Author's note: Rabbid Guy (FFN) is being exported here by the author, me, to give readers a more comfortable option on a site built for fanfiction, as opposed to W-ttp-d, its original home. I'm new to publishing on FFN but I've always found it to have a higher quality and variety of works compared to W-ttp-d. Rabbid Guy will still remain on W-ttp-d and updates to it will be prioritized there still. I aim to keep both versions as close to the same as possible, and updating roughly the same times too. Thank you for reading! May the White Rabbid guide you home.

- Silverwings 7/11/24

Today was his first day at his new position: Finance manager for Big Hope Cancer Research. He stepped foot in his new office for the first time with his desk supplies piled up in his arms. He let the items drop on his desk before going back to turn on the lights. A whole room to himself with a window too. From here he could see the research lab connected to the offices. He wasn't much of a lab guy, but the lab did need a numbers guy to organize funds.

He was going to be very comfortable being paid nearly double than what he had before. As long as he kept this up, he would live a smart and proper life absent of chaos.

He sorted through his pens and supplies quickly so that he could get started on the important part.

Of the supplies was a small toy.

A little artistic model of a combat robot named Bulwark, his very own robot design.

It was a sort of flat remote control square with four wheels, a front plow, and a spinning disk weapon made to cut through other people's robots. It had been nearly four years since he had anything to do with building combat robots, but there was a reason. He dropped the toy into his desk drawer and closed it.

Robot combat was fun, but it was time he made a living.

He logged into his computer to face the overflow of financial issues. This was the beginning, fulfilling his destiny. Nine hours a day, five days a week, from 6am till 3pm did he part.

Or at least, that was what was initially expected.
He looked at the clock. It was just now 2pm. He sighed. One more hour and he would be home.
A knock on his door. Without even asking permission a man peeked in.

"...Need anything sir?" Guy asked, sitting up straight. He recognized the intruder as Roman Walsh, the general manager slightly above his position.
"Well yes actually. It's been a while since we've had somebody with your job, and you've probably already noticed that there's a lot to get done," Walsh said.

"That there is," Guy said. There was barely a thought behind the statement. The conversation was already more exhausting than counting sheep or being dead.
"Good, well we were wondering if you wouldn't mind staying a few extra hours to help get our financial reports back up to date?" Walsh said.

"Uh, how many hours are you asking?" Guy asked.
"Well uh just up until seven o'clock," Walsh avoided eye contact.

Guy was stung by the idea of working three more hours after being so close to finishing for the day, but who would he be if he said no? There was so much left to be done. Somebody had to do it, and hey, being flexible was something companies liked in an employee. It was his first day at a new position. Surely he was reliable enough to pull his weight.

"Sure," Guy shrugged.
"Really?" Walsh asked.
"Yeah, I'll do it," Guy glanced back at his computer.

"Oh thank you, thank you! I really appreciate this Guy! You don't know how much we need this! Ok ok, I'll leave you to it! Thank you again, really," Walsh cheered before slipping out.

Appreciated!
It hurt to know he was going to be here for four more hours, but he was making a difference. Maybe it was worth the sacrifice to be seen as reliable in his new position.

Little did he know this was far from a one off occurrence.

The next day, Walsh popped in again to ask the very same thing. Guy's heart sank heavy, but he understood how much work still had to be done. His time wouldn't be for nothing.

"I'll stay," Guy said. Walsh smiled.

"I'm really diggin your work ethic Guy! You mean a lot to us for this, you really do!" Walsh said before slipping away again.
What was Guy even thinking? Staying until seven the night before was torturous. He could barely keep his eyes open. Now, it was too late to say no. Walsh was already gone and beaming. He sighed and went back to work.

The next day he had his heart set on saying no, but fate had other plans.

New donations flooded the system early in the day and needed to be sorted, set up for spending, sent back thank yous, and made plans for how they could get more money next year.
It was too much to ignore.
Say no in an emergency like this? There wasn't a worse time, but it never got better.

After that, an endless cycle of new emergencies was starting to become the norm and expected to be stayed late for. Just when he was almost done with his current work, something else would need to be dealt with. He found tasks he was worried about early on becoming untouchable, as so many things were becoming more important before he could ever reach it.

