dance moves. "Shazam!"

"Shazam? No...! It can't be?!" Carmen gasped, as she got a good look at the Drakonian imagining someone else in his place, "Devon Jetstream?! Player, the infiltration turned crazy." Carmen contacted her hacker.

"I know, Red. I watched the security footage," Player replied, "What now?"

"We need to look into this further." Carmen said knowing there was more going on than she thought.

"We're from the future, Sandiego!" Lolz said.

"Oh, I bet." Carmen said, rolling her eyes.

"The world is in peril." Roffle explained.

"All that is good has been consumed by evil!" Lolz added.

Roffle's eye began to glow. "The end is nigh! Nighhh!"

Roffle and Lolz morphed into some kind of scary thunder mist horse amalgam, as several copies of their heads in various sizes emerge then disappear back into the cloud chanting "Nigh! Niiigh!" before finally turning back to normal.

"Yep, so THAT was the freakiest thing I've ever seen." Carmen said, her eyes widened.

"Come with us to the future!" Lolz offered.

"We need your help to finish our snowman!" Roffle added.

"Snowman? What are you going on about?" Carmen asked.

As they turned to make their way back, Mallory noticed something on the ground. This was a summoning circle, like the one in town.

'Maybe it can be activated…?' Mallory wondered.

"There's no time to explain!" Lolz said.

"Miss Sandiego, grab onto our tongues!" Roffle said.

"How do I-" Carmen asked, only for Roffle and Lolz' tongues shoot out of their mouths and drape themselves on Carmen. "Okay, ew."

Rather quickly, the X-Squad and Carmen had quickly stepped onto the rune, as the blue light seemed to fold the squad's forms, making them disappear. They were no longer standing in that circle. The Tristram Ruins were quiet, except for the low-pitched humming of blue fire and one crazed priestess who finally got up.

"Sonuva protestant whore!"

Back in Sync City, a Waypoint awakened. A piercing blue light hits an old rune on the ground. The form of the squad unfolded, as azure embers danced briefly in the air before disappearing. Three lights on the circle dim, going back to their normal sizes. Mystle looked around, seeing some of the guards look in surprise. One of them makes a response that can be heard.

"Woah, they got the waypoint working!" The sniper said.

"Sandiego, we're here!" Lolz said.

"In the futureee!" Roffle cheered, as they blew into a party horn.

Candice and Captain Rumford were also around, standing near Tom's Diner's entrance. Vader politely waved to them as he walked, while they did the same. The captain spoke first.

"Are they gone?" Rumford asked.

"Yep, though Akko might be dead." Penguin replied.

It was Diana's turn to smirk. "She's dead?"

"Of course she is! Her head's not on her body!" Zant snapped.

Diana's eyes turned confident. "That's step one. What about steps two through ten?"

"Wha-"

A black figure had formed with red eyes and a crimson aura. From Akko's severed head, her entire body regenerated, first as shadows, then into her familiar purple cloak. There she stood, in her full glory, grinning like a madwoman with her fangs out.

"Surprise, bitch!"

"How the heck did you do that?" Cheri asked.

"Fuck you. That's how."

Rumford almost laughed, then smiled. "Once again, I thank you for helping us." He glances at a girl with short brown hair, held together with an orange cloth hairband. She wore a red long-sleeve with a white undershirt, with the sleeves moved back to reveal her forearms. Belts, a satchel, an orange sash, and an animal pelt covered the woman's hips. Brown pants and worn leather boots completed the outfit. As for any weapons, she only appeared to have a bow. Rumford then looked towards the squad. "I know this is really abrupt, but may I ask you something?" the squad nodded. "Can you talk with Leah for a moment? She isn't giving up on the idea of rescuing her uncle."

"She really shouldn't. He's a relative to her." Krell responded. One of the guards called Rumford over to speak with him, ending their conversation. Leah moves closer to speak with the Ashen One.

"We need to reopen the cathedral first." Leah said. "The guards locked it up before they were ambushed."

"Well then, do you have a key?" Icy Blitzwing said.

"No. Rumford told me they fought their way back to a hut." Leah replied. "So, the key must still be there."

Before the squad could lead the way, Leah went ahead of them. "I can show you the path." The girl said. She stood on the waypoint for one moment, then disappeared right after in blue light. The squad followed her.

'She already knows how to use the waypoint.' Mallory thought. 'It may be good to keep an eye on her. Although, the other militiamen knew about this waypoint too.'

The squad traveled back to the ruins they cleared, seeing Leah unlock a gate. She looked behind to see the squad. Then, Leah moved her head in the direction of the new path, telling him to follow. As they walked, they could hear five officers teleporting through the waypoint. They made a small cordon around the summoning circle.

"So, about the hut…" Leah began.

"Go on." Riff replied.

"My mother owned it. Yet, I never met her. She died when I was young." Leah said. "I was raised by my uncle Deckard instead."

"What happened to your father? Same fate?" Blackarachnia asked.

Leah hesitated, then said, "I was told he was a great warrior. One who was lost when Tristram fell to the Yokai revolt."

"I-sorry for asking." The spider Decepticon said.

'Yokai?' Mallory wondered. 'Why did she say Yokai instead of demons?'

"Do you have any experience with them?" The girl asked.

This time, the Ashen One hesitated, then said, "Nope."

The conversation ended there, along with encountering another group of risen dead. Some of them were hit with Leah's arrows, while most of them were killed by the squad. They continued forward, seeing the old hut beyond a bridge.

"There it is…." Leah whispered. It was loud enough for the X-Squad to hear.

Once making it to the other side, both went to the entrance of the hut. They could see two dead militiamen, possibly from Rumford's unit. Near their corpses was a hole in the ground, revealing a ladder. Leah and Mallory looked at each other, with the girl climbing down first. Mallory looked around, seeing a few potions on nearly empty shelves. Before she could grab one, Leah ushered to follow her.

"Come on, follow me!" Leah said. There was a slight echo in her voice.

The Ashen One went down the ladder to meet her, the X-Squad following soon after. Below was an old cellar, with one of the walls missing. Instead, a large breach extended the lower level; another pathway.

"You didn't know about this?" Mystle said.

"People did call her a witch, yet I never believed it." Leah responded. "I should have known better."

The squad and Leah continued through the cellar pathway, bringing them to a spacious cave. To the left were two tables and disorganized stacks of books near a few stalagmites. To their right was an old bookshelf, along with a dead end. However, right in front of them was a cauldron. Underneath it, was a fresh fire. Something was here.

"There's something eerie in the air here," Penguin said with a sneer.

"Logically speaking, it's just cold and you're paranoid because of the stories," Riddler pointed out.

"Logically speaking, we're on a team with ALIENS, KNOWN PSYCHOS, WITCHES, POSSIBLE GODS, AND DEMONS!" Penguin replied. "I think I'll trust my intuition on this."

The ground broke open at different points. What rose from the earth were four militiamen, hungry and undead. Interestingly the one in front was taller, with armor that was like Rumford's. Only, the lower half was missing. It seems to have been torn off, evident by many claw marks on its chest plate. There is enough missing to see the man's clothing, rotted green from death. His body was covered in a faint yellow aura.

"Captain Daltyn?!" Leah yelled.

Her bow was already out. As she fired an arrow at the former captain, he moved his head to the left to dodge. The projectile hit a risen through their skull instead. Now there were only three left.

"I'll deal with Daltyn!" Mallory said, while bringing out her knight's shield. "Focus on the other two!"

Leah nodded, then went to aim at her targets as the X-Squad rushed into battle. Mallory ran forward, while Daltyn did the same. The Ashen One's longsword connected first, cutting the captain. In response, the former guard raised their hand in the air, palm facing the ceiling. The temperature dropped in the cave. Everyone could see their exhales. As Daltyn moved to swipe at the knight again, frigid spheres of ice began to form. Below them, more frost accumulated, decreasing the temperature further.

Mallory knew these things were ready to explode. While she rolled away from the undead police officer, a frigid sphere formed quickly in his hand. Daltyn threw it at Mallory, who managed to block it. However, as the sphere broke, painful frost covered both the shield, and her left forearm. The Ashen One made a slight grunt, unheard by Leah. The girl and the X-Squad had killed the remaining two zombies quickly, and resisted the urge to throw up as they saw the zombies burst into a spray of black liquid. From the dark pools emerged many small spider-like ice beasts. "Oh sugarsticks! Charlies!" Iris yelled.

After decapitating another zombie, Stormy Weather's head whipped around to Iris. "What?!"

"Charlottes! Zom-spawn! They explode when you hit them!"

"Who calls them Charlies?!" Starscream yelled.

"Everybody! It's cute!" Scarlett responded.

"There's nothing cute about Charlottes! They're basically zombies in the shape of spiders!" Opal yelled.

Iris groaned in frustration "Just kill them before they-"

The other frigid spheres exploded, completely missing Leah and the squad. The knight brought his shield up, then sprinted forward. Daltyn ran toward him again, another sphere in his hand. With a quick turn, Roman made his way behind the captain, who just finished his frozen swipe. A rope black firebomb was in the thief's hand. Except instead of throwing it behind him, he grabbed Daltyn's head and shoved it through his mouth. With his head pulled back by the rope, Neo ran him through with Hush. Making a large enough wound, Mystle brought out another black firebomb, plunging it next to the new wound.

Daltyn tried to reach behind for Roman, but failed. As Neo kicked the captain off her weapon, sparks ignited the black firebomb. Captain Daltyn is propelled forward, with the blast igniting the other bomb in his mouth, as the Charlottes exploded... in addition to the zombies trying to free themselves from the ground. The resulting blast killed them all and the spawn in one moment... Some of his collarbone, brains, charred arms and legs are what remained of the undead. Leah could only watch, as a girl clad in blue leapt down.

"-Explode."

Neo sniffed. "I was just waiting for them to move to the right spot at the right time."

"The dead can be such a pain, you know that?"

"Were you watching us?" Drakus asked. "That's just like you, Garie. Rotten to the core as always."

Garie Tūmān, an Autoscorer as cold as she was brutal. Among the Alchemic Cult, she was responsible for collecting memories from humans to give her fellow Autoscorers life.

"Please don't say that about me, Master Drakus. Carol's the one who made me this way." Garie teased as she landed on the rock next to Drakus.

"Are your sisters back in top shape?" Drakus asked, changing the subject.

"The whole fixing them up thing's going smoothly." Garie answered. "Micha's the only one we got back, though. She's so greedy!" Garie began to pretend to cry when saying this, as a girl with long red hair, pink eyes, and sharp teeth clad in red leapt down and glomped her, and as much as she feigned annoyance at her antics, Garie cared deeply about her hotheaded goofball of a girlfriend.

"I'm hungry! I haven't eaten all day," Micha whined.

Created from the mystical power of alchemy, Garie, Micha, and their other two sisters (metaphorically speaking of course) were composed of peculiar functionalities. In essence, they were battle robots in the bodies of living dolls. In order to fuel themselves, autoscorers drained the memories of living beings with a deadly kiss. Micha was the exception, instead having her functions hyper-focused on combat. Unable to drain memories like her peers, Micha's only option for refueling was through a kiss from Garie, as Garie was the only one that had the functionality to transfer memories to fellow autoscorers through a touch of the lips, which helps with giving Micha all the affection she deserves.

"I'm sorry I can't keep myself fed! If I only-" Micha awkwardly responded to Garie's glare.

"Big shocker, you can't do a thing for yourself!" Garie snarled, blushing deeply as damnit, Micha's even cuter when she's annoying.

Micha sheepishly covered her mouth with one of her giant hands.

"Please Garie, I won't ask for any more from you for the rest of the day," she promised.

"You'll be fine," Garie dismissed, trying desperately to get out of Micha's hug because it's making her realize things about herself that might not exactly be said in polite company.

Micha felt her metaphorical stomach mumble an extensive growl. Knowing of Garie's impatience, she had purposefully waited some extra time before requesting another kiss. Her functional dependence on Garie was the spark of conflict, and one that she couldn't even help.

"Please, I swear, I've never been hungrier in my life," Micha only somewhat exaggerated.

"Sounds pretty serious," Garie briefly feigned sympathy, internally screaming at her girlfriend acting like an idiot. "Find someone who cares."

Micha whimpered. Today, Garie was putting up quite the fight.

"But I…."

"Not another word out of you!" Garie barked, trying to keep her hopeless lesbian heart in check, cause if not, she'd probably lose control of herself and take Micha right then and there in front of everyone, a prospect which was looking increasingly more attractive by the second.

The squad looked around the blast radius of the black firebombs, then Mystle went and picked up Captain Daltyn's smoldering helmet. It would serve as better proof of his condition instead of their word alone. Mallory was certain Daltyn had been magically enhanced. That yellow aura is something to be cautious of. Mallory looked at her mostly thawed left arm and shield. She was hoping to learn Daltyn's frost spell through an item. Sadly, the undead captain had very little on him. The Ashen One walked toward a silent girl in red.

"You did well," Krell said. "We would have been distracted by the other undead."

'Although, they could die just as quickly from my own weapons.' Mallory thought internally. Leah gave a slow, wordless nod in agreement, then looked through some piles of books. 'Hmm, perhaps I overdid it.' Mallory thought, looking back toward Daltyn's charred, scattered pieces.

The girl stopped searching through the books, looking at something intently. She grabbed a journal, opening it to skim the pages. Leah paused for a moment before closing it. The girl walked back to the squad, showing them two things.

"Here, I got the key from one of the soldiers," Leah said. "and...my mother's journal. I think I've read enough of it." She handed the journal over to Razoff and continued speaking. "I want to know more about her, but that can wait."

The hunter was silent, then he responded. "Then give me the key," Razoff gestured. "We'll look for your uncle. You will be safer here, and can learn more about your mother's secrets." 'I may learn a few from her journal.'

Knowing that the squad is more skilled than herself, Leah gave Roman the Tristram Cathedral Key. She thanked the squad, and began looking through old books again. Only, Leah is stopped by Mystle, who tossed Daltyn's helmet to her. She told the girl to speak with Rumford, along with handing him the former captain's helm. The squad walked away from Leah, opening her mother's journal.

"So, Scrap Poe" Drakus asked, "What can you bring to the table?"

"Um...I…" P03's expression turned sheepish, slightly sour. "I'll share the Karnoffel Code, okay?"

"The what now?" Starscream asked.

"It's an ancient ritual from my world," P03 explained. "Inscryption, the game, was programmed as a front to hide the data of the Karnoffel Code on the disk." Its expression was sly once more. "It's why I'm sentient, you know. Enacting one sequence from it gives you knowledge you shouldn't have if you're just a game character. Enacting a second sequence can turn game characters real, out in the players' world. And if you execute the whole thing…well, let's just say you really shouldn't do that. It unleashes dark forces beyond comprehension. Which is the perfect leverage for me to use to stay a top dog, so long as I have it. The last person to have it in the world my game was made in…well, he was almost able to completely take it over, and he's regarded as the most evil person in history."

"I don't think I want any specifics on that," Evelyn said quickly, picking up on just where that might be going. "And I'm not looking to summon Cthulhu here. But I kinda died back in my universe, so you're telling me this…Karnoffel Code can make me a new one."

Indeed, there were quite a few disturbing things within. Razoff stopped on a page that interested him. Signed by Leah's mother, Adria, is an account of one man by the name of Aidan. This individual seemed to be haunted by their past as if Hell was following him. Another part of the entry revealed that Adria departed Tristram before it was attacked. Razoff wondered if she told anyone else to escape with her. He climbed up the ladder to exit the witch's cellar.

The squad was greeted by groups of Yukinjas, but cut them all down, continuing on the old pathway. A tree with two hanging bodies could be seen up ahead. Mallory thought they may have been criminals. Yet upon closer inspection, these were just more victims. The squad moved on, knowing they couldn't do anything for them.

Uphill stood the Tristram Cathedral, struck by a fallen star. A group of Yukinjas were in the middle of eating a villager's corpse. They stood no chance against the squad. The doors were old, yet not weak, as King Shark kicked the doors open, the squad entered the former holy ground, seeing several pews broken. Micha killed a few risen dead blocking the path, then continued. Beyond them was a large hole with bright blue light. Some of the floor collapsed around it.

'The only way down, I suppose.' Garie thought.

Before they jumped in, the squad looked beyond the hole. Stained glass windows held the depiction of an angel in gold armor, smiting demons below him. His form was so large, each window had one-third of his body. Mallory hoped she wouldn't have to fight this individual. The Ashen One already killed lots of angels while on the warpath to destroy all demons, including those with demon blood in them, and didn't need another dying by her hands. Mallory looked away from the windows.

The Ashen One removed the Knight's Ring from her finger, replacing it with the Silvercat Ring. It would allow her to fall from great heights. Mallory looked down at the hole, with its blue light refusing to fade. The squad leaped forward, falling into the illuminated depths. As the squad fell, they could see old architecture. Layers of different sublevels, untouched for years. The Ashen One landed on stone tiles, with effects of the Silvercat ring mitigating the fall as the squad crashed onto the floor, trying to prop themselves up.

At the top of a staircase, Mallory could see the light, now greatly illuminated. Going down the steps, the squad observed the breach. Some of the flames were like liquid, bleeding and unending. Whatever the Fallen Star was, managed to breach several levels. Iris kicked a rock down into the hole, waiting for an echoed thud. Yet, there was no sound to determine depth. She walked away, searching for both a way down and Leah's uncle.

There were multiple groups of risen within the cathedral. Some were feasting on dead villagers, while others roamed in search of food. One appeared to be larger than the others, though. A somewhat round figure resembling a snowman, with stubby legs and chubby arms. The rest of its body was stitched together, implying that this had been the product of some experiment. Mallory replaced the ring she used to survive her descent, wearing the knight's ring again. Mystle slowly moved forward in a stance, intending to cut open a line of stitches.

The Frostbitten made their way toward the dream demon, completely fearless. Mystle slashed upward, cutting open a portion of its stitching. In return, it retaliated by arching its back. Several large spikes erupted from the grotesque's body, almost making contact with the dream demon. Mystle rolled behind the undead creature, cutting open another set of stitches. snow then spewed from both open wounds. It could not handle the damage, as its knees were on the ground. Lune moved for a critical strike.

The demon jumped on the grotesque's back, then turned around mid-air. With a plunge attack, she pierced the top of its head with her knife. The downward force brought the undead creature forward. It fell to the ground, with Lune ripping her knife right out of its head. As she was about to walk away, the Frostbitten made a grunting noise. The body had begun to bloat quickly. Air around the Frostbitten darkened, then rippled outward. The squad braced for impact.

An explosion of snow spread across the area, pushing the squad back slightly. Multiple worms poured from the remains. Some of them were larger than others, moving in groups of three. However, these Ice Worms failed to avenge their host. The squad continued exploring the Cathedral.

A few bats were seen in the hallway. Yet, these were far from normal. The beasts held green bodies, with one yellow eye. Three horns were on its form; two on the sides while one was on top. There was an additional stinger on the bottom that appeared to be their main way of attacking. Blue electricity would spark occasionally from the creatures. Ridley threw a kukri at one of them.

From a distance, one could hear the sound of a knife impacting an eye. Ridley sprinted forward, hearing a yelp from the dying Carrion Bat. Riff swung his scimitar horizontally, cutting another bat in half as he knelt. Some blood showered Riff while looking at the downed beast. With his left knee on one wing, Ridley pulled the kukri out. Then, Ridley stabbed its eye twice. A third stab was given, followed by riding the blade up the bat's body. The Ashen One stood up, putting the kukri away.

After seeing what the dragon had done, the other carrion bats attempted to kill the X-Squad. Slightly annoyed from just putting the kukri away, he threw it again; hard. The creature fell, with souls flowing into their new vessel. Another carrion bat intended to stab Mallory with its electrified stinger, only for him to grab it. Holding the beast in place, he pierced its eyeball. The Ashen One twisted his weapon, opposite to the shape of its vertical iris. Through a two-way action, Mallory ripped the carrion bat in half. With no enemies close to them, Roman began to examine the stinger.

Blue electricity continued to pulse from the beast's organ. It was long enough to be a curved dagger. Although, it had no proper handle. Roman put it away, knowing that the squad could use the stinger later. The squad continued looking for Leah's uncle.

Atop one set of stairs, the squad could see an injured villager approaching him. The man held his stomach as if he was trying to keep something inside. He spoke with fear and pain.

"Please, kill me!" He said. "I don't...I don't want to change!"

He suddenly screamed. His body burst with a white corruption. The man died standing. Another individual, the Ashen One could not save. Before they could move, King Shark consumed the Yukinja rather quickly. While Mallory absorbed the man's souls, the Ashen One could see a group of Yukinjas pouring out of a room. Cheri threw two firebombs to get rid of them quickly. Then, the squad continued exploring.

There were more of the same undead creatures the squad needed to kill. Other times, they would find bookcases hiding some gold coins. Mallory collected those to use for future purchases. Some rooms were empty, with the only life in them being lit torches and small spiders on their webs. Ones that got in his way had their smidgen of souls absorbed. The squad cut a way through another group of carrion bats, only to see something at the end of a hallway.

Near a stone balcony was an old book, open on a lectern. It held the account of a captain named Lachdanan, who had to slay his king to purge six demonic beings back to Hell. Yet, this was only one part of his writing. The squad would look into this at another time if they did not find another lectern.

This next entry was also by Lachdanan. The captain speaks of an archbishop he concluded to be highly manipulative, named Lazarus. They convinced the king and his council to start a war with another city. Their efforts were for nothing, as Lachdanan and a few others were the only ones to survive.

Sabrina realized one thing. "Clearly, Lazarus had something to gain from this conflict. Or at least, attempted to. If he is still alive, then we'll need to kill him."

Eventually, the squad found a large doorway. It was left open, with the statue of a bishop on each side. This was the only path left he did not explore. Thus, the squad moved beyond the doorway. Then, Mallory began to hear a familiar sound of flame.

To Mallory's left was an unlit Bonfire. This was a welcoming sight, since it gave an alternative to the Waypoints. The angel of death walked over to the fire, putting a hand over it. Warm embers had now been rekindled into one large flame, making this the second bonfire available to Mallory. Its whispers reached her, calling this area Leoric's Passage.

'The King?' Mallory wondered. 'Lachdanan mentioned him in his writings. He had to slay the sovereign he looked up to. If that man is dead, then the Fallen Star may have-'

This brief pondering was interrupted, as the Cathedral rumbled. Debris from the upper levels fell into the bleeding breach. The squad could hear an echoed voice from an archway on the lower level.

"Foul minions! Stay back!" The voice said. "Back!"

An elderly man came out the doorway, being chased by three Yukinjas.

"May this ledge hold..."

The unsupported stone bricks and tiles began to fall, with the skeletons losing their footing. While the elderly man was safe on the other side, the undead fell to their doom. Sounds of rattling metal and bone indicated a deadly impact for each one. Mallory absorbed the souls of each Yukinja, confirming their deaths. She wondered if this survivor may be Leah's uncle.

Before reaching the bottom of the second staircase, Uriel spotted ghostly energy. He crouched back up to a dimmer area of the steps. It rose higher from the ground, reminding him of individuals summoned into his world. Yet, this is something different. A mass of purple energy rose, becoming more defined as the shape of a lanky dragon.

"The...Dark Moon, Zazz?" The old man said.

'Dark Moon?' Garie repeated internally. She thought back once more to Lachdanan's writing. 'This is one of the beings Lachdanan wrote about...'

The demon's gaze remained focused on the elderly man. They say nothing for a moment, then the demon laughed.

"Your Fallen Star's magic has woken me and my brethren right back up!" Zazz said. "With our return, we're gonna turn this place right into our own personal playpen!"

Dark Moon

Zazz

His focus shifted upward, erratically at the walls. Then a gaze toward the floor, looking beyond it. Zazz refocused on the old man.

"Now, time to give you a good spanking!" The king yelled, his body glowing. "Invoke, the turtle beast! Bring me his bones!"

Bright, magic light coursed through Zazz' arms. They stopped at his hands, along with the demon raising them and clapping, covering him in a yellow aura. Then the light disappeared, with Zazz relaxing. The demon leapt down. Suddenly, energy moved to land on stone flooring. A pale light had surrounded the elderly man. In their place, skeletons rose from the ground, and something else formed at a surprising rate, a turtle, albeit a large one that is capable of walking on two legs and flying. He possesses a pronounced sagittal crest on top of his head and his mouth is filled with teeth, which is unprecedented in turtles - with exceptions perhaps for the prehistoric turtles Proganochelys and Odontochelys - plus a pair of large tusks protruding upward from the lower jaws.

Friend To All Children

Gamera

"It's a...a..." Lawton said, eyes bugging out.

"Ah, it's a shorter Gamera!" Tom Servo said in a Japanese-like accent.

"Wait, you know this guy?" Katana asked the robots.

"Well, normally, he was a monster in some of the films we watched." Crow said in shock and amazement. "But he was supposed to be fictional, nonexistent!"

"Well, he exists now, so I say we should kick his shell ass to kingdom come!" Taisho exclaimed, waving her trident into the air. While the survivor began to block the turtle's attacks with his staff, the X-Squad sprinted toward him.

"Yo! My name's Zazz and I'm going to kick your tails all the way down to the ground!"

"Oh yeah? Well how about I'll be the one to kick your ass first? Would you like that instead?" Taisho retorted.

"Why you little-!"

As the Ashen One saw the man hit the turtle on the nose, which sent Zazz flying, she was not focused on what had formed near him. Zazz appeared suddenly in front of her, opening with a spinning back kick. Mallory only had enough time to block with a heavy longsword. The angel glanced over at the old man, seeing him fend off Gamera's attacks. Mallory got into a stance once more, waiting for the demon to strike.

Zazz dashed forward with a downward vertical swing. Mallory dodged to the right, then moved forward with a heavy lunge. The attack pierced the skeleton's leg, making it stagger. Zazz went for a horizontal strike from the right, making Taylor dodge away. Yet right after that motion, Zazz disappeared. Mallory felt a claw slice her back, pushing him forward. The Ashen One was face-first on the ground, missing a disk from his spine.

'He's got teleportation!' Mallory thought. 'At least I know what to expect now.'

The angel of death recovered with a roll, throwing a firebomb at Zazz. As the demon dodged the bomb, Mallory quickly applied a resin to her sickles. It smelled of charcoal while covering the sickles in fire. The Ashen One sprinted forward, readying an upward diagonal strike. Zazz simply teleported to dodge the attack, with Razoff blocking his follow-up. Razoff sliced the demon's arm and leg with a sword, seeing the demon's aura flickering. Then, Zazz began to charge a powerful swing. This would be his mistake.

Mystle rolled behind the demon. Multiple slashes distorted the aura on Zazz' right leg. Neo spun to face the demon's head, throwing a Charcoal Pine Bundle in front of him. She would spin a second time, now with a charged horizontal swing.

Garie's spear hit the falling resin, pushing it onto Headcleaver's face. Continuing the motion, this ignited Neo's thrown bundle. The spear sliced through Zazz' face, now covered in a large raging flame. The doll looked toward the old man to see his condition, as the fire on his sword extinguished.

"Isa," Sucy said, counting her kills in time with her silenced pistol shots.

"Dalawa...tatlo, apat, lima."

Every shot was met with a skeleton crumbling into the ground.

"Anim, pito."

Every skeleton was dead, so Sucy tossed one of her firebombs into the skeleton pile and walked out, humming her national anthem as she did so. As the explosion went off behind her, she stayed unmoved, simply enjoying the smell of napalm and smoke.

The turtle was bonked on the head, as Gamera tried to bite the old man, as Ridley suplexed Gamera, knocking him out.

"You really think this is all you've got? Get ready for my beatdown because you're going home in a box!" Zazz snapped, shaking off the flame, as suddenly his arm bands channeled some of his magic into a barrage of magical projectiles known as danmaku, which Zazz proceeded to launch at the squad.

"No, you'll be the one going home in a box! Plus I'll ship you back to Hell for an easy one day fast free shipping!" Taylor remarked, ducking underneath the barrage of purple bullet hell.

Cracking their knuckles, Taylor watched as Zazz forcefully charged towards them like a train, easily taking one step to the side before seeing him crash into a wall. He did the same thing a few times, Taylor literally cracking up at how funny it was at each and every failure.

"Come on! Is that all you got?" Drakus taunted, hopefully trying to draw him in.

"Why you little... STINKIN' BRAT!"

Angered by this, Zazz made a ball of lightning and threw it at the squad, hoping to crush them. But instead, Stocking swatted it back at Zazz, who got hit pretty hard. After that, he got up and growled at the squad while wincing in pain.

"You were lucky this time! Next time we meet, I'm going to flatten you up!"

"Looking forward to it, Zazz!"

Soon, the demon fled in a plume of smoke, and the elderly man appeared more tired than injured, evident by leaning on his staff. His breathing was a little rough, yet that did not stop him from speaking.

"Thank you for helping," He said. "But, why did you risk yourself for me?"

Kanade didn't give an immediate response, then asked a question. "You know anyone named Leah?"

"Well, yes. She is a relative of mine," The man responded. "Why do you ask?"

"Your niece asked us to help find her uncle. Here you are."

The man reacted with relief. "I had initially feared the worst. It is good to know she is alright!"

He gestured to a nearly empty bookcase, walking toward it. The squad followed the man, who pulled one of the books on the shelf. Sliding stone can be seen moving the bookshelf out of the way. An old pathway was revealed, possibly being an exit out of the Cathedral.

The elderly man turned around, giving an explanation. "I've known about this passageway, after examining a few old maps." They began walking upstairs together, with the man continuing to speak. "This will take us to the Cathedral's Garden. I will awaken the old Waypoint there."

The squad could see the night sky once more. In front of them was the old waypoint Leah's uncle had mentioned. As he got closer, it activated simply by his presence.

"Follow me to Sync City," He said. "We have some things to discuss about the Fallen Star."

"Trust me, I know a guy," she got in the back seat of a car, as Drakus called the Drakerari and shuffled the old man into it. "Punch it, Zack!"

Zack burned rubber and sped off, as the Drakerari followed after it.

When the squad finally got to Sync City, they could see Leah hugging her uncle once he got out.

"You're alive!" Leah said.

"Only thanks to you and your friend here," The uncle said with a smile.

"Heh, oddly cute." Micha said.

Yet in the next moment, that joy faded.

"The Fallen Star..." The old man said. "I don't know very much about it, or this mist surrounding Sync City, though I believe it is connected to the End Days prophecy."

Leah responded. "The End Days. Uncle, I just got you back."

"It must be a sign that the end has begun." The uncle replied.

"I think we can talk about your stories later," Leah said.

"Leah, I do not think it's wise to ignore prophecy," Krell said. "Especially when there are events identical to said predictions."

"Your friend seems to believe me. Why don't you?" The man said to Leah.

The girl said nothing; walking back to her room at the inn. Before Mallory could call Leah back, her uncle stopped him.

"Don't," He said. "She will understand one day."

"Oh, sorry," Garie said. "I thought your reunion with her would go smoother."

"Well, besides that..." The uncle paused. "We still need to deal with the Dark Moon. You have not told me your name, either."

Realizing this, the Ashen One spoke. "You may call me Malthael."

"Deckard." The old man said in return. Both individuals shook hands with each other. 'Malthael? The angel of death's name...Perhaps you are a savior.'

---

On VILE, back when she was known as Black Sheep, Carmen was walking to class when she was bumped out of the way by Drakus, back when he was still going by Devon Jetstream, with black and white hair and wearing a black jacket, red dress shirt, blue jeans and silver cleats, who was doing some of his dance moves. A passing Tigress saw what happened and laughed. Jetstream scowled at the girl's mockery, until he smirked.

"Devon Jetstream was Professor Maelstrom's best student next to Paper Star. And also the regular class clown."

When Tigress took her seat in class, there was a loud farting noise. She reached down and pulled up a whoopie cushion. Jetstream burst out laughing, as did several of the students. Including Carmen.

"With Tigress as his favorite victim."

---

The flashback ended, "But, how did you end up like this?"

"It's a long story." Drakus replied.

"Wait a minute," Krell spoke up, "Captain Hydrax, you used to work for this VILE group?"

"Hey, where do you think I learned how to be a cool crook?"

Shadowsan nodded, "Indeed. Jetstream, or rather, Hydrax, was a very promising student who excelled in several classes, but his top class was with Professor Maelstrom. He was considered the best student Maelstrom's ever worked with."

Carmen looked back to the squad. "Well, since you know who I am. Let me introduce you to the rest of team Carmen. This is Zack and Ivy."

"Hey there." Zack greeted.

"Hi." Ivy greeted.

"My mentor, Shadowsan." Shadowsan bowed his head to them in respect.

"And also the most cracked oldhead that's not an anime character." Drakus added.

Carmen held up her phone to reveal Player, "And this is Player."

"Whoa, you weren't kidding, Red. Aliens, demons, magic, it's all real." Player gasped.

"Wow, you have someone in your phone too?" Yuina gasped, as Ark looked confused.

"Magic?" Ivy asked in disbelief.

"Come on! You're pulling our leg!" Zack laughed.

Starscream spoke up, "Nope. They're actually serious."

Suddenly Carmen and the Boston sibs looked down at the Decepticon in shock, "That bot just talked!" Zack gasped.

Blackarachnia gave them an annoyed look, "Really? There are literal aliens, living dolls, demons, even mages, in front of you, and you're more surprised by the talking jet?!"

"So how did you guys know about me?" Carmen asked.

Drakus grinned. "I'll tell you why. When Black Sheep over here fumbled the final exam courtesy of Shadowsan here cheating her with an empty coat pocket, she decided to follow her class secretly. But when she saw her former classmate, Crackle, as I like to call him, Cracka-Lacka, was about to send someone off the census while the others tried to steal the goods, she stopped him and realized this was not the life she wanted, me personally, I would've taken some lives from the classmates myself. So, she snuck away after stealing a hard drive containing all their information, as well as her coat and hat from VILE's bookkeeper. The reason why I'm not with VILE is simple, they're rather...iffy...on what counts as acceptable losses of life, and it turns out literally stealing the Louvre draws way too much suspicion, so I ran as far as I could away from them." Carmen, Zack, and Ivy looked surprised and blinked.