How did anyone do this job without a second person, or any kind of help?
By Thursday, he was falling asleep at his desk.

By Friday, he woke to find himself standing alone in the middle of the office space without any memory of leaving his room. He hadn't just fallen asleep this time. He had gotten up and sleepwalked.

Rabbids.

When Guy was a kid, there were no rabbids, and then, without explanation, they were everywhere.

Perhaps they came from a deep underground cave system, or they used to be sea creatures before evolving feet. Maybe they were man made experimental rodents too powerful to control, or even space aliens sent to make way for Earth's assimilation.

Whatever rabbids really were used to be the event of the century that everyone wanted to record for the history books, but the fascination faded into frustration. There were no easy answers with rabbids, maybe even no answers whatsoever. Guy and everyone else knew that there was only one important thing to know about rabbids: don't.

Don't look, don't feed, don't pet, don't play, don't do anything interesting, and for the love of God don't challenge them or you're bound to attract their chaos and destruction.
Guy had seen the news report: a rabbids activity spike in his city that morning.

He knew it could be used as a reasonable excuse not to leave the house, but if he didn't go to the office, he was sure to have tripled his workload the day after. This might be getting out of hand.. well, maybe just a tad. It's not like he had much going on when he was at home anyway. The only things he ever did, he did at work. It was good for him. His time at home would never bring him to the top of the company. His sacrifice would surely come to paint him as one of the most loyal and hardworking people to ever enter the office.

So, with that shaky reasoning, he was off to clock in as planned.
The reports were right.
As he was driving through the neighborhood and into the city, the little freaks were up to their nonsense. He could've sworn he saw them burning a car filled with watermelons on the side of the road. It was always something crazy like that with them. Still, the rabbids were the least of his worries. He had to keep on driving past them, hoping he was fast enough to make it to work on time.

He arrived through the glass double doors and passed the lobby up to the second floor office. He walked passed his coworkers in their cubicles to his secluded office at the end of the space.
He put down his bag, took off his jacket, and sat down. Finally, work might start to look done. He put his hands on his keyboard and logged in. While waiting for the software to start, he felt his eyes involuntarily close and his head fall. He caught himself before his face slammed into the keyboard.

He had been wide awake driving here, but now that he'd sat down, the urge to rest had possessed him. This was too unfair. He had so much work left to do, but he could hardly see the screen from how much his eyes were crossing.

He wished he were home. At home, all he ever did was sleep off his shifts. He had already slept so much, but he still wasn't rested. There was so much to do, he couldn't go home because he was tired, right? Everybody was tired, it was the thing about work. He shook his head to regain some energy. Coffee, coffee will do.

He got up to head for the breakroom.
There at the counter, he shivered at the anticipation of caffeine while dumping his sugar and creamer into the liquid pit.
Was this normal? He felt so far away from his own hands. It had been so long since he'd felt rested. How much longer was he expected to sacrifice for this job? There had to be light at the end soon, right? An age of decadence around the corner where this job showed its true comfortable colors.

He took a sip of his coffee and began to gitter a little more violently.

With the coffee only holding him over for so long, Guy found that after lunch he was hopelessly tired again. With nothing left to keep him together, he gave into the feeling and collapsed into his keyboard mid-email. He could feel it happening around him, but was so heavy in his collapse that being fired seemed better than getting up. Ok, maybe only a little bit better. Ok, actually it wasn't better, but he still didn't get up. There had to be something motivating enough, right? No, but if he went home he wouldn't have to be caught sleeping on the job. He just needed to get up and go home...

Time had passed. How long exactly? He thought he was getting up and going home, but still nothing had happened.

In between his brief cognitive thoughts he had gotten up after all, but as a barely conscious sleepwalker.
Attempting to do something that he kept changing and forgetting the purpose, he had walked into the middle of the office space at 6:28pm. There wasn't anyone left working in the office, but there were visitors.
While Guy was asleep, everyone had left him behind while rabbids took over the offices and labs.

Rabbids.. out of all things. If he was awake he would've been bolting out into the parking lot, but in his mind he was only in danger of sleeping himself into unemployment.
On the second floor office space, only a few cubicles from Guy, a rabbid in a similar predicament was hobbling around. Having a traffic cone stuck on his head over his eyes. Other rabbids were leading the stuck one with their voices, but mostly for comical effect. Once the cone rabbid followed them to the center of the office, they all counted out.

"Bwuh, bwah, bwah!" And the guides all ran off and hid.
The cone rabbid called out to the guides, but with no reply. It was clear they were playing again. He grunted and tried to pull his head out of the cone. It barely moved a centimeter. Sighing, he knew he had to find a guide to end the game, so he better be quick.

The rabbid guides hid under and on top of the cubicles, trying not to giggle when their amusement waddled past them and into a wall.
"Bo.." the cone rabbid said, taking a moment to re-establish where he was. He moved like a zombie with his arms out in front of him, ready to catch anyone and anything that got in his way.

Hearing footsteps, the cone rabbid paused. Yes! A giveaway! They couldn't hide from him forever. The cone rabbid bolted to the source of the steps, but tackled Guy's legs instead.

"Sorry.. excuse me.." Guy mumbled. His eyes were partially open, but he wasn't properly aware. The cone rabbid was surprised how sturdy what he thought the guide rabbid was. It didn't even budge when he tackled it, actually, they were more like two twin thin fabric-y rabbids who talked in perfect unison up in the air instead of from their mouths. The cone rabbid let go of the twin fabric rabbids and "Bleh.." in disgust at his own imagination, "..Abwah. Bwah bwah bwabwabwa..?" The cone rabbid poked the 'twin rabbids' and pointed to the cone on his head, asking for it to be removed.

"I've never really considered it something for me.." Guy said, lost in his dream. The cone rabbid waited for assistance but to no avail.
"..Bwah bwah.." He poked the 'twin rabbids' again and began to tap his foot impatiently.
"I'll get out of your hair.." Guy put his arms up and turned, walking away without the cone rabbid noticing.
The cone rabbid got to his limit and punched thin air, throwing himself to the floor.

The hiding guide rabbids hit their limits too, as they began to chuckle into uncontrolled laughter. Now knowing the locations of the real rabbid guides, the cone rabbid ran after them, causing a stampede of giggling bunnies trying to outrun him.

Amongst the chaos, Guy was in the way of the stampede, paused in actual slumber. They pushed him into nearly falling before catching himself.
"Alright! Alright! I'll go!" He shouted, sleepwalking out of the way and on route to the stairs. Behind him, the cone rabbid followed the stampede. At the exact same moment Guy and the rabbid took a blind step into nothing before tipping over the stairs into a tumbling fall. The guide rabbids turned to see the hilarious spectacle, laughing into wheezes.

"Ow.." Guy mumbled to himself, still asleep and unaware. He began to pick himself up on the lobby floor. The rabbid next to him was happy to discover the cone had popped off. Free, he put the cone back on his head, but like a hat as he originally planned. He sneered, spit, pretended to roll up his sleeves and marched to what were no longer his guides. They ran in all directions, weaving around Guy like an obstacle.
"..In a bit of a hurry," Guy said as he walked through the lobby and into the lab next door.

In the lab were even more rabbids playing with the glass instruments. Many watched as a talented bunny made water filled beakers sing by rubbing their hands in a circular motion over the rims.
Two rabbids, one missing his right eye and covered in stickers and the other wearing a bow tie, watched a hot plate that was on but wasn't hot-looking. A rabbid tried to sit on the hot plate like a stool, but at the slightest touch, they leaped nearly five feet in surprise. The rabbid covered in stickers chittered as they turned their bow-tied friend around to add to a tally written in marker on the back of his head. It was up to five now.

Guy walked over the hot plate, missing contact with it to the rabbids' disappointment.

Separated from the lab in a hall, a rabbid covered in edgy drawn on tattoos was busy trying his hand at lockpicking a vending machine. He had a sharp lockpick with him. To prepare, he took a deep breath and shoved the needle into the machine's lock as hard as he could. He bashed the needle deeper, screaming, destroying the mechanism entirely with only his hands. The door swung open, and he took his needle back, not that it actually aided in picking anything. He chuckled in amusement as he snatched a handful of pretzel bags.