"How does he know that?" Zack asked in shock.

"No one knows about any of that! Except maybe us." Ivy added.

"I may or may not have learned from some people talking about Black Sheep," Drakus said.

"Okay," Akko said, standing up. "Enough focusing on the past."

She turned to address the gathered council. "Instead, let's focus on my past!"

Shadows covered the whole vicinity, allowing everybody to see Akko's memories. Which, considering how bloody and violent they were, nobody wanted to.

"Back in World War II, Walter, Anna and I were part of a top-secret government operation called 'Ecto Control.' Walter and Anna were fifteen, we had a blast!"

Various images of gunfire and wire-cutting appeared in everyone's mind.

"We were under orders to stick it sideways to a group of scientist whack jobs interested in summoning a ghost army. And did we!"

"Seems you missed a spot," said Diana, which broke the illusion and the shadows.

"Are you- are you gonna do this now? In front of everybody?"

"The point is, one of the ghosts summoned escaped and is planning on world domination. The ghost established a sizable terrorist group, and that group's going by the name-"

All of a sudden, Cambot started to go off a bit as everyone turned. Crow blinked. "What's wrong, Cambot?"

All of a sudden, a projection activated in Cambot as the squad saw VERY familiar people staring at the screen.

Drakus gasped in pleasant surprise. "IT'S THE SHADOW HUNTERS, RALPH ZOCKMAN, A MOTH, A TV, AN E-GIRL, A GANGSTER, A DEMON, A LITERAL COWGIRL, A FALLEN ANGEL, A ROBO GIRL, SOME MAGES, A COYOTE, A LIVING FRACTION, A SMART BLONDE, A DEMON, A DEINOSUCHUS, AN ICHTHYORNIS, A ROBOLIZARD, A LUCHADORE, A DAN BACKSLIDE GENDERBEND, A BLUEBERRY MAN, A GREEN GIRL, A SCOTSMAN, A MONKEY, A FISHBOY, A FANGIRL, TWO ROBOCATS, AN ODDLY HOT MAN, A SWOLE BOY AND A BRITISH MAN!"

"MARIL AND MERRILL?!" Akko gasped.

"BOBO! BRAIN GUY! FRANK! ERHARDT! KINGA! MAXX! SOME DRAGON GUY WITH DR. FORESTER'S FACE!" Gypsy said.

"I think the last one you just mentioned is Dr. Forester." Tom whispered.

"Er, DR. F!" Gypsy gasped.

"Chief!" Tom said.

"McCloud!" Crow said.

"Are those the Mads you told us about?" Mystle asked.

"Yes, they are." Crow said, as everyone turned to the Mads. "I don't know HOW Dr. F turned into this OR where the newbies came from... they must have used whatever they got to hack into Cambot's system!"

Everyone watched as Dr. Forester and the Shadow Hunters started laughing... however, the sounds of them laughing were absent. Maril gave a smirk as she started mouthing words.

Powder blinked. "Uh... where's the sound?"

"Uh, Maril, excuse us!" Akko called, as Maril stopped in confusion. "Your microphones, they're not exactly working!"

Cinder blinked as she put on some glasses and started to examine the controls as Dr. Forester glared at Frank, who backed down.

"Maybe you should click on the button with the picture of the microphone, maybe?" Roman sighed.

"Well, this is the first time this has ever happened." Neo signed in shock.

"Hello?" Emerald's voice was called as she pushed a button, their images disappeared. "Hello?"

"Okay, yeah, we can hear you now... but NOW we cannot see you." Mera sighed.

"This could be annoying..." Kanade sighed.

"It's like talking to my uncle." Harkness rolled his eyes.

"So, what's going on?" A soft yet demonic-sounding voice came out of the TV.

"It's not working!" Mercury groaned.

"Did any of you click TV, then Power?"

"Oh, wait, it's on Video 2." Polly realized.

"Oh god, this is getting me right in my age." Lawton said, dramatically clutching his chest.

"The struggle is real here." Suzu agreed.

The Zoomers of the X-Squad looked at each other, wondering what in the hell was even happening.

"Oh, get it to Video 1."

Another button pressed, and the squad then saw someone dressed in a black coat and white mask getting the image back on. "Did I get it?" The person asked in a high-pitched girly voice.

"Yes!" Everyone said.

"Good, good." the girl smiled beneath her mask.

"Okay, let's start over." Dr. Forester said as Dr. Forrester did his evil laugh again, as the Shadow Hunters soon joined in.

"BOBO! BRAIN GUY! ERHARDT! FRANK! KINGA! MAXX! DR. F AS A DRAGON!" Gypsy gasped.

"Chief!" Tom said again.

"McCloud!" Crow laughed.

"MARIL! MERRILL!" Akko gasped.

"THE SHADOW HUNTERS AND RALPH ZOCKMAN!" Drakus said again, a cheeky grin on his face.

"It's Baxter! Stockman!" Networker snapped. "Oy very, you're as bad as the turtles!"

The group then started staring down, as an odd figure loomed at the front, lanky, clad in black pointed shoes and pants, with the shirt being white with black stripes, its face being mask-like in nature, but what caught people off guard was when his left hand came up, resembling a sock puppet in appearance.

"Hello~!" the strange being said, his hand moving as if he was making it talk.

Akko began laughing uproariously. "Holy moly, Adaru dropped the horror look and looks like a literal mime monster!" More laughter. "He looks like he came out of Power Rangers! Wait, wait! No, no, Ghostbusters! Ghostbusters!"

"Ah, if it isn't the memorable Akko." the ghost said, taking the comments in stride. "Her provider, the young Sir Cavendish, the bean-counters, the riffing bots, the X-Squad, and of course- very interesting to see, by the way- the Vatican. How does it feel to work with your sworn enemies, Father Maxwell?"

Enrico Maxwell looked at the ghost with a cold, dull expression. "Not as painful as your obnoxious ego."

"Ah, don't be like that," Adaru said, the sock puppet hand now smiling cheekily. "I used to be good friends with the Vatican. Remember how you in particular aided me in being summoned to the mortal plane, in exchange for me helping you overthrow that Pope Francis dude, due to that guy getting rid of the old testaments, and also for being a humble, caring, accepting man who cared for less fortunate folk, was willing to sit in a wooden chair instead of a golden seat, and was perfectly okay with people of unconventional sexuality existing? Either way, you act like you're gonna be big and bad, but in actuality, you're a daft cunt messing with forces beyond even your comprehension all to inflate your ego."

The bishop's expression went from neutral to terrified in an instant as he saw a mass of black...something...below him.

"Oh, wait, were they not supposed to know that?" Adaru asked, the tone making it clear the ghost was enjoying every bit of Maxwell's terror due to being outed as the one who kept Adaru from being captured.

"Wait!" the bishop cried as the tendrils, surging out of the darkness dragged him down into it, grabbing all of his limbs and clothes as he tried to pry the tendrils off him. "Adaru, I don't deserve this!"

"You said it yourself. Sinners won't be allowed no quarter. Kill them all, and let God sort them out." Adaru said, smirking.

Maxwell cried in agony as he got dragged into the darkness, his screams turning into gurgles as the darkness enveloped his body, consuming him alive, as everyone looked on, either shocked, perplexed, or happy that he was literally dead and gone.

"So that's how he knew about you being summoned?" asked Diana, who was two seconds away from feeding Maxwell to Akko and Russell before Adaru ate Maxwell, as Amanda quickly leapt down in a swarm of bible pages, only to see the puddle where Maxwell was standing.

"I'm not mad at whatever did this to you, Maxwell," said Amanda, looking down at the puddle. "But I am sorry that you lost your life to it."

---

Amanda, currently a young girl in training, looked over to see a young boy, older than her no less, with cold eyes, a dark expression under the warm sunset light.

"And what has brought YOU to our sanctuary of love and brotherhood, my boy?" her mentor, Alexander Anderson, asked with a smile.

"I have a terrible guilt and rage inside me that can only be quelled by the blood and subjugation of the unclean!" he said.

"...Oh ho! You'll fit right in!"

---

Amanda detached herself from her memories, bringing her mind back to the present. The present being the puddle that Maxwell was dragged into. Out of respect, she put a rose on top of it, as the puddle receded, taking the rose with it.

"You were a good brother in arms, Maxwell. Shame you were such a shit man."

Adaru cheekily grinned. "But of course. Oh, and remember me, Lute, or should I say, Lyre?"

Lute let out an incoherent scream and lunged for the ghost, but, since it was simply a screen, she crashed into another pile of snow.

"You can't call me by that peasant name any more!" Lute snarled, face twisted in fury.

"I think I can, seeing as you remember me rather well." Adaru said. "Lyre."

Lute leapt for the screen again, as Adaru laughed at Lute's failure to try and strangle him.

"Does someone want to explain this "Lyre" thing?" Iris asked.

"Lute's merely a title." Adaru replied. "As in, Lieutenant. It started as a nickname that Adam gave to his most favourite exorcist. Mostly only until he grew bored of them, or they couldn't tolerate him any more. Usually, that only took a couple of years, but Lyre here was such a pathetic little pick me that she clung on for centuries."

"Don't call me Lyre." Lute said. "Or I swear by all that's holy I'll rip your throat apart. My name's Lute! Lute!"

Adaru shook his head.

"And who are you lieutenant to, Lyre?"

Lute's breath caught in her throat. She opened her mouth, closed it again, her chest heaving.

"Um, anyways... I like to introduce our new players... you know them, Dr. Clayton Forester, as well as Maril and Merrill Cavendish, Baxter Stockman, and Dawn Mooney, descendant of Edward Marshall Mooney, the Whistling Gambler?" Megafin then smiled.

"Hello, pussycats... how do you like my new look?" Forester smiled.

"You look like Diablo..." Deckard blinked.

"Quiet, old man! I wasn't referring to you!" Clayton glared.

"Anyway, you've no doubt already been acquainted with the beautiful Sync City?" Dawn said, chuckling.

"I know we have!" Bobo smiled.

"Do be quiet, Bobo." Megafin frowned.

"Sorry, Lawgiver." Bobo said, backing down.

"Anyway, I'm sure you're chomping at the bit to find out what we have in store for you, no?" Adaru said dramatically.

"You're planning on working with VILE to find the Black Soulstone, and use it to find the Whistling Gambler's treasure." Diana said immediately.

Deckard gasped. "You'll bring back the Frozen King if you do so!"

Adaru and the Shadow Hunters stopped smiling, and looked confused, not really expecting that response. "Wow, just…kill all the fun. Put the fun in camps, why don't you?" Kronos retorted.

"Yeah, fun-Nazi," Akko said.

"Get to the fucking point!" shouted Diana, losing her patience with everyone around her.

"Well, mind me if it seems a little too unoriginal for you, but at some time, some place, something will attack you." Adaru said. "Maybe. Probably. Could be happening right now. You would know about surprise attacks, right Akko?"

"Hell yeah I do- wait, is that a Pearl Harbor joke?"

"Fingers crossed!" Drakus said gleefully.

"Well, sad to say, your plan already failed." Mallory glared, pulling out a small red shard. "We already have one of the shards secured, that of Diablo, and we'll be using it to track down the others before you even arrive."

"You have? Why did we call you then? Weird..." Maril paused. "Oh, wait, maybe it was to show you THIS!"

Clayton smirked as he pulled out a tracking device. "My newest invention! This is a Soulstone Tracker! It can track the Black Soulstone's shards anywhere in our worlds OR this one! And the best part is... it can teleport anybody to where the shard is!"

The squad gasped.

"Holy shit..." Akira muttered.

"That is a faster method, isn't it?" Stocking muttered.

"Well... this could be a fun competition..." Mera paused.

"Or trouble..." Tom groaned.

"Oh, but the party is just getting started!" Kinga smirked. "Once we get Dad's old body back, and we get your shard after we get the others, we will enslave all of the omniverse... while you guys can sit back and watch more crappy movies... or fanfictions, whichever one we decide... that we can pick out!"

"We're just getting started on this adventure!" Dr. Forester laughed. "Now, if you EXCUSE us, we're going to go find our first element... I believe it found the Soulstone of Belial!"

Deckard gasped. "The Lord of Lies!"

"Well, we've said about all we have to say. And just like that...the race begins! Push the button, Frank!" Megafin ordered.

"Just like old times!" Frank smiled as he pushed a button... he paused as he tried to push the button. "Wait, Dr. F, which one is the button to hang up?"

"I don't know..." Dr. Forester said as he examined it. "Uh, which one is the button?"

"Sheesh, don't you know?" Dawn groaned as she pushed up her mask, revealing a fairly teenage girl with frazzled white hair and a pink left eye and a blue right eye, and put on some glasses.

"Let me see that..." Merrill frowned. "We should really label these..."

"Is it this one?" Valentino pointed.

"I don't know..." Networker blinked.

"Is it this on-" Mechagodzilla said as he pushed a nearby button and THAT was the hang-up button as Cambot reactivated again.

"I CANNOT BELIEVE," Lute, or rather, Lyre, snapped, "that ASSHOLE managed to MAKE A LITERAL SHARD TRACKER –"

And Lyre would've continued griping until two sharp claps drew her attention to Fish Mooney.

"We can stand here all day talking about how we're gonna either exact vengeance or ask them if they want coffee at the next meetup," she stated. "But, that's going to do us no good at all unless we can actually manage to get into a position to do it. Our focus now should be on either getting the shards and bong first or making our way to confront them."

"I simply find it difficult to believe he has managed to get a Soulstone Tracker!" Deckard said. "Surely, Belial will put an end to him the moment he sets foot near his."

"Not if the Tracker has the ability to strip them of power," Doom reminded. "I doubt Forester would be so foolish."

"I don't," Crow piped up. "He's an idiot."

"I'm standing in a room full of witches and mages," Fish reminded them. "Can no one tell me anything about how his enchantment functions?"

"Wait wait wait," Bane said suddenly. "There's something familiar about this." He snapped his fingers; "Okay, got it. Mechainfinite had something like this to counter magic wielders called a Snapback Wave. Suppresses magic in general; has a central location in a device that can, in fact, be destroyed."

"Except that tracker seems more magical," Garie stated. "There's a whole lotta power that went into this. All the same, a principle's a principle. If the more scientific version is centered within a machine, then this spell has to be contained within an artifact. After all…" She brushed her fingers over her neck. "Carol's well aware of the concept of a central object, uses it all the time, after all."

"Thinking logically, Forester and his lot are canny, yet not to a meticulous degree," Doom mused. "It would be safest to assume that the object is within the Tracker, where they have security placed to prevent anyone from disturbing it. They would focus more on making the defenses ostentatious than they would on making the item difficult to find, such as hiding it in a different city or burying it across the world."

"Then that brings our objectives down to one," Fish stated. "Get the shards before they do. What do we have to expect?"

"Oy vey…" Bibury sighed, bridging her nose. "I'll hand it to them, this group knows their epic poetry, that's for sure. This is a bookworm plan. Only a complete and total dork would put this together. See, we're in Sync City, right? And what epic poem does anyone know that takes place in Troy?"

"The Iliad, I think," Mystle answered.

"And what is the sequel to The Iliad?" Drakus realized. "Do I hear you say ODYSSEY? 'Cause that's the game here! We wanna get the shards, and we're gonna have to survive an Odysseus run to do so, only instead of cannibals, cyclopes, and sirens galore, it's bad movies, riffs and Yokai galore!" He let out a long, drawn-out sigh. "I hate this so much."

The elderly scholar, now known as Deckard, spoke briefly about Leoric and his downfall. Additionally, he mentions the Deadly Six being demons with great influence, sealed away long ago. Effects from those entities still linger in the present day. Since the Deadly Six have risen, to plunge the world into darkness once more, Deckard told the squad about his plan.

"I believe the key to defeating Zazz and securing a way to find the Soulstone Shards, is through Leoric's crown," Deckard said.

"The king's crown?" Cyclonis questioned.

"We need it," the scholar replied. "So that we may bring Leoric to help banish the foul beasts."

"So it will hitch him back to his real body, correct?" Mera asked.

Deckard nodded. "It is at the Sleepy Marrow Cemetery, you should try looking through the many crypts."

As the squad took their leave, Deckard observed the squad's various armors. 'You and your band are quite the foreigner, Malthael.' The man thought. 'Never in my life have I seen that knight's armor. Where are you from? What is your home?'

"You want a guide? You got it!" A familiar voice exclaims as the Lord of Terror, Diablo, appeared...or in this case, a short girl clad in a red and black trenchcoat, an orange shirt and black jeans.

"GAHHHHH!" Most of everyone exclaimed in alarm by this.

"A demon!" Gypsy exclaimed with a whimper.

"Well, there's Diablo." Mystle said. She noticed something off. "You look..."

"Human? I know. My magic fused with that Clayton jerk." Diablo scoffed as she crossed her arms, pouting like a baby. "Me. The Lord of Terror, having my magic hijacked."

"Right now, we're involved in the End Times." Deckard explained, making Diablo arch an eyebrow at this. "You know of this?"

"Sounds familiar to me...sort of..."

"We need to find a way to locate the rest of the Soulstone Shards before our enemies do." Mystle explained. "But we don't know how to get to."