Before he was able to enjoy them, five rabbids ran up asking for treats.
"Ba ba?" They asked, opening and closing their hands. The tattooed rabbid became defensive and shoved as many snacks as he could in his arms and ran off. The scavengers chased him. Seeing an opportunity to escape into a much more secure-looking door, the tattooed rabbid shoved the lock pick in its computerized lock and smashed it until it forced open. He snuck inside and held the door shut, only for him to be overpowered by Guy walking in.
"..Pardon," He said, accidentally letting the rest of the rabbids inside to chase the locksmith further.

A low hum coming from the chamber ahead distorted the air. Big Hope was one of the leading developers in laser based gene therapy, and this room contained such a beam shooting from one machine to the other continuously, its hum shaking the room, echoing almost too low to feel. Surrounding it were large devices to keep it cool and measure its status for irregularity, as well as scanners and computers to translate new data.

To get a height advantage, the tattooed rabbid began to climb these computers, using drawers of hardware like steps. One of these he stood on for too long, trying to grab a higher vantage point with one hand while holding his snacks in the other. The hardware pricked his foot to collect a drop of blood. Surprised at the pain, he fell, dropping everything.
The computer began to translate the blood sample, analyzing it as an unknown DNA sequence. The console's prompt on the screen read 'Apply New Sequence?' Y/N'.

Predictability assured, the scavenger rabbids swooped in on their opportunity to steal the snacks away from the locksmith, who wasn't too happy and chased them back.

Using the hardware as a vantage point again, a scavenger ran up the console's keyboard, stepping on the 'Y' along with many other keys, and sat at the top of the screen. The tattooed rabbid took a deep breath and ran up the console after him, hitting 'Enter' on the keyboard, as well as other keys and tackled the rabbid on top. They both fell and continued to run around the chamber, the scavengers winning by throwing the snacks to one another just before the tattooed rabbid could reach any individual.

At the same time, Guy was relaxed, leaning on the laser's hardware like it was a wall. He held one of his hands up as if he was holding something at chest level. He took a deep breath, covered in sweat from either the heat of the beam or his awkwardness.
"Do you.. Do you come here often?" He asked the laser. The laser hummed louder and started to change its shape from straight to warped. Guy took a sip of an invisible drink and cringed, "I'll see myself out..".

Fleeing his dream date, he walked into the path of the beam.
He lit up like a christmas tree, electrifying every cell. He became suddenly aware but confused with his eyes wide, and his face flexed into a frown. It took a moment to pass before he started screaming at what was happening. The rabbids had frozen, watching him as if he was going to explode.

Guy tried pulling himself away from the laser, but it took a great effort to escape its current. When he finally pulled through, he collapsed on the floor. The laser's hardware short circuited. The beam evaporated and the power went out, reducing its hum to silence.
"Bo.." a rabbid chirped in the dark, not sure how to react.

The backup power filled the empty space with sound and sight again. Still in a bit of shock from assuming a man was going to explode, the rabbids ended their feud and ran out of the room with any food they already had.

It took Guy a few minutes to come back to his senses. Was it a part of a dream, or had he really hurt himself bad this time? It had been years since he had sleep-walked with a frequency such as this. Doing a quick Google search between napping at home he'd found that his inability to get enough rest was probably the source of the pattern. Stupid work. Why did he do this to himself day in and day out? He didn't even like being here, and now he had electrocuted himself in a strange giant server room.

What was he supposed to do? Come back and do it again tomorrow? But his new position! There was no way an opportunity like that would be given to him at a new job. He didn't have nearly enough experience or educational requirements, starting him at the bottom all over again.
Maybe sleepwalking wasn't the problem. If he tied his ankle to his desk none of this would've happened. But what if he sleep-untied the knot? Lock and chain. Lock and chain would work, but that was for another day.

It was already past 7. If he wasn't fired for sleeping on the job, he'd need to come back feeling refreshed for tomorrow. Any longer in this building and he might as well cuddle up with the break room couch and sleep there. He earned his house, he could at least visit it from time to time.

He stood himself up and made his way out of the chamber and into the hall. Despite being asleep for a few hours, he felt abnormally sluggish. He wasn't in a big hurry, but it felt as though he wasn't going as fast as he liked, like something on him was slowing him down. The partially lit empty labs were already uncanny, but he didn't remember them being so big.

It had been a long time since he'd been in the labs, but it still didn't make much sense to build tables so tall you'd need a ladder to use them. It wasn't only the tables either. He had to jump up to reach the doorknobs.

Maybe it was a part of some experiment or team building exercise. He didn't see the sense in it.

Something like that didn't have anything to do with cancer research, and there were cheaper ways to bring coworkers together. Sometimes Big Hope could be foolish, so maybe they did spend thousands of dollars to make parts of the lab comically large.

What he didn't expect was for the lobby to be of a similar vastness.
He visited the lab only once or twice last year, but the lobby he passed through every single day. Was this really the same place? From far away it almost looked familiar, but up close it was clearly alien. The seats of the lobby's lounge chairs were up to his face. The front desk was several feet taller than he was. He was beginning to doubt again until he spotted the local bulletin board with the very same advertisements and research achievements pinned to it. Even Theo's hand-written bowling team sign up was there, high above his natural line of sight.

Guy started to feel sick. It was so unnerving like a dream but shockingly vivid as reality. He had to go home right now. This all would make sense tomorrow. This had to be only a confused state of mind, starving for sleep but without feeling tired.

He tried to stop the sinking panic he was feeling while climbing the steps with a railing he used to be able to reach, up to the second floor office where things were still obtuse and confusing.

Maybe he was crawling on his knees and didn't realize due to his fried nerves from the electrocution. The only thing he would need to do would be to get someplace high and put his legs out in front of him. That way, he could balance on them and try to get them to work again.

To test this he climbed an office chair and sat in it to see his legs, but his pants were mostly empty of much leg. He stared at where the majority of his legs used to be, without a clue as to how to react. This was the last thing he expected, an absolute nightmare of a reveal. It was so shocking he had to hold the chair to keep himself from falling. His pants would have been drenched in blood if they had been torn off, and he wasn't in any pain.

Then again, how could he rule anything out at this point? He could be bleeding out right now and all of the weird things he was seeing was a hallucination before his collapse and death, yet somehow he doubted this.
The absence of much leg was a very simple cause for everything's imposing size. If he was short, everything would seem much bigger, right? He noticed his own shivering self. Similar to his nearly empty pants, what he thought were longer than normal sleeves was missing most of his arm length too. His arms couldn't be missing, could they? They couldn't be! He could still feel everything perfectly intact underneath. He took a deep breath and gently used one arm to pull back the sleeve of the other. He could hardly keep his eyes open as he pulled it back to reveal something white.

He was so surprised he covered it up again before he got a good look. Unlike the light skin of a caucasian, whatever was in place of his hand was practically pale as paper. He built up the courage to bunch up his sleeve again and take a proper look.

His first peek wasn't a fluke. His arm really was pale as paper. In fact, what made up the color was a sort of short but multitudinous white hair. It wasn't even as if he was merely a hairy guy. This was a dedicated fur like that of a dog. Unlike a dog though, he didn't have any thick paw pads, toes, or even nails at the end of his hands. They were basic, like mittens. No fingers, a thumb, and a soft hairless pink palm.

The look was starting to become familiar, but he couldn't properly piece it together. It was causing him to panic at the idea, as if he already knew he hated it yet couldn't pinpoint why. It was so close to being something he knew. Where did he remember it from?! He closed his eyes and tried to think, but it was so difficult.

While trying to stay still, he noticed something shift on the top of his head. It didn't shift on its own either. He could move something there. Two somethings! They were pretty long, so he bent them forward and stretched them down towards his face to try and see them.

Ah..ears.

Ok, what had white fur, pink skin, mitten hands, and long ears? Maybe a sledding dog wearing booties... no. He had seen it that morning, but now it felt so far away. What was the TV talking about that had to do with this, with burning watermelons? In a sudden epiphany it had become clear, but his panic only heightened more.
He probably should have thought of this sooner, but his coworker Sandra had a full-body mirror next to her cubicle. He closed his eyes and winced at what he knew he was going to have to do.

He hopped off the chair and discarded his pants since they were slowing him down so much. Not that he was really concerned with anyone seeing his underwear. His shirt was so big on him now it could be considered a robe and then some.