"Well, I may not be in control of my magic, but I can hack into Forester's mind...and know where he's heading." Diablo explained, much to everyone's delight.

"Then we'll have to rely on you to guide us to them," Drakus said. "I trust you will lead us well."

"You want help? We're there!" Roman exclaimed with a smile. "No one gets their hands on world-ending death shards!"

"We're with you guys one hundred percent!" Iris said, holding up a brave face.

"Shoot, I won't back out of this!" Scarlett exclaimed, looking determined to help out.

"Well, the last thing I want is to live in a world that is going to hell in a hand basket." Cheri said, moving her hair up. "So count me in."

"Well, I prefer not to go demon hunting..." Opal said, before smirking. "But...if it means not being stuck watching cheesy movies, I'll help."

Just then, two other girls. One had lank spaghetti-blond strands and a slithery lizard tail poking out from the waistband of her skinny jeans. The second girl seemed to be suffering from acute, ugly cute, split personality disorder. Head to toe, one half of her was all gloom and goth, the other all perky and pep squad. Like a cheerleader crossed with a Twihard. Which was an oddly adorable combo, like a pug-beagle puggle. (Cheri would know: She volunteered at an animal shelter.)

"And sides, I got some super besties to back us up." Opal added.

"You do?" Mystle furrowed her brow. "Where?" She sprang straight up, scanning the hallway for more superheroes. Maybe they were invisible. Maybe that's why she couldn't see them.

"Duh, these two were from my bad guy days." Opal rolled her eyes, then jerked her head back toward the two mutant girls.

"Meet Karyn Karson, K-Liz for short-"

Karyn curled her thin lips into a smile, a forked tongue flicking out between her fangs, as Cheri blushed deeply, as Karyn, oddly enough, looked like she was trying her best to be scary and yet looked cute.

"-and BellaBritney." Opal hitched her thumb at the dour cheerleader.

"Bella-" Kanade began.

"-Britney?" Karlo completed.

"Well, I like this Bella better." Akko said.

"Ugh," the gothy Bella side mumbled through a half-mouth of black lipstick at the exact same moment the hyper Britney side cheered, "Yay!" with a wave of her single pompom, It was jarring and oddly endearing, to say the least. Vader let out a confused breath.

"Those two?" Drakus said, astonished. (He wasn't quite sure if BellaBritney counted as one whole or two halves or what.) "What did you get up to?"

"O2 is back in business!" Opal laughed.

The ground shook, and if anyone bothered to look out their windows, they might have noticed a black storm cloud hovering just above the girl. "Opaline plus two," she said, directly at Drakus. "O2. Dioxide. Maybe you're familiar with it? It's a key ingredient in sunscreen." Opal snickered. "It blocks UV rays."

"In-ter-ception!" BellaBritney half-cheered again, as if she were at a football game, as Scarlet blushed deeply, realizing that, now that she thought about it, BellaBrittney looked oddly...adorable.

"Here's the thing," Krell told Drakus. "It'd take us a lot less time to do the run than Odysseus, seein' as we're not gonna do anything STUPID like open a windbag or get ourselves locked in a horny goddess' basement for a decade and a half. That said, I don't know if you remember this little detail, but we are, at the moment, kinda low on energy."

"Is this really what you believe to be the extent of your skill?" Katz sniffed. "Your magic, enhancements, even genetics? Perhaps such shallow fripperies are what allow these Deadlight fops to boast, but when you remove the trappings, you are, at the very core, friends with a Drakonian, your hearts strong and minds sharp!"

"Mostly," Russell said, flicking a glance to where Mystle was attempting to lift Weiss up to kiss her.

"They will rue the day they thought they could fuck with the X-Squad," Drakus hissed. "They underestimate us! And I will not have any single one of you doing the same."

"The robots should come with you as well." Deckard said to the squad.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait," Diablo said as everyone looked at her. "Are you telling us that these guys are joining them on this quest to keep my sibs out of the mitts of those creeps? These... movie riffers?"

"So?" Crow shrugged. "What's the problem?"

"They know about the monsters or anything from their films then we do." Deckard explained to Diablo in concern. "If anything from them appear to harm you, they will give out the information."

"They aren't fighters, more like hecklers!" Diablo exclaimed with a frown, crossing her arms. "I know, I read Forrester's mind and saw his opinion of them."

"Well, hey, give us a chance." Crow said. "We can fight when we can...and the inventions we got from Jonah, Emily, and Joel can give us the advantage."

"Well, fine. Whatever."

"Come on, guys, we've got Adventure Sign!" Tom smiled.

"What?" Karyn hissed.

"Sorry, being holed in the Satellite of Love too long, you'd get used to these sort of things!" Crow said as everyone started to head out for adventure, and Fish thought that she would've had a harder time of saying it better herself, though not an impossible time.

Just then, a message appeared, startling everyone. Drakus grabbed it and opened it. The Drakonian looked it over, gasping in shock.

"Uh, what's wrong?" Mystle asked, noting the look on her friend's face.

"The crown's in the cross hairs of a new enemy." Drakus said. He spun to the robots, asking, "So, any of you know anyone named Fu Manchu?"

The robots' eyes widen in horror. They looked at each other...and screamed like pansies.

---

The bad guys were at the area where the Soulstone Shard of Lies was possibly at, a Scottish castle in the sky. Erhardt groaned, giving out a look of jealousy towards Frank. He couldn't believe Forester went and replaced him like that! What kind of a friend is he?! Not only that, but the scientist didn't tell him about anything else, like his daughter, etc.

Well, Dr. Erhardt is determined to get his position as Forester's sidekick back no matter what.

"Hey, guys...perhaps we should keep track of our enemies." Dr. Earhardt spoke up, getting the others' attention. "That way, we can give them distractions."

"Well, Laurence...for someone who has been gone for a while...you came up with a brilliant idea." Forester said thoughtfully. "Hey, Brainiac!"

"It's Brain Guy." Brain Guy said to Forester dryly.

"How about giving out a distraction for the robots and the misfits?"

Brain Guy paused as he made two portals appear, showing the matter at Sync City and the empire of Fu Manchu. He blinked in surprise. "Apparently, they would be visiting with something called Fu Manchu at the moment."

"Fu Manchu?!" TV's Frank gasped, making a horrified scream.

"There is no need to scream," a dry and slightly posh voice said, drawing the attention of the Shadow Hunters.

The man who approached them had blonde hair, glasses, and a non-descript face. He wore a simple blue suit and red tie, and though he was in the presence of extraterrestrial and mystical beings, he didn't seem phased in the slightest.

"And just who are YOU?!" Dil asked.

"Owen Burnett," he replied. "And, if you don't mind, Mr. Xanatos has been expecting you. Please, follow me."

The Fearcats exchanged a confused glance. This Xanatos character had been expecting them? But how could that be? And just what exactly were they walking into? Flurious seemed equally perplexed, but there was no way the Fearcats were going to let so interesting of an opportunity slip through their fingers. They followed Owen into the castle, and he led them down into the skyscraper to a large office looking out at the city.

The office was largely empty aside from a single desk sitting directly under a spotlight, the only light in the room. Sitting at the desk was a man with dark brown hair worn back into a ponytail. He was dressed in a black and dark gray suit, and his lips seemed to be curled into a perpetual smirk. The Fearcats assumed that this man was the aforementioned Xanatos that Owen had mentioned, a fact they confirmed upon spotting the nameplate reading "David Xanatos" on the desk. But that wasn't the only item of note on the desk...

"The Terror Shisha!" the Fearcats yelled in unison.

"Give it to us, NOW!" Mig ordered.

"All in good time," Xanatos said as he got up from his desk and stepped in between the Fearcats and the waterpipe. "But first, I went to quite a lot of trouble to get your attention, and here you are!"

"You wanted our attention?" Kronos asked. "That's why you somehow stole the Terror Shisha?! Well newsflash, buddy, we didn't learn that it got yoinked till now."

"And from there, things couldn't have proceeded more predictably," Xanatos said proudly. "A simple invitation likely would have gone unheeded, but I knew once word got out that your precious artifact had been stolen, you wouldn't rest until you had it back in your position."

"Standing in between a Fearcat and what they want is foolish," Mig said. "You must care very little for your life."

"On the contrary, my life is of the utmost concern for me," Xanatos said, "as you can plainly see."

Xanatos held up his left hand and twiddled his fingers, drawing attention to the silver and green ring worn around his finger. The ring bore the same exact markings as Magnifico's Spellbook and the Terror Shisha.

"His ring! It must have come from the same source as the other artifacts!" Megafin pointed out. "Where did you get that?!"

"It's been... an eventful past few months," Xanatos answered. "Now can we have that talk?"

"You have five minutes," Mig warned.

"Fair enough," Xanatos agreed. "About three months ago, while away on a business trip in Scotland, I was the victim of a car bombing. I have no shortage of enemies, and unfortunately this particular one opted for a crude yet effective attack that escaped my notice. The bombing left me broken and bleeding out on the concrete; I could feel the cold hands of death creeping closer to me."

The Fearcats and some of the Shadow Hunters grinned wickedly at the mental image. If there was one thing that never failed to bring them unmitigated joy, it was a good bombing.

"As my imminent death was upon me, a strange looking pterodactyl, don't know how it survived the extinction event 65 million years ago, appeared beside me," Xanatos continued. "He told me he could save my life and grant me immortality as well. I'd been seeking immortality for years, you must understand, but I never wanted to get it through a deal with a supernatural entity. Too many ways it can go wrong. However, I was dying and desperate, and so I made the deal with him. He gave me this ring, and in a matter of seconds, I was healed. Good as new! And my... erm... supernatural contacts confirmed that the ring's power did indeed make me immortal."

"But who was the dino?" Calamity asked eagerly. "We must know!"

"I didn't learn his name until later," Xanatos answered, "but I was told the dino was a demon dubbed Rai Xin, Demon Sorcerer of Sound."

The Shadow Hunters all exchanged a look. They all knew what that meant. Rai Xin has been making deals long before Deadlight was formed.

"The power of this ring had certain additional benefits," Xanatos continued. "One of the most notable was that it helped me to become a mage, more specifically of demonic magic. My wife was perturbed by the changes I had undergone and eventually fled with our son back to her mother on Avalon. It was for the best. Fox wouldn't want Alex to see what hell I'll bring, and now that I have finally achieved immortality, I have no use for an heir."

The Fearcats recognized Xanatos' cavalier attitude as a part of the same corrupting magic from the spellbook and shisha. The magic preyed upon one's darkest impulses and somewhat amplified them. Best of all, there was no reversing its effects. Once undergone, the corruption of the soul was permanent. So it was with the Fearcats, so it was with Magnifico, and now so it (somewhat, apparently you can be corrupted by dark magic and still care for family) was with Xanatos.

"But though the ring certainly has had countless benefits, I am not blind to what it is and what it could be," Xanatos explained. "Being under the thrall of a demon isn't exactly how I'd hoped to spend my immortal life. A little birdy clued me into a few helpful hints about a magical shisha with the same markings as my ring. When I learned that the shisha had been claimed by the allies of Rai Xin, my opening became clear."

Xanatos picked up the Terror Shisha and held it in front of him.

"So, here's the trade off," Xanatos said. "You get the Terror Shisha back in exchange for arranging an audience with Rai Xin. That should hardly be asking too much. I think he'll be interested. Don't you?"

Mig groaned. "Does this mean we don't get to murder anyone today?"

"Such a disappointment!" Benglo sighed. "But we can't refuse this deal. Come with us, Xanatos. We'll introduce you to the boss."

"Excellent!" Xanatos declared as he handed over the Terror Shisha to Mig. "Come along, Owen. I think he'll be quite pleased to see you too."

"Yes, Mr. Xanatos, of course," Owen said politely.

The Fearcats didn't know why Rai Xin would have an interest in Xanatos's servant, but that wasn't their business. McGlitch and Rai Xin could decide what to make of them on their own. They'd done their part in uncovering the source of the spellbook, and they'd recovered the Terror Shisha in the process. Mission accomplished!

"Wait," Quilla said as she turned back to Xanatos. "It seems you've snuck a member of Oberon's Court into this world. An audacious move."

"Not at all!" Xanatos shook his head. "Owen here is my servant, not Oberon's. Not anymore, anyway. In fact, I thought you might be able to help him."

"Lemme guess, Rai Xin can fix that rock hand Owen has?" Kronos asked. "Surely a... Pretty Person...still feels weird to say that...has the power to undo a simple petrification."

"It is not the hand that needs fixing," Owen said. "This state was willingly accepted. Mr. Xanatos is referring to the fact that Lord Oberon bound me to human form for failing to attend his Gathering. I was... banished from Avalon for disobeying him."

"We've that in common," Circe said as she walked over to him, "as you certainly already know. But it would not do for us to be unable to speak face to face. I shall undo the vainglorious fool's curse."

Circe extended her arms outward, and her hands began to glow with pink magic.

"Bound to flesh and bound to bone, bound to a mortal hand of stone," Circe began to chant. "Such a fate shall not remain, and true form at last thou shalt regain. Oberon's commands you'll no longer obey, and once again be able to become a fae!"

Pink magic began to swirl around Owen like a burning pink tornado, ripping at his flesh and burning away the authority of Oberon's magic. For a moment, Owen feared that Maleficent's spell would tear his flesh apart to try and restore what Oberon had denied him, but he soon felt the rush of magic and his old power returning. He grinned mischievously as he became as he once was.

"Heeeeeere's Puck!" he declared as his true form returned.

"Oh no, not him. He's the craziest Pretty Person out there." Quilla groaned.

"The trickster of the Pretty People, Puck," Circe said, smirking. "I see the ages have not been kind."

"Seriously, we're still saying Pretty People when talking about...them?" Cassiopeia looked insulted at the name. "We're literally talking about Owen here being an old fai-" With a crack of teleportation Quilla was in Cassiopeia's face, her eyes slitted like serpents. "Shutting up now."

"Good." The other mare backed up into Ink Blotch, as Quilla shook it off, as Xanatos and Puck looked confused about this. "...Word of the wise, Dave, you don't wanna invoke their true name, the Fair Folk are not to be messed with. Erebus here should know, he crossed them once, and blammo, he's a shadow being."

"Uh-oh, looks like we've got another trickster running around," Killian teased as he leaned over to 2/3.

"I can't tell you what a relief it is to be myself again," Puck said as he flew around the room, stretching his limbs. "Playing Owen is fun, don't get me wrong, but it's so boring being trapped in just one form."

"And now I've restored what you lost helping me stand against Oberon," Xanatos said. "I hope this eliminates any hard feelings you may have had."

Puck giggled at that. "What a funny thing to say, Xanatos! You of all people know the price of doing business, and any fate that was inflicted upon me was due to my own choices, not yours. You can take credit for many things, but the Puck is never one to be robbed of his due credit!"

Xanatos smirked. "I'll be sure to remember that going forward."

"But let's also be perfectly clear," Puck warned. "You chose a lifetime of service from Owen, not Puck. I fully intend to continue to honor our deal, but even though I can become the Puck again at my own discretion, my services in this form don't come part of your package deal."

"But they will come as a part of mine," Circe chimed in. "I have restored you to your true form, and the price of my generosity is your aid in my cause."

"Knew those strings were coming," Puck sighed, "but, as you wish. The Puck is now in the service of Deadlight. Wouldn't exactly call myself evil like the rest of you, but I do like mischief. I think we can find a mutually beneficial and fun way to use my talents."

Puck winked at Erebus to make his meaning plain, and Erebus couldn't suppress a smirk. Oh yes, the two of them would be able to create glorious chaos together, and everyone present knew it well.

"A new fae to count amongst Deadlight is indeed a welcome gift," Megafin agreed, "but I believe we were here to discuss the matter of David Xanatos himself before this... distraction."

"Wait a sec!" Magnifico yelled. "Uhhhh...Stockman, was it, you were talking about finding a way to be a fly again...may I ask why?"

"Well, why do you think I never de-mutated myself when I was under my Shredder?" Networker asked. "Okay, sure, I was super disgusting, but I was smarter, faster, stronger. People actually liked me as a bug!"

"Okay then, who's Fu Manchu?"

"Another villain from a bad film played by Christopher Lee." Forester explained to the former king, rolling his eyes. "His movie almost drove Joel and the robots...along with me and Frank at the end of the experiment...crazy."

"Ah hah. Looks like we got our distraction." Kinga remarked. "But maybe we can give Mr. Manchu a helping hand. Brain Guy? Keep an eye on them...give them some distractions."

"Yes, madam." Brain Guy said with a nod. As the villains kept on walking, the Observer kept on keeping an eye, planning to use any distractions with his powers.

---

Continuing forward, the squad reached the cemetery, with Zack and Ivy staying outside in case the squad needed a getaway vehicle. Mallory pushed the old, warped metal of the gates, granting access to it later. Fortunately, there was another waypoint in the cemetery.

'Mr. Eamon said his grandfather was in a tomb.' Iris thought. She looked around the cemetery, thinking to herself again. 'Wait, there are four different entrances. Mr. Eamon, you forgot which one, didn't you?' Iris exhaled.