He knew that past this next cubicle, he'd be able to see the mirror. He didn't want to hesitate any longer, so he walked into the space and saw himself from far down the hall. He looked behind him, hoping that maybe there was someone else the mirror was reflecting, but the image copied his movements exactly. He started to feel lightheaded. He could hardly keep his gaze on what he was seeing. Now it was really the truth.

Long ears, white fur, buck teeth, short stature, these were all things that made up a rabbid. It was getting difficult to hold himself up. Everything was so tall, the whole room was starting to spin. How was this even possible? That he was a man this morning and a rabbid now?

Everybody knew that you weren't supposed to interact when it came to rabbids, but what was Guy supposed to do now that he was one?
First of all, he couldn't come back to work like this. Hell, he couldn't even drive home with such little legs. What was going to happen if he couldn't get a job? He'd lose his car, his house, his nice bed and TV, all his food, his computer, his bathroom. He'd be forced on the street, unable to do anything to change his fate. He could see people coming into his house to resell what he rightfully owned as if he wasn't there, but he would be there, screaming and begging them to stop. He'd use every last bit of his strength, but it wouldn't matter. Against all logic, he was rabbid, and there wasn't anything he could do about it.

He originally came up here to get his stuff, but what did it matter? He tucked himself under a desk and started to weep.

"Hey, shh, you'll give us away," someone whispered.
Guy focused through his developing tears. There was another rabbid under the desk who was missing their right eye, but was spotted in an assortment of stickers.
"Huh..?"
"Don't you know how to play hide and seek? If you have to cry, you must be quiet," Stickers said. Guy paused his emotional breakdown to absorb the fact that a rabbid was talking to him. At first he thought the voice was coming from somewhere else, but it really was coming from the stickers rabbid.
"..You're playing hide and seek?" Guy sniffled.
"Isn't that what you're doing too?"
"No, I.. I don't know what I'm doing," Guy said.
"Then play, it's easy. It's only sitting, moving from spot to spot, and being quiet," Stickers put his hand to his mouth.

Guy fell silent and nodded, his tears flowing again. Stickers kept a lookout for a seeker, giving Guy the opportunity to look at them without eye contact.

This was the closest Guy had ever been to a rabbid, at least from his memory and exclusion of himself. As far as studies were concerned, rabbids were hyperactive and prone to senseless violence, but this one was calm and waiting. Maybe rabbids were still hyperactive and violent but Stickers was patient enough to wait before striking, or maybe the scientists were wrong, or maybe Stickers was different.

There were so many questions Guy could ask, but was there anything worth mentioning? A rabbid couldn't get him his life back.

"Is there a fire?" Stickers asked. It caught Guy off guard.
"No.. what?" He wheezed by mistake.
"Then why are you crying?"
"It's complicated.." Guy said. Stickers rolled his eyes, but Guy didn't see it, blinded by his tears.

Stickers sighed, tapping his foot to think before making a decision. He peeled a sticker off of themselves and walked up to Guy. He stuck it on Guy's shirt and walked back to where he had been sitting. Guy sat up and held his shirt out in front of him to see it.
A foil fish sticker splashing out of water. It shined in the light, reflecting its soothing blues and greens. He tilted it to see it reflect in different ways, scales just detailed enough for him to enjoy following the pattern with his eyes.

It was weird to admit to himself, but he actually found it calming. Was that the rabbid's intention? Maybe Stickers only wanted to get Guy to pipe down, but this was one of their stickers wasn't it? It had to be given out of kindness, it had to be. He leaned back, closed his eyes, and held his shirt tight. He felt a smile shiver up his face. It was a really hard to read kooky smile, but he was feeling a little confused himself. When he opened his eyes, the rabbid was gone. Maybe he had hallucinated the whole thing, or maybe Stickers was no rabbid but an angel.. Or maybe he was just running away somewhere. Guy could see them sprinting.

"Haha! Found you!" a rabbid wearing a bow tie said, pointing at Guy, "Now you have to rat out the others!"
Guy looked at Stickers hiding under another desk across the room. The rabbid shook his head at the idea of being ratted out. Guy reluctantly agreed to keep the secret, even if it meant they had to be separated. Tie had already moved on from talking to Guy, climbing up a desk chair and mashing the keyboard.
"This is how a human types," Tie said, "Bwabwahbwahbwahbwah," He typed 'Hotdoghotdoghotdoghotdoghotdog', "Hello?" He looked under the keyboard, searching for a rabbid. Guy crawled out from under the desk to see more rabbids looking around the place. The seekers had made it to the second floor office.

"Hey, nice outfit by the way. Are you an office monk?" Tie asked. Guy looked up to see him, stapling the desk while he was talking.
"No, I guess I work.. well worked, in an office," Guy said.
"O cool, what did you do? Ow," Tie accidentally stapled his hand.
"Finance manager," Guy said.
"Huh..Oh! You worked with money! How did you ever get to do something like that!? In my human opinion, rabbids aren't too great at money," Tie said.

"In your human opinion?" Guy squinted his eyes.
"Ah yes, my human opinion! I consider myself an honorary human. I'm kinda the expert. Don't mean to brag, but I used to live with them, study them! I learned their ways, so I can pretty much navigate any human space," Tie said, "Er, like this computer for example," Tie made a 'C' shape with one of his hands and stroked his other outstretched arm with it in a circular motion. He sat on the desk with the keyboard in his lap, "The keys make up words to the humans. If you type it just right, you can get a prize or play a game! And you use this moose to guide the doodad in the computer world."

"You mean a mouse?" Guy climbed up the chair and desk and sat next to Tie, "Could I?"
"Sure, go ahead, but the computer world is vast and complicated!" Tie handed the keyboard and mouse to Guy, who went into the company's files. He launched Tetris, and a main menu appeared. Guy started the game, a single four tiled piece fell from the top of the screen.
"A block game?" Tie tilted his head and illustrated the perimeter of a cube with his hands before gently colliding two thumbs ups knuckle to knuckle.

"People call it Tetris," Guy said, "You move the blocks around and try to fill in the space, and uh, and then you get points when they disappear." Guy organized the falling pieces so that a line of them vanished. He sniffled, still recovering from his cry.
"Oooo! Ok, I get it. Let me try!" Tie swiped the keyboard back from Guy and focused hard, hanging his tongue out, "..This is harder than it looks.."
Stickers walked up behind them.
"They found me," He said.
"Hold on just a sec, I have to finish this for good luck on the mission," Tie said.

"The game doesn't end unless you lose," Guy explained. Tie winced.
"You're telling me I have to intentionally LOSE if I ever want to leave this desk?" Tie started to sweat.
"I mean you could als-"
"NO! I want to lose the real way! This game will have to defeat me first! I'd rather starve!" Tie said. Other rabbids started to gather around the computer monitor to see what all the commotion was about. Guy became a little intimidated by the number of bunnies that were surrounding him, but they weren't doing anything yet. Stickers jumped up to climb the desk, which caught Guy by surprise.
"Bwah! Oh it's you," Guy immediately covered his mouth, turning red in embarrassment. Stickers squinted at him in suspicion.

It only occurred to Guy now that rabbids never spoke English like he was hearing it, or rather how he was understanding it. They had to be speaking like rabbids always spoke. When he focussed, he could just barely hear their language for what it really sounded like. They weren't speaking English in the slightest, but Guy had almost thought they were.

Could he even speak English anymore? Could he make out the difference between rabbid speak and English enough to say something? Ask for help? Could anybody help him, even if he could say something?
What about his parents? He was supposed to see them this Christmas. Would they think he was dead? Could he even stand to go back and see them as he was now? Even if he got them to believe it was him, how would they treat him? Unable to get a job, drive a car, or even speak. He'd probably have to move back in with them. What a deadbeat..

Maybe it would cause too much pain to try and communicate with his parents. If this had happened to his mother instead, Guy knew he wouldn't have believed her. He'd be especially offended if his mother had gone missing or was declared dead too. How insulting to even suggest his mother wasn't really lost, but had been transformed into the ugliest mystery Earth ever had to be burdened with. Rabbid, his mother? What a joke.