Ultimately, an entrance was eventually picked. The squad decided to clear all four, since the blacksmith did not mention more than one tomb. The squad encountered short, little spirits that ran away from them. Some of them moved to bite Mallory. This was a foolish action, as the angel of death extended her arm, stopping the spirit with her hand. Its arms flailed like a child. She kicked the little thing into another one, yet it was still alive. In return, the other spirits ran back toward the squad to attack.

Only to be shot by slips of paper, which made the spirits flicker out of sight.

Then with no further adieu, the savior revealed herself.

The squad watched with awe how elegant the Hakurei shrine maiden walked towards them, with grace and poise...

...And then the mystical mood gets ruined by the sound of someone making a loud entrance.

"HELLO DADDY! HELLO MOM! I'M YOUR CH-CH-CH-CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB!"

Eyebrows raised and eyes wide open in confusion, everyone turned toward the torii arch where the loud singing came from.

Ascending the steps is a blonde girl wearing a black pointy hat with an equally black leather coat over a black blouse and pants. Strapped to the side of her waist is a rectangular mechanical device in which the loud song she is singing along with is coming from.

"HELLO WORLD, I'M YOUR WILD GIRL! I'M YOUR CH-CH-CH-CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB!"

The Stardust Witch, Marisa G. Kirisame, continued to loudly sing along with her song-playing device for several more seconds, with everyone in the crypt watching in utter confusion.

Then the song suddenly went out, and Marisa's singing came to a halt with it.

"The heck?" Marisa wondered what just happened, as she grabbed the song-playing device and raised it up to her face for a close inspection. "Why'd it..."

"Y'know, ya kinda look large in this getup of-" Drakus chipped while at it.

The Drakonian suddenly found himself being grabbed by the collar of his shirt by Reimu.

"I can expla-" Drakus tried to say, but was interrupted when the shrine maiden started to shake him furiously.

"DID YOU JUST CALL ME FAT?!" Reimu yelled furiously at the top of her voice as she continued shaking the Drakonian.

"Hold on, I'm sorry, but seriously, add some teal and pink!" Drakus tried to talk to Reimu, but the shrine maiden continued to shake him with utmost anger.

Meanwhile, the squad continued to stare dumbfounded at the event unfolding before their eyes.

Soon, beyond already opened iron gates was an extremely faded carpet, leading to a large set of doors.

'This has to be the Chancellor's crypt.' Mallory thought.

As she got closer, the Ashen One could hear something being attacked. The doors in front of the squad and their two new allies were denting. Then, the locked entrance broke. A large horde made itself known. A strong yellow aura pulsed around the horde. As a loud buzzing is heard, getting everyone's attention. Mystle asked nervously, "What is that loud buzzing?"

"Wait, it sounds familiar." Tom said in concern. Where had he heard that buzzing before?

"INCOMIN'!" Harkness screamed, as he saw something.

The gang yelped as something rushed by. As they got down, the squad gasped as a human-sized mantis-like creature flew overheard beside the fairies, roaring in fury.

"Mantis!" Nanaue cried out in shock.

"Ayo!" Some of the group exclaimed in shock. The gang watched as the Deadly Mantis flew back, preparing for another run.

The Prehistoric Insectoid Predator

Deadly Mantis

"Eh heh heh... Hi there, how would you like a sho-"

Some of the Fairies weren't even able to move another muscle before Lugnut stepped on them.

"Careful, cyclops! You stepped in something!" Hothead Blitzwing yelled, before switching to Random Blitzwing. "But with a few dancing lessons, you'll be light on your stabilizing servos like me! Cha, cha, cha!"

"Silence Blitzwing! I am not standing out here for dancing lessons!" Lugnut snapped, kicking the fairies off his left foot.

"Ohhh mercy," Russell said, his voice shaking.

"Russell, are you okay?" Fish asked, growing a bit concerned.

As swiftly as a speeding bullet, Russell rushed towards the fairies that Lugnut stepped on, as the squad heard the fairies crying out for help along with ravenous slurping coming from Russell, as the fairies all disintegrated.

"Ho... ly... FUCK!" Russell exclaimed. "I feel like I could prance naked in the sunlight!"

"Spare us the mental image," Bella muttered.

"What's going on with him?" Clementine asked, utterly confused.

"FAIRY BLOOD!" Russell exclaimed. "It's like suckin' from the titties of God!"

"The blood of light fae is a delicacy for vampires," Drakus explained. "Allows them to walk in the sun but with the caveat that they become... drunk."

"Is there more?" Russell asked.

"Is that all ya got?!" Marisa taunted as she spun her magic wand.

As soon as Marisa finished her taunt, a hundred more fairies appeared from all over the place and surrounded everyone.

"You had to ask..." Reimu chided Marisa and Russell for jinxing the situation.

"At least we ain't fightin' Ultron..." The witch said sheepishly.

"Here's an idea." Kremy said nervously.

"What?"

"LEG IT AND SHOOT LIKE HELL!"

The gang ran through the door with the Deadly Mantis and fairies in hot pursuit, as the squad fired everything they got at them.

"Run, run for your life!" Mario called out to Feathers, tossing him a silver BlastCell, as Clementine grabbed a nearby plasma gun.

Fairies are dumb, mischievous, annoying, forgetful, and weak. Everyone living in Gensyoko knows that (except the fairies themselves).

But everyone also knows that fairies will, for some reason, become more aggressive when there's a major Incident going on. And that is exactly the case right now, with the Scarlet Mist making the fairies aggressive in their attacks against the squad, Reimu and Marisa.

The squad was hunkered down as danmaku began to fly from every direction, especially from Reimu and Marisa as they fired back at the fairies.

Beyond the squad was a large room. At the end of it was an old crown, resting on a pillow. Before the squad could even walk up to the hooded statue holding it, they got pushed back. A shield made of fog formed around the crown. From that area, streaks of ghostly energy poured out behind him, which quickly turned to static.

"Remember me?!" An oddly British voice said, as a tall and thin humanoid, with a gray 50s/60s television box head appeared. His real face was a white static-like background with differently shaped eyes, with one big and one small, along with a large grin taking up most of his lower face. His teeth's colors, which were yellow, cyan, lime green, pink, red, and blue, seemed to resemble a TV's color bars. The bottom edge of his head had the word "Puzzlevision" printed on it. He wore a black bowler hat with a gray band on his head, with two TV antennas sticking out, though one was bent. He was clad in a grey vest with a white undershirt and a black bow tie, as well as white elongated four fingered rubber hose gloves and black and white dress sneakers. His pants were dark grey, with silver puzzle patterns, his pants also come with suspenders with grey puzzle pieces as buttons. His pants are also a tad bit short and thin black legs are visible if one looks closer. "DID YOU REALISE WHO YOU'RE MESSING WITH?! THIS WHOLE FIASCO TOOK SMG4 AND HIS CREW AWAY FROM MY SHOW! AND EVEN NOW, YOU DARE MESS WITH MY HOPES?! MY DREAMS?! I'm bringing SMG4 AND HIS LITTLE GROUP back to my show… AND THEN… I'LL FINALLY BE ABLE TO ACHIEVE—"

Suddenly, a paper shuriken hit the TV man's screen, as the man yelped in pain.

"ACK! WHICH ONE OF YOU BRUTES DID THIS?! I JUST CLEANED THIS SCREEN!" The TV man yelled, somehow not realizing that the X-Squad looked confused.

"This guy tried to put you on TV?" Drakus asked.

"Yo, turn on The Owl House, I'm on Season 2 and was wondering what's next." Tom cheekily said.

"NO! NO TV! YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!" The TV man snapped.

Soon, a strong yellow aura covered the TV man, who held his hands out, as if to bring Mallory closer. Then, a ghostly energy tethered itself from Mallory, toward the TV man. Her life force was being drained. Yet upon this action, he noticed something.

"Oh right, undead..." The TV man deduced.

Just then, stepping into the light, was a slender, fair-skinned young Japanese woman, possibly in her late teens to early 20s, with long hair with straight bangs that had been split-dyed into two shades of blue - navy-blue on the right and aqua-blue on the left. Her hair was styled into buns that vaguely resemble horns. She also had dark brown sanpaku eyes, multicolored-nails, and makeup which consisted of thick eyeliner and plum-purple lipstick on her plump lips, and was clad in an extravagant, neon-green leather jacket with small dark silver spikes on the shoulders and around the cuffs, dark silver studs on the front and on the popped collar, as well as a blue and orange patch sewn on the right side. Under her jacket, she had on a navy-blue stealth-suit which has a design of an orange "V" on the center and a round dull-silver zipper hanging from the high collar. She also wore thigh-high dull-purple platform boots with darker-colored soles and accessorized purple utility straps: one around her right thigh and two around her left thigh, with three of them having buckles which sport a similar design to the zipper on her suit, as the girl smirked. "Impressive." she said.

"Wow, how did we not notice her?" Kanade asked herself.

"Paper Star," Carmen said, nonchalant, "After the crown for VILE?"

"You know us so well, Carmen." Paper Star replied.

"Well, you're gonna have a hard time getting it with us around!" Mystle said.

"That's why I'm not alone," Paper Star chuckled. "I see you brought friends." Paper Star then smirked. "Ooo, I like the colors... Who are you supposed to be?"

"We're the X-Squad!" Sora introduced.

"What a cute name... I'll make sure they write it on your tombstones!" Paper Star threw her paper shurikens, and the Skylandian narrowly dodged each one.

"Ha! Not a scratch on me!" Sora said, only for one of her curls to fall off, "Oh."

"You should run now..." the assassin threw more shurikens at Ridley, who jumped, flipped, and cartwheeled around to avoid them before grabbing a chair and shielding himself with it.

Ridley got a look at the shurikens to see the material, "Well, didn't know paper could be so deadly." he tossed the chair aside, "But you're not the only one with unusual but effective weapons!" Ridley laughed, as Kirby took out a sandal.

---

Below the X-Squad, three people were following a tunnel underneath with the stocky boy with metal claws leading, "We should be right under it now." The Mole told his comrades, before lifting up a vent and peeked out. When he saw there was currently no one around he gave them the signal it was clear. They climbed out of the hole and proceeded.

They opened a door and Tigress peeked out seeing the hall looked clear, until two fairies were sent flying. She backed right into the room and waited until the two fairies were getting eaten by Russell.

"Come on, let's hurry!" the three hurried while taking out any security cameras they saw.

"According to the blueprints supplied by that Networker dude, the mutagen should be stored in a vault close by." Le Chevre explained.

"I just hope we can carry enough in just these bags we brought." El Topo motioned to the duffel bags they were each carrying.

"Remember, we're only getting what we can carry," Tigress reminded them, "that Networker guy said he's making sure he acquires more from one of his secret stashes." the two nodded.

---

As they busted through a door and found themselves in a testing facility. They saw a door on the other side and rushed for it, only for the squad to turn around and spot them.

"So, these inadapté must be the famous X-Squad that Stockman warned the Faculty about?" Le Chevre guessed.

"Ugh!" Tigress said, in disgust. "They're even uglier and more girly up close!"

"Care to say that to our faces?!" Hothead Blitzwing asked, pulling out his blasters.

"Cause we'll show just how girly we are!" Weiss said, aiming Myretnaster.

"Remember me, y'all?" Drakus said, smirking. "What up, VILE homies!"

"Sorry, but I'm afraid we're not familiar with any dragons." Le Chevre said with a scowl.

"Get him!" Tigress ordered.

The trio attacked as Drakus dodged and weaved with his dance skills.

As they busted through a door and found themselves in a testing facility. They saw a door on the other side and rushed for it, only for the squad to turn around and spot them.

"You know, your moves do remind me of someone." El Topo admitted as he tried to slash Bebop with his claws.

"Yeah, you'd remember that after I beat you in that dance off back in the academy!" Drakus said, while he spun around El Topo and knocked him away with a backward spin kick. Then he started dodging attacks from Le Chevre.

"I don't remember El Topo ever losing a dance off to a lizard boy?" He said.

As they busted through a door and found themselves in a testing facility. They saw a door on the other side and rushed for it, only for the squad to turn around and spot them.

"Like I told Black Sheep, I wasn't rocking this chic back then." Drakus explained, and blasted Le Chevre with a surge of lightning.

Tigress leaped at Drakus to land a kick, but the Drakonian spun out of the way. Tigress landed and looked around before Drakus appeared next to her and bumped her, causing her to stumble back and sit on a crate, and a farting noise went off. Tigress gasped, then reached down and pulled up a whoopie cushion.

Drakus burst out laughing, "I still got it! Ha ha ha!"

Tasko couldn't help but laugh too, "Gets me every time!"

Tigress growled and popped the cushion with her claws, "Who are you?!"

"Don'tcha remember?" Drakus asked, "Mr. Maelstrom's favorite student? Best dancer in the academy? Number 1 in style? The quickest to steal the mops of the Cleaners? The sneakiest skinny dipper? Wore one of Mr. Maelstrom's ripped blazers and managed to pull it off well? Paper Star's best buddy?"

"Will you stop being cryptic and just tell us!" Le Chevre yelled, as he and El Topo stood up.

"Okay, maybe this will give you a hint," He did a quick spin and crossed his arms, his hair becoming snow white and jet black, as well as being messier. "Shazam!"

All the VILE agents froze in shock. As they all finally realized who he was, especially Tigress, "Oh no!" She cried in shock. "You've got to be kidding me!"

"Devon Jetstream?!" El Topo exclaimed in surprise.

"Monsieur Jetstream?!" Le Chevre added, equally surprise.

"Wait, it can't be! My old buddy Jetstream?!" Paper Star said, her eyes wide.

"That's right, buds, it's me!" Drakus laughed. "Crime School Reunion baby! Ha ha ha! At least it'd be complete if Mime Lad, Eelsy, and Cracka-Lacka were here."

Carmen noticed the shocks on the VILE Operatives faces, "Aw, don't feel too bad," she told her former classmates, humorously. "I didn't recognize him at first either."

"And guess what? I finally got a codename, or rather, I decided to use my real name! Call me... Drakus Hydrax, Prince of Drakonia!"

"Your real name's actually Drakus Hydrax?" Le Chevre responded dryly. "Really?"

"I am so confused!" El Topo stated, still dumbfounded.

Drakus smiled amusingly, until a voice shouted, "YOOOOUUUU!" Drakus looked back at Tigress. The VILE operative was grinding her teeth and panting in rage.

Drakus grinned, remembering that face, "What's the matter, Kitty? Are ya still salty about all those pranks I pulled on you?"

Tigress roared and lunged at Drakus, her claws outstretched. But the Drakonian dodged and her claws smashed a crate to splinters.

"I take that as a maybe." Drakus stated. "Well, in my defense, the reason I only pulled those pranks on you specifically was cause you treated everybody like trash. Especially sweet Lamby here!" Drakus noted.

"You three keep them busy. I'll get what we came for." Tigress instructed.

"Gladly." El Topo replied, as he, Paper Star, and Le Chevre tossed her their bags.

The trio got into defense positions, as Sabrina chuckled. "Class Pain 101 is in session. And we're your instructors."

The two VILE boys attacked Drakus first, as the Drakonian dodged their strikes, before tripping Le Chevre. El Topo tried scratching at the dream demon with his clawed gloves, while Drakus backed away, before Drakus looked at El Topo's gloves, and gasped. "Oh em goodness, Antonio, your gloves are still gorgeous! Love the new jacket. But that hair though, honey, please consider fluffing it out, that shit's still trash."

"Funny." El Topo said, internally surprised that this guy's literally complimenting his outfit.

Le Chevre jumped back to his feet and growled. "That was a lucky move. Think you can do it again?"

"Try me, Jean." Drakus answered, as he continued to fight the boys as Tigress slipped past them and went on ahead.

The TV man ran forward quickly, intending to swipe at Mallory. Yet, the only thing she did was step out of the way. Roman grabbed the TV man with his hand and cane. He pulled his head toward the fog shield around Leoric's crown, smashing their face. The TV man's face was smashed into it a second time, from Roman hitting the back of his head with the back of Melodic Cudgel.

"GET OFF ME, YOU FILTHY WORM!" The TV man yelled.

"I'm coming for that ass, boy!" Roman yelled, chasing after the TV man.

The squad looked around, only for Ridley's head to be grabbed by both of the TV man's hands. He spun him toward the fog shield, then pulled. The TV man followed-up with a punch to the chest, sending Ridley several feet away. While recovering with a roll, he felt slower. Mallory went into a stance.

"AHHHHH! WE'RE DEAD IN THE DESERT!" Tom Servo exclaimed, shooting his new shotgun frantically.

"It's a bug hunt, man, a bug hunt!" Crow whined a bit like mad, shooting his new machine gun like a loony tune.

"Hey, Starbright! Starbright! You gotta try this out! It's like that one time I went to an arcade before everyone screamed when I smashed a console, except I can destroy anything I want!"

Meanwhile, Lotte was outside of the crypt while Akko, Sucy and the X-Squad continued to fight off the fairies. A few more shots rang out as Lotte sighed.

"I can totally be a klutz in here, cause no matter where I shoot, I kill a zombie! Now Diana can't bitch to me about collateral damage!"

"Fine," said Lotte as she opened the door and got into the fight. "It can't be that much fun."

After she took one shot, what happened next, could only be considered Hell, as Lotte's eyes immediately turned red. "Oh, fuck the hell yes!" She loaded a fresh magazine into her rifle and went to fucking town, firing left and right, and when she ran dry, she dropped her gun and started using her bare hands.

"Damn. If I wasn't already dating Diana, I'd consider you dating material."

Tigress soon heard giggling close by. She stopped and looked around. When it didn't look like anyone was there she stepped closer only to hear the giggling again.

Tigress growled and facepalmed. "Who's there? Show yourself!" she suddenly heard trumpeting. She looked down seeing a small elephant sitting before her. Tigress was confused as to how an elephant got in here, until the elephant scampered into a shadow in a corner.

Suddenly coming out from the shadow was Sucy herself. Tigress backed away in surprise, but frowned at dealing with another vampire. "And who are you?"

"Name's Sucy Manbavaran." she said with a smirk.

Tigress got her claws out. "You're about to find out why I'm called Tigress!" she rushed at Sucy while trying to slash her.

The vampire easily dodged her swipes with her slippery moves, much to Tigress' irritation. Finally acting fast enough, the VILE agent landed a scratch on the vampire.

Sucy gained some distance and looked at the cut on her cheek. "Wow kitty, didn't know you were cock" she revealed her claws from her gloves. "I have claws too, let's be twore those types of claws

At the same time, the X-Squad, Reimu and Marisa continued their shootout against the fairies, the Deadly Mantis, and the TV man, who seemed to be relentless in their desire to take down the squad, the shrine maiden and the witch. And for every 10 fairies that get knocked out, 20 more seemed to appear out of nowhere to take their place.

"Hey, Rei!" Marisa called out to Reimu as she fired at the fairies with her magic wand. "There's only the two of us, the freakshow and hundreds of fairies, an oversized mantis and a TV man! We're gonna need more than what we can dish out right now!" She dodged a boulder-sized danmaku before firing a spell at the fairy that fired it. "Remember that thing we worked on?"

Reimu wished she could simply shoot her way through the swarm of fairies, like she did in the five Incidents she tackled last year. But Marisa was right, she needed much more firepower than the individual shooting can give her in order to deal with this swarm of fairies.

"Quick, how did the Deadly Mantis die?!" Lawton called out to Tom.

"Well, a plane crashed into it, the Deadly Mantis fell into the tunnel; the men fired bullets and bombs and The End." Tom explained frantically.

"Shit! We don't have any bombs with us!"

"You want bombs?! You got them!" Garie laughed, as she he took out some sort of bomb. "Hey, I need a match to light this up!"

"This better work..."

Still doubting what she is going to do, Reimu reached into her sleeve to pull a Spell Card out. Then she held the Card out in front of her face, and focused her magic energy into it.

The Spell Card didn't need much magic energy to start reacting. Within a split second, the Card began to shine brightly, enough that every fairy and Marisa stopped right in their tracks, and the squad looked up from their position on the ground.

"Fantasy Seal!"

With a loud declaration, Reimu released the magic accumulated in the Spell Card, which manifested as five large orbs of energy in different colors that then shot out in different directions as Garie threw the bomb at the fairies, the chancellor and the Deadly Mantis, freezing every fairy that gets in their way.

The fairies started to stage a retreat in panic upon seeing their brethren getting frozen stiff by the orbs of energy. But try as they might, the orbs were much faster, and could seemingly seek out targets on their own, and soon most of the fairies in the vicinity of the crypt were now frozen solid, as Russell started slurping them up.

The bloodless, non-lethal carnage ended with the orbs converging on a single fairy - the last one still standing - and then freezing her solid.

The bomb blew up, causing the Deadly Mantis and fairies to roar or scream as...they turned into frozen popsicles, as the X-Squad tied up the TV man, Le Chevre, Paper Star, Tigress, and El Topo.

"Wow." The squad said, glancing at the frozen bodies of the fairies and the Deadly Mantis.

"You think Carol was the only one with inventions?!" Garie laughed in amusement. "I can invent too."

"Well, thanks for the help." Mystle said awkwardly, rubbing the back of her head. "But we need to get to the Royal Crypts, pronto. Some Fu Manchu dude just took over."

"Fu what now?"

"A Chinese terrorist from a movie we watched." Crow said, shuddering. "The movie itself is more terrifying than the villain."

The Spell Card stopped shining once its effects were over. Meanwhile, Reimu just stood there, astonished by what she just unleashed.

"Holy... Expletive!" Marisa commented, her jaws wide open due to the sight she just saw.

Iris, however, was rather excited by the sight. "Holy moly! That is even more awesome than the holographic fireworks display MIT showed the world on January 1st, 2100 A.D.!"

"So," Neo muttered, staring at the TV man. "You're the psychopath that tried to put SMG4 and his pals on TV without their consent."

Soon, Feathers started doing sign language, as everyone looked at him in surprise.

"Well, you're not wrong, Feathers." Harley said. "But, holy hell, where the heck did you learn those words?!"

"Psychopath?" The TV man scoffed. "I'm a sociopath, thank you very much. A psychopath and a sociopath are completely different things. People really need to stop confusing them."

"Yeah, there's a difference between people like me and people like him!" Paper Star added.

"I'm not wrong, though." Neo remarked, staring the man dead in his unmoving, glaring eyes. "Alrighty, Puzzlevision, you're stuck with us now."

He paused, his changed changing to a confused one. "Puzzlevis...?" After a moment, his face changed to his "happy" face. "Oh, my, I just realized. I never actually introduced myself to you, my dear friend! No, no, Puzzlevision is not my name. Oh, and please, excuse me for being so rude."

"Not excused for anything." Krell remarked.

His face changed to being annoyed. "Party pooper." After a moment, it returned to his smile. "Ah, well! No matter!" He took off his bowler hat and bowed, well, as much as one could while tied up, before looking up to stare the X-Squad in their eyes, his face changing to a more wild, unhinged smile. "You may call me Mr. Puzzles…"

Cheri was impressed by the danmaku display made by Reimu's Spell Card. Not so much on how her friend is acting. "Do you need to act like a teenager..." She stopped herself upon realizing what she just said. "Oh wait, you are a teenager. Never mind..."

"I guess this proves that Spell Cards are gonna work, right?" Marisa asked as she brandished a Spell Card of her own that she hasn't used yet. "Man, I can't wait to test out mine!"

Reimu, however, responded by shaking her head. "I'm glad that they work as I wished. But-" The shrine maiden then gestured toward the rest of the tomb. "I think we should watch where and when we use them."

Marisa looked at what Reimu was pointing at, and instantly got the intent of the message. "Uh, yeah. Gotta work on that. Ya ain't gettin' any respect if ya cause collateral damage all the time, as the Avengers found out the hard way..."

---

"The Deadly Mantis is down." Brain Guy said sternly, as the Shadow Hunters watched what happened. "They have to go to the Royal Crypts on foot."

"At least the delay can keep them busy long enough for us to try and find some Soulstone shards, cause I ain't gonna dig through some crypts to find one, we can all agree that messing with the dead will cause serious problems." Kinga remarked with a grunt as she kept her eye on the element tracker. "Meantime, you send in something else."

"Ooh! I got an idea for one!" Magnifico exclaimed with a smile, waving. "And I got a doozy!"

"Right, doozy." Malicia remarked, rolling her eyes a bit.

---

"Focus on your incantations," The dark cultist said. "Soon, she will give in to the dark!"

There were seven cultists, once regular humans, now corrupted by worshipping dark powers. They pray around a girl in a cloak enhanced through dark magic. Tendrils of light changed from a consecrated white to a dark orange. Black streaks also trailed their way into the hands of those cultists. They had their heads down in prayer, speaking clearly in a dark tongue. As one out of the seven was about to rejoin the incantation, a heavy longsword pierced straight through them.

To the squad, it was a slight surprise this individual continued standing. Quickly, they turned around and charged with a dagger. The first swipe was dodged, with Harley rolling backward. Yet, their second strike had been slower. Arius parried the attack with his gun, then ran the dark cultist through a second time. To make sure they would die, he brought them to their knees by pushing down on their shoulder. Then, Arius took his gun out of the cultist's torso, shooting it through their neck.

The other dark individuals did not notice this as they were truly in deep focus. A purple energy coalesced around the unusually still girl. Bones either rose from the ground or appeared out of thin air, creating skeletons. Each one did not stand a chance against the squad. Although, every skeleton killed had been replaced a few seconds after.

The next few waves of skeletons were not difficult to deal with. That, alongside the dark cultists deep in prayer. Iris' sword pierced another cultist, allowing the girl they attempted to turn some consciousness. While she could not move the rest of her body very well, the girl could see a blurred silhouette of who was aiding her. Another two dark cultists fell behind the girl. Their magic was no longer strong enough to bind her. Now free, she disarmed a skeleton that was freshly formed, then cracked their skull wide open.

They killed the remaining three dark cultists. Other skeletons had also fallen, no longer forming mid-air. It was quiet, aside from crackling torches in the open area. Mallory looked at the girl, noticing that her clothing should pair with a nice hat.

"Are you a vampire?" Fish asked.

The girl said nothing, then responded. "If you help me find my hat, you'll know enough."

The location of the girl's hat was not far from their position. It was protected by a single chest, guarded by three dark cultists. They were not difficult to kill. Mallory had been correct with the past observation. The girl looked at her to speak, walking away from the dead cultists.

"You may have figured it out by now," she said, as she unfurled her cloak, revealing she was a young lady in a blood red and pink dress and mob cap, which she quickly put on. The color of her hair is cyan, but the pair of bat-like wings sprouting from her back instantly identified her as not human.

"I am Remilia Scarlet, lost daughter of Vlad Tepes the Impaler, and mistress of the Scarlet Devil mansion." The young(-looking) lady introduced herself with a foreign accent thick enough to make any listeners cringe. "For what reason have you come here, mortals?" She added, with an evil-looking grin.

Roman kept Melodic Cudgel pointed at the now-named Remilia. "The blizzard that's covering Sync City right now. You masterminded it, right?"

Remilia let out a scoff that is meant to sound intimidating. "Why, no, of course not..."

"Who did that and why?" Mystle joined in on the interrogation. "'Cause whoever did didn't wanna get sunburn?"

Remilia let out an evil laugh this time. "Indeed, witch. My kind grows weak in sunlight, so the thing doing this might have known he'd be weaker in extreme heat. Which is why I theorized that whoever summoned the blizzard did it so they can-"

"Actually, I was just joking when I brought up the 'sunlight' thing." Mystle interrupted. "Also, weak against sunlight? Does that mean you're a vampire?"

Remilia paused a bit due to the interruption. If the squad paid close attention, they would've noticed Remilia raising her eyebrows ever so slightly.

"Indeed." Remilia proudly answered. "As I was saying, whoever summoned the blizzard wanted to make it so the sun may never shine its rays on this world, and then they can lay claim to-"

"Yeah, well, slight problem with that." Marisa interrupted again. "We live in this land, and we ain't gonna just hand it over to them."

While Marisa is correct in her statement, she pointed it out in such a way that made Reimu cringe.

"Mallory Thaelana, Malthael for short," The Ashen One replied. "What brought you to this cathedral?"

"There were rumors of a hidden treasure in the crypts, and I desired to see if they're true." Remilia said. "What about you?"

Karlo did not reply immediately, then said, "We got sent here to free a Skeleton King."

"Our goals align then," Remilia replied. "If you want to reach him, we may need to go through someone first."

The squad passed by a waypoint, activating it for later use. The path eventually led them toward a necromancer.

The man introduced himself with a show of force, launching bolts of poison in five directions. Near these green misty trails, skeletons were raised. A crooked smile complimented the man's physical appearance. Despite having a shield in his left hand, there was only a small knife held in his right. Remilia spoke first, deflecting one of the five poison bolts with his spear.

"Why are you involved with Fu Manchu?" Remilia demanded. "You are making things worse for yourself."

"Even if I did tell, you may not understand," Jondar replied. "Manchu's army is my brotherhood now! They will give the world proper guidance!"

Necromantic Warrior

Jondar

Jondar's rant was promptly interrupted when he accidentally hit himself on the side of the head with his shield, causing him to jerk his face to the left.

Reimu, Tigress and Le Chevre suppressed the urge to chortle at the sight. Marisa and the squad, Paper Star and El Topo on the other hand, burst out laughing.

"Oh man, this feels like a scene from right out of Thor: Ragnarok!" Opal laughed.

Jondar quickly recovered, his expression indicating his fury about the embarrassing moment just now.

"Fine!" Remilia said, having decided to drop her thick foreign accent and melodramatic vocabulary. "If it's a fight you're looking for, Jondar, then so be it!"

"I knew her accent was way too thick to not be an act..." Roman remarked under his breath.

The squad both took a step back when they saw Jondar was starting to radiate an aura so bright that the green in its hue can be seen.

"I think he just got mad!" El Topo exclaimed.

"Perhaps you shouldn't have laughed at him..." Reimu pointed out as she summoned forth the Yin-Yang Orb in preparation for a fight.

"It ain't my fault that he nailed himself in the head while tryin' to look badass." Marisa argued. "'Sides, ya laughed at him too, didn't cha?"

The squad then turned their attention back on Remilia, who is now radiating the same red aura as her spear, glaring at Jondar, who pulled out a sword and shield, radiating a green aura.

"En Garde!"

Remilia went into a stance, ready to charge with her spear. The squad decided to let the vampire deal with Jondar. To aid their new ally, they killed the raised skeletons helping the necromancer. Again, each one had been replaced with another seconds later. While Jondar started to lose his temper, Remilia did not act so tense.

Right before Jondar could stab Remilia, his thrust was redirected. He suddenly found a spear pierced halfway through his wrist. The necromancer grunted, as Remilia twisted her weapon to align with Jondar's extended arm. A loud crack was heard, bending the human appendage in a way it should not. As Remilia pulled her weapon out, the blade was riding down Jondar's arm. Now, it appeared to almost split in two. The vampire was not finished.

Prior to Jondar falling to his knees, Remilia sliced the front of her opponent's neck. Blood had begun to gush from the wound, yet the necromancer persisted. Jondar did not move his hand to stop this bleeding. Instead, he looked up at Remilia to speak.

"I see now..." Jondar said.

Remilia did not understand this question saying, "What truth are you speaking of?"

Jondar replied, "The Yokai that did this...is the Frozen King, he seeks to return to power, and kill...the Abyss-rank Yokai...and absorb their pow...er..."

Remilia kicked the necromancer onto the ground. Then, she took out a buckler, shoving its edge into Jondar's lacerated neck. The man's body spasmed briefly, before ceasing movement. Mallory could sense more souls flowing into herself. She also noticed that whatever injuries Jondar inflicted upon Remilia were closing. The vampire stood up, moving to speak with Mallory again.

"I thank you for your assistance," Remilia said. "He certainly would have become a greater problem, had we not disposed of him now."

"Indeed," Krell replied. "Yet, where will you travel next?"

Remilia responded, flicking some blood off her buckler. "You're hunting the Soulstone Shards, are you not? Allow me to help, as you have given support. I can help with one condition, anytime there's blood, I will eat it."

"Kid, I like that. But you seem way too young to do freakier things, anyways." Drakus said.

"Oh, the nerve of you! I'm five hundred years old, for Christ's sake!" Remilia fired back.

"Christ? Who's that?" Reimu asked, confused.

"What? You've never heard of Jesus Christ? He was a holy man in the Levant thousands of years ago. They named Christianity after... oh, right." Karlo answered awkwardly. "You're probably from somewhere that's basically like old-fashioned Japan. You probably don't even understand all the pentagrams and goat horns and..."

"Jesus Christ was a holy man? Like a shrine maiden?" Reimu asked. "Did he get a lot of donations and visitors at his shrine?"

"Yes, but they killed him and hung him from a cross." Remilia scoffed, as they soon heard another noise.

"What's that?" Roman asked, as he looked around.

"Maybe it's someone snoring." Marisa remarked dryly. "I swear..."

Suddenly, someone roared, as a monster resembling a man holding a bat appeared, causing the squad to scream, with Crow screaming in a girlish voice.

"WHO ARE YOU?!" Tigress screamed in horror at the newcomer.

"Uh...Packers!" The creature exclaimed, as he waved his bat at Reimu, who yelped and dodged.

"AHH!" El Topo cried, holding onto Mr. Puzzles for dear life.

Le Chevre got up, seeing the zombie. "Sacrebleu!"

"Crap! It's the zombie from "Zombie Nightmare"! What are we gonna do?!" Crow whined a bit in horror.

Voodoo Fury That Survives Even Death

Tony Washington

"How did you know it's the zombie from that movie?" Tom yelled, as the Zombie Nightmare zombie, Tony Washington, growled, trying to hit Carmen, who rolled out of the way.

"The bat and the t-shirt saying "I survived Zombie Nightmare and all I got was this damn t-shirt" gave it away!"

"Oh."

The squad ran into the crypt, trying to escape the zombie's bat wrath, it growled madly while trying to kill them.

"Okay! How was the zombie beaten in that movie?!" Tigress called out to the bots frantically.

"Adam West shot at him." Crow explained.

"He shot him?!"

"Yeah, after shooting the voodoo lady that brought him back to life after Tony was run down by teenagers. Yeah, didn't make sense to me either."