He'd never get people like his parents to understand, not even someone like himself. He needed somebody better than that. He was a rabbid on the outside, sure, but there had to be someone out there that could recognize him for who he really was, even if he had to find a human more open minded than himself to do it. It would be different, but if he could make a connection, maybe he could reverse this. People would realize what a tragedy this is, that he wasn't a pest. That he wasn't a rabbid and didn't deserve to be treated like one.
If only he could just say something, anything.

He felt it well up in him, preparing, but just before his attempt, it broke. He lost it and breathed out a bwah.
He had the meaning of his plea so close to his lips, but the word itself had become foreign, forgotten. What were the letters that spelled out a plea for help anyway? It was so hard to think.

"Dude, hey! You!" Tie poked Guy. The game screen was back to the main menu, "What should we do now?" Tie swung both of his forearms down in front of him with his hands in a 'y' shape, he then used one hand to poke each of his shoulders, then he put one hand up palm facing out, with an imaginary pointer finger curled upward to then tilt that hand downward, and then finally, he held both hands up again, palms facing him, and tapped his imaginary pointer fingers to his thumbs.
"Uh," Guy had to snap out of his thoughts.

"Are there any more games on the computer you know about?" Tie put his fists together with his thumbs up and made a pleading face. All the rabbids were staring at him.
"Not on these computers.." Guy said.
"Then how do we start the game again?" A rabbid in the crowd asked.
"Move the mouse over to 'play' and click on it?" Guy hovered the mouse over the play button, but he was shoved off the desk by the crowd snapping over who got to play next, "ow."

Tie climbed down from the desk to meet him but accidentally grabbed a drawer on the way down, sliding it out of its track and spilling all of its contents on the floor.

"Hehe, oops. Ooh! Jawbreaker!" Tie picked up the candy and took a bite, but it launched out of his mouth and bounced around the room, "Not a Jawbreaker! Hey, look!" From the contents of the drawer was a spare tie, a black one, "It's just like yours! Out with the fancy, in with the bismuth!" Tie took off his bow tie and tried to make a proper knot with the new one, but he gave up halfway through and partially tied it like a scarf. Stickers walked up next to him, unfazed by the commotion around the computer. Tie turned to face them with a grin. He put his hand up to the base of his neck, and dragged it down his body like that of his garment, he then put his thumb to his chest while wiggling the mitten-ish mass that would be four fingers on a human.

"Are you ready to go?" Stickers asked him.
"Yeah, I'm getting pretty hungry," Tie put his right hand up to his chest and moved it down to his stomach.
"Are you two going out to eat?" Guy asked. Tie nodded. Stickers spoke up.
"These guys are supposed to be too," they pointed with a thumb at the crowd watching the computer, "but I think the new game's more important for now."

"Ok, well, this is going to sound a little random because we just met, but could I come with you? I'm sorta lost, don't really know what to do, but you two seem like nice, er, rabbids. It wouldn't bwather you if I followed you around, would it?"

The two looked at one another as if he were asking a strange question.
"Of course you can come!" Tie said.
"The mission is open to any rabbid who wants to participate," Stickers said.

"Oh good! And here I was thinking that I was intruding," Guy said. He was trying not to get too emotional. Being accepted at a time like this was something he definitely needed. They were rabbids, sure, but these people were easy to talk to, non-threatening. Guy didn't want to be a rabbid forever if he could help it, but the possibility of ever turning back was slim to none. If this was how he was going to be from now on, he would have to start over right here, right now.

"Ha, you talk weird," Tie pointed to Guy, before putting what would have been his pointer finger to his chin with the rest of his fingers spread out, then tilting that hand forward, after that he took his left hand and moved across the front of his face opening and closing it like a pac man.
"..You do a lot of stuff with your hands while you talk," Guy observed.
"It's what he gets for being Italian. I've been trying to teach him to stop for years," Stickers said. Tie nodded, "Let's not waste any more time in this place. We're going to miss it at this rate," Stickers began to walk toward the stairs. Guy and Tie followed.
"So, er what are we eating.. exactly?" Guy asked Tie.
"Human food," Tie said.
"Ohthanktheheavens," Guy mumbled with relief.

2/10/2023
4/23/2023

Title from "What I Want" by The Living Tombstone.