The location beneath this labyrinthian cathedral was Leoric's resting place. Perhaps by a miracle, there was a waypoint present. Mallory activated the circle, only for it to glow dimly. They killed several skeletons, coming out of the walls to attack them. While this had not been very much of an issue, there was something of interest down the hallway.

From the ground, Leoric's ghostly skeletal form rose. He observed the squad in front of him briefly. Then, an undead energy accumulated in his palms. There were four pillars in the open area, cracks on each one. Suddenly they began to glow, while braziers on top had rekindled with spectral fire.

"You dare trespass in these royal crypts?" Leoric questioned, annoyed. "The warmth of your lives will be extinguished."

The energy in his palms flared. Four pillars and their braziers illuminated as a reaction. Then each light dimmed, with numerous skeletons forming. Many were not equipped with all of their equipment. Yet each one took a quick moment to focus, waiting for an attack.

In return, the squad sprinted forward. Taller skeletons armored in black were also seen forming even more soldiers. Remilia charged, rushing straight toward one of the Tomb Guardians. Skeletons who came into contact with her buckler were pushed back; stunned. The tomb guardian in front tried to back step away, only to be killed by a fatal stab. The vampire ripped out her spear from its right side, breaking some cheek bones. He looked at Leoric, who retreated behind a set of old doors, as the X-Squad quickly followed him.

Souls continued to be absorbed into Mallory. This was Leoric's brief shift in focus. While Leoric drifted to where his attention went, Uriel was in front of the body of a young girl, with bones covering parts of her body, which was stuck in a giant tube. It sat there floating in green ooze, with no sign of the skeleton decomposing. The black armor it wore appeared to be in functional condition, despite its red cape and chainmail horribly torn and bones covering parts of the armor. In her right hand, the girl held a large two-handed mace. Micha tensed, placing the crown on the top of the tube.

Yet, the squad would still act with extreme caution. When nothing happened, Drakus looked around himself. The area the squad and tagalongs stood on was a large open space, with more than enough room to fight. To prove Drakus correct, ghostly energy traveled toward the skeleton, and broke the tube. Pieces of the armor that had fallen off, placed themselves back in their original positions. The body exhaled.

Leoric's grip on the mace tightened, using it to help his, well, her now, new body stand. The squad took several steps back, already in a stance. Leoric was cracking her neck, walking down steps of the large throne. While smaller in height compared to Opal, she did not speak immediately. Resting the mace over her shoulder, she eventually responded.

"You appear to have made a critical error," the Skeleton King said in the voice of a young girl. "Reconnecting me with my body? I will not waste this-"

Suddenly, Leoric stopped. "Is that my voice?" Leoric then coughed, before cupping her smaller chest. "Is this my body?" She then shrugged. "Oh, well."

Mad King of Tristram

Leoric

A ghostly set of afterimages dashed forward. Drakus would have dodged, had Leoric not been in front of him so quickly. An upward vertical strike sent the Drakonian backward, tumbling to a stop on the lower level of the crypt throne room, where he saw one man.

"It's the Triad!" Drakus screamed upon coming face to face with Fu Manchu.

"More of you?" Fu Manchu frowned. "Guards!"

The World's Most Evil Mastermind

Fu Manchu

"RUN!" Mystle screamed as the squad started to run, dragging Leoric with them, as Drakus broke the throne and ran down it.

"AFTER THEM!" Fu Manchu screamed as he and his guards, along with Tony Washington, started to give chase.

The squad quickly rushed into a building...with doors in it. "Scatter!" Roman yelled out.

The squad rush through different doors as Fu Manchu and the guards rush after them. Some of the gang rush in and out of the doors. Sabrina rushed out through a car for some reason, dragging Arthi and Leoric along, and in through another door. Paige, chased by a guard, rushed out...on the ceiling...and through another door. Kanade and El Topo rushed down a hallway and bumped into the zombie Tony, knocking both down as the others peek out of the doors in confusion before they went back into the doors, with the actor and the zombie rushing off.

Eventually, the door chase ended when the squad rushed out of the building. "I don't even want to know what just happened back there." Tigress retorted.

The group yelped as Fu Manchu appeared, blocking them. The guards and the zombie Tony appeared behind the squad, trapping them in.

"This game of cat and mouse shall cease." Fu Manchu said wickedly to the group. "Now you shall tell me how the Shard of Belial works."

"What do you even want with the Lord of Lies?" Remilia asked Fu Manchu.

"With its power, I shall forge a device that shall freeze everything in this world. Then, your rulers must meet my demands...or else."

"Wait, what? Freeze everythin'?" Harkness asked Fu Manchu in disbelief. "If you froze everythin', wouldn't it make it hard to do, 'cause they won't be moving at all?"

"Honestly, what kind of plan is that anyway?" Tony the Clock asked Fu Manchu with a scoff. "Now, unless you mean putting this city in a proverbial Ice Age, then yes, that would make sense...but actually freezing everything?"

"Look, does it matter?! I am Fu Manchu! Your existence means nothing to me!" Fu Manchu exclaimed in frustration at the squad. "Now..."

Fu Manchu yelped as some gunshots almost hit him. He glared as the white-haired girl clad in gold and white was shooting at him, snapping, "Get your hands away from my sister, Fu Manchu!"

"I have no idea who you are, but you made a terrible mistake."

"I am the archangel of Justice, I am...Tyrael!" Tyrael said.

"You made a mistake in that getup!" Drakus remarked. "Did your mom dress you, Fool Man-dumbass?"

"Yeah. And while we're at it, why don't you go back to Middle Earth and try to get a ring, Saruman?" Tom Servo joked a bit, making Crow laugh like mad.

"Yeah, he does look like him a bit." Crow remarked with a frown, making Sar...err, I mean Fu Manchu, cringe at this.

"May the Force be with us; Wow, looks like the James Bond villain has missed his nipple."

"Blah blah blah. Drac is dumb, blah."

"All right, that's enough!" Fu Manchu exclaimed, having enough of the squad's smugness. "Now you all shall suffer the wrath of my pet!"

Suddenly, stomping noises were heard as the guards yelped, running for the hills. The gang saw a 30 foot Gila Monster appearing, roaring viciously. Mystle gasped, "It's a giant Gila Monster!"

Enormous Hell-Bred Beast

Giant Gila Monster

"Yeah, the same one that replaces Godzilla vs. Megalon in the DVD cases!" Crow exclaimed in surprise at the sight of the monster.

"Tell me you know how to stop this beast!" Tyrael exclaimed as she kicked the Giant Gila Monster in the face.

"He was destroyed in an explosion!" Crow exclaimed as he dodged the Giant Gila Monster's attack. The monster roared angrily. "Wow, Gila is angry today."

"And we're not?" Paige asked with a scoff.

"Back off, a-wipe!" Marisa exclaimed as the squad held their weapons at Fu Manchu. "Put your hands in the air!"

"And don't even think of waving them like you don't care!" Mystle exclaimed with a laugh.

"Fools! You are no match for Fu Manchu!" Fu Manchu hissed furiously at his enemies. "You are nothing more than..."

Just then, in front of the squad appeared a familiar redhead girl, one Akko knew well. Among some of the squad, confidence became replaced by awe, while Fu Manchu's forces were shaking in fear.

Amanda had fully stood up in the light, revealing a crazed grin.

"By God! You fucking beast of a heathen group! Surrounded by a Gila Monster, the undead, and the Triad! And what do you do? You shrug it off, bust out the weapons, eat some fae, and yell 'Come at me, you shits!' No wonder Diana keeps getting bedded by your badass nobility, Akko! I'm thinking about violating some verses myself!"

Fish kept her gaze and tone steady. "Amanda O'Neill. To what do we owe this unexpected pleasure?"

"Oh, you know...just out and about with my posse!"

"Posse?" Penguin looked up to see an unusual sight.

"So look! You know how you got her own pet vampires? Well, that got me thinking, so I acquired some partners for myself! Two of them! Which is just as good!"

The squad saw two warriors who looked different from the rest, even looking to be around Amanda's age (which is 16). One was in a standard Catholic nun's uniform, which consists of a black habit, a nun's hooded cowl, a white scarf, white gloves, white stockings held with a garter belt, and black boots, with black hair billowing out. The other had neck-length, straw-colored hair, and grey-green eyes. She dressed in the priest uniform of the Iscariot Organization and wore glasses.

"Heinkel! Yumi! Say hi!"

"Konichiwa." Yumi replied.

"Guten tag."

"One's Japanese, and the other's German!"

"...That's it?" Kanade asked.

"What do you mean that's it?" asked Amanda, confused.

"You're not going to...make a joke about that or anything?" Drakus asked. "I mean, Lila's here, and if you add Yumi and Heinkel, we essentially have an Axis of Righteousness."

"Hey!" shouted Amanda, clearly offended. "I may be an American Catholic, but that doesn't mean I'm racist!"

"Hai."

"Yumi is right. Amanda is actually very nice once you get to know her," Heinkel added.

"Guys!" Amanda whined, blushing deeply. "You're ruining my scary reputation!"

"Uh, excuse me? You do realize we outnumber you, correct?" Tyrael asked Fu Manchu, pointing out something.

Fu Manchu blinked as he now noticed that only he and Tony Washington, who just got slapped silly by Mr. Puzzles, as Tony Washington shrugged it off, and the Gila Monster, who Mystle was luring through a portal, are outnumbered. Correction: now only he, his army, and Tony were left.

"Oh dear. I didn't think this through." Fu Manchu said, sweat dropping a bit, as Akko and Snoozy looked at him with bloodlust in their eyes.

"Come on, Fu! The fun is only beginning! I'm actually enjoying myself for once, especially with your attempt at world domination!" She began to move closer toward Fu Manchu while the man in question began to fire a gun towards Akko. "You put up a better fight than that mantis ever did! So come on!"

With every statement, her and Snoozy stepped closer and closer.

"Hit me! Fight me!"

The two now stood over him, dwarfing him in darkness, power, and fear.

"Go Yay."

"...yay?"

"That's the spirit!"

Amanda stiffened at this. "Now if you'll excuse me, it's time for the Iscariots to do your job for ya, and put these soulless bodies where they belong!" said Amanda, whipping out a new set of blades. "In the ground in case you didn't take-"

A few of Fu Manchu's guards ran at her, shouting, before they were cut down with ease.

"In case you didn't take my meaning."

"Who are we?!" shouted Amanda.

"The most unnecessary of all necessary evils!" the squad responded in sync, rushing towards them, as the VILE operatives and Carmen looked confused.

"Why are we necessary?!" Drakus yelled.

"To purge the world of evil worse than even the darkest of man's heart!" All of them took out their weapons, ready to fight.

"And why are we God and/or the devil's chosen few, ordained to undertake this unholy task?!" Amanda decreed.

"Because no one else legally will!"

Amanda crossed two bayonet blades together, one from the side and one from the top, striking her signature pose and grinning.

"And because it's fucking FUN!" Akko added.

Amanda, Drakus, and Akko laughed as the squad got to work, dismembering the first few guards in their path.

"AMEN!"

"Not the face!" Fu Manchu yelled, unloading his gun as Akko and Snoozy rushed at him.

---

"Yeah, Yeah! That's the stuff! I like a good fight! If the meal's too easy to eat, then there's no challenge!"

Diana made sure to leave the speaker on as Blackheart and the old men in the room listened to the sounds of flesh being ripped apart. Various expressions filled their faces, but there was one undeniable common factor: Fear. Except for Blackheart, who looked confused.

"Tonight's show: Shiny Akko and her amazing assistant, the Great Snoozy, perform a magic trick by making this foppish old bastard disappear into nothing!"

"WE'RE HERE ON EPIC MEAL TIME! MY ELEPHANT HOMIE'S THE SAUCE BOSS, AND TONIGHT, WE'RE EATING THIS OLD AS FUCK MAN WITH DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR!" Drakus yelled.

"Who...is... that... exactly?" asked Sir Ronald Penwood, also known as the Proprietor, knowing what was coming.

"Oh, that's Akko," said Diana, smiling sweetly. "This is what happens when anything remotely bad happens to us, or if she has to... entertain herself."

"That's Snoozy, this usually happens whenever Drakus lets him have a new soul for the janitors in Tartarus." Blackheart said, as his eyes turned calmer. "So, what was the issue about Diana's funding?"

"Issue?"

"What issue?"

"I don't see an issue."

"Shut up and take our money!"

---

Soon after Snoozy and Akko finished eating Fu Manchu and after the squad ripped and teared through Fu Manchu's forces, the souls of him and Tony Washington were being absorbed into Mallory as great flames.

"Was that necessary?" Reimu asked Akko, annoyed by the blood getting everywhere.

"Hey, no one gives a damn about him anyway." Akko said, grabbing Belial's shard, as a young girl clad in a green and black trenchcoat, dark green pants, a lime green shirt and black shoes appeared.

"Now then, let's get going, I think Diablo and Belial are picking something up." Katana said.

"They're after Andariel since that was easier than finding myself, it's not that hard to locate, actually it's in Italy, more specifically, the Kingdom of Rosas, and though that scary dog and that weird guy with that cloak of hands may be a mystery, Rosas is deep in the land of the Lotus-Eaters, and you mustn't get within a mile of the nectar they're offering..." Belial paused.

"Scary dog? Weird man with the cloak of han-" Gypsy yelped.

"Oh God..." Crow groaned.

"Not..." Tom yelped in fear.

Tom and Crow cried as Tom sniffled, "We're never going to make it! This is a bug hunt, man, a bug hunt!"

"Game over, man, game over!" Crow cried.

"What's wrong?" Neo asked.

"We'll find out soon, and I take it these are more than ordinary Nymphea," Carmen stated.

"Have you lost your touch?" Sucy asked. "The lotus there could be Nelumbo."

"Were we heading to southern Asia, perhaps," Doom replied. "However, the two genera, despite being colloquially called 'lotus,' are unrelated, and still distant yet from the genus 'lotus.' Of the three, the one most native to Italy–"

"Can we get back on topic?" Drakus snapped. "There was a topic, and you just got way off it. Yeesh, nerds these days, I swear. Anyway, the thing about these lotuses is that if you come into contact with them and they get in your system, you lose all desire to go anywhere but the lotus island. To you, lotus-land is now paradise. Which, I mean, hey, you won't be conscious of the fact that you're missing out on anything, but the rest of us are gonna be teed."

"So, basically we have to avoid eating drug flowers and fight a hand guy to get Andariel, seems simple enough," Cell mused.

"Yeah, you'd think," Drakus sighed. "But I know you already guessed there's a catch."

"Indeed." Taeko nodded. "So, what's the catch?"

Fish leaned over to whisper to Kanade, "Jealous that their synergy doesn't involve mansplaining?"

Penguin reeled her back in with a hand gently wrapped around; "Oh, don't worry, Fish. That's just how he shows affection to others."

"Sides, all Victor has done is add a piece to the screwed up puzzle," Kanade stated.

"The lotus-eaters have built an entire cult around trying to get as many people to inhale the lotus fumes as possible," Drakus stated. "Newbies show up and the lotus-eaters will stop at nothing, and I do mean NOTHING, to trick us into their ranks so they have more. Now we're getting to the worst part: the tactic they've picked up. Lemme tell ya, it makes me, a known sociopath and lunatic with a history of violence, fired up with fear. What they've worked out is a strategy so evil it makes my blood BOIL!"

"And what method of indoctrination could make the new leader of the Decepticons tremble?" Icy Blitzwing asked.

Drakus let out a long, low sigh. "Perfume salesmen."

Diablo flinched. "Our sister's so fucked..."

At that moment, yet another explosion erupted from the basement. This one is followed by something, or rather, someone flying out of the hole made in the wall.

"Good day to you, Flandre..." Remilia, with a deadpan tone, greeted the person who came out of the hole. "What would you like to do today?"

"I want to play~!" The person, Flandre, said cheerfully and maniacally. "And I want you to play with me, sis~!"

"Very well..." Remilia said as she opened the grimoire she brought along. "Be a good girl, and I will play with you as long as I- er, you can..."

---

Across a hidden island chain Prehistoric Park holds a wide array of extinct wildlife ranging from the seeds of the giant Carboniferous tree Lepidodendron to dinosaurs. However, the X-Squad today is on Isla Sorna visiting some more modern day residents.

The varying climates of the climate change had allowed a small section of Isla Sorna to be as warm and slightly arid making it almost like the savannahs of southern Africa. It created the perfect exhibit for a herd of African Bush Elephants. Maya, Russell, who Blackheart gave the power of daywalking, and Harley sat on the roof of a green jeep with the Prehistoric Playpen logo of a skeletal Tyrannosaurus of the side holding a branch. The herd's matriarch was elegantly using her trunk to snap leaves off of the branch in his hand. It could easily be mistaken for a modern day wildlife preserve except for the herd of the Quagga grazing silently and the snuffle of one of the exhibits Southern Black Rhino.

"Belle here is the Park's matriarch," Maya said, patting the trunk of the elephant. "The African Bush Elephant is the largest land mammal outside the park. Our Megatherium is slightly larger. Rob and Karlo are currently looking over the exhibit that will house possibly the largest land mammal to ever exist."

Maya climbed into the jeep and drove to the exit. The new exhibit was nearby, although, it was massive to house an equally giant animal. Only two other exhibits could have challenged it in size: the Paralititan exhibit and the Jurassic Heights, (the exhibit housing the Late Jurassic Herbivores). Maya parked at a set of stairs that led up to a viewing platform. Drakus was already up there looking amazed at some papers.

"Well, this is amazing, the thing dwarfed even Tyrannosaurus!" He turned to the camera. "This time, we're going back 23 million years to the Chinese/Mongolian border, to rescue the largest land mammal: Paraceratherium transouralicum."

Blackheart then showed the file. It had a reconstruction of what seemed to be a mix of a rhino and a giraffe. It was tall and had a long neck like a giraffe but was stockier and had a head similar to a rhino except without a horn. Its neck was also pointed at a 45 degree angle; possibly to make the moving of the neck itself easier.

"This is the big boy we're after," Blackheart grinned, holding his file. "It went by many names, such as Indricotherium, because the fragmentary nature of the fossils and politics meant that it took a while before they could be compared and the name Paraceratherium could be chosen. Be glad that InGen and the OVDF funds this place so we can get fast growing plants quickly, otherwise we'd have to create a 1000km2 enclosure just to feed them!"

"I've been reading that they shared a common ancestor with tapirs and rhinos," Maya replied. "They may share some of the behaviour so that might include females travelling in family herds so we might be able to rescue a few. I just don't get why they went extinct, they lived in loads of habitats all the way from the Balkans to Mongolia and Pakistan."

The Paraceratherium was truly a king among mammals. A never ending continent allowed the Paraceratherium to conquer all of Eurasia. The kings only started to die out 23 million years ago through multiple means. Climate change, the evolution of gompotheres, who changed the habitat, and the arrival of new predators like cats and dogs killed off the young more quickly. Soon, the only giant since the dinosaurs lost their throne.

"These guys must have had a massive gestation period," Maya exclaimed. "An elephant has one of two years and they're tiny compared to these guys!"

Drakus smiled as they descended the stairs to head to the portal. However when they got to Nublar, something was a bit off. Hammond radioed them and told them to come to the helipad. When they arrived a blue helicopter touched down with the InGen logo printed on the side. A group of men and women in suits stepped out, and Hammond's lawyer Gennaro rushed up to him to whisper something in his ear. A man in his forties in a pin striped suit, balding brown hair and circular glasses shook Hammond's hand.

"Everyone this is my nephew and one of the board members of InGen, Peter Ludlow," Hammond explained.

"So you must be the famous Blayke Hartford. Before you worked here, I saw your documentaries," he said, happy to see him.

"Thanks, Ludlow. How come you're here?"

"To put it bluntly, InGen has sold out on its stock, as when you finally cure a disease, you can't sell medicine for that disease. InGen is running out of money. My fellow board members and I want a tour of the park to see if it is suitable to open for the public or if these Masarani board members wish to buy the park. We wish this fellow here to give us a tour while you continue your adventures over the next few days."

He pointed at Rob, who was flabbergasted. "I'm not a tour guide; I'm the Head Park Keeper!"

"Rob, you know your stuff, and Regis is useless," Gennaro explained. "Anyway, Mary is fully qualified to cover for you."

As the tour that will determine the future of the park begins, so must the squad's next adventure. One of the last places the Paraceratherium lived was 23 million years ago in the modern day Mongolia/China border, and that is where they must go.

They emerged from the portal in a vast arid scrub similar to the edges of today's Gobi Desert. Nearby was a small forest but there was no green on the trees; only the white skeletal fragments of the dying trunks. Climate change had ravaged this land. To the back of them was a small rocky outcrop which blocked the view of the south. Nigel stood on the jeep and held a pair of binoculars to his eyes and surveyed the land. Barely visible behind the sand and heat waves of the scrub was a blue mountain range.

"I think I can see something at the base of the mountains. It may be a lake," Maya said, dropping from the jeep's bonnet. "It's getting late though I think we should make camp."

The sun had made an amber and purple glow sweep across the land. The great yellow orb was faintly drifting behind the mountains in the far distance.

Although cats and dogs have yet to evolve, there are still other carnivores that stalk the Mongolia scrubs.

Suddenly they heard a deep bellow from behind the rocky outcrop. Drakus tossed caution to the wind and started to run to the origin of the sound. Maya however climbed in the jeep to follow. Behind the outcrop was another part of the dying forest but there clearly was a dried riverbank with the earth being cracked from where the water had evaporated. The source of the bellow came from the dried riverbank. A giant black hairless mammal with the same body design as a giraffe but far more stockier and with a hornless rhinos head had collapsed in the dried riverbank.

"My goodness, it's a Paraceratherium!" Maya exclaimed. "A sub-adult male. He's not fully grown but still he's at least three metres tall at the shoulder. The poor thing, he's too skinny. Dehydration has definitely gotten to him."

They tried to get closer but one large slam of a front leg deterred them. Maya knelt down and looked at the dried riverbank.

"This riverbank only recently dried up. He probably came thinking there was still water and stayed, hoping water would come. If they're like rhinos, males of this age won't travel in the herd. Wait, help me get this…"

She pulled a shovel from the jeep, as Mystle pulled off the water tank. The squad dug a quick hole near the Paraceratherium, but out of stomping reach, and poured the water into the small hole. The thirsty giant managed to edge his way up to the hole where he started to greedily drink.

"I'll call you after one of your synonyms namesake: Indrik," Drakus smiled, patting the Paraceratherium on the head. "He's too weak to go through the portal. Wait here, and if he runs out pour the other tank in."

The park vet, Mackenzie, has treated everything from mammoths to Tyrannosaurs. Although, treating a dehydrated Paraceratherium may still be a challenge.

Mackenzie came through the portal after Drakus, and gasped at the size of the Paraceratherium. When crew members came through, carrying packages and water tanks, they too gasped at the size of the behemoth. Mackenzie gave a tank to Maya for the jeep, as Drakus helped her pour some brown powder into the water that Indrik was drinking.

"With him being dehydrated, he'll need more than just water to keep him up. He would have urinated out essential ions and minerals that his body needs, which often is a bigger killer than water deficiency. This'll restore his levels," she explained.

As night approaches, a new threat emerges. Many predators come out at night, and a downed Paraceratherium would be an easy kill.

The crew all became nervous as growls could be heard when night fell. Indrik started bellowing in fear but in his state he couldn't defend himself. Maya lit a torch and green eyes of the carnivores darted back. They had a dog-like body with a long cat-like tail and paws and a long face with jaws filled with hyena-like teeth. In the night their coats were a pink colour with black stripes.

"Hyaenodon," Maya panted. "I can't tell which species. They lived across Asia, Europa, Africa and North America but went extinct when cats and dogs evolved. They can hear the distress calls of Indrik."

Hyaenodon had powerful jaws that could crush bone with ease. Fossil skulls have often been found with Hyaenodon teeth marks in them. If one managed to bite Indrik, tonight would be his last.

"Stay away from me, you mutts!" Mr. Puzzles yelled. He had a klaxon in one hand and would make it burst out a horrid noise when the predators got too close. They snarled and snapped before continuing to pace around to look for an opening, accidentally walking into the portal, which Tomie opened, one after the other.

The next morning, they sat with cold cups of coffee and weary eyes. "We managed to get them into the park," Mystle smiled. "And we might get Indrik to the Park after all."

The young Paraceratherium was slowly trying to stand, but in his weak state, he found it too much of a struggle. Mackenzie then had an idea. Maya would try and rescue some females while she stayed with Indrik. Soon, the squad set off to search for a family for Indrik.

Back in the Park, Rob is continuing his grand tour of the park for Peter Ludlow and the executives. However he has decided to show them the park's largest carnivorous dinosaur.

The executives followed Rob to a viewing platform overlooking a swamp. A giant lake sat in the middle which trickled into the nearby sea and large mangrove trees dotted around the watery edges of the exhibit. One of the enclosure's residents was fast asleep but the other was very much awake.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Spinosaurus Aegypticus!"

A giant blue dinosaur with a long snout and a pink sail stood in the lake with the end of his snout in the cool water. His eyes were intently focused on the water. Suddenly looking closely you could see them dart quickly.

"Spinosaurus has receptors at the end of his snout," Bob whispered. "His nostrils are also high up his snout. It lets him sense a fish coming and then attack it at the right moment without leaving the waterside for hours."

Suddenly, the Spinosaurus swept its massive hand and caught a giant fish in its mighty jaws. It shook its head swiftly and the fish stopped moving. When this happened, it let the fish drop into the water where it bellowed in triumph.

"Do you think it will scare the kids?" someone asked.

"I think that will scare the parents," another replied.

Back in the Oligocene, the squad hunting the Paraceratherium herd have stumbled across a forest that could hold some clues.

The sun was still low in the sky. Nigel was knelt by some trees which were smashed and the ground was a distinctly darker brown compared to the rest of the dirt in the forest. Chiyo turned to the camera: "With the Paraceratherium's massive size it would have boiled if it was in this desert sun so they most likely rested at midday then moved at cooler times of the day to aid thermoregulation."

"Just missed them," Maya said, standing up. "If we take the jeep we might catch… Get down!"

A very strange animal had just arrived at the forest. It resembled a boar but stood more upright, had incisors pointing down instead of the curled tusks and had a large hump on its back. Although the first thing to catch your eye would be the giant size, almost the same height as a human.

"An entelodon," Maya whispered. "I'm just glad we're downwind these guys have a great sense of smell. They will eat anything and that includes meat; those incisors are just designed to strip flesh from bone. Their big size means that they wouldn't need to kill but rather steal kills from other predators."

"Are they related to pigs?" Aria asked, whimpering at the size of the creature.

"Yeah although whether they are pigs is in question and for today I'm not eager to find out."

The entelodon started digging for what seemed to be a root. However it lifted its head up and started sniffing the air. It squealed as four much larger entelodonts started to approach. They had a thin brown coat with a yellow V shape on their face.

"Paraentelodon macrognathus," Maya whispered. "Look, they're challenging the smaller entelodon!"

The smaller entelodont ran off into a portal Mystle opened, as the larger group started sniffing at where it had been digging. However they quickly picked up another scent… One stared at the two and grunted before walking towards them. Soon it became a run. The two sprinted as the group of pigs from hell chased after them. The forest started to get thicker and Maya quickly concocted a plan.

"Climb a tree quick!"

The pigs' large size meant that all they could do was trot around the base of the tree snarling and snapping. They zig-zagged around trying to find a way to catch their human meal but soon decided that some buried roots were an easier meal. When it was safe they climbed down but could still hear some rustling. Nearby they found a herd of very strange mammals. They walked like gorillas but were almost three metres high, walked on their knuckles which were clawed and had a face which was a mixture between a panda and a horse. They were brown with golden stripes. When they ate they sat down and used their claws to pull branches down.

"I thought these guys would evolve in years to come! Chalicotherium!" Maya cried in joy. "Hey, you wouldn't believe that these guys are closely related to horses."

"I literally can't believe it," Ridley muttered, watching one strip some green shoots from a nearby tree. Another sat drinking from a small lake, too small though to quench the thirst of a Paraceratherium though.

"It's amazing they walk on their knuckles so they don't damage their claws. I would save some but they've only just evolved so taking them from their habitat could have dire consequences."

"Eh, what the fuck? Let's get some!" Drakus said, luring some Chalicotheriums through the portal with some shoots, right through the portal.

Suddenly, something burst from the bush and tried to tackle a drinking Chalicotherium. It was a Hyaenodon but much larger and was a lighter colour than the ones which tried to eat Indrik.

"The largest species. We better…" Nigel was interrupted. The Paraentelodons had returned and fancied the Hyaenodon's meal. They fanned out and surrounded the Hyaenodon. Although it was the same size as them and much faster, the odds were against it and the predator ran off into the portal, which Snatcher opened.

Paraentelodons are good thinkers, so accompanied with their meanness, the Hyaenodon had taken the correct option. However, the hell pigs have seen a few tasty horderves…

The lead enetelodont roared at them and charged. The arrival of new predators and extinction of old prey meant that the Paraentelodon would go extinct soon as well. They opened the portal and ran through…

"Here is our resident Dromeosaurus pack. You're lucky they're normally resting now and our behaviourist Owen is asserting his dominance…"

Owen held out his hand and the pack of small feathered dinosaurs snarled at him. The lead male got close and Owen touched his nose which made the dinosaur recoil; Owen had made sure he was alpha-male.

"The squad brought something back," Rob said, suddenly. "I'll take you to the portal, and the holding pens."

"Get them into Pen 5!" Mary yelled as they arrived. The squad were looking down as the door to Pen 5 was opened and four giant boars entered snarling.

"What are they?" Ludlow asked in astonishment.

"Paraentelodons," Maya explained. "Giant relative to pigs. Intelligent, resourceful and with a good sense of smell they are perfect Park residents. Mostly carnivores but they will often eat roots."

"I'll be sure these guys are fed good an' proper before we house them," Mary said. "Now go get me one of those mega beasts I've been hearin' about."

The squad will have to rescue a herd fast. With the drought getting worse, the giants may not be able to last long without water.

The portal emerged right next to the jeep. They climbed in noticing that the sun was high in the sky. With the Paraceratherium now resting it might be easier to rescue some. A thin line of sand was thrown up by the wheels of the jeep as it spurted across the desert. Maya had to take regular drinks to keep hydrated and forced Drakus to drink some as well to stop him from passing out. However they soon saw a sad sight. A dead young Paraceratherium was laying in the desert, with a pack of Hyaenodon devouring it. From their colouring, it was the same species that tried to eat Indrik.

"I think that the poor Paraceratherium died of dehydration, instead of the Hyaenodon jaws, but they can eat anything. They had powerful stomach acid so could easily digest that dried flesh and bone. Sadly they're going extinct. New carnivores, like dogs, are outcompeting them, and with climate change making their prey vanish, they will too." Maya said. "It's weird to think that there are other large fully carnivorous land mammals other than cats and dogs," she remarked. "Bears are omnivorous and we forget that hyenas aren't cats or dogs. Stoats, weasels, civets and otters are small, so we forget them easily."

The Hyaenodon, distracted by the meal, didn't notice Maya creeping behind them. When she was in position, Mystle blared the jeep horn which startled the Hyaenodon by the new, strange noise. They ran straight into the path of Maya who opened the portal and sent them through. Now all that was left was the Paraceratherium.

With such large animals looking for water, it does not take long to find the giant mammals.

The sun had started to dip as they reached a dry riverbed but they were more distracted by the giants before them. A group of four females and one male looking for a potential mate alongside water were at the scene. The largest stood up to five metres at their highest; wafting their slightly large ears to keep cool. Also noticeable were their giant humps on their back. The two largest females went up to each other and even smashed their necks together creating a very loud crack; a possible sign of affection. A bear-dog the size of a human started to edge near but the stamp of the male's foot deterred him and he ran off into the portal when Ridley opened it. An old female started to dig with her feet for the water that wasn't there but it did give Maya an idea. She took the shovel again along with the water tank and filled the hole that they made with cool water.

"Come on you thirsty guys," Maya cried. "Come for the water and the 21st century."

Krell stood ready with the portal and as they got close she opened it sending them through. They quickly jumped in the jeep and drove at full speed to where Mackenzie was with Indrik, although it was nearly dark when they arrived. Indrik had regained some of his old strength, and was now standing up with Mackenzie holding him a branch to eat, using his prehensile lip to strip leaves off the branch.

"It seems Indrik here wants to go to his new home," Mackenzie laughed.

Ridley opened the portal and, using the branch as a way to attract him, they took him to his new home.

Quickly, Indrik and the others are sent to a new home on Sorna, but the fate of the park is still at stake.

They all sat in the hide watching the Paraceratherium browse in their new habitat. Chiyo was pulling with the old female, named Old Betty, on a branch. The board members and a sulky Peter Ludlow were there with them.

"With a few adjustments, we believe that Prehistoric Park can be opened to the public," a middle aged female board member explained. "We told Mr Ludlow that we would not go ahead with his plan as it would lose the purpose of the place, besides that, we know the nanobots plan and having them speech would work painlessly, so there's that, but at the same time, the dinosaurs and prehistoric critters unanimously voted to not do Ludlow's plan, as they agree it'll inevitably lead to many of them killing people thanks to the high stress it'll cause."

Peter Ludlow had wanted to turn the park into a mass resort holding 20,000 people with giant rollercoasters, tennis courts, a dinosaur petting zoo, Owen making the raptors do tricks and moving one of the Tylosaurs into a land tank to jump on cue to eat a shark. Hammond quickly shot him down in flames and put a cap of 150 people, making it affordable for all to come, with no tricks and rides alongside no human contact with the animals. Basically how the Park currently is, just with public knowledge of the extinct animals.

"The Masarani board members were also impressed and are willing to buy the park and keep it closed to the public but we need to see what happens from now until then."

When they left, Hammond sat silently, watching the Paraceratherium. He handed Maya a file.

"Regardless of what happens, it's business as usual," he sighed, happily watching Indrik drink from the lake "Some palaeontologists have approached me about rescuing a feathered dinosaur that hunted microraptor…